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After the Ball is over . . .
Finally completed this painting. It's in watercolors again, so it's hard for me to work the petals and leaves into anything with more translucence. I'll try the concept in oils one day, maybe. But I got it done!
There's an artist's practice that I have to start doing again. You give yourself a very limited amount of time to draw something. Then shorten the time and shorten until you've only got a few seconds. It loosens your wrist and makes your drawing or painting flow and have clean, simple, honest movement. I look at this current watercolor and know I haven't been practicing!
I'm going to try, though. Now that the flower ball is over, I have to find something else to start, stat!!
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Last Words Of A Shooting Star
I wish I had something better to update you guys with. But I just don't. It's been a real struggle. Why did I ever touch an SSRI again? Everything was going... well, not great. But manageable. My anxiety was high, despite being on 45mg Mirtazapine, and I added Citalopram to it. Barely anything. And yet since, my life has gone off the rails. Badly.
I stopped taking it, but I've been living in windows and waves, annoyingly. Maybe the waves aren't as destructive as they were in the first week or two. I thought I was out of the woods, had a good week or so with only little bits of anxiety, then it struck again big time. Went to ER. They gave me two temazepam. Bad choice.Windows and waves since. Reading has been the only thing keeping me going really.
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Latest Entry
Hello old friends...
Posting my first blog just to say hello to any and all old (and new) friends.
I guess our old blogs are archived and will be phased out eventually? Has anyone found a way to save their old blogs, perhaps save them offline. It serves as record of the past 6 years of my life so it might be nice to save for future reference.
Anyway! I hope everyone is hanging in there and finding their way on the new site. It took me so long to fugue out the old one, so I imagine it will take me awhile to figure this one out too! But as I always said...I am not going anywhere. I might be logged off for awhile as I have been getting busier and more capable but I am still here for anyone who would like to reach out.
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Latest Entry
Blogging on the new BB forum
I have been in two minds about whether to continue to blog or not. I have been on BB for such a long time, since 2014 in fact. Why am I still here? The reasons are simple, I continue to live with the long term effects of a benzo brain injury and I have made some good friends on this website. Not only that I have acquired a whole family of virtual critters who inhabit my blog, in fact they think it belongs to them. They will appear now and again, of that I am sure.
You can read about my history here.
https://benzobuddies.org/profile/238407-[lo...]/?tab=field_core_pfield_1
Old blog is here.
It is over 10 years since I completed my taper, I had no idea what was in front of me. Most of us are in the same boat. It has been a very long journey, the journey continues. I have come a long way from being virtually bedridden, however I am still chronically tired and am limited in what I can do in any one day, many days I do very little and have to spend quite a bit of time resting and recovering after being out of the house, meeting friends etc. Hopefully I can work out how to use this new blogging system. As well as being on BenzoBuddies I have been very active in campaigning about benzo and antidepressant harms, I have been on Twitter since 2014. I have been on TV and in the press. I now take life a bit easier and don't do any more interviews. I am tired. I will see how this new blog goes, it isn't so easy to adapt to change now.
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Latest Entry
90 months, my recovery
I just want to see if it works. And some music if you want to dance!
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