The Klonopin Klub

[[Di...]]

When tapering from 1mg Klonopin (clonazepam), is it best to dose 3-4 times in a 24-hour period of time?

[[Ju...]]

Wow- it has been a busy holiday weekend here on kklub! Well holiday for those of us in the US!

Looks like deinoncote took care of a lot of the newbie questions, all good advice. I just wanted to add for Ingrid that hormones are definitely a powerful cocktail- so I understand your hesitation. Symptoms of menopause seem similar to those of withdrawal. I haven't been through it yet so I can't help, but maybe it helps to say I understand what you are up against having dealt with major changes surrounding childbirth. If you have a knowledgeable doctor who can help then getting off benzos sooner rather than later is probably for the best.

 

Mark glad to know I have a fellow Valium convert. I'd be interested to know more about your taper plan and how it is going. I am happy to say that my daughters fever and my anxiety went away after two days.

 

Lets see if anyone wants to play this game:

Happiness is....

... Eating Popsicles with your kids with your feet in the kiddie pool.

[[Mo...]]

Hey klub!

 

Ive been absent a bit, mainly because of holidays/family stuff. My sister is pregnant, so that's pretty great and I look forward to being an uncle. For all the newcomers, welcome and I will be around to answer questions as im sure many others will as well as the holiday has passed .

 

My last month has mostly been minor waves followed by 2 day windows, rinse and repeat. Yesterday and today however have been a more intense wave. The usual for me: anxiety, depression, headaches, GI tract being obnoxious all over, and fatigue. I am still gluten free and do notice improvements in my GI system, so much so that when I am in a window I am completely free of my reflux free. I think I just need to take it easy tonight and tomorrow.

 

Oh and JKS:

Happiness is...

... Not wanting to sleep because you are so happy to be awake .

[[je...]]

Hello Mogeii.

 

Congratulations on the jump!  I love seeing those in here. 

 

I was looking at your list.. maybe it's a typo:

 

 

1.5mg Klonopin for 14 months

Started  Taper 1/17

1.25mg K until 1/24

1mg. K until 1/31- first moderate symptoms

.75mg K until 2/7

.5mg K until 2/28- first difficult symptoms

.25mg K only in AM until 3/21  <-------------------------------------------- was that supposed to be .125?  I see you went to that and jumped later

.125 K 3/21-4/4

Jumped 4/4

[[Mo...]]

No, not a typo jerry. I went from .5 to .25 then to .125. Just halving those last 3 doses until it was all gone!

[[je...]]

No, not a typo jerry. I went from .5 to .25 then to .125. Just halving those last 3 doses until it was all gone!

 

Wow... you're a strong person... the rest of your reductions were big, too.  I have been seeing so much

in here on taking it really slower toward the end.. it looks like you can handle those big cuts all the way;

I have a lot of respect for that, plus I'm jealous. 

 

Is it ok to ask if you're in any kind of talk therapy, or do you have other meds or supplements to help

you along the way?  Also, and I wonder this about a lot of people posting in here, have you ever

been diagnosed with a true underlying disorder? 

 

Forgive me if I've over stepped by asking you this stuff;  just tell me and I won't again. 

[[ja...]]

Ah, JKS - happiness! I have a lot these days. I'll try to pair it down, lol.

 

Happiness is...

 

...sitting out right now on our balcony at our new place with the paper and coffee - I have never had a balcony and I feel like I'm on vacation

 

...seeing my husband happy because of the new place

 

...looking up at the sun through the leaves and not even noticing how hot it is

 

No K sxs to speak of. I have a lot of fear because on the K, I was unable to put things away, to clean, etc. I feel like everything is a slippery slope that I need to climb out from. It scares me so much  :'(

 

Also, a lot of fear because in my last few years I have not been able to keep a job and even now, I'm unemployed. I'm baffled, because I lost the last 2 positions off the Klonopin. I've changed careers at this point and am going back to education in September (I have a job lined up), but what if I can't do that either? I feel like such a loser at this point. My husband goes to his job every day, and here I am at home. I got my BA and my MA on benzos, so I have no idea what I'm really meant to do  I'm actually thinking of taking a part-time job at the Supermarket.

 

*sigh* Maybe this is my mid-life crisis. That makes more sense, anyway.

 

I'm done complaining for the day. Hiya newbies, hi Mogeii, HUGE congrats to all jumpers!

[[...]]

happiness is new jumpers   Great news about your dau. JKS  :)   For the woman entering menapause, yes, sx are very similar... although I think what is really happening is the K tapped those sx down and now they are reappearing... hot flashes, sweating are  hardly bearable and I'm a ways past menapause.  Jaxy..glad to hear you got moved    Maybe we will never work again but we can sit on a balcony and enjoy the morning!   I didn't quite follow the thread but if someone is pregnant on this stuff... I think you really needto get off as judiciously as possible.  God help you and know my prayers are w/ both of you and Mogeii  I  know you will a great  :smitten: uncle.  For those still dry cutting very small amounts... you need a scale... its too easy for .006 to become .066 and that happens too often and I expect you;ll notice it... I do when I mess up... not that day but a couple of days later I'll be doingeverything right and wonder why things are spinning out ofcontrol.  But, nonetheless... to be that low is an exciting place to be.  I'll be there sometime later this week.   I can't believe its happening. ..that I've gotten this far. Njoy ( word to come out of meditations today... discover)

[[Hu...]]

Hey all.

So it's 4th day since I tapered. And today it happened as soon as I opened my eyes I had many different symptoms. Joint pains, Bone pains, tooth ache, muscle pain, 10 different pain/weird feeling on random parts of body, prickling pains, burning on hands, fingers, everywhere. Very out of this world type of pain feelings on body.. I hate this again.

It seems it always hits me in like 3rd or 4th day. Even yesterday I had almost no pains, it can change so quick. My tapers getting kinda bigger too now that 1.125mg to 1mg = 11.1%.

I don't want to mess with powder and little pieces yet so I don't care it's over 10%.

Also it seems my withdrawal are 90% physical always.. hardly mental. Weird.

Sorry about talking about my problems again, just wanted to share.

 

HPC

[[De...]]

Today I feel like my head is underwater and I can feel the Earth spinning.  I've slept most of the day - couldn't help it.  I'm fairly certain I took too much progesterone this morning.  My dose didn't change, but the way it's dosed did, and I screwed up!  Oh, well!  And I feel super bloated.

 

Menopause and hormones - I've been through menopause twice (artificially) and it sucks.  Hormone fluctuations make withdrawing much more difficult.  But... so does staying on the drug longer.  I would bite the bullet and begin withdrawing as soon as possible, despite menopause.  Low estrogen and progesterone may be even worse as getting balanced out seemed to help my withdrawal a lot. 

 

I decided to pursue hormone replacement therapy while in withdrawal, which had it's pluses and minuses.  But other than today, I seem to be all balanced out on that front.  Can't do anything about my brain or my adrenal glands being all over the place. 

 

Anyway, just checking in.  I've been off K for two weeks now.  Hooray!  I'm that much closer to the end of this journey.

 

Happiness is...

... having the time to sleep too much.

[[Mo...]]

No, not a typo jerry. I went from .5 to .25 then to .125. Just halving those last 3 doses until it was all gone!

 

Wow... you're a strong person... the rest of your reductions were big, too.  I have been seeing so much

in here on taking it really slower toward the end.. it looks like you can handle those big cuts all the way;

I have a lot of respect for that, plus I'm jealous. 

 

Is it ok to ask if you're in any kind of talk therapy, or do you have other meds or supplements to help

you along the way?  Also, and I wonder this about a lot of people posting in here, have you ever

been diagnosed with a true underlying disorder? 

 

Forgive me if I've over stepped by asking you this stuff;  just tell me and I won't again. 

 

Haha nope questions are welcome of course. I cut pretty fast and heavy, and I wouldn't say I "regret" it as much as I would advise people to be more cautious. I had an interesting case where certain cuts were so hard, while others were barely a change. This wasn't linear either. For instance I believe .75 to .5 was quite bad, but .5 to .25 was fairly easy. My worst symptoms however came 2 weeks after jumping. If I had to do it all again, I would have taken roughly twice as long to taper I think, but no more than that.

 

As for the other stuff, I saw a therapist weekly for 2 years and now biweekly. It is talk therapy and a little CBT. She has introduced me to 3 or 4 things that you would consider "practices" like certain breathing and meditation but the real value is just the hour of talking with her. It's really helpful for someone to want to talk and listen to you to determine how YOU are thinking/feeling instead of the usual conversation which is more of people just waiting to talk. Supplements are a tricky story for me and from my experience on BB a lot of people. Fish oils and a B complex are what I take daily and feel they both provide minor benefit for me. During my taper I tried melatonin and will say it DID help with getting to sleep but I feel my sleep quality was worse. Then I tried Valerian Root and it just wasn't helping anything and at times it made my morning worse anxiety wise. But keep in mind some people swear by valerian or melatonin so you never know what might work for you. I also take Magnesium for headaches. It works for mild tension headaches but for more severe tension headaches or migraines it is not helpful for me.

 

Now I have already typed a lot but if I gave you the full story of my original "diagnosis" you would need a cup of tea and be ready to read a short novel. So the condensed version is I was put on antidepressants at 18 for anxiety issues that were pretty standard. I developed depression during this time on antidepressants but honestly I had bouts of it when I was younger but never knew what it was and it wasn't nearly as severe. I was put on benzos during a 4 month long major depressive episode that included all the lovely suicidal ideations, mental hospitalization, and psychiatrists writing all kinds of diagnoses. So if you ask my psychiatrists I have General Anxiety Disorder and Major Depression Disorder with Panic Disorder as a possibility. Well in my opinion of my own brain, I never had a full blown panic attack before I was put on then taken off then put back on etc etc medications. My depression prior to meds was existential about purpose, how terrible people are to each other, more philosophical stuff that I hope doesn't make me seem like a pseudo-intellectual jerk haha. So what do I think I have? A Central Nervous System that overly reacts often, and a brain that at times can't turn off. But again, I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist with those disorders and thats why I was on benzos and antidepressants. Now I am off the benzos and my anxiety is no worse and in fact not having benzos to fall back on forces me to find new, better, and more effective ways to deal with it.

[[ho...]]

Good morning K Klub,

 

Alot has happened here since I left town for holiday week-end away. Welcome to all new members! I am continually amazed at how the people here keep pushing ahead. I gives me great comfort and much hope for my future.

 

The long week-end at the lake home with family was both fun and challenging. The added activity in many ways kept me distracted from sx but also I think in the long run added to them. I was 5 days with 5 children ages 3 to 9. I did have a melt down Sunday morning and had to apologize. It was very embarrassing. It happened with the adults, the kids were all outside thankfully and didn't see it. The response I got was one of concern for my health. I was very weepy all day.

Yesterday (day 8 after jump) was the worst day I have had in many months. Both physical and mental sx. I spent alot of time in bed, benzo flu, dizzy, blurred vision, headache, depression. I find it MUCH easier to deal with the physical  . The depression is tough. Today I feel much better thank God. My hope is that now that I am back home and can live within my normal routine that things will keep improving. I am alone all day while my husband is working. Today I am really enjoying the peace and quiet and my mind is quieter.

 

Congrats to those who have jumped!

 

Congrats to those who keep plodding ahead with their tapers!

 

Hugs and warm wishes to those who are struggling. My prayers are with us all.

hopeful2013

[[je...]]

So if you ask my psychiatrists I have General Anxiety Disorder and Major Depression Disorder with Panic Disorder as a possibility. Well in my opinion of my own brain, I never had a full blown panic attack before I was put on then taken off then put back on etc etc medications. My depression prior to meds was existential about purpose, how terrible people are to each other, more philosophical stuff that I hope doesn't make me seem like a pseudo-intellectual jerk haha. So what do I think I have? A Central Nervous System that overly reacts often, and a brain that at times can't turn off. But again, I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist with those disorders and thats why I was on benzos and antidepressants. Now I am off the benzos and my anxiety is no worse and in fact not having benzos to fall back on forces me to find new, better, and more effective ways to deal with it.

 

Mogeii, thank you so much for taking the time to write such a clear sketch of your situation and ordeals and your outlook. 

 

I read in this and the Social Anxiety forum and some others that went by the wayside as they had ads for supplements and

"techniques," etc.  I just wanted raw experience and have been reading and reading in efforts to find the closest story to

mine.. I tend to pick out elements of people's stories that I can relate to, but it is not lost on me that we as humans are

quite complicated in our reactions to the things that we discover about ourselves, and in our healing processes, thus the

oft repeated phrase in all of these forums:  we're all different. 

 

It's the similarities that I seek.. and I do know that one of the reasons for that is just loneliness.  I admit that;  I want to find

a person who can relate to me and.. well.. I guess I'll stop there because it hurts to bring it up;  just wanted to be honest.

 

Thank you again for sharing that.. it was wonderful to click into here and see a direct answer to my queries.  You do sound

quite brave (that was the feeling I got also reading in the "cold turkey" area here.. wow!).

 

I've got my scale now;  a microgram scale I ordered on line.  Yesterday was my first day of weighing out my doses, and I

found out right away that without it, all this time doing it by just eye-balling the pieces, etc, I was real close to being

right on,  .. hehe  lol, it made me smile and then I felt myself laugh a little bit.  Then that, the laughing, triggered even more

hope than I had before because I could just laugh! 

 

It was only 22 dollars and free shipping.. and I'll use it just to be precise, but the whole anxiety of waiting for it and then

finding out I was doing fine without it really helped me to understand something about myself, and my condition.  Hard

to explain, but the short version is that I'm not as messed up as I have been thinking I was.  ... lol.. I in a way CHOOSE

to have anxiety about some things I guess.  It's just where I have a habit of going.  So.. yes, I will report this to my

therapist (couple of times a month, talk therapy and as you said for those very reasons and she's impartial, etc).

 

Thank you again.. big warm cyber hugs for you. 

 

- Jerry

[[Ju...]]

Loving all the happiness posts- keep it coming!

 

Jaxnj in the past when I have had career "breaks" I have spent the whole time stressing about the next job instead of enjoying the time to rest. I know your career change is going to be great for you. you are such a caring and strong person, people who get to have your help in real life are lucky! Dont feel guilty about not working now, store up the energy for when you need it later!

 

Mogeii I want to say I agree with your assessment of your situation. I had moderate-severe postpartum anxiety after the birth of my first child that was (in hindsight) exacerbated by two rapid attempts of on again off again zoloft that made things much much worse. That's how klonopin came into my life when before anxiety had always been very situation specific suddenly I had a GAD diagnosis that never seemed to go away. When I did my first taper on something like your schedule my symptoms were also worst afterwards, but my doc at the time told me it was GAD and I didnt know any better so back I went. If nothing else our suffering brings knowledge!

[[Di...]]

Hi to everyone!

 

Great post Mogeii. You're my hero.

 

 

 

I just wanted to say something about tinnitis.  I have it now.  I think most folks talk about it being a benzo w/d symptom, BUT I had it a long time before being on a benzo...I just didn't know what it was until I started reading on this board  .  I notice it mostly when I'm at home and it's quiet, no tv going, or any other noise.  I sleep at night with a fan turned on so it doesn't bother me too much.

[[Mo...]]

Hi to everyone!

 

Great post Mogeii. You're my hero.

 

 

 

I just wanted to say something about tinnitis.  I have it now.  I think most folks talk about it being a benzo w/d symptom, BUT I had it a long time before being on a benzo...I just didn't know what it was until I started reading on this board  .  I notice it mostly when I'm at home and it's quiet, no tv going, or any other noise.  I sleep at night with a fan turned on so it doesn't bother me too much.

 

That is REALLY nice of you to say Disney. Hero is not something I would consider myself to anyone haha. I appreciate the sentiment though. Tinnitus has always been curious to me, since I almost never get it pre or post benzos. I had a friend though in college who had chronic tinnitus that caused him insomnia. He said at times it was so bad that he would have to go out in the middle of the night in his car and drive around with the radio on so he could drain out the sound but not wake his roommates. He ended up finding that white noise machines and a certain medication I can't remember provided him relief. Before meeting him I thought tinnitus was like an itch, something we all complain about but it's really not a big deal. Turns out I was wrong! As for yours, I am glad the fan works. Maybe look into white noise stuff if you need some extra relief?

 

Depression has descended upon me again. It sucks pretty bad but I am a veteran at this these days. The sweating is back again as well and that is really annoying as i'm sure others have experienced. Read for an hour then notice your shirt is so damp you need to change..such a nuisance.

[[fr...]]

Started having diarrhea while in tolerance withdrawal. It was one of the signs that something wasn't right. Now, if I take more than 1/16 mg, I get diarrhea. Sometimes I have a burning feeling in my stomach, other than that now not too much going on. Loss of appetite for about a month, now I'm hungry all the time.

[[De...]]

Frus, I'm glad you said something.  I've been having the same issue with appetite for quite some time now.  It's really up and down.  It's like there's no off switch - I start eating and don't stop, and it's compulsive.  I find myself thinking about food when I'm not shoving it in my face.  I hate it! I've gained a lot of weight, much of which cannot be explained by appetite alone. 

 

Mogeii... depression sucks.

 

Things I would like to eradicate in the world:

1. Mean people

2. Hunger

3. Depression

 

Although 1. would probably take care of a lot of 2. and 3.

 

I haven't dealt with it a whole lot in this process - lot's of it in my past - but it's hit me hard today.  I have thoughts chasing each other in my brain concerning a rather minor infraction of a friend.  (Just saying that helped a lot.  Feeling a bit more centered.)  I feel out of control, like it wouldn't be unreasonable for me to punch a rude person at the grocery store, or find them later and punch them. 

 

The horrific weight gain... it effects how I feel about myself.  I know it's not really my fault, but other people don't know that.  Most people just see that I've gained 20lbs and they probably think I'm eating my problems instead of facing them (which was true one day last week, but for the most part it's not.)  :'(

 

Today was a hard day.  I was in a lot of mental and physical pain.  I kept myself from napping to try to get on a better schedule, but that may have been a mistake.  I probably should have slept through it, but I don't know - maybe I'll sleep really good tonight and everything will be fine in the morning. 

 

You all are a wonderful support.  Somehow, knowing I'm not alone is a huge comfort, even though I wouldn't wish this on anyone.  (Except maybe some select mean people.)

[[Sk...]]

Things are getting rough with me.  I didn't think withdraw would be this tough. 

 

I am dealing with hives all over my body and a swath of other horrid symptoms I never thought would emerge.  Please pray for me.

 

-SZ-

[[Im...]]

Hi everyone Just checking in Love that alot of folks have jumped but hate to hear some of you are having alot of wd sx's. Please hang in there! I want you all to know I'm here for you if you need an ear. I can't help alot because I am still learning myself but all you guys are in my thoughts and prayers... I am a good listener tho. I know I have needed you guys before and you have been there for me. Words can't express what that means to me. I hate that ant of you have to go thru this but I'm glad to know I'm not alone in this sea of wd. The loneliness we sometimes feel while going thru this is simply the pits. Most folks don't have a clue what we go thru unless they have walked a mile or two in our shoes!!! That is what I love about BB. All you guys know what most of us face ea day and I just don't know what I would do without you guys and BB. Be good to yourself and remember I do have good ears even with the tinnitus... and looping sound... and all kind of other wd sx. That is one thing about cyber space we can write, and write, and write and that does seem to help me sometimes.

 

                                                              Imsaved

 

Laelani, Deinoncote, Elwood, Terraform, Disney Girl, JKS, Mogeii, Jerrycarl, Jaxnj, Njoy, HPC, Hopeful2, Frus, Skyzone,  (Hope I haven't left anyone out) and everyone at BB and K club are in my thoughts and prayers Please remember me as well Thanks guys!!!

 

Cold turkey off Klonipin 2mg three times a day

A month later found a Dr to listen and started me all over on Klonipin (2mg three times a day)

Since I had been without it anyway started out on 3mg a day (1mg three times a day)

First taper to 2.5 mg a day Couldn't handle it (1mg twice a day 1/2mg once a day)

Went up to 2 and 3/4 pill a day ( 1mg twice a day 3/4 mg once a day)

Down to 2 and 1/2 pill again Please pray ( 1mg twice a day and 1/2 once a day)

Down to 2 pills a day ( 1mg twice a day)

                                                                 

[[...]]

Imsaved... so right about the write and write and write... I'm beginning to realize that i have written my way through most of this... and it has helped!  I've documented my journey, been able to whine when I needed to and helped when I could.  I think this has been a strategic part of the success I have felt through out this ordeal.  I still have a lot of fear about jumping and sometimes I think that fear more than actual success stories keep many of us tapering... slowly. Its a tough decision.  I want this gone so bad.  It has been good to read that people are able to tolerate the effects of jumping after a slow taper.  Makes it feel all worth while because when I tried to c/t and the 4 wk and then the 6 wk tapers by doctors were very frightening and dealing w/ the thought of that returning has been the primary motivation in my sticking to the schedule I have laid out for myself.  Tinnitus... I've had it my whole life ( I was hit by a train when I was 2) but it got markedly louder after i had cut about 25% of my initial dose.  I find it heartening that even those of you who have jumped and are ex. sx.  You are here!  You are not gone and in some ER or Rehab or psych ward somewhere.  I hope you know how encouraging that is for the rest of us... well...at least me.  Sky... you know my prayers are w/ you.  Stop and stay where you are for awhile if things are too difficult.  Deinocote:  I would be one of the mean people that has to go.  I wasn't always this way... but I'm the first to admit... it has done something to my ability to endure any stress.  My sweetie left the light and radio on the other night... I woke up in the middle of the night and railed him for not being more  sensitive to my needs for sleep.    You'd a thought he'd done me some great injustice.  I did get calmed down and apologized and he has agreeed to wear headphones when he listens to the radio in bed.    Happiness is having people in your life that remain true to you even when they don't understand what is happening to you :angel: :angel:for everyone.  Njoy

[[Ju...]]

Sorry to hear that the sadness is coming down. I know this is easier to say than do, but I am trying really hard to accept whatever comes. Skyzone- when you say you didn't think it would be his hard- for me that disconnect between expectation and reality can be one of the hardest parts of the struggle. When I just accept that it IS then somehow it gets easier. This is a bit off topic but maybe it will inspire others as it did for me. Out of the mouths of babes (as they say):

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3563572

[[Ch...]]

My tinnitus has been particularly bad over the past week. Today I found an easy method to help diminish the intensity of the non-stop piercing buzz. Anything that helps the least bit is wonderful, if you ask me.

 

http://www.beinghealthynaturally.com

 

Since others here have been discussing tinnitus today, you might want to check it out.

 

Gingko Biloba and CoEnzymeQ10 might also help.

 

 

 

 

 

[[ho...]]

Hi Klub,

 

Wonderful that so many are posting... wow, how helpful it is!!!

I have experienced the things discussed today, still experience some things.

 

Mogeii: for me the depression comes and goes, I just hate it.

 

frus333: I have had the GI issues too, they also seem to come and go as my body adjusted to cuts.

 

Deinoncote: You jumped 1 week before me. I know that how it goes for you may not be how it goes for me but I can't help but wonder and watch for your posts. Day 8 after jumping (so far) was the worst for me. Thankfully yesterday was better and today even better (mentally).

 

SkyZone: I've been wondering how you were doing. Sorry it's hard right now. When it got bad for me I held a bit longer, although not until sx were totally gone. They would subside even more a couple days after I resumed the taper. I got hives too, it sucks. Of course I will pray for you. It got rough for me at the lower doses too.

 

Imsaved: Your positive attitude is an inspiration to me. I think it is very important in this process in order to get through it. I think it is wonderful that you post here and encourage others.

 

Njoy: I can relate to what happened with your sweetie. Last Sunday I had a meltdown and over reacted to a situation with my family. I'm not suggesting that you over reacted. Just saying that for me, I feel like I struggle so hard to keep things cool when I really don't feel that way at all inside. I try to keep things (normal). And every once in a while the dam breaks. I was so embarrassed. Then due to the lovely depression, I couldn't let it go and was weepy the rest of the day and all the next day.

 

JKS: I watched the video, thank you. I agree that acceptance of our withdrawal process is key to getting through it. I want very much for this to all be over so it gets hard sometimes to accept what I cannot change.

 

Oh, this journey is hard. Thank you ALL for your posts. They give me strength and hope. We have come so far, there is hope there too. So glad I can see my progress.

Sending peace and hope to all. You're in my prayers every day. Try to find some joy today if only for a little while.

 

hopeful2013

[[Sk...]]

NJoy, JustKeep Swimming, Hopeful

 

Thank you all for your words of support. 

 

JustKeep:  I will have to accept it for what it is.  You are right.  Thank you

 

Hopeful: Thank you for remembering me

 

NJoy: Thanks for the support.

 

To all my fellow Klubblers:  Please hang in there and we will win this fight!

 

-SZ-