Who's Healing??? "No Benzos"

[[be...]]

Checking in at 11.5 months and I'm 90% sure I'm going to heal by month 18 things are really coming along and the torment is really going away.i feel normal again I just got a lot of sensitivities now but even those are getting. Ate 2 junior bacon cheeseburgers and curly fries and Jack and only felt kinda off for 4 hours back then it was the whole freaking day of panic. So yeah doing a lot better. Life is good again.

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Great to hear from you Beans. Glad to hear you’re doing better bud

[[Ca...]]

Great news, Beans!! The MSG from the bad food may have made you not feel well. WD or no WD, MSG will make you feel awful. Do you have an in n out near you? MSG free!! Don't eat MSG - can't stress that enough.

[[Ca...]]

I took a yoga class today - worst in the class by far, but I didn't fall over. Success.

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Checking in on this crew...how’s everyone doing?

[[be...]]

I notice the withdrawal comes in stronger if I don't sleep or have orgasms . I've been having combinations of both and it really sucks to say the least. I'd avoid orgasms while going through it always ends in glutamine surges for me.

[[To...]]

I do feel like things are definitely changing. Very slowly but I know I’m getting better. It’s so hard to judge because of the windows and waves pattern but things are getting clearer... it’s so strange in a window bc it’s so tough to remember what the waves actually are like but you know they’re coming... I’m just hoping my baseline improved and things will continue to get easier... still ver difficult to deal with any outside type of anxiety triggers

[[Ca...]]

Fucking hate the anxiety, Tommy. I've been doing yoga everyday. Then I feel shaky for a few hours, but hey - I would probably feel shaky anyway. I don't pee as much, but that in turn made me gain weight - so - I don't know how I feel about that. hmmm. My psych symptoms come and go - and I find myself at times wanting things - like success, a better life, clothes, etc. 5 months ago I wanted NOTHING, no friends, no social life, nothing - I was done. So I guess it's good - to look forward to something. Hope we can all look forward to being healed

 

[[Pa...]]

4 months since jumping. The last month I've been feeling pretty good. The only complaint was Tinnitus, inner nervousness and feeling bloated. Yesterday I took a supplement for the Tinnitus and in the evening I took a probiotic to help the bloating. This morning I woke a little early but worst I woke up feeling anxious and breathing heavy. Also, still have the Tinnitus, inner nervousness and bloating. I think it  was the supplements but today I will not be taking them. I honestly thought I was healed!

[[...]]

Nice PaulMar. Sounds like you’re doing well. I’ve been able to workout the past 4 days...sometimes I HAD to because I was ready to jump out of my skin...but I still have energy that came to me about a month ago.

[[...]]

I had a good day today... tinnitus was soft, could think clearly for the most part.  still feel "off" but want to kick up this thread.  How are you all doing?

[[ma...]]

Nice to know you had a good day, T1D! Mine was also nice. I think I'm finally stabilizing at 38% my initial dose, which means I should be healing

 

One month ago I could not move one finger without screaming because of the pain, but today I could organize my stuff, had a two-hour work meeting and then spent another two hours shopping. Now I feel tired but have no significant pain. I'm going to hold for one or two more weeks and then resume my tapering.

[[Be...]]

I'm healing!  My insomnia has been improving which makes me so happy and hopeful.  I'm sleeping many nights of 6-7 hours the past 6 weeks, still broken sleep.  My other symptoms are lessening or disappearing.  I like reading how others are healing too!! 

Have you tried Melotonin? 10 mg seems to do the trick for broken sleep.

[[He...]]

Just a quick note. I just got back from the ER. They found a kidney stone which explains the pain. Funny thing was I could barely talk but all I said was "No Benzos" over and over again until I settled. At first I thought this was WD kicking in but this time I can't blame it. There's no way I would have made it through this a month ago. I think it's important that we log our short term success on the forum so it's not always so doom and gloom. So with that said.... who's healing???

 

Every cloud (the kidney stone) has it's silver lining (that you could get through this).  Sometimes we just need to look for it with the right (compassionate) frame of mind.  It gives me joy to see you find the positive in this.  :thumbsup:

 

fwiw - I slept 7 hours last night (very rare for me).  So I'm feeling pretty good today. 

 

Praise the days that we are able to get a good nights sleep. I'm on my third consecutive night with no sleep and I feel like I'm about to lose it. It's so frustrating. I think that I'm going to have to resort to taking a benadryl if I can't get to sleep tonight.

[[He...]]

I had a good day today... tinnitus was soft, could think clearly for the most part.  still feel "off" but want to kick up this thread.  How are you all doing?

 

I've been better, my day was filled with lots of unpleasant thoughts and self deprecation that I can't seem to shake. I'm normally a REALLY happy person. But I can't believe that I've been stuck in this hell for 6 months and I likely still have a long road ahead of me. I think that I would be okay if I had some good days but lately t's been all I can do not to give up.

 

For the sake of our membership, all references to self-harm and/or harming others have been removed from your recent post.

Please click on this link if you are thinking about suicide, self-harm, or harming others: Self-Harm/Ideation (Revised)[/i]

[[...]]

I had a good day today... tinnitus was soft, could think clearly for the most part.  still feel "off" but want to kick up this thread.  How are you all doing?

 

I've been better, my day was filled with lots of unpleasant thoughts and self deprecation that I can't seem to shake. I'm normally a REALLY happy person. But I can't believe that I've been stuck in this hell for 6 months and I likely still have a long road ahead of me. I think that I would be okay if I had some good days but lately t's been all I can do not to give up.

 

Yes, suicidal thoughts...though they are not your real thoughts, certainly are disturbing- to put it mildly, or down right horrific to be honest. I had them almost constantly for 2-3 months. They don’t come as often now... know that they aren’t yours and they WILL stop for you soon.

[[He...]]

I had a good day today... tinnitus was soft, could think clearly for the most part.  still feel "off" but want to kick up this thread.  How are you all doing?

 

I've been better, my day was filled with lots of unpleasant thoughts and self deprecation that I can't seem to shake. I'm normally a REALLY happy person. But I can't believe that I've been stuck in this hell for 6 months and I likely still have a long road ahead of me. I think that I would be okay if I had some good days but lately t's been all I can do not to give up.

 

Yes, suicidal thoughts...though they are not your real thoughts, certainly are disturbing- to put it mildly, or down right horrific to be honest. I had them almost constantly for 2-3 months. They don’t come as often now... know that they aren’t yours and they WILL stop for you soon.

 

Thanks T1D, I appreciate the reassurance. What month of recovery are you in now? Have you noticed emotions coming back? I'm scared that when my emotions start coming back that it actually might make me worse for a while. I don't want to combine this feeling like constant crap with a hair trigger feeling of irritation.

[[...]]

I used to fear stuff like that too...just like you’re saying, but it occurred to me that I don’t have a choice in the matter so what’s the point of worrying. Granted, I’d still worry, don’t get me wrong...but realizing that, coupled with the fact I’d walk through hell to heal (we basically are anyway) kind of took the edge off of THAT particular thought. My negative thoughts were intrusive, they’d just find they’re way into my consciousness. Brutal stuff, but youll make it out. No matter what it takes.

 

For the sake of our membership, all references to self-harm and/or harming others have been removed from your recent post.

Please click on this link if you are thinking about suicide, self-harm, or harming others: Self-Harm/Ideation (Revised)[/i]

[[He...]]

I used to fear stuff like that too...just like you’re saying, but it occurred to me that I don’t have a choice in the matter so what’s the point of worrying. Granted, I’d still worry, don’t get me wrong...but realizing that, coupled with the fact I’d walk through hell to heal (we basically are anyway) kind of took the edge off of THAT particular thought. My suicidal thoughts were intrusive, they’d just find they’re way into my consciousness. Brutal stuff, but youll make it out. No matter what it takes.

 

Have you gotten close to healing completely?

 

[[...]]

If I where to bet...hopefully I’m 6 months away from totally healing. I’ve definitely had days where I felt like I could be healed in a month...and days where I felt I’d never heal and I’ll be this way permanently. I’d set the over under at 6 months away (13 days away from 8 months down.) but who knows. I could turn a corner tomorrow, or fall back into the black hole. But my baseline has def gotten better. THAT is for sure.

[[Be...]]

If I where to bet...hopefully I’m 6 months away from totally healing. I’ve definitely had days where I felt like I could be healed in a month...and days where I felt I’d never heal and I’ll be this way permanently. I’d set the over under at 6 months away (13 days away from 8 months down.) but who knows. I could turn a corner tomorrow, or fall back into the black hole. But my baseline has def gotten better. THAT is for sure.

Looking at your bio, I see tinnitus hit at Month 7; that's very "WTF." Did all of the other symptoms hit during initial few days?

[[He...]]

If I where to bet...hopefully I’m 6 months away from totally healing. I’ve definitely had days where I felt like I could be healed in a month...and days where I felt I’d never heal and I’ll be this way permanently. I’d set the over under at 6 months away (13 days away from 8 months down.) but who knows. I could turn a corner tomorrow, or fall back into the black hole. But my baseline has def gotten better. THAT is for sure.

Looking at your bio, I see tinnitus hit at Month 7; that's very "WTF." Did all of the other symptoms hit during initial few days?

 

Is it common for new extreme symptoms like this to pop up later in withdrawal?

[[To...]]

Having a very good day symptoms wise...

 

Went to the gym and burned 800 calories on the elliptical in a hour.

Went in the sauna for 15 minutes after to sweat it out.

Went after to organic food place for lunch and had fresh greens juice blend and açaí bowl.

 

Best day in awhile all said and done....still a long way to go but here’s to healing 

 

PS: Let’s try to just keep this thread to the victories no matter how small. We all need each other because we all know the brutal reality when symptoms ramp up.

[[...]]

Nice Tommy!

[[gi...]]

Good going Tommy!