The Klonopin Klub#2

[[Tr...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

 

[[Be...]]

TRY,

 

Good Morning TRY, CD, Maya, Bennie, Nomo, Gilster, Burned, OneDay, WR, Bstrong, Mymana ~ and all other KK's,

 

I'm going back to work today and can feel the anticipation intensifying the DR/DP.  My biggest fear is getting up in front of 35 students and freezing.  I freeze just standing in front of my closet trying to figure out what to wear.  I know -- big problem right?  All these negative thoughts is exhausting.  My tolerance for "people" is minimal.  Send me some "brain light".

 

I have a question about tapering.  Currently I'm at .045 grams - I don't know what that means in mg.  I think it's almost 1/4 tablet.  How doable is it to plan on jumping mid December?  I'm hoping the new and improved symptom of extreme fatigue leaves soon. 

 

Hoping for a symptom free day for all......

 

If you are cutting 10% off the current dose every 14 days, then after 8 more cuts you will be at about .019 grams (about .057 mg). This would be mid-December. For a cut and hold taper, this would seem a reasonable jumping point. It's possible but not in any way a given, you'd feel acute type symptoms associated with already being off, so you'll more than ready to get this over with. For comparison to Microtaper jumping, being at .019 g would be 19 more .001 g cuts to zero.

 

I MTed to nearly zero and jumped last year on December 12. The holidays were tolerable in terms of symptoms, surprisingly. The bumpier ride was actually before.

 

Jump when you can wrap your head around it and feel that your home environment and activities are not in full swing, that's my opinion. Good luck with this!

 

Bennie

Good Morning ( all ) @ Bennie what mg pill is Coyote cutting from and I must be wonked  today as I think I wrote Her a  messed up response ? Was outside a bit today working a bit and came in wrote out some bills so pretty much shot ! Pftt! Hope everyone is doing there best ! ~CD

 

CD, Would love it if you wrote out my bills while you're at it...

 

In calculating, I just kept making 10% reductions in grams every two weeks from the current dose, which is .045 grams. I assumed she is using a .50 mg pill. 

 

IMHO, percentages aren't really necessary at these lower doses.  This dose is around when I (and Mana) switched to a set gram reduction (for me, .006 Gs every 7 days).  This may be something you'd like to Try, Coyote, if sticking with C/H.

 

Love and hugs,

WR

 

Agree, that percentages have very little usefulness at very low doses. Because technically, one could taper into infinity. Smaller cuts create significant momentum at the end.

[[Be...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

TRY, Do you usually hold 11 days? Are you still using compounded liquid? Kind of tricky to be at this low of a dose. As mentioned for Coyote, the cut and hold percentages could get dragged out at low doses. You might want to determine a set number of cuts to the end—not based on percentages. If there is ever a time to blow past the recommended percentages, its now.

[Guest [Gi...]]

Hi everyone,

Today is much better with me. I have been cutting .001 everyday with no holds since March and so far it has been working alright. I plan on continuing at this pace for as long as I can. I hope that everyone has had a decent day. We have a hurricane watch here in Florida. So very nice. Hopefully , it doesn't turn into a hurricane. Expected to get  a lot of rain on the  west gulf coast. Cd, I agree with you. Bennie, You can send some signed checks to me as well : )

Warmly,

Gilster

[[Tr...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

TRY, Do you usually hold 11 days? Are you still using compounded liquid? Kind of tricky to be at this low of a dose. As mentioned for Coyote, the cut and hold percentages could get dragged out at low doses. You might want to determine a set number of cuts to the end—not based on percentages. If there is ever a time to blow past the recommended percentages, its now.

 

Bennie, You know me well.  Yes, 11 day holds.  I know I'm in acute, no relief.  This is not how I had it planned in my mind.

 

TRY

[[Co...]]

Thank you for your support CD, WR, TRY, Bennie.  Everything went well.  I take myself so seriously.    I'm now just starting to feel some calm.

 

And thanks for the math stuff.  You guys who use a scale know getting the exact number is nerve wracking and I don't have the patience for that.  So, if I'm at .045, I usually start going down by

.001 g every other day so that by the end of two weeks, I've probably already tapered 5%.  Does that make sense?  I'm trying to plan jumping during winter break which begins Mid December.  And gives me at least 5 weeks to test how I'll feel.  I have no idea what to expect.  Not that I'm chomping at the bit to get off this crap. 

 

Coyote , good job !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Thanks CD.  Have a good night.

[[Co...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

Thanks TRY,

I don't understand this math stuff, so I don't know how the amount you're on translates.  Is it considered low enough to jump?  Is it possible to hold too long?  I'm sure this has been discussed, but I don't remember. 

 

Hang on...

[[Tr...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

Thanks TRY,

I don't understand this math stuff, so I don't know how the amount you're on translates.  Is it considered low enough to jump?  Is it possible to hold too long?  I'm sure this has been discussed, but I don't remember. 

 

Hang on...

 

Coyote, not really sure what the safest option is, but my longer holds are not helping. 

 

Hope you have a good night.  You should be very proud of your accomplishment today.

 

TRY

[[Be...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

I don't understand this math stuff, so I don't know how the amount you're on translates.  Is it considered low enough to jump?  Is it possible to hold too long?  I'm sure this has been discussed, but I don't remember. 

 

Hang on...

 

Coyote, not really sure what the safest option is, but my longer holds are not helping. 

 

Hope you have a good night.  You should be very proud of your accomplishment today.

 

TRY

 

TRY,

I am trying to determine what might be the best way for you to complete your taper. If you are using compounded liquid, then you can't logistically switch to MT, even if micro cuts would help. The daily or semi-daily cuts give your body a graduated transition down. The body/brain benefits from having a sense of moving off versus the inertia of holding, IMO. Look at my sig from date 10/3 and thereafter. They are benchmark dates with lots of little cuts in-between not written out. Notice how the last two months the percentage rate was about 50%. I think you can space out remaining cuts that can be compounded so you can be off in the next 60 or so days. The percentage will be far higher than past taper rate; it has to increase otherwise you'll be tapering into infinity.

 

If you can wrap your mind around this, or if anyone else can, please jump in.

 

I have to leave for an appointment and I feel like crap. Major anxiety. My cycle came today. I'm shaking.

 

Bennie

[[Bu...]]

Morning all,

 

Try:  you and I are in the same boat for sure right now.  I'm positive I'm in the acute and feeling it.  I like what Bennie said about a microtaper possibly for you.  I'm thinking one or two more reductions and I'll be done.  Just not much clonazepam left now.  Hang in there!

 

Bennie:  sorry you feel like crap-wonder if your cycle is skewing your hormones and causing anxiety?  Hope it calms down soon.

 

Gilster:  hope the storm doesn't turn into a hurricane either.  Have you heard from Deep at all lately?  I think about her a lot and wonder how she is.  Stay safe

 

Coyote:  you will do this-that is a good taper plan

 

Hi CD and WR:  hope you are having decent days today

 

I'm a wreck-still waiting on test result to see if I have immunity to tetanus or not.  Would like to avoid a tetanus shot while treading water in the swamp right now    Have enough to deal with as you can understand all too well.

 

Hope everyone has an ok day today and even some windows 

[[Tr...]]

Dose is just not workng at all.  Afraid of going cold turkey.  I've held for 11 days at .08 mgs.  Feeling worse. 

 

Coyote,glad things went well, I'm not surprised!

 

Hang in there KK family!

 

TRY

 

I don't understand this math stuff, so I don't know how the amount you're on translates.  Is it considered low enough to jump?  Is it possible to hold too long?  I'm sure this has been discussed, but I don't remember. 

 

Hang on...

 

Coyote, not really sure what the safest option is, but my longer holds are not helping. 

 

Hope you have a good night.  You should be very proud of your accomplishment today.

 

TRY

 

TRY,

I am trying to determine what might be the best way for you to complete your taper. If you are using compounded liquid, then you can't logistically switch to MT, even if micro cuts would help. The daily or semi-daily cuts give your body a graduated transition down. The body/brain benefits from having a sense of moving off versus the inertia of holding, IMO. Look at my sig from date 10/3 and thereafter. They are benchmark dates with lots of little cuts in-between not written out. Notice how the last two months the percentage rate was about 50%. I think you can space out remaining cuts that can be compounded so you can be off in the next 60 or so days. The percentage will be far higher than past taper rate; it has to increase otherwise you'll be tapering into infinity.

 

If you can wrap your mind around this, or if anyone else can, please jump in.

 

I have to leave for an appointment and I feel like crap. Major anxiety. My cycle came today. I'm shaking.

 

Bennie

 

Bennie,

 

I will look into your suggestions.  I took my dose last night, and felt worse.  This morning full on wd.  I think I'm paradoxial, or the dose isn't doing anything. 

 

I hope you feel better.  Thanks for taking the time to reply.

 

TRY

[[Tr...]]

Morning all,

 

Try:  you and I are in the same boat for sure right now.  I'm positive I'm in the acute and feeling it.  I like what Bennie said about a microtaper possibly for you.  I'm thinking one or two more reductions and I'll be done.  Just not much clonazepam left now.  Hang in there!

 

Bennie:  sorry you feel like crap-wonder if your cycle is skewing your hormones and causing anxiety?  Hope it calms down soon.

 

Gilster:  hope the storm doesn't turn into a hurricane either.  Have you heard from Deep at all lately?  I think about her a lot and wonder how she is.  Stay safe

 

Coyote:  you will do this-that is a good taper plan

 

Hi CD and WR:  hope you are having decent days today

 

I'm a wreck-still waiting on test result to see if I have immunity to tetanus or not.  Would like to avoid a tetanus shot while treading water in the swamp right now    Have enough to deal with as you can understand all too well.

 

Hope everyone has an ok day today and even some windows 

 

Burned,

 

My dose has bottomed out.  Not doing anything just making it worse.   

 

Hang in there.

 

TRY

[[Bu...]]

Try:  sending lots of hugs 

[[Be...]]

Try,

 

The only purpose of continue to take your dose it to make a smoother transition to not taking it at all. That is, if the body senses the reduction. That's the only benefit. Longer holds may work at higher doses, but at low doses, momentum is key. I think when we feel better in a window it's because our body has hit on the sweet spot of making the adjustment to living with less Benzo. There are few if any sweet spots at this dose. So coming off K will be a good thing. You will get this done.

 

I'm in a menstrual wave. Feels no I different than withdrawal when progesterone bottoms out. Curled up in bed now.

 

Bennie

[[Di...]]

I just took my last dose of clonazepam tonight. 

 

Benzo free!

[[Ma...]]

Disney Girl

CONGRATS on being klonopin free!  :smitten:

 

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f340/maya6842/BB/image_26.jpeg

[[Ma...]]

Hello to everyone. I have been having a little more stomach stuff still, but overall doing better than yesterday and this weekend. There are over 30 people interested in Ezra's (MM consultant) free online class on cannabinoids for people harmed by benzos. We are just figuring out the where and when. If anyone else is interested please let me know. It is exciting that so many are almost done. I have another Baylissa quote. She is so amazing.

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f340/maya6842/Mobile%20Uploads/image_106.jpeg

 

Lots of love and light to all

XXO Maya

 

 

[[NY...]]

Congratulations on your freedom Disney Girl.  WOOHOO! 

 

http://bestanimations.com/Holidays/Fireworks/fireworks-animation-46.gif

[[my...]]

Wow...Disney Girl! You have shown us what strength and perseverance look like...good job!!  Enjoy your freedom 

(And a BIG congratulations to you. )

[[ca...]]

Disney Girl ~CD

[Guest [Gi...]]

Congrats Disney Girl!!!!!! I'm so happy for you.

Burned- I haven't heard from Deep in a long time. I don't think that she intends to taper anytime soon if at all. I saw a post from her on FB that it was the second anniversary of her mother's death. She is wearing a 30 day heart monitor and is still in a wheelchair to get out of the house. I think that she had gained a few pounds so I don't know about her diet. Her area received about 9 inches of rain yesterday. I'm sure that her anxiety is high as she lives 10 minutes from the Gulf of Mexico.

I hope that everyone is doing alright. I wish you a good Thursday.

As far as for me, my anxiety is higher today with the storm approaching. Local counties have closed schools and there is much flooding about 50 miles from my house. I have many huge oak trees on my property so I'm praying for the branches to stay on the trees and not break off. I am finding myself uneasy about staying at home so I try to get out everyday including today I will go to my son's house. .My husband will be working. I am uncomfortable being alone in my house for long periods of time. I have to keep my hands and mind busy. Please pray for me to get through this storm alright.

Sincerely, Gilster

[[Be...]]

Congratulations to Disney Girl!!

   

[[Be...]]

Good morning everyone!

 

Nomo, I read your inspirational blog and watched the video you linked to. Are you doing DDP Yoga? I admire you getting out there every day to walk!

 

Gilster, I am thinking of you, hoping your trees stay right where they are! I understand about needing to be around people. There was a time I could not be left alone without feeling terribly insecure. The need for physical closeness with my husband in bed turned spooning into an act of suffocation. All these habits that arise during withdrawal, are not the new norm, but a phase... Thank you for sharing about Deep. Sad to hear she is in a wheelchair. I pray she gets stronger and is able to be independent again.

 

Burnedout, TRY—sending you both lots of hugs, to continue your tapers, move through fear, and jump in the near future.

 

Maya, I am interested in the group class with Ezra. Let me know by PM what is necessary to participate, technology wise and all... Sorry about your tummy. I learned an interesting thing about nausea recently that may seem obvious, but didn't become evident until I was doing some brain retraining in my PDTR neuromuscular therapy session: that excessive brain challenges can cause the nausea and tiredness. This is happening all the time in withdrawal, as we work nonstop during tapering to function more and more without the Benzo. My stomach feels pretty normal these days. Occasional nauseousness that I do not take as a sign of dysfunction, random D from who knows what, and the myriad ways that having a menstrual cycle makes me feel sick. I trust that you and your tummy will settle even more after you are off V. You sound so strong and I am encouraged by how your life is unfolding.

 

Bstrong, wherever you are at in tapering, I am plugging for you!

 

Coyote, My Mana, CD, WR, ((everyone))—wishing you peace and good things!

 

I am getting through this cycle with less angst than last month. Though the drop in progesterone is physically very much like sudden acute Benzo withdrawal with inner vibration and exhaustion. I am already feeling better after more sleep. There are things I want to be doing outside but I won't push. Gladly, I am not having hip, groin or leg pain with any regularity in the past week. I have good mobility, improved range of motion, much better posture, and although home life is challenging, I am happier with myself.

 

Living in hope today,

Bennie

 

 

[[Bu...]]

What a huge accomplishment Disney Girl!  CONGRATULATIONS! 

 

Gilster:  so sorry to hear about Deep-hope she can regain her health little by little-thinking of her always.  You will be in my thoughts today and hope the storm isn't too bad.  It's good that you will go to your son's house.  Stay safe!

 

Bennie:  thank-you-I'm in the swamp so hope to jump soon.  Thanks for the brain challenge/nausea info/problems  during benzo withdrawal-makes a lot of sense-our guts and brain are so connected.  Glad you are doing better 

 

Hope everyone has an ok day-hang in there 

[[...]]

HAPPY SEPTEMBER 1st, BUDDIES!!!  August is OVER!!!  YAY!!!

 

YAY DISNEY GIRL!!!  YOU DID IT!!!

 

I saw my first furry caterpillar of the year today.  He was hot out there in the 90 degree heat, but he was happy, and all of us caterpillars have reason to be happy and hopeful, too.  No matter how we happen to feel today, our brains and bodies are being transformed and healing from the inside out.  The little caterpillar moved slowly, but he was moving along consistently and persistently.  When  I tried to take a picture with my phone, it was surprising how far he'd moved in the moments it took me to focus and click.  We are moving faster than we think.  Freedom is coming.  Who would ever think a glorified, fuzzy, worm would become a butterfly just by resting?  Hmmm. 

 

Hi Bennie!  Glad you are getting through the crimson tide with less pain than last time!  I also love that video I posted on my blog yesterday!  No, I don't do DDP yoga.  I do regular old yoga.  It kinda looks like he is teaching all the regular poses, though.  I think the loud wrestler-guy just adds a little of his own personality to it, from what I can tell. 

 

I started going to yoga every day last December when my hip and feet were throbbing and I felt like I was 90 years old.  I don't know how I found this video.  I may have googled, "How to not give up."  I have googled a lot of things since this taper started.  Watching Arthur's youtube story over and over encouraged me that I could heal.  In an interview I tracked down, his only advice was to "keep going, and don't quit."  So that 's  what I did; with yoga, walking, and this hellacious taper.  Here is a longer video which shows how he kept at it.  He also says that "A man with an MD behind his name told me I would never walk again.  The biggest mistake I ever made was accepting that.  I let somebody else tell me what I could and couldn't do..."  I took that to heart, too. 

 

 

I am by no means a pro wrestler kinda person.  I just was inspired by a guy who kept getting up every time he fell down.  That is really all we can do.  It is EVERYTHING.

 

Love and HOPE to you and all my buddies!!! :smitten: