12-24 months and up support group

[[La...]]

Thanks LD for your kind words but these bad times are beyond bad. And then I start to feel human again and think I’ve made a big fuss!

I know I’m not the only one living through this ordeal…….well not living, more enduring!

Love to all.

Hardy x

Yezzz that’s how this goes. I laugh at it. And yes we are enduring this. Keep your head up, sweetie. I’m cheering you on to better days remaining. Love u Hardy!

🌹❤️

[[La...]]

Hello everyone new and old!  I am an oldie benzo buddie now that I am “celebrating” 36 months off Valium in a few days.  I cannot grasp how I have been at this for three years!  In looking back at my calendar, I can see I have made some significant progress, but am also amazed that I still get taken down by a nasty wave every now and then.  I am now in a wave of about six days, and am not sure why this wave has come around to drive me slightly insane?!?!  Could it have been the hair dye last Tuesday, maybe high blood pressure which put me in the hospital for a day last week, or maybe going off sugar as I adopt a healthier lifestyle (or maybe none of those or all of those.)  I have booked a phone consultation with Baylissa next Friday, just to have her calming voice give me some reassurance.  I have learned that trying to figure out why we can get thrown back into a wave after some glorious months of windows, is pointless.  However, I am prone to trying to figure it all out!  Baylissa can at least steady the nasty benzo brain from going into overdrive. 

 

As always, I suffer with some pretty significant head issues, from headaches to head pressure, to buzzing and tingling. I went almost two full months with virtually no symptoms and let me tell you, it was like heaven opened up its gates and ushered me in! 

 

In our part of the country…..Mid-Atlantic…..we have been having some really weird weather patterns set in:  We go from warm days to cold windy days and everything in between.. I read an article yesterday that said because of global warming, we can expect an earlier pollen season lasting about ten days longer than previous years.  This is happening all over the United States in varying degrees.  In February I went through some dry eyes and sinus issues which have abated somewhat.  My doctor keeps telling me that anytime the barometric goes low, it brings on my headaches.  Nice to know but does nothing to get me through the pain!

 

How is everyone else doing?  I saw on instagram that Joey was in the hospital and was given a bunch of meds he did not need and is not doing well as a result!  He has suffered horribly and I am afraid his spirit is broken at this point. 

 

Would love to hear from any and all as we continue through this weird and often time painful journey!  At least we are all healing!

 

Hugs😍😍😍😍🙏🙏🙏🙏

 

GG

Hey GG! Well…..that two month window says a lot! Soon it will be a permanent window! Right now it’s practicing for it  I’m getting some practice with mine too lately. I’m 33 months today! Woooooohoooo. And happy 36 months to you, GG! Well done!

I’m not sure about the wave crash reason but it could be no reason at all. They just happen like that sometimes. Especially at the end of this. And you’re definitely at the end of this road.

I’m so excited for you…me…everyone! Good hearing from you again.

All my love to you! Hang in there because you’ll be back to good very soon.

🌹❤️

[[La...]]

Hello to all my buddies,

 

LadyDen,

I'm afraid I've never pulled out of the wave I was in it just seems to be constant and I'm having a wave within a wave. Lots of suffering happening. I'm getting close to the 34 month mark in 10 more days. Sure hope it means some brighter and better days ahead for me with healing. Thank you so much for asking.

 

Hardy,

I'm sorry to hear that you're suffering. I know you had some good windows and that's great! It's such a blessing. I'm sure another window's on its way. Just hang tough. This whole thing just isn't easy in any way.

 

GG,

I'm so sorry to hear that you're in a wave again but I'm sure it won't last long. You get those glorious windows and I'm sure one is coming just around the corner.

 

I don't know who Joey is. But I'm sorry to hear that.

 

Sending big hugs to all!

 

LiveLife

Wow! I’m sorry dear. But some people’s recovery is like that. Especially this far out. They have sucky months and then suddenly one day…Heavenly windows open wide. And majority of the time stay open ! I’m sure you’ve read about some of the former buddies doing that?

So until your big window open, you keep self care on the forefront and know you’re doing your best.

Happy few days early 34 months to you! Looks like we’re all turning another month around the same time.

I’m 33 today. GG is 36. And you’re 34.

 

We got this! We’ve come a long way and we’re closing in on that finish line for sure! Regardless of how we feel. I’m excited for us!

❤️🌹

[[La...]]

GG,

 

Thank you for the encouragement. I have gotten little blips here and there off and on. That was a pretty good one though it was the best 1 I've had since last May. So let's hope it means something.  My symptoms do the same thing. One minute they're raging and the next minute it's gone and another one has popped up. I'm doing my best to keep going. Hugs!

LiveLife

Yay!!!!! I’m shouting and dancing for you, Live!

Ok come on windows….more! More! More!

[[La...]]

Congrats to you for three  years. I want to be there for you for your final healing.  :smitten:

 

Kanoba

Hugs Kanoba! How are you?

[[le...]]

Hope you are all doing OK. Still struggling from effects of the flu jab. 33 months since stopped the AD’s just hoping one day will wake up and a miracle will happen and brain will start repairing itself. Haven’t been eating much so least looking pretty slim😄

[[Ha...]]

Ah well Leann, we have to look for the positives in all this……slim is good, lots of pretty clothes for the summer!

Saw my Psych today, she wants me to start on Pregabalin, a low dose of 25mg.

Any thought?

Hardy x

 

[[He...]]

Hi all,

 

This is just a quick hello and check in.  I'm not on the board too much lately.  I'm just focusing on my up and down healing and trying not to be on the computer too much.

 

Happy 33 months Lady Den and happy 36 to GG!  You are both so inspiring and tough.  LD, I love hearing you are better and know you will continue to improve and move on with your life and your loves!  GG, I truly think your 2 month window is like LD said....it's getting close to the finish line for you.  Thanks for always encouraging others here no matter how you feel yourself.

 

Kanoba, Live Life, Jordan Jack, Leann, Hardy, J Ben, Decatur, Jb, and Fire I'm thinking of all of you.

 

I'm ok. I just had a very, very nasty and miserable wave that lasted close to 9 days with very little relief.  Man, it was depressing and debilitating.  But yesterday was a bit better and today is a bit better than yesterday so my hope is being restored. 

 

Sending good thoughts to all of you!

 

Helen

[[le...]]

Ah well Leann, we have to look for the positives in all this……slim is good, lots of pretty clothes for the summer!

Saw my Psych today, she wants me to start on Pregabalin, a low dose of 25mg.

Any thought?

Hardy x

 

 

My husband saying I’m getting too thin, only a size 10 to start with. If you try it be interested to know how it goes a low dose sounds sensible. I’ve ordered some of cannabis oil, see if that helps. I don’t know anything about pregabalin so can’t help sorry x

[[Li...]]

Hello to all my beautiful buddies,

 

LadyDen,

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement they're greatly appreciated. I have to hang on to those thoughts that I could be getting close. I have had tiny little blips of windows but the suffering is just so much more than I could ever imagine. The little windows don't really make up for it. But I'm just hoping there are good sign.  This evening I had a little break instead of being the worst of the worst it was just awful. And I thought OK maybe things are improving and then it all just came back.  Then I get very frustrated and sometimes I get angry and have a meltdown. Unbelievable! Try to stay positive most of the time but sometimes I just give in.

 

It sounds like you've been doing quite a bit better and I'm so happy to hear that.  Before we know it you'll be posting your success story.

 

Helen,

I'm sorry to hear you had a wave but it sounds like you're pulling out of it which is wonderful. Hopefully tomorrow will be even better for you. Hugs! LiveLife

[[La...]]

Hi all,

 

This is just a quick hello and check in.  I'm not on the board too much lately.  I'm just focusing on my up and down healing and trying not to be on the computer too much.

 

Happy 33 months Lady Den and happy 36 to GG!  You are both so inspiring and tough.  LD, I love hearing you are better and know you will continue to improve and move on with your life and your loves!  GG, I truly think your 2 month window is like LD said....it's getting close to the finish line for you.  Thanks for always encouraging others here no matter how you feel yourself.

 

Kanoba, Live Life, Jordan Jack, Leann, Hardy, J Ben, Decatur, Jb, and Fire I'm thinking of all of you.

 

I'm ok. I just had a very, very nasty and miserable wave that lasted close to 9 days with very little relief.  Man, it was depressing and debilitating.  But yesterday was a bit better and today is a bit better than yesterday so my hope is being restored. 

 

Sending good thoughts to all of you!

 

Helen

Thank you Helen. Great to see you posting again. I’m so sorry about your wave. Glad it seems to be breaking now. What a shame this process is so crazy like that. You’ll be back to better days soon. I’m sending you much love. I’m here if you need me…always. Thank you for encouraging others even when you don’t feel well. You’re a jewel 💎

[[La...]]

Hello to all my beautiful buddies,

 

LadyDen,

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement they're greatly appreciated. I have to hang on to those thoughts that I could be getting close. I have had tiny little blips of windows but the suffering is just so much more than I could ever imagine. The little windows don't really make up for it. But I'm just hoping there are good sign.  This evening I had a little break instead of being the worst of the worst it was just awful. And I thought OK maybe things are improving and then it all just came back.  Then I get very frustrated and sometimes I get angry and have a meltdown. Unbelievable! Try to stay positive most of the time but sometimes I just give in.

 

It sounds like you've been doing quite a bit better and I'm so happy to hear that.  Before we know it you'll be posting your success story.

 

Helen,

I'm sorry to hear you had a wave but it sounds like you're pulling out of it which is wonderful. Hopefully tomorrow will be even better for you. Hugs! LiveLife

Yes that’s really frustrating. It’s like being teased. But you keep hanging in there because I heard practice makes perfect. Your brain is definitely practicing! 

Thank you, Live. I can’t wait to post my success story. Wow what a journey!

Love and hugs to you. 

[[de...]]

Hello to all......  Even though I have not been posting on here in the last several months, I am reading your posts and thinking about you all.  I am hanging in there!    In a bit of a wave at the moment, but hopeful it will pass soon.  My waves seem to go on for several weeks.    The waves are definitely less intense!  That is the good news.  I was three years off on March 15.    Never dreamed it would be this long.

 

Lots of love to all my buddies!

 

Lisa

[[Li...]]

LadyDen,

Thank you so much for your positivity and encouragement. Yes it is very frustrating but I'm hanging in there and hoping that these are all positive signs and I'm gonna be taking a turn for the better very soon. Have to hang on to that thought. And I wanted to congratulate you on 33 months! Quite an accomplishment.

 

Lisa,

So good to hear from you. And it's great to hear that your waves have had less intensity sorry that you're in a bit of a wave but hopefully won't last too long. Congratulations on 36 months way to go! I'm a couple months behind you and hoping I turn a corner soon.

 

Hugs! LiveLife

[[le...]]

Just had a really bad reaction to cbd oil, had like a seizure, very shaky, felt was going to pass out. Shame as meant help anxiety. From now on just have hope my brain will eventually recover. Felt like after I had flu jab, so I’m obviously very sensitive to everything😩

[[de...]]

So sorry, Leeann.  Yes, it does seem like you are very sensitive to lots of things.  Keep moving ahead!

 

[[Ra...]]

Hi All

 

Question for the folks who have reached the 18 to 24 mark. I usually get in a wave. Lasts 10 days and they are hard but I make do. I have been in a 3 week wave and it has been brutal. Today by far the toughest. I feel like acute. I’m coming up to 15 mos and cannot believe it. Today was just major suffering. Bad headache, anx, panic, feeling sick. Most of the symptoms have just hung in here. It’s making me think I’ll never heal. Can anyone share some of their story. Did you feel better later. It’s scary and I’m feeling like this is as good as it gets. I know better but sure could use some reassurance!

Thanks you !

[[Du...]]

I can't sleep,have visual flashbacks non stop (non ptsd) ,nauseated, brain conjure non stop images n thoughts . It seems im permanently injured and can never recover. I'm so severe..someone pls help.

[[La...]]

Hello to all......  Even though I have not been posting on here in the last several months, I am reading your posts and thinking about you all.  I am hanging in there!    In a bit of a wave at the moment, but hopeful it will pass soon.  My waves seem to go on for several weeks.    The waves are definitely less intense!  That is the good news.  I was three years off on March 15.    Never dreamed it would be this long.

 

Lots of love to all my buddies!

 

Lisa

How wonderful to hear from you again, Lisa! I was hoping you were completely healed by now but your right there at it! Happy 3 years to you! Well done! I never dreamed it would take this long either.

Sending you lots of love and hopefully this is your last wave!

🌹❤️

[[La...]]

LadyDen,

Thank you so much for your positivity and encouragement. Yes it is very frustrating but I'm hanging in there and hoping that these are all positive signs and I'm gonna be taking a turn for the better very soon. Have to hang on to that thought. And I wanted to congratulate you on 33 months! Quite an accomplishment.

 

Lisa,

So good to hear from you. And it's great to hear that your waves have had less intensity sorry that you're in a bit of a wave but hopefully won't last too long. Congratulations on 36 months way to go! I'm a couple months behind you and hoping I turn a corner soon.

 

Hugs! LiveLife

:smitten: :smitten: Thank you sweetheart! Hope you’re feeling better.

Be encouraged!

[[La...]]

Hi All

 

Question for the folks who have reached the 18 to 24 mark. I usually get in a wave. Lasts 10 days and they are hard but I make do. I have been in a 3 week wave and it has been brutal. Today by far the toughest. I feel like acute. I’m coming up to 15 mos and cannot believe it. Today was just major suffering. Bad headache, anx, panic, feeling sick. Most of the symptoms have just hung in here. It’s making me think I’ll never heal. Can anyone share some of their story. Did you feel better later. It’s scary and I’m feeling like this is as good as it gets. I know better but sure could use some reassurance!

Thanks you !

Hello Ranch! Glad to have you join us Yearlings. To answer your question…yes I experienced the 2 year “ doozy”! It made me feel like I was back in acute for a little while but when it did fizzle out,I felt much better windows and my waves were less intense every since. IMO I think the brain just kicks up the healing or it finds an area that needs more repair so it goes in hard to do it. It’s not surprising that we feel that. But just know you’re NOT back in acute. You WILL get better. This IS temporary. It WILL pass. Until then self care, eat clean, take walks and distract.

Hugs! 

[[La...]]

I can't sleep,have visual flashbacks non stop (non ptsd) ,nauseated, brain conjure non stop images n thoughts . It seems im permanently injured and can never recover. I'm so severe..someone pls help.

Hello Duck! Welcome 🤗

I know you’re struggling and don’t feel good. I’m sorry. But it is part of the process. It sucks, I know! Do you keep yourself distracted during the day? Have any hobbies? Outdoor walks or just sit on the porch? It helps to engage in something to keep the focus off the symptoms. I hope you feel better soon. Only time will do that. Hang in there!

Hugs 🤗

[[La...]]

Helen and others I’m sending you all my love. I hope you’re doing well. Enjoying the spring. Having fun. I miss you all very much!

I’m still doing well. I have bigger waves thrown in but they’re bearable. One fine tuning going on. Which is great because that means much repair is happening. I’m reminded that this is like going to the gym to build muscles to get fit. The weights/ exercise has to first tear your muscles to make them stronger. It’s hard. It hurts sometimes but must happen. The end result is you’ll be FINE, good looking and reap the benefits from it. So these waves and symptoms suck but they serve a purpose. In time we’ll be ok…then better…then good… then fine!

 

Let time prove your thoughts wrong that you won’t heal 

Don’t listen to the benzo bully’s lies.

 

[[De...]]

Hi everyone, really struggling . I'm almost 18 months snd I feel worse alot of times. Is this normal. I can barely do anything with this dpdr and distorted hesd stuff. I'm getting so down. Hope you are sll doing ok today.  We csn do this

[[le...]]

Hello to everyone glad some of you are recovering. Can only describe it as living hell at moment. Really don’t think I’m going to recover from this anymore, brain feels burned out. With mental symptoms you look normal so hard, trying to appear like I’m not completely  psycho which is what I feel. Don’t know how much longer I can do this with no respite, please pray for me. Wish I could go back on zopiclone and have a life.