Health Anxiety

[[li...]]

I'm back to laughing at myself today, what a difference a few days can make. My sleep has been better, and that helps a lot. Goes to show you how nonlinear this process can be. One day I feel like a kook and other days I am normal. 

[[fi...]]

Hello friends - I'm really struggling with large painful lymph nodes in the back of my neck and a terrible welt like rash all over my neck, chest and scalp - the only thing that helps the rash is days on end of cortisone cream - can't keep doing this

 

My t3 (thyroid) is low and medications are not bringing it up

 

anyone have any experience with this? I'm a MESS

[[bo...]]

Hi Fight.. these are the same symptons you had back in November? Have they been there all the time or have they gone away and come back . Sounds like a terrible time for you.. is it any use going back to the doctor for reassurance..? Sorry I can't  offer more. Fighting my own demans at the moment .. take care my  friend BBx

[[fi...]]

Hi BB - yes, its still all the same and worse in a lot of ways - i'm so frustrated - just hoping if i keep posting - someone will see it and say "YES - I HAD EXACTLY THE SAME THINGS" Dermatologist thinks the rash is thyroid related - internist doesnt think my thyroid is that bad - and i'm going back today or tomorrow to have these lymph nodes looked at again......i'm so frustrated and so sick of being sick

 

may try crossing back to klonipin - bc what i'm doing is NOT working

[[bo...]]

I do get that.. for me it's the insomnia , and while I know others struggle with this too it's just getting harder and harder to drag myself through each day ..without thinking it's some other problem .. of course lack of sleep effects so many other parts of your life..it's hidieous ...

So I can  relate to the extent of having the same symptons that drive you crazy and no one has a resolution .. for you it's also the added thing of who else has these symptons.. crazy crazy crazy ..xx

 

 

[[fi...]]

I went to the Dr today - my primary - he checked my lymph nodes again and said he thought they were in response to the rash - "why the rash" he had no clue! I know its my thyroid - but he did allergy testing on me - nothing like being over tested yet under tested all at once!

 

I do feel better - I said to him "Just make sure I don't have a heart attack or stroke - please don't screen  me for anything subjective" (Auto Immune) "just hold my hand through this and please get my thyroid working" and he was really nice about it

 

So now that I'm not so self absorbed - I went back and read through other posts here and I see a lot of people have been suffering through the holidays -

 

this is a lonely road = thats for sure, Grandma - and "health anxiety" is actually a listed symptom for Benzo Withdrawal - and no wonder - right? With all the bizarre symptoms that no Dr will acknowledge as withdrawal related.......

 

BB - I had horrific insomnia during following my failed taper - it was the most horrendous thing I've ever been through - I didnt look at your signature but do you take anything to help with that? Personally I think I will take ANYTHING with the exception of a Benzo or Z drug to sleep when I need it - I just feel like we need sleep to heal - but I know many toughen through it

 

WBB - You have a lot of support here - I'm sending you (((HUGS)))

 

We should all reread Bluepill's Dr. Seuss spoof above - its really funny - makes me laugh every time I read it -

[[bo...]]

I do take a z drug to help with sleep even tho it doesn't seem to do much .. I try to keep to only a quarter of a tab, and not increase. I will not even think about weaning off that until the Ativan is done with..I seem to go into that semi state of sleep where it's not really sleep but just in between.. hate it.. try to relax and tell myself that it is better than nothing at all but it isn't really !

 

[[fi...]]

When i tapered last time and was in horrific withdrawal but didnt know it was withdrawal - I started taking Ambien - I only got about an hours sleep out of it - maybe two - and I think it hindered my recovery and made my sxs much worse - bc its so short acting and similar - I was able to just quit the ambien ct (not sure how) when i was accidentally reinstated on benzo in Er and realized it was the taper that was causing all my horrific symptoms (thought i was losing my mind as did my husband and dr's)

 

so now i take Doxipin if needed or melatonin or benadryl........

have you considered talking to your Dr about adding something for sleep thats longer acting?

 

You need to sleep BB

[[Gr...]]

 

So now that I'm not so self absorbed - I went back and read through other posts here and I see a lot of people have been suffering through the holidays -

 

this is a lonely road = thats for sure, Grandma - and "health anxiety" is actually a listed symptom for Benzo Withdrawal - and no wonder - right? With all the bizarre symptoms that no Dr will acknowledge as withdrawal related.......

 

[We should all reread Bluepill's Dr. Seuss spoof above - its really funny - makes me laugh every time I read it -

 

I didn't know that! But I'm not surprised. 

[[2t...]]

So I had to change primary doctors as my old doctor left the practice.

Went to see the new doc and he did lots of blood tests, nothing really bad but some things that I need to watch and try to lower.

One thing that has come to light and I am having an ultrasound next week for is he said my liver is a little inflamed.

This has got me worried and made my anxiety levels increase (I am tapering from klonopin) has anyone else had this sort of thing? I am also on a PPI and wondered if this could have any affect?

It would appear that I have been getting all the normal withdrawal symptoms during my taper.

Prior to July 2015 when I was prescribed klonopin for anxiety due to a medical diagnosis things like this would not have freaked me but since I have been tapering klonopin everything seems to put me on high alert.

 

Thanks for any replys

[[bo...]]

Hi there's 2 trusting...

indeed .. can so relate ( as can every one else here) with the high alert. It's ridiculous ...I had fatty liver deposits in my scan results and worried about all sorts of things.. tried to just work out what was in my control to change and what wasn't ... so much easier said than done..

realistically my age and medical history will predispose me to that ,  but like you the mind always goes to the worst senario ...

I think we are all on a much higher alert than before.. I read on here somewhere that someone said health anxiety was a sx of withdrawal , although I have not personally seen that mentioned specifically anywhere .. 

all the best BB

 

[[Gr...]]

I'm always on high alert too. I've tried to explain it to others, but it's just not explainable. But - THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

 

[[2t...]]

Thank you BB and Grandma for the reply.

He did say in his note to me that it was probably a fat uptake but as you both have said we seem predisposed to thinking the worst, in my case I was put on klonopin to "take the edge off" while I was waiting for the results from a radiation treatment 14 months ago. As it happens the treatments were a success so should have toughed the 2 months wait out.

I'm sure I will be ok but this drug has changed me from a devil may care person to a quivering wimp.

I will get my life back this year though.

[[Ch...]]

Lately I have had not just health anxiety but existential anxiety - a real fear of death. The slew of celebrity deaths over Xmas really freaked me out.

 

I have anxiety about anxiety and quite possibly GAD - Generalised Anxiety Disorder. That's my guess. Not medical diagnosis.

[[fi...]]

see link below - Hypochondriasis is listed as withdrawal symptom

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benzodiazepine_withdrawal_syndrome

 

:smitten:

[[bo...]]

Lately I have had not just health anxiety but existential anxiety - a real fear of death. The slew of celebrity deaths over Xmas really freaked me out.

 

I have anxiety about anxiety and quite possibly GAD - Generalised Anxiety Disorder. That's my guess. Not medical diagnosis.

 

 

Yes yes yes ..! Existential anxiety .. I didn't like to mention it.. the morning is my favourite time .. I didn't die in the night ! Goodness knows why I think

I won't die in the morning either !! You have made me feel not alone with that ..thankyou

[[Bu...]]

I'm definitely having that existential fear right now too.  My GI symptoms are off the charts and I'm losing weight again.  I really hope it's health anxiety over withdrawal symptoms but fear it's pre-benzo GI issues returning with a vengeance.  So very afraid... :'( :'( :'(  Sorry to vent, thanks for reading.

[[Gr...]]

I'm definitely having that existential fear right now too.  My GI symptoms are off the charts and I'm losing weight again.  I really hope it's health anxiety over withdrawal symptoms but fear it's pre-benzo GI issues returning with a vengeance.  So very afraid... :'( :'( :'(  Sorry to vent, thanks for reading.

 

Vent any time and any where BO. We all are here for you. Health anxiety causes such weird symptoms - I think it's what you have going on. Give it time and see if things change. 

[[bo...]]

I agree with all Grandma D says.. vent any time you like.. we all need to do that. And I agree it's more than likely health anxiety  ! Hidieous xx

[[wa...]]

So I still have the upper resp thing -- red sore throat - glands swollen - sinus pain,etc.  Unrelenting and feeling run down.  So I went to GP who barely examined me and gave me amoxicillin  - which is not on the list of "don't take" antibiotics for benzo.  But I am freaked out about taking it because I already feel so lousy and wondering will I feel worse.  Every day has been the same since 12/23/16.  No change at all.  The depression is killer from feeling this way. 

Of course I scour the forum about ampicillin and read mixed reactions.  I have a weak immune system my whole adult life so I feel like I can't get on top of this thing myself.  Getting scared.    WBB

[[Re...]]

So I still have the upper resp thing -- red sore throat - glands swollen - sinus pain,etc.  Unrelenting and feeling run down.  So I went to GP who barely examined me and gave me ampicillin - which is not on the list of "don't take" antibiotics for benzo.  But I am freaked out about taking it because I already feel so lousy and wondering will I feel worse.  Every day has been the same since 12/23/16.  No change at all.  The depression is killer from feeling this way. 

Of course I scour the forum about ampicillin and read mixed reactions.  I have a weak immune system my whole adult life so I feel like I can't get on top of this thing myself.  Getting scared.    WBB

 

What was the doctors diagnosis?

[[Ki...]]

Wanna - did the doctor actually diagnose you with bacterial infection? Did he take a swab of your throat? I understand your reluctance at taking an AB, I have the same fears, but if you have a legitimate infection you need to be treated. Likely you are feeling so terrible because of the virus/bacteria itself and you will feel better once you take AB.

 

There are mixed reactions on the forum in regards to AB but everyone who took one survived...try and focus on that. They may have had an uptick in sx but that could also have been from the infection. I had a terrible virus in December as well and all my w/d sx were made worse by it.

 

Please let us know how you make out. Thinking of you

[[wa...]]

Thnx all for the input.  She said it was not strep (in the past - every time I demand a swab for strep it's neg) and that with the length of time I've and these sxs and the pain in my sinus -- time to treat it with one of the antibiotics that covers most of these infections.  I have yet to find a doc that will culture anything but suspected strep.  Even my ENT person i had to demand a sinus swab last time this happened.  In reality - culture of sinuses should be done in surgery (which I had 3 years ago).

 

Back then I had alot of sinus mucous indicating some common bac infection and I took a nasal spray antibio ( muporicin/gentanicin)which didn't work -- this year is is just alot of redness, sensitivity and pain with post nasal drip but no appreciable stuff (like green stuff) - and low fevers.  I usually ride these out but this isn't budging. I can't take most antibiotics now due benzo hx and having c-diff many years ago.  I think by this weekend, amoxicillin is a gamble I am willing to take, I'm so miserable.  WBB

 

( NOt ampicillin  Amoxicillin)

[[Re...]]

Thnx all for the input.  She said it was not strep (in the past - every time I demand a swab for strep it's neg) and that with the length of time I've and these sxs and the pain in my sinus -- time to treat it with one of the antibiotics that covers most of these infections.  I have yet to find a doc that will culture anything but suspected strep.  Even my ENT person i had to demand a sinus swab last time this happened.  In reality - culture of sinuses should be down in surgery (which I had 3 years ago).

 

Back then I had alot of sinus mucous indicating some common bac infection and I took a nasal spray antibio which didn't work -- this year is is just alot of redness, sensitivity and pain with post nasal drip but no appreciable stuff (like green stuff) - low fevers.  I usually rid these out but this isn't budging. I can't take most antibiotics now due benzo hx and having c-diff many years ago.  I think by this weekend, ampicillin is  a gamble I am willing to take, I'm so miserable.  WBB

 

I really don't think you should take a ab if you aren't even certain you need one. I have had all those symptoms for a while they come and go stil. I even have swolllen lymphnnodes stilll.  There are a lot of stories on here of people in the same situation as you taking ab and it not even helping the symptoms you described . It is your body and you know it best though. Just my opinion . Hope all goes well for you .

[[bo...]]

Wanna.. please please  reconsider the AB's .. totally get why you don't want to take them but if it really is a true infection you are dicing with danger . Other things happen beside our benzo sx in our bodies , and infections are dangerous if they take hold..

I have had to have a course of AB 's during the tapering and yes they did cause an uptick in sx , but they soon settled again .. good luck with your decision ..