Reassurances from professionals that we will heal

[[dr...]]

My dr. who I educated on this is now giving presentations to the rest of the practice on teh dangers of benzos.  She defers to me as the expert.  She is using me adn someone else I referred to here from this site as case studies.  She says the level of denial is still high.  My primary doc in the same group emailed her I couldn't be having withdrawals out this far and it's anxiety.  I was angry but my doc said it's just they are not familiar with this and are learning.  Oh my! 

 

I refuse to modify all my typing errors due to benzo brain!

[Guest [in...]]

My therapist has also counseled many benzo wd clients and says that in her experience everyone heals.

 

Luigi, are you from MI?  Just wondering because there aren't many therapists in this field.

 

Nope, from WV believe it or not!

 

Me too, WV! Go Mountaineers! Ya think we'll be Maryland tomorrow? Of course we will!! 

Anyway, I think our state is the number one state per capita for benzo rxs 

[Guest [in...]]

*beat

[Guest [in...]]

I havent met a dr yet that has a clue about benzo tapering. I think the pharmacists are more knowledgeable. Ive had to research everything myself.

[Guest [Lu...]]

My therapist has also counseled many benzo wd clients and says that in her experience everyone heals.

 

Luigi, are you from MI?  Just wondering because there aren't many therapists in this field.

 

Nope, from WV believe it or not!

 

Me too, WV! Go Mountaineers! Ya think we'll be Maryland tomorrow? Of course we will!! 

Anyway, I think our state is the number one state per capita for benzo rxs 

 

Of course we'll beat 'em! 

 

And yeah, WV is #1 in Benzos. So sad. We seem to be racking them up! Top ten in obesity, poverty, diabetes, heart disease, alcoholism etc. 

[Guest [in...]]

Also known as one of the most stressed out states to live in, and tops for being neurotic! 

Ive been at peace here, feel safe and sound in my neck of the woods! 

[Guest [Lu...]]

Also known as one of the most stressed out states to live in, and tops for being neurotic! 

Ive been at peace here, feel safe and sound in my neck of the woods! 

 

Me too! I'm never leaving!

[Guest [in...]]

I might leave. The ocean's calling. But not anytime soon! I want to get off these damn little benzo pills, get my WVU son graduated, and off into adulthood, close our business, then think about selling everything and heading down to salt water!! But my heart may keep me in this little comfy state of ours! 

[Guest [Lu...]]

I might leave. The ocean's calling. But not anytime soon! I want to get off these damn little benzo pills, get my WVU son graduated, and off into adulthood, close our business, then think about selling everything and heading down to salt water!! But my heart may keep me in this little comfy state of ours! 

 

I went to WVU too! The ocean sounds amazing! I was just at Ocean City a few months ago! So relaxing. But you're right, the heart will always want to be in WV! "Take me home, country roads, to the place, I belong..."

[[mi...]]

This place is buzzing YAY!!!!!...so glad everyone is sharing so many positives.....m

[[Sh...]]

Yes, I love this thread. We need more to chime in!

[[mi...]]

Hi mommy......I want to thank you so much for that gracious post.....I had read that you were having such a hard time and my heart went out to you.....I am so glad you got this great reassurance from a dr......now you can breath a little easier knowing it will resolve and it is NORMAL....I just love to hear this and I cannot seem to hear it enough.......thanks again.....

 

I hope you feel better real soon.....m

[[mi...]]

Hi shakey......I agree more, more, more, .......m

[[mi...]]

Glad I am following this thread! Thank goodness for the health professionals who understand benzo withdrawals and for each of us who get to benefit from what all of you are sharing here

[[mi...]]

Thanks for coming here minnie2......it is so reassuring to read all of the information from the professionals that get it......take care.....m

[[mi...]]

[[63...]]

*bump*

 

I find this thread so encouraging! Thanks to all who have stopped by to post their experiences.

[[mi...]]

Hi 63 R......I agree, anyone with more stories to share.....thanks.......m

[[Ki...]]

My pharmacist and therapist have proven to be benzo-wise.

 

I asked to have a meeting with my pharmacist to discuss compounded liquid to titrate from. I explained the difficulty I was having and she said that she has made capsules/liquid for many patients trying to come off benzo's and felt that going slow was the key to success. She also told me that one of her patients is now recovered and the others are still tapering but making good progress and healing on the way. She also agrees that benzo's are dangerous and should only be prescribed when all other options have failed.

 

When I was in acute, after dropping .50mg, I started seeing a therapist. I had seen this therapist before when I had gone through my divorce. I thought she was a good place to start because she knew me pre-benzo's. I had no idea that for 10 years she had been a drug and alcohol counsellor. He advice and guidance was invaluable. She told me that protracted w/d from benzo's was common and that healing DOES occur. My therapist had never counselled anyone who hadn't healed but that full recovery often took 1-2 years.

[[li...]]

Great thread!

 

I may not have had much professional support on the way ....

but I know how much it means to hear from people who have recovered.

You will, too!  Never ever doubt this!

 

Lizie 

[[Mo...]]

My pharmacist and therapist have proven to be benzo-wise.

 

I asked to have a meeting with my pharmacist to discuss compounded liquid to titrate from. I explained the difficulty I was having and she said that she has made capsules/liquid for many patients trying to come off benzo's and felt that going slow was the key to success. She also told me that one of her patients is now recovered and the others are still tapering but making good progress and healing on the way. She also agrees that benzo's are dangerous and should only be prescribed when all other options have failed.

 

When I was in acute, after dropping .50mg, I started seeing a therapist. I had seen this therapist before when I had gone through my divorce. I thought she was a good place to start because she knew me pre-benzo's. I had no idea that for 10 years she had been a drug and alcohol counsellor. He advice and guidance was invaluable. She told me that protracted w/d from benzo's was common and that healing DOES occur. My therapist had never counselled anyone who hadn't healed but that full recovery often took 1-2 years.

 

YES!!!!!  Just what I needed to read!!

[[Mo...]]

I have a great counselor who was a professor at a prestigious medical school.  He's in his 70's now and still counsels people.  He has worked with dozens of people in benzo withdrawal and even ran benzo recovery groups.  He also says that everyone heals from this in time.

 

He is very angry that benzos are given out like candy by clueless doctors.

 

Where in SoCal are you?  Who is the counselor?

[[Mo...]]

Adding my super, awesome report from the detox yesterday.  I am suffering excruciating hot flashes all day with panic, fear, flu sensations, no sleep, nausea, head and neck pain.  All this started in July after we returned from our vacation in July.  I am 10 months out.  This has been going on for 6-8 weeks now.  Here is my post from yesterday:

 

Hi Kids,

 

I'm back from the doctor.  I just couldn't take it another day.  Yesterday afternoon I felt like the flu had come over me and wanted to lay in bed for two days.  Then at 3am I woke in the sweat again, out of breath and panicked.  I woke my mom up asking her to promise this would go away and then laid on the floor near the couch she was on.  (She spends the night a lot when my husband travels).  I did all the stuff I know to do, but day upon day of panic is nearly impossible to stay ahead of.  I ran my favorite scriptures thru my head, then fell back to sleep at 5am.  Around 7:15am I woke in fear and actually celebrated because fear is much easier to head off.  Panic crushes your chest and takes away your breath.  It makes your heart pound and your head hurt.  I was thinking about Nova and his cool cucumber ride to the ER.  I just couldn't do that again and then the phone rang.  It was detox calling to get me in from a phone call I had made two days ago. 

 

I agreed and dressed in full make-up, hair dryed and straightened, bling on and the coolest black casual dress hanging in my closet.  3 year old in tow, I headed to Newport.  All the way there I was practicing what I would say.  It was frightening to think about what he would pronounce over me.  I was in full paranoid mode.  When I got inside the nurse I knew was really happy to see me.  She was a great support during my taper into post withdrawal.  I stopped going in February because felt I didn't really need them anymore.  She took my bp/ hr and told me I looked good.  I joked around and handed my little side kick his iPad.  My youngest has gone to all my detox appts, which is kinda funny.  He has no idea what a comfort it is to have him along. 

 

When the doctor walked in he gave me a big hug and asked how I was.  As I talked, he typed.  I told him ALL of it.  How my last wave was in June, but that I had also started experiencing 100% hours.  I told him about our vacation in early July and how my symptoms had kicked off after certain events... the feeling like being on the ocean, begin attacked by chiggers, nausea, burning head ache, gripping pain in my neck and back of my head, coming home and being in zombie mode for 3 weeks and then the terrible hot flashes all day and night, fear, panic, missed period.  I didn't leave anything out. 

 

His response:

 

You are very strong. 

This is where people relapse.  They can't take it. 

You speak to me about your symptoms so matter of fact and know how to distinguish between each of the emotions (panic, fear, anxiety, depression).  This is good.

This is all really amazing and I am learning from you. 

What you are experiencing is NORMAL. 

Symptoms can be random with no reason.  They come and go.  It's how you deal with them that matters.

Interruption of menstruation and hot flashes are absolutely withdrawal related and he believes all my blood test will come back normal.

The hot flashes are most likely panic related and this is how my body is reacting to this wave.

Withdrawal can take 1 to 1 1./2 years.  (I'm going with 2 years)

People have come in this far out in withdrawal and are as acute as the day they walked in to the office. 

Recovery for benzo is like a roller coaster. 

You are handling it the right way and I know you will heal eventually. 

You don't need to come back if you don't want to.

 

 

He then checked my heart and any other paranoid symptom I had.  He explained where my carotid artery was and that the clinching sensation in my neck is not the arteries but tension from the random 'deck of cards' stressful symptoms.

 

I told him I wanted to get my certificate and then work with him to help others like us.  He said I would be an asset.  We hugged and said good-bye.  I called my mom and husband then to tell them the good news.. THESE HORRIBLE AWFUL CRAZY I'M GONNA DIE SYMPTOMS ARE GLORIOUSLY NORMAL FOR WHERE WE ARE AT.

 

Day after day I was thinking about Peace going to work and how her doctors had reassured her.  I was embarrassed to be going backwards and not forwards and questioning everything like Life mentioned.  I didn't want to go in and have the doctor say what he did at the beginning of this process.  I was such a wreck and even in my random conversation with him that first day, I was so negative and inappropriate in my responses, that he pronounced life long medication for me. 

 

I knew it wasn't true.  I wasn't that negative person.  These drugs cloud who we think we are and how we process things around us.  It affects the very core of who we are, so of course it takes time to get back to normal.  It's just I needed an outside person to agree.  I needed someone I trusted like him, the doctor who I feel saved my life, to also agree with what we talk about on the boards.  AND HE DID. 

 

Everything others tell us, he said to me.  ...Keep going forward.  It takes a long time.  The fact that we have made it this far means we will finish the race. 

 

I love you guys, so much for being there and praying for me too.  For the hands reaching out to me when I think I am sinking and can only keep my head above water.  I was unable to see the water rising around my ankles in this one.  I've been treading water so long.  I needed some one who was knowledgeable on the outside and who knew me and what we all go thru to agree.  AND HE DID.

 

Go ahead and make peace with the symptoms.  Lay in bed or on the couch or get up and go for a walk.  Whatever you need to do.  There is still lots of time... 

 

MommyR

 

MommyR...thank you for this! 

 

What kind of certificate do you want to get??? That is great!

 

LovingMother, sorry I didn't see this earlier.  I want to get a CAADAC counseling cert.  It's for drug and alcohol addiction.

[[Mo...]]

My dr. who I educated on this is now giving presentations to the rest of the practice on teh dangers of benzos.  She defers to me as the expert.  She is using me adn someone else I referred to here from this site as case studies.  She says the level of denial is still high.  My primary doc in the same group emailed her I couldn't be having withdrawals out this far and it's anxiety.  I was angry but my doc said it's just they are not familiar with this and are learning.  Oh my! 

 

I refuse to modify all my typing errors due to benzo brain!

 

LOL Drew..

[[mi...]]

I do not know how to copy and paste so I will type this post as I thought it was very helpful to me.....

 

This is a quote from pamster

 

This is from Dr. Meliemis in Canada who specializes in this field

 

"Post-acute withdrawal usually lasts for 2 years. This is one of the most important things you need to remember. If you are up to the challenge you can get through this. But if you think that post acute withdrawal will only last a few mos., then you will get caught off guard....

 

How to survive Post Acute Withdrawal

 

Be patient. Two years can feel like a long time if you are in a rush to get through it. You cant hurry recovery. But you can get through it one day at a time.

If you try to rush your recovery, or resent post-acute withdrawal, or try to bulldoze your way through, you will become exhausted.

 

Post-acute withdrawal symptoms are a sign that your brain IS recovering. They are the result of your brain chemistry gradually going back to normal, Therefor dont resent them, But remember, even one year, you may only be halfway there.

 

Go with the flow. Withdrawal symptoms are uncomfortable. But the more you resent them the worse they will seem. you will have lots of good days over the next two years. Enjoy them. You will also have alot of bad days. On those days,dont try to do to much. Take care of yourself,focus on your recovery,and you will get through this.

 

You will go through days or weeks without symptoms and then one day you will wake up and your withdrawal will hit you like a ton of bricks...if you are not prepared for it, if you think post-acute withdrawal only lasts a few mos., or if you think that you will be different and it will not be as bad for you , then you will get caught off guard. But if you know what to expect you can do this.

 

Practice self care. Give yourself lots of little breaks over the next two years. Tell yourself "what I am going through is enough". Be good to yourself. That is what you MUST learn in recovery.

Sometimes you will have little energy or enthusiasm for anything. Understand this and do not overbook your life. Give yourself permission to focus on your recovery.".....

 

Another good reassurance that all of this is normal and that we will all heal....

 

Take care of yourselves everyone.....m