How many people HAVE to work while tapering

[[et...]]

Lisa did you get my post re: how much Seriphos my wife takes?

e

[[lk...]]

Lisa did you get my post re: how much Seriphos my wife takes?

e

 

Yes E! Thanks.....Im thinking of ordering it...just scared to add something else. I worry that it will have some bad side effect or I will be dependent on it.......*sigh* How are you doing?

[[et...]]

Google phosphatidylserine totally safe and not addictive or habit forming in any way. Can take it for life if you want. Safe as water.

etown

[[lk...]]

Google phosphatidylserine totally safe and not addictive or habit forming in any way. Can take it for life if you want. Safe as water.

etown

 

Will do. I googled Seriphos and not much came up so will use that name. I have to say the last 2 nights have been decent. i haven't woken up every hour or two. I started taking my multi vitamin again and magnesium in the morning...then the melatonin and vit c at night. I have no idea if the added multi has helped but it seems to be. Prolly just a coincidence. I feel like I need a backup. I found an interesting study.....will post it here but you might have already read it. Its about the different types of insomnia.

 

http://www.moodcure.com/pdfs/Townsend-Letter-NNTI%20article.docx.pdf

 

see of that works.

 

What about gaba enhancers or supplements? Any opinions?

 

lisa

[[...]]

Hey, etown! Thanks for the invite to your thread. Man, where have I been? I didn't know this existed. I've got 78 pages to read through now;) I may be done with my taper but not with w/d symptoms. Work seems to be getting more difficult but I'm hoping this is just the result of another wave. Nobody at work has an inkling of any of this (I don't think so anyway) so I'm always trying to keep up appearances and that is exhausting. I'm sure you all can understand.

 

Anyway, let me catch up a bit and I'll be back;)

 

R

[[et...]]

Thanks for the visit Rosa and I hope you take up residence here for a while. These people know exactly what you are going through. We can always use another member on our working team. Need to prop each other up ya know.

Check us out

See you later

etown

[[...]]

Welcome to the working Benzo World Rosa!

 

I know what you mean about "keeping up appearances".  You have to be really careful not to let too much information out if you are in a position that it could cost you.  But, I find that having to work is making the time go by faster and gives me something to focus on besides tapering, and cutting, and symptoms and side effects.  Don't want to become and obsessive compulsive during this process, you know!

 

:laugh: :laugh:

[[et...]]

You know it never ceases to amaze me how stressed and busy I am right in the middle of my taper. I am running my butt off these last few months and the end will only come when the snow flies. So I apparently have another few months of this madness. I haven't worked this hard in my entire career. RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF MY TAPER! Murphy's law I guess. Tapering is hard.....tapering is hard while working.....tapering is even harder when tapering through a world war at work. Ugh...these Benzo's are trying to take me out. I don't know what to call an increase in symptoms anymore.

etown

[[...]]

Hang in there Etown!

 

I am experiencing the same thing unfortunately.  This time of year at work is usually a mellow cruise into the holiday season but a rush of new customers, new machine installations on the plant floor and new directives from Corporate have changed that for me.  Every time I turn around it is something and I just have to focus and stay calm so that I don't allow myself to get worked up and aggravate my progress.

 

So much easier said than done....right??

 

I feel ya dawg! 

 

I take frequent breaks and go outside to get some sunshine.  Just 10 minutes away from my desk in the fresh air usually provides a much needed distraction.

 

Be breezy! 

[[On...]]

etown, I'm truly sorry to hear you are having a tough time. . I wish there was something I could do to lighten your load. Please know that I am sending you all the best wishes for ease and comfort.

 

Eliz, it's a good thing you have found good ways to keep your stress levels down. I really do believe that getting worked up does alter our chemistry in ways that excite the glutamate receptors. Research shows that even 'thinking hard' cranks up the glutamate receptors. Since I found that out, I've been restricting the time I spend online and in research. I have even noticed the difference, at times, that playing a few mindless games of spider solitaire makes. I'm learning to be very careful.

 

I need some opinions on something. I am having crazy bad symptoms with even the tiniest daily micro tapers. I took 14 days to reduce from 2.90 to 2.80. My symptoms were so bad that I had to hold at 2.80 for a few days. When things were good again, I started dropping. At 2.76 now, I am having sudden extreme gut pain, stinging throughout GI, and nerve pains in ribs and thorax. IS THIS NORMAL? I'm back to no eat, no sleep from the pain and will have to stop and hold AGAIN.  It just seems unfathomable with such a slow and easy daily micro taper. I thought this was not supposed to happen when tapering this way!!  What gives??

 

Would I be better off to try small cuts and hold for a period? I'm wondering if I'm going to suffer anyway, maybe offloading the doses on the front end, suffering, but then at least having some period of normalcy before cutting again would be better than this everyday pain.

 

Can those of you who have done this both ways comment on my situation? I really dont know how I can make it down the long slide from 2.76 to zero like this every single day. In fact, I know I would not survive it because of my GI problems. Does anyone else get hit hard in the GI with withdrawal symptoms? 

 

Thanks Buddies, for your help. I feel so discouraged right now. Can anyone tell me it gets better?

[[et...]]

Thanks Liz and One - I have a good solid taper plan and feeling some better tonight.

 

One you have really been up against it. You are going to do this regardless. Look how far we have come since we first talked. Time is going by and you are making it. My opinion on cut and hold vs. daily taper is this. If I had it to do over again I would daily taper right from the start.  I agree with you that it will be very hard to deal with the taper plus the unusually intense GI symptoms as well. I haven't met anyone on BB that has the GI challenge you have. Once I get to your level I expect to be somewhere around .005mg/day. I haven't worked yours out but I would go very very slow with a few holds for 2 weeks mixed in. i'm glad to hear you are cooling it on the research. Your immediate focus really needs to be on your GI issues and then to the taper and back off on the details about other stuff. I know your challenges are really tough but you don't want to waste energy.

etown

[[...]]

Hi Onelove,

How long have you been on the daily cuts?  I found when I first switched from cut and hold to daily cuts (two weeks ago) I had a hard time adjusting to it.  I feel like I went from feeling like crap two to three days out of the week to feeling like crap every day.  This week is much better for me because I am actually still on the 5mg pills and decided to cut every other day instead of every day.  The net effect at the end of the week is the same as if I was cutting daily with 2mg pills. 

 

I wish there was something your doctor could prescribe to sooth your gut so you could get some relief.  When my mother was suffering from diverticulitis she described symptoms very similar to the ones you are writing about.  Is it possible that your doctor could check you for that, or pollups or something other than benzo side effects or have you already gone down that road?

 

I hope that you stabilize soon and can resume your tapering smoothly. 

[[ma...]]

Etown its modern institutions I'm afraid. Your over-work load sounds similar the staff I work with.

I cant imagine tapering if I had to work like that full time. You are a strong guy!

As it is I have just come back from a whole day of meetings and traveling back on the train was not a great experience.

Even so I am glad to be semi- back in the mayhem after a year at home.

And I did a of smiling and pretending things were fine.

 

 

Onelove- you poor thing! Gut problems are so disturbing because they hurt on so many levels.

I agree that research is not a good thing at times especially in withdrawal as it makes one think the worse.

if the pains get worse when you cut then you know they are withdrawal symptoms and will go eventually.

Have you tried EFT? It helped me when I had months of abdominal/ bladder pain and had run out of options.

 

best wishes to all

 

magga x

 

 

[[et...]]

Magga thanks - yes this past few months have been a stress pot for me. But, I'm still alive and well and tapering at the same time. Just when I'm about to make some adjustment I seem to snap out of it and keep going. One more day and we'll get a few days rest. And I have a business on the side that requires time. Glad i got the daily tapering with scales down to a science or I'd be screwed for sure. I have a few people that spoke and I listened and I am so grateful to them. Plus I am a practical thinker finally which helps also.

We'll get there a grain at a time

etown

[[et...]]

Ok workers, wanna be workers, former workers and the like. Another week is about to start. I've had a relaxing weekend. How about you? Had a little glitch today won't be pm'ing for a few months. But on a brighter note we still have this thread where so many people have found support for working and withdrawing.

Keep hanging in there for each other.

etown

 

[[On...]]

Ok workers, wanna be workers, former workers and the like. Another week is about to start. I've had a relaxing weekend. How about you? Had a little glitch today won't be pm'ing for a few months. But on a brighter note we still have this thread where so many people have found support for working and withdrawing.

Keep hanging in there for each other.

etown

 

Thanks, etown, for the check in and morale boost for the coming week. Glad you had a good weekend, PM glitch notwithstanding. We sure do need you here, so very glad you're sticking around.

 

I worked this weekend, blahhhh. Had to walk in and out of lots of real estate perfumed to the max which set off my multiple chemical sensitivities something awful. Did anyone else develop heightened sensitivities after benzo use? This is something all the GABA-glutamate disregulation disorders seem to have in common.

 

I also just had a long phone conversation with a woman I've not met before who has extreme environmental sensitivities and has been basically housebound for 22 years with numerous symptoms.  After talking about the neural disregulation issue with GABA and glutamates, I told her benzo meds exacerbate this and had made my MCS and GI issues much worse.  She  asked me to name all the meds in the benzo class. Seems she's been taking Klonopin for many many years and never knew it is a benzodiazepine. Never made the connection with all her other symptoms, including GI, even though she's seen all the best specialists in the nation and been hospitalized in Environmental Sensitivity Units before. We also discovered that, even though she's eliminated all environmental toxins in her home, she unknowingly eats a high glutamate and aspartate diet, including aspartame soft drinks, and isn't aware of hidden msg in foods. Twenty two years housebound!  Lost her career and any semblance of a normal life. Our kids are friends and she can't even come to her grandson's birthday party. I really detest benzos now more than ever before.

 

I long for the day when this information is more readily available to people and more common knowledge. How many of us must suffer from this beast before it is slain?

[[ma...]]

Hi fellow workers

 

I hope you are all bearing up!

 

Etown  Glad you got some R and R over the weekend.

OneLove -  It's great that you can work again! I have always been highly sensitive to smoke and chemicals in the air, but I think this process makes everything worse!

 

My weekend was not really relaxing, as I  worked rather a lot  on recent writing project. Actually I am really grateful for this work because it helps me to focus on something other than withdrawal. I did get out for some walks but try to make this part of my daily routine.

 

I'm teaching quite a lot this week and hoping I am up to the challenge. I really love seeing the students and get a buzz from it, but the commuting sucks.

 

This stage is proving interesting.  I am really low on the v now and plan to stop soon (but not making any firm date!). The days are very mixed.  I go from feeling quite cheerful or excited (this is normal for me) to states I don't recognise as myself but which feel highly uncomfortable. I have to mentally work hard to get through that patch and its okay again. This process goes on most of the day, but thankfully evenings are okay. As i already feel fine before I take my sliver of pill I know there is not much association. I am glad i have gone slow for the last 6 weeks but now I have to be strong and go through some proper healing time now.

I cannot say how grateful I am to have come across this site and  all you good people 

Heaven knows what I would have thought was going on with my head and body otherwise!

 

 

[[...]]

Hi Workers!

 

Magga how is your chest infection?  I hope it starts clearing up soon.

 

OneLove I am also sensitive to women who wear too much perfume - especially the cloyingly sweet varieties.  Sometimes I want to gag!

 

Etown I hope this is an easier week for you than the last few you have had to deal with.  I work 10 - 11 hours per day 5 days a week so by the time Friday comes I am usually wiped out and very fatiged.

 

I also had a relaxing stress free weekend.  I try to keep all my errands to on the way home after work so I do not have to deal with them on Sat and Sun.  Just rested up, did some chores around the house and cooked our meals for the week so I do not have to deal with "what's for dinner" every night after work!

 

Hope everyone's week is a good one!  :smitten:

[[et...]]

Eliz I will not be able to answer any pm's for a few weeks. I was a little zealous in my attempt to help someone. If you need anything I will be on this thread or the Valium tapering thread.

etown

[[...]]

Well Etown,

No good deed goes unpunished.  I'm sorry to hear that but we can keep tabs on each other here although I will miss our chats.

 

You keep your chin up and remember you are likely a hero to more than just one member here with all your help, guidance and cheerleading.

 

My taper is going well and if the half life valium theory is correct, I only have this week left to ride down my large cut and holds in the beginning of my taper.  After that I will be in daily cut territory and things should smooth out.  Here's hoping.

 

This will be a busy week for me but hopefully should go smoothly.  I hope your week is good too! 

[[et...]]

Eliz - thank you I really appreciate the support. Yeah I am pretty down over the whole thing but I am also a big boy and will turn this into something good somehow. I will be up and running in 2 weeks so hang around here and we will connect live. I am thrilled that you are doing well as I am too. I'm really going to miss our chats when you are off. I have a ways to go but 10mg is in sight.

 

This week is going to be crazy for me. Much of the intense work I do is between March and December. Maybe the winter will slow down.

[[On...]]

SOS.....

 

Holy moly, we just weighed the tablets I have left and their weights differ substantially from the first 20 we weighed, averaged the difference in weights, and based our calculations on. The difference is substantial enough that what I have "thought" to be my dose yesterday at 1.37 twice a day was ACTUALLY 1.29. So, thinking I was at a days total of 2.74 while I was actually at 2.58 is really throwing me for a loop. How can this have happened?  Why would there be this much difference in the weights of the tablets in the same bottle???  How do I know where I really am with dose and how do I calculate my next dose???  There's quite a difference in 2.74 and 2.58. 

 

I have no idea when and where in time my dosages veered off the rails. But I'm guessing it coincided with days that I spent in bed wracked in pain and not understanding why a .01 cut would make such a radical difference in one days time.

 

How can this be happening?  Should we be weighing each and every pill every single dose before cutting and weighing?  I badly need to salvage my faith in the daily micro taper method. I KNOW when it works right, it has to be the best. But......

 

[[...]]

Hi One

That's why an rx for liquid Valium is the preferred method by most who are able to tolerate the medium. I made my own home brew liquid mix but this will still vary somewhat also. I never hesitated to take just a little extra on days I didn't feel so jet hot in part for the measurement variation reason. Also, absorption rates and other dietary factors can mitigate. Conversely, when I felt great, on my next dose I would be conservative with my pull. As always, minimal symptoms was the goal and small dose variations never really concerned me. I think it helps not freaking too much over this and also being just a little loosy-goosy with your dosages as needed.

Bart

[[et...]]

One -  In my opinion weigh every pill if that is what it takes. Because of the total amount of V in my body I feel that small variations are covered from day to day, however, if you are concerned and at lower doses weigh each pill.

etown

[[...]]

Hi OneLove,

When I first got my bottle of pills they all weighed about the same.  Last week I noticed quite a bit of valium "dust" in the bottom of the bottle and am assuming that this is rubbing off the pills as the bottle gets "handled".  So I weighed some of them again and like you got much different readings than when I first started.

 

Because of this I am sticking with the weight of my first average taken.  So....since I already made my Excel spreadsheet showing what each .001 reduction would weigh I don't worry about if each pill weighs the same today as it did three weeks ago.  If the dose I am supposed to take today should weigh .040 on the gram scale based on the spreadsheet, I shave off .040. 

 

Also I have learned that this Gemini gram scale is a bit tempermental.  I calibrate mine each and every time I weigh out doses so that it is accurate every time.  I also try to make up my doses for the entire week so that at least 7 days are made at the same calibration and I won't end up with variations within the week.