Reassurances from professionals that we will heal

[[mi...]]

Hi coop......yes I am now (almost anyway) an accomplished paster....that is not even a word.... ...

 

Well I will tell you what I did.....You can start at the bottom or the top of what you want to copy.... I had to play around with that alot....then left click you will see a blue cover the words as you drag over them.....

 

then once you accomplish that......leaving the cursor in the blue......right click, it should come up with a box with the word copy.....right click copy..

 

then go to where you want to put it......or reply box.....right click and you should see a box with the word paste..... right click paste and it should magically appear.....the key word here is should .....I hope I have all those clicks right.....I really love blaming the benzo brain if I cannot do something....I wonder what I will use when I heal

 

let me know if it works I hope you are feeling well coop....... ......m 

[Guest [Mi...]]

Hey, Cooperten and Minnie.

 

Wonderful thread, Minnie.

 

You both mentioned needing info on using "quotes." The below link has great info with pictures. 

 

Quoting Tutorial (with pictures)

 

I was so confused when I face planted into this forum, I needed the step-by-step guides!

 

Hope this helps. 

[[mi...]]

Mindseeker thanks so much......I need someplace to practice....... .....I probably did not explain it right to coop....but this will help us all thanks again....

 

I am off to distract..... ....m

[Guest [Mi...]]

Mindseeker thanks so much......I need someplace to practice....... .....I probably did not explain it right to coop....but this will help us all thanks again....

 

I am off to distract..... ....m

 

Hey, Minnie.

 

Feel free to jump into the Sand Box and practice. It makes a great distraction!

 

Also, check out the stickied threads on the Technical Support forum for more tutorials.

 

By the time we heal, we're all going to be totally computer literate! 

[[mi...]]

Hey Mindseeker.....my husband kept telling me to take a computer course......so thank god for w/d?....I now found free lessons...I rarely sent a text message until I decided to join BBs.....thanks for steering me in the right direction .....

 

....m....

[[Co...]]

Minnie and Mindseeker...thank you so much for the links and instructions. Minnie,  you did a great job of instructing.

. ..Me too... when I joined BBs I really didn't know how to barely text. I learned to write and post to BBs on my 5 year old 'smart ' phone. It took hours and hours of learning...lol. It became a perfect distraction during taper and acute. . 

....have a peaceful rest Minnie... coop

[[mi...]]

Thanks coop.....I hope you are successful.....I need alot more practice.....it is a good time to learn as it takes all of my concentration....

 

Hope you are doing well.... ..m...

 

[[sa...]]

What about kindling....PRN user never stabilized cold turkeyed five times....do we still heal

 

[[...]]

Minnie and all,

So good to read what I know in my heart already. I am only tapering so not at zero yet to even think about the following two years but already, I am suffering from benzo flu, had it twice now and realise that it will be okay, I will have good days and bad days even with the taper, even if it is a slow one, I will feel it and it is okay. I can accept it for the most part. I was tearful today, that bothered me but I realised tears are a release, let me learn to cry and allow myself to cry........time to feel again. This is a journey and a good one, so much to learn on the way.  :smitten:

[[Wo...]]

Great thread, hope it keeps going as it's filled with hope I hope

[[mi...]]

Woofs.....I hope you are doing well.....you were on for such a short time.....what a trail of destruction this med leaves behind...I still find it hard to believe.....

 

Yes I feel this thread is very reassuring....I hope more people respond...I am glad you bumped it up.....

 

Take care woofs.....m

[[Wo...]]

Woofs.....I hope you are doing well.....you were on for such a short time.....what a trail of destruction this med leaves behind...I still find it hard to believe.....

 

Yes I feel this thread is very reassuring....I hope more people respond...I am glad you bumped it up.....

 

Take care woofs.....m

 

Hi minnie

 

I wish I was but I'm not, I was only on for 2 weeks for headaches, stopped got a taste of hell and took advise to go back on and taper off, so I did and tapered over 4 months and then stepped straight back in to hell again and I've been residing in hell ever since, still can't believe, understand or accept this was all caused by a little pill my previous doc gave me for what he called stress headaches..

 

Never in a billion years would I have believed something like this could happen had it not happened to me so that I guess is why no one believes me...

 

I do think I'm a rare example giving that I was such a short termer but in saying that there is loads of short termers on here still suffering and there is people who took for years long healed before me!

 

Every person is different, my brother took them for 2 months stopped and never had as much as a sniffle, sister in law took them for 8 years stopped and again not a sniffle so none of them will ever believe me and my aunt has been on them for 20 years and comes off them every January for a months detox and has never had a sniffle when off and then goes back on for chronic osterorosis pain.

 

So no one believes this is real bar all those unlucky souls who find themselves here!!

 

Get well soon

 

Best

 

Woofs

 

[[...]]

Woofs,

So sorry you are having such a hard time. It is incredible what happens with this medication and we are all so individual - just hard to believe but gosh, I believe. Wishing you windows of wellness.

[[Wo...]]

Woofs,

So sorry you are having such a hard time. It is incredible what happens with this medication and we are all so individual - just hard to believe but gosh, I believe. Wishing you windows of wellness.

 

Thank you Moyà

 

That's why this thread caught my eye as in 2 years I have only found 1 Neuro who believes in Benzo Withdrawal but even she said there is no way it can last this long but I've had every test known to mankind and they tell me I'm as healthy as a horse!!! So they think it's all in my mind even though before this I was a successful businessman and the total opposite of what I am now, so it only 2 weeks of this poison to loose everything I worked hard all my life to build, all gone and no one believes me!!!

[[mi...]]

Oh Woofs......It is so hard when other people look at you like you have surely lost it......it is so hard for others to believe this......especially those who stop w/o any problems....

 

When I spoke to my pharmacist about this he did say that even people who took it for a very brief amount could suffer the same as someone who had a history of long term use.......the good news is he said we would all ABSOLUTELY heal....he had no doubts.....so hang onto that....I do and it helps......

 

 

I am so sorry this happened to you......I hope you see relief soon....m :smitten:...

[[Wo...]]

Oh Woofs......It is so hard when other people look at you like you have surely lost it......it is so hard for others to believe this......especially those who stop w/o any problems....

 

When I spoke to my pharmacist about this he did say that even people who took it for a very brief amount could suffer the same as someone who had a history of long term use.......the good news is he said we would all ABSOLUTELY heal....he had no doubts.....so hang onto that....I do and it helps......

 

 

I am so sorry this happened to you......I hope you see relief soon....m :smitten:...

 

Hi minnie

 

I wish my pharmacist told me the same, my fiancée best friend is a pharmacist and she don't believe withdrawal last longer than 28 days and is adamant over that. She says she has lots of patients who take it short term and have no problem and also has long term patients who she claims function very well on the drug, she said I be shocked if I knew some of the people who took it from doctors themselves to teachers to barristers to 1 in 5 she reckons and she has never had anyone ask her about withdrawal after stopping so she thinks I'm bonkers for blaming the drug!!!

 

Well what caused it then cause I was perfectly normal before them and only took them for headacges none the wiser what they where, if doc had gave me Valium I would probably said oh I heard of it but he gave me Lorazepam which I never heard of... And here I am soon to be 23 months later after a 4 month taper so almost 27 months of my life have been stolen by this drug!!

 

It's criminal !!!!

 

Best

 

Woofs

[[mi...]]

Woofs....It is criminal......

 

I was reading the paper yesterday and there was an article that caught my eye....a man, I cannot remember his name, is writing a book about his experience with benzos ....

 

He is now a psychotherapist ......he aid that 30 yrs ago when he was 23 he had a break up with a girl, it upset him so bad that he started to get terrible stomachaches....they put him on a benzo...he took it for a few days and went so crazy they had to put him in a psych ward......they then pumped him with more meds for 2 weeks....

 

He was discharged and stopped all meds c/t... he said he suffered for 3 yrs....he said he completely healed, but no one believed him while he was going through this....that is why he became a therapist...he helps people talk through their issues and uses no meds....

 

I also want to say that I have known my pharmacists for 12 yrs.....one is a personal friend.....I have spoken at length with 2 of them, they have both been pharmacists for many years, they both agree that the situation you are in exists...they told me the people that suffer are extremely sensitive to some meds.....

 

So I hope this helps....we do know that the majority of professionals do not know about w/ds.

 

Hang in there woofs you will heal....it is so tough to comprehend why so long, but it will end....I am just so sorry you have lost so much and have had to suffer so long....

 

....m ....

[[Wo...]]

Woofs....It is criminal......

 

I was reading the paper yesterday and there was an article that caught my eye....a man, I cannot remember his name, is writing a book about his experience with benzos ....

 

He is now a psychotherapist ......he aid that 30 yrs ago when he was 23 he had a break up with a girl, it upset him so bad that he started to get terrible stomachaches....they put him on a benzo...he took it for a few days and went so crazy they had to put him in a psych ward......they then pumped him with more meds for 2 weeks....

 

He was discharged and stopped all meds c/t... he said he suffered for 3 yrs....he said he completely healed, but no one believed him while he was going through this....that is why he became a therapist...he helps people talk through their issues and uses no meds....

 

I also want to say that I have known my pharmacists for 12 yrs.....one is a personal friend.....I have spoken at length with 2 of them, they have both been pharmacists for many years, they both agree that the situation you are in exists...they told me the people that suffer are extremely sensitive to some meds.....

 

So I hope this helps....we do know that the majority of professionals do not know about w/ds.

 

Hang in there woofs you will heal....it is so tough to comprehend why so long, but it will end....I am just so sorry you have lost so much and have had to suffer so long....

 

....m ....

 

Thank you again minnie

 

Your so kind to say all this when you're so early off yourself, how are you coping ?

 

It's scary that it took him 3 years, the thought of having to do this for another day is torture in itself but 3 years is insane! I rather walk on hot coal for the next year than do 1 more day in benzo hell that's how bad I see and feel it, there is nothing in this world as torturous or mentally disturbing as going through benzo hell

 

Nothing!!!!

 

Bless You

 

Woofs

[[mi...]]

Hi woofs.....I am good some days, and others are not so good....I c/t in feb. and developed horrific s/x.....I reinstated at 5 wks out.....It never made a difference.....I, like you, wish I would have just stayed the course.....but how could we know?......Nothing in this hellish process makes ANY sense to me.....the suffering we see here is criminal, like you said....and heartbreaking.....

 

I know you have read on here enough that we can never compare ourselves to others on this journey....although it is hard not to.....I only wanted to share with you that your time line does not mean that you are out of the ordinary......you could seriously wake up tomorrow and feel much better.....this process is so unpredictable.....

 

I know the horrors of thinking how can I handle this one more hr., let alone another yr......try not to think about how long it will last as that will only make things worse.....have you seen alot of improvements over these past mos.?....

 

I saw a huge shift 2 wks ago......however....nausea has been my companion for a few days and also a ringing sound that seems to be coming from my brain but I do believe it will pass just as many of the others have....

 

I used to really get myself in a tizzy when I would think, it just has to be gone tomorrow and it wasnt.....no matter what we think or do it will end when we heal......that is the hardest part to accept.....at least it was for me...now I just accept that I am healing ...I will be well again.....and just try to enjoy what I can and cry when I need to.....that is all I can do and it just has to be enough....

 

I hope your fiance is a support for you.....it helps to get lots of hugs.....I am sending you one ..m ....

 

I am here if you need some support woofs...

 

 

[[Wo...]]

Hi woofs.....I am good some days, and others are not so good....I c/t in feb. and developed horrific s/x.....I reinstated at 5 wks out.....It never made a difference.....I, like you, wish I would have just stayed the course.....but how could we know?......Nothing in this hellish process makes ANY sense to me.....the suffering we see here is criminal, like you said....and heartbreaking.....

 

I know you have read on here enough that we can never compare ourselves to others on this journey....although it is hard not to.....I only wanted to share with you that your time line does not mean that you are out of the ordinary......you could seriously wake up tomorrow and feel much better.....this process is so unpredictable.....

 

I know the horrors of thinking how can I handle this one more hr., let alone another yr......try not to think about how long it will last as that will only make things worse.....have you seen alot of improvements over these past mos.?....

 

I saw a huge shift 2 wks ago......however....nausea has been my companion for a few days and also a ringing sound that seems to be coming from my brain but I do believe it will pass just as many of the others have....

 

I used to really get myself in a tizzy when I would think, it just has to be gone tomorrow and it wasnt.....no matter what we think or do it will end when we heal......that is the hardest part to accept.....at least it was for me...now I just accept that I am healing ...I will be well again.....and just try to enjoy what I can and cry when I need to.....that is all I can do and it just has to be enough....

 

I hope your fiance is a support for you.....it helps to get lots of hugs.....I am sending you one ..m ....

 

I am here if you need some support woofs...

 

Your ever so kind minnie

 

Your statement 'nothing in this hellish process makes any sense to me' caught my attention as that's what I say all the time ' nothing makes any sense anymore' and I started a thread on it

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=107291.0

 

 

I haven't seen any improvement that's the problem, in fact I was better the first year off and that was insane hell but I could do a lot more and cope with stress much better, since month 16 it's all gone Peter Pan and I feel worse than ever but I'm hoping its just a case of it getting worse before it goes away like many have said just before they healed around the 2 year off mark, that's all that's keeping me going here along with some very supportive buddies you now included 👍

 

My worst symptoms are insane DP DR, unbearable head pressure, boaty dizziness and severe organic fear and anxiety plus a list of physical symptoms that don't bother me anywhere near the mental..

 

I will be starting 23 months out in 5 days and I'm praying with all I got that I ain't got long left in hell and any day now Satan will issue my release papers and I will escape back to reality and in to the promised land, that's my only wishful destiny right now, I hope you can all join me soon

 

Best

 

Woofs

 

[[mi...]]

Woofs....the suffering you are experiencing is just beyond what I can imagine ....I know you have probably done some searching for people who have been where you are and have healed.... today I am going to make it my mission to do some searching to see if I can give you some more positives to hang onto.....My words, though heartfelt.... seem so inadequate....I will see what I can find....and I will be back....

 

...m..

[[Wo...]]

Woofs....the suffering you are experiencing is just beyond what I can imagine ....I know you have probably done some searching for people who have been where you are and have healed.... today I am going to make it my mission to do some searching to see if I can give you some more positives to hang onto.....My words, though heartfelt.... seem so inadequate....I will see what I can find....and I will be back....

 

...m..

 

Ah bless you minnie

 

Can you find the name of the guy who healed after 3 years or send a link please ?

 

Thank you so much

 

Woofs

[[mi...]]

Hi woofs....I was in a waiting room and just picked up a newspaper and glanced at it ...I just finished the article and was called into the office.

 

I actually meant to find out more info on it , but I forgot about it until I got home....so sorry...

 

I just put in a call to my pharmacist to ask him about your particular situation.....he is benzo wise so maybe he will be able to give me some positive info for you.....

 

I will let you know after I speak to him what he thinks.....his wisdom is way better than mine.....m...

 

[[Wo...]]

Hi woofs....I was in a waiting room and just picked up a newspaper and glanced at it ...I just finished the article and was called into the office.

 

I actually meant to find out more info on it , but I forgot about it until I got home....so sorry...

 

I just put in a call to my pharmacist to ask him about your particular situation.....he is benzo wise so maybe he will be able to give me some positive info for you.....

 

I will let you know after I speak to him what he thinks.....his wisdom is way better than mine.....m...

 

No bother M

 

Again all I can say is thank you ever so much, it means more to me than any words on here can ever  say, bless you.

 

Woods 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

[[mi...]]

Thanks again for this MommyR.....I think it is worthy of reading again and again....

Posts: 436

Gender: Female

Believing I will be with those who are 100% healed

View Profile  Personal Message (Offline)

 

Re: Reassurances from professionals that we will heal

« Reply #20 on: September 12, 2014, 04:34:10 pm »

Quote from MommyR

 

Adding my super, awesome report from the detox yesterday.  I am suffering excruciating hot flashes all day with panic, fear, flu sensations, no sleep, nausea, head and neck pain.  All this started in July after we returned from our vacation in July.  I am 10 months out.  This has been going on for 6-8 weeks now.  Here is my post from yesterday:

 

Hi Kids,

 

I'm back from the doctor.  I just couldn't take it another day.  Yesterday afternoon I felt like the flu had come over me and wanted to lay in bed for two days.  Then at 3am I woke in the sweat again, out of breath and panicked.  I woke my mom up asking her to promise this would go away and then laid on the floor near the couch she was on.  (She spends the night a lot when my husband travels).  I did all the stuff I know to do, but day upon day of panic is nearly impossible to stay ahead of.  I ran my favorite scriptures thru my head, then fell back to sleep at 5am.  Around 7:15am I woke in fear and actually celebrated because fear is much easier to head off.  Panic crushes your chest and takes away your breath.  It makes your heart pound and your head hurt.  I was thinking about Nova and his cool cucumber ride to the ER.  I just couldn't do that again and then the phone rang.  It was detox calling to get me in from a phone call I had made two days ago. 

 

I agreed and dressed in full make-up, hair dryed and straightened, bling on and the coolest black casual dress hanging in my closet.  3 year old in tow, I headed to Newport.  All the way there I was practicing what I would say.  It was frightening to think about what he would pronounce over me.  I was in full paranoid mode.  When I got inside the nurse I knew was really happy to see me.  She was a great support during my taper into post withdrawal.  I stopped going in February because felt I didn't really need them anymore.  She took my bp/ hr and told me I looked good.  I joked around and handed my little side kick his iPad.  My youngest has gone to all my detox appts, which is kinda funny.  He has no idea what a comfort it is to have him along. 

 

When the doctor walked in he gave me a big hug and asked how I was.  As I talked, he typed.  I told him ALL of it.  How my last wave was in June, but that I had also started experiencing 100% hours.  I told him about our vacation in early July and how my symptoms had kicked off after certain events... the feeling like being on the ocean, begin attacked by chiggers, nausea, burning head ache, gripping pain in my neck and back of my head, coming home and being in zombie mode for 3 weeks and then the terrible hot flashes all day and night, fear, panic, missed period.  I didn't leave anything out. 

 

His response:

 

You are very strong. 

This is where people relapse.  They can't take it. 

You speak to me about your symptoms so matter of fact and know how to distinguish between each of the emotions (panic, fear, anxiety, depression).  This is good.

This is all really amazing and I am learning from you. 

What you are experiencing is NORMAL. 

Symptoms can be random with no reason.  They come and go.  It's how you deal with them that matters.

Interruption of menstruation and hot flashes are absolutely withdrawal related and he believes all my blood test will come back normal.

The hot flashes are most likely panic related and this is how my body is reacting to this wave.

Withdrawal can take 1 to 1 1./2 years.  (I'm going with 2 years)

People have come in this far out in withdrawal and are as acute as the day they walked in to the office. 

Recovery for benzo is like a roller coaster. 

You are handling it the right way and I know you will heal eventually. 

You don't need to come back if you don't want to.

 

 

He then checked my heart and any other paranoid symptom I had.  He explained where my carotid artery was and that the clinching sensation in my neck is not the arteries but tension from the random 'deck of cards' stressful symptoms.

 

I told him I wanted to get my certificate and then work with him to help others like us.  He said I would be an asset.  We hugged and said good-bye.  I called my mom and husband then to tell them the good news.. THESE HORRIBLE AWFUL CRAZY I'M GONNA DIE SYMPTOMS ARE GLORIOUSLY NORMAL FOR WHERE WE ARE AT.

 

Day after day I was thinking about Peace going to work and how her doctors had reassured her.  I was embarrassed to be going backwards and not forwards and questioning everything like Life mentioned.  I didn't want to go in and have the doctor say what he did at the beginning of this process.  I was such a wreck and even in my random conversation with him that first day, I was so negative and inappropriate in my responses, that he pronounced life long medication for me. 

 

I knew it wasn't true.  I wasn't that negative person.  These drugs cloud who we think we are and how we process things around us.  It affects the very core of who we are, so of course it takes time to get back to normal.  It's just I needed an outside person to agree.  I needed someone I trusted like him, the doctor who I feel saved my life, to also agree with what we talk about on the boards.  AND HE DID. 

 

Everything others tell us, he said to me.  ...Keep going forward.  It takes a long time.  The fact that we have made it this far means we will finish the race. 

 

I love you guys, so much for being there and praying for me too.  For the hands reaching out to me when I think I am sinking and can only keep my head above water.  I was unable to see the water rising around my ankles in this one.  I've been treading water so long.  I needed some one who was knowledgeable on the outside and who knew me and what we all go thru to agree.  AND HE DID.

 

Go ahead and make peace with the symptoms.  Lay in bed or on the couch or get up and go for a walk.  Whatever you need to do.  There is still lots of time... 

 

MommyR

 

It seems I even forget these wonderful stories when I am feeling bad......m to all