Driving in the Left Lane- pianogirl's Story of Healing and Hope for all of You!

[[Te...]]

WOW, what a wonderful success story, pianogirl!!! Amazing, simply amazing. You've been a tremendous help to me and to everyone here at BB, and you've moved on from the clueless doctors. Even though you suffered so, so much, you've turned around and have given your words of wisdom, strength, and positive feedback to all of us here because you've chosen to help others out of misery and pain. And that's a great blessing for everyone. Congratulations to you!!!

[[pi...]]

So happy for ypu Pg.. You have been a blessing to me...

Thanks for still being here to help us all..

Much love  rose

 

Dear Rose,

 

Your day will come and you'll post your success story here for everyone to celebrate along with you.  You can do this, I know you can Rose.  Thank you so much!!!

 

Love you,

 

PG 

[[pi...]]

WOW, what a wonderful success story, pianogirl!!! Amazing, simply amazing. You've been a tremendous help to me and to everyone here at BB, and you've moved on from the clueless doctors. Even though you suffered so, so much, you've turned around and have given your words of wisdom, strength, and positive feedback to all of us here because you've chosen to help others out of misery and pain. And that's a great blessing for everyone. Congratulations to you!!!

 

Thanks Terry,  I so appreciate all you've said.  Yes, I had to move on and leave all that behind and forge my own path to wellness since no one was going to do this but me.  This forum helped me so much, I simply wish to provide the same for others who are on this journey.

 

PG

[[Ja...]]

So happy for you. You are a wonderful person and deserve a drug and pain free life. Thanks for being there for me. I'm getting there, slowly but surely 

[[pi...]]

So happy for you. You are a wonderful person and deserve a drug and pain free life. Thanks for being there for me. I'm getting there, slowly but surely 

 

Hi ya Jazzy,

 

Just remember, even though it's slowly, it is most definitely SURELY!!

 

Thanks for stopping by and for the good wishes.

 

PG 

[[VC...]]

Aw, congrats, Piano Girl - and many continued blessings for you. Your story is a real hope-giver and inspires me to keep going. So glad you're here. Happy Anni!

 

V 

[[pi...]]

Aw, congrats, Piano Girl - and many continued blessings for you. Your story is a real hope-giver and inspires me to keep going. So glad you're here. Happy Anni!

 

V 

 

Thanks so much V!!!  Many times I went to the Success board in the middle of a difficult night and found a glimmer of hope, I'm simply trying to keep that light shining for others to see as I did.

 

PG 

[[No...]]

Thank you for being here. Thank you for your story. 

[[pi...]]

Thank you for being here. Thank you for your story. 

 

You are very welcome NovaScotia! 

[[ro...]]

You are a special lady..Much thanks..

lovely cyber friend..

[[pi...]]

You are a special lady..Much thanks..

lovely cyber friend..

 

You are special too, dear friend.  :smitten:

[[Co...]]

Finally read your success story PG- WOW that's awesome! We have so many similarities to the beginning of our benzo use. I too was told by my cardiac counselor the following "I did ask the doctor about the safety of taking clonazepam long term. He assured me that I would not encounter any problems because I didn’t have an addictive personality." So I took that as professional advise to use as needed thus rapidly escalating my doses!

 

I initially believe I was having sleep disturbances due to adrenal fatigue caused by constant brooding/stress over activities I couldn't do or do as well post-surgery as well as having my voice taken from me for months. Words can't explain how hard it was to go from the guy everyone knew entered the room because of my loud, excited voice to hardly being recognized. I felt very alone in a big bad world. I then made the mistake of talking about my sleep issues with a "professional" and was told to use my Alprazolam more and given scripts for Ambien and Effexor. This of course further increased my DP, sleep issues, stress and depression because I didn't want to have to take a pill to feel normal! I could have been over this much sooner if I'd just gave it time and not gone down the benzo trail! But, hindsight is 20/20 so I'll move on.

 

I'll constantly turn to your and many others success stories to keep me focused on the end result- I too want to drive in the left lane no longer worrying if an event, feeling or situation will trigger a panic attack! Thanks for sharing PG!!!

[[pi...]]

Finally read your success story PG- WOW that's awesome! We have so many similarities to the beginning of our benzo use. I too was told by my cardiac counselor the following "I did ask the doctor about the safety of taking clonazepam long term. He assured me that I would not encounter any problems because I didn’t have an addictive personality." So I took that as professional advise to use as needed thus rapidly escalating my doses!

 

I initially believe I was having sleep disturbances due to adrenal fatigue caused by constant brooding/stress over activities I couldn't do or do as well post-surgery as well as having my voice taken from me for months. Words can't explain how hard it was to go from the guy everyone knew entered the room because of my loud, excited voice to hardly being recognized. I felt very alone in a big bad world. I then made the mistake of talking about my sleep issues with a "professional" and was told to use my Alprazolam more and given scripts for Ambien and Effexor. This of course further increased my DP, sleep issues, stress and depression because I didn't want to have to take a pill to feel normal! I could have been over this much sooner if I'd just gave it time and not gone down the benzo trail! But, hindsight is 20/20 so I'll move on.

 

I'll constantly turn to your and many others success stories to keep me focused on the end result- I too want to drive in the left lane no longer worrying if an event, feeling or situation will trigger a panic attack! Thanks for sharing PG!!!

 

It's funny how we put our trust in someone, feeling that they have the knowledge and experience to do the right thing in treating our health issues.  Actually, it's not so funny when what they have done to treat us ultimately takes away the lives we knew and sends us down a very rocky road.  I also rued many times the day I walked into the ENT's office.  Now, I realize that no matter what, it can't be undone. It's a part of my life and thankfully now its in the past.

 

You'll move on and become wiser and more proactive about your health and what you put in your body.  You'll also get into that left lane and know that whatever life throws at you, you'll be able to handle.  That's the thing about withdrawal, everything else pales in comparison.

 

You are going to be fine and enjoy days, months and years seeing those lovely children of yours grow up. 

 

PG 

[[...]]

I will join you in the left lane as soon as I will be done with this beast...

[[pi...]]

I will join you in the left lane as soon as I will be done with this beast...

 

Yes you will be in that left lane, there is plenty of room for all our buddies here to drive along with me.

 

Hang in there, it will get better!

 

PG 

[[ro...]]

:smitten:

Love your rose

[[pi...]]

:smitten:

Love your rose

 

Love ya back sweet Rose!! 

[Guest [Ke...]]

Dear Pianogirl, I was diagnosed with a degenerative disc at the beginning of my tolerance withdrawal five years ago. I was prescribed a low dose antidepressant but soon stopped it! Please can you let me know if your low back pain disappeared alongside everything else? It's certainly been one of my most persistent symptoms.

 

Thanks for all you do and your encouraging success story. 

[[pi...]]

Dear Pianogirl, I was diagnosed with a degenerative disc at the beginning of my tolerance withdrawal five years ago. I was prescribed a low dose antidepressant but soon stopped it! Please can you let me know if your low back pain disappeared alongside everything else? It's certainly been one of my most persistent symptoms.

 

Thanks for all you do and your encouraging success story. 

 

Hello Beth,

 

My DDD was in my neck and due to the nerve damage that was affecting my left arm, I had surgery, fusion to arrest the damage.  My surgery was while I was still on benzos.  I've also had 2 shoulder surgeries as well while on benzos and during recovery.  I believe that withdrawal targets our most vulnerable places, our weakest spots.  My pain from withdrawal was always worst in those areas. All of this did go away when I healed.

 

I do think there are so things you can do to help DDD like physical therapy, acupuncture and massage.  The muscles get so tight and rigid in withdrawal, after all, they have lost the chemical muscle relaxer and have to learn to relax naturally. Sometimes, this can take a long time.

 

Thanks for your kind words,  I'm sorry you are still having a rough time.  Keep believing in your healing, the body wants to recover and will work towards that goal.

 

PG 

[Guest [Ke...]]

Thanks Pianogirl I believe it targets weak areas as well.

 

I was on the drugs for such a long time that I can't expect to heal quickly but however intense things get somehow I pull through and enter another stage of recovery. It really is an amazing process and I'm becoming a very different person as the new me emerges.

[[pi...]]

Thanks Pianogirl I believe it targets weak areas as well.

 

I was on the drugs for such a long time that I can't expect to heal quickly but however intense things get somehow I pull through and enter another stage of recovery. It really is an amazing process and I'm becoming a very different person as the new me emerges.

 

I firmly believe that when we emerge from withdrawal, it is with a new and improved self.  One wiser and more proactive about their health.  One who doesn't sweat the small stuff and finds something beautiful in every day.  This will happen for you as well.

 

PG 

[[pi...]]

Epilogue

 

Change is inevitable, life brings change every day. Sometimes small ones, others large. Some are good, others are not so good.  It's all part of life and living.

 

My life will be different for the next two months. The nanny that watches my darling grand daughter is having a baby and will be taking 2 months off for maternity leave.  My son and daughter in law asked me to take over during this time and I jumped at the opportunity.  I'm more than thrilled to spend these months bonding with her since she lives pretty far away so our visits are not very frequent.

 

Since I will be chasing a 3 year old around all day I won't have a lot of free time to devote to the forum.  Because of this, I won't be around too much and my role will be a BB Team Member instead of admin.

 

For everyone, there will be a time to move on. I thought mine would be much sooner but due to circumstances (shoulder surgery) and a sense of obligation and gratitude I have wanted to stay as admin to help in a small way. My time on the team first as a moderator and then as an admin has been therapeutic, rewarding, heartbreaking , enriching and fulfilling, sometimes all in one day.

 

Colin has done a great thing in keeping BB a strong force in the benzo withdrawal community and I will forever be grateful for the safe place he provided for me when I was lost and frightened. 

 

All of you are strong benzo warriors and will carry on and allow your bodies to heal and then reap the rewards of wellness. You will continue to support others in the kind and caring manner you have for so long.  That what makes this forum such a special place. 

 

There will always be a place in my heart for BB and for all of the wonderful people I have met here who supported me. I'll stop by when I can and perhaps return after my hiatus. 

 

PG  :smitten:

 

 

[[ro...]]

Piano girl.

Oh my..happy , so happy for you..the moments with your granddaughter will be precious.

I understand, but will miss you as you have always been here for me, lifting my spirits, coaching, supporting, encouraging and noting my day to day struggles with your humor, compassion..

When I doubt my self, your cheer me on..with my mom....you helped push me on.

Oh I know  you have volunteered your time...felt so much inside, helping me and others ...

I'm so grateful..please do stop in, I will miss you so..I'm sorry, I don't do changes well now...

Your friendship has meant so much..

Missing you already.

 

Hugs. Love, rose

 

 

[[No...]]

PG ... you will be missed here ... and you are welcoming a new chapter in your life ... all the best ... and thank you ...

[[pi...]]

PG ... you will be missed here ... and you are welcoming a new chapter in your life ... all the best ... and thank you ...

 

Thank you back NovaScotia!