The Long Hold Support Group

[[va...]]

Off to watch big brother and bed  :sleepy:

[[Ma...]]

Hi all, oh I feel so bad I can’t keep up with everyone.  I probably should take notes 📝 for each persons posts.  I do read all of them but doing this group moves fast and from my phone it’s so hard.  Without knowing you guys I do care about each of you and I especially relate to the feeling of not belonging.  But I know that’s just my Benzo head talking shit to me.  I do rely on this group for my life to get me through this nightmare. 

I went out and did some errands.  I forced myself.  Latest symptom is jelly legs and I am so afraid they are going to collapse and start convulsing.  FEAR. 

 

Btw- I did read that “chewing the fat” thread and as a newbie to this it triggered me especially when Ms. Hill said her shit about seizures in her patent table.  I had seizures when I did a self imposed ct off Klonopin when I first started Benzo.  So I freaked the F out. 

 

I’m so sorry we are all going through this. 

 

Love ❤️ to you all. 

~meems

 

meems, that is really sweet that you want to acknowledge all of us, but don't worry about that.  As you are here with us longer, it will become easier because you will become familiar with everyone's personality.  You just take your time, jump in when you want.  We are not going anywhere.  And we already feel as if you are one of the gang .  We wish you weren't here but since you are, we are glad you are with us.  LY, Mary  . 💜😘😘😘😘

[[Ma...]]

Haha Janice,

You are funny 

 

Everyone belongs here. We are one big dysfunctional family and we will get thru together!!! 

 

That's us, but we maybe dysfunctional but we are here for each other  :smitten:

[[Ma...]]

Haha Janice,

You are funny 

 

Everyone belongs here. We are one big dysfunctional family and we will get thru together!!! 

 

Yes Suzy! I'm sorry you're still having bad waves. It will take time, but I know you'd get better. Three months ago I thought I wouldn't have one moment of feeling in control ever again, and now I have some, and so will you. I also eat sugar Suzy, I don't feel a difference unless I eat like a pig. I stay away from caffeine, alcohol, weed, cigarettes and sex. But the sex abstinence is not benzo related

 

You are sooo bad Trishy  :laugh:

[[De...]]

Haha! I really cut down on caffeine. I have caffene free diet coke and try to drink alot of water. No alcohol  omg..who could feeling this way  🤤 no.weed. Dont worry about sex. It isnt really that good when your in wd and pain..lol. Enjoy big brother and eckhart! Gnight love suzy

 

[[De...]]

Mm,

Did you get the rug? I hope so. I was reading about it

Kind of like acupunture. Bad pain day 

There has to be something that helps. Love pebbles 

[[Ma...]]

Haha! I really cut down on caffeine. I have caffene free diet coke and try to drink alot of water. No alcohol  omg..who could feeling this way  🤤 no.weed. Dont worry about sex. It isnt really that good when your in wd and pain..lol. Enjoy big brother and eckhart! Gnight love suzy

 

Val, I must say Eckhart and Big Brother are a strange combination   

[[De...]]

Hehe mmn lmaf!!

[[Ma...]]

Mm,

Did you get the rug? I hope so. I was reading about it

Kind of like acupunture. Bad pain day 

There has to be something that helps. Love pebbles 

 

It wasn't in the first group but it's here now.  Will report tomorrow.  Gosh, wouldn't it be a miracle if it helped.  OMG. Tomorrow, I will lay it over the massage table and lay on it, with the pillow that comes with it.  And yes, I have taken a few ibu, I can only stand so much pain and finally say screw it. 

LY, MM 💜💜

[[Tr...]]

Trishy you're very funny 

 

Maybe you could plan a visit for a second opinion . Yes, bwd magnifies all our insecurities and fears. I'm glad the shakes have left you. I always wonder if Angela Merkel is in bwd. She's been seen shaking in public a couple times.

 

Have a good day Trish.

I'd love to come. Maybe we could do a two for one session with your psychiatrist he might need the benzos after an hour with the both of us! 😂😘

 

Now I have to check out Angela Merkel 

 

Trishy we can't kill the man before he gets us off the benzo!! You'll be OK. Your daughter works with doctors and your therapist has some resources she says. Plus, you're stashing so this would give you TIME to find another doctor. If all else fails, you visit mine. A box of Valium here is 2.5 euros alprazolam would be similar. My doctor charges 60 euros the visit, and I guess he would treat you because I would translate. But you'd have to come every two months so let's make that your last resource.

:2funny: deal! You're my back up plan# 3 

[[Tr...]]

Haha! I really cut down on caffeine. I have caffene free diet coke and try to drink alot of water. No alcohol  omg..who could feeling this way  🤤 no.weed. Dont worry about sex. It isnt really that good when your in wd and pain..lol. Enjoy big brother and eckhart! Gnight love suzy

I drink two mini cans of diet Coke a day and man do I look forward to them! 

I drink diet decaf all the day long.. Not like the good stuff but it'll do 

[[Tr...]]

Me too Trishy. It is so hard. Some days im ok  and others its so hard . I start the what ifs and after Im a basketcase i realize what i did. We just have to practice and catch ourselves like you said. 

Yup you and I have that in common.. She actually wanted me to keep a sticky note that she wrote the word stop on somewhere in my house where I can see it as a reminder not to go there.

We gotta push those thoughts out. She also wanted me to look at how far I've come and not dwell on how far I have to go. I try to do that.

Ahhh well practice, practice, practice 🤦

[[Tr...]]

Good night peeps hope you all have a restful night. I made the huge mistake of accepting an invitation to a movie tonight with a friend of mine, and it's a movie I've already seen 👱‍♀️🔫 don't know what I was thinking!! I'm usually in pajamas after dinner and I go to bed by 9:00 .. oh I'm so stupid sometimes 🤦

 

Love to all,

TT, Too many T'S and too stupid at times 😏

[[De...]]

Mm,

Did you get the rug? I hope so. I was reading about it

Kind of like acupunture. Bad pain day 

There has to be something that helps. Love pebbles 

 

It wasn't in the first group but it's here now.  Will report tomorrow.  Gosh, wouldn't it be a miracle if it helped.  OMG. Tomorrow, I will lay it over the massage table and lay on it, with the pillow that comes with it.  And yes, I have taken a few ibu, I can only stand so much pain and finally say screw it. 

LY, MM 💜💜

[[De...]]

Oh it would be s miracle!! I am praying it works. I understand sbout the ibuprofin. I couldnt take it anymore either.  Cant wsit to hear sbout the rug..love ya Pebbles

[[De...]]

Good tips tt!! I look forward to that diet coke too!! Ahhhh

Have fun at the movies. No candy!!! Lol.

Love ya dd

[[Va...]]

This may sound ridiculous, because it probably is, but.....

A while back, maybe two years ago, a buddy named Valley Um, also known as “V” was a major mentor on this LHSG. HE LEFT AFTER JUMPING OFF OF VALIUM. AND I HAVENT HEARD ABOUT HIM SINCE. I SUPPOSE AND I HOPE HE IS LIVING A WONDERFUL LIFE WITH HIS CHICKENS that he spoke of so often.

 

Well he is one of the buddies that helped to save my life here on this support group.

 

And just by the very slightest chance that he may pop up and be reading on the forum now and then, I’d just like to say.....

VALLEY UM,  it’s me Heathcliff...I walked off my valium last week and I’m doing fine! I don’t know how to reach you to thank you for all that you did to support and help me through the toughest and scariest time of my life, but in case you are reading this.....

 

THANK YOU VALLEY UM! 

( Do you remember, when I first came to the LHSG, I thought you were a woman!

That was a laugh!

HEATHCLIFF ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Forever grateful!

Hi Heath!  I responded to your PM.  I’m so glad you made it to the other side!    Now we can do the happy dance together! 

[[va...]]

Me too Trishy. It is so hard. Some days im ok  and others its so hard . I start the what ifs and after Im a basketcase i realize what i did. We just have to practice and catch ourselves like you said. 

Yup you and I have that in common.. She actually wanted me to keep a sticky note that she wrote the word stop on somewhere in my house where I can see it as a reminder not to go there.

We gotta push those thoughts out. She also wanted me to look at how far I've come and not dwell on how far I have to go. I try to do that.

Ahhh well practice, practice, practice 🤦

 

Trishy and Suzy I do the what ifs constantly. It's a thinking pattern that comes with a crappy childhood when every day something bad happened. I also want to work on this. I love the post it note stop trick. Eckhart videos are also helping tremendously. Let's get rid of the catastrophic thinking together the three of us 

[[va...]]

Stutt, if you're lurking, I wish you a happy morning and a great day. I hope you're recovering from all this that's happened in your life lately, and that you can go back to some kind of routine, waking the doggies and helping out everyone like you do, but not forgetting you need to take care of you first and foremost or else you won't be well for everyone else. How's your beautiful daughter doing in her new life in a different town and living with BF? I hope she's got a good one. I wish I could do the preselection of BFs for my daughter when the time comes, or girlfriends, you never know in these modern days.

 

Here were all struggling as usual, some more than others. Trishy had some shakes due to last cut, Mary and Suzy are in excruciating pain, Intend struggles with the generic changes and can't stabilize, Bill seems to be doing pretty well, Gilly is not posting, hope she's OK, GP was posting and sounded happy to me but we never know if we're really ok or just trying, olive kitty is doing well with her taper, meems is struggling with sxs and hoping the hold will help, there are some new ones that I can't tell if the trouble is benzo related or remeron related, final healing is feeling a bit better I think, lookinup I think is still struggling not knowing if the sxs are from the fast remeron taper or klonopin tolerance wds, and everybody misses you but we know you need to take a break, from us and from everything!!

 

 

[[St...]]

Stutt, if you're lurking, I wish you a happy morning and a great day. I hope you're recovering from all this that's happened in your life lately, and that you can go back to some kind of routine, waking the doggies and helping out everyone like you do, but not forgetting you need to take care of you first and foremost or else you won't be well for everyone else. How's your beautiful daughter doing in her new life in a different town and living with BF? I hope she's got a good one. I wish I could do the preselection of BFs for my daughter when the time comes, or girlfriends, you never know in these modern days.

 

Here were all struggling as usual, some more than others. Trishy had some shakes due to last cut, Mary and Suzy are in excruciating pain, Intend struggles with the generic changes and can't stabilize, Bill seems to be doing pretty well, Gilly is not posting, hope she's OK, GP was posting and sounded happy to me but we never know if we're really ok or just trying, olive kitty is doing well with her taper, meems is struggling with sxs and hoping the hold will help, there are some new ones that I can't tell if the trouble is benzo related or remeron related, final healing is feeling a bit better I think, lookinup I think is still struggling not knowing if the sxs are from the fast remeron taper or klonopin tolerance wds, and everybody misses you but we know you need to take a break, from us and from everything!!

  Morning Janice you are a darling catching me up.You missed an important person how are you?l really do hope you are doing a little better honey.My wee girl is thriving thank goodness and her bf is lovely.Oh trust me l met some pricks along the way but he is a good one.l don't take much to do with it as she would just push against me however she has a good head on her shoulders and she has worked it out on her own.l have always let her make her own decisions and if she tells me something l will ask her if she wants my opinion.l think we must step back and let them find their own way.l have found that the hardest thing however it is getting easier.

..I am ok l have kinda decided l am going to hold until after Xmas with all the stress etc l don't want to add anything else into the mix.l am a little disappointed however life has to be lived and l will do what is best at this time.

  How is your daughter?Has she settled into her new class? Give her a big hug from me.l really hope you have a good day my love.Love you.X

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Intend thank you for the info.l don't have time to read the thread but l will.Sadly she sounds very narcissistic so l don't think l would have got on with her at all.ls there a taper that suits everyone? No we all must find our own path.l see you have an appointment with your doctor soon let us know how it goes please.l hope your cut goes smoothly honey.Love to you and Dan.

  Sorry  have just received a phone call from the hospital have to see the doctor.Was hoping to talk to everyone.All ok this end.Thinking of you all.love you all.Keep on keeping on.X

[[va...]]

Thank you Stutt. Yes, she started on Monday and they're already in exam period. She's just arrived and is already doing exams so I tell her to try her best but not to freak out if she fails something because given the circumstances it could happened (she's never failed an exam but they have content that she didn't have in the previous school). The social part has started on a good foot but it's too soon and time will tell. I hope she'll be "grand" like you say. Yes I stay away from telling her who to go with, we've all been thirteen and it's an age in which you need to assert yourself against your parents opinion so it's better not to interfere much. I'm lucky though, because she asks for my opinion often. Sometimes she says I'm so smart and sometimes she says "oh mom you don't have a clue, you wouldn't survive at school these days" lol. I'm sorry you're feeling disappointed. Who wouldn't. In Spain we say "no hay mal que cien años dure" (no hardship lasts for one hundred years). Yes it's a dumb saying but it means things get better eventually and they will.

 

Love, Janice

[[In...]]

Stutt, if you're lurking, I wish you a happy morning and a great day. I hope you're recovering from all this that's happened in your life lately, and that you can go back to some kind of routine, waking the doggies and helping out everyone like you do, but not forgetting you need to take care of you first and foremost or else you won't be well for everyone else. How's your beautiful daughter doing in her new life in a different town and living with BF? I hope she's got a good one. I wish I could do the preselection of BFs for my daughter when the time comes, or girlfriends, you never know in these modern days.

 

Here were all struggling as usual, some more than others. Trishy had some shakes due to last cut, Mary and Suzy are in excruciating pain, Intend struggles with the generic changes and can't stabilize, Bill seems to be doing pretty well, Gilly is not posting, hope she's OK, GP was posting and sounded happy to me but we never know if we're really ok or just trying, olive kitty is doing well with her taper, meems is struggling with sxs and hoping the hold will help, there are some new ones that I can't tell if the trouble is benzo related or remeron related, final healing is feeling a bit better I think, lookinup I think is still struggling not knowing if the sxs are from the fast remeron taper or klonopin tolerance wds, and everybody misses you but we know you need to take a break, from us and from everything!!

 

VNM,

 

Great sum up of buddies here!

 

I’m not sure how you’re doing that because I sure can’t, but you did great once again!

[[Ma...]]

Hey Intend, how are you II?  And your wonderful Dr.  Are you feeling any better?  Thinking about you .  MM 🐱🐾🐾🌹🌹🚂🚂🚂

[[In...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Intend thank you for the info.l don't have time to read the thread but l will.Sadly she sounds very narcissistic so l don't think l would have got on with her at all.ls there a taper that suits everyone? No we all must find our own path.l see you have an appointment with your doctor soon let us know how it goes please.l hope your cut goes smoothly honey.Love to you and Dan.

  Sorry  have just received a phone call from the hospital have to see the doctor.Was hoping to talk to everyone.All ok this end.Thinking of you all.love you all.Keep on keeping on.X

 

Stut,

 

I do hope you have time to read the thread on Chewing the Fat. I thought it had finally ended, but then others chimed in after me. Colin seems now to have answered in a way that put thread “to bed,” as another trouble maker showed up, and he had good information that this person was someone who is another Jana Hill “fanatic,” and had opened and closed 3 accounts under different names.

 

So the thread is sinking lower on the list of topics on Chewing the Fat, but I think still a “should read” topic as it does show that not only does Jana Hill not know what she is doing, but also shows that she does have somewhat of “cult like “ bunch of followers here on BB, and they are rather persistent.

 

I would like to say myself again, that Jana Hill should start her own forum back up again and stop hiding behind all of her followers, but it’s been said already by others also.

 

Yes, I do have my doctor appointment today, and I will let everyone know how that goes, and the cut is done also, but as Janice says, I cannot really stabilize as people being on one manufacturer through their taper because I’m dealing with several manufacturers, and last night I made a mistake. I will talk about that in my next post.

 

Here’s hoping your sis is doing better day by day, and not only will you get more rest yourself, but will also do better day by day. 🌹🐈 🚂 🌶.  🧡💛