Updosing Support Group

[Guest [Fu...]]

Thanks, Cantfly.

 

Yeah I mean she also said that it is by no means a guarantee that I will come close to "stabilizing" so I am extremely hesitant to updose and potentially throw out a year's worth of work tapering but if I can make things bearable while doing things correctly this time so I don't get slammed I feel like I have to take that chance, y'know? If I end up at 2.5 mg's and still feeling as awful as I have been recently I'll be devastated but I just feel like it's something that I need to at least try. Life was tolerable when I could do things like watch TV and do light yoga instead of a living nightmare like it is when my legs feel like toothpicks and the room is constantly spinning.

[[Ca...]]

Thanks Hopefree, But im only passing on what has lovingly been provided to me by so many people...

 

FuzzyD, I can only imagine most of it, Im in a similar physical situation, but it stops there for me...

So i do get it that things have to change... -I have a plan, which suits me for now...

And you are working on your own plan, which shows you are far from beat...

 

Updosing to little, no, or negative effect is a risk... How much risk you would apportion to each, i have no idea...

For me, i had a good idea from my past history and reading blogs, logs and support group threads... -lurking...

 

I think my original hesitation was only that some changes can be hard to undo if they dont work, for some people... where as, the risks from a hold are much less... maybe some tollerance after a rather long hold.. not sure how being in tollerance prior to tapering would affect this... Its a word that is often not used quite correctly, like kindeling or protracted etc.. -so it throws the data out a bit...

 

Dont be afraid to updose because its not "popular", but dont do it out of desperation alone..

 

But im sure once you gather the info that suits and fits your situation, you will be well on the way to making a solid decision...

And in that process, making this taper your own, i wish you every success...

 

 

[[no...]]

Hi everyone  Just saying hello as I'm not up to typing much but will post again when I feel up to it and if anyone interested I started a progress log on this link here  Nova's up-dosing progress log http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=175402.0#new

 

And its taken a lot out of me typing that up plus I've done a bit too much indoors, so time to rest the brain and body now  I will post more on this support thread when I'm up to it 

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[Ca...]]

Get well soon Nova... we miss you, but not enough to force you to reply...!

Thanks for popping in, Rest up...

 

[[Th...]]

Thank You Nova, very bright idea as the main forums do have a more negative spin on it, but sometimes it's just needs to be done! The anxiety added to the anxiety worrying does not help anyone as when we choose to make that updose we have pretty much already have made up our minds.

 

You can see in my signature I had to up dose last year by .5mg Klonopin. I starting drinking hard and was spinning my wheels. It helped 

 

Can we discuss rescue doses as well? I take them here and there and feel really guilty about it. My last cut was small and I don't know why but I started getting sxe on day 3 when it usually takes me till day 10. I guess it's because i'm going lower. I took a full day rescue dose this morning which wipes out any stupid K that left my body in the past 5 days. I feel really guilty but just felt so sick and this has gone on so long and I just need a break once in awhile. I rarely have windows and just felt really weak in body and mind.

 

I know beating myself up is not helping but I feel like so much guilt and so weak. Sorry to vent  :'(

[[Ca...]]

Third, Yes lets... after all it is up, not down and can have the same "stigma" attached...

 

I wouldnt know a window if it hit me on my head... I have basically been the same GI sick for 6 yrs... so if i need to function at a higher level for a day, like Drs or whatever, its my only choice (well i have found another med that works, but splitting hairs)...

 

I dont do it lightly and on occasion i have just had enough of sx and rescue for the greater good...

 

I guess i do feel guilty, but i can logic past that, so I am ok with it, and thats what matters to me.... yet im sure it wouldnt be met with big cheers on the general boards, and im not even sure its something i would promote (if thats the right word) except on a thread like this...

But there sure is a need for it in some situations, and its a very personal choice that should have information available to those in need, or even just curious...

 

Free - A great observation on your behalf...

 

And hope you are feeling a bit better...

 

[Guest [Fu...]]

I took a rescue dose of 10 mg's Valium last night too just because I'm so stressed out and terrified that I couldn't take it and now today I am really beating myself up and feeling miserable too.

[[Th...]]

Third, Yes lets... after all it is up, not down and can have the same "stigma" attached...

 

I wouldnt know a window if it hit me on my head... I have basically been the same GI sick for 6 yrs... so if i need to function at a higher level for a day, like Drs or whatever, its my only choice (well i have found another med that works, but splitting hairs)...

 

I dont do it lightly and on occasion i have just had enough of sx and rescue for the greater good...

 

I guess i do feel guilty, but i can logic past that, so I am ok with it, and thats what matters to me.... yet im sure it wouldnt be met with big cheers on the general boards, and im not even sure its something i would promote (if thats the right word) except on a thread like this...

But there sure is a need for it in some situations, and its a very personal choice that should have information available to those in need, or even just curious...

 

Free - A great observation on your behalf...

 

And hope you are feeling a bit better...

 

I'm beat today but read your post and thank you, it gave me a lot of comfort tonight. You guys are the best! Hope to post more tomorrow...just thank you 

[[Th...]]

I took a rescue dose of 10 mg's Valium last night too just because I'm so stressed out and terrified that I couldn't take it and now today I am really beating myself up and feeling miserable too.

 

I'm with you! The guilt! Just hearing I'm not alone is so comforting, at the same time I hate you are in pain. Dude I'm just so thankful for you guys.. I'm very emotional today so excuse my emotions that are out of control .

[[Ca...]]

I took a rescue dose of 10 mg's Valium last night too just because I'm so stressed out and terrified that I couldn't take it and now today I am really beating myself up and feeling miserable too.

Hey there FuzzyD...

-i think some people have a much clearer road to their end destination than others, not necissarily easier, but different... we all have to do whatever it takes, and i think its the motive behind a rescue dose or updose that is important, and thats something thats about as personal as it can get for each individual...

Try for a little dismay (more for the whole situation) rather than guilt, which is more personal and unfounded... -if that makes sense...

-or you could do joy that you took a positive step to ensuring your ultimate success...!

 

Stay strong...

 

[Guest [Fu...]]

No worries at all, I wish I wasn't so emotionally blunted. Sometimes I'll feel regular emotions and be like "OH MY GOD THAT'S WHAT HAPPINESS FEELS LIKE!". It's insane. These drugs are AWFUL and I can't believe they're still prescribed for long term use.

[[Ca...]]

Yeah, Im trying to get my head around the emo blunted thing...

Im blunted to pleasure in the real world, yet quite happy (i think) in my created bubble...

Its mixed up for sure..

 

Think things are changing here in Australia... new benzo scripts are rather frowned upon... it seems the Drs and pharmacists have been given notice... Though it may just transfer to other meds... rinse, repeat...

 

[Guest [Fu...]]

On the one hand I hope that happens in the U.S. soon to spare countless others from going through the hell that we've gone through but on the other it worries me because they are so inept that if legislation was ever passed they'd almost certainly cut all the people already on the drug off creating so many horrible situations.

 

It blows my mind that this drug has been out for DECADES and there isn't at least a law about how doctors have to warn patients about the dangers of longterm use/addiction/seizures/etc. But then again this is the same country where they handed out opiates like Skittles until white suburban voters started losing children. Big pharma and the control they have over the politicians here through lobbyists is too insidious for words.

 

Sorry I'm in a really terrible mood tonight.

[[Ca...]]

But your right...

Though Australia is small enough for the social costs of a mass c/t to have to be considered. Possibly the saving grace...

Hey, cranky mood IS emotion... there is that...!! Dare i say well done... lol

Take care Fuzzy...

 

[[ho...]]

In the SEVENTIES there was the largest class action lawsuit in UKs history against benzos. It came to no verdict and was swept under the rug. They've known about this since this poison was invented. And of course the US is gonna keep it top secret. And benzos are one of the top most prescribed drugs in the country. Yea you see all these addiction help commercials, all for cocaine and heroin. NEVER have I seen one for help with benzos. Yea once opiate addiction has run rampant through this country they started to come out with drugs to help. But none for "mothers little helper".

[Guest [Fu...]]

That's why it blows my mind that there doesn't seem to be any public awareness about this outside of benzo communities like this one. How can that be possible?

[[ho...]]

Money

[[Ca...]]

Money, but not just making it from sales, there is economic productivity, and also savings -like hospital and medical throughput numbers...

And ofcorse, keeping mum happy at home, bringin up the next generation of economic earners...

It gets rather multi faceted, and im sure many Drs thought they were doing the least evil when prescribing... But i think those days have run their course now...

-just my quick thoughts...

 

 

[[no...]]

Hi everyone  I've posted an update on my P/log here http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=175402.msg2335921#new

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[be...]]

[glow=red,2,300]"Sista"[/glow] thinking of you. Stay Strong , telling one of the strongest people I know. :smitten:

[[no...]]

[glow=red,2,300]"Sista"[/glow] thinking of you. Stay Strong , telling one of the strongest people I know. :smitten:

  :smitten: :smitten:

[[Ca...]]

Hey Nova, thanks for sharing your log, sounds a rough journey and a struggle to the last...

Wishing you much strength, and know you will be back n fighting alongside us as soon as you are ready...

Best wishes...

 

[Guest [Fu...]]

I'm on day 3 of updosing to 3.0 and I have no idea if I should continue or go back down to 2.5. The indecision is killing me.

[[jr...]]

I'm on day 3 of updosing to 3.0 and I have no idea if I should continue or go back down to 2.5. The indecision is killing me.

 

Whenever you are undecided as to what to do, that is a good time to not do anything and wait awhile

[Guest [Fu...]]

I know but if I were to go down I have to do it now.