Wild Soul, Running Free

[[Wi...]]

 

    finally got to sleep last night.took a cal/mag tablet and apparently that is just what my

body needed..It gave me energy so I got up and cleaned the bathroom and kitchen..then I

went to bed around 2:30 and the last time I looked at the clock it was 3:00am..so I must have went to sleep around that time...I got up this morning at 9:00am and had a little anxiety..

ate a bowl of cereal ,took my 2.5mg and went to my new job..done just fine until me and my daughter went out to eat .we went to mr ghattis.and had the pizza and salad bar and with nothing else diet to drink but diet coke.I got it and am now suffering the consequences from it...It threw me into anxiety mode...I am still there even though I went ahead and took the other 2.5mg valium..I am dealing with it though..I shouldn't have drunk the diet coke..I haven't had any caffeine in a while..for me caffeine hurts my body worse that alcohol.I have figured that much out.. I am having crawling sensations in my head  and tightness in my chest and vision is messing with me too .I also have a pounding heart and increased bladder function and my stomach is on fire...wow!! all that from a diet coke...maybe I haven't stabilized yet ..or maybe my body is screwed up beyond repair..please tell me the latter is not true....

  I am quite sure it is just the benzos though...only time will tell ..just had to vent a little..

still gotta go to the YMCA and to ball practice and cook supper so my day is far from over..

I feel so overwhelmed right now too and that doesn't help any...bills are coming due with not enough funds to pay them .. I sure hope hubby gets that good job which is contingent on him getting his heart rate down and getting in shape..Really trying to be his health coach through all this too and get him on the right track .He wants that job really bad and we need for him to get that job too.Otherwise I will have to pick up another job at night in addition to my day job and I am not sure my body would cooperate with doing this w/d and all..whats a girl to do?

  I dunno ,we will make it I suppose.gotta do what ya gotta do..Just have a lot of stuff on my mind right now..

At least my anxiety has calmed a bit and I am feeling better...  but did I mention my hair is still falling out! what is up with that?

oh well I am through whining for now...it just been one of those days....

thanks for letting me vent ..it really helps me out a lot..

 

thanks to all you dear friends....Nola

 

 

[[Be...]]

Nola - 

 

You're having a pretty good day (except for the diet coke. ) I'm the same way about caffeine.  I'm so glad to hear the new job went well. That's huge. 

 

I just wanted to mention again, though, that you need to stay on a consistent dose of valium for at least a week before tapering.  Since you seem to need to take an extra 2.5mg fairly often, I will again recommend that you get back on 2.5 mg 2x/day for a week or more. It's no good taking valium "as needed".  Besides need to break the habit of popping a pill for anxiety, the up and down of the blood level will make you more symptomatic than you need to be.  I want you to eel the best  you can while you are tapering. 

[[Wi...]]

 

  Hey Beeper,

 

  yeah I guess I had a pretty good day.I am still not symptom free though..my stomach is on fire and my allergies are going haywire..is that caused by w/d or part of w/d ? do you know..

I know I have allergies but don't normally need to take an allergy pill unless I am symptomatic.so needless to say I broke down and took one (zyrtec) today..

they normally make me feel tired but not so much tonight..haven't took one in a while...

my right side is hurting again and has been all evening where I had my gb out..maybe its like doc said just muscles .maybe they are just tensing up or something .I dunno but it makes me wanna take a hydro for the pain or a muscle relaxer or something..may be reflux ..I dunno but it ...along with all the other symptoms is driving me insane...My cup is running over today and I need some relief here.. :'( ......

  I can still got out to town and function normally from the outside looking in but I hide my pain and symptoms pretty well..always have.. guess thats why noone takes me seriously around here (home)..I just keep going anyways...and doing what I got to do... ;)ya know..

they don't know the mental and physical pain I go through on a day to day basis..

  Gosh I wish this pain would ease up.. :'(it is really getting to me now..don't notice it as bad when I am up moving but I am tired and have had a long day and ready to relax...

I took a nexium just in case it is relflux..don't take em every day like I am supposed to..hate taking drugs..  ...I know I am rambling here...sorry .but I have been a whiney but these past few days ..at least I can post what I feel here and not feel guilty about it.. thanks you guys and gals....just going through a rough time right now..I am still optimistic though ..I know it will get better sooner or later ..I just wish it was sooner....still don't feel like I am stable yet though ...hope that happens sometime in the next few days..I hope I haven't damaged my gabbas too much . don't wanna take more than 5mg a day to get there either..that would be defeating my purpose...I am really addicted to those little blue pills ..never would have thought they would do me this way and too such an extent...I really need to get a grip here..been fighting t/w for a year or two and full blown since may ..I am just so tired of this crap..get stable and then I am not stable ..make the cut =not stable again..this so extreme...

ok that's it I am officially done whining for now... ..its all my fault anyways...

 

[[Be...]]

 

   Hey Beeper,

 

  yeah I guess I had a pretty good day.I am still not symptom free though..my stomach is on fire and my allergies are going haywire..is that caused by w/d or part of w/d ? do you know..

I know I have allergies but don't normally need to take an allergy pill unless I am symptomatic.so needless to say I broke down and took one (zyrtec) today..

they normally make me feel tired but not so much tonight..haven't took one in a while...

my right side is hurting again and has been all evening where I had my gb out..maybe its like doc said just muscles .maybe they are just tensing up or something .I dunno but it makes me wanna take a hydro for the pain or a muscle relaxer or something..may be reflux ..I dunno but it ...along with all the other symptoms is driving me insane...My cup is running over today and I need some relief here.. :'( ......

   I can still got out to town and function normally from the outside looking in but I hide my pain and symptoms pretty well..always have.. guess thats why noone takes me seriously around here (home)..I just keep going anyways...and doing what I got to do... ;)ya know..

they don't know the mental and physical pain I go through on a day to day basis..

 

I know what you mean, Nola.  Once in a while it would be nice to get a little sympathy at least, a little "oh, my poor baby".    Sometimes we are the only ones available to give us comfort and understanding.  You know what you go through to provide and care for your family so give yourself a pat on the back and a hug. 

 

I hope I haven't damaged my gabbas too much . don't wanna take more than 5mg a day to get there either..that would be defeating my purpose...I am really addicted to those little blue pills ..never would have thought they would do me this way and too such an extent...I really need to get a grip here..been fighting t/w for a year or two and full blown since may ..I am just so tired of this crap..get stable and then I am not stable ..make the cut =not stable again..this so extreme...

ok that's it I am officially done whining for now... ..its all my fault anyways...

 

Hon, valium takes a while to build up in your system.  If you would start taking 2.5 mg 2x/day at about the same time every day for a week  or two, you will feel better.  It may not even take that long but you need to give it a chance to settle things down.  Then I would recommend you start cutting by no more than .5mg/week.  By going slowly you can avoid or lessen most symptoms which makes the whole thing more bearable.  You don't deserve to suffer even if you do think you are at fault. 

 

 

[[Wi...]]

 

  thanks Beeper for the kindness your send in your messages...I know it is gonna take some time..I gotta be patient..I am taking the 2.5mg 2x day so maybe it will get me where I need to be soon enough...I hope so..

  I so feel overwhelmed at times with all the stuff I gotta do  ..it is so frustrating ..I am just in a pissy mood right now...can't wait till I get stablized ....

  I just got invited to a cookout this weekend AGAIN...where drinking will be involved  AGAIN and I  am not sure how strong I will be. gonna be seeing some friends who are coming down from West Virginia we haven't seen in a while...I tell you.. all we know how to do is party down here in TN..it seems that way anyhow..grill out ..shoot some bull..and get drunk.and build fires...boy if we ain't true hillbillies...I don't know what is... ...

could be worse I guess..could be into hard drugs .. not me though...too scared of that stuff...benzos have sure taught me a lesson... 

  well I know it is late...so I am gonna get off  here and treat myself to some downtime so well deserved....love you guys and gals....thanks so much for being here for me...

 

                          trying to be strong and hanging in there... N

[[Wi...]]

 

    I sure didn't want to get up today..felt like I was coming down with the crud or something.My throat was sore and I was achey and just not feeling well.My hubby went to bed

early last night because of the same...I took 50mg zinc and a B-complex ,eat me a bowl of oatmeal and went on to work..I am feeling some better but no energy at the moment...

  I think I am gonna lay back down and take a nap for a bit and see what that does .I gotta go and work out at the Y tonight anyways and weigh in ..Have a feeling I havent done so well  as far as weight loss...had too many ups and downs this past week...I am feeling calmer though so that is a good sign...      

 

               

   

 

[Guest [st...]]

Hi, Nola,

 

I have got to give you credit for all the activity you do.  I couldn't leave my house during my withdrawal process.  All the symptoms you have mentioned in your posts are typical.  Still losing some hair, too.  Thank goodness it is pretty thick.  Of course, I have to mention that you shouldn't drink alcohol during this time BUT you will do what you want (LOL).  Hope you have stabilized on the Valium.  Very important.  Wishing you a good window soon.

 

Patty  xo

[[Wi...]]

 

 

  OK...bad day....I feel like I am everyone's slave in this house..I wanna go on fricken strike and just leave em to roll in their own nastiness...I am so fed up today..I have having it out

with my oldest daughter about a cell phone for 2 days now...Nothing gets  done around here unless I do it or become master drill sergeant  which I hate or just go the h*** off on everyone.I am having a hard enough time with w/d and they want to take me for granted on

top of that.. :tickedoff:....

  I cook & clean the house ,do everyones laundry ,do dishes (they know where the fricken dishwasher is)they do good to get em in the sink much less the dishwasher.My hubby does absolutely nothing around here except mow the lawn(because I am allergic)and sit on his ass and lets me wait on him ..I am so sick and tired of this .. ..I am fuming mad ..

  I make sure all bills are paid ,maintain all vehicles( I even change the oil myself)take care of bank statement,grocery shopping,take care of animals/fish tank etc... 

  I feel so took for granted ..I just wanna go out and get drunk and sing some karaoke and have some good well deserved time for myself and to heck with them... :tickedoff:

    They are so gonna hear it from me when everyone gets home...I am about to blow my top and may the Lord have mercy on their souls as I sure ain't gonna....

thanks for letting me vent my anger..I know this is prob due to w/d but I really don't care ..they are gonna get a peice of my mind ...at least it will make me feel better....

hope I don't do something that I will regret ...yes I am that upset...

my head is feeling weird again ..my right side hurts again..my pulse is up and b/p is down...

sure that is w/d too... I dunno ...something is really wrong with me today..I am losing it....

can anyone help me get grounded here?

[[Be...]]

   OK...bad day....I feel like I am everyone's slave in this house..I wanna go on fricken strike and just leave em to roll in their own nastiness...I am so fed up today....

 

my head is feeling weird again ..my right side hurts again..my pulse is up and b/p is down...

sure that is w/d too... I dunno ...something is really wrong with me today..I am losing it....

can anyone help me get grounded here?

 

Aw, Nola, that's the pits!    My mom was like you and did everything for us.  When she got cancer and couldn't do all that stuff I found out how tired she was of always being responsible for everything in the house.  You probably are feeling worse because of withdrawal but it sounds like your family does take you for granted.  Maybe you can write up what you will and won't do and get family members to take on some of those responsibilities. I wonder how long they could avoid doing their own laundry if you stopped doing it.  Hmmmm.  It's tough, I know. They are used to "mom will do it" and habits can be hard to break.

 

Is there anything besides getting drunk that you could do to have a good time and reward yourself?  You do deserve fun and happiness but you know that the alcohol would ultimately make w/d worse. 

 

[[...]]

I wish I had some magic words to say that would really help you. I'll try to do my best...

 

First, you are doing fantastic being able to accomplish all that you do. I couldn't have done all that before benzos, much less while tapering.

Second, I can relate to being taken for granted. I used to feel that way a lot when my kids were still at home and felt a lot of anger and resentment because of it.

Third, you mentioned in a previous post that you're able to hide how you're feeling regarding w/d. Do your family members have any idea what's really going on with you? Do you think a family meeting to discuss this would help? Maybe if they knew the truth about your w/d process they would be more willing to pitch in.

Fourth, are you able to spend even a small part of each day practicing relaxation techniques or meditation? This is the best grounding I can think of. Just five minutes of deep breathing can calm the mind and body.

 

I like what Beeper said about rewarding yourself in a positive way - maybe lunch or a night out with a friend?

 

Good luck to you - hope you're feeling better by the time you read this.

 

Lynne 

[[Wi...]]

 

    I appreciate the responses everyone..I just had a family meeting a bit ago and just told em all how I felt..and that it is gonna change or I am checking out..I let em have it and I can say I do feel much better now..Hubby is now outside doing yardwork..to get away from me I assume..He said he has been trying and threw up the fact that he mows the lawn and goes to the garden and I replied by saying but what do you think you do to add to my burden ?

thats when his attitude changed an he said he was sorry.I asked the kids the same thing and they said everything they do adds to my burden...I wrote down chores the other night and put em in a jar and each day they are to draw out 2 of them and do them.whatever it says..

  I have told them what I am going through with w/d and about the feelings I get when I get them..they don't know what to do or say ...so there I am with that...

    there really is nothing I can think of to do to reward myself because money is so tight around here right now..short of drinking my vodka as I have that on hand ..I know that is  not a good thing to do and am trying my best to abstain...my life just sucks..

  I also told em I was tired of being took for granted and I am not their slave ..I am a wife and a mother and I can only do so much here...I am tired of them relying on me for everything..I have no time to relax or do something that I want without being guilty about it for some reason or another ..and drinking and singing is something I really enjoy and playing my guitar..thats what relaxes me the most...short of that I dunno what to do..I ain't supposed to drink because of w/d so I am just clueless here..I thought about going over to a friends house and hanging out with her but she is in the same predicament as I am about being took for granted and she has a houseful of kids over there so I don't think that will be too relaxing for me at all..

I really appreciate the kind words of everyone here..I guess it is my fault for being a pushover and trying to be nice and take care of everyone but I have put me needs on the backburner here and I am starting to feel the effects/resentment for it all... I don't want to be like this..

before I just took my xanax and went on .Those devil pills made me numb to what was going on around me and now that I am w/d I guess the real me and feelings are starting to show..

  I have pity on them because I have met my tolerence on all the stuff happening round here and I am changing ..and in my eyes ..for the better in the long run...I am awakening to the fact that I have been took for granted here and I have to change it before it takes its toll on me any worse than it already has....I cannot continue to w/d and put up with what I have to put up with..I feel so outta control with my life and my family..

  Maybe I can get this under control ...   I sure hope so.... :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

[[Wi...]]

 

  still not stable I guess....arrrrggghhhhh...but after taking pm dose I do feel not so angry.

my head is still  playing tricks with me and so is my vision...I guess I will do like Patty said just take it as it comes and deal with it best I can..

  You buddies are all I have got that understand what I am going through...other than that I am all alone...thank you so very much .I am in debt to you all..

                 

                                                                          Nola

[Guest [st...]]

Hey, Nola,

 

Hang in there.  That agitation is a real bummer.  One of my worst symptoms.  Just remember it is not you but the stupid benzo.

 

Patty  xo

[[Je...]]

Hi!

 

I wish I had the magic cure for making the family understand...but I don't.  I have yelled, screamed, begged, cried, threatened to quit my job, tried guilt, reasoning, everything I can possibly think of...and they still don't help much.  Sooooooooo, my house looks trashed most days...and I have a pile of laundry downstairs that you wouldn't believe...dishes are in my sink and everything will stay that way until I take care of it on the weekend.  I just can't do it during the week.  I am no longer going though benzo withdrawal...but I have a chronic condition that zaps my energy and working full-time is about all I can do during the week.

 

Do what I do.  When the stress of it all becomes too much...I run a nice hot bath..with my favorite bubble bath...grab a good book...and soak.  I just can't do it all...and neither can you in your condition.  It's a hard thing to do...but you just gotta learn to do what you can...and let the rest go.

 

Hang in there!

 

Love,

 

Jen

[[Be...]]

 

     I appreciate the responses everyone..I just had a family meeting a bit ago and just told em all how I felt..and that it is gonna change or I am checking out..I let em have it and I can say I do feel much better now..Hubby is now outside doing yardwork..to get away from me I assume..He said he has been trying and threw up the fact that he mows the lawn and goes to the garden and I replied by saying but what do you think you do to add to my burden ?

thats when his attitude changed an he said he was sorry.I asked the kids the same thing and they said everything they do adds to my burden...I wrote down chores the other night and put em in a jar and each day they are to draw out 2 of them and do them.whatever it says..

  I have told them what I am going through with w/d and about the feelings I get when I get them..they don't know what to do or say ...so there I am with that...

    there really is nothing I can think of to do to reward myself because money is so tight around here right now..short of drinking my vodka as I have that on hand ..I know that is  not a good thing to do and am trying my best to abstain...my life just sucks..

 

I like the sound of that family meeting and the job jar.  It sounds like they got what you were saying but you'll have to reenforce it for a while or everyone will fall back in bad habits.  You stick to your guns and remind them (gently?) as needed. 

  I also told em I was tired of being took for granted and I am not their slave ..I am a wife and a mother and I can only do so much here...I am tired of them relying on me for everything..I have no time to relax or do something that I want without being guilty about it for some reason or another ..and drinking and singing is something I really enjoy and playing my guitar..thats what relaxes me the most...short of that I dunno what to do..I ain't supposed to drink because of w/d so I am just clueless here..I thought about going over to a friends house and hanging out with her but she is in the same predicament as I am about being took for granted and she has a houseful of kids over there so I don't think that will be too relaxing for me at all..

 

Is there a place you can be by yourself and play your guitar?  I have a friend that often retreats to her bedroom, closes the door and plays and sings her heart out.  I wish I knew how to play an instrument.    I tried to learn the piano but had no talent for it. Oh, well.

I really appreciate the kind words of everyone here..I guess it is my fault for being a pushover and trying to be nice and take care of everyone but I have put me needs on the backburner here and I am starting to feel the effects/resentment for it all... I don't want to be like this..

before I just took my xanax and went on .Those devil pills made me numb to what was going on around me and now that I am w/d I guess the real me and feelings are starting to show..

  I have pity on them because I have met my tolerence on all the stuff happening round here and I am changing ..and in my eyes ..for the better in the long run...I am awakening to the fact that I have been took for granted here and I have to change it before it takes its toll on me any worse than it already has....I cannot continue to w/d and put up with what I have to put up with..I feel so outta control with my life and my family..

   Maybe I can get this under control ...   I sure hope so.... :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

 

I think you have hit the nail on the head about waking up. You can deal with this new reality, Nola, and it will get better.  Just know that some of the anger you feel is due to the benzo w/d.  Keep after your family to do their part, esp those kids, and figure out some things you would like to do with all the free time and clear head you will have. 

[[tr...]]

Hi Nola,

 

I'm sure your story rings a bell with many of us...trying to do it all and take care of everyone's problems.  I believe that is what got us on the drugs, in one way or another, in the first place.  Trying to do it all and when we couldn't we were given drugs....

 

I ct'ed off all my drugs just about 11 months ago and I got very, very sick so I had to stop doing everything.  I couldn't remember my name some days but what this has done for me is that as I have gotten better with time I didn't go back to my old ways.  It's been a real shock for my family but I made up my mind and I refuse to do it again.  A lot of things fell through the cracks for months but I wasn't able to take care of them so someone else had to step up to the plate and I've never looked back.  I knew that if I started solving everyone's problems again I would lose myself forever, so regardless of what happened I was not going to go back to the life I had before the ct. 

 

I've been following your story and my advice to you would be to make the changes you need in your life and stick to it.  You will love yourself for it. 

[[Wi...]]

  Hey Beeper.

  you said it right...I gotta keep after em and make em do their part around here...right now I just haven't got the mental strength to keep it all up ...

  I realized that is probably the reason I was put on nerve pills to begin with as I was so overwhelmed by everyones expectations that it literally threw me into panic/anxiety mode...

I dunno .. its a thought..I gotta bunch of them running through my head at the moment...

thanks for being there Beeper.thanks for being a buddy...

                                              Nola

[[Wi...]]

 

  Hey Tropical Soul.

well bless your heart ...you've been following my story huh? messed up ain't it....

I gotta lot of demons to fight with..thats for sure...

  I just got to hang in there and do the right things and not be a pushover..

and you are right ..I will love myself for it one day...Right now I feel like a total B....

 

                            thanks for being a buddie...you guys and gals are all I have got right now..

                                      Nola

[[ba...]]

 

     I appreciate the responses everyone..I just had a family meeting a bit ago and just told em all how I felt..and that it is gonna change or I am checking out..I let em have it and I can say I do feel much better now..Hubby is now outside doing yardwork..to get away from me I assume..He said he has been trying and threw up the fact that he mows the lawn and goes to the garden and I replied by saying but what do you think you do to add to my burden ?

thats when his attitude changed an he said he was sorry.I asked the kids the same thing and they said everything they do adds to my burden...I wrote down chores the other night and put em in a jar and each day they are to draw out 2 of them and do them.whatever it says..

  I have told them what I am going through with w/d and about the feelings I get when I get them..they don't know what to do or say ...so there I am with that...

    there really is nothing I can think of to do to reward myself because money is so tight around here right now..short of drinking my vodka as I have that on hand ..I know that is  not a good thing to do and am trying my best to abstain...my life just sucks..

  I also told em I was tired of being took for granted and I am not their slave ..I am a wife and a mother and I can only do so much here...I am tired of them relying on me for everything..I have no time to relax or do something that I want without being guilty about it for some reason or another ..and drinking and singing is something I really enjoy and playing my guitar..thats what relaxes me the most...short of that I dunno what to do..I ain't supposed to drink because of w/d so I am just clueless here..I thought about going over to a friends house and hanging out with her but she is in the same predicament as I am about being took for granted and she has a houseful of kids over there so I don't think that will be too relaxing for me at all..

I really appreciate the kind words of everyone here..I guess it is my fault for being a pushover and trying to be nice and take care of everyone but I have put me needs on the backburner here and I am starting to feel the effects/resentment for it all... I don't want to be like this..

before I just took my xanax and went on .Those devil pills made me numb to what was going on around me and now that I am w/d I guess the real me and feelings are starting to show..

  I have pity on them because I have met my tolerence on all the stuff happening round here and I am changing ..and in my eyes ..for the better in the long run...I am awakening to the fact that I have been took for granted here and I have to change it before it takes its toll on me any worse than it already has....I cannot continue to w/d and put up with what I have to put up with..I feel so outta control with my life and my family..

   Maybe I can get this under control ...   I sure hope so.... :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

 

Hello Nola,

 

I applaud your courage...YOU orchestrated a family meeting! Acknowledge that you have taken the first step to  taking care of you. You found the strength and courage within to take the risk and your family heard you! You are reclaiming your best self, my friend.

It hurt me to read your words..."I guess it is my fault...". Please do not berate yourself for what you extended to your family and others. I have had to learn something I read a long time ago..."I cannot physically respond to all that my hearts calls me to...". When I neglect this tenet, it takes a huge toll on me and any help/response on my part at that point in time always falls short. I have learned to take a step back...acknowledge my limits and in so doing honor my best self. I have learned to say I care and if need be communicate that someone or something needs attention, but I cannot respond or be helpful in that moment. It is freeing to acknowledge my limits.

 

It is difficult to break out of our comfort zone and learned patterns of rewarding ourselves. I am alongside of you in the financial arena, and have to be creative about rewarding myself. I have learned to appreciate time alone with my furbabies sitting outside, a short walk with a good friend, sitting by the waterfront and listening to the waves. Simple things that I was always too busy to enjoy...or being consumed with resentment regarding my financial situation...as if money could buy happiness...that is an easy thing for me to succumb to. I know it isn't true...but it sure seems like a simple solution to a lot of my burdens. I'm working on that resentment...can't say that I have conquered it.

 

You play the guitar? What a wonderful gift you have...share it with yourself. Take pleasure in your voice and ability to create music. I hear what you are saying about the guitar, singing and drinking. It is difficult to step away from something that has been a way of life for you. One step at a time...be cautious with the temptation of alcohol...it too is a wily adversary often disguised as a friend.

 

Take time tonight to say to yourself...well done, Nola. I know you want to be your best self and share her with your family and friends; I do believe that is underneath all the sh**. As time has passed, you gave so much away, there was nothing left to nurture you. You took a bold step earlier this evening...I am in awe of your courage knowing what you were risking by sharing your most intimate thoughts/feelings. Give yourself a hug and acknowledge that you have begun the journey of reclaiming your best self.

 

hugs, Barb    

[[tr...]]

 

   Hey Tropical Soul.

well bless your heart ...you've been following my story huh? messed up ain't it....

I gotta lot of demons to fight with..thats for sure...

  I just got to hang in there and do the right things and not be a pushover..

and you are right ..I will love myself for it one day...Right now I feel like a total B....

 

                             thanks for being a buddie...you guys and gals are all I have got right now..

                                      Nola

 

 

Well, you know Nola, sometimes being "a total B" is all a girl has to hold on to!    It makes us interesting people.  And if people wouldn't be total AH's we wouldn't have to pull out the "B" card!  It's just the way I feel about it! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[[ba...]]

Nola,

I just posted to you and read what tropical soul wrote...and all this time I thought "BB" stood for

"BE A BI***" 

Just kidding...but it made me laugh to think about BenzoBuddies being shortened to "BB"...and then my mind went trolling. 

Hope this brings a grin your way....

 

hugs, Barb 

[[Wi...]]

 

 

    Hey Barb,

  Yeah  I did get  outta that one..Just didn't wanna say the Bi*** word outright..

don't wanna offend anyone ... ..

some of the abbreviations I still dunno....I'm like

brain farts are what I am having...just plain ole brain farts....

thanks I needed a good laugh....

 

    Hugs back at ya Barb...                           Nola

[[Wi...]]

 

 

          thats so true...I just hate being a B...but every once in a while you got to I guess..

[[Wi...]]

Well today is a new day..

  I am playing hookie from work today (rescheduled for tom) and me and my best friend are

gonna have a day out on the town...We are going out to eat (her treat) and look around some

antique shops and lord knows what all...

  Hoping for a relaxing day ..I really need one...

 

                                                              hugs .. Nola

[[Th...]]

Well today is a new day..

  I am playing hookie from work today (rescheduled for tom) and me and my best friend are

gonna have a day out on the town...We are going out to eat (her treat) and look around some

antique shops and lord knows what all...

  Hoping for a relaxing day ..I really need one...

 

                                                               hugs .. Nola

 

Hi Nola,

 

Glad you are taking a much deserved day off, hope you have a relaxing and fun day!!

 

T2