When I joined many years ago, they had just gone through a major change here, and they had archived something called Buddy Space, and I remember so many members being sad about that. 

I have just come back after being gone for some years, and I was also shocked to find our beloved Blogs have been archived. Having that outlet and way to communicate with fellow buddies (among other areas of the forum that have now been archived) literally saved my life. I have mixed feelings about my blog, and copying it or having access to it. 

I suppose it's healthy for me to leave that part of my life behind, but I do have some hesitations. Long before I was ready to even create my blog, I was a long time lurker and I would spend hours, probably days (since I never slept) searching topics, and then reading blogs. I got to know so much about my own c/t w/d and I gained much insight into what this entire thing was all about. I wrote my blog for myself and my buddies, but I also always tried to give information about my situation that would be uplifting and comforting to others who might to come my way, since that is how I was helped in my earliest days here. 

Maybe it's just my ego talking; I guess I though I had left some kind of mark on this forum, and that maybe some newbies would be saying, "that M really helped me through... "

I think you ought to be able to just go to your blog and copy and paste into a doc on a laptop or desktop, right? Wishing you all the best... M. 

Hello @[Ta...]

Your old blog is archived. It will not be deleted. You can access it here:

Thank you for your comments, Minneapolis Girl and Colin.

Yes, it is time to grow and evolve the site and adjust accordingly and it will be nice that our old blogs will be archived and not deleted. It was so funny that I had no idea what a buddy blog even was when I created one...I dove headfirst into my narrative before truly grasping the functions it was to serve. I chalk my awkwardness on the site back in 2018 to my massive cognitive impairment from benzo withdrawal, but hopefully now I should fare a bit better. And truly Minneapolis Girl, I am certain your old blog served others as a great source of comfort and connection. I never realized how many lurkers we have here and they are reading all the posts and even the blogs, not commenting, but gathering information or seeking distraction. I do not blame them at all... we all have our own comfort levels whilst in this mess. 

Hi @[Ta...]

The truth is, none of knew what 'Buddie Blogs' was. Or, at least, how it would turn out. We had some vague intension for members to create personal threads, but it became a place where members would park themselves and not interact much in the main parts of the community. It was never intended to be withdrawal support, but it did detract from such support on main support forums. This was to the detriment of every member, particularly newer members. Newer members, not being as supported as they might, tended to leave. And as older members members tend to drift away over time, they were not being replaced. This necessitated change in how BB is organised.

It was nobody's fault of course. It is just how it worked out. Group dynamics and all that.

We are already seeing great improvements in how members interact here. I will release some figures at the end of the month which should underline the positive changes.

Hi Colin,

What you said makes so much sense! I did feel that certain people would park themselves in each other's blogs and limit interaction with newbies/others on the site, and I am sad to learn that discouraged new members from staying on the site. It is very encouraging to learn that the new site organization is helping change matters. It would be very cool to see some results of this! I will keep plodding along and see if I can navigate the new set-up...shpuldtn take too long. Many thanks to you, Colin! 

Hi @[Ta...] I will probably simplify the archive spaces. I attempted to preserve the hierarchical structure from the original forum setup - I think was a mistake. So I'll probably rearrange the archived forums into a flat structure.

It is subjective - difficult to compile supporting figures - but the team have noticed much better engagement between old and newer members. This is important - this what peer support is about. What is irrefutable is that the withdrawal and taper support forums are markedly busier than they were before the move to the new software and reorganisation only a month ago. And as newer members seem more likely to stick around now, we will become even busier over the coming months. This is good news for all members.

Yesterday I saw the neurologist for the second time and typed up a little "BIND" resource sheet for him and made copies for the office just in case. When I saw him last year to talk about my withdrawal-related symptoms and horrible migraines he didn't like the word "protracted withdrawal" syndrome and said, like most medical professionals do, "but the drug is out of your system so its not withdrawal related!" I said, "I know people get caught up on the language but that is what they are calling it." Then sure enough, I hear about the Colorado Consortium coming together to create new terminology and do research. So on this trip I came prepared with a list entitled "Resources to learn more about Benzodiazepine Induced Neurological Dysfunction" and listed benzoinfo.com, benzoreform.org, the Colorado Consortium page for the benzo work group, The Ashton Manual, Dr. Josef Witt-Doering's webpage and YouTube Channel, Angie Peacock's YouTube channel...they have wonderful interviews with affected people. I asked him if he gets other patients that have been affected/harmed by psych meds and he nodded yes, so I told him again what a growing problem it is and gently recommended that he check out these resources to learn more. He seemed more receptive this time, so we'll see. He may have tossed it in the garbage but I feel like if I can plant the seed, maybe it will take root. 

The last two weeks I have been rocked with migraines, and it was a sensory overload experience that started this up. My therapist called it "sensory integration processing overload." I went to a restaurant and sat in an alcove with a dozen people and the conversations were so loud, and dizzying, that after a half-hour I wasn't sure if I could endure until my food arrived. Somehow, I made it through to eat my food and then gracefully bowed out. I was able to drive home, thank God, before the worst of it developed but that was it. It's now been two weeks of migraines to various degrees. Some days are bad, others it's just lurking in the background. 

There is lots of good news to report as well....I have been steadily more active and healing the last few months. I think my stem cell treatment has helped me tremendously. It's not a cure by any means, but I have witnessed much improvement. I am able to do more than before. I will update more on the good stuff later, because I can only write so much before the headache creeps up again. 

Wishing everyone all the best for hope, healing and finding support.

Hi Tater, 

I just came across your blog. I had dropped you a PM, just making sure it went through.

It's true a lot of people including myself started to park in the private threats/blogs. For me it was because reaching out to new members and telling them about my long term Protracted experience didn't seem like it would give hope to them. 

On the old forum you could download the thread, not sure about the archived ones. 

I will start a blog too, I just need to make sure my type of progress blog is allowed.

Interesting visit with your specialist. I tried handing the Ashton manual out and my doctors either refused or were very reluctant. :p I did my job. 

That is great news about your positive progress! Fantastic!

Until later,

Fonz

@[...] You can use your Progress Log to keep a record of your, well... progress, changes to dose and medication, that sort of thing.

Because of the way this forum software works, only you and the moderators can read your Progress Log. However, it is not our intention for it to operate this way. We hope to soon have a workaround so that other members will be able to read all progress logs, but be unable to reply Logs except their own.

If you have joined the replacement space for the now archived Protracted Withdrawal Support forum, we now have semi-autonomous 'Long Haulers' group. You read about it here (including access information):

I will definitely look at the link for the Protracted Members Support Threads. I am not sure where I should post or blog, because at 6 years off my final "medication" as of July 19, my story could definitely scare new members to the forum who are just learning about what happened to them, or are early in   their taper. It is why I repeat that I was on multiple medications, a poly-drugged situation and had been medicated for so many years. Neither my psychiatrist nor myself possessed any knowledge about tapering medications and therefore we tapered rapidly. Totally in the dark. I am so thankful that there are so many more resources out there for people and they are lifesavers. Benzobuddies has been my education and my support through it all. I was already off the last drug that I tapered, Klonopin, for over a year before somehow I found this website. What a blessing. I just want to keep encouraging people to take their time and not hurry to rush off medications because they feel they lost so much of their lives to the meds, or have become so disabled by the meds that they never want to take them again, or they overestimate their body's ability to adjust to getting off the meds as I did. 

Educate yourself about the medications. Learn about slow tapering. Make a plan. Maintain supportive friends in the community. You are not alone and there are people to help you. Do not do what I did and rapid taper. 

In good news, I am going to the gym about 3 times a week and engaging more socially than ever before. I have a new friend from my water aerobics class and we took a Greek cooking class, went to see Michelle Wolf do stand-up comedy, and I didn't suffer big set-backs from being around a ton of people with lots of overstimulating conversations happening around me. We were in a separate area to make the baklava and that may have helped! I am still dealing with long-term issues like chronic mental and physical fatigue, cognitive impairment, sleep issues, but overall...I am doing better than last year and the year before that. It is worth it to hang in there and hope to see better days.