The Long Hold Support Group

[[4G...]]

Hi Mary. I know what you mean about muscle memory. I was putting shoes on! I've only worn canvas things in the garden for so long!

 

I've just been watching some tv in bed. A guy called Paul O'Grady goes into Battersea Dogs' Home to see the dogs they bring in and their new owners. It's a really cosy programme. I suspect Stut might watch it as I know she loves dogs.

 

Hope all is going okay for you. 

 

Going to do some deep breathing now.... Gulp!

 

Lots of Love, Gilly xxxxx

[[St...]]

Good morning Begood Cant Heath Mary Trish Miyu Bluepill Gard Free Intend NJ SS TMB Green Deep Nova Barbara Olive Ginger Cally Battle Esperanza Anu Gilly Milli Val Hope Let and everyone here hoping everyone has a better day.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[St...]]

Morning Gilly l have everything crossed for you my love.We are all with you and hoping the what if's stay quiet for today.

Good luck.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[St...]]

Morning Lady Mary one more for our DVD that is excellent.Remember get them all written down because we will probably start recording in January.

  Love you my lady Mary.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[St...]]

Morning Trish l am still on the track of a creeper none creepy enough but l still have hope.

  Love you Sis.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[St...]]

Morning Can't this is just a shout out to you hopefully you are holding your own and drop in soon please.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[St...]]

Well folks this is my last full day with my daughter we will pack and then head out for the day.l can't say l am looking forward to going home but l am needed there so will head home tomorrow.Sending you all a healing hug.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[Ma...]]

Morning Lady Mary one more for our DVD that is excellent.Remember get them all written down because we will probably start recording in January.

  Love you my lady Mary.

  Love and hugs Stut X

 

Love you too my Queen, have a good last day with my niece and the pups.  Lady Mary ☮️💜🙏🐕🐶🐱🐾🐾🐾

[[Ma...]]

Good morning Begood Cant Heath Mary Trish Miyu Bluepill Gard Free Intend NJ SS TMB Green Deep Nova Barbara Olive Ginger Cally Battle Esperanza Anu Gilly Milli Val Hope Let and everyone here hoping everyone has a better day.

  Love and hugs Stut X

 

Reading this reminds me of all the people we haven't heard from in a while.  Please post if you can, just a line or too.  We love you .  Good morning to the rest of LHSG, hoping for decent days and maybe something to make you smile.  Mary 🐕🐾🦉🎄🎄🎄☮️💜🙏

[[NJ...]]

Thanks for all the birthday wishes everyone! It has been a tough week ... I just cannot sleep at all ... but it is what it is. All still the same with my son, he is actually being piled with work at school so we haven't seen him much. He does seem to be eating a bit more so fingers crossed this new med he is on will help him heal. He is now off the omeprazole so that is good, seems to be doing fine. We see the doctor next on January 2. Still thinking it is early Crohn's disease although no definitive diagnosis yet. Which is hard to not know but I really hope it isn't Crohn's as it is a terrible disease.

 

Have a good weekend.

[[Ma...]]

Thanks for all the birthday wishes everyone! It has been a tough week ... I just cannot sleep at all ... but it is what it is. All still the same with my son, he is actually being piled with work at school so we haven't seen him much. He does seem to be eating a bit more so fingers crossed this new med he is on will help him heal. He is now off the omeprazole so that is good, seems to be doing fine. We see the doctor next on January 2. Still thinking it is early Crohn's disease although no definitive diagnosis yet. Which is hard to not know but I really hope it isn't Crohn's as it is a terrible disease.

 

Have a good weekend.

 

So glad he's eating more!!  Love you, Mary 🎄💜🙏☮️

[[In...]]

Thanks for all the birthday wishes everyone! It has been a tough week ... I just cannot sleep at all ... but it is what it is. All still the same with my son, he is actually being piled with work at school so we haven't seen him much. He does seem to be eating a bit more so fingers crossed this new med he is on will help him heal. He is now off the omeprazole so that is good, seems to be doing fine. We see the doctor next on January 2. Still thinking it is early Crohn's disease although no definitive diagnosis yet. Which is hard to not know but I really hope it isn't Crohn's as it is a terrible disease.

 

Have a good weekend.

 

Hi NJ.

 

Of course, as you know, you and I have been corresponding on the Teva Discontinued Group. But, nevertheless, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN.  :happybday:

 

And I’m so glad that your son is doing better and busy himself. Perhaps the new medication is making a difference. We had a neighbor who had Crohns also, but perhaps not as difficult as your son. He had mentioned it a couple of times, but we saw him a lot, and it never seemed to affect him. Maybe it happened later in his life; I’m just not sure.

 

Hope your weekend works out well as I know you have several things planned. I’m not sure what I’m going to be doing. Maybe the movies as I mentioned.

[[Ma...]]

Intend, so good to see you here, think of you and Dan a lot.  Let me know about the new tabs, am interested to hear what you think.  Love you and all the kitties.  Valium going to make me take a nap but it is great to see you on here!!

Mary. 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🐱🐱🐱🐾🐾💜

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

[[In...]]

Intend, so good to see you here, think of you and Dan a lot.  Let me know about the new tabs, am interested to hear what you think.  Love you and all the kitties.  Valium going to make me take a nap but it is great to see you on here!!

Mary. 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🐱🐱🐱🐾🐾💜

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Good to see you also Mary. Yep, new tabs. Got lots of questions myself about the liquid taper folks are doing here. Thoughts on the new tabs myself. So much going on right now with my family. I don’t even know where to start.

 

Got to make some phone calls right now. Still have my odd voice, but either the new tabs haven’t fully affected me or they won’t (fingers and toes crossed  🤞) so I’ll make those calls while you rest.

 

🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹  💟💜💛💚💙

 

 

 

[[Su...]]

G' Day LHSG,

Welcome CKK,

Yes the end of the taper needs to be much slower than the beginning of we get tied up in knots!

 

Happy Birthday NJ!  May this next year be better... and better and better..

 

Gilly -- I'm guessing that you'll be able to go if you take good care of yourself and practice good anxiety management.... it could be worth it?

 

Stut and Mary -- the coat tree worked well but you would have been so much more fun!

 

Our party went well!  So many friends and neighbours showed up and were enthusiastic about our wee group.  And then they stayed and stayed and stayed!  There was so much food brought!  and wine and good laughter and joy!

 

I was sure that I would be completely out of it the next day -- but I wasn't!!!!  Really I must say these new supplements are making a world of difference.... I literally could not have done it three months ago.  I'm taking it easy but am very prepared to taper again for another month and see what that is like.  My percentage may possibly go up but it's still within a very conservative number.

I've tapered again now for two nights, as I want to get the ball rolling again.

 

Intend, Trishy, Free BG, and anyone else who is reading here.....

 

We can get through this season folks!  I saw a plate at a shop today that had written on it.

"we're all in this together."  Wanted to get one for all of us here...

 

:smitten:

 

[[Ma...]]

G' Day LHSG,

Welcome CKK,

Yes the end of the taper needs to be much slower than the beginning of we get tied up in knots!

 

Happy Birthday NJ!  May this next year be better... and better and better..

 

Gilly -- I'm guessing that you'll be able to go if you take good care of yourself and practice good anxiety management.... it could be worth it?

 

Stut and Mary -- the coat tree worked well but you would have been so much more fun!

 

Our party went well!  So many friends and neighbours showed up and were enthusiastic about our wee group.  And then they stayed and stayed and stayed!  There was so much food brought!  and wine and good laughter and joy!

 

I was sure that I would be completely out of it the next day -- but I wasn't!!!!  Really I must say these new supplements are making a world of difference.... I literally could not have done it three months ago.  I'm taking it easy but am very prepared to taper again for another month and see what that is like.  My percentage may possibly go up but it's still within a very conservative number.

I've tapered again now for two nights, as I want to get the ball rolling again.

 

Intend, Trishy, Free BG, and anyone else who is reading here.....

 

We can get through this season folks!  I saw a plate at a shop them  today that had written on it.

"we're all in this together."  Wanted to get one for all of us here...

 

:smitten:

 

So glad it all went great SS.  It would have been more fun if I had gathered coats  . I would like to try those supplements, I am just afraid, if it's not wd sxs , then they might aggravate my migraines. I have thought about trying really low dose to see.  I can get them off Amazon, what brand name do you use? Luv ya, Mary 🐱🐱🐾🐾💜🙏☮️🎄🎄🎶🎶🎵

[[Ma...]]

Intend, so good to see you here, think of you and Dan a lot.  Let me know about the new tabs, am interested to hear what you think.  Love you and all the kitties.  Valium going to make me take a nap but it is great to see you on here!!

Mary. 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🐱🐱🐱🐾🐾💜

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Good to see you also Mary. Yep, new tabs. Got lots of questions myself about the liquid taper folks are doing here. Thoughts on the new tabs myself. So much going on right now with my family. I don’t even know where to start.

 

Got to make some phone calls right now. Still have my odd voice, but either the new tabs haven’t fully affected me or they won’t (fingers and toes crossed  🤞) so I’ll make those calls while you rest.

 

🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹  💟💜💛💚💙

 

Just had dinner and am back on if you want to talk 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

[[In...]]

Intend, so good to see you here, think of you and Dan a lot.  Let me know about the new tabs, am interested to hear what you think.  Love you and all the kitties.  Valium going to make me take a nap but it is great to see you on here!!

Mary. 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🐱🐱🐱🐾🐾💜

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Good to see you also Mary. Yep, new tabs. Got lots of questions myself about the liquid taper folks are doing here. Thoughts on the new tabs myself. So much going on right now with my family. I don’t even know where to start.

 

Got to make some phone calls right now. Still have my odd voice, but either the new tabs haven’t fully affected me or they won’t (fingers and toes crossed  🤞) so I’ll make those calls while you rest.

 

🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹  💟💜💛💚💙

 

Just had dinner and am back on if you want to talk 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Mary,

 

I got the orally disintegrating tablets from Teva, and they are still clonazepam.

 

I had a long discussion with builder about this and whether whole fat milk would work as a solvent for these tablets as well as it did for regular tablets of clonazepam, and he said it would work just as well.

 

I asked him why the vodka/method seemed to be the preferred way to microtaper now, and he said it had to do with the easy preparation, the lack of refrigeration needed, the ability to prepare multiple doses that did not need refrigeration, and the ability to take doses with you when you needed to. All of this thread is still on the titration board.

 

I have debated about trying this method for myself, but I’ve used the milk for a very long time, and I’m just not sure how my CNS would respond. I know the milk has always worked for me. If it didn’t, I wouldn’t have felt those w/d effects from the times I have tapered.

 

I just want to be very careful with these particular tabs. Just wasn’t sure if they would or not. But I felt very reassured that they would work the same as any regular tab of clonazepam.

 

I even got on BB at my pdocs appt on December 5th to show him my discussion with builder. He commented that it was good to know that lorazepam needed either PG or drinking alcohol 🍷 🍺 in order to be tapered. He has many patients who are on lorazepam, and if they do fine on it, he’s fine with that. But tapering is a different story. He’s done a lot of dry cut tapers before, but not microtapers. We just work together, and he says he’s learned a lot from me.

 

Dans thumb is much better, and we stopped the bandaging about 2 weeks ago. It’s still sensitive but so much better than it was. Interestingly, we’ve had several others in this neighborhood who’ve done the same thing to their thumbs also. One neighbor cut his thumb in half the same day as Dan did, and last week, another neighbors son cut his entire thumb off completely. And so everyone, be very careful of these power saws. That kid had to go into surgery for hours to reattach nerves and muscles. His mom came over and said he was very upset that they cut all his new Carharts right down the middle when they got him in the ER. Well, for anyone that doesn’t know, Cartharts are thick clothing that people wear to work in the cold, and his dad has a deck construction company that goes all year round.

 

And I’m going to save the family stuff for another post. 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹💟💜❤️🧡💛💚💙

 

Well basically, have not heard a word from my younger daughter, Cathy, even though I know she got out of lockup several weeks ago, and other daughter now wants to move to Sacramento to be with this Brad/bumble guy. Absolute worst holiday season Dan and I have ever had. Grandson Blake doesn’t like it either. Presents several problems for all of us. A lot of semi-arguing going on around here.

[[4G...]]

Hello Everyone. Just reporting in on today at my daughter's. It was very difficult, but I managed to go. The journey there was really hard. I was having horrible intrusive thoughts almost all the way there. When we arrived, Rebecca met up with us and showed me and Dave the flat. Then we had the buffet and played Bingo and Charades. I had two glasses of wine. I know it is a depressant but it's not as depressing as feeling stressed out all day and not being able to join in. My Mum had sorted out some Bingo prizes and that was good. Geoff, my Mum's partner, is very kind to me. And Rebecca's boyfriend, Kris, is lovely. So that was the six of us.

 

So now I am lying on my bed and I don't know how to feel. The thing I have dreaded since October is done. I think I'll end up having a big cry. The relief is massive and yet there's a hollow feeling somehow.

 

Stut, I want to thank you for being there, as you are for all of us. You're a Star. SS, I really appreciate your kind words and advice. Thank you so much. As for the Deadly Duo of D's, you guys are wonderful. You are always there and I just really want to say that all you guys are The Best.

 

Don't know what to do now. Guess I'd better go and mix up my V....

 

Lots of Love, Gilly xxxxx

 

 

[[Ma...]]

Intend, so good to see you here, think of you and Dan a lot.  Let me know about the new tabs, am interested to hear what you think.  Love you and all the kitties.  Valium going to make me take a nap but it is great to see you on here!!

Mary. 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🐱🐱🐱🐾🐾💜

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Good to see you also Mary. Yep, new tabs. Got lots of questions myself about the liquid taper folks are doing here. Thoughts on the new tabs myself. So much going on right now with my family. I don’t even know where to start.

 

Got to make some phone calls right now. Still have my odd voice, but either the new tabs haven’t fully affected me or they won’t (fingers and toes crossed  🤞) so I’ll make those calls while you rest.

 

🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹  💟💜💛💚💙

 

Just had dinner and am back on if you want to talk 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Mary,

 

I got the orally disintegrating tablets from Teva, and they are still clonazepam.

 

I had a long discussion with builder about this and whether whole fat milk would work as a solvent for these tablets as well as it did for regular tablets of clonazepam, and he said it would work just as well.

 

I asked him why the vodka/method seemed to be the preferred way to microtaper now, and he said it had to do with the easy preparation, the lack of refrigeration needed, the ability to prepare multiple doses that did not need refrigeration, and the ability to take doses with you when you needed to. All of this thread is still on the titration board.

 

I have debated about trying this method for myself, but I’ve used the milk for a very long time, and I’m just not sure how my CNS would respond. I know the milk has always worked for me. If it didn’t, I wouldn’t have felt those w/d effects from the times I have tapered.

 

I just want to be very careful with these particular tabs. Just wasn’t sure if they would or not. But I felt very reassured that they would work the same as any regular tab of clonazepam.

 

I even got on BB at my pdocs appt on December 5th to show him my discussion with builder. He commented that it was good to know that lorazepam needed either PG or drinking alcohol 🍷 🍺 in order to be tapered. He has many patients who are on lorazepam, and if they do fine on it, he’s fine with that. But tapering is a different story. He’s done a lot of dry cut tapers before, but not microtapers. We just work together, and he says he’s learned a lot from me.

 

Dans thumb is much better, and we stopped the bandaging about 2 weeks ago. It’s still sensitive but so much better than it was. Interestingly, we’ve had several others in this neighborhood who’ve done the same thing to their thumbs also. One neighbor cut his thumb in half the same day as Dan did, and last week, another neighbors son cut his entire thumb off completely. And so everyone, be very careful of these power saws. That kid had to go into surgery for hours to reattach nerves and muscles. His mom came over and said he was very upset that they cut all his new Carharts right down the middle when they got him in the ER. Well, for anyone that doesn’t know, Cartharts are thick clothing that people wear to work in the cold, and his dad has a deck construction company that goes all year round.

 

And I’m going to save the family stuff for another post. 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹💟💜❤️🧡💛💚💙

 

Well basically, have not heard a word from my younger daughter, Cathy, even though I know she got out of lockup several weeks ago, and other daughter now wants to move to Sacramento to be with this Brad/bumble guy. Absolute worst holiday season Dan and I have ever had. Grandson Blake doesn’t like it either. Presents several problems for all of us. A lot of semi-arguing going on around here.

Intend, so good to see you here, think of you and Dan a lot.  Let me know about the new tabs, am interested to hear what you think.  Love you and all the kitties.  Valium going to make me take a nap but it is great to see you on here!!

Mary. 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🐱🐱🐱🐾🐾💜

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Good to see you also Mary. Yep, new tabs. Got lots of questions myself about the liquid taper folks are doing here. Thoughts on the new tabs myself. So much going on right now with my family. I don’t even know where to start.

 

Got to make some phone calls right now. Still have my odd voice, but either the new tabs haven’t fully affected me or they won’t (fingers and toes crossed  🤞) so I’ll make those calls while you rest.

 

🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹  💟💜💛💚💙

 

Just had dinner and am back on if you want to talk 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

Mary,

 

I got the orally disintegrating tablets from Teva, and they are still clonazepam.

 

I had a long discussion with builder about this and whether whole fat milk would work as a solvent for these tablets as well as it did for regular tablets of clonazepam, and he said it would work just as well.

 

I asked him why the vodka/method seemed to be the preferred way to microtaper now, and he said it had to do with the easy preparation, the lack of refrigeration needed, the ability to prepare multiple doses that did not need refrigeration, and the ability to take doses with you when you needed to. All of this thread is still on the titration board.

 

I have debated about trying this method for myself, but I’ve used the milk for a very long time, and I’m just not sure how my CNS would respond. I know the milk has always worked for me. If it didn’t, I wouldn’t have felt those w/d effects from the times I have tapered.

 

I just want to be very careful with these particular tabs. Just wasn’t sure if they would or not. But I felt very reassured that they would work the same as any regular tab of clonazepam.

 

I even got on BB at my pdocs appt on December 5th to show him my discussion with builder. He commented that it was good to know that lorazepam needed either PG or drinking alcohol 🍷 🍺 in order to be tapered. He has many patients who are on lorazepam, and if they do fine on it, he’s fine with that. But tapering is a different story. He’s done a lot of dry cut tapers before, but not microtapers. We just work together, and he says he’s learned a lot from me.

 

Dans thumb is much better, and we stopped the bandaging about 2 weeks ago. It’s still sensitive but so much better than it was. Interestingly, we’ve had several others in this neighborhood who’ve done the same thing to their thumbs also. One neighbor cut his thumb in half the same day as Dan did, and last week, another neighbors son cut his entire thumb off completely. And so everyone, be very careful of these power saws. That kid had to go into surgery for hours to reattach nerves and muscles. His mom came over and said he was very upset that they cut all his new Carharts right down the middle when they got him in the ER. Well, for anyone that doesn’t know, Cartharts are thick clothing that people wear to work in the cold, and his dad has a deck construction company that goes all year round.

 

And I’m going to save the family stuff for another post. 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹💟💜❤️🧡💛💚💙

 

Well basically, have not heard a word from my younger daughter, Cathy, even though I know she got out of lockup several weeks ago, and other daughter now wants to move to Sacramento to be with this Brad/bumble guy. Absolute worst holiday season Dan and I have ever had. Grandson Blake doesn’t like it either. Presents several problems for all of us. A lot of semi-arguing going on around here.

 

I am so glad you found the tabs.  I use milk too, I just can't imagine vodka and benzo taste together, it just sounds awful.  I would stick to the milk, which is what they were pushing when I first came on bb.  I think I might sneak out in garage and hide Tim's saw . Family problems at the holidays always suck, so sorry.  Have you set a date to start the crossover or just going to let the holidays go by?  They are so close now, I think I would just wait.  I hate to ask, what about the kitties?  That breaks my heart and I know it does yours and Dan's.  I read your posts on the Teva thread, so I keep an eye on you. 👀. Keep me updated on how the tabs are going, that would be wonderful if it helps you and can help others going through the generic issues.  Love you Intend, tell Dan I said hi !  Mary 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

 

[[4G...]]

Hi Intend. I know you addressed the last post to Mary, but I just wanted to say how sorry I am that you are having family problems. This is such an emotional time of year. Things just escalate and nobody wins. Make every attempt you possibly can to have some "me time". Hope things improve soon. Glad that Dan's thumb is getting better.  Gilly xxx

[[In...]]

Mary,

 

My responses keep getting “trapped” inside all the quoting, so no quoting for this response.

 

I’ve already started on the ODTS. It’s 8 days today. I figure I can’t afford to waste anymore time.

 

I never start tapering any new tablet of any kind or generic brand w/o giving myself plenty of time to get used to it, and let my CNS “settle down.” So I’m taking it along with the Actavis Clonazapam, and about a week from now, I’ll substitute the Actavis for another series of ODTS. So no tapering for me right now. And when I’m fully on the ODTS, I’ll do a long hold.

 

As far as those kitties, Mary will be going back to Sacramento the day after Christmas 🎄.

 

And we’ll be taking care of them for again for 8 days. To be honest, we just want this whole thing to be over and done with. So tired of hearing how rich Brad is. She spoke with a recruiter from the Sacramento area this morning to help her find an executive position. And Brad wants to look at these “gorgeous “ new houses close by. Says he wants to buy her a brand new car like a Mercedes.

 

And my little Pepperkins is laying in front of our gas fire right now. I just hate the thought of Pino and Elsa 🐱 🐱 being alone again. I can only try to accept all this. Seems somewhat stupid or silly as he is determined to retire back here in Salt Lake in a little over 7 years. And then he plans on doing consulting when he retires.

 

Seriously affects our estate planning I guess. Just worn out debating everything with her. ☹️ 😞

[[In...]]

Hi Intend. I know you addressed the last post to Mary, but I just wanted to say how sorry I am that you are having family problems. This is such an emotional time of year. Things just escalate and nobody wins. Make every attempt you possibly can to have some "me time". Hope things improve soon. Glad that Dan's thumb is getting better.  Gilly xxx

 

Hi 4G.

 

Yes it is troubling to be having these kind of problems at this time of the year. I know you’ve been having your own problems. Is this happening to all of us or what?

 

I’ve always said the US has too many holidays, and I truly believe that. Just any excuse to not work. It’s just our culture I suppose. Or I should say it’s just me.

 

“Me Time” involves keeping occupied and busy, and it seems like I’m always busy doing something, but all these changes of clonazepam (6 now) have affected me. When I stopped working, I planned on teaching again. It was supposed to be teaching English to immigrants and refugees as a volunteer.

 

All that came to a screeching halt when I had to continuously change generics of clonazepam over and over again. I’d just get ready to taper again, and then was forced to change generic brands.

 

This LHSG is set up perfectly for me. That’s about all I’ve done for quite awhile now. Sure does get in the way of doing any volunteering. Don’t feel very motivated either.

 

Glad you went to your daughters tonight. Sounds like it worked out well. Glad you and Dave got out.

 

🌹 🥀 🌹🎵🎶🎵

 

Forgot about Tilly. We all love our kitties 🐱. Glad you have her.

[[St...]]

Good morning Begood Cant Heath Mary Trish Miyu Bluepill Gard Free Intend NJ SS TMB Green Deep Nova Barbara Olive Ginger Cally Battle Esperanza Anu Gilly Milli Val Hope Let and everyone here hoping everyone has a better Saturday thinking of you all.

  Love and hugs Stut X

[[St...]]

Morning Gilly what an achievement that is a middle finger up to anxiety and depression.l know you feel strange and the next few days you will feel deflated etc however l am here to say l am proud of you girl and so is your daughter and mum.

  Love to you my lovely and a big hug as well you deserve it.

  Love and hugs Stut X