Health Anxiety

[[Re...]]

REMY - thanks for the meditation.....

 

Right now I am FREAKING out about these nodules in the back of my neck - my husband finally felt them and agreed that I need to have them checked out - I'm especially worried because I did the most dangerous thing possible - I "GOOGLED" it - and the first thing that came back was THYROID CANCER - I'm having LOTS of problems with my thyroid right now........So I guess I'll be calling the Dr. this week to have it checked out - I struggle with  my blood pressure and a sure fire way to get a high pressure is to go to the Dr where they take your VITALS

 

SIGH.......

 

Yikes! Sounds like a big scare. I have a swollen lymph node in my neck as well. I read on here this it is more than. Likely withdrawel . It's better to be safe than sorry though. Don't just agree with whatever the doctor tells you after your apt. Do some research before you take any meds as well. I am sure your gonna be okay.  Our body is all out of wack so it makes sense we would have swollen or hard nodes. Did you have this issue before withdrawel ?

[[fi...]]

 

 

 

Yikes! Sounds like a big scare. I have a swollen lymph node in my neck as well. I read on here this it is more than. Likely withdrawel . It's better to be safe than sorry though. Don't just agree with whatever the doctor tells you after your apt. Do some research before you take any meds as well. I am sure your gonna be okay.  Our body is all out of wack so it makes sense we would have swollen or hard nodes. Did you have this issue before withdrawel ?

 

No never that I know of......these are nodules in like 3 different places - bizarre - i know that the odds are its nothing but still.........

[[Gr...]]

When I saw a nurse practitioner a couple days ago she asked me if I knew that my pupils are not the same size. So now I'm wondering if that's a problem or is it withdrawal. I did notice a long time ago this happening when I looked in the mirror a couple of times but when I asked an optician about it they said my pupils were fine. I have a feeling I was in tolerance withdrawal then and it was causing it and now this withdrawal is causing it to happen again. But at the same time I'm still trying not to freak out about it. Gosh isn't this fun?

[[fi...]]

Grandma - I'd look that up bc I do think I've read it's a symptom of withdrawal.........and I have HORRENDOUS vision issues with this withdrawal.......

[[Gr...]]

Grandma - I'd look that up bc I do think I've read it's a symptom of withdrawal.........and I have HORRENDOUS vision issues with this withdrawal.......

 

I'm so glad you posted this as now I'm not as anxious. Thank you! I've also noticed that my vision has changed and I need to use reading glasses to look at my cell phone now. This came on during withdrawal. What kind of vision issues do you have?

[[fi...]]

Grandma - I had/have TONS of vision issues with withdrawal - Dry eyes so bad I had to have my tear ducts cauterized (worked like a CHARM and an easy fix thats NOT permanent in case it scares people) - Blurry Blurry Blurry vision - Had to get a new prescription for my glasses after having the SAME one for 15 or 20 years - Black spots in the corners of my vision - tracers in my vision - and these are DEF. WITHDRAWAL - I had them all SO bad when I came off the klonipin and ALL went away when I reinstated - and now with this taper........ I got ahead of myself and had bad sxs - including the vision stuff - when I updosed - it mostly went away.

 

Also when I was off the Klonipin but didn't realize I was in withdrawal (was literally walking around this town in so much pain like a zombie from dr to dr trying to figure out what was wrong with me - I even had one Dr diagnose me with thyroid eye disease (if it got worse, he said, I might lose my vision or need radiation or surgery) - A second opinion said that she didn't think I had Thyroid Eye Disease -

 

I would look up the pupil thing bc I'm pretty sure I've seen that listed somewhere too.......

[[Gr...]]

Grandma - I had/have TONS of vision issues with withdrawal - Dry eyes so bad I had to have my tear ducts cauterized (worked like a CHARM and an easy fix thats NOT permanent in case it scares people) - Blurry Blurry Blurry vision - Had to get a new prescription for my glasses after having the SAME one for 15 or 20 years - Black spots in the corners of my vision - tracers in my vision - and these are DEF. WITHDRAWAL - I had them all SO bad when I came off the klonipin and ALL went away when I reinstated - and now with this taper........ I got ahead of myself and had bad sxs - including the vision stuff - when I updosed - it mostly went away.

 

Also when I was off the Klonipin but didn't realize I was in withdrawal (was literally walking around this town in so much pain like a zombie from dr to dr trying to figure out what was wrong with me - I even had one Dr diagnose me with thyroid eye disease (if it got worse, he said, I might lose my vision or need radiation or surgery) - A second opinion said that she didn't think I had Thyroid Eye Disease -

 

I would look up the pupil thing bc I'm pretty sure I've seen that listed somewhere too.......

 

I will try to look that up tomorrow. I hope I remember to do that. My you sure have a lot of my problems. I have very dry eyes also. And I see in your signature that you were diagnosed with osteopenia. So was I! These drugs are really something aren't they?! And it's up to us to learn what type of symptoms they can cause so we don't get diagnosed with something we don't have or take another drug to cure something we don't have. 

I am in Texas also.

[[fi...]]

 

 

I will try to look that up tomorrow. I hope I remember to do that. My you sure have a lot of my problems. I have very dry eyes also. And I see in your signature that you were diagnosed with osteopenia. So was I! These drugs are really something aren't they?! And it's up to us to learn what type of symptoms they can cause so we don't get diagnosed with something we don't have or take another drug to cure something we don't have. 

I am in Texas also.

 

Yes, Osteopenia -  and then the year following my 3 months in horrendous withdrawal - my Osteopenia had moved into full blown Osteoporosis - I'm in my 40's and no menopause yet......

 

BTW - I learned during all of it that the diagnosis of "Osteopenia" didn't  EXIST until bone drugs were introduced to the market - a way of widening the pool of potential "patients" - criminal.......

 

and Yes, Benzo's are truly diabolical, right?.......by the time we realize what hell is at hand - we're too sick to get the word out......at least for me - my ability to communicate and articulate has been greatly hindered......the word retrieval issues, cog fog, etc......I'm so verbose but say nothing!

 

But for today - I try and stay positive and believe that "this too shall pass" and I believe it......we will heal

 

Glad to see another Texan on the board!

[[bo...]]

Oh yes me too ! Its apparently very common ..vision issues . In fact I did read somewhere not to contemplate  new glasses in withdrawal , but have to. My vision is terrible and it effects my balance. I also think my pupils dilate so much more and that doesn't help.

Remy thanks for the reassurance around the night time anxiety xx

[[Re...]]

Ugh I am freaking out about this hard lump on the back of my neck. It has been there for over a year. My doctor told me it's nothing , but he just felt it he never did any tests. It's right where my neck and head connect. There is no paint in it at all. Should I get it checked out again and have them run some tests? It sounds to stressful to go in to the doctors.

[[Ce...]]

Ugh I am freaking out about this hard lump on the back of my neck. It has been there for over a year. My doctor told me it's nothing , but he just felt it he never did any tests. It's right where my neck and head connect. There is no paint in it at all. Should I get it checked out again and have them run some tests? It sounds to stressful to go in to the doctors.

 

Hi Remy,

 

I would if it were me, just to ease my mind! What's it going to hurt?? It's probably fairly simple I would think...maybe he can do it in the office??

[[bo...]]

Does anyone have issues with excess saliva in the mouth? I don't recall having this pre benzo. The other night I woke up and the pillow case and too of the sheet were sopping  wet!

It doesn't seem to be reflux as no issue further down.. I hate it !

[[fi...]]

Bozo (Ha - love typing that) - I've read of excess saliva a to - particularly drooling in your sleep (if you are lucky enough to sleep)

 

Remy - I have those hard lumps - nodules - ALL OVER the back of my neck - like 4 of them - going to Dr first week of November and just trying to stay calm.......more than likely nothing - a freaked out immune system?? Mine are multiplying!! So I def. need to have it checked - I just dont want anyone cutting into the back of my neck! 

[[Gr...]]

Fight, I can see where the lumps would cause you to worry. They are probably nothing, but having them checked out will then put your mind to rest. I have lumps or rather tiny hard bumps inside my mouth on my lower jaw due to clenching my teeth at night from the anxiety. The last time I saw the dentist I only had two but now I've got four! She didn't seem too concerned but she said we'll watch them. And I sure don't want them messing around in my mouth! By the way, I apologize for not replying to your message. Life's been awful crazy for me lately with dr. Appointments, voting, Labs getting done on Friday and tomorrow repair people will be in our home. I barely have enough time to post on here as it is and I miss it! Keep us posted how it goes with having those lumps checked out okay? Hugs.

[[fi...]]

No worries Grandma! I understand - I just sometimes feel guilty hogging the board, so I send PM's to avoid that........good luck with all you have on your plate!  ((((HUGS))))

[[bo...]]

Never feel guilty for being on the board anywhere.. that's what we are all here for. Sometimes we need each other more than other times .. just how it is .. take care xx

[[2t...]]

I would get physical bumps checked out, it is most likely to do with withdrawal but better to be safe and get some reassurance.

[[fi...]]

Thank you both - I will have them checked out - I have appt's the first week of November - Scared, I am - but trying to stay calm........thanks for your support!

[[bo...]]

And even if they are not withdrawal they could be something quite benign ...

best know what you're dealing with ... easy for me to say I know .

I would be terrified about going to get them checked ! All the ' what ifs ' raging away !

But you gotta do it hun .. we're with you all the way x

[[bo...]]

Good morning /evening. health  anxiety buddies.

Would like to share with you an experience I had last night . Probably not the right forum but I am motivated by my thought process with this !

Last night I went with my sister to a performance of ' a tribute to Abba' all of you my age will know the music! Anyway it was a mindset marothon to even get there with all the people let alone sit comfortably in a packed out auditorium ... when the lights went out and the music started , and the crowd were on their feet , I felt the chest pains start , the mouth went dry , my insides started churning ( you know what I mean !) . Could feel clammy hands and face and was working out how to get to the exit door .. then I did some thought stopping techniques which sort of worked , but not quite, and realised that the heart attack or stroke or worse was imminent !! Panic .. then I simply thought .. you can stand up , you can move with this music like everyone else was doing and enjoying themselves , and consciously thought  well !! If you're going to drop down dead might as well do it enjoying yourself .. I forced myself out of the seat and knew I'd  either die or join in the enjoyment..

 

I conquered the fear !! Last night I fought through my anxiety and won ! I was a 'normal' person enjoying the show... so ..so .. pleased.

Usually when .i make myself go to these things I am looking at my watch wondering when it will finish ! This is a real break through. Doesn't mean it will happen next time , or even for a while , but it shows I actually can control that thought process even for a tiny amount of time..

 

Loving it ... thanks for listening  xxx

 

[[Gr...]]

Good morning /evening. health  anxiety buddies.

Would like to share with you an experience I had last night . Probably not the right forum but I am motivated by my thought process with this !

Last night I went with my sister to a performance of ' a tribute to Abba' all of you my age will know the music! Anyway it was a mindset marothon to even get there with all the people let alone sit comfortably in a packed out auditorium ... when the lights went out and the music started , and the crowd were on their feet , I felt the chest pains start , the mouth went dry , my insides started churning ( you know what I mean !) . Could feel clammy hands and face and was working out how to get to the exit door .. then I did some thought stopping techniques which sort of worked , but not quite, and realised that the heart attack or stroke or worse was imminent !! Panic .. then I simply thought .. you can stand up , you can move with this music like everyone else was doing and enjoying themselves , and consciously thought  well !! If you're going to drop down dead might as well do it enjoying yourself .. I forced myself out of the seat and knew I'd  either die or join in the enjoyment..

 

I conquered the fear !! Last night I fought through my anxiety and won ! I was a 'normal' person enjoying the show... so ..so .. pleased.

Usually when .i make myself go to these things I am looking at my watch wondering when it will finish ! This is a real break through. Doesn't mean it will happen next time , or even for a while , but it shows I actually can control that thought process even for a tiny amount of time..

 

Loving it ... thanks for listening  xxx

 

Wow! Bozo you did it!!!  :clap:  And I am so impressed!  That really encourages me - Thank you!

[[bl...]]

Here's a Dr. Seuss spoof I wrote in the middle of worst part of my taper. Hopefully it will make you chuckle. Funny thing is--I wasn't joking!!!

 

Oh, The Diseases You Have!

 

Apologies!

Today you’re okay.

You’re probably dying

But not right away

 

Pain in your pelvis?

Unable to pee?

It could be your prostrate

Or nothing, you see

 

You’re probably right. It’s just an infection!

But what’s going on with your loss of erection?

 

Your fingers are numb

Your feet are all crimson

It’s worse in the shower

A curious symptom

 

Your suffering seems to be worse when it’s hot

Ninety degrees and a nose full of snot

Your skin is so itchy, your vision’s been blurry

Feeling off-balance? Try not to worry

 

Try to stay calm, no need to obsess

A good MRI can rule out MS

But if it’s too early, it could stand to reason

That you DO have MS, but don’t yet have lesions

 

You could have Raynauds, man, it’s probably harmless

But along with your symptoms, you could end up armless

That tingling? It could mean your blood flow’s restricted

Or maybe it’s something much worse than predicted

 

Pain? In your leg? When you rest, is it sore?

It throbs? Oh, man, you didn’t say THAT before.

You’ve lost how much weight? It could be arthritis

But at your age, it’s time to consider phlebitis

 

Or Lupus, Sclerdoma, Celiac or Spondylitis

Hashimoto’s, Grave’s, or perhaps Cholangitis

There’s swelling? How bad? Like a hot air balloon?

If you’re a woman, it’s auto-immune.

 

Of course, see your doctor, get your blood work today

RNP, ESR, don’t forget ANA

And if it comes back with a positive score

Try to stay calm, get yourself off the floor.

These results can change daily, week to week, year to year

No reason to worry, but SO much to fear

 

You’ll be in a wheelchair!

Or supine in bed!

You’ll be in a Medvac

Or maybe just dead.

 

There’s that lump on your foot, a likely Neuroma

But what if, in fact, it’s a tissue sarcoma?

 

With fear in your heart

You’ll look for an answer

But don’t Google that!

No Band-aid for cancer

 

A click of the mouse, the whole room is spinning

Psychosomatic? It’s just the beginning

No doubt you feel stiffer, so long flexibility

Forgot your kid’s birthday? HELLO senility!

 

But YOU won’t do nothing, because YOU are invested

In being proactive, and being well-tested

Whatever your symptoms, whatever you get

You’ll find the answers, they’re all on the Net

 

Except when you don’t

Because, sometimes you won’t

I’m sorry to say so

But, sadly it’s true

 

Sometimes your hands will be green or just blue

Sometimes you’ll be dizzy, or sweaty or yellow

And sometimes your body will feel like it’s Jello

It could just be a cold, or a sinus infection

But nothing says YOU like early detection

 

And should you come out of that dark, doomy place

And realize your worries have all been misplaced

Rejoice in your fortune, enjoy your condition

And remember how little you like your physician

 

For what does he know of a panic attack?

Of the pain he inflicts when he won’t call you back?

He hooks you on drugs of every variety

And tells you your symptoms are all from anxiety.

 

Meditation might help, taking deep breaths

Nothing like quiet, to tick off the deaths

Of all those good friends, you used to adore

Who had some odd symptom, they chose to ignore

 

That little black mole, adorning Sue’s cheek

The day Tim went skiing, despite feeling weak

The case of the runs, the blood in Ron’s stool

But you’re here to stay, cause you’re nobody’s fool!

 

So congratulations!

You might be okay.

You’re definitely dying

But perhaps not today!

 

[[Ce...]]

Here's a Dr. Seuss spoof I wrote in the middle of worst part of my taper. Hopefully it will make you chuckle. Funny thing is--I wasn't joking!!!

 

Oh, The Diseases You Have!

 

Apologies!

Today you’re okay.

You’re probably dying

But not right away

 

Pain in your pelvis?

Unable to pee?

It could be your prostrate

Or nothing, you see

 

You’re probably right. It’s just an infection!

But what’s going on with your loss of erection?

 

Your fingers are numb

Your feet are all crimson

It’s worse in the shower

A curious symptom

 

Your suffering seems to be worse when it’s hot

Ninety degrees and a nose full of snot

Your skin is so itchy, your vision’s been blurry

Feeling off-balance? Try not to worry

 

Try to stay calm, no need to obsess

A good MRI can rule out MS

But if it’s too early, it could stand to reason

That you DO have MS, but don’t yet have lesions

 

You could have Raynauds, man, it’s probably harmless

But along with your symptoms, you could end up armless

That tingling? It could mean your blood flow’s restricted

Or maybe it’s something much worse than predicted

 

Pain? In your leg? When you rest, is it sore?

It throbs? Oh, man, you didn’t say THAT before.

You’ve lost how much weight? It could be arthritis

But at your age, it’s time to consider phlebitis

 

Or Lupus, Sclerdoma, Celiac or Spondylitis

Hashimoto’s, Grave’s, or perhaps Cholangitis

There’s swelling? How bad? Like a hot air balloon?

If you’re a woman, it’s auto-immune.

 

Of course, see your doctor, get your blood work today

RNP, ESR, don’t forget ANA

And if it comes back with a positive score

Try to stay calm, get yourself off the floor.

These results can change daily, week to week, year to year

No reason to worry, but SO much to fear

 

You’ll be in a wheelchair!

Or supine in bed!

You’ll be in a Medvac

Or maybe just dead.

 

There’s that lump on your foot, a likely Neuroma

But what if, in fact, it’s a tissue sarcoma?

 

With fear in your heart

You’ll look for an answer

But don’t Google that!

No Band-aid for cancer

 

A click of the mouse, the whole room is spinning

Psychosomatic? It’s just the beginning

No doubt you feel stiffer, so long flexibility

Forgot your kid’s birthday? HELLO senility!

 

But YOU won’t do nothing, because YOU are invested

In being proactive, and being well-tested

Whatever your symptoms, whatever you get

You’ll find the answers, they’re all on the Net

 

Except when you don’t

Because, sometimes you won’t

I’m sorry to say so

But, sadly it’s true

 

Sometimes your hands will be green or just blue

Sometimes you’ll be dizzy, or sweaty or yellow

And sometimes your body will feel like it’s Jello

It could just be a cold, or a sinus infection

But nothing says YOU like early detection

 

And should you come out of that dark, doomy place

And realize your worries have all been misplaced

Rejoice in your fortune, enjoy your condition

And remember how little you like your physician

 

For what does he know of a panic attack?

Of the pain he inflicts when he won’t call you back?

He hooks you on drugs of every variety

And tells you your symptoms are all from anxiety.

 

Meditation might help, taking deep breaths

Nothing like quiet, to tick off the deaths

Of all those good friends, you used to adore

Who had some odd symptom, they chose to ignore

 

That little black mole, adorning Sue’s cheek

The day Tim went skiing, despite feeling weak

The case of the runs, the blood in Ron’s stool

But you’re here to stay, cause you’re nobody’s fool!

 

So congratulations!

You might be okay.

You’re definitely dying

But perhaps not today!

 

 

This is good!!... ok..not funny, but funny!  I can relate to this Seuss Spoof...good job blue. I needed a laugh!....

[[bl...]]

I wrote this mid-taper--and really--was barely joking!!!

 

Oh, The Diseases You Have!

 

Apologies!

Today you’re okay.

You’re probably dying

But not right away

 

Pain in your pelvis?

Unable to pee?

It could be your prostrate

Or nothing, you see

 

You’re probably right. It’s just an infection!

But what’s going on with your loss of erection?

 

Your fingers are numb

Your feet are all crimson

It’s worse in the shower

A curious symptom

 

Your suffering seems to be worse when it’s hot

Ninety degrees and a nose full of snot

Your skin is so itchy, your vision’s been blurry

Feeling off-balance? Try not to worry

 

Try to stay calm, no need to obsess

A good MRI can rule out MS

But if it’s too early, it could stand to reason

That you DO have MS, but don’t yet have lesions

 

You could have Raynauds, man, it’s probably harmless

But along with your symptoms, you could end up armless

That tingling? It could mean your blood flow’s restricted

Or maybe it’s something much worse than predicted

 

Pain? In your leg? When you rest, is it sore?

It throbs? Oh, man, you didn’t say THAT before.

You’ve lost how much weight? It could be arthritis

But at your age, it’s time to consider phlebitis

 

Or Lupus, Sclerdoma, Celiac or Spondylitis

Hashimoto’s, Grave’s, or perhaps Cholangitis

There’s swelling? How bad? Like a hot air balloon?

If you’re a woman, it’s auto-immune.

 

Of course, see your doctor, get your blood work today

RNP, ESR, don’t forget ANA

And if it comes back with a positive score

Try to stay calm, get yourself off the floor.

These results can change daily, week to week, year to year

No reason to worry, but SO much to fear

 

You’ll be in a wheelchair!

Or supine in bed!

You’ll be in a Medvac

Or maybe just dead.

 

There’s that lump on your foot, a likely Neuroma

But what if, in fact, it’s a tissue sarcoma?

 

With fear in your heart

You’ll look for an answer

But don’t Google that!

No Band-aid for cancer

 

A click of the mouse, the whole room is spinning

Psychosomatic? It’s just the beginning

No doubt you feel stiffer, so long flexibility

Forgot your kid’s birthday? HELLO senility!

 

But YOU won’t do nothing, because YOU are invested

In being proactive, and being well-tested

Whatever your symptoms, whatever you get

You’ll find the answers, they’re all on the Net

 

Except when you don’t

Because, sometimes you won’t

I’m sorry to say so

But, sadly it’s true

 

Sometimes your hands will be green or just blue

Sometimes you’ll be dizzy, or sweaty or yellow

And sometimes your body will feel like it’s Jello

It could just be a cold, or a sinus infection

But nothing says YOU like early detection

 

And should you come out of that dark, doomy place

And realize your worries have all been misplaced

Rejoice in your fortune, enjoy your condition

And remember how little you like your physician

 

For what does he know of a panic attack?

Of the pain he inflicts when he won’t call you back?

He hooks you on drugs of every variety

And tells you your symptoms are all from anxiety.

 

Meditation might help, taking deep breaths

Nothing like quiet, to tick off the deaths

Of all those good friends, you used to adore

Who had some odd symptom, they chose to ignore

 

That little black mole, adorning Sue’s cheek

The day Tim went skiing, despite feeling weak

The case of the runs, the blood in Ron’s stool

But you’re here to stay, cause you’re nobody’s fool!

 

So congratulations!

You might be okay.

You’re definitely dying

But perhaps not today!

 

[[bo...]]

Thanks Grandma D ...it sure did mean a lot xx