An experience like no other

[[...]]

Hi sunny girl,

 

Thank you for those kind words.  I knew that you were a very special lady when I first became acquainted with you a long, long time ago on the poetry thread.

 

I always looked forward to your stopping by my place and sharing a cup or two of Earl Gray tea with you.  During those pleasant conversations, we had no deadlines to meet, no schedules to keep or no floors to sweep. 

 

That's the way life should be sometimes.  Once a month, everyone should take a 'mental health day' ...  a day away from their 'same old', 'same old', daily routine.  Doing whatever it is they want to do, doing whatever makes them happy - with no deadlines to meet, no schedules to keep or no floors to sweep.

 

Just because we are adults, we do not have to stop dreaming, stop having fun or stop walking barefoot in the grass. 

 

To be truly happy, a person has to be who and what they are ... doing what they know in their heart is the right thing for them to do.  If we live our life for someone else, at the expense and degradation of our own life,

happiness will elude us, and an emptiness deeper than the deepest ocean will forever linger in our heart. 

 

I will always remember your visits to me in my humble little house located in cyber land ... the house along the creek, near the big woods - half way to Heaven, where we sipped tea and shared stories from our childhood.

 

You take good care of yourself.   

 

Your friend

 

pj 

[[Co...]]

Dear Pj, heard you were leaving and had to come say goodbye...I hate goodbyes...so I will just say so long and thank you...you are such a special person...so wise and caring, and above all so generous...I'm so honored to have shared some of this experience with you...be well, love, Colleen

[[...]]

Thank you Colleen,

 

I am no more special than you or any of the other folks are, who became members of this unique site.  We all came here for the understanding and for the guidance needed for us to be able to overcome all the ways in which benzo withdrawals has deleteriously impacted our individual lives.

 

All of us have had to be very strong-willed and very determined in order to survive the daily onslaught of pain and confusion that the withdrawals caused us to endure for such a long time.

 

All of us have had to be extremely patient while waiting for that first window to open for us ... temporarily releasing us from the strong hold that the benzos had on us.  That first window gave us, for a brief moment, a glimpse of what it would be like when we were healed.  What a glorious feeling that was.

 

But, what seemed quicker than 'in the blink of an eye' that window soon closed,

 

and all of us had to be sturdier, and much stronger than a battleship in order to survive all those waves, that followed the closing of that window, relentlessly testing what we were made of. 

 

With the encouragement, the understanding, and the love of all the kind and decent folks on this site, such as yourself, everyone's goal to become completely healed and benzo free will be realized ... healing will not be just a wish or a dream.  Healing will become a reality.

 

Give that gentle giant of the dog world, your magnificent Great Dane, a shout out from me.

 

The best of the best to you.

 

pj

 

 

I hope all you folks who are in need of a laugh on this fine Saturday morning, laugh as hard as I did when I read what you are about to read.

 

I mean no disrespect to Hillbillies, to women or to folks who reside in the South.  Some of my best friends are Hillbillies and women who live in the South. The following, was emailed to me by one of those fine, upstanding citizens.

 

 

Never Choke In A Restaurant

In The South!

 

Two Hillbillies walked

into a restaurant.  While

having a bite to eat,

they talked about their

moonshine operation.

 

Suddenly, a woman at

a nearby table who is

eating a sandwich,

began to cough. 

 

After a minute or so, it

became apparent that

she was in real

distress.

 

One of the Hillbillies

looked at her and said,

"Kin ya swallar?"

 

The woman shook

her head no,

 

Then he asked, "Kin ya

breathe?"

 

The woman began to turn

blue and shook

her head no.

 

The Hillbilly walked

over to the woman,

lifted up her dress,

yanked down her

drawers, and quickly

gave her right butt

cheek a lick with his

tongue.

 

The woman was so

shocked that she had a

violent spasm, and the

obstruction flew out of

her mouth.

 

As she began to

breath again, the

Hillbilly walked slowly

back to his table.

 

His partner said,"Ya

know, I'd heerd of that

there 'Hind Lick

Maneuver, but I ain't

never seed nobody do

It!"

 

I read where Clint Eastwood saved someone's life by doing the Heimlich Maneuver on a diner who was choking on a piece of cheese in a Pebble Beach restaurant.  Most of us cannot afford to dine in a Pebble Beach restaurant, but we also cannot afford not to learn how to do the Heimlich Maneuver.

 

Have a nice day.  If you celebrate it, have a nice Easter Sunday tomorrow

[[pa...]]

OMG PJ..... :laugh: :laugh: I cannot stop! Lol lol....You've made my day!

 

 

[[...]]

Hi there pattylu,

 

I'm glad the story about the 'Hind Lick Maneuver' made you laugh.  When a friend of mine, who lives in a rural mountainous region of Appalachia, Emailed it to me, I laughed harder, and longer than I had in a very long time.  I was in kind of a silly mood that day, so reading that Email from Matt pushed me over the edge and started me on a non-stop laughing jag that lasted for almost five minutes.

 

I hope all is well with you, pattylu. I wish you and Ron much peace and happiness. 

 

pj

 

 

[[...]]

Happy Mother's Day to all you wonderful, caring, and brave mothers who are dealing with withdrawals and still manage to do your best when it comes to taking care of your children - taking care of them with all the love and tenderness that only a mother can fully understand and appreciate.

 

Although you are in pain, and you may be consumed with self-doubt and worry, you still manage to be the best mother that you can possibly be.

 

Being a mother is not easy under the best of circumstances.  Being a mother when withdrawals have turned your world upside down ... well, that's something else again.  You are to be commended for your strength, your devotion, and your patience. 

 

You do not have to be a Super Mom ... just be a regular kind of mom.  Your kids will love you no matter what, because you are their Mom ... and they love you. 

 

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.  She never existed before. 

The woman existed, but the mother, never.  A mother is something absolutely new. ~Rajneesh.

[[Mo...]]

How thoughtful of you PJ, thanks for always returning back,  nice one.

[[fl...]]

You brought a tear to this mother's eye.  Thank you so much, PJ.  Needed to hear this today.

[[be...]]

What a wonderful and inspirational story. Thank you so much for sharing. You should be very proud of yourself. You have come so far......healed. Awesome!

[[...]]

How thoughtful of you PJ, thanks for always returning back,  nice one.

 

Hi there

 

I wish I could be here more often, but for the foreseeable future, my commitments dictate that I will be working between twelve and fourteen hours a day,  but I will never be too tired to respond to someone who has taken the time to post on this thread.

 

Although you have not yet written your success story, you, and all the other kind folks are doing a wonderful job of encouraging others to be strong and to hang in there until the day comes when you all will be writing your own success stories. 

 

Those folks, not yet healed, need to be constantly reminded, and reassured that they are going to recover.

 

pj 

[[...]]

You brought a tear to this mother's eye.  Thank you so much, PJ.  Needed to hear this today.

 

Hi floc

 

The plight of some mothers brings a tear to my eye. 

 

They are some of the hardest working, the most loving, and the most understanding souls on this Earth; yet, they are sometimes the most undervalued, and least appreciated among us.

 

Having no mother to guide me as I was growing up, I have a great respect for women and for mothers.  They add a softness to a world that can be as harsh as a piece of 60 grit sandpaper.

 

I wish you well, my friend.

 

pj 

 

[[...]]

What a wonderful and inspirational story. Thank you so much for sharing. You should be very proud of yourself. You have come so far......healed. Awesome!

 

Hi brc

 

Thank you.  I wish you well on your journey to wherever that may be.

 

pj

 

 

 

[[fl...]]

Pj, I'm sorry to read that you didn't have a mother's guidance growing up.  Yet despite this, you have such wonderful compassion, intuition, sensitivity and depth of character.  You nurture many people here on BB, much the way a kind parent would. 

 

[[...]]

Hi floc,

 

I'm about to grab some nourishment so I can finish another fourteen hour day, doing what I love to do.  Before I eat, I wanted to take a minute and thank you for your kind words.

 

It may seem odd, but growing up in foster homes is an experience that I cherish, because it taught me so many of life's lessons at a very young age.  I learned about compassion.  I learned about the good and the evil that folks are capable of.  I learned about being a friend to the friendless.  I learned about helping the hurting, and I learned how to turn darkness into sunshine.

 

Although just a kid myself, I was often a surrogate parent to the other kids who had no one to love them or no one to care about them.  I would hug them and tell them that everything was going to be okay, and that I would be their friend; something they never experienced before in their young lives.

 

I was hesitant to post this because the last thing I want is folks to feel that I was looking for sympathy or that I am in any way special.  That's not me. 

 

I just want folks to know that even the darkest days in our life - when everything seems hopeless - if we are patient, if we are accepting, if we never give up hoping, and if we never give up on our goals or our dreams - those darkest days in our life when all seemed hopeless can absolutely turn into some of the brightest days in our life where hopelessness no longer exists. 

 

pj   

[[Ja...]]

 

[[pa...]]

Hi floc,

 

I'm about to grab some nourishment so I can finish another fourteen hour day, doing what I love to do.  Before I eat, I wanted to take a minute and thank you for your kind words.

 

It may seem odd, but growing up in foster homes is an experience that I cherish, because it taught me so many of life's lessons at a very young age.  I learned about compassion.  I learned about the good and the evil that folks are capable of.  I learned about being a friend to the friendless.  I learned about helping the hurting, and I learned how to turn darkness into sunshine.

 

Although just a kid myself, I was often a surrogate parent to the other kids who had no one to love them or no one to care about them.  I would hug them and tell them that everything was going to be okay, and that I would be their friend; something they never experienced before in their young lives.

 

I was hesitant to post this because the last thing I want is folks to feel that I was looking for sympathy or that I am in any way special.  That's not me. 

 

I just want folks to know that even the darkest days in our life - when everything seems hopeless - if we are patient, if we are accepting, if we never give up hoping, and if we never give up on our goals or our dreams - those darkest days in our life when all seemed hopeless can absolutely turn into some of the brightest days in our life where hopelessness no longer exists. 

 

pj 

 

Hello Dearest PJ,

 

Came on to your thread, as I always love to read your extension of care of love to one and all on this site.

 

What you shared is exactly the specialness of yourself. What a treasure you have always been to everyone on this site, as well as off this site, as you shared.

 

14 hours.. Whew..  Yes, it is with horses and on a ranch in the country.  It has to be!!

 

Rest well dear PJ, eat well and enjoy your new life. Remember... you NEED to write that novel.. You truly must!  Though, please have your pen name PJ... so we all all know!

 

With lots of love to you...

 

Pattylu  (one of your co-authors.. )

[[...]]

 

 

Hi Jazzy

 

I hope that with each passing day, life continues to get better and better for you.

 

[[...]]

Hi patty,

 

Sorry I didn't acknowledge your post sooner, but I've been busier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

 

Within a few minutes after my head hits the pillow I am sound asleep ... a far cry from when, during withdrawals, I would sometimes lie awake all night, my mind racing faster than Secretariat ... on his way to winning the Triple Crown.

 

Many nights before nodding off, I think of the folks who haven't healed yet.

 

Sometimes I feel a little guilty because I am feeling so good and doing so well. 

 

But that guilty feeling doesn't last too long, cause I know in my heart that the day will come when everyone will be healed, and they will be feeling just as good as I do and they will be doing just as well or even better than I am.

 

I've been singing the same old song about healing and happiness for a  very long time now,

because that is what I believe.  I truly believe that everybody recovers, and when they do - happiness, contentment and an inner peace become as much a part of their life as the air they breathe.   

 

There were many days when I felt the same way that some of  the guys who have not yet healed must be feeling at times.  Just like them, I thought I would never heal.  I thought I would forever have those withdrawal symptoms.

 

I felt lost.  I felt confused and I felt lonely - just like them - I was scared.

 

You kind folks who are patiently waiting to be healed - write a note to yourself with the words, " withdrawals don't last forever" scrawled on it ... tuck that note in your pocket or inside your shoe ... look at it several times a day, and before you know it ... you will have healed,

 

because, patty, as you know ... your husband Ron, and the thousands of other fine folks who have recovered can attest to the fact that it is indeed true ... 

 

"Withdrawals don't last forever!" 

 

Blessings to you and everyone, patty.

 

pj

[[Mo...]]

PJ, i love your posts , don't ever feel guilty, we are ever so grateful

for coming back and giving hope, bless you.

[[ca...]]

Hey PJ and Claudia,

 

I think it is survivor's guilt.....When I am feeling better, I stay away from BB...When I am feeling worse, I come running back to BB....

I know eventually I will heal, because I am so much better now than I was even 3 months ago...

One day I will come back and write a success story and one day this will all be a bad memory of a very hard time.

I am not sure how I will feel about it in the future...

but I know i am going to be very grateful to never take another Benzo and not worry about walking across a room...

 

Thanks so much for coming back and encouraging us PJ...

I will try to be like you when I am healed and come back to help and encourage those still in it...

i guess this is the true "paying it forward".

 

Love and healing,

Causing

[[Mo...]]

you see PJ ?

causing its a deal, you and i are coming back when this is over,

thats the least we can do. what would we have done without this Forum ?

LOL. the thought alone makes me shudder.

[[Ja...]]

Thank-you PJ. I am starting to feel much better/healing. Wishing you the best as always! You are very special!  .

[[pi...]]

Thank-you PJ. I am starting to feel much better/healing. Wishing you the best as always! You are very special!  .

 

HI Jazzy!!! I'm so happy to hear you are feeling better, much better. There is nothing but more healing ahead of you. 

 

PJ, what a treasure you are to offer so much hope from your heart.  A long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.  What a picture that brings to mind. 

 

I know what you mean about busy days,  what a change from our withdrawal days. 

 

PG

[[Ja...]]

Thank-you piano girl for your well wishes and for the hope you always gave me. It meant so much to me. You are a special lady 

[[ma...]]

Thank you PJ for all your caring & inspiring words.

As you know, it helps so much.

My new mantra is "Benzo WD doesn't last forever..."

Thank you

 

margaretisabel