The Long Hold Support Group

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Twiny your getting earlier every morning.l hope you are getting some sleep?l know you are working on your anxiety and l am so proud of you.Yiu have come so far and l know this withdrawal won't get the better of you.Look for the joy honey and hang on to the good times.l think what will always help you is getting out and living life.Yes l know we all want to isolate ourselves however it is the worst thing we can do.Keep going sweetheart you are amazing.Forgiveness isn't easy however l was in a situation where l had to forgive as the anger and bitterness was killing me.l think holding on to anger is toxic so l worked on it and l have to say l feel so much better.lt actually was a lot easier than l thought it would be.Such a burden lifted l have to say.Now have l forgotten what that person did? No however l have learned to react very differently.l hope you have a good day my lovely.love you my lST.X

Morning Feeling l am glad things have settled down a little.l just want to remind you how amazing you are.You have tapered 2 meds and you are still moving forward.That takes courage and strength.You will get through this my love and you will reclaim your life.Never doubt that for one second my love.l am taking a little me time so don't worry about that.Evening time l chill and that really helps me fuel up for the next day.Try to enjoy your day honey.love to you.X

Morning Suzy how are you pet pain easing any.Try not to overdo the exercises always take a day or two without exercise.You are doing well honey.love you.X

Morning Intend that is very interesting.l hope you have more information soon.lt would be great to find some way to decrease the glutamate so we will see if there is an effective treatment.I hope you have a peaceful weekend.love to you and Dan.X

. Morning lady Mary there are a lot of sites that sell goods on the internet 😋.Get our King to buy it when he is buying his dolls 😕.l think you should give it a try.lt could work so worth a punt.Try to enjoy your weekend honey and give Tim and Sly a hug from me.love you my lady Mary HenX.

[[St...]]

Well folks just dropped in to let you know all is much the same this end.l am heading up to the hospital and my daughter will be home later today.We will be heading out for a drive tomorrow so l won't be on.Hopefully will be back next week.Please look after yourselves and don't let the benzo lies get the better of you.

Love and hugs Stut X

[[Tr...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Twiny your getting earlier every morning.l hope you are getting some sleep?l know you are working on your anxiety and l am so proud of you.Yiu have come so far and l know this withdrawal won't get the better of you.Look for the joy honey and hang on to the good times.l think what will always help you is getting out and living life.Yes l know we all want to isolate ourselves however it is the worst thing we can do.Keep going sweetheart you are amazing.Forgiveness isn't easy however l was in a situation where l had to forgive as the anger and bitterness was killing me.l think holding on to anger is toxic so l worked on it and l have to say l feel so much better.lt actually was a lot easier than l thought it would be.Such a burden lifted l have to say.Now have l forgotten what that person did? No however l have learned to react very differently.l hope you have a good day my lovely.love you my lST.X

Morning Feeling l am glad things have settled down a little.l just want to remind you how amazing you are.You have tapered 2 meds and you are still moving forward.That takes courage and strength.You will get through this my love and you will reclaim your life.Never doubt that for one second my love.l am taking a little me time so don't worry about that.Evening time l chill and that really helps me fuel up for the next day.Try to enjoy your day honey.love to you.X

Morning Suzy how are you pet pain easing any.Try not to overdo the exercises always take a day or two without exercise.You are doing well honey.love you.X

Morning Intend that is very interesting.l hope you have more information soon.lt would be great to find some way to decrease the glutamate so we will see if there is an effective treatment.I hope you have a peaceful weekend.love to you and Dan.X

. Morning lady Mary there are a lot of sites that sell goods on the internet 😋.Get our King to buy it when he is buying his dolls 😕.l think you should give it a try.lt could work so worth a punt.Try to enjoy your weekend honey and give Tim and Sly a hug from me.love you my lady Mary HenX.

Hi my awesome twin!

Yes, I'm getting sleep. I usually get up very, very early like 4 or 5 have for years. Ever since my neice died in 2008 that's been my pattern. I think I would just crash early in the evening bc of depression at that time and wake early. So that's been my sleeping pattern since.

 

I can't tell you what your words have meant to me over the past year and a half. You'll never know how you have pulled me through so many hard times when I thought this isn't doable. Don't ever forget that you're a big part of how I got to where I am now. So I think if anyone is amazing it's you! It's you and all that you contribute to this group. You address everyone with your advice and wisdom. So I would venture to guess that you probably have touched a lot of lives here at the LHSG. Your support knows no limits, even in your darkest times with wd and your heavy responsibility with your poor dear sister you still have enough to give back.. Now that twinny is what I call amazing!!

 

I will continue to enjoy the heck out of everyday I'm able too. Wd can knock you down at times but when it looses it's grip somewhat during a hold well you'll find me at the mall with the mice and all spending Rich's 💵💲😂😂

I can't let this benzo beast have total control over my life. So I'll be wooping it up twinny when I can 💃

 

I hope you have a lovely day with your daughter. You deserve good days and enjoyment. You're a precious a gem around here and we all love and appreciate all that you give here ❤️

 

I hope sis comes home soon, sounds like this current storm is just about over 🙏

 

Enjoy your weekend my tiny Irish twin and know that you have a special place in my heart always! 😘

 

Love you much!

LST♥️

 

PS.. I will work hard on forgiving that dreadful former Dr if it kills me bc if I don't it'll still kill me. I agree with everything you said on forgiveness and I'm going to work very hard on that. I usually forgive pretty easily but considering I'm not going to get an apology from him this ain't gonna be easy. I think though with my faith in God he will get me there. 🙏

 

 

[[Gu...]]

Good morning LHSG.

 

Stut is so right.  It’s funny when you let go of anger you (almost) forget what you were angry about.  It’s certainly a lot more peaceful.  And I definitely have a ticket for you Stut.  That house is still waiting too.

 

Weather here is perfect.  Not too cold and not hot. 

 

I hope you all have a good Saturday.

[[De...]]

Thank you Stut!

I really have been slowing down. Still have the same pain. Did some stretches. I honestly cant belive it. Feel like I am hetting nowere. 

You sound better. Hope sis and your daughter are well and you too. Glad you took some me time. I agree with.the anger. It is so.hard. zThey say it only hurts you if you dont let it go. I.havent gotten to the point of praying for ppl.who hurt me. Thats a tough one. I temd to.hold grudges sometimes. Not good. Workimg.on it! Lol. Have a nice weekend and look forward to hearing from you when you get back. Love you Suzy

[[De...]]

Hey everyone!

Hope you are hanging in as best you can. Gp.hope your pt is eorking. This musvle pain is gettimg old ppl!! Trying to not fall back into the health smxiety. Glad you are feeling good tt. Hope you are having a mice day.  Ahaa i typed mice by accident

I am going to leave it! 

 

Mmmm,

Hope you are ok. I hope you heard from enso. Thinking of you always. Praying for some relief for you. I know how much it sucks! Love you Pebbles!

 

Hope everyone else is doing ok. We just keep truging along. Ugh l9ve yoy all...dd

 

[[ho...]]

Hello everyone, just joined yesterday and have been referred to different segments of BenzoBuddies. Learning a lot. Need help, however, in my tapering. Hope whoever wishes to reply to me can access my previous posts, so I do not have to keep reintroducing myself. Summary 3mg clonazepam for 13 years for anxiety disorders and epilepsy. My decision to get off Benzos. Neurologist introduced me to neuropsychiatrist this past August. Changed my 3mg clonazepam to 20mg Valium with weekly taper of 1mg.

Initially felt great. Fine until 14mg, started to get withdrawal symptoms, so went back up to 15mg for a 2 weeks. Got down to 12mg then 11mg BANG! Brutal withdrawal. Looked up symptoms. Classic. Went back up to 13mg felt better then tried the 12 again. BANG! again. Pharmacist suggested I stay at 13mg for few weeks to let my brain settle. This was only 2 days ago, 13mg is not making me feel better. Want to stick out the 13mg but want to know from my experienced Buddies, when do you know you're ready to reduce again? Also, will the 13mg work again like before? Will be talking to my neuropsychiatrist in 2 weeks. Have read the slower the taper the more successful, is this true. This is craziness!

[[Va...]]

Hello everyone, just joined yesterday and have been referred to different segments of BenzoBuddies. Learning a lot. Need help, however, in my tapering. Hope whoever wishes to reply to me can access my previous posts, so I do not have to keep reintroducing myself. Summary 3mg clonazepam for 13 years for anxiety disorders and epilepsy. My decision to get off Benzos. Neurologist introduced me to neuropsychiatrist this past August. Changed my 3mg clonazepam to 20mg Valium with weekly taper of 1mg.

Initially felt great. Fine until 14mg, started to get withdrawal symptoms, so went back up to 15mg for a 2 weeks. Got down to 12mg then 11mg BANG! Brutal withdrawal. Looked up symptoms. Classic. Went back up to 13mg felt better then tried the 12 again. BANG! again. Pharmacist suggested I stay at 13mg for few weeks to let my brain settle. This was only 2 days ago, 13mg is not making me feel better. Want to stick out the 13mg but want to know from my experienced Buddies, when do you know you're ready to reduce again? Also, will the 13mg work again like before? Will be talking to my neuropsychiatrist in 2 weeks. Have read the slower the taper the more successful, is this true. This is craziness!

Hi Horse Whisperer and welcome! 

 

I also started my taper at 20mg in 2015.  The key to tapering IMO is to taper slow enough that symptoms are kept to a minimum.  I started with big cuts and got into trouble (really nasty trouble) so I ended up holding for about 6 months as it took that long to stabilize.  Have you considered a micro taper with small daily reductions?  That is how I finally ended up getting off.

 

Reducing can be tricky as one reduction will go well and then the next hit hard.  Leave enough time for your body to adjust to the cuts.  Sometimes this can be 3 weeks to a month or longer if dry cutting.  Let us know how we can help.  --V

 

 

[[Ol...]]

Hi HorseWhisperer,

Welcome to the Long Hold Support Group! I'm so sorry you are suffering. We all can understand. First off, 3mg of Clonozapam is equal to roughly 45mg Valium, so right from the get go you were reducing. Cutting by 1mg a week is crazy fast, but unfortunately is what the medical profession seems to deem normal. There are some that can cut that fast, but most people cannot taper at that lightning speed without some serious problems. I would start by taking a look at the Ashton Manual:

https://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/

Read the whole thing and share it with your doctor, if they will read it.

If you can hang at 13mg I might recommending holding there until you stabilize, that could be weeks or even months. Another option is to updose to a level that you feel functional, and taper from there, much slower.

You were on these drugs for a very long time and you have cut your dose by 2/3 in just a few months, which is going to be very very hard on your body.

Hang in there! You will find lots of information on this site, some of it conflicting so just do your research and see what feels best for you.

 

 

[[In...]]

Intend,

Where are you? How did the Dr appt. go? It sounds like it was a good visit. Update us when you can.

Love to you Dan and Pepper,

TT♥️

 

Trish, that Dr. appointment went so well that I was amazed. My doctor isn’t taking any more patients for awhile. Says he’s been taking new patients at 24 per week. He has a waiting list of 10 patients for when he gets back from vacation in January. My next appointment for January is the 7th, and I already have one for December 4th. ❤️💚

 

He and another doctor who’s on clonazepam are looking in other medications to help lower the  glutamate  response. The other doctor volunteered to help as he himself is having a rough time with clonazepam.

 

I just haven’t had time all day to say a word because my iPad crashed and I was on the phone with Apple support for over an hour this morning. And then Mary called and the neighbor came to the door looking for Dans help. And then we had to have a completely new water softener system installed. Another busy day. 🌹🧡

Hi intend,

I'm glad the Dr appt. Went well. How interesting that the other Dr is on clonzapem. I wonder how he ended up on it 🤔

Well if he ever figures out the glutamate thing I'll be first in line to get the cure! But for now I'm doing well and I thank God. I think my faith in God has helped me tremendously and the people on the LHSG who have stood by me through thick and thin. So grateful for all of you here. I do have to learn to forgive my Dr. Forgiveness is never easy but necessary. My pastor did a sermon on it and the hardness of heart when holding a grudge. Since I am a true believer in God, forgiveness is a must. So that's on my new year's resolution to work with my therapist on forgiving my former Dr.

 

Sounds like it was quite a busy day for you my friend. A lot going on up there in Utah. I hope the water softener thing went smoothly and I hope Mary didn't upset you. Owning your own home is great but there's always these kinds of issues. Houses can be money suckers trying to keep them maintained.

 

I hope you and Dan get out to the movies soon. You two need a few hours of enjoyment with no phone, no neighbors and no adult kid problems. As for me I'll be cleaning today and some shopping to get done. I have church tomorrow then some Christmas expo Rich and I and the kids are going to. Then they all come back to my house after that for cake, it's my son's birthday on the 13 th. So we're celebrating Sunday. Here's a grown man and he still likes me to bake his cake so I will lol!

 

Also, how did your recent cut go? I hope that also went smoothly.🤞

 

Well sending my love up to Utah to you, Dan and Pepper and wishing all three of you a great weekend. 😘

 

TT ❤️ 🌹⚒️  🌶️

 

Hi Trish.

 

I guess I should take notes of my doctor appointments. So much information packed into an hour, and my doctor spends extra time past the hour with his patients; maybe not all, but some. I know he runs over with me anyway. But do you ever feel like you forgot something that was said or forgot to ask a question when you see your doctor or therapist? I know that happens to me a lot.

 

So this other doctor is retired. That I do know. Not sure what kind of a doctor he is, but retired. Not sure why he’s on clonazepam (guessing maybe bored and getting anxiety from that, maybe alone as a wife or loved one is gone and not working anymore so anxiety about that), but retired nevertheless and getting older. Another guess-possibly an ailment of some kind that another doctor put him on clonazepam to cope with the difficulties of that.

 

I’m just not sure because as I said the time goes fast, I didn’t  have time to ask, and I’d would never expect my doctor to go into all the details anyway. And frankly, it’s my appointment time so I want to talk about myself and my problems. For all I know, this doctors GP put him on clonazepam for the reasons I just mentioned, and as we all know, often doctors here in the US do not recognize the problems that come with benzos; even the psychiatrists.

 

Apparently, they are not looking to solve the problem of glutamate and response, but lowering the response which is of course our withdrawl sx. I’m not familiar with all these medications, but I doubt that I’ll be taking any of them. My doctor himself did say that he did not know know about withdrawl from them, so that right there is a no-go for me. I want off this drug and I think I’ll take the withdrawl over adding another med that I have withdraw from also.

 

It was a very busy day yesterday. I think I had mentioned that this past update on my iPad seemed to throw everything off, and the neighbor Paul had come over to look at it. He had said that these first updates in a series are usually “experimental,” and it looks like he was right as this thing just crashed. So that long conversation with Apple Support yesterday morning seems to have gotten it back on track.

 

And yes, they went through the workings of the water softener (test run, rather complicated as per Dan) and also did a check on the furnace. It was Dan, Blake , and Matt working together. It does take a lot of work to keep a house maintained. I often think a nice condo would be better, but I get arguments about from Dan. I tend to tackle problems as they come up as all this leads to so much speculation and then debate.

 

My cut so far seems to be like not much has changed. I just don’t know if there’s been enough time yet or if it’s because I’m cutting the same amount as the total dose goes down or if it’s the time factor. Time and patience as you say.

 

Mary is a constant drama, and I’m at the point of knowing nothing as it changes so much. TBH, I wish she’d never met this guy, as she’s always so miserable. That part is crystal clear. I don’t think I have anger with my first psychiatrist as she didn’t seem to get the benzo thing at all as neither did I. In fact I ask my doc now about her, and he’s been wondering also. He knows her, but hasn’t seen her in several years. She was very sick with a medical problem herself that required 2 surgeries. And she may be gone-either has died or gone back to Germany. She had moved from Research Park here to a small house in an expensive area that had tenants in the basement and her office on top.

 

Dan and I have driven up there but these roads are always being worked on, torn up, and worked on again and the last time we drove by, that street was blocked completely.

 

Well, see about the movie. I just saw Robert De Niro this morning on MSNBC and he was talking about the usual and his 2 new movies-The Joker and The Irishman.

 

Rushing again as Dan  is putting  pressure on me as usual to go to the Michaels craft store, and Walgreens has called again for a refill of another prescription. You and Rich have fun this weekend with all your plans.

🌹 🚂 🌶 🐾 🐈. 🧡💛

 

 

 

 

[[In...]]

Good morning LHSG.

 

Stut is so right.  It’s funny when you let go of anger you (almost) forget what you were angry about.  It’s certainly a lot more peaceful.  And I definitely have a ticket for you Stut.  That house is still waiting too.

 

Weather here is perfect.  Not too cold and not hot. 

 

I hope you all have a good Saturday.

 

GP,

 

Saw somewhere last week that you were wanting to know about the Mexican cook around here. He’s here and he is my hubby, Dan. Just updating you. ❤️

[[In...]]

Hello everyone, just joined yesterday and have been referred to different segments of BenzoBuddies. Learning a lot. Need help, however, in my tapering. Hope whoever wishes to reply to me can access my previous posts, so I do not have to keep reintroducing myself. Summary 3mg clonazepam for 13 years for anxiety disorders and epilepsy. My decision to get off Benzos. Neurologist introduced me to neuropsychiatrist this past August. Changed my 3mg clonazepam to 20mg Valium with weekly taper of 1mg.

Initially felt great. Fine until 14mg, started to get withdrawal symptoms, so went back up to 15mg for a 2 weeks. Got down to 12mg then 11mg BANG! Brutal withdrawal. Looked up symptoms. Classic. Went back up to 13mg felt better then tried the 12 again. BANG! again. Pharmacist suggested I stay at 13mg for few weeks to let my brain settle. This was only 2 days ago, 13mg is not making me feel better. Want to stick out the 13mg but want to know from my experienced Buddies, when do you know you're ready to reduce again? Also, will the 13mg work again like before? Will be talking to my neuropsychiatrist in 2 weeks. Have read the slower the taper the more successful, is this true. This is craziness!

Hi Horse Whisperer and welcome! 

 

I also started my taper at 20mg in 2015.  The key to tapering IMO is to taper slow enough that symptoms are kept to a minimum.  I started with big cuts and got into trouble (really nasty trouble) so I ended up holding for about 6 months as it took that long to stabilize.  Have you considered a micro taper with small daily reductions?  That is how I finally ended up getting off.

 

Reducing can be tricky as one reduction will go well and then the next hit hard.  Leave enough time for your body to adjust to the cuts.  Sometimes this can be 3 weeks to a month or longer if dry cutting.  Let us know how we can help.  --V

 

Horse whisperer, just saw where Olive Kitty addressed your post. I’m just going to add that to this by saying that some of your problems may be that as per Ashton equivalencies, 1 mg of clonazepam = 20 mg of Valium.

 

It does depend on on the equivalency one uses however as there are several, plus the individual. Just sounds like you started out tapering short of Valium whether it be the 45 mg or the 60 mg. In my opinion, 20 mg would not have been enough.

 

And definitely slow that taper down. 1 mg per week is a fast clip. Considering how fast you’ve been going, I think you’ve done well. Perhaps go to the titration area of the forum and get a slower schedule.

[[Gu...]]

 

GP,

 

Saw somewhere last week that you were wanting to know about the Mexican cook around here. He’s here and he is my hubby, Dan. Just updating you. ❤️

 

Oh you lucky woman Intend.  He sounds awesome.

 

I know what you mean about leaving the doctors office forgetting to mention something.  Now I go in with a list.  When my bf had to go see my doctor I made a list for him for his ailments.  They knew exactly who I was. 

[[Gu...]]

Hi Horsewhisperer

 

I agree with Valley and Kitty.  I use the DLMT method and cut very slowly.  I've found holding a month between cuts keeps worst symptoms at bay.  I like to be functional and living some kind of life.

 

Good luck and welcome to the group.

[[Gu...]]

Hi Pebbles.

 

I'm sorry you are still hurting.  PT has helped a lot. I actually can make it til 4 or 5PM before my back goes.  I put 2 of the home exercises on my Plog if you want to give it a shot.  We'll have to see how Mary's Shakti rug goes.

[[De...]]

Thanks gp!

I will check it out. I am glad pt is helping 

Mary says that rug is very relaxing.  These sx drive me nuts the way they leave come back. New ones add on. I cant figure it out.  ly Pebbles

[[Gu...]]

What new symptoms Pebbles?  Do you still hear music?  That one has finally left me (knock wood).  But I do still have tinnitus. And the afternoon back pain.

[[Tr...]]

Hi intend,

Your Dr sounds awesome. I wish he were mine.. Although I could do worse so I'll keep what I've got.

 

The whole water softener undertaking sounds complicated but seems the boys got the job done. Uhg.. houses they can give a big headache at times. We need to look into a new roof I think, but don't want to think about it! Condo sometimes sounds good to me too! Lol!

 

Your iPad.. Well I'm an absolute dumby when it comes to technology. I have no idea what I'm doing. I would need Rich or my son in law to handle that for me. Technology and math not my strong suit. 🤪

 

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you on your recent cut. These sneaky benzos just when you think you're in the clear or it's going well down comes the hammer. Well that's how it goes for me at least. I felt a little crappy today but more like I'm coming down with a cold.. We'll see. I'm not cutting again until after my NYC trip so if all goes well I'll cut another 1/8 of a pill 🤷‍♀️

 

Don't let Mary get under your skin. You just made a cut and you need peace well as much peace as you can possibly get! Let her figure out her own relationship problems. Hopefully, she will wake up and dump him.

 

I love Robert De Niro! He's a fantastic actor. Why don't you two go see the Irishman.. It's probably good especially with him in it. If you do go let me know what you saw and how it was.

 

I love Michael's! I swear Dan and I would get along great! We'd make great shopping partner's 😂😂

 

Love to you Dan and little Pepper 🌹⚒️🌶️

 

 

[[ho...]]

Thank you Valley Um and OliveKitty, for your wise advice. I'm definitely going to take it easy on the taper and be in control of it myself. I saw documentary with Lisa Ling where a young lady talked about the gradual liquid taper. If the dry taper does not work for me, specially with having the anxiety disorders (PTSD,OCD and General) and Epilepsy to deal with, the liquid may be a good route to take. Am learning so much from my experienced Buddies. Will keep forum utd and call for help, as I need it. Which I'm sure I will. Thanks again!!

[[Tr...]]

Good morning LHSG.

 

Stut is so right.  It’s funny when you let go of anger you (almost) forget what you were angry about.  It’s certainly a lot more peaceful.  And I definitely have a ticket for you Stut.  That house is still waiting too.

 

Weather here is perfect.  Not too cold and not hot. 

 

I hope you all have a good Saturday.

Hi GP, hope your day went well. ♥️

[[Tr...]]

Hi horsewhisperer,

Welcome to the group. You'll find some good knowledgeable people here. I'm not one of them ... but I have other talents  :laugh: I've been in this group for about a year and a half and I still need advice and help. People here are great and supportive.

 

Good luck with your taper.

Trish

 

 

[[Tr...]]

Hey Suzy Q, hope you had a decent day girl. ♥️

[[ho...]]

Thank you!!!!

[[Tr...]]

Mary 👀 I don't see you today  .. I hope you're ok. Just know I'm thinking of you. Wishing you better 😘♥️

TT, too many T'S ♥️

[[Tr...]]

Thank you!!!!