getting off the Diazepam

[[Ol...]]

Yeah, I think I am going to cut 1 mg at a time for a bit.  Just got accepted into nursing school. It was the school I REALLY wanted.  I will be done with my prerequisites in December and start in February.  I have found I am not sleeping as well since I found out.  I got a lot of "Congratulations."  Now I just have to pull it off. EEK

 

 

 

 

 

Oleander

[[Pa...]]

Congratulations, you did it!  I have no doubt you'll shine, just like you always do.  So, you'll get some time off before you have to go back to school, that will be a relief, I'm sure. 

[[Ol...]]

Thanks Pam,

 

Wow, feeling the pressure now.  I guess it's sink or swim.  I have friends in nursing school who tell me I will have no life and how I might think that A's are easy but forget that concept now.  I think I need to just keep to myself about it and work on it one day at a time.  I am meeting with an academic adviser so hopefully she can either calm my concerns or tell me all of that is true.  If so, hope my hubby is ready to do some cooking and cleaning.  lol.  I don't know how you can be excited and nervous at the same time but it hasn't helped my sleep in the last few nights.  I need to work on my CBT a bit more.  I am still at 15 mg.  I really wanted to be lower but I think I need to take it all in.  The time, expense, life, etc. 

 

Why did I want to do this again? 

 

 

Oleander

[[Pa...]]

Yep, one day at a time works for many situations.  Don't try and live out the next few months of your life right now, at this very minute!  It's good to be prepared and have some tools in place to help you along the way, and it sounds like you're working on those.

 

I have no idea why you wanted to put yourself through this, but your drive has gotten you this far, I have no doubt it'll take you the rest of the way! 

[[Ol...]]

I agree Pam.  I am just dealing with the stuff I have to deal with right now.  I just need to finish this boring semester.  I need to get off the benzos.  I need to relax and live since I won't be doing too much of that once this nursing program starts.    I decided to cut some Diazepam tonight since I don't have a test until next Wednesday and I have a pretty easy week again.  Might as well.  So now I am at 12mg of Diazepam.  I have to take a drug test.  I took one for another school but they never asked me about the legal kind of drugs and I wasn't tested for them.  I hope this one doesn't.  I actually have no idea how long Diazepam takes to get out of your system when you get down to zero mg.

 

I wonder if anyone knows how long Diazepam takes to be completely out of your system for a drug test.  I am not sure if they care that I take it but who knows.  I am hoping to be off or close to it in 4 months when I start.  But then again, who knows..........

 

Oleander

[[Ol...]]

Everyone I spoke to told me no one cares about the benzos you are on for drug test.  NICE.  They should care.  But at least going down to 12 mg feels like 15 mg except I woke up earlier and got more work done.  Still took me awhile to get to sleep.  It has taken longer since I got in nursing school. Those thoughts that won't be quiet.  I am glad I have CBT tomorrow.  Hopefully I will get some new homework from him.  I am glad to be at 12mg diazepam.  I feel good but was a little worried I would have some s/x.  So far, none.  We'll see what tomorrow brings.

 

Oleander

[[Pa...]]

I knew you wouldn't stay at 15!  You know, I've read posts around here that talk about how long Valium sticks around, I'm sure it's long half life keeps it around longer than the others. 

 

I was reading your previous post, I need to do this, this and this!  Of course the last need was to relax, hey maybe you need to reorder them, huh? 

[[ve...]]

Hi Oleander.  I believe it takes up to 30 days for valium to process out of the system after the last dose.

 

Vertigo

[[Ol...]]

Thanks Vertigo and Pam, you  know you are right!!!!  I have to put relaxing first.  My mom is having a hip replacement Thursday and I have an exam on Wednesday but THEN I will relax after those.  lol.  That is as close as I can get.  You know me. 

 

Oleander

[[Pa...]]

I'm sorry to hear about your Mom, will you be helping her out at home while you're supposed to be resting?  I'm glad you're going to try to take it easy, remember this is your last shot at it for a long time!  I know though, that you have a lot of restless energy and need to find a way to burn it off. 

[[JA...]]

Hi Oleandender,

Congratulations!  What wonderful news on nursing school acceptance.  I know you will be a fantastic care giver.

 

If you have a chance with your experience with Valium, would you mind taking a look at my last post.

Thanks Jayne

[[JA...]]

Oleander,

It's me again,sorry for the bother.  You won't be able to see my lastest entry because I started a tread in the taper part of the forum,thinking this was a good way to possibly get more feedback, so probably now no one knows where I'm at. Thanks Jayne

[Guest [ke...]]

Oleander, congrats!

LPN, RN or NP??

 

Keryn.

[[Ol...]]

Thanks Pam.  I was going to take care of her and then she had to cancel the hip replacement because her husband got sick with a bad infection that landed him in the hospital.  Now he's in a nursing home.  He is very ill.  I stayed at my mom's house and helped out but not what I would have had to do with a hip replacement.  But I know that is coming on the horizon and we have figured out day rehab where they can pick her up at her house.  I hope that all works out.  I went down another 3 mg diazepam to 9mg.  No more double digits.  That was a tiny goal.  I feel okay.  I have had meetings at school and lots of stuff to sign my life away.  LOL.  I am taking it easy tomorrow.  A little grocery shopping and then the house to myself all day long.  I still have my CBT on Fridays.  He seems to be pretty good.

 

Jayne, thanks a bunch.  I have been away not online for a bit.  I will look for you but I am a little bit of a computer idiot around this site.  I don't stray too much unless I see at the bottom, the button to push to get to your journal but I will look for you!!

 

Thanks, Keryn.  I am going for BSN.  Nervous at all that math they want me to take.  That would be something you would just LOVE, I know!!!    I am going to practice some until starting date of Feb and see if I can test out of a class or two.  My hubby seems to think I will remember it.  I just don't think math is like riding a bike.  lol.  I am happy that I got my first choice school but not too happy that I am going to have to spend a small fortune on it.  It is a school that has 2 different accreditations and has been around for over 100 years.  But when I met my adviser she was no nonsense.  She said I am going to eat, sleep, dream, etc. nursing for the time I am there.  I should have said I won't be sleeping since stress brings back my insomnia!!!  lol.  I might kick up my CBT appts now since I have the time.  I think that he is helping me relax.

 

Sorry I have been MIA but crazy family and school business.  Should be quiet for the next few months till I start nursing school.  Then I have no idea what to expect. 

 

Oleander 

[[Pa...]]

Hey, it's wonderful to hear you're in the single digits now, that's quite an accomplishment.  I remember when you first got here, man you've made some great progress!

 

It's too bad your Mom's surgery had to be put off, the timing would have been perfect for your schedule, but life happens doesn't it?  You're going to practice some of your math skills?  Good luck with that, but it would be great if you could by pass some of those classes.  Maybe Keryn could tutor you online like he's tutoring his students. 

[Guest [ke...]]

Thanks, Keryn.  I am going for BSN.  Nervous at all that math they want me to take.  That would be something you would just LOVE, I know!!!    I am going to practice some until starting date of Feb and see if I can test out of a class or two.  My hubby seems to think I will remember it.  I just don't think math is like riding a bike.  lol.  I am happy that I got my first choice school but not too happy that I am going to have to spend a small fortune on it.  It is a school that has 2 different accreditations and has been around for over 100 years.  But when I met my adviser she was no nonsense.  She said I am going to eat, sleep, dream, etc. nursing for the time I am there.  I should have said I won't be sleeping since stress brings back my insomnia!!!  lol.  I might kick up my CBT appts now since I have the time.  I think that he is helping me relax.

 

I use to work as LPN, I really didn't like it.

I don't think the Medical Field is for me really..lol

Though..I have nothing against a good Medical Community.. lol yes I would love the math 

 

Keryn.

[[Ol...]]

Thanks Pamster,

 

I have been okay on the 9mg and it does feel good to have that single digit.  I have no idea why.  But at least I am going in the right direction.  I know Keryn is the math wizard.  I am just going to get a bunch of books from the library and try to test out.  I read what they want and a couple look like I could practice them and remember them but not like riding a bike.  lol.  To be honest, I don't think my mom should get a hip replacement at all.  She has needed one for about a decade but refused and then she had open heart surgery for a hole in her mitral valve and then she had 3 strokes.  I am a little worried as I am not allowed to be involved with any decisions regarding her health.  Her husband in the nursing home who has also had a stroke does that.  I did have to go to an elder care attorney to find out what to do if a decision has to be made that neither of them can make.  It's a big process.  I just hope I don't have a stroke at 59.  I get my cholesterol checked every 3 months.  Too bad I am my mom's only family member besides her husband.  Maybe she will put it off and think about it more.  I always wished I could talk to her about this stuff (benzos) but I tired and only confused her.  My dad gets it but retired 1500 miles away a few years ago.  Thankfully I have my hubby and this forum.  No one else seems to get it.  But since 9mg is okay, I am going to wait until the time seems right and go to 7mg.  It's easier to get rid of a 2mg than to cut.  See, it's the laziness in me. 

 

Oleander

[[Ol...]]

Keryn,

 

I have been meaning to tell you I like your avatar.  I used to watch House all the time.  Good medical show and Hugh Laury is great.  I have a friend that is a PCT and she's been doing it for 25 years and loves it.  I have a friend that is a LPN in a nursing home and loves it.  I don't know if I could do the PCT/CNA job and nursing homes freak me out.  They are kind of moving the LPNs out of the hospitals around here and into nursing homes.  They are also forcing RNs without their BSN to get one to keep their jobs and not paying for it.  It's getting a little crazy out here, if you ask me.  I can see why the medical field might not be the best place.  I have had big time doubts.  My doubts have been in my abilities with all the stuff you are great at like math and science but also how will I feel when I watch a doc prescribe a bunch of benzos to someone.  I feel they are so overused.  I won't be able to say a thing.  I have thought about that.  I love the parts of science without all the math like anatomy and physiology.  I probably should have gone into psychology.  I have a minor in it but have spent so much time and money on this but now the big bucks are going to be shelled out for this private school.  :'(  lol.  Oh, well, I never thought I would get off of these drugs so maybe I will be good at the nursing thing.  I better be!! 

 

I did find out that I get a free one on one tutor for all my classes.  I thought that was pretty sweet.  I might need that for math.  The math is self taught and when you are ready to move up, you just take the test.  I am hoping I can test out of a couple pretty quick.  They didn't look too bad.  Not thrilled with stats but I guess I will get through it.  Not sure how much I will use stats and economics in nursing but it might come in handy somewhere else.

 

How's things for you?  s/x doable.  I am still seeing my CBT.  I can't even tell if it is working or I have learned enough.  Who knows?

 

Have a great day

 

Oleander

[Guest [ke...]]

Keryn,

 

I have been meaning to tell you I like your avatar.  I used to watch House all the time.  Good medical show and Hugh Laury is great.  I have a friend that is a PCT and she's been doing it for 25 years and loves it.  I have a friend that is a LPN in a nursing home and loves it.  I don't know if I could do the PCT/CNA job and nursing homes freak me out.  They are kind of moving the LPNs out of the hospitals around here and into nursing homes.  They are also forcing RNs without their BSN to get one to keep their jobs and not paying for it.  It's getting a little crazy out here, if you ask me.  I can see why the medical field might not be the best place.  I have had big time doubts.  My doubts have been in my abilities with all the stuff you are great at like math and science but also how will I feel when I watch a doc prescribe a bunch of benzos to someone.  I feel they are so overused.  I won't be able to say a thing.  I have thought about that.  I love the parts of science without all the math like anatomy and physiology.  I probably should have gone into psychology.  I have a minor in it but have spent so much time and money on this but now the big bucks are going to be shelled out for this private school.   :'(   lol.  Oh, well, I never thought I would get off of these drugs so maybe I will be good at the nursing thing.   I better be!! 

 

I did find out that I get a free one on one tutor for all my classes.  I thought that was pretty sweet.  I might need that for math.  The math is self taught and when you are ready to move up, you just take the test.  I am hoping I can test out of a couple pretty quick.  They didn't look too bad.  Not thrilled with stats but I guess I will get through it.  Not sure how much I will use stats and economics in nursing but it might come in handy somewhere else.

 

How's things for you?  s/x doable.  I am still seeing my CBT.  I can't even tell if it is working or I have learned enough.  Who knows?

 

Have a great day

 

Oleander

 

I have been meaning to tell you I like your avatar.  I used to watch House all the time.  Good medical show and Hugh Laury is great.

 

I am Hugh Laury, ya figured me out kidding.

Ya it's a good show.

He's a hell of a doc..

 

I don't know if I could do the PCT/CNA job and nursing homes freak me out. 

 

lol, why do they freak you out?

I worked in several Nursing Homes.. frankly I got tired of "Mama says you did that! Can you get Mama this?"

It was a full time Job to attend to one who needs a bath after having one an hour earlier and then the lady down the hall in let's say 112A is dieing..!

 

 

They are kind of moving the LPNs out of the hospitals around here and into nursing homes. 

 

Yes, I was talking to a friend who is taking Medical Coding at the time.. the one I talked with last night hrs. on in. She was telling me about they're not hiring LPN's in her state.

They don't hire too many LPN's here much either, in NYC  they did.

 

 

how will I feel when I watch a doc prescribe a bunch of benzos to someone. 

 

Ohhh, I've seen this many times and have also administered it, particularly Ativan Doc's orders..!

But then I didn't know what it was really, I had rounds with the Med cart, but I mostly charted.. 6 hours out of the night.

 

What kind of Math are you doing? Statistics? aww that's easy

LPN, we only had Algebra, and now I see Math everyday.. I'm going for Masters in Math & Science, which I will get.

LIU Long Island University.. (online Courses) @ the time. This is why I need to move back to Brooklyn, NY..

 

How's things for you?

 

Good, fairly well, and you?

 

Keryn. oh MD 

 

[[Ol...]]

Just got a phone call from the drug testing unit from the nursing school who informed me I tested positive for benziodiazepines.  She asked what I was on.  I told her diazepam.  I said I use two different amts, 2mg and she guessed also 5 mg.  Those are the two bottles I am using now.  She needed the pharmacy name and number and the prescribing doctor.  She said it would be verified and the school would get back to me.

 

Wondering if when they tested, it came back to the number of mg I was taking a month ago or when??  She never asked how much I was taking or what for.  The urine test was a split test so they can test one and keep one as a baseline. 

 

Anyone think this could be a problem?  In May I was on 60mg of diazepam, now I am on 9 mg of diazepam.  No other drugs since then

 

Thanks.

 

Oleander

[[Pa...]]

How scary!  When was the sample taken?  You say she guessed you had the 5 mg pills, how would she know that?  I know Vertigo mentioned that Valium clears the body after 30 days, so your blood concentrations should be reducing as you go.  I hope this won't cause you any problems, wow, they're thorough.

[[Ol...]]

Pam,

 

She must have figured it out when I said I had 2 different amts I am taking and read her the stuff on the bottle from the 2 mg.  Then she said the other is a 5mg?  IT must have been the concentration.  Geez, it starts end of Feb.  I think I will be off by then but still in system.  School hasn't called me yet to discuss.  They were verifying.  I was nervous but I am getting to the point where if it doesn't happen I have the pre reqs for ultra sound program or radiology technician.  Both cost 10K instead of 60K plus all the interest.  I am getting bored of this whole song and dance.  I don't even know how I would deal with watching a doc give out benzos.  I feel so upset about them.  I might want one of the other 2 programs.  Less stress, better sleep, less debt.  I am still helping people.  I don't know.  I have to think.  That is what the weekend is for.  By the way, I was on the chat line last night and I swore on accident.  It was covered up but wanted to apologize.  I don't usually do that kind of thing but I just made a mistake.  I hope I am not in trouble for that.  I am sorry.  It was an oops.  I guess I will find out next week if these benzos won't let me in nursing school.  Boy, would I be extra mad at the doctor for that!!!  My hubby was really mad.  This doc KNEW what I wanted to do and what I have done to get in.  Do they even think??  I wish I did.  I sure am now.  The 9mg feels the same as 12mg so I think the CBT is helping me to relax to sleep and not the pills.  I just don't want s/x so I am going down on them but could probably move it a little quicker but don't want to c/t the rest even though it his hardly anything compared to what I was taking in the beginning. 

 

Oleander

[[Pa...]]

No worries about your chat oops, we see lots of them. 

 

I can tell you're angry, but why would having benzo's in your system disqualify you from entering school?  If you have a prescription, then it's not against the law.  I hope you won't divert from your plan, I realize you can do good either way, but your passion has been this for some time now.  I hope you'll take the weekend to be calm and go with the flow for now, and not read more into this than there is.  I'm not trying to minimize, I'm just trying to diffuse. 

[Guest [ke...]]

Oleander,

 

I tried taking the 5mg pills I couldn't.. for some reason, so I 1/2 a 10mg.. that's the only mg I can take..

 

Keryn.

[[Ol...]]

Looks like the blood test was fine with them so good for that.  Had a long Thanksgiving weekend.  My dog is sick and she had to go to the hospital today.  We thought we were dealing with pancreatitis but turned out to be some new allergies.  Went down a couple more mg so now down to 7 mg.  I am actually sleeping better than the 9 mg.  Have no idea why.  Hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving and will be back on soon.  Need to hang out with my dog, poor thing.

 

Oleander