An experience like no other

[[ma...]]

Thank you PJ for all your caring & inspiring words.

As you know, it helps so much.

My new mantra is "Benzo WD doesn't last forever..."

Thank you

 

margaretisabel

 

I love your new Mantra Margaretisobel, it is so true I promise you it will get better

 

 

I've been busier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

 

PJ I love this quote..I have no clue what it means, I just love it

 

 

[[Fl...]]

It's uniquely Texas, I think Margo. I grew up hearing it. Just think of a long-tailed cat in a room with rocking chairs going back and forth...there's no place to rest and let your tail splay out like cats will do. 

[[ma...]]

It's uniquely Texas, I think Margo. I grew up hearing it. Just think of a long-tailed cat in a room with rocking chairs going back and forth...there's no place to rest and let your tail splay out like cats will do. 

 

 

Got It!!  thank you for explaining that to me dear Flip, I love your Texan expressions. 

[[Fl...]]

 

Me, too, Margo.

[[...]]

Gee Whiz, so many nice responses from so many nice people.  Thanks, and a big ol' hug to all you wonderful folks.

 

Taking a short coffee break here, so it's a good time for me to thank you all for your kind words.  Thank you.

 

I've always liked the cat and the rocking chair analogy when describing how busy a person can become.  It reminds me of how hectic life's situations can be at times.

 

You know ... when the benzos have released you from their powerful hold, and you are healed, you are like a totally different person in so many different ways.  It is almost like you have been reborn.

 

There was a time when the benzos could probably have convinced you that the beauty of the rose was not the petal ... but the thorn ... or that the man in the moon was real, and he dined on green cheese. 

 

Being healed and drug free clears your mind so you can see things as they really are, not in the distorted way the benzos would have you see them.

 

Being healed and drug free, you no longer believe that you are stuck forever in situations that you do not want to be in. You realize that you have the power to change things in our life, just like you had the power to stop taking benzos. 

 

Yes, all that I have described, really does happen when you are healed. 

 

You guys have a pleasant summer evening sitting on the front porch with your loved ones, enjoying the good times in your life. 

 

pj

 

I had to come back and re-write a lot of this post because I was in a hurry, and it didn't make much sense. 

[[...]]

Hi patty,

 

Sorry I didn't acknowledge your post sooner, but I've been busier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

 

Within a few minutes after my head hits the pillow I am sound asleep ... a far cry from when, during withdrawals, I would sometimes lie awake all night, my mind racing faster than Secretariat ... on his way to winning the Triple Crown.

 

Many nights before nodding off, I think of the folks who haven't healed yet.

 

Sometimes I feel a little guilty because I am feeling so good and doing so well. 

 

But that guilty feeling doesn't last too long, cause I know in my heart that the day will come when everyone will be healed, and they will be feeling just as good as I do and they will be doing just as well or even better than I am.

 

I've been singing the same old song about healing and happiness for a  very long time now,

because that is what I believe.  I truly believe that everybody recovers, and when they do - happiness, contentment and an inner peace become as much a part of their life as the air they breathe.   

 

There were many days when I felt the same way that some of  the guys who have not yet healed must be feeling at times.  Just like them, I thought I would never heal.  I thought I would forever have those withdrawal symptoms.

 

I felt lost.  I felt confused and I felt lonely - just like them - I was scared.

 

You kind folks who are patiently waiting to be healed - write a note to yourself with the words, " withdrawals don't last forever" scrawled on it ... tuck that note in your pocket or inside your shoe ... look at it several times a day, and before you know it ... you will have healed,

 

because, patty, as you know ... your husband Ron, and the thousands of other fine folks who have recovered can attest to the fact that it is indeed true ... 

 

"Withdrawals don't last forever!" 

 

Blessings to you and everyone, patty.

 

pj

 

PJ, i love your posts , don't ever feel guilty, we are ever so grateful

for coming back and giving hope, bless you.

 

Thank you, Claudia.  Bless you, too.

 

I have some free time now, so I wanted to thank you all individually.  Your responses are much appreciated, even though it may not seem like they are, because it sometimes takes me so long to respond back.

 

pj

 

 

[[...]]

Hey PJ and Claudia,

 

I think it is survivor's guilt.....When I am feeling better, I stay away from BB...When I am feeling worse, I come running back to BB....

I know eventually I will heal, because I am so much better now than I was even 3 months ago...

One day I will come back and write a success story and one day this will all be a bad memory of a very hard time.

I am not sure how I will feel about it in the future...

but I know i am going to be very grateful to never take another Benzo and not worry about walking across a room...

 

Thanks so much for coming back and encouraging us PJ...

I will try to be like you when I am healed and come back to help and encourage those still in it...

i guess this is the true "paying it forward".

 

Love and healing,

Causing

 

Hi C P,

 

'Survivor's guilt' ... is such a common, and natural emotion for folks to feel when they have avoided a major tragedy or ... when it comes to withdrawals ... they are doing so much better or they have healed - while others in withdrawals are still hurting and still suffering. 

 

After you have completely recovered, and you have written your success story, it will be so helpful and so reassuring to others folks to have your support and  your understanding.  I applaud you for wanting to come back and 'pay it forward' once you have healed.

 

Support and reassurance are the two things folks can't get enough of when they are going through the hurt and confusion of withdrawals.

 

The very best to you.

 

pj 

[[...]]

Thank you PJ for all your caring & inspiring words.

As you know, it helps so much.

My new mantra is "Benzo WD doesn't last forever..."

Thank you

 

margaretisabel

 

Hi margaretisabel,

 

Thank you.  I like your new mantra, because it's true and honest ... indeed, withdrawals 'do not last forever'

 

Have a safe, happy and carefree summer.

 

pj

.   

[[...]]

Thank-you PJ. I am starting to feel much better/healing. Wishing you the best as always! You are very special!  .

 

HI Jazzy!!! I'm so happy to hear you are feeling better, much better. There is nothing but more healing ahead of you. 

 

PJ, what a treasure you are to offer so much hope from your heart.  A long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.  What a picture that brings to mind. 

 

I know what you mean about busy days,  what a change from our withdrawal days. 

 

PG

 

Hi pianogirl,

 

The saying actually is: more 'nervous' than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.  But being busier than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs could make a person pretty nervous, too 

 

Enjoy the summer

 

pj

[[...]]

It's uniquely Texas, I think Margo. I grew up hearing it. Just think of a long-tailed cat in a room with rocking chairs going back and forth...there's no place to rest and let your tail splay out like cats will do. 

 

Thank you Flip, for explaining about the long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.  It most likely is a Texas witticism.  Just like you Okie's, those Texans are pretty witty.

 

Enjoy those beautiful Oklahoman evenings. 

 

pj

 

[[lo...]]

Hi PJ

 

It is wonderful that you are now better.  It gives us all hope, even belief at times.

 

I think this experience makes us more understanding , more caring etc.  We have so many symptoms we can empathise with everyone elses' s symptoms, outside BB I mean!!!!

 

I would have preferred not to go through this but it may be worth it if I get to feel really well again.

 

LF

 

[[...]]

Hi LF,

 

Thank you.  You're right, this experience does indeed make us more caring and more compassionate towards others.  By walking a mile in another person's shoes, we come to realize just how weary and trying someone's life can be - especially during withdrawals.

 

The very best to you

 

pj

 

 

[[...]]

Hi folks,

 

I received a PM from a new member who had some questions and concerns. 

With her permission, I took the liberty of posting that PM and my response to her on this thread. 

 

By doing so, I am hoping that others who are new here, looking for encouragement and understanding, will find validation for their withdrawals, because their doctor may have tried to convince them that it was impossible for them to be having withdrawals from drugs like Ambien and Benzodiazepines.

 

I had one of those doctors, as did many of you guys.  We did not imagine or pretend that we had all those symptoms.  We would have to be an Oscar winner to pull that off.   

 

 

Hi PJ, I just read your success story and wanted to tell you that you have given me hope, when I needed it the most. I CT from ambien 3.5 months ago after taking it nightly 10mg for 2 years. I am suffering with harsh WDs; physical ( neuropathic pain, burning entire body, numbness hands, feet, head, pins and needles, tight bandage like sensation around midsection, vibrations, tinnitus, back pain, and mentally; anxiety and panic, afraid to be alone.

 

I never sufered from anxiety and panic until my CT. I never took any other drug except ambien, I don't even drink. My doctors do not recognize ambien WDs being the cause of my symptoms. I have given up on trying to convince them. I have lost my job because of this. Thank goodness, my husband is very supportive.>

 

But what I wanted to know is this, you said complete healing was 15 months. Did you notice if the mental sxs left before the physical? What was your recovery % along the way? How were you at 3 months vs 6 months? When did the burning sensatons go away? Did you ever take neurontin? (I am now tapering off of it, because I do not think it has helped with the neuropathic pain)

 

Thanks so much for your help, I really appreciate it, cindy

 

 

Hi Cindy,

 

Most doctors do not believe that the painful, confusing, and long- lasting withdrawals that many folks experience from Ambien or Benzodiazepines are possible.  But Cindy, you and I, and thousands of other folks know differently, because ...

we have suffered through the burning, the itching, and the numbness.  We know that 'pins and needles' feeling all too well.  We know what it is like to be scared all the time or what it is like to have anxiety all day long, and sometimes all night long - because we could not fall asleep.

 

Like you have, I also gave up on trying to convince my doctor that I was having withdrawals.   

 

If you had NONE of the symptoms that you are now experiencing BEFORE you ever took the Ambien, you can rest assured that you indeed are having withdrawals as a direct result of your encounter with Ambien.

 

My mental symptoms ( the fear of dying and the fear of being alone) left before the physical symptoms did.  I'm trying to recall just how long the burning lasted.  I think it was completely gone by five or six months.

 

The first two or three months after my cold turkey, I didn't notice much improvement in my many withdrawal symptoms.  After three month, things began to change.  Little by little - month by month, I saw improvement.  Finally, after fifteen months - both physically and mentally, I felt like a whole new person.

 

I did not take Neurontin or any other substance.  When I was desperate for sleep, I took Benadryl a couple of times.  After that I didn't take any other OTC or prescribed drugs, because by then, I realized that TIME is what it took for me, and for everyone else to heal.

 

I felt that by taking other drugs, it would just confuse an already confused brain even more and compound my bodies effort to heal itself from the damage caused by the Ativan and the Ambien that I had been prescribed ( with no information given to me by my doctor on the consequences of taking those mind-altering and body changing drugs).   

 

Try to be patient, and accepting ( not the easiest thing do, I know )  Try to distract yourself by taking walks and meditating.  Doing these things will help ease your anxiety, and help you to realize that you indeed are going to recover from this nightmare.  And Cindy ... you will recover from this insanity. 

 

You will get your life back, and yes, you will be happy and productive again.

 

I am sorry that you lost your job because of the withdrawals.  With the support of your husband ... which is so very kind of him ...  and your determination to get through this, you will find another job. 

 

You are going to emerge from this experience, a much wiser and a much happier woman.  In my heart, I Just know that you will.

 

Peace and happiness to you.

 

pj

 

 

[[63...]]

Hi folks,

 

I received a PM from a new member who had some questions and concerns. 

With her permission, I took the liberty of posting that PM and my response to her on this thread. 

 

By doing so, I am hoping that others who are new here, looking for encouragement and understanding, will find validation for their withdrawals, because their doctor may have tried to convince them that it was impossible for them to be having withdrawals from drugs like Ambien and Benzodiazepines.

 

I had one of those doctors, as did many of you guys.  We did not imagine or pretend that we had all those symptoms.  We would have to be an Oscar winner to pull that off.   

 

 

Hi PJ, I just read your success story and wanted to tell you that you have given me hope, when I needed it the most. I CT from ambien 3.5 months ago after taking it nightly 10mg for 2 years. I am suffering with harsh WDs; physical ( neuropathic pain, burning entire body, numbness hands, feet, head, pins and needles, tight bandage like sensation around midsection, vibrations, tinnitus, back pain, and mentally; anxiety and panic, afraid to be alone.

 

I never sufered from anxiety and panic until my CT. I never took any other drug except ambien, I don't even drink. My doctors do not recognize ambien WDs being the cause of my symptoms. I have given up on trying to convince them. I have lost my job because of this. Thank goodness, my husband is very supportive.>

 

But what I wanted to know is this, you said complete healing was 15 months. Did you notice if the mental sxs left before the physical? What was your recovery % along the way? How were you at 3 months vs 6 months? When did the burning sensatons go away? Did you ever take neurontin? (I am now tapering off of it, because I do not think it has helped with the neuropathic pain)

 

Thanks so much for your help, I really appreciate it, cindy

 

 

Hi Cindy,

 

Most doctors do not believe that the painful, confusing, and long- lasting withdrawals that many folks experience from Ambien or Benzodiazepines are possible.  But Cindy, you and I, and thousands of other folks know differently, because ...

we have suffered through the burning, the itching, and the numbness.  We know that 'pins and needles' feeling all too well.  We know what it is like to be scared all the time or what it is like to have anxiety all day long, and sometimes all night long - because we could not fall asleep.

 

Like you have, I also gave up on trying to convince my doctor that I was having withdrawals.   

 

If you had NONE of the symptoms that you are now experiencing BEFORE you ever took the Ambien, you can rest assured that you indeed are having withdrawals as a direct result of your encounter with Ambien.

 

My mental symptoms ( the fear of dying and the fear of being alone) left before the physical symptoms did.  I'm trying to recall just how long the burning lasted.  I think it was completely gone by five or six months.

 

The first two or three months after my cold turkey, I didn't notice much improvement in my many withdrawal symptoms.  After three month, things began to change.  Little by little - month by month, I saw improvement.  Finally, after fifteen months - both physically and mentally, I felt like a whole new person.

 

I did not take Neurontin or any other substance.  When I was desperate for sleep, I took Benadryl a couple of times.  After that I didn't take any other OTC or prescribed drugs, because by then, I realized that TIME is what it took for me, and for everyone else to heal.

 

I felt that by taking other drugs, it would just confuse an already confused brain even more and compound my bodies effort to heal itself from the damage caused by the Ativan and the Ambien that I had been prescribed ( with no information given to me by my doctor on the consequences of taking those mind-altering and body changing drugs).   

 

Try to be patient, and accepting ( not the easiest thing do, I know )  Try to distract yourself by taking walks and meditating.  Doing these things will help ease your anxiety, and help you to realize that you indeed are going to recover from this nightmare.  And Cindy ... you will recover from this insanity. 

 

You will get your life back, and yes, you will be happy and productive again.

 

I am sorry that you lost your job because of the withdrawals.  With the support of your husband ... which is so very kind of him ...  and your determination to get through this, you will find another job. 

 

You are going to emerge from this experience, a much wiser and a much happier woman.  In my heart, I Just know that you will.

 

Peace and happiness to you.

 

pj

 

A huge thank you to Cindy and to you, PJ, for posting this as it really helps give hope to those of us who are still in withdrawal. Also, huge thanks to you, PJ,  for coming back after being healed and sharing your experiences, giving us encouragement, -you have no idea how helpful it is (well actually, you probably do).

[[Ga...]]

Dear PJ

Its so wonderful to read your posts.  Your answer to Cindy was so supportive and encouraging and such super advice,but, then, that's what you do.  And your advise about other drugs and about time being our only healer is correct.  But you have always been right on as well as so supportive.  You have such a kind heart...I've missed you.  And it was nice to see positive posts from the ladies who are also great support...causing, piano girl, margarita ,margaretisabel...all familiar names from when I first came on BB many months ago.  it warms my heart to see improvement and healing from them.  as you are always telling us, we all will heal, are healing.  It's just hard to remember that when we are suffering.

 

Like Causing, I run here when I am bad.  I have had some great days, not Perfect but very tolerable and have been getting out, driving again, seeing friends.  But two day ago I got hit with some new sxs of very bad heartburn, palpitations, spasms, chest ache, upper tummy hurt.  I am confused by these sxs because I have changed my diet and am eating so much healthier.  It's very scary but I know it's  probably my anxiety issues acting out in my tummy , not heart issues.  But I thought I would stop by and see if you come back once in awhile and so I see you do.  thank you so much.  I just celebrated my one year anniversary and had so hoped I would be healed by now but, not to be I guess.

 

So glad you are busy doing what you love and that you and your pal doggie are doing well.  My hubby  and my two dogs are my anchor, my support, my reason to go on with this suffering.  I'm so devastated to be hit again but...it's the way it is.  I am trying to distract, I walk every day.  I am able to read again so am doing that.  Its just so hard to be positive, to not be fearful.  I try. 

 

thanks again for stopping by when you can.  We all so appreciate you, dear friend.  Peace, love and God Bless. 

Galea

[[...]]

Thank you Robert,

 

I wish you the very best.

 

pj

[[...]]

Hi Galea,

 

It's so nice to hear from you again.  I show up here whenever someone has posted a question or a comment to me.  I'm never too busy not to answer them.  It's very early in the morning, and it's raining, so it's a good time to write a few words to you, my friend.

 

I'm sorry that you had a set back.  You are trying to do all the right things and you still have unpleasant things happening to you.  That's the way benzos like to torture us.  Just remember that, given enough time, you will feel as good as you did before you even knew what a benzo was.   

 

It's only been a year for you, Galea.  I know that it seems like a lifetime, but the average healing time from benzos is eighteen months, so you are well over half way to the finish line.

 

When you cross that line, you will awaken to a new and  exciting life.  A life that you have been dreaming about.  A life where you can do all the things that you want to do without worrying or second guessing yourself.  You can live again, the way you were meant to.   

 

I think one of the secrets to unlocking, and freeing our inner self to be all that we can be, is to do the things that  makes us happy.  We shouldn't be afraid to be different or to try new things.  Too much emphasize is put on lifestyles. 

 

Sometimes I wonder if it makes all that much difference what we eat. It seems that some folks eat nothing but so called junk food and they are as healthy as the proverbial horse or they are happier than a teacher on the last day of school. 

 

Eating healthy is good, but occasionally a person should eat whatever it is that they want to eat.  There is a reason why certain foods are called 'comfort foods'.

 

What would make most folks happier?  Eating a big ol' slab of nondescript Tofu or a big slice of colorful Key Lime Pie ... My vote is for the pie.

 

I want to share with you one of my strangest withdrawal symptoms.  A long while back, I didn't notice that the right side of my mustache was hardly growing at all, while the left side was growing as usual.  I was at the county fair with some of my neighbors when their seven year old looked at me ever so curiously, and asked: "why is only half of your mustache growing?"  I just laughed and told the precocious kid that I keep forgetting to water the other half. 

 

When I got back home I shaved the mustache off.  When I started growing it again, it came in nicely on both sides  the way it's supposed to.  It's a mystery to me what caused my mustache to only grow on one side.  It had to be because of the benzos. 

 

"The Case of The Half-Missing Mustache" ... what a great title for a Sherlock Holmes tale. 

 

Benzos can affect us in the strangest and most unusual ways.  So a person has to expect, and accept the unexpected.  Just when you think you have seen it all, the benzos do the weirdest things to us.

 

Take care and be happy.  Soon all your days will be good days.

 

 

pj

[[pr...]]

Hi PJ,

 

i just noticed today that my eyebrows grew on the left side (kinda in the middle) and there wasn't any hair at all on the right side.  i mean, i have eyebrows on the right side -- just not right in the middle like it was -- just more to the left. it was so weird. so yes, i do think it's benzo related the one sided hair growing versus the other side not anything at all.

 

Love, Pretty

[[ca...]]

I am so glad you both brought that up.

 

About 2-3 months ago I was looking in the mirror....No on is symmetrical, but I am pretty that after 55 years of living in my body I know my symmetrical and asymmetrical parts.....

The hair along side my temple on the right looked thicker than the left side...it just appeared uneven suddenly to me.

 

It still looks uneven, but not as much as it did...I am hoping it grows out and the hair comes back along the hairline.

6 months ago this would have been another horrible thing...now it is just something that has happened and will either get better or not...the main thing at this point is to not hurt...and to be functional...

I have that hope more and more lately...

Things are slowly starting to break up...

I hope it continues like this.

 

Much love and healing,

Causing

[[...]]

Hi PJ,

 

i just noticed today that my eyebrows grew on the left side (kinda in the middle) and there wasn't any hair at all on the right side.  i mean, i have eyebrows on the right side -- just not right in the middle like it was -- just more to the left. it was so weird. so yes, i do think it's benzo related the one sided hair growing versus the other side not anything at all.

 

Love, Pretty

 

Hi prettydaisys,

 

I hope everything in your life is going okay and that any withdrawals you may still be suffering from are not as severe as I know they once were.

 

Me, with my half a mustache and you, with your eyebrows all askew could have been featured in a Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head commercial. 

Those doggone benzos are indeed the 'Frankenstein' of all drugs. 

 

Peace and happiness to you. 

 

Enjoy the summer, prettydaisys.  It sure seems to be going by mighty fast.

 

pj

[[...]]

I am so glad you both brought that up.

 

About 2-3 months ago I was looking in the mirror....No on is symmetrical, but I am pretty that after 55 years of living in my body I know my symmetrical and asymmetrical parts.....

The hair along side my temple on the right looked thicker than the left side...it just appeared uneven suddenly to me.

 

It still looks uneven, but not as much as it did...I am hoping it grows out and the hair comes back along the hairline.

6 months ago this would have been another horrible thing...now it is just something that has happened and will either get better or not...the main thing at this point is to not hurt...and to be functional...

I have that hope more and more lately...

Things are slowly starting to break up...

I hope it continues like this.

 

Much love and healing,

Causing

 

Hi causing

 

It's nice to read that you are getting better.  That is indeed good news.  I'm sure your hair will grow back ... equally on both sides, and be as beautiful as it used to be.

 

I don't know about you, but the majority of my withdrawal  symptoms occurred on my right side.  The twitching eyelid ( really hated that one ) the shoulder pain, most of the electric shocks and nerve pain, muscle tightening, along with the mustache issue, all on the right side.  Bizarre, that's for sure.

 

You take care.  I wish you continued healing.

 

pj

[[Ja...]]

PJ that is really funny. The "Frankenstein" of all drugs. What a great description. How true. My nerve pain/burning pain is reduced somewhat, but still comes and goes, driving me crazy. All else is gone or is bearable. Love that you come back to respond to posts. I wish you a wonderful summer. Summer is truly my favorite time of the year. 

[[pr...]]

Causing and Jazzy,

 

it's so good to hear that things are breaking up and improving for the both of you. i guess it's happening with me too. although still need lot's of rest.

 

PJ,

 

this life has gone to fast and now with benzo's taking almost all of it i want it back -- NOW!

 

love from Prettydaisys

[[Ja...]]

Happy for you pretty. Would like to see us all heal and be done with this crazy journey.

[[...]]

PJ that is really funny. The "Frankenstein" of all drugs. What a great description. How true. My nerve pain/burning pain is reduced somewhat, but still comes and goes, driving me crazy. All else is gone or is bearable. Love that you come back to respond to posts. I wish you a wonderful summer. Summer is truly my favorite time of the year. 

 

 

Hi Jazzy,

 

I had benzo rage once and when it ended, I really did feel like the benzos had turned me into a Frankenstein monster because it was so out of character for me to act like I did. 

 

My dog took one look at me and scurried beneath the bed.  He had always seen me as a quiet, kind of a gentle type of a man.  When I calmed down, we went for a long walk, and all was right with the world again.

 

Jazzy, summer is my favorite time of the year, too.

 

It makes me happy to know that you are improving ... good for you.  I hope all your summers are memorable and very special for you, so you are left with many beautiful memories that will make all your winters quickly change back into summer again.

 

The best to you.

 

pj

 

 

Here is one of my favorite poems by James Russell Lowell where he talks about all the mysteries, the miracles, and the wonders of summer, as he saw them a long, long time ago.

 

It's five-thirty in the morning.  I'm listening to the songbirds serenade me as I enjoy my daily - one cup of coffee.

 

Perhaps you will like this poem as much as I do.

 

And what is so rare as a day in June?

Then, if ever, come perfect days;

Then Heaven tries earth if it be in tune,

And over it softly her warm ear lays;

Whether we look, or whether we listen,

We hear life murmur, or see it glisten;

 

Every clod feels a stir of might,

An instinct within it that reaches and towers,

And, groping blindly above it for light,

Climbs to a soul in grass and flowers;

The flush of life may well be seen

Thrilling back over hills and valleys;

The cowslip startles in meadows green,

The buttercup catches the sun in its chalice,

And there's never a leaf nor a blade too mean

To be some happy creature's palace;

 

The little bird sits at his door in the sun,

Atilt like a blossom among the leaves,

And lets his illumined being o'errun

With the deluge of summer it receives;

His mate feels the eggs beneath her wings,

And the heart in her dumb breast flutters and sings;

He sings to the wide world, and she to her nest,

In the nice ear of Nature which song is the best?

 

Now is the high-tide of the year,

And whatever of life hath ebbed away

Comes flooding back with a ripply cheer,

Into every bare inlet and creek and bay;

Now the heart is so full that a drop overfills it,

We are happy now because God wills it;

No matter how barren the past may have been,

'Tis enough for us now that the leaves are green;

 

We sit in the warm shade and feel right well

How the sap creeps up and the blossoms swell;

We may shut our eyes but we cannot help knowing

That skies are clear and grass is growing;

The breeze comes whispering in our ear,

That dandelions are blossoming near,

That maize has sprouted, that streams are flowing,

That the river is bluer than the sky,

That the robin is plastering his house hard by;

And if the breeze kept the good news back,

For our couriers we should not lack;

We could guess it all by yon heifer's lowing,

And hark! How clear bold chanticleer,

Warmed with the new wine of the year,

Tells all in his lusty crowing!

 

Joy comes, grief goes, we know not how;

Everything is happy now,

Everything is upward striving;

'Tis as easy now for the heart to be true

As for grass to be green or skies to be blue,

'Tis for the natural way of living:

Who knows whither the clouds have fled?

In the unscarred heaven they leave not wake,

And the eyes forget the tears they have shed,

The heart forgets its sorrow and ache;

The soul partakes the season's youth,

And the sulphurous rifts of passion and woe

Lie deep 'neath a silence pure and smooth,

Like burnt-out craters healed with snow