You will heal too!

[[Re...]]

Thanks Cedar,

 

I hope I can stay strong and positive.

 

Remmie

[[ce...]]

Thank you Cedar. You've been a real light!

I'm grateful to have you here on BB sharing your stories, you are a true inspiration!

Melo x

Hello Chris!  Thanks for stopping by! 

 

Hope you are doing well. 

[[...]]

hii every body, how u guys doing ?

[[pr...]]

Hey Hoda,

 

How are things.  Got a post that was pretty hard to take the other day.  I get them every once in a while.  Spent some time at the Humane Society with some dogs yesterday.  Brought up some good things and some guilt about me letting 3 of my dogs get hit by cars.  There is no excuse for me allowing that to happen to my precious little guys.  Having a tough time getting started this morning.  I always do unless I have something I have to do.  I know I have to get out today like every day.  I can't stay  in my little apartment cooped up all day.  I think this has got to be much more difficult than AA.  One day at a time.  I don't know though.  I am not a recovering Alcoholic going to meetings. 

God Bless You,

 

David

[[...]]

hii, david iam sorry about ur doges, i also last couple dayes  idont feel great but iam try to make my self busy ,couz when i think about what ihave and stress on it make me  worse plus i went to Walmart and i hate to go big malls its killing me feel my over load on my head and my eyes but ididnt have choice.

[[pr...]]

stay strong Hoda,

 

God Bless You,

 

David

[[...]]

thx david , iwill.

[[ce...]]

Hi Hoda.    Great job surviving Walmart.  I know it's no picnic when you feel rotten.   

 

Hey David. Sorry about your sweet dogs.  Don't beat yourself up though, okay?  It's rough getting started with your day when you feel miserable and tired.  I remember those days well and pushing myself to get out the door.  Getting started is hard, but it gets easier the more you do it.  Give yourself a pep talk each day.  That's what I did.  I would say, "Common, you can do it!  You're going to have a great day toay!"  Put on some happy positive inspiring music and sing along.  Anything to lift your spirits.  Even dance in the kitchen when making breakfast.  I did this and would laugh at myself. If only others saw it!  Ack!

[[pr...]]

Hi Hoda.    Great job surviving Walmart.  I know it's no picnic when you feel rotten.   

 

Hey David. Sorry about your sweet dogs.  Don't beat yourself up though, okay?  It's rough getting started with your day when you feel miserable and tired.  I remember those days well and pushing myself to get out the door.  Getting started is hard, but it gets easier the more you do it.  Give yourself a pep talk each day.  That's what I did.  I would say, "Common, you can do it!  You're going to have a great day toay!"  Put on some happy positive inspiring music and sing along.  Anything to lift your spirits.  Even dance in the kitchen when making breakfast.  I did this and would laugh at myself. If only others saw it!  Ack!

 

Cedartree,  Maybe that is what got you through all this.  Your ability to think positive and dance in the kitchen.  I'm just not capable of that.  I don't think I ever was.  Hard to tell at this moment but I have been dealing with depression for all my life.  Had I known the side effects of the meds though I may have preferred the depression.  But until you have had these withdrawal symptom i don't think I could have believed that a doctor would give me something like this that could make this happen,

 

Just in a "wave" right now. and they seem to be getting worse for me.  crying more often worrying.

 

I am happy you are healed but as you know this process is very individualized.  Thanks for being around.

 

God Bless You,

 

David

[[ce...]]

No, you make it sound as though it were in some way "easy" for me to speak positively and do these things.  It was hard as hell.  I'd lived my entire life sick and depressed and felt that if I were to have any chance at any life at all I'd better transform my thinking.  I had the worst kind of negative thinking, and through withdrawal turned it around.  It was never easy. It was as miserable as you can imagine.  I honestly apologize if I gave off the vibe that it's something you can just do one glorious day.  No, it took a lot of hard work and real effort to force this behavior and thinking.  Instead of saying oh poor me, I'm so miserable (which was of course true), I said the opposite....I'm happy, healthy and alive!  You know?  One changed thought at a time.  Eventually my body and mind lined up with what I was saying out loud. 

[Guest [...]]

I love you cedartree wouldnt know you if I passed you in the street but your compassion and strength drives me and you are right.  I know that you were in hell my friend you truly were and the early days you were so sick I think reading your story makes me aware of how sick you were but you are talking about how once your a little better about changing your thinking.  Its all true the negative thinking is just sooooo bad and in withdrawal you cant change that but as we recover we need to look at how we can help ourselves.

 

So whats doing for you today Ms you baking any bread.

 

Lizzyxx

[[ce...]]

Hey Miss Lizzy!  You are such a sweetheart.  LOL, no bread today.  Making risotto.  Mmmmmm. 

 

[Guest [...]]

yummy i cant master risotto no matter what i do noone likes it in the house i do though i had chicken and risotto at a friends the other day was so nice.

 

I need to get of the couch cedartree to much socialising.

 

Lizzyxx

[[ce...]]

  Too much socializing.  You crack me up. 

[[...]]

hii cedartree my best friend  , ihave question what was the signs made u know u start healing before and was the last symptoms uhad , cous to me it seems icant go in the malls tell now its bother me the big lights there .

[[to...]]

hi Cedar...I am very glad you made it...I am 19 months of....but still have food sensitivity I just eat plain foods...otherwise I would get slammed did you do a special diet and how food doing with you at this point...put on too much salt the other day and felt really ugly after getting better...my stomach and tummy is still bloated and my stomach is tensioned still wow what a ride

[[ce...]]

Hey Hoda. Anxiety and dizziness were some of my last symptoms.  Light sensitivity is bad, so keep those shades on my man! 

 

Hi Tommy. Yeah, I eat really whole foods too. I avoid gluten, but in withdrawal avoided salts, sugars and processed foods for the most part.  GI issues are miserable.  Do you keep a food journal to log what you've eaten and list what bothers you and what doesn't?  That helps me a lot.  I'm doing okay now, but GI issues were always my sore spot too. 

[[...]]

thx cedartree, ur my support 

[[tu...]]

Anxiety & dizziness (my worst symptoms by far).  I'm pretty sure they will be the last ones to leave also.  Cedar, how did you deal with the anxiety (how did it show up for you? - for me, it is intersections while driving and busy stores)?  What tools helped you manage the anxiety?  Did it eventually just fall away completely or do you still have to manage it?

[[ce...]]

Ah TG. Yeah anxiety is a bitch. Stores and intersections were so horrid to cope with before.  I feel your pain.  I do a lot of deep breathing, especially when I'm driving.  It helps me to get balanced and focused on what I'm doing.  Anxiety is pretty much gone.  I still stuggle with stress just like anyone else does, but overall, no panic attacks, no chronic anxiety anymore.  Everyday I try to focus on what makes me happy.  Who knew that being happy would actually combat anxiety as well as depression?  I'm learning new things everyday. 

[[al...]]

Ah TG. Yeah anxiety is a bitch. Stores and intersections were so horrid to cope with before.  I feel your pain.  I do a lot of deep breathing, especially when I'm driving.  It helps me to get balanced and focused on what I'm doing.  Anxiety is pretty much gone.  I still stuggle with stress just like anyone else does, but overall, no panic attacks, no chronic anxiety anymore.  Everyday I try to focus on what makes me happy.  Who knew that being happy would actually combat anxiety as well as depression?  I'm learning new things everyday. 

 

special people give back to others in need.i for one thank you because im going thru alot of symptoms at

71 days off clonazapam.i also have been off an on a mixture of xanax,valium,clonazapm over two years.

off about two mths at a time only to go back on not knowing what was wrong.your post helped me after reading post today on lord sandwich saying some damage permenant.

symptoms

 

itchy/crawling feeling on skin

gi issues/bloating,destended ab

pain in ribs

head/neck tension

frequent urine

leg pain/feet pain pins and needles /stinging

pain in groin

surgery site pain/spasms

praying something gives soon

[[tu...]]

Cedar:  So driving (intersections) is still tricky for you or is that problem gone now?  Here is what I experience now (it has improved since going off the Ambien - before it was so awful).  Now (depending on the day and how much anxiety I am experiencing and also how busy/long the intersection is) I get butterflies in my stomach and dizzy to varying degrees.  I do what I can to tell myself it is just anxiety and that I will be okay.  I used to love to drive and could drive anywhere.  I had no phobias about driving.  Now, I avoid busy intersections.  Try to stay within a 5 mile radius of home.  Often have to have others drive me (like this last week).  Do not use the freeway (don't drive far enough to need to).  I am a bit insecure and embarassed I am this way now.  It has shaken my confidence.

 

I kind of gathered from your last post that you still struggle with this - is that true?  Please be honest.  If I need to learn to live with this I am going to approach it differently than if it will just fall away on its own in time.

 

Thanks for always replying.  I am sure it feels like I have asked you the same questions 25 different ways.  It really helps to hear from you.

[[Re...]]

Alan99,

 

Who wrote damage is permanent?

[[ce...]]

Hi Alan. It takes a long while for those symptoms to go.  It's only been a couple of months, so don't freak out yet.  This is very normal for healing to take a long time.

 

TG I have no symptoms anymore.  I was just empathizing because I remember struggling with driving after not driving at all for 2 whole years!  Still can't believe I was out of it for that long.  Trust me, you will recover.  That's why I titled my success story this way. It's hard for any of us to believe it takes this long to heal, but it does.  Don't despair. 

[[al...]]

Alan99,

 

Who wrote damage is permanent?

 

it was a post yesterday about a Lord Sanwich speech.freaked me out .as only thing keeping me going is that one magic day ill be okay.this is torture.