Family triggering Withdrawal Symptoms

[[Tw...]]

Please help. My adult son and my husband are triggering my anxiety and my withdrawal symptoms. I quit benzodiazepines 7 weeks ago. I am trying all of my positive coping skills, and they usually help, but nothing is helping me right now. It is nighttime now, and I strongly fear that I may not sleep. I am very fragile due to quitting benzodiazepines 7 weeks ago. I cannot tolerate too much stress. I cannot work or drive yet due to the benzodiazepine withdrawals. I am 100 percent financially dependent on my husband, and he is yelling now that he refuses to buy me food to survive. What do I do ? 

[[Tw...]]

Just now, [[T...] said:

Please help. My adult son and my husband are triggering my anxiety and my withdrawal symptoms. I quit benzodiazepines 7 weeks ago. I am trying all of my positive coping skills, and they usually help, but nothing is helping me right now. It is nighttime now, and I strongly fear that I may not sleep. I am very fragile due to quitting benzodiazepines 7 weeks ago. I cannot tolerate too much stress. I cannot work or drive yet due to the benzodiazepine withdrawals. I am 100 percent financially dependent on my husband, and he is yelling now that he refuses to buy me food to survive. What do I do ? 

 

[[Tw...]]

Please any feedback or suggestions would greatly be appreciated 

[[Tw...]]

Is anyone there? I feel so alone. 

[[Le...]]

wow. why is your husband being so unsupportive?

[[Le...]]

does he know nothing about what happens when people come off these things?  he needs to be informed. would he watch videos?

[[Le...]]

can you throw me a few details about what you were prescribed and how long?

[[Ca...]]

Sorry I sent you a message.....could not figure out how to reply to the chat.....can you take a warm shower and/or eat something with protein and carbs? We have all been through this. You are not alone.

[[Bo...]]

Do you have family or friend that is a place you can go that’s whiter and that they will help you oit?

I am so sorry. I hate this for you, it’s such a rough time at this stage and need slO the support you can get. 
anywhere you can think that you could stay for a month or two and be calmer and better for your nervous system?

I hate the threats being made….. might show your husband and son this. If they are unwilling to educate themselves on this , then trying to find somewhere to be for someone that is safe for you as you get thru the next couple months might be the better so your system isn’t frazzled by the stress of your husband and son.

 

[[Tw...]]

1 hour ago, [[B...] said:

Do you have family or friend that is a place you can go that’s whiter and that they will help you oit?

I am so sorry. I hate this for you, it’s such a rough time at this stage and need slO the support you can get. 
anywhere you can think that you could stay for a month or two and be calmer and better for your nervous system?

I hate the threats being made….. might show your husband and son this. If they are unwilling to educate themselves on this , then trying to find somewhere to be for someone that is safe for you as you get thru the next couple months might be the better so your system isn’t frazzled by the stress of your husband and son.

Thank you all for your support and feedback. My husband and adult son have knowledge of how hard it is to come off of benzodiazepines. 

It is now 1am and I cannot sleep at all. I haven't had insomnia for 30 days. I feel like I am backwards. Today my husband and I had a horrible visit verbal fight and my anxiety will not go away. I checked on homeless shelters for my town. I found a women's shelter who would take me. I have no income. I can't work due to all of the withdrawal symptoms. 

[[Tw...]]

What do y'all do to cope with a mountain of enormous stress? I can't sleep at all. It's very scary. I can't work because after quitting benzodiazepines, I cannot even trust my body to sleep. 

[[En...]]

I find people do not understand what we are going through. I am sorry you are having this issue. I too have that same issue with my spouse. She went through a similar issue about 10 years ago and I wasn't as supportive as I should have been either. Now that I am in a similar issue and ask her for support she brings up how I treated her while she was going through this. People cannot see are imagine what we are going through until they go through it themselves. They cannot  see the damage done to our brains. It's not like a broken bone that people can see. What I do is rely on myself to get through this and this website helps a lot too. We have and are going through what you are going through and understand what you are going through. Your husband does not understand to the extent we need support. I told my wife she is adding to my stress and if she wants this to get better I need her support. I also got a therapist I could talk to over the phone as I didnt want to leave my house. Talk therapy can help but it can also be triggering. I found it did help a bit but was also triggering. Un fortunately only time will help us heal. I  believe you are very close to starting to get better in month 3. Just hang in there and be patient. If you find you try to talk to your husband about this and it only ticks him off dont talk to him about how you feel. He doesn't understand. Find inner strength and find a different outlet for support. I found stopping talking to my wife about what I am going through helped her stop talking to me about how bad I was when she went through this. We are not perfect. 

[[Le...]]

i have had a similar discussion with many people. There is no way for someone to understand or even believe this is possible without going through it. trying to get through to them will only make it harder. find understanding here. 

[[or...]]

 

Call a helpline for abused women first of all, or a friend you know is "safe" if you have one.  I didn't have anyone to help me when I did a CT many years before I got to BB. In fact I was living in a shelter with an abusive assistant manager.  To me she was the devil incarnate, and I feared for my life.

I was either darn lucky or there is a God that got me through. I had no one basically, that knew me, or cared for me around.  I feared everything, and everyone.  I prayed a lot and I'm not a religious person.  I just believe there is something, or someone that loves me, still, to this day, oregonlady

Edited May 7 by [or...]

[[Tw...]]

Thank y'all for all of your feedback and suggestions. Your input is extremely helpful. I appreciate all of you. 

[[Al...]]

2 hours ago, [[o...] said:

Call a helpline for abused women first of all, or a friend you know is "safe" if you have one.  I didn't have anyone to help me when I did a CT many years before I got to BB. In fact I was living in a shelter with an abusive assistant manager.  To me she was the devil incarnate, and I feared for my life.

I was either darn lucky or there is a God that got me through. I had no one basically, that knew me, or cared for me around.  I feared everything, and everyone.  I prayed a lot and I'm not a religious person.  I just believe there is something, or someone that loves me, still, to this day, oregonlady

I don't know about this.  First of all, you don't have all the details of what is going on.  It is true that people do not understand without going through it, but maybe OP has been dumping their emotional baggage on their husband and he said that out of frustration?  Why would you give somebody the advice to call an abuse hotline without having all the details?  That seems very irresponsible.

Edited May 7 by [Al...]

[[Al...]]

57 minutes ago, [[T...] said:

Thank y'all for all of your feedback and suggestions. Your input is extremely helpful. I appreciate all of you. 

I am sorry you are going through all of this.  First of all, until we have all the details, I would not suggest calling an abuse hotline.  I need to know a couple of things.  How often have you been leaning on him for support?  This can be a big one that triggers people into saying things they don't mean.  I have had horrible fights with my mom before while going through the motions of w/d (other w/d but still) and realized later that I was leaning on her way too much for support.  You are not alone, and there are other people who can empathize with you.  I would, first of all, turn to either these forums or a therapist and give your husband a few days of space.  Find and engage with a fun hobby that you either currently enjoy or used to enjoy doing.  Take it easy, and try not to be too hard on yourself.  I know it is easier said than done, but while we're having bad anxiety, especially from w/d, our minds are going very fast and it makes it easier for us to make impulsive decisions.  I would write down how you feel onto paper, and enjoy a nice calming tea and watch a show or movie you really like!!

[[En...]]

I find this situation puts a strain on our closest relationships. We are more vulnerable in our state of mind and others do not understand what we are going through. If you are confiding in your husband it is best to stop if he is not being supportive. Our closest relationships take a hit because they are living with us and we need a lot of support to help us get through this. Like I said before try to find an outside source of support such as an outside family member or supportive friend. If you dont have that then talk therapy with a therapist. If you have work insurance they usually have this for you . My work has 10 talk sessions a year. I have used it a few times already. They will know what to do and offer you suggestions. 

Also try not to think negatively about your sleep. You will manifest a bad sleep if you have already made up your mind you will have a bad sleep. Learn how to create a bedtime routine and just before you go to bed think to yourself you are going to have the best sleep of your life. Try taking a warm bath before bed. Maybe read a book or watch a favorite TV show. Try to think positive about bedtime. If you do happen to wake up in the middle of the night get out of bed after 20 minutes of being awake. Go do something relaxing like breathing exercises or read a favourite book. Stay away from screens as they tend to trick the brain it is daylight. 

 

Edited May 7 by [En...]
Added content

[[Tw...]]

2 hours ago, [[E...] said:

I find this situation puts a strain on our closest relationships. We are more vulnerable in our state of mind and others do not understand what we are going through. If you are confiding in your husband it is best to stop if he is not being supportive. Our closest relationships take a hit because they are living with us and we need a lot of support to help us get through this. Like I said before try to find an outside source of support such as an outside family member or supportive friend. If you dont have that then talk therapy with a therapist. If you have work insurance they usually have this for you . My work has 10 talk sessions a year. I have used it a few times already. They will know what to do and offer you suggestions. 

Also try not to think negatively about your sleep. You will manifest a bad sleep if you have already made up your mind you will have a bad sleep. Learn how to create a bedtime routine and just before you go to bed think to yourself you are going to have the best sleep of your life. Try taking a warm bath before bed. Maybe read a book or watch a favorite TV show. Try to think positive about bedtime. If you do happen to wake up in the middle of the night get out of bed after 20 minutes of being awake. Go do something relaxing like breathing exercises or read a favourite book. Stay away from screens as they tend to trick the brain it is daylight. 

@[En...]Thank you for all of your very helpful feedback and suggestions. I deeply appreciate all of your comments and input. 

 

[[Tw...]]

3 hours ago, [[A...] said:

I am sorry you are going through all of this.  First of all, until we have all the details, I would not suggest calling an abuse hotline.  I need to know a couple of things.  How often have you been leaning on him for support?  This can be a big one that triggers people into saying things they don't mean.  I have had horrible fights with my mom before while going through the motions of w/d (other w/d but still) and realized later that I was leaning on her way too much for support.  You are not alone, and there are other people who can empathize with you.  I would, first of all, turn to either these forums or a therapist and give your husband a few days of space.  Find and engage with a fun hobby that you either currently enjoy or used to enjoy doing.  Take it easy, and try not to be too hard on yourself.  I know it is easier said than done, but while we're having bad anxiety, especially from w/d, our minds are going very fast and it makes it easier for us to make impulsive decisions.  I would write down how you feel onto paper, and enjoy a nice calming tea and watch a show or movie you really like!!

@[Al...]I really like all of your advice and suggestions Alot. I will give my husband a few days of space and engage in my hobbies. Excellent 💡 idea ! 

[[or...]]

7 hours ago, [[A...] said:

I don't know about this.  First of all, you don't have all the details of what is going on.  It is true that people do not understand without going through it, but maybe OP has been dumping their emotional baggage on their husband and he said that out of frustration?  Why would you give somebody the advice to call an abuse hotline without having all the details?  That seems very irresponsible.

She'll know if she needs to call for help if she's just dumping her baggage as you say, then she won't need to call but I think that it's good for her to know her options if it's that bad for her to reach out for help and a hotline is for people to talk to that are in a possibly abusive situation at least she knows some options for herself. For all you know she's minimizing what's happening to her so putting out options for her I think is very responsible.

Edited May 7 by [or...]