Forced To Fight...And Win! 15 months Healed Yes....

[[ja...]]

jenny since I turned in month 11 I have not seen the day light last month I had some breaks and thought month 11 will be much better boy I was wrong.  My life is being wasted away my healing or suffering does not even follow a pattern

one day I am ok the next 3-4 days I get hammered I am taking hammered like Acute

 

I think my brain has damaged beyond repair I feel so sorry for myself and my family

I do not really want time to pass by I think I can live in my month 10

 

I do not even want the time to pass by because I feel I am getting worse and worse my baseline has fore sure been lowered from 60 to 50%

 

I am just another woofs read his story that's me I WILL NEVER HEAL

My poor friend pls hang on...

 

I know your feeling so sad and like your stuck like this forever. I to got hit so bad at month 11 .The wave hit me so hard and felt like there was noway my brain would get better. I mean my god I was so sick everyday for 11 months . Its hard buddie I know but when that wave ended for me I felt so much better. I was so relieved and the real me was there again. Pls just hold faith that you to will Heal.. I know you will. And I know Woofs will to !!!!

 

 

 

 

[[WT...]]

appreciate all the kind words jenny BUT  :brickwall:

 

You were on valium for one year

 

I was on Klonopin for 3 weeks

 

you took 20 mg and C/T

 

I took .5 mg and I C/T

 

you were on a totally different drug than me totally different mechanism of action

 

its pretty darn obvious that our damages are not the same

 

you took this drug in 2010 I took in 2013 who know what they have done to this pills to make suffering lasting so long

and perm

 

:tickedoff: :tickedoff: :tickedoff: :tickedoff: :tickedoff:

 

 

[[Ca...]]

Wtf

 

There are people who feel good after K.  Not that I am an expert but

I have been here for almost 3 years and have seen people get out of it.

It seems to be one of the worst ones out there.

I hope that you can hang on to your hope. You need that.

 

Love Carol

[[Be...]]

Jaso, you smoked during wd i read. My man left me and dad severly ill. I started again after i had quit 2 years....so it wonz prevent me from healing right? You healed.  I hope when i am healed it wont ref up symptoms again...

[[ja...]]

Jaso, you smoked during wd i read. My man left me and dad severly ill. I started again after i had quit 2 years....so it wonz prevent me from healing right? You healed.  I hope when i am healed it wont ref up symptoms again...

Hi Benzomama,

 

Yes I smoke through my whole w/d and allot. It may have reved my sxs but I definitly still Healed. Im still healed almost 3 years later . I quit smoking 1 year after I healed and do the Vapor cig. (Electronic Cig ) . But your going to heal no matter what

 

~Jenny

[[Be...]]

I just hope it doesnt prolong it.....and if i stop it doesnt ref up symptoms. I am beginning month 9 and mentally pretty bad, every single second. Were you bad every second? I was only on for 10 weeks....everyone heals right? I can hardly get through a day.

[[ja...]]

Benzomoma

 

I was very bad every second of the day . I cryed so much . I couldnt find relief my sxs were so bad non stop. I would get about 3 hour window then it would close..Maybe every 3 months . Hang in there this can shift and ease on you quickly. Your going to get better I promise. The mental torture will end and you will be happy again. I was so bad and got worse before I started to get better. But it does happen. You will you again and happy.

 

Stay strong friend . I know this is horrible having to fight through everyday . But you have to until this stops and it will.

 

 

[[Be...]]

Yes i got worse too. Were you suicidal? In a dark dark place everything scary?. I hope smoking doesnt make it take longer. Did you obsess about wd too? Its doing my head in! Does that stop too? Like do you stop worrying about can i eat, drink, do this or that? No anxiety left? I only have mental symptoms......very bad. Thank you so much.

[[ja...]]

Yes i got worse too. Were you suicidal? In a dark dark place everything scary?. I hope smoking doesnt make it take longer. Did you obsess about wd too? Its doing my head in! Does that stop too? Like do you stop worrying about can i eat, drink, do this or that? No anxiety left? I only have mental symptoms......very bad. Thank you so much.

Oh yes there were times I was so dark and thoughts were so bad it scared me. But when I did have those thoughts I knew they werent my own. This w/d was a nightmare. How scary what we have to go through I feel for you. But push those thoughts away your life is going to be so good again when this ends. I obssed about everything!  What If this ,What if that, Food was a big one because I was so sensitive to everything it caused my sxs to rocket. But Now I can eat anything I want no problems. I can drink coffee or soda. This is what will happen for you . I know the pain your in is so bad .  But if you can just imagine how much your brain is healing everyday even while ur hurting. That when the sxs slow down your going to feel like the You peering through.

 

You are such a sweet person and I feel for all this pain your going through. I am so sorry. But I am also so Happy I can truly let you know You will be ok. You will Heal . You will have your life back and all of this Pain will End

[[Be...]]

Thank you so much for your words!! God i hope this enda soon.

[[Be...]]

How did you distract yourself?

Did it help you?

[[ja...]]

How did you distract yourself?

Did it help you?

Hi Benzomamma

 

You look so pretty and I know with all my heart you will look that happy again with a Pure true smile again. Hang on to that!

 

I did so much time here to distract. I mean almost all of my waking hours . All day and into late nights.I spent so much time talking with so many special people here. It helps to talk the days away until relief comes. Honey I also had to except my w/d but also Know in my heart I would get through it! Once I did that I just chatted and chatted until I got some breaks in this nightmare. I had many horrific days and nights most more then not. But knowing people here where going through this helped me.

 

I also made sure I went outside even for only a few mins. I tryed to smile when I could. I hugged my family as much as posible because I had limited emotions and wanted to do everything I could to keep connected. When my anxiety wasted to bad I would listen to uplifting music for reassurance of good feelings. But Benzomamma you have to do everything you can to believe you will get through this. I know its so hard. I was there to. But I swear you will be good again and all of this will be behind you. Stay focused on your healing and happyness. It will come to you

[[WT...]]

I am in month 13 still dealing with bad insomnia

head pressure

clicking in my head

low energy feeling like someone punched me in my gut

anger

 

Did u have sleeping issues at month 13

did u sxs just lifted one day on the end of month 15 or it was few days before or after

[[ja...]]

I am in month 13 still dealing with bad insomnia

head pressure

clicking in my head

low energy feeling like someone punched me in my gut

anger

 

Did u have sleeping issues at month 13

did u sxs just lifted one day on the end of month 15 or it was few days before or after

Hello WTFK7

Insomnia is terrible Im so sorry your still having this. I still did have sleeping issues at month 13 but they were dealable.

 

My sxs never just lifted but rather Slowly subsided until they were gone. Month 13 is were I started to see some improvements and then around month 15 I was left with a few bearable sxs i believe I wrote in the first page of my success story what they were. They were nothing compaired to the other ones that were so bad for so long,

 

Im really praying for your your sxs to leave you so pls just hang in there because no matter what you may be thinking ....You will Heal!!!!!!

 

[[WT...]]

Thanks

i am having this yellowish colored bowl when did this go away for u?

Head pressure with dr is still there

where u able to nap at month 13

 

Did u have this at month 13 or 14

 

[[Mi...]]

Hi jenny how are you I hope you remember me we spoke awhile back and you always brought me such comfort I was just wondering when your sensitivity to food lifted, I'm 28 months end some things are better but my goid sensitivity remains. Cannot touch msg, vinegar and certain preservatives. We're you sensitive to these things snd when did it go away for you? I also have chemical sensitivity still, I was going along ok September and October and have been in a bad wave from smelling vicks I put in my sons chest then a few days later took him to get blood drawn smelled in harsh cleaning products for two hours and sent me into one of the worst waves I've had in so long, all these old symptoms have come back and are just cycling cycling , it's so discouraging . I thought I was getting better then got slammdd thanks again for taking the time to respond

[[Ja...]]

Just wanted to wish you a wonderful holiday season and a happy new year.

[[An...]]

This is such a wonderful success story!! Can anyone tell me how to find a blog? I would love to read Jenny's blog but I don't know how to find it. Thank you!

[[Ca...]]

I expect that Jenny will answer you. She has been tirelessly answering everyone who stumbles onto her success story. I know that she has her pms turned off but she does reply here.

 

She suffered greatly and is still giving back to us all with her support.

 

Maybe she has a link in her signature.

Carol

[[Ca...]]

No. No link. You could try searching with her name Jaso19.

[[ja...]]

This is such a wonderful success story!! Can anyone tell me how to find a blog? I would love to read Jenny's blog but I don't know how to find it. Thank you!

Angelprint  Hello

 

Thank you for taking the time to want to read my blog I will post the link rt here for you..

I hope your ok and healing fast. Stay strong and keep focused you will get through this.. I promise.

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=30105.0

 

 

[[ja...]]

I expect that Jenny will answer you. She has been tirelessly answering everyone who stumbles onto her success story. I know that she has her pms turned off but she does reply here.

 

She suffered greatly and is still giving back to us all with her support.

 

Maybe she has a link in her signature.

Carol

Carol Hi !

 

Your so sweet. How are you?

[[An...]]

Jenny, thank you so much for the support, hope, and the link! 

[[Ca...]]

Jen

 

Thanks for asking how is am. I am doing better all the time. Slow but steadily healing.

I am working quite a few hours everyday. My husband and I share a real estate business. He is the Realtor and I am a lot of other things

It is so good to have a brain again. 4 years of no working was definitely not good for our business but as you know. There was just no way to function through this.

I am expecting still more improvement and hopefully I will be able to write a success story someday.

I still have all of the physical sxs but they have become so minor now. I keep hoping that they will end also.

 

Hope that your life is going well. I will always remember you.

Love Carol

[[An...]]

Hi again Jenny,

 

I was so grateful for your response with the link to your blog!

 

One thing I always want to ask those who have healed:

In the Ashton manual it mentions that a great stress can temporarily bring back withdrawal symptoms after one has healed. Is this true?

 

It's my dream and hope to have a second baby if I ever heal from this horrible torturous withdrawal. But I keep thinking that the physical and mental stress of pregnancy and birth and physical healing postpartum are huge stresses so I worry they would trigger withdrawal. I wouldn't want to have that happen.

 

I know I'm years away from considering getting pregnant again and who knows how long for healing from withdrawal? But I can't help thinking of this every day. It has always been my husband and my dream to have 2 children and we still dream of it.

 

I have already asked one member who has healed and she said she hasnt had symptoms come back from stress but has had them come back from taking medicine - even OTC simple things like Benadryl. I've always been dangerously sensitive to medications of any kind my whole life so I do worry about if I would need a medicine during pregnancy or delivery.

 

Please let me know your experience if you get a chance - with symptoms returning due to stress or medicine (even OTC).

 

Thank you so much!!