The Xanax Club, Let Us Know How You Are Feeling Today

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Hey EnzoIt - How are you doing?  I hope your vision and dizziness is improving!! 

 

I hope you are having a good day!!

 

Hugs,

Julia 

 

 

Hi Julia thanks for checking with me! I’m better thanks, what about you? I feel my brain fog is lifting little by little, I still get tired easily and when there is too much stimulation but I’m able to work a little and walk a few miles a day, so I guess I’m better!

 

Hi EnzoIt,

I am so glad you are better!  I know the brain fog can be hard to deal with sometimes, I have it too.  Some days it is better than others.  I will be glad when it goes away.  I am glad you are able to work and walk a few miles a day, that is awesome!!

 

I am hanging in there.  I have been having a really rough time but I am hoping to feel better soon.

 

I hope you have a good day!!

 

Julia 

[[En...]]

Julia I send you a hug and I hope we will be better sooner than later!

[[to...]]

Julia I send you a hug and I hope we will be better sooner than later!

 

Thank you so much for the hug!!    I totally agree!!!  You are getting so close.  Wow - .0625, that is great!!  I am happy you are so close to getting off this drug!!!

 

Julia 

[[ba...]]

Just an observation. Most of you are near the end, a few have jumped.

 

I am seeing a bit of a pattern in your experiences. All of you are suffering acute physical symptoms, mostly with the digestion, muscle pain, and vertigo/dizziness. I think that is because benzo's affect these 3 areas of the body the hardest. They destabilize our vestibular and occipital parts of the brain which affect vision and balance. Benzos are also muscle relaxers, the acute pain is your body having to learn that less benzo does not mean you are injured. Your  muscles need to learn how to return to a state of relaxation.

 

And the digestive system.

 

I think a whole book could be written on this. As I have said earlier, we have more gaba receptors in our digestive system than in our brains. From start to finish, our stomachs (the second brain) are just as affected as our CNS by this poison.

 

Also noticed that other medications (who isn't polydrugged?) are causing problems. Not sure why, but I am seeing it as a commonality.  This is especially present with digestive medication.

 

I am sorry the end road is so harsh. I am proud of all of you for not giving up because of the intensity of wd during this time. You will all get through this. It most likely wont be as smooth as you would like, but remember, even post jump we are healing, and healing is not linear. I personally know of many people who have "blow outs," and have to hold.  In fact, pretty much everyone hits hard waves as the body heals.  It's common.

 

We have to keep our eyes on the prize, long term benefit is the result of temporary (even if it's long) pain.

 

No matter how everyone got here, even if you feel you made mistakes, or are scared you wont heal (that fear is very very common) you are healing. You will get better. You will be free. This process is beyond hell on earth, period. Look towards a better future when you get scared. It is inevitable. Treat yourself with gentleness and eliminate any stress you can. use those muscles, even just for a walk or jumping jacks, they will love it. Very mild yoga. Your muscles are one area you can work on with appropriate exercise.

 

 

Proud of everyone

[[Di...]]

Hi Julia,

Finally...urgent care took xray didn't see anything thinks could be an ulcer or irritation from stress and everything that's gone on.  Doctor called he is leaning towards an ulcer, he knows the stress I've been under with losing mom and my daughter had told him before about the burning, he is treating me with carafate...I checked it with my other meds    I sure hope this takes care of it!!!

Thank you for all the prayers.

 

Are you feeling any better?

 

Love and prayers ❤❤❤

[[to...]]

Just an observation. Most of you are near the end, a few have jumped.

 

I am seeing a bit of a pattern in your experiences. All of you are suffering acute physical symptoms, mostly with the digestion, muscle pain, and vertigo/dizziness. I think that is because benzo's affect these 3 areas of the body the hardest. They destabilize our vestibular and occipital parts of the brain which affect vision and balance. Benzos are also muscle relaxers, the acute pain is your body having to learn that less benzo does not mean you are injured. Your  muscles need to learn how to return to a state of relaxation.

 

And the digestive system.

 

I think a whole book could be written on this. As I have said earlier, we have more gaba receptors in our digestive system than in our brains. From start to finish, our stomachs (the second brain) are just as affected as our CNS by this poison.

 

Also noticed that other medications (who isn't polydrugged?) are causing problems. Not sure why, but I am seeing it as a commonality.  This is especially present with digestive medication.

 

I am sorry the end road is so harsh. I am proud of all of you for not giving up because of the intensity of wd during this time. You will all get through this. It most likely wont be as smooth as you would like, but remember, even post jump we are healing, and healing is not linear. I personally know of many people who have "blow outs," and have to hold.  In fact, pretty much everyone hits hard waves as the body heals.  It's common.

 

We have to keep our eyes on the prize, long term benefit is the result of temporary (even if it's long) pain.

 

No matter how everyone got here, even if you feel you made mistakes, or are scared you wont heal (that fear is very very common) you are healing. You will get better. You will be free. This process is beyond hell on earth, period. Look towards a better future when you get scared. It is inevitable. Treat yourself with gentleness and eliminate any stress you can. use those muscles, even just for a walk or jumping jacks, they will love it. Very mild yoga. Your muscles are one area you can work on with appropriate exercise.

 

 

Proud of everyone

 

Hi Baddove,

 

Thank you so much for writing this post!!  It is encouraging and supportive and you have posted some very important things to remember.  It all makes sense that we would be having issues in these areas since they are the ones that are affected the hardest.  I did not realize that.  Thank you!!!

 

You are a very wise lady!!!  I appreciate you sharing all this information.  It helps to understand the why's of what is going on.  It still sucks but at least there is a logical explanation for it.

 

The polydrug thing is crazy.  Even when I just take a couple ibuprofen within a 48 hour period, it makes my system go crazy and I can not take the prilosec with the xanax or my symptoms go nuts and then my stomach hurts worse. 

 

Healing - thank goodness we are doing this as we go.  I totally agree that once we jump, there will be be bumps in the road but they will get better and within time complete healing will happen.  I used to look for post about post taper and want to see that people did not have issues but I stopped doing that as I now know no 2 people are alike and I know that when we jump, that too is a cut and we still have to deal with that and as we go down, things can get intense.  We have to keep moving forward as you said  - long term benefit is the result of temporary (even if it's long) pain.

 

Thanks for reminding us of what is happening to us!!

 

Please also be kind to your self and know that you are also doing great, especially with all you are going through, and you have stuck with your cut and you are doing better !!!  I am also proud of you!!!!  You can do this!!  You are doing this!!!!

 

Love you and sending you hugs,

Julia  :smitten:

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Hi Julia,

Finally...urgent care took xray didn't see anything thinks could be an ulcer or irritation from stress and everything that's gone on.  Doctor called he is leaning towards an ulcer, he knows the stress I've been under with losing mom and my daughter had told him before about the burning, he is treating me with carafate...I checked it with my other meds    I sure hope this takes care of it!!!

Thank you for all the prayers.

 

Are you feeling any better?

 

Love and prayers ❤❤❤

 

Hi Debbie - I am so glad you went to urgent care.  I looked up the carafate and I am hoping since it sticks to the lining of your stomach it will give you some relief.  I did see where it said to take on an empty stomach.  Ulcers do heal so that is a good thing too!!!

 

I am hoping and praying you get some relief now!!!  It sounds logical!!!  Keep me posted. 

 

I am doing better than earlier - like yesterday, I started to feel better with 3rd dose.  I believe I will level out within a few days which would be great!!!!!

 

I hope you start to feel much better soon!!!! 

 

Sending you love and hugs and prayers!!!

 

Love,

Julia  :smitten:

[[No...]]

Today was really hard for me. I woke up feeling okay just a bit anxious by mid afternoon my brain was telling me how terrible everything was and it frightens me because I don’t know how many more attacks I can take. Even when I was depressed I never had such panic in my brain. I can’t seem to enjoy anything any longer. It really scares me. Sometimes I wonder if my brain will ever recover from all this trauma. I hope it can. I will never take life for granted again. I miss visiting my family. I miss feeling safe. How do you hang in there when your scared of your own thoughts?

 

[[se...]]

Noseyrose,

 

Welcome, si glad you found us!

 

How do we get through this it?  You breathe, know tomorrow you are one day closer to freedom.  This is temporary, things will and “DO” get better.  There is always hope, you have support here, I promise, we each know exactly how you are feeling. 

 

Try to distract yourself with mindless TV.  I look at homes for sale on Trulia and try to imagine living in different places.  Allow yourself to escape the moments that are most difficult.

 

Your going to be fine, I promise.

[[30...]]

Nancy,

I am so sorry and I am also so sorry because I can SO relate. I am only a third of the way through my taper that had been going smooth - hit a rough patch and FEAR AND TERROR dominate my every day to the point that I am actually afraid to see my family.  I love them dearly but the fear is overwhelming and irrational.  how long have you been off?    keep me posted and feel free to PM if you would like

[[30...]]

actually Nancy I just read your thread and saw that you are not off - that you are tapering just like me.  yes, it is very disheartening.  as I felt things slipping away a few months ago I got m parents and family on a call with my therapist who is very understanding of my situation as he has been through it himself.  I had to stop working as well and find it hard to do much of anything honestly --- its sad.  I was super functional prior to having to go this after an adverse med reaction. 

 

fear and terror at intense and irrational levels are my biggest struggle --- each day is a battle.  hang in there!

[[Di...]]

Thank you Julia,

I am so glad you have felt better tonight.  Hoping tomorrow you will start feeling improvements earlier.

 

The doctor also prescribed famotidine  to take at bedtime.  Boy I sure hope these meds work.  I guess I got over stressed today so tonight has been rough.  My poor dad had ulcers for years I don't know how he did it.

 

Love and hugs❤

[[Di...]]

Hi Enzolt,

So glad you are feeling better that is wonderful.  Praying you keep improving you are getting down there.

 

Hugs❤

[[Di...]]

Thank you Baddove,

You have such a wonderful wealth of information.  I appreciate everything you always share with us.

 

You are amazing.

 

❤

[[Di...]]

Hey Laurie,

Was the doctor able to help you today?

 

Praying you are feeling better.

 

Hugs❤

[[Di...]]

Hello Noseyrose,

I am so sorry today was such a hard day for you.  We have to keep hanging on some days are much harder then others but there are better ones coming.

 

You will get lots of support here.

 

Praying tomorrow will be better for you.

 

❤

[[se...]]

Debbie and Julia, it sounds like you both might be turning a corner?  Debbie I am glad you went to the doctor, hopefully the medication will make all the difference.

 

I didnt find my doctor very helpful today.  She put me on thyroid medication and told me I should have the gallbladder surgery.  She as thrilled that I was able to get off the Xanax, but doesn’t seem to know much of anything about withdrawal.  Discouraging…

 

For the past few days I have felt sick with multiple trips to the bathroom, nausea, chills off and on, sweating and loss of appetite… just yuck.  In addition I have these bursts of adrenaline and anxiety..it’s so strange and miserable.  Hoping today things get a little better.

 

BD, your words/wisdom are so encouraging, thank you!

 

I hope everyone is hanging in there, today can only be better!

[[En...]]

Hi Enzolt,

So glad you are feeling better that is wonderful.  Praying you keep improving you are getting down there.

 

Hugs❤

 

Thanks Diane! How are you? I send you a hug

[[En...]]

I made a cut 2 nights ago and like usual after 2 days (at the beginning it was the day after the cut already) I get extreme mental and physical fatigue. I was happy yesterday of my progress but this thing is really difficult to handle, so many up and then downs.

[[to...]]

Today was really hard for me. I woke up feeling okay just a bit anxious by mid afternoon my brain was telling me how terrible everything was and it frightens me because I don’t know how many more attacks I can take. Even when I was depressed I never had such panic in my brain. I can’t seem to enjoy anything any longer. It really scares me. Sometimes I wonder if my brain will ever recover from all this trauma. I hope it can. I will never take life for granted again. I miss visiting my family. I miss feeling safe. How do you hang in there when your scared of your own thoughts?

 

Hi Noseyrose and welcome!!

 

I am so sorry you are having a rough time, there are so many of here that totally understand and relate to how you are feeling.  This is a good place for support and encouragement!  You are not alone in this here and we are a caring group who want you to succeed. 

 

I read this and it fits :

 

Just a word of encouragement, we do survive these medications and we do get better and we do heal despite them.

 

Being on a high dose of xanax is hard but you can get off of it. 

 

Have you looked at the tapering  boards?  Having a good taper plan really helps.  The link to the tapering plans information is :

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=56.0 

This should help you to decide what plan is best for you and give you an idea of how to do this. 

 

We are glad that you have found BenzoBuddies (BB) and that you are doing what is best for you and getting off xanax.

 

I hope your day is going better.

 

Take care and feel free to post as often as you want or need to!!

 

Julia

[[to...]]

Thank you Julia,

I am so glad you have felt better tonight.  Hoping tomorrow you will start feeling improvements earlier.

 

The doctor also prescribed famotidine  to take at bedtime.  Boy I sure hope these meds work.  I guess I got over stressed today so tonight has been rough.  My poor dad had ulcers for years I don't know how he did it.

 

Love and hugs❤

 

Hi Debbie,

How are you doing today?  i hope the meds are starting to help you with your stomach.  I am sure being stressed yesterday did make you feel rough last nigh and I hope today is better.

 

I have had ulcers since I was in my early 20's.  I was able to take zantac and that helped me alot.  My ulcers went away after some time.  I have had stomach issues for years and ulcers and IBS have been some of them.  I hope the meds help and yours goes away for you!!!

 

I am doing the same as yesterday, the 1st and 2nd dose are not doing much for me but I am sure after dose 3 it will get better like the last couple days.  I know it will take time to adjust!!  I will get there.

 

I hope you are able to get some porch therapy today and that you are feeling better.

 

Love and hugs,

Julia  :smitten:

[[to...]]

Debbie and Julia, it sounds like you both might be turning a corner?  Debbie I am glad you went to the doctor, hopefully the medication will make all the difference.

 

I didnt find my doctor very helpful today.  She put me on thyroid medication and told me I should have the gallbladder surgery.  She as thrilled that I was able to get off the Xanax, but doesn’t seem to know much of anything about withdrawal.  Discouraging…

 

For the past few days I have felt sick with multiple trips to the bathroom, nausea, chills off and on, sweating and loss of appetite… just yuck.  In addition I have these bursts of adrenaline and anxiety..it’s so strange and miserable.  Hoping today things get a little better.

 

BD, your words/wisdom are so encouraging, thank you!

 

I hope everyone is hanging in there, today can only be better!

 

Hi Laurie - I am sorry that your doctor did not make you feel any better.  I hope the thyroid meds help you!

 

I am so sorry you are having so many symptoms, it does sound like your CNS and brain are making adjustments and I know you are healing, it just sucks what you have to go through to get there but it will happen.  All your symptoms are hard and I know the anxiety one is really tough!!!  I am praying that you feel better soon!!! 

 

Sending prayers and hugs,

Julia 

[[to...]]

I made a cut 2 nights ago and like usual after 2 days (at the beginning it was the day after the cut already) I get extreme mental and physical fatigue. I was happy yesterday of my progress but this thing is really difficult to handle, so many up and then downs.

 

Hi EnzoIt,

I agree that this is hard to handle.  The ups and downs can be overwhelming some days but we get through it.  I just keep thinking about what other buddies say - This is temporary and we will get better and get through it!!

 

I am praying you feel better and sending you hugs!!  I hope the day gets better as it goes on.

 

Hugs,

Julia 

[[se...]]

Enzoit,  The good thing is you know that after two days you will feel the result of the cut.  Knowing helped me as I also knew it would pass a few days later.  Hang in there!

[[se...]]

Julia,

 

It sounds like you are doing ok with your cuts, hang in there!  I hope today is better for everyone.  I am feeling a little better however I am getting chills on and off.  My benzo brain is sending fears of COVID.