The Long Hold Support Group

[[Ma...]]

Trishy, I think you will be ok. Just stick with your normal schedule. I think we’ve all done this at one time or another.  :smitten:

 

 

Trishy, I am with Kit, you will be fine, just get back on your schedule.    :smitten:

Love ya TT!!

[[Ma...]]

Mary I changed my profile picture to show you the tree I'm my kitchen but it came out terribly blurry.. I'll keep it up until tomorrow then I'll change it back. It might give you some idea though what I did. This tree is in front of my sliders. I had my blind pulled down bc it was early morning and dark out. I took this picture too show my daughter. I am going to add more to the tree. I went looking for more things this morning but almost all fake fall foliage is bought up 🤷 looks like the stores are into Christmas already.

Love ya,

Trishy ❤️

 

Try Amazon!  It looks so cute.  I love decorations but just once I would like a home without all the extra, but then, hell you see something cute that would look great in that corner and it would be full again.  :laugh:  Have you heard the tax news?    >

[[Tr...]]

Mary I changed my profile picture to show you the tree I'm my kitchen but it came out terribly blurry.. I'll keep it up until tomorrow then I'll change it back. It might give you some idea though what I did. This tree is in front of my sliders. I had my blind pulled down bc it was early morning and dark out. I took this picture too show my daughter. I am going to add more to the tree. I went looking for more things this morning but almost all fake fall foliage is bought up 🤷 looks like the stores are into Christmas already.

Love ya,

Trishy ❤️

 

Try Amazon!  It looks so cute.  I love decorations but just once I would like a home without all the extra, but then, hell you see something cute that would look great in that corner and it would be full again.  :laugh:  Have you heard the tax news?    >

Lololol I know what you mean! I got rid of so much stuff. I don't know if you remember me and Rich cleaning out our basement and garage, I also cleaned closets and got rid of decorations I no longer wanted and what happens?? I go and buy more  :laugh:

Could you make out my kitchen table at all? It's got a huge dough bowl filled with fall foliage and pumpkins. Then there's a black shelf above decorated for fall. There's a hutch on one side of my kitchen table against the wall that's also decorated  :laugh:

I did hear about the tax news and all I can say about that is YAY!! 💃🎊🎉

[[Tr...]]

Mary I changed my profile picture to my dough bowl that's on my kitchen table  it looks smaller in the picture :laugh:

[[Ma...]]

Mary I changed my profile picture to show you the tree I'm my kitchen but it came out terribly blurry.. I'll keep it up until tomorrow then I'll change it back. It might give you some idea though what I did. This tree is in front of my sliders. I had my blind pulled down bc it was early morning and dark out. I took this picture too show my daughter. I am going to add more to the tree. I went looking for more things this morning but almost all fake fall foliage is bought up 🤷 looks like the stores are into Christmas already.

Love ya,

Trishy ❤️

 

That new pic is great.  That's very nice.  The first was alittle blurry.  Good job TT  :laugh:

 

Try Amazon!  It looks so cute.  I love decorations but just once I would like a home without all the extra, but then, hell you see something cute that would look great in that corner and it would be full again.  :laugh:  Have you heard the tax news?    >

Lololol I know what you mean! I got rid of so much stuff. I don't know if you remember me and Rich cleaning out our basement and garage, I also cleaned closets and got rid of decorations I no longer wanted and what happens?? I go and buy more  :laugh:

Could you make out my kitchen table at all? It's got a huge dough bowl filled with fall foliage and pumpkins. Then there's a black shelf above decorated for fall. There's a hutch on one side of my kitchen table against the wall that's also decorated  :laugh:

I did hear about the tax news and all I can say about that is YAY!! 💃🎊🎉

[[tr...]]

Ladies..positive update.

 

So this is month 2 that my period came a bit early - but I really don't care about that.

 

I can honestly say I have not been thrown into an emotionally psychotic wave. Do not feel like I'm back in acute.

 

This is huge!

 

About 3 days ago I had a morning of crying of and on, feeling bluesy, but it was normal pre-period lowness that any woman can get. So I can deal with that.

Now I will say I've been dealing with bad aches/pains for awhile now as a benzo symptom, which does feel more intense today, and the cramps..

But theres always ibuprophen.

 

Just wanted to give you gals who are suffering hope. 

[[ki...]]

Trina, your post came just in time for me. I’m a few days out from starting and I am feeling awful. Hot flashes, sleep is crap, nausea, anxiety. Such a blast. I can’t wait to get this over with.

[[Tr...]]

@Trina I really hope to follow in your tracks soon... I haven’t had a break from the period roller coaster yet. Maybe the next cycle will be better..... Keep hanging on all... I can’t wait to be well enough to get off this site... 

[[tr...]]

Trying: For your sake I want to see you off this site, but I've gotten a little attached to you and some others so I think I'd miss you!

 

Kits: So sorry..I know its no fun. 

[[du...]]

 

 

I can honestly say I have not been thrown into an emotionally psychotic wave. Do not feel like I'm back in acute.

 

I am a few months out and dealing with severe akathisia during ovulation and again a few days before PMS.

It also comes with hopelessness and depression and like you said, feels like I'm in acute  :'(

 

Hearing this gives me hope that it will regulate

 

[[bo...]]

my period came a week early, and I was away for the weekend I had a stressful time and was super sensitive and noticed the muscle pain and nerve pain jumping around first time,  it was  all premenstrual.... I can say I'm scared,    half the month and ovulation is becoming torture  :'(I didn't have the pleasure of motherhood so now its all about  survival with no meaning .. sorry for the drama,  ... going to take an advil , hope you all having a better time

[[Ol...]]

Hi everyone!

Trishy I would not worry at all about the double dose. Just go back to your regular cut dose and you will be fine. Some people even take a little more just when they are cutting as a tactic.

Your tree sounds cute!

I am in Portland, I left for 2 weeks when the smoke was so bad here. We had the worst air quality in the world for a little while there, due to the wildfires. I went up to my friend's lake house in Washington, it was very nice. I'm back now and the air is perfect. Lots of fires still going on in CA though.

 

Just letting you guys know that I am doing fine and I'm thinking of you!

 

[[be...]]

Hi all, I’m new on this board, and I need support and encouragement to hang on during waves set off by hormones. During taper, I’d experience nausea and anxiety for a few days around my “period” but nothing else. That’s in quotes, bc I had a hysterectomy years ago - long before benzos. I have my ovaries and still cycle normally...just don’t actually bleed. I feel a pinch at ovulation, I have pretty obvious PMS, and I can tell when I start by the exhaustion that hits for a day or two.

 

Since stepping off 8 weeks ago, I’ve had the worst time with waves around my period. They’re not just a little nausea and anxiety...they’re debilitating waves full of all the usual suspects. Tinnitus, burning skin, burning mouth/throat, fatigue, nausea, anxiety, despair, and even some dp/dr. I’m in a wave like this now, and I just need to hear that it lets up.

 

It’s amazing to me how well I can feel one moment and how quickly that can come crashing down. I’m on day 4/5 of riding the roller coaster and feeling awful. Thank you for your transparency in posting here, ladies. It’s helping me so much to look back over your posts.

[[Ma...]]

Hi everyone!

Trishy I would not worry at all about the double dose. Just go back to your regular cut dose and you will be fine. Some people even take a little more just when they are cutting as a tactic.

Your tree sounds cute!

I am in Portland, I left for 2 weeks when the smoke was so bad here. We had the worst air quality in the world for a little while there, due to the wildfires. I went up to my friend's lake house in Washington, it was very nice. I'm back now and the air is perfect. Lots of fires still going on in CA though.

 

Just letting you guys know that I am doing fine and I'm thinking of you!

.

 

Hey OK, I am so glad you checked in, I had been thinking about you.  I knew you had gone to Portland, glad you had a friend away from all that.  Hope you are feeling good.  Miss you 🙋🏼🙋🏼🙋🏼

[[Tr...]]

Hi everyone!

Trishy I would not worry at all about the double dose. Just go back to your regular cut dose and you will be fine. Some people even take a little more just when they are cutting as a tactic.

Your tree sounds cute!

I am in Portland, I left for 2 weeks when the smoke was so bad here. We had the worst air quality in the world for a little while there, due to the wildfires. I went up to my friend's lake house in Washington, it was very nice. I'm back now and the air is perfect. Lots of fires still going on in CA though.

 

Just letting you guys know that I am doing fine and I'm thinking of you!

Hey Olive! So great to hear from you girl! Those fires are something else, oh man so glad you got away from that horrible air quality! That smoke traveled to the east coast! There was one day that we had a slight haze from it!

Crazy times my friend..

I'm back to cut dose tonight. I really have to pay better attention to what I'm doing with my damn pills 

Stay safe woman,

Trishy ❤️

 

[[tr...]]

duke, bonty and beauty:  I really do feel your pain. The past 6 months have been torture near/on my period. Really felt like acute each time ( I think two months ago I experienced a "better" period, but it hasn't been as good as it is now till now. I'm not kidding when I say I felt psychotic.

 

Understand I am feeling cautiously optimistic, holding my breath a bit to see what happens next month. If it happens two months in a row then I'll bake a cake and get balloons.  

[[Tr...]]

@Trina, let us know so we can bake a cake too!! I haven’t had cake in over a year, I’m ready!

[[St...]]

Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Morning Olive always good to see a post from you.How is your back?Is it any easier?How is your mum is she able to stay in her home?l am so glad you were able to get away from the fires etc .How are you settling into Portland?l hope everything is going smoothly for you honey.love you X

Morning Trish have to say l would imagine we have all done that from time to time not a big deal just try not to do it too often.What were the kids fighting about now?I think it's long overdue you tell them to leave you out of it.I would never have involved my mother in an argument mainly because she would have taken my husband's side 😵.I know old habits die hard honey but it is for your own mental health l think you need to be firm.They will learn.I hope you are doing ok with the cut?All the same this end will be back next week sometime.Love you my lST X

Morning LWT, Troch Val Final Bill Miyu NJ Nova Esperanza Intend Gilly Valley Free Lady Mary GP, Suzy Jasmine Ginger Meems Kit and everyone here sending you my love.X

[[Tr...]]

Morning folks,

 

Hope you're all doing a bit better today!

 

I got hit by the flu or a very bad cold last week.  No fun. I'll spare you the details, but feeling awful.

So no more biking and walking right now. Sometimes I can barely stand on my feet.

Hope I'll recover soon.

 

Wishing you all the power to get through the struggle!

 

Stay safe and strong.

 

Trochsetter

[[su...]]

Ladies, I am glad to have found this board, yet so sorry that it has to exist.  Started my first cycle after a rapid taper and very short use, and I think it has set me in a wave. I was in bad shape from interdose withdrawals and acute during the beginning of my rapid taper so no telling what my cycles were like then, but I’ve been decently stable the last month and since my jump.  However, things ramped up this past week beginning with the insomnia again  :'(  The intensity of my symptoms is similar to when I cut too fast, and for a few days before my period began yesterday I had intense crying jags, feeling that hopeless desperation and depression again.  Also had some anger swings I haven’t experienced so intensely ever before.  The irony of this hormonal triggering is that I truly believe it was hormones that led to my original anxiety and palps/BP/racing heart issue that my Dr wanted me to try the benzo for in the first place.  UGH! 

 

I’m 44 and had a mother nature’s sense of humor surprise little bundle of joy (aka unplanned baby) a couple years ago whom I ended up nursing until this June, right before the benzo mess began.  I was also having irregular periods along with dealing with 2 ovarian cysts and a fibroid.  Perimenopause hormonal fluctuations were clearly on full display.  Wondering if any others are also in this stage of life flux?  It’s bad enough as it is for any woman, but the extreme swings of hormones during perimenopause surely cannot be helpful to healing from bwd? 

 

From what I’ve briefly read on the thread so far, the acute return of symptoms is a thing during this time of the month, so at least I can commiserate with others.  And I am thankful to read some hopeful posts here too!

 

Best,

 

Amanda

 

(Beautyfromashes, glad to see a familiar face but so sorry to hear you are in a similar boat after your jump!  This really stinks).

 

[[ki...]]

Sunshine, I’m not in the same boat yet  at 35, but your bundle of joy gives me a lot of hope for another baby after this mess is over. I also had to stop nursing my son when I started Benzos. I think Trina is around the same age. I’m glad you found us (and not glad that you needed to find us). ❤️

[[tr...]]

Glad you think I'm younger, but I turn 45 soon....perimenopause is just hanging out in my yard waiting to strike lol

 

Today some physical symptoms did kick up a bit, but still better by far in comparison.

[[be...]]

Hi Sunshine! Glad/sad to see you here too. I’ve been doing really well off the lorazepam, but now that some time has passed, I see the ever-suspicious monthly pattern to the waves emerging. The last couple of days have been especially brutal.

 

I turned 40 this summer, and I can definitely tell things have changed quite a bit since my mid-30s.  I’m not quiet to perimenopause, but I’m definitely something. Lol.

 

Trina, look at you giving us all hope! Keep us posted.

 

Looking forward to this hormonal wave situation settling down for all of us.

 

Elizabeth

[[Ol...]]

Thanks Mary, Trishy, so good to hear back from you!

Stut, thanks for the inquiries! Unfortunately my back is as bad as ever. It hurts all the time!  :'( :'( I got a referral to see a physical therapist but I can't see them until 10/15. So now this back pain has been going on 9 months. Well, if nothing else, benzo withdrawal has taught us all patience.. My mom is doing well, she is still at the house in Santa Cruz. She loves it there, and she is a very capable 80 year old! She still chops the firewood and is way more social than me! Portland is good, I have been getting out to see friends and go on walks whenever I can. I even started biking again, so happy about that. Getting my life back is slow going, but going none the less. pandemic be damned! Of course taking all the covid precautions. Love you!

 

Troch I'm sorry to hear that you are sick. You don't deserve that, just when you are staring to feel better! Well hopefully it will pass soon and we will hear about your bike rides again soon.

 

Love to all of you.

[[su...]]

Sunshine, I’m not in the same boat yet  at 35, but your bundle of joy gives me a lot of hope for another baby after this mess is over. I also had to stop nursing my son when I started Benzos. I think Trina is around the same age. I’m glad you found us (and not glad that you needed to find us). ❤️

 

kitsune,

 

Thank you so much for the welcome.  I can assure you there is hope for another baby!  We have an older child (she was an oops too), and we really thought she would be the only one as were actively trying when I was 35 right after I had finished grad school, but it just wasn't happening.  5 years we tried, even went through all the fertility testing (I was about to begin the fertility treatments), but after a couple miscarriages and once I hit 40, I said enough as the stress and emotional ride was too much.  We ended up moving again (my husband is active duty military), and we made peace about not having any more kids, then a few months later, BOOM, I was pregnant, and it stuck.  We couldn't believe it!  So now I have a 15 year old and a 2 (soon to be 3) year old, both girls.  I used to say that having a baby after 40 isn't for the faint of heart, but now having gone through benzo withdrawal, having baby after 40 is a cake-walk.  So on that front, I wish you nothing but positivity and hope that it will indeed happen for you. 

 

As for what brings us to this place, this unfortunate shared commonality, I also have hope that we will find our equilibrium and peace again.  Until then, I'm holding on for dear life.  Just wish the hormones wouldn't be so brutal in the process! 

 

Best,

 

Amanda