Health Anxiety

[[wa...]]

Hi -- haven't been here for awhile.  I was doing pretty well -- accepting my chronic health probs which I've probably listed here months ago.

But got a routine Cologuard which came back positive and it's like I'm in acute/dm -- not all day -- just when I started thinking.  I have a colonoscopy scheduled for this week -- not 100% confirmed but I think will happen.  I'm obviously really worried and imagining the worst and my sleep is for s**t.  I'm hoping I am among the false positives.  WBB

[[Be...]]

WBB, I hope it's a false positive too.  That sucks.  Did you have symptoms like bloody or dark stools or colon pain?

[[wa...]]

Hi Becks -- no pain or anything -- I had a lot of pain nausea in early withdrawal and it eventually lifted.  I've been ok since.  I'm thinking inflammation in my bowel.  If I have strong coffee - diarrhea (sorry TMI)  I'm making deals with God, though. 

[[Be...]]

WBB, keep us posted ok?  Praying for you.  That would cause me anxiety.

[[bo...]]

WBB.. jeepers. No wonder your HA has skyrocketed ... I do hope all works out ok.. keep us posted. Will be thinking of you . A colonoscopy procedure would scare the living daylights out of me ...I can certainly feel your anxiety .. lots of love and blessing xxx

[[2t...]]

Hi wannabebetter, I dont post much anymore but just saw your post and wanted to say that I am wishing you a good result from your upcoming procedure.

 

 

2trusting

[[Fa...]]

I have been taking Ativan on and off (usually for a few

months at a time, usually 1 or 1.5 mg per day)over

the last 10 years or so.  I just read about the studies

linking Benzo to Dementia, and that has set off a

major crisis. Since I first read about that  a week

ago, I have pretty much not been able to function

normally. I first tried to just stop, which I was able

to do in the past, and that led to a panic attack.

Now, I want to taper, but I’m afraid to do so. The

only way I can be calm enough to eat is by taking

the very drug that is causing me the anxiety to

take-what an irony. Could anyone offer any comments,

help, etc. I really would like my life back.

[[Ne...]]

Hi Faith,

 

You definitely have my sympathies as far as the Ativan goes! I first started taking it for flight anxiety back in 2015, and didn't connect the dots about the fact that it causes rebound anxiety/panic for me (even in standard, acute doses) until a couple years later when I needed it about every other day for a few weeks. Came off and was instantly hit with what felt like a complete psychotic breakdown-- I remember crying on my kitchen floor in the middle of the day, feeling like I couldn't do ANYTHING.

 

I wound out doing a fairly fast taper, since I hadn't been using it continuously. I only used it for flying until a severe bout of anxiety this past summer, and my psychiatrist put me on daily Valium for several months which I'm trying to come off now  These drugs, no matter what anyone says, tend to be difficult to kick.

 

Everybody is different, so what works for me may not work for you; that being said, you could look at the Ashton Manual (https://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/)-- I'm sure you've heard about it before. If you can't cross over to a longer acting benzo like Valium, or don't tolerate Valium well, just go slowly with the taper. You aren't going to get dementia tomorrow, or next week, or next year. Promise. Take the taper at a speed you can handle. I've been able to cut anywhere between 10-25% of my current dose every 10-14 days. However, it's YOUR body, so the timing may be different, and there's no reason to go with an arbitrary timeline. My suggestion would be to try a modest (but perhaps brave) cut--maybe .25 mg--and see how you feel. You're probably going to feel withdrawal symptoms, but be patient with yourself. Continue on that dose and wait until the symptoms subside, then make another cut of the same size or even less. The lower you go during a taper in terms of dose, the more your body tends to feel the reductions, particularly after long term use.

 

The most important things, for me, have been:

a) Once I make a dose reduction, I don't go back up in dose, even if the withdrawals feel lousy. If I can ride them out, things settle.

b) Don't lower the dose until withdrawal symptoms ease up. Once I feel pretty much stable again, that's when I make another cut.

c) Occasional melatonin or doxylamine help me sleep if I'm getting insomnia from withdrawal. However, your body gets used to both of those pretty easily, and the less drugs in your system, the better.

d) I knocked off caffeine for a long portion of the beginning of my taper, and only recently started drinking some again. Try to stay away from any stimulants until you feel like your body is doing okay with reductions in dosage.

e) Know that it's going to be okay. I know that's really hard in the moment (I deal with panic/GAD/OCD/PTSD), but you are stronger than withdrawal from any stupid pill someone gave you. Just be patient and kind to yourself. Talk to the people that love you and be honest about what you're going through, and know that people are here to support you as well!!!

 

Hugs,

 

NeedingHope

[[Fa...]]

Thanks for the encouragement, Needinghope.

I am just in a crisis/panic mode from reading about

the Benzo-Dementia link. Any thoughts on that?

[[Ne...]]

Sure! As a hypochondriac, I do much more research than I should concerning health issues. One of the things that I have learned is that, while studies can be illuminating and interesting, they are often very limited in their scope (specific populations, small sample size, skewed meta-data, etc). So, while dementia/cognitive problems have been linked to benzos, that doesn’t mean that everyone who has ever taken a benzo (even long term) will have that happen. I understand the panic spiral— “I know it doesn’t happen to everyone, but I feel sure it’s going to happen to ME!”. Realize those aren’t facts, those are fears. Your brain is in fight or flight mode and wants to justify that by recognizing a threat, rather than realizing it just needs time to recalibrate. Does that make sense?

[[Fa...]]

NeedingHope- That makes a lot of sense. Thanks so

much for your excellent insight, and for taking the time

to share it. I look forward to more down the road.

 

[[wa...]]

Hi wannabebetter, I dont post much anymore but just saw your post and wanted to say that I am wishing you a good result from your upcoming procedure.

 

 

2trusting

 

Thnx all - I forgot I posted this issue here as well as a couple of other places.

The colonoscopy showed a single polyp that proved to be benign.  The waiting for pathology lab was agony.  Can't believe medicine in US is still so slow.  The doc said that many positive Cologuards show presence of polyps that can become cancerous.  I wouldn't bother with a Cologuard since there is a percentage of false negatives.  I think folks should just get a colonoscopy if they're over fifty and feeling well enough to do one.

I'm hoping I get over this minor wave I'm in.  WBB

[[Mk...]]

Count me in! I've had this problem forever. Seems to have gotten worse since I tapered and finished taper. Every ache and pain is cancer. My spouse gets tired of listening I'm sure so I try not to tell him my new concerns over a disease I've convinced myself I have. It's kinda a joke to friends that know I do this. I roll with the joke in order not seem so crazy. I don't even want to know the how much of my life I've wasted with worry.

[[Ro...]]

Bringing this bad boy back to life! Reading all of these things gives

Me reassurance that it is a BAD wave on month 8 and I’m not dying!!!!! Because let me tell you, every muscle spasm, headache, mole, and back ache are surely going to put me in the hospital regardless of the validity of my minds claim!!! How are all of you in this club doing?

[[Hi...]]

Do you guys find NOT googling or looking up symptoms helps with your fears or makes it worse?

 

[[Ro...]]

BUMP again. I’m back in a wave have picky skin, night sweats, leg weakness cog fog, all intermittently. It’s not constant and it hasn’t been here in a month or so. I have been taking progesterone for my reoccurring miscarriages and I think that when I stopped it because I didn’t get pregnant that I’m WD because of it. I also think that my yearly physical/blood work as well as my infertility appointment today has me crazy anxious and these symptoms started on Monday. I’m a healthy 32 year old despite my CNS damage. I have no underlying health conditions, no family history of cancer (except my grandpa when he was 93 was diagnosed with bladder CA) I just keep trying to remind myself of that. I think I’m just freaking myself out.  Any helpful words or reassurance would be lovely because I’m losing my mind. Having a hard time working today because of this. I’m hoping if/when I get a clean bill of health these symptoms will subside. They are worse in the morning and during the middle of the night right now. But after 2pm until about 11pm I’m normal. It’s so scary and frustrating. I’m almost 14 months out.