Canadian Eh? Pre and post withdrawal support

[[We...]]

hi fellow Cannucks!

 

anyone out there from the east coast? You don't need to broadcast the location, just curious.

 

this forum is my lifeline right now

 

xx Wecan16

[[ba...]]

Hey, WeCanDoThis16, welcome to Canuckville  . We have had at least two other folks from the Maritimes post so far-SerenityNow and allbymyself, on pages 8 and 9. One of the two said they're in Halifax.

 

So far this support thread hasn't had all that much specific 'benzo chat,' but it's still nice just to have a north of the 49th parallel thread for us toque types, and any other people who are Canuck-curious  !

 

I noticed on your sig that you're tapering off Ativan; congrats on your progress  . You may have hit a speedbump or two (who doesn't, huh?), but you'll beat the beast, grr.

 

Kiddo1977 (who started this group) is also tapering off A. I messed up an A taper, so did the c/o to Valium. I c/o'd being passed by many snails on the way , and have begun my taper the same way. As long as we can keep going in the right "Bleah to benzos!!" direction, I figure it's all good-if not easy.

 

Please feel free to stop by anytime for general/specific chit chat, or just to say "hi"  . The more we post, the more we all hopefully benefit somehow, eh?!

 

[[od...]]

Checking in from Sask. (hey maritimer's!) to say hey. The amount of Ativan I was on was pretty minor, for not too long, but taking it slow so about 1/2 way off by now. Not too bad, except for some brain zap stuff, and feeling a bit weird.

Competivitive fastball is my big summer thing, but I'm on the bench injured slightly right now and it drives me crazy not to be playing and burning off energy and anxiety. Should be back on field soon I hope!!!!

I'm looking forward to some beach time up at P.A. Nat'l Park, and camping.

Hoping it rains enough for the crops, but not too much, and that the mosquitos are smaller than fighter planes this year. I may not post much, but like to check in here to see what Canucks may be up to. Hang in there everyone, EH.

[[We...]]

Thanks guys and gals for the welcome!

 

 

I have a benzo question in case anyone knows--

 

 

I'm committed to doing the microtaper process. SO, whether I have to dissolve the pills in alcohol myself or I happen to secure some liquid benzos, I'm planning on doing it.

 

Problem is, I am super anxious about the dissolving of pills, like I'm going to constantly wonder if I've messed up the measuring, the amounts etc (because of benzo brain) so, I'd really love just to be able to get the pure liquid concentrate Ativan/lorazepam, so I can just use that to dilute in water.

 

I'm not talking about compounded stuff, I just mean the pure oral concentrate Ativan/benzo from the drug company. I know they have them in the US, but I'm calling around everywhere and can't seem to find a pharmacy that can get them in Canada.

 

I was wondering if any other Canadians out there were able to secure the oral concentrate liquid benzos/Ativan in order to do their tapers.

 

any help would be sooo appreciated.

 

thanks again, and Good luck to you all

 

Wcan16

[[Ca...]]

Another 'reply to myself'...starting to feel like a megalomaniac  ?! Anyhow, just wanted to say 'Hi' to Kiddo/Orion/D. Advisor ET AL.; hope you are all doing okay. Any other Canucks out there who aren't into total hibernation, silent lurking, or just need an invitation to post?? Again, not my thread-hardly!-but I'm stubborn.

 

Surely there are others up here who may find the idea of strength in numbers appealing, or want to just check in, even if you're not into/up to posting a whole lot of info? Someone say SOMEthing, before winter finally peters out, and we all get too busy making up for our loss of vitamin D !

 

Calgarian

 

I rarely go past the blog section so just found this. I am posting but I had only read through the first few posts.

Chinookwind is also from Alberta. She lives not far from me.

 

Carol

[[ba...]]

Hi Carol (geddeca)-thanks for stopping by  ! Glad you found our little group, hanging out here down in the 'support' category. That's kind of cool you know 'Chinookwind'; hopefully she will drop in again sometime (hint, hint ). As the [apparently!] Welcome Wagon type here-by default  -I also hope you'll feel free to check in, and post when you feel like it. We Canuckians gotta stick together!!

 

p.s. congrats on being benzo etc. free  !

[[ba...]]

Wcan16, I hope someone with some experience with compounded Ativan may be able to answer your questions. I tried to titrate off Ativan before my c/o to Valium, and had a bad time-but I made a lot of basic mistakes (with what I know now...).

 

I was always a bit anxious about the 'mixing' of the drug and water, also. As I taper Valium, I'm considering switching to a micro taper/compound at some point, so I totally get your concerns. If you don't find some advice here, maybe another spot on BB have input of some kind.

 

Although it would be nice if a Canuck has some Canuckcentric info-please share if you do  ! That's what we're here for, after all, eh?

[[We...]]

Thanks, bablatrice.

 

I've considered switching to valium but I'm scared..lol...I think I'll try to ride it out on Ativan and just dissolve them in alcohol. that makes me scared too, but less scared.

 

Good luck with the rest of your taper!!!

 

Hugs,

shannon

[[ba...]]

I totally understand you wanting to taper from the Ativan, WeCan16; it's taking me much(!!) longer via the c/o to valium, and like many others I've found the v to be not such a 'happy' drug. From the sounds of people on the Ativan straight taper, it's certainly doable. Nothing about benzos seems to be easy, but if a person is determined, it sounds like most folks make it [off] eventually  .

 

And I think just about everyone on BB feels apprehensive/scared etc. about many steps in the process; what's not to be a be freaked out about  ! That's why we're all here, trying to figure out what exactly will work for each of us. As long as we hang in and keep at it-best of luck to us all on our often winding paths out of benzoland  . Thanks for the taper encouragement!

[[We...]]

Thanks for the welcome and support.

 

Oh how we wish we'd never tried these  nasty benzos when our docs first mentioned them. hehe.

 

but we don't have a rewind button. at least we have eachother here on BB to make this process tolerable. what a god-send this community is.

 

hang in there, we will make it through!!!

 

Shannon

[[Ca...]]

June 12th. And we had to turn the furnace on!  Just a few days ago we broke a heat record and it was 34 Celsius.

Crazy Calgary.

 

[[al...]]

Haven't visited for a while-busy horse time -but great to see a lot of new posts and a few new peeps, hurray  ! Would like to yak a bit to catch up, but have a hot date with Mr. Insomnia...hope not, that is. I hope everyone is plugging along, and getting some support from wherever they can, especially here on BB (hippo[horse]therapy is one of my best sources...they're so demanding it makes you forget all this benzo crapola, at least for a while  ).

 

Hang tough, Canucks...we'll all get there eventually-i.e. benzo free-if we keep our eye on the 'prize.'

 

p.s. Carol...used to live in Red Deer, and hang out some in Calgary; that weather is most def some crazy ! I remember going from 20ish degrees and spring flowers to a HUGE blizzard with FEET of snow right at the end of April one year-ugh!! (At least it melted fast, without flooding.) Hope you stop the yo-yo stuff soon...at least it's better than the forest fires in Saskatchewan, yikes.

[[ba...]]

"Where have all the Canucks gone, where have all the Canucks gone, long time ago??" (I think that's a venerable folk song, actually based on some pro-peace politics, but I learned it at summer camp in more recent-though not THAT recent  -times.) Anyhow, I guess it came to mind a) because we're on the cusp of the summer solstice this weekend, and b) where the heck are y'all??!! Not at the cottage already-at least not full time, that is if you're lucky enough to have access to one!

 

Surely some people are still on their computers, somewhere? We had some decent activity on here a short while ago, but we can't ALL be so busy applying insect repellent and sun screen or seeking shade that no one has time to stop by and post at least a few words...OMG, I think I'm turning into the Canuck support thread nag, argh!! Not that I haven't already been certified as the thread cheerleader (without the cartwheels and pompoms  ), but please don't make me become Babblatrice-the-B****!!

 

It's hard enough being somewhat less than Ms. Congeniality in real life, especially benzo-wise  . Having completed my c/o to valium, and started my taper (that's about all the detail I want to get into for now), I've found my mood positively poisonous lately-especially in the mornings. The old 'eating soup with a fork'/slogging through cee-ment' syndrome. UGH. Plus I have a sports injury (okay, I had a horse  who was super polite, and let ME go over a jump first; I had the bad fortune to land on a very hard bunch of rails/solid wood) from a while back.

 

So, I'm a psychological/emotional/chemical/physical WHATever mess, totally incapable of doing backflips and leading cheers. There's got to be someone lurking around here who is not quite as pathetic as me, seriously!! It's kind of ironic that I've never felt a craving for a benzo, but I lust after ibuprofen; yes, I confess I would take them like candy if I could  . Benzo sxs can be sooo awful, I'm wondering why this other injury thing has to pick on me now, too.

 

(BTW I've been to physio-as much as I can afford for now-and my veterinarian sis in law has lent me a TENS machine she's been experimenting on large animals with. I'm also rocking the heat/cold thing, and stretching, but if anyone has any other suggestions besides reincarnating myself as a horse-o-phobe please let me know!)

 

Better run, er, hobble...and let someone else post, who must have a more inspiring tale!!!!!! Anything's gotta be better than my tale of woe! ANYthing!!!!!!! 

[[We...]]

Hi Bablatrice,

 

I hear you about the ibuprofen. the inflammation and pain that comes from these tapers are really intense--body pain, migraines, etc.

 

are you doing a daily microtaper or biweekly cut and holds like the ashton manual?

 

 

hang in there, buddy

 

shannon

[[...]]

Hey Canadian buddies.

 

Just popping my head in to say hi.  I'm in the golden horse-shoe area (Southern Ontario). 

 

I'm 5 months off slugging away.

 

zDrugs are bad mmmmkay.

[[We...]]

Hi G33k,

 

glad u are off the z drugs

 

shannon

[[ba...]]

Hey, yay  , nice to see some thread action, above  ! This presents me-the ranting & whinging cheerleader  -with an interesting conundrum:  I'd rather not post when some wunnerful  BB Canucks rock the thread so I can rest my benzo addled brain and my twinklefingered keyboard digits, BUT I really have to thank WCDT16 for chipping in twice(!). Plus gotta give a big Canuck welcome  to g33k-a fellow Golden Horseshoe S. Ont. type.

 

Thanks for your comments on the 'I luff ibuprofen [but don't wanna take too much]' re: inflammation/pain from taper sxs also, WCDT16! I know there's a pain support thread here, but it doesn't seem too get much traffic(?). I'm not glad to hear you can relate to the migraine etc. crapola, but misery loves company , so appreciate the empathy.

 

As for the specifics of my Valium taper, I guess right now I'm in the 'cut and hold' category, but aside from following the very basic outline of the Ashton protocol-as with my c/o-I'm pretty much going rogue, as in plunking along at my own pace, which is what you might call positively glacial. I've rushed too many things only to crash and burn, so I'm just trying to keep going in the right direction however fast er SLOW my body/brain tell me.

 

I started off at around 25 mg. V, which is moderately highish; once I-fingers crossed-get down around 15?ish-I'll likely look seriously at micro tapering. Trying to play it by ear, and not make any intense plans, since it seems like if I try to force the issue in any way everything goes KABOOM=gotta tiptoe along and try to play it cool . Well, as cool as a sxs-sweating benzoite can, anyway, gah!!

 

But enough about el Bab, bleah!! Thanks again  to those who posted in the past day, and those who drop in when they can; anything to stop this from becoming the 'Bab Thread,' eh?! Which reminds me, it's officially the summer solstice today, which means Canada Day is fast approaching-"Go, Canucks!" Has anyone else noticed how many more patriotic, maple leaf flag featuring products seem to be available each year?

 

Used to be, there was just the odd t-shirt or ball cap (along with actual flags, of course), but now about the only thing I haven't seen is flag-embossed 'tp,' and that's probably just 'cuz I haven't checked every single retail outlet  ! Maybe we could get a maple syrup buzz going re: what Canuck celebration stuff is out there, and what all we Sitting-ABOVE  -the-States toquesters are gonna be doing on the glorious FIRST??!! 

[[od...]]

Was planning on camping for Canada Day, but with the dry and droughty weather and forest fires around the prairies will have to see, bummer. I hate shopping, but girlfriend thinks $ stores selling lots of Canada Day stuff is one reason why theres so much gear around, when I asked her. My best memory of July 1ST is visiting relative in Ottawa when I was a kid, and going to the fire works on Parliament Hill, so many people and great fireworks. Fun giant party!

[[...]]

Canada Day is on a Wednesday this week.  I wanna know whos responsible for that blunder 

 

At least we'll get a break mid week for those of us working through our W/D

 

 

[[al...]]

Yeah, mid-week stat holidaze don't make for great long w'ends, unless you're lucky job-wise, bleah! ...So, no Canada Day Eh tales yet, huh? From the fireworks I was hearing earlier tonight some pyrotechnic fans are getting a head start  ! When I lived out west, I don't remember people setting off stuff at the drop of the hat, but here in Ont. I'm thinking it'd be a decent racket to be selling fireworks, hmmm.

 

I had a really nutty/frustrating July 1st a few years ago...horse related, of course  ! I was helping someone on the national team condition some endurance horses, and they decided to have about 5-6 critters go in a big traditional Canada Day parade in a lakeside town that gets ginormous in the summer.

 

Asked to show up at the farm to load up around 9, I [duh] assumed the parade was at maybe 11 a.m.-it turned out to be not until 1. But, it was a good thing we were early getting started, 'cuz when I arrived at the barn...2 horses had escaped from the pasture overnight, ARGH. I drove around the area  with the owner with a truck/trailer, and was on the phone to police etc. for an hour or 2.

 

Thank goodness, we finally drove past a farm, and saw the 2 miscreant equines tied to a couple of apple trees...went in and talked to the kind folks, and loaded up the escapees (one had a small cut on his leg, but they were fine otherwise). What really shocked me was the fact that the person I rode for, with whom I wasn't that well acquainted, didn't even thank the 'saviours.'

 

In fact, they even complained the horses had been tied to the trees with makeshift rope halters...well, geez, apple farmers don't generally have a lot of horse tack/equipment! The rope halters were safe, and had worked well; who complains about a HUGE favour, sheesh!! I was totally embarrassed to be associated with such a dork of a horse person...

 

Anyways, we eventually loaded up all the horses and drove to the 'vacation beach town'; it was crazy busy with tons of parade entries and thousands of people lining the route (I had had no idea it was such a big deal ). Riding Arabian horses can be a bit exciting under calmer circumstances, so riding in a parade was a bit tense, but things turned out fine...I was impressed that the youngish horse I rode was so good !

 

Oh yeah, BUT one gal who rode with us on her own horse decided to relax a LOT before the parade with a whole bunch of drinks...as a result, she wove all over the road, pausing to shriek "hello's" to her many acquaintances. So that was all quite, uh, entertaining  ! Good thing her horse was a real steady guy, yikes.

 

When we finally got back to the un-staging area for the parade, I realized I was going to be late for a family thing in the afternoon. The rude eejit I'd discovered the person I'd just ridden/trained with a few times (when they'd been quite [uncharacteristically!] charming) had ditched their rude side for a while, and offered to wait for someone whose truck/trailer person hadn't showed up for some reason.

 

Stuck in this maze of celebrations, I had to trek over to some distant houses and ask to use a phone...yeah, this was back when not many people had cell phones, drat!!!!  Eventually, we all trailered back to the farm, at which point the rude Arabian owner expected me to perform extensive first aid on the fairly minor cut the one horse had acquired while on the lam. HA!

 

I've had people ride my horses in competitions the odd time, and the deal is (as long as the rider is an asset, which you check out in advance!), you are even on favours i.e. rider has a horse, and owner has a rider...period. I always had food etc. for my rider, and thanked them, and made sure they had a good experience vs. asking them to do extra work (clean out trailer, do first aid on someone else's horse).

 

If it was an emergency, I'd have helped out no problem, but the owner was a lazy &*$#@ who just wanted a slave...when my ride showed up, I was outta there, and declined to assist in any further conditioning rides. I also was chastised by relatives etc. at the BBQ I was extremely late for, so all in all, just a nice stress-filled Canada Day.

 

From that day on, I've stayed away from parades, even as a spectator...just too much trauma as a deja vu kinda thing. And that's MY thrilling tale  ...

 

 

[[ba...]]

Whoa-lol  -that is one stressful sounding Canada Day  ! Glad we had at least a coupla/few 'patriotic day' tales. And now that it's officially July 1st, "Happy CD!" to us all! (My brother texted me to have a happy 'CD' and I momentarily wondered what CD in my music collection was supposed to be the happiest?? one, gah!)

 

Maybe, just maybe, if folks are hanging out here for a while today, some more BB'ers will at least post to say "hey!" from a few different parts of our fair country?? I dare ya  !! It'd be nice to hear from some interesting places, and people other than me-ya think  ?!

 

p.s. I've been meaning to say 'hi' to Allie, seeing as how we both seem to be horse-y types, although I think I'm more of a dabbler by comparison i.e. only one horse, and haven't lived on my own farm etc. But good to meet another Cdn! BB who knows "the outside of a horse is good for the inside of a [wo]man"! (Not my quote, forget who's supposed to have said it first!)

[[...]]

I'm cutting grass today.

 

Its slow going.  it's got to be 8 inches high in some spot given all the rain and the fact that I haven't been able to cut it as often as I'd like given my energy levels it turning into a real project.   

 

Plus my wife cut the grass earlier this year and clipped a stump with the blade and buggered that blade.  Got a new one, but it really really sucks.  Time to by another new one.

 

 

Edit:  I'd rather be throwing my time and effort into making my 'redneck solar pool heater' project.  Hopefully I have some energy to throw at that after grass cutting.

[[Na...]]

Happy Canada Day (148) to all! Hope everyone is doing ok 

[[Ca...]]

Loved the tale from Allie. A little insight to a parade day with horses etc.  We have the Calgary stampede parade on Saturday. I went once when our kids were little. It was a damn hot day. Haven't gone since.

Haven't done anything for Canada day.

 

Won't see the fireworks tonight either as I don't feel up to going to princes Island Park.

 

Happy Cd day

Carol

[[ba...]]

Well, I guess another Canuck Day has come and gone, but nice to hear from a few folks  ! For our rather reticent/polite  national thread, anything over one post per day is a veritable [non-Calgarian!] stampede, so thanks for participating!

 

Sorry to learn of your lawn mowing challenges, g33K; I must admit I've hit my share of, um, 'stuff' with various lawn mowers and tractors, and chipped a few blades  . We've sure got the grass growing like stink with the recent rain in the Ontario Golden Triangle i.e. I'm charging my weed whipper as I type! (That 'redneck solar pool heater'  sounds intriguing-feel free to elaborate on that project, eh?)

 

And Calgary Carol, thanks for the reminder of the Stampede, even if you didn't hit the parade et al. (I lived out in Alberta for a few years, and made it to Spruce Meadows and the Olympics-as a spectator  -but always seemed to skip the Stampede somehow.) You probably see enough 'once-a-year-cowboys' around town in early July without going too far, anyway!?

 

Last but not least, always good to hear from Navita, so thanks for the shout out, car dude; hope the cruising has been good so far  ! Hope everyone had a decent day...don't wait till next year to visit or post  .

 

p.s. as for me, mowed the lawn (without crashing, bonus!) and then ate strawberries  on a friend's deck while swapping horse-not horror??-stories!!