The Klonopin Klub

[[re...]]

BookLamp, sorry it took us a while to get back to you--it's hard to wait when you're in so much pain.

 

I was glad to see someone who cares about you was there making dinner for you.  I hope a nourishing meal made you feel at least somewhat better. 

 

You'll have seen by now that there you had several responses, and people are worried about you.  Try to keep us posted, as you're able.  And I know I speak for many in saying we hope you get that job you're hoping for.  Fingers crossed.

 

Rek

[[Sk...]]

hello all!  Another great day.  no significant withdraw symptoms yet at least.  Still on 1mg/day.  I feel so much better now, being on 1mg/day, instead of 2. I sense so much distress in this thread right now.  I really hope everyone is okay.  I know that storm affected so many people and seems unlikely this storm happened just by "chance", as so many factors involved with it merging with the noreaster and the moon being full at the exact time...  It truly is scary.  You are all in my prayers that are affected by the storm.  Just the thought of over a million people not being able to get their meds!!!!! Oh my goodness! 

[[Ge...]]

It's so nice that you're doing so well, SkyZone.  I decided to cut two days early (after 12 instead of 14).  So far my taper has been so much easier than what so many are dealing with.  But I know that if it does get bad, people will be here for me.  In the meantime, I have my own set of life crap going on, and it's nice to have this as a place to share somewhat.

 

I also wanted to pass along my doctor experience for the day, too.

 

I finally went to the doctor for the lung pain I've been having for several weeks/month-ish.  Short version: I have had bronchitis.  (See, it's not always something fatal.  Or withdrawal.  )

 

However, the doctor wanted to prescribe Cipro, one of the fluoroquinolon antibiotics that we benzo taperers are supposed to avoid.  (See this page here at BB for details http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=36633.0)

 

When I let her know that I was tapering klonopin and that Cipro doesn't interact well with that, she was dubious and a little annoyed.  She asked me how much klonopin I was taking, and kind of laughed that it was such a tiny dose…  Anyway, I just told her I was working with my prescribing psychiatrist and felt confident, and didn't want to take Cipro, so she gave me a non-fluoroquinolon anitbiotic instead.

 

It was frustrating, but I'm so glad for this site.  If I hadn't read that page on this class of antibiotics, I would have unknowingly taken them and possibly experienced real problems with my taper.

 

So please be vigilant about this stuff.  So many doctors just don't seem aware.

[[Sk...]]

@[Ge...]

 

Hi there!  I trust you are feeling better today!  i am glad you are medically informed.  Those doctors sometimes don't know a thing about what they are supposed to know about.  i almost had lasic eye surgery and was told that it would be "safe" and 97% success rate and all.  Come to find out, it was more like 0%.  I did my own research and found out the truth and since my parents were going to pay for the surgery, I told my mother to take the $3,000 that would have been for the surgery and go to Japan to visit her family, which she hasn't seen in many years.  I don't trust the doctors anymore.  I only have 1 that I trust, that one is Doctor God.    Peace to you, Genoa.

 

-SkyZone-

[[ja...]]

Morning, all! Took Benedryl instead of Ambien last night, worked like a charm.  Much better today.

 

BOOKLAMP!! The only reason I didn't respond was that I was asleep. We're in the same situation in many, many ways. I have always suffered from Dermatillomania. To the point that people were grossed out and asked me if I was ok - to the point that after my hip replacement surgery the wound stayed open for a year! Ugly keloid on that one. I had 60 when I counted at it's worst. I even wrote a self-deprecating story about it. It's not active right now but that's always a danger, as I'm sure you know.

 

ALSO...during my 20 years on Klonopin, I "forgot" to pay taxes (18k debt right now), student loans (55k debt right now), credit cards (about 8k right now?), way behind on rent, was driving a totaled car...so I hear you.

 

ALSO...I was just in the hurricane too. I'm about 20 miles from the recently nonexistent Jersey Shore. Couldn't find my parents until yesterday. Almost all my friends are without power and out of gas. I have dealt with this by doping myself up with Ambien (see my post a little before) until last night. I hear you! I'm not working either...can't get there yet. I work south of here.

 

I have felt like you before, most recently in May. I checked myself into the Carrier Clinic where I stayed for 8 days. Is this an option for you? Carrier is awesome and you're close enough. Hang on until the bridges are open again, and try to get yourself there. I feel you need intense support right now and you will get it there. Hey silly, nobody hates you, nobody is sick of you and we all care. I loved that you were so sunny when you first got here - I swear that this too shall pass. Message me privately if you want.

 

Go Genoa, my friend. Not meaning to sound patronizing but I am so proud of you. SkyZ (more than one sky now, lol) you too. Thank you all for your prayers about the hurricane. It's just been crazy. I'm going to try to get away from the news today and watch America's Next Top Model. And meditate. Maybe twice. Hey ya Rek, Lizie, Piano and anyone else I forgot. Go Brian too!

 

See ya, people. Keep fighting! 

 

[[Bo...]]

thanks for replies and suggestions

 

will try to do nice things for myself today

 

plus, need game plan to refill K

 

still reeling from hopelessness

 

no one to talk to

 

$ is big issue; CCs go into default if payment isn't met

 

can't sell anything because NYC is on hold; much of Brooklyn "trapped"; can't get to Manhattan vendors I usually sell things to

 

$ tight for many people

[[ja...]]

Booklamp - humor me. Read my last post again. I GET it. You can talk to me. Message me privately?

 

Hopefully,

 

jaxnj

[[re...]]

BookLamp, Jax, Brian, Lizie, SkyZone, Genoa, PianoGirl, Lynn et al (I'm not intentionally leaving anyone out, so please, everyone, feel included) -

 

You guys rock.  BookLamp, I know it doesn't feel that way now, doesn't feel as though anything rocks (or not in a positive way), but I hope you are at least beginning to get a sense that lots of people are with you on this, really wanting to help you ride it out.  The hopelessness is terrifying, I know.  Listen to Jax, though--it's clear she's been there, and still shares some of your present experience (e.g. financial struggles, etc.).  I'm not familiar with the Carrier Clinic, but it sounds like something very much worth looking into.  Even just thinking about it might perhaps help by giving you the feeling that there's a place to go in case of dire need.  That sense of an available resource you hold in reserve can sometimes be reassuring.  OK, I just looked it up, and I see that the Carrier Clinic actually has some programs that are FREE, so if money issues are one of the things that might stop you from pursuing this avenue, it looks as though they don't necessarily HAVE to be an issue--check it out: http://www.carrierclinic.org/programs-free.php

 

Jax, I'm so glad you slept better, Ambien-free.  I've really been tempted to take Ambien some of these nights, only I am trying SO HARD to avoid not just benzos, but also Z-drugs--this on the advice of someone at this thread who'd obviously done the research (can't remember who--maybe Deinoncote; what happened to Deinoncote?  I tried to raise her again a few weeks ago, but didn't hear back).  I've never tried Benadryl, actually.  Something to consider, although at the moment I'm sleeping all right without taking anything except ginger tea.  Just my neck, shoulders, and jaw are like a cable wound too tightly--can't figure out how to fix this.  Can't tell how much of it may be residual clonazeapam poisoning and how much is just my own native tension, all concentrated in that part of my body.  Mindfulness meditation sometimes helps to a degree, but not consistently, not enough.

 

Genoa and others, too, do I ever hear you about the doctors.  This is one of the axes I constantly grind, I am so deeply angry with the medical profession, I feel SO betrayed.  I know I shouldn't tar all doctors with the same brush, that not all of them are equally clueless/negligent/corrupted by the pharmaceutical behemoths, or whatever.  Presumably there are still some ethical doctors out there.  Maybe even MY doctors are ethical, in some sense--just brainwashed?  I really don't know.  It just enrages me, the cavalier way in which we are handled when we go to them with our troubles.  I learned recently that a kid I know who's eighteen or nineteen is on Klonopin and Prozac, and my jaw dropped.  They--the doctors, the parents--have started this kid on that path so early in life, what will the kid be up against in years to come?  I can just about guarantee you there was dietary negligence that produced or exacerbated ADHD-type behavior, so instead of starting by addressing diet and lifestyle, they went straight to the corrosive medications, as if that were any kind of solution.

 

ARGH!

 

Sorry, just had to get that off my chest.  I will now go and breathe deeply for a little while, to see whether I can regain my composure.

 

Take good care, everyone.  You are all in my thoughts.

 

Rek   

[[kl...]]

hi klub,

 

it's my first day of my new job, first in a YEAR of being too sick.  Wish me luck!  I'm still all tired and puffy eyed.

[[re...]]

Wishing you ALL luck, Klonopinned--good for you.  It'll be OK!

 

Rek

[[li...]]

Good morning everyone!

 

Booklamp - Just want to let you know I am thinking about you ........ I know it's difficult right now, but focusing on one day, even one minute at a time, can help to calm things down.  I think if you can resolve your doctor/k issue, some of the stress will diminish.  Applying for a job is never a waste of time, by the way, and shows the capable proactive person that you are.  Keep posting so that we can support each other!

 

Genoa - I am so glad you went to the doctor about your lungs.  They have their place - the doctors, I mean, not the lungs!! lol

Good that you are informed about antibiotics.  Self-advocacy is so imperative as further harm could have been unwittingly done.

 

Skyzone - you cheer me up, in case you don't realise it.  You stay so positive and I am happy for you!

 

Jax - you are a gem, my dear!  What more can I add? lol  So glad you have caught up with your parents and that you managed an ambien free night in spite of this recent disaster.

 

Rek - thanks for checking in and being such a genuine support.  I agree with you about that eighteen year old - it is horrifying to see pills so irresponsibly prescribed.

 

Klonopinned - great!  Good luck!

 

Hi to everyone else and please forgive me if I have not said your name.  It's funny really, I only joined this K club recently and never thought of introducing myself.  I just joined in with the chat not realising no-one probably knew who I was !! lol

 

All for now,

Lizie

[[re...]]

Lizie, you remind me that I neglected (in my doctor-rant) to say "get well soon" to Genoa, and also express thankfulness that Jax found her folks.  Trying to hold onto as many fibers of this thread as I can, but some inevitably slip my grasp.  Lizie, thank you.  Thanks to everyone for striving, for being there.  And if I seem unduly down on doctors, please forgive me--I don't always manage to keep my perspective.

 

Thinking of everyone, sending positive wishes, hoping hoping hoping for everyone's recovery -

 

Rek

[[Sk...]]

Hey Klubbers.  Thank you rek, for always including me.  I was thinking maybe to get a second job, since ether one that I have now, I am self-employed and I pick the time and day to work and if I have enough money saved, I end up not working for a while.  I think a steady job that I am forced to go to on a regular basis might help me out allot.  If no, I can always quit that job.  I hope you aer all doing alright.  Keep on moving on, rek! 

 

-SkyZone-

[[br...]]

Booklamp:

 

Hello.  I hear you loud and clear.  I can't say I know exactly how you are feeling or what you are experiencing because I don't.  I can tell you that I identify with a lot of what you have been expressing.  I am also a person going through benzo w/d and my only intention is to provide support to you; as many people here have supported me.

 

Keep in mind the benzo w/d process will **** with your head.  I know it ***** with my head.  The way you are feeling and thinking may be greatly affected by your benzo w/d.  The real "you" can be temporarily distorted by this intense process.

 

Have you been able to reach your doctor?  Worse case scenario, many hospitals in the city and Brooklyn have units dedicated for people in crisis.  If you are concerned about running out of your meds before you can reach your doctor; consider a hospital.  The city is in a state of emergency - you would not be the only person in the hospital getting a routine medication filled that would ordinarily go through your doctor's office and a pharmacy.  Keep in mind NYC does have strict benzo laws; and hospitals will bill you if you don't have insurance.  So the hospital is a sort of last resort; but worth it if it is your only option.

 

Also, when you see your doctor; talk to him or her about your symptoms and how you are feeling.  Perhaps a slower taper plan might be helpful to you right now, considering all the financial stress you are under.

 

I live in Brooklyn too and NYC can be rough sometimes, in a lot of ways but especially financially - and crazy right now with the fall out from the storm.  It's like everyone is in a race and if you stumble and fall; it feels like you will just be trampled.  That's how I feel somedays anyway.  I live paycheck to paycheck; and my checking account is currently overdrawn $1,000.  I am $100,000 in debt (school loans, credit cards, etc.).  I don't think I'll ever really finish paying off my debt; I don't make enough money.  Some days, it all seems impossibly ridiculous.

 

The job market is tough right now; and no one could blame you for being unemployed, underemployed or otherwise.  Can you claim unemployment benefits?  My sister lives in NYC and is currently on unemployment as she was let go of her job.  Can you call the credit card companies and tell them you can not pay this month?  Sometimes they will work out a deal with you?  Can you borrow money from family or friends?  This is the time.

 

Like I wrote earlier; I don't mean to know how you are feeling or exactly what you are experiencing.  I can only offer some support and suggestions.  You are not alone in this process.  Reach out to people here, to people in your life (your family and friends), to your doctor and perhaps a therapist.  Sometimes it takes a broad support network.  I know it does for me.

 

Take care of yourself.  Please check in as often as you need to.

 

brian

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edit: Profanity removed

[[ki...]]

Hi. My name is Kim. Im about to embark on a taper off klonopin and xanax and have (I think) found my home for forum supprt in the Klonopin Klub. Ive read through the majority of the posts here and a lot on the site and thought I would introduce myself, tell my story and be active in this group as it sounds like this is where my benzo sisters and brothers are

 

Backline story: 5 yrs on klonopin starting at .5 mg 1st year and 1 to 1.5 mg for the last 4 and 3 yrs on xanax taken as needed but ranging from .5 mg to 3 mg daily. The intake of x was very low for the first 2 years or so (maybe .5 to 1 mg every 3 days or so. only when my anxiety was really high) but the last year or so, up till my hospitalization 6 weeks ago was a lot more wreckless (more like 1-2 mg most days, occassionally more and a day or two off here and there which was my attempt to maintain a distance from dependence). Never mixed x or k with alcohol.  I do think the randomness of my doseages (not only with x but I would randomely take 1.5 mg of k at night instead of 1 mg and any night I drank alcohol which was maybe once a week, I wouldnt take k at all), was probably the reason for my hospitilization and subsequent 5 days in a psych unit for suicidal ideation, racing uncontrollable thoughts, brain zaps and on and on. I also wonder if I was building up a tolerance to k and might have been feeling a tolerance withdrawal with my body wanting 1.5 mg everyday, not just whenever I thought of it.  I have always taken the k only at night and only for sleep. I never got or cared about a high from it so I shouldnt be fighting any addiction in that area though I did at times abuse the xanax for the high. Ive cut out alcohol (5 weeks) and pot and cigarettes (2 weeks) but cant guarantee I wont go back to those. I have no history of seizures.

 

After my stay in the hospital and lots of psychiatrists, psychologists and some visits with my primary who started all this stuff years ago by giving me klonopin cuz I was having trouble sleeping, I finally did some research on benzos and have had the daylights scared out of me ever since.  I honestly had no idea about the mess these drugs are. I thought klonopin was basically benign and that xanax was addictive so I had to be careful with it and basically just dont drink on them and if I wanted to quit I would have to wean off.  I had no idea of the nightmare involved with all this. Originally I was diagnosed with restless leg syndrome/sleep disorder so given K. 3 years later started developing panic attacks and anxiety issues (surprise! probably from the klonopin) so was given xanax to take as needed. Since being hospitalised though and with all the psych drs, etc, I've been diagnozed with all kinds of things (bi polar, severe depression, psychomotor agitation, affective disorder, adjustment disorder) but my research into all of these didnt really show my situation. I would always find things about the diagnosis that wasnt consistent with my experience. Then I found the benzo withdrawal symptoms and they were not just everything I had recently suffered but a bunch of things that I had been suffering for the last few years that I had chalked up to aging, hormones or 420 useage (major clumsiness, brain moving in skull, depth perception issues and floor movement, light zaps in vision, a fast and severe deterioration of my vision, acute narrow angle glaucoma, racing thoughts, intrusive thoughts, hypomania, suicidal thoughts, depersonalization, agoraphobia, anti-social behavior, exhaustion and so many more that just were so specific and exact.)  I mean I dont count some gi discomfort or headaches. We all have those for any number of reasons here and there and Im sure Ill have more as I go but so many of the symptoms were clearly what I had experienced.  It was clear to me that I had been suffereing side effects for a while and that my "breakdowns" of which I had 2 big ones and only went to the hospital for the 2nd one, were acute benzo withdrawl.  And thats when I decided to get off these meds, even after scaring the heck out of myself reading about the hell involved.

 

After going to my dr and devising a plan with her, we established my baseline dependence at 1 mg klonopin with a 5 yr history and .5 mg of xanax for 3 years (that was based on a very loose interpretation of my random useage). At first she wanted me to take .5 mg extended release xanax to maintain benzo through the day and cut .25 mg of k every 2-3 weeks  and when the k was gone we could cut the xanax. She gave me trazadone to help with sleep. I already had a good number of .5 and .25 mg x pills to use for cutting if needed later.

 

Well, I tried the er xanax and hated how it dropped me like a stone hours after taking it and felt that was dangerous to just suddenly need to sleep at some random time and also didnt like the idea that I was going to take a regular dose of xanax every day when that was always something I had avoided. I also read about trazadone and decided to avoid them and havent taken one yet. Did some more research and talked in some forums and decided to follow the plan just no trazadone unless absolutely necessary and use regular x .5 mg and cut to .25 quickly assuming I really didnt have a dependence on x. I always used it either as needed when I would freak out or occassionally a bit wrecklessly for fun with pot and energy drinks. Never ever day so I thought that cut would be easy and I would eliminate it altogether within a week or so maybe using a .25 once in a while to avoid symptoms that were really bad but concentrate on cutting out the klonopin.

 

On 10-23 I started on .75 dry cut klonopin at night and .5 mg x during the day. On 10-28, I dropped the x to .25 mg. By 10-31 i was starting to have a lot of the same neuro symptoms and crazy thought patterns (which to me the mental stuff is the worst) and also started developing a lot of stiffness and pain in my muscles. Also either caught a bad cold or have cold symptoms from w/d. More research, more talking online and now Im re-thinking things again. Cuts are too fast, need to taper slower.

 

So my plan is to start today (friday 11 2 12) in the am to crossover from .25 xanax and add that to my .75 mg klonopin for a 1 mg daily total of k. This will eliminate the xanax completely after the c/o. I know the cuts were fast but the logic right now is that Im over a week in and not too terribly bad so try and stay where Im at rather than raise back up though if things get worse thats always an option. Im going to take .5 mg k in the am and .5 mg before bed until the c/o is stableized and then begin a liquid taper off the k at about 5% per week or 2 and holding at any time that the symptoms get bad till im ready for the next cut. I am concerned about taking a med in the morning that I only took at night but even more afraid of going all day with no benzo in my system. I used to use a xanax or 2 to help and I cant be that loose with this stuff anymore. I know 3 or more doses a day would be more optimal but frankly, I just cant see myself doing more than twice a day though if I can, I will.

 

Whew! Sorry that was so long but I wanted to get my story down. So does anyone have any feedback about my current plan. good or bad? Ill be seeing my primary dr next week so shes on board. Possible adjustments: I could maybe get her to prescribe valium but honestly I would rather work with what Ive got, Ive never had a valium (well not in 20 years anyway).  Also maybe the extended release xanax may have a purpose in this and I just need to get used to it. It would give me a stable dose of benzo but it isnt really condusive with liquid tapering. Also, any feedback on the trazadone? Should I keep that out of the picture? 

 

I have to say that having heard some of the worse stories out there about people being bedridden, unable to work, unable to function at all etc also has me wondering if maybe I shouldnt be stopping. At least not now (I have a lot of intense obligations over the next couple years that I will NOT fail to fulfill and if the symptoms of this detox stops me, I will go back on the meds until I can fulfill them. Thats not an option for me to spend the next 2 years in bed unable to move). Having said that, I am in decent health and have a lot of resilience and strength. Also a lot of resolve to get away from something that is clearly poison. I hate the mental affect this stuff has and more than even dying I fear insanity. I dont want to damage my brain anymore. I do intend to do this I just wanted to put it in there that if it gets bad enough, Im out and going to try and get back to where I was so I can function.

Thanks for listening (to those who made it through this) and thanks in advance for any help. I look forward to sharing and bonding with people in the Klub.

 

Kim

 

[[Sk...]]

I failed my rapid taper and don't want to continue it, due to the possibility of post-withdraw symptoms lingering for a long time.  Now I must re structure my entire taper plan. ughh! 

 

-SkyZone-

[[re...]]

Good morning to everyone--I have to run to class, but I want to comment on Brian's compassionate post, which contains words that I think could console us all, at moments of need.  Your post was of course directed to someone in *immediate* need, Brian, but I want to offer my own thanks just the same.

 

Rek

[[ja...]]

Good morning, all. It's a beautiful day but cold, which means crappy stuff for those of us without power in NJ, including my parents who are close to 70. By some miracle we have power, cable, gas, heat. I could go on and on about this but frankly it's so depressing. My husband and I got a Dunkin' Donuts to donate some coffee to the long line of people waiting in the cold with their red gas cans, only to find that they ran out of gas right before we came back with the coffee. We ended up getting a few bags of groceries for the Community Food Bank - something very close to my heart - a few years ago I was so screwed up on Klonopin that I lost a great job and ended up being a patron of the Food Bank. I swore I'd give back and so I'm really happy to do it.

 

Booklamp, I had a great experience at the local pharmacy. I needed birth control pills and needed a new script from my ob-gyn. He's got no power so I couldn't contact him, and the pharmacy is overriding insurance to get the pills to me. As far as the K and getting a script, the pharm may not dispense them because it is a Class 3 Narcotic. I second Brian about going to a hospital to get it if necessary, or getting to Carrier which I'm sure understands and has what you need.

 

Welcome, KittyKat! Thanks for bringing us up to speed with your history. You'll find here how we are all at different places, and can speak about the spectrum of beginning taper to 5 1/2 months off (ahem...lol). We ALL struggle and share our tough times and joys and appreciation of life. I drink a bit of alcohol because I love the taste of good wine (really!) and I'm not one to condemn 420 usage - I feel it has it's place. Getting off Seroquel I found it to be helpful. I also spent 8 days back in May at the Carrier Clinic - went in due to a breakdown, ended up detoxing. I was on Xanax for 5 years (1992-1997) and then Klonopin for 15 (1997-2012) and I hear you about the head fog. So welcome again and you're in the right place.

 

SkyZ, I remember you had your doubts about the rapid taper. Hang in there, restructure, keep fighting! K-pinned, how was your first day of work? And everyone else, it's another day to appreciate. I'm reading a book on mindful meditation, then practicing a bit. Rek, I hear you about it never being enough. 

 

Keep fighting, all! 

 

 

[[Sk...]]

Thanks Jax!  I am concidering meditation as well.  It can't hurt.

Peace to you all!

 

-SkyZone-

[[re...]]

Jax, SkyZone, KittyKat, et al -

 

Sky, indeed meditation can't hurt.  If you find it's too hard to focus on right now, you can always defer and try again in a little while, but it's definitely worth seeing whether it works for you.  Joining a group is a good way to approach it, if you have that opportunity.  Meditation, as Jax and I have observed, won't solve everything, but it has helped establish some equilibrium in our lives.

 

Jax, you are so good--you pay such close attention, and look after everyone!  Dunkin Donuts, Food Bank, and all--WOW!

 

KittyKat, that's quite a ride you've been on.  No, we are not really told, when handed the prescriptions, just how severely these drugs can affect us.  It's a huge omission in medical services--a grievance I've expressed in many ways in my various posts at this site.  But Jax speaks the truth when she says that you've come to the right place for support.  I feel as though BenzoBuddies saved, if not my life, then certainly my sanity, and this particular thread has been WONDERFUL for me.  It was here I learned that *I* was not crazy--it was the doctors who were holding out on ME, not giving me all the information I needed.  Had it been left up to them, they would have kept denying that my worsening symptoms had anything to do with the drug I was on, clonazepam, and diagnosed me with more ailments I didn't actually have, and prescribed more drugs to treat those non-existent conditions.  The doctors can be helpful, or they can be harmful--a lot of them, as far as I am concerned, have screamingly violated what I  believe is the first tenet of the Hippocratic Oath: "Do no harm."  But let me not go off on that rant again.  The main thing is, you have a great resource at this site.  I myself don't have the experience to address many of the questions you pose--those relating to trazodone, for instance--but plenty of people here do have that experience.  I also want to mention the site administrators as a really fine resource.  One of them may have contacted you when you joined, I don't know--I'm thinking that's probably standard procedure.  Betsy wrote to me as soon as I joined, and she answered some questions for me.  The administrators have seen and heard it all, or just about, and they've been through the mill themselves.  So you can turn to them, too.

 

Anyway, best of luck to you, KittyKat, and to everyone.  I keep checking in as best I can, as someone who can testify that there's a light at the end of the tunnel.  I admit my tunnel wasn't nearly as bad as some people's, but on the other hand I made things worse for myself by doing a REALLY FAST taper, and I still got through it somehow.  BenzoBuddies, Klonopin Klub in particular, provided incredible support.  Hang in there!

 

Rek

[[br...]]

Kim:

 

Welcome to K club.  My story is a little similar to yours (though I think mine involves more time on benzos and higher doses).  I started off with xanax like 5 years ago; then added klonopin about 6 months later.  The idea was that the K was always in my system (a 12 hour effect and I took K twice a day) for Generalized Anxiety Disorder.  The Xanax was as needed for Acute Panic Attacks; I took X probably every day or every other day.  I was on that cocktail for like 4 years.

 

About a year ago, thankfully my doctor was finally like "why are you on 2 benzos?"  So I increased my klonopin and stopped taking the xanax.  I don't remember the exact dosage increase of K but it was sufficient to come off the xanax (which was always written out as needed - I always seemed to need it!).  A few months ago my doctor said its time to lower the K.  I don't know how I worked up to such a high dose of K (4 mg daily) - 2 mg K in the morning and 2 mg K midday/evening.  I've tried to figure out a time line of such a high dose; but I'm sure it was gradual with the cycle of tolerance, with an accompanying increase in dose to have the same effect.  It was then that I really researched benzos and I found I was in a predicament.  Anyway today I'm at 2 mg K a day; 1 mg in the morning and 1 mg midday.  My taper plan has been a little fast so far; but I have tried to take advantage of being at a higher dose, as the cuts are a percentage game.  From here on out I plan on a much slower taper plan.

 

I think it is a HUGE accomplishment to come off the xanax and make your way to just one benzo.  I would take your time.  Make sure you are stable with just the K and no xanax.  After that, my philosophy is that slow and steady is the way to go.  It's not a race.  Taper when you are ready and do it at a pace that feels right to you.  You can always speed up or slow down the taper process depending on your symptoms.  Everyone has a different reaction to K and other benzos and w/d from them.  Take caution from reading the "horror stories"; but remember that it is not your story and it does not have to become your story either.  Best of luck.  You will get support here for your w/d process.

 

Wishing everyone the best in these unexpected and uncertain times.

 

brian

 

 

[[ki...]]

Thanks Brian (and everyone)

I took the .5 mg K this morning and that was really weird for me to be on k in the morning. Knocked me out for a couple hours which was good cuz I had a lot of trouble sleeping last night. Im hoping the .5 mg tonight is enough to let me sleep a little anyway.  Yeah, Im hoping the crossover to xanax goes smooth cuz k and x are equivalent in mg just k acts longer. I would like to get to the tapering asap but want to make sure the c/o is stable first.

 

Brian- sounds like youre on the right path and slowing the taper down a bit as you go should get you healthy soon.

 

Looking forward to all of us being healthy and benzo-free (those of us who arent yet) as soon as possible and congratulations to those who are free of this poison.

 

kim

[[li...]]

Hi to everyone!

 

Hi also to Kim and welcome.  You mentioned trazadone ...... many have had trouble, further on in their recovery, when trying to quit this. 

 

Like all sleep aids when used regularly, it causes dependence.  I was prescribed it for insomnia after suboxone but resisted taking it. 

 

Sleep eventually returned on its own ..... much safer that way.  Brian has given you great advice so no need for me to add more.

 

Take care everyone,

Lizie

 

 

[[Ge...]]

Sorry to hear about your setback, SkyZone.  Did you go from 1mg to 3 mg the other day?  You must have been feeling really rough.  I hope things settle down soon.

 

KittyKat, are you switching from klonopin to Xanax? You might research Xanax-ER around here before going that route. I've read some posts where people have talked about having a hard time tapering from it because I don't think you can cut them, and I seem to remember reading that they might be problematic to titrate, too. But I'd look it up.

 

I decid to cut on day 12 this time instead of day 14. I've had some wake-up anxiety, but I think it was going on before I cut. Life circumstances here have been stressful.

[[ki...]]

Genoa- No Im taking xanax out and replacing with klonopin so Im only tapering 1 benzo instead of dealing with 2.

 

 

A faster cut than planned is a good thing I hope. Relax and meditate, hot bath, etc. Stress can be knocked down at least somewhat without any chemicals

 

kim