in despair after so called psych appointment

[[sp...]]

People making disparaging or snarky comments are just as useless as anything else in this thread.

[[...]]

This guy highwaydandy man is too self-absorbed and ****ed on benzos to get through to him. I used to be like this when I drank and took clonazepam... Man what a jerk I was. I definitely deserved all the friends I lost... Everyone stayed away from me. I see this guy's behaviour and see a part of myself I despise... I'm glad that part of my life is over. If I can do it, you can too.

 

highwaydandyman you should listen to the song The Outisder by A Perfect Circle (some of the lyrics:

 

You`re lying to your face again

Suicidal imbecile

Think about it put it on the fautline

What'll it take to get it through to you precious

Over this, why do you wanna throw it away like this

Such a mess, come to this, come to this

 

Disconnect and self destruct, one bullet at a time

What's your hurry, everyone will have his day to die

If you choose to pull the trigger, should your drama prove sincere,

Do it somewhere far away from here

 

Yeah, it's pretty blunt, but it's what everyone is trying to saying to you here, except some do it in a more empathetic and tactful and polite manner.

 

My advice? Go to a facility. You have a problem and are in extreme self-denial. Once you are clean off everything for say two months, you will understand how insane this behaviour and confrontation all is.

 

There is nothing else to be said at this point. This thread should have ended ages ago.

[[da...]]

This is my final post possibly ever. Saw gp today and apparently I am in such bad shape generally an ambulance is collecting me tomorrow at 09.00 for an indefinite stay in hospital. I could be admitted for up to 2 months and not just for benzo withdrawal.

 

I know i have pissed you all off in recent days and I am truly sorry for all the hurt I have caused. Apparently my liver is badly damaged so might need to go on the transplant list.

 

This is probably too little too late but I think I have lost my  mind. Again I am so sorry. If you feel appropriate please delete my account however I would like to post when I am well if I come out of hospital.

 

God bless And Good bye

Please forgive me. If the worst happens I will ask my brother to let you know.

[[To...]]

I wish you nothing but the best. God bless you and good luck

[[Ri...]]

Good luck Dandy 

[[Ho...]]

There no need for us to delete your account, Dandy. We all wish you a speedy recovery and look forward to hearing from you in a couple months when you are well. 

[[Pi...]]

I'm sorry that you are so ill dandy. I hope they can help you and I hope the journey won't be too tough. I wish the best for you. Go with a big hug Pinkee

[[da...]]

Pinkee

 

I just woke up the doctor gave me a sleeping tablet.

 

Thanks for saying such kind words after all that has happened. Please forgive me. I will try and post from the hospital if I can get ta signal and they let me. Looks as though Hope will keep my account open which is so kind.

 

I am not looking forward to this journey. At least my brother and sister are coming down this morning.

 

God bless

 

Dandy

[[fr...]]

Great idea! An easy way to do that is to check on the "show unread posts since last visit " at the top of the page and then scroll through them and find posts that only have 1 or 2 replies and see if you can offer some support or even bump it so that it gets more circulation. It is unfair that people who cause trouble on the site get more attention that the people who are desperate for support. And that is what we are all about, supporting one another. Not fighting and arguing with a few select members. Alabama.xo

 

I started doing this about a week ago when it became clear to me that the cycle was just going to keep repeating itself. No matter what anyone said the cycle of overdosing, asking for help, denial, angry outbursts at people who used tough love or just said the 'wrong' thing, hospitalizations, drinking, asking for account to be deleted, etc has repeated itself again and again and won't stop until Dandy gets the real help he needs. I truly hope he will be in the hospital for a very long time this time as that is the only way he will ever beat this. It is beyond the scope of this forum, and I regret that people who are really trying have been neglected. So.... on to the other threads.

[Guest [...]]

Sorry to hear you are so ill. I hope the people who have been bombarding you with vicious and judgemental comments feel the guilt they should. I am totally disgusted with many people on here. I am leaving myself. Right now.

[[On...]]

There no need for us to delete your account, Dandy. We all wish you a speedy recovery and look forward to hearing from you in a couple months when you are well. 

 

I second this. Wishing you only the best. Let yourself be cared for. 

[[da...]]

One love

 

Thank you are too kind after all the mayhem i have caused. I know that a lot of people are still angry and will never forgive and I don't blame them. All I can do is put my hands in the doctors and hope i recover back to my former self.  Here's hoping.

 

God bless One Love

 

Dandy

[[Di...]]

Dandy - I wish you well. I hope you are able to get the help you need. I'm sorry things here don't seem to be working out for you, and that some people have been less than kind. You need to find real-world help which we are not equipped to give you.

[[da...]]

Diaz-Pam

 

Yes you are right. Those people who have been less than kind and judgemental have every right to be so. I hope they get around the folks I think this forum was designed to serve. I probably deserve all the vitriol Frus expressed. I am sure that there are many members with similar views but I will have to live with that.

 

Take care

 

 

[[Sv...]]

Your health is your number one priority. Take care of it and get back on your feet!

[[Pi...]]

I know u must be so super nervous about your immediate future ... I know I would be.things look bleak at the moment but it's really just a beginning. A fresh start for u. I am glad your bro and sis are coming. You need all the support u can get.... We all do.

            Don't worry about what u have or haven't said, just start again. Pick yourself up and move forward. I don't hold grudges . Never have I ever held a grudge against anyone. So I forgive you and sincerely wish only good things for u in the future. Hugs Pinkee

[[da...]]

Thanks Pinkee,  that means a lot to me. You have been very supportive throughout the recent turbulent weeks.

 

Yes it helps a great deal having my brother and sister around. They will be here when the ambulance arrives. I have packed a lot of stuff because I fear I will be in for some time.

 

As long as I am home for Christmas!

 

God bless

 

Stephen

[[pr...]]

If you choose to pull the trigger, should your drama prove sincere,

Do it somewhere far away from here

 

what a great line--i wish i had written it

 

good luck Dandy! clonazepam is the bitch here but you can beat her! boom--boom!!

[[Pi...]]

Just pack light. U only need comfortable stuff. When ever it have been in hospital, including 1 month in a mental health facility , I always pack a single egg shell underlay.the beds can b cruel! I also pack a plush blanket. Something familiar and soft. Sounds silly but I find it helps me. Just a thought.

[[ma...]]

This guy is not sick. He's an asshole! Plain and simple. Doesn't anyone think he sounds a lot like a certain benzo buddies basher??

 

Morechocolate!  What you have said here  is clearly against our forum guidlelines. Please refrain from such comments moving forward. I think we should all move on from this thread, we have other members on the forum who need our support.

 

•Be polite towards, and respectful of, your fellow Buddies. We do not tolerate attacks upon fellow members.

 

Rules and guidelines:

 

Magrita

[[da...]]

Just wanted to say settled in hospital in own room with tv. I have been given some diazepam not sure how much but think 40mg. I think they have iv lorazepam on hand in case of seizures. Going to stabilise first before looking at liver next week.

 

PS Mods if you don't want me posting occasionally I will understand.

[[Mc...]]

Glad you are in a safe environment. It sounds like this is where you need to be right now. Take care

[[Br...]]

Just wanted to say settled in hospital in own room with tv. I have been given some diazepam not sure how much but think 40mg. I think they have iv lorazepam on hand in case of seizures. Going to stabilise first before looking at liver next week.

 

PS Mods if you don't want me posting occasionally I will understand.

 

Hello Dandy!  If I recall correctly, you were recently in hospital for 5 days for a stomach bleed.  A stomach problem means you were probably looked after by gastroenterology.  So I'm surprised they discharged you with possible liver problems because that is a speciality within gastroeneterology.

 

Anyway, I hope you get some much-deserved rest and good medical attention. 

 

[[Ho...]]

Just wanted to say settled in hospital in own room with tv. I have been given some diazepam not sure how much but think 40mg. I think they have iv lorazepam on hand in case of seizures. Going to stabilise first before looking at liver next week.

 

PS Mods if you don't want me posting occasionally I will understand.

Hello Dandy!  If I recall correctly, you were recently in hospital for 5 days for a stomach bleed.  A stomach problem means you were probably looked after by gastroenterology.  So I'm surprised they discharged you with possible liver problems because that is a speciality within gastroeneterology.

 

Anyway, I hope you get some much-deserved rest and good medical attention. 

 

 

I agree with Braban. This is very surprising to me as well.

 

As for you posting, Dandy. I don't see a problem with you posting as long as you abide by the rules of the forum. Please be respectful of our members. They truly do want to help but it becomes very difficult to do so when you  insult them.

[[da...]]

Hi hope

 

Thanks for responding. Yes they did an ultrasound before I was discharged mostly I think focusing on my stomach although the doctor commented that my liver was not great but no cirrhosis. I was also very pale. I think doctors are under pressure to discharge as soon as possible.

 

As regards posting I will keep to a minimum and I will abide by rules and just be happy to have an occasional polite exchange. I still seem to have a modicum of support from some buddies.

 

Thank you hope.

 

Take care