Who's Healing??? "No Benzos"

[[To...]]

Yeahhhhhh buddddyyyyyy Benzo!! We need to keep up the positive vibes because even in the waves we are healing. I’ve never tried yoga but I know the gym I go to has free classes. I just gotta get my sleep schedule down before I try. Love this cold turkey crew

[[Ca...]]

So encouraging to hear everyone's stories!! So happy for everyone!

TD did you take yourself

To the ER alone? Windows and Waves are like stock market...

when did everyone get their energy or motivation back?

 

 

[[dr...]]

Hey everyone.

 

Clocking in here with a good 16 month story!!

 

I'm feeling firm effects of being off and healing at this point. A month ago I might not have said it.

 

It's a milestone for me.

[[be...]]

Yeahhhhhh buddddyyyyyy Benzo!! We need to keep up the positive vibes because even in the waves we are healing. I’ve never tried yoga but I know the gym I go to has free classes. I just gotta get my sleep schedule down before I try. Love this cold turkey crew

Definitely try it Tommy. It gives you a totally chill buzz. Feels super relaxing. It needs to be mandatory to try yoga during benzo withdrawal.

[[...]]

So encouraging to hear everyone's stories!! So happy for everyone!

TD did you take yourself

To the ER alone? Windows and Waves are like stock market...

when did everyone get their energy or motivation back?

 

Yea...this wave of fatigue/fear came over me. I could barely talk. I don’t know how to explain it.

[[Ca...]]

bumping this - anyone feeling well this weekend?

[[...]]

Hey everyone.

 

Clocking in here with a good 16 month story!!

 

I'm feeling firm effects of being off and healing at this point. A month ago I might not have said it.

 

It's a milestone for me.

 

Congrats...Can you tell us more details about your healing Drad Dog?

[[2t...]]

bumping this - anyone feeling well this weekend?

 

At close to 8 months.

Yesterday I had a good day, went for lunch and saw people in the afternoon then dinner in the evening, meet some friends later and even had one beer.

Slept pretty solid for 8 hours last night and woke to much less anxiety than normal, also tinnitus level is down today so feeling rather good.

I think I am in a wave/ window pattern at the moment, the waves aren't really bad but are annoying and can do a real number on my mood.

 

2trusting 

[[Pa...]]

Hi Caligirl and all,

 

Having an awful weekend but it's good to hear that we are healing. I'm at 10 weeks since jumping and I know I'm getting better. Last week was pretty good and two weeks before was also pretty good. Unfortunately I can never get used feeling crappy. My throat closes up, breathing gets shallow, anxiety spikes up, tinnitus and I lose all hope. A totally awful feeling and that's why I'm searching the site for answers and support. I know it will pass but going through it is awful.

[[dr...]]

Hey everyone.

 

Clocking in here with a good 16 month story!!

 

I'm feeling firm effects of being off and healing at this point. A month ago I might not have said it.

 

It's a milestone for me.

 

Congrats...Can you tell us more details about your healing Drad Dog?

 

I felt about the same all through my taper and for well over a year, after.  It can be frustrating.

 

But a lot happened in my family recently, losing my step dad and mom in a year. I had to deal with a lot of stuff immediately, and it came at between 1-15 months after jumping when I was really looking for some improvement.

 

I like cannabis. I had a hell of a time over my taper trying to be good to myself and have a little pleasure in life.  I decided to not worry about limiting cannabis for now and try to get through all my family events without worrying about how depressed I feel when I stop it. I'm postponing stopping for a while while this plays out. I'm taking a drop of CBD oil most days.

 

I feel stronger, able to getup earlier, my dreams are more vivid and productive emotionally.

 

I only did one thing per day when I went out for the last 3 years. Now I do a couple of things.

 

I recognize the catastrophic mode that comes and attaches itself to your mind. It's a lot more fluid and adaptable now for me. There is life after this! You have to know this.

 

You start to remember the kinds of little thoughts, feelings, old childhood memories and notions that were very important, but didn't have names to them. They come back and you can't find the words for how great it is. How did they disappear for 4 years? It's enough to give me the belief for sure.

 

I also have had lots of muscle and joint pains and for a couple of months I have been doing 1/2 hour of exercises I got from my past PT therapies, daily in front of the TV, in addition to any other exercise I do. I cannot emphasize how important this will be. You can't be on your back for years and get out of it easily.

 

The stresses have been a test and it's let me know that healing is occurring. I don't know how it would be if I had not gone through this. But there's no mistaking the progress.

[[Ca...]]

So sorry about your mom and stepdad - that's tough. xo

[[...]]

I had a beautiful window last night for about 3 hours. The 3 days prior where a horror show. We’re gonna be alright.

 

Get this thread going again. Anyone feel a little better?

[[be...]]

Not me I feel like I'm entering a mild wave I've had 2 massive nosebleeds in 12 hours and I feel the fatigue and violent intrusive thoughts coming in. Sucks man.

[[2t...]]

I am pretty sure I am getting better but the morning anxiety and feeling weak along with tinnitis make it hard to be upbeat.

Just read a post where Ashton suggested 12 months is a turning point, I am enterimg month 9 so fingers crossed.

Could be much worse though as I am able to do things and infact this week have been in Florida with friends.

 

2trusting

[[...]]

Not me I feel like I'm entering a mild wave I've had 2 massive nosebleeds in 12 hours and I feel the fatigue and violent intrusive thoughts coming in. Sucks man.

 

Shit. Ride it out man.

[[...]]

I am pretty sure I am getting better but the morning anxiety and feeling weak along with tinnitis make it hard to be upbeat.

Just read a post where Ashton suggested 12 months is a turning point, I am enterimg month 9 so fingers crossed.

Could be much worse though as I am able to do things and infact this week have been in Florida with friends.

 

2trusting

 

That’s great 2t, what improvements have you noticed?

[[vi...]]

I am seeing improvements taking into account how sick I was. Still in bad shape but improving.

 

Hoping for a better month 4. The slow motor function and dizziness really disturb me.

[[...]]

That’s great news Virek. It gives you real hope right?

 

I had like a 90% window yesterday. I felt almost normal mentally. I could talk, and joke. I was confident. I finally had some energy, I went for a 7 mile ride on my airdyne bike. I’m definitely healing.

 

It’s crazy up because I though I was going to die just 5 days ago.

[[2t...]]

I am pretty sure I am getting better but the morning anxiety and feeling weak along with tinnitis make it hard to be upbeat.

Just read a post where Ashton suggested 12 months is a turning point, I am enterimg month 9 so fingers crossed.

Could be much worse though as I am able to do things and infact this week have been in Florida with friends.

 

2trusting

 

That’s great 2t, what improvements have you noticed?

 

I seem to be down to a few symptoms now and when I get waves they are not really devastating, the few symptoms remaining are Tinnitus that is 24/7 but seems to be getting a little better, Morning anxiety that can remain through the day, this is up and down although always present during the morning, and my sleep is still only about 5 or 6 hrs per night with a few no sleep nights thrown in, mood wise I still get the "this will never end" thoughts and a bit of down in the dumps feelings some times. In fact I seem to be in a minor wave today with some extra anxiety and depressed mood..

A normal person might find this list pretty daunting but I am sure every one reading understands just how small it is compared to when I was tapering.

 

2trusting

[[Ca...]]

I'm still taking benzos but I want to be part of this thread...it is great. I was just making myself jot down "what's better" as I go through my (currently rough) taper. My mind is much clearer, I do much better at work, I have fewer days when I crash completely, some symptoms are much better (even though others pop up) and I am getting better at just sitting with the agony, and letting go of expectations that it will end anytime soon. So thank you for letting me crash your thread. I need to taper real slow so I will not be taking "No Benzos" for a long time.

[[Ca...]]

Callydex - good luck!!! I have a similar history so stay in touch. This is indeed a cool thread. Congrats T1D!! 7 mile ride!!

[[...]]

My window lasted 3 days. It was amazing. When I was tired, it felt normal, not this total body systemic exhaustion tired. Again, I could joke, think, be funny etc...

 

Thrown back into the shit again now but that window definitely gave me some hope.

 

...just wanted to kick up this thread. How we all doing?

[[Ca...]]

I baked two days ago - haven't baked since May and I used to bake  at least once a week. Still feel like shit most of the time though...but baking is def progress for me considering I NEVER wanted to step foot in a kitchen again.

[[2t...]]

I have been good for a few weeks now with just anxiety and tinnitus to contend with, made the stupid mistake of thinking I was finally getting through this only to wake up yesterday after a bad nights sleep to some numbness and tingling in my hands and feet with louder tinnitus and worse anxiety, slept badly last night and have the same today along with bad mood and a little bit of the doom and glooms.

I am hoping this id just a short shallow wave and I will return to my healing soon.

On the good side all of the symptoms are a real PITA but not stopping me from doing things, just dampening my spirit a bit.

 

2trusting

[[dr...]]

I'm at almost 18 months and just feeling the passion for healing and life nowadays.

 

Benzo syndrome is an unnatural human event. I don't believe it can sustain itself past organic processes of the body given time.