12-24 months and up support group

[[Li...]]

Hello to all my benzo buddy's,

 

Lisa,

So great you were able to get out for a few days. Sounds like you definitely turned that corner.

 

Thank you so much for all the encouraging words. Something I definitely need to hear and I don't mind hearing it repeated.

 

Helen.

Sounds lovely your husband and you were able to get out. Happy to hear that you are feeling so much better.  I'm looking forward to that day.

 

LadyDen,

Sounds like you're turning a corner as well with the symptoms improving. That's wonderful maybe once you pass this marker things are going to really look up for you.

 

Pashu,

I'm sorry to hear you're having head symptoms but it's a great thing you're able to get out and go to work. I'm sure it's a well needed distraction.

 

Sending warm love and healing hugs to everyone,

 

LiveLife

[[le...]]

Hope you are all doing OK. I’m not too bad, wave seems be easing a bit. Glad queens funeral over with, did dip into bits of it, been on hour upon hour here, and being replaying it endlessly all night, even though everyone been at home as it’s a public holiday, so been a Netflix evening tonight. Still feel bit jittery and on edge, think it’s all crazy behaviour by seemingly “normal” people over here messing with my head.Hopefully normality will return over here tomorrow wooh wooh 😊😀👍

[[Gr...]]

This is the group I desperately needed. I hit a set back about 7 months ago I'd say, since then it's just been none stop symptoms daily. Very over whelming and worse, alot of my old symptoms came back and hit harder but this time around they seem to be morphing and branching out.

 

Like for the first 7 months before this set back hit, I felt like my symptoms would get on the edge before jumping into something much worse, but they never fully stepped over that edge. This time however... My symptoms stepped over that imaginary edge, came back around for seconds and worse,I can't find anyone with my symptoms. Everyone has the basics of symptoms which make me very jealous, alone and has me questioning if this is benzo related.

 

Here are my symptoms

1) Head Preasure and weird sensations: I get pressure on the top of my head like a light squeezing. It's the weird sensations that bother me. They can range from feeling like my head is super heavy, being weighed down, being pulled downwards or side to side, falling within my own head, lightheadedness, a cold blanket over my brain or like a sand paper over my brain. If things get really bad it can feel like my brain is being separated from reality. (Not DP/DR)

 

2) Limb weakness: Like my brain, it's never just one symptom it can be multiple feelings at a time. It's always my left arm and leg (I got checked out for a seizure and stroke). I'm cleared. It's mostly my left arm, my bicep area and hand... My arm and hand feel so weak, heaviness like there's now resistance whenever I try opening my hand... All the way to feeling like my arm is being pulled downwards.

 

3),Visual issues: someone told me I sound like I'm having auras... I don't enough about them to speak on them. But I'm seeing yellow spots, if I look at the ground it looks distorted and weird, Visual snow sometimes, my eyes pyshcially feel weird, dim vison, when I blink I'm having quick after images, if I close my eyes to go to sleep in seeing aggressive light patterns which is crazy and I'm seeing flashes.

 

4) Full body weakness: If things get bad I have to stay in bed. My legs shake because they can't hold me, my neck feels so weak.

 

5) Food sensitivity:this one is getting to me alot and it's making it so I'm scared to eat or drink because I know I'll rev up symptoms. People can generally find one thing they can tolerate, I can't even tolerate water

 

6) extreme restlessness in my body, mostly legs... It's not Akathisia ive had that before. This is different and really crappy

Like I can lay still but my lord I feel so uncomfortable.

 

7) hyper sensory overlord... I don't really know the proper name for this. But it feels like I feel things at a 20/10. This one is new, my vision is hyper focused as in if you've ever looked at object without blinking you go into this hyper focused state, only once it hits I can't turn it off. Loud noises are starting to get to me, never had that before. Have to listen to music on low and anything can send me in anxiety I feel like I'm losing my damn mind. I also have weird bodily sensation if I even. I sleep with a fan and sometimes the air flow makes my body feel so uncomfortable and unstable its so crazy ontop of my anxiety kicking in now.

 

my cognition is just not there anymore. I'm forgetting things like sentences I was just about to write, I lose train of thoughts easily

 

9) I don't know if this is a symptom but I'm havung extreme mental distresses. I feel over whelmed and beaten down. I keep thinking that this will never end how can it or what if this isn't benzos?

 

I can handle 4 things going in at once but there's 9 symptoms which either gang up on me at any moment or they cycle daily.

Just feeling very broken and tired of being broken. I keep thinking there's a horrible condition I don't know about..

 

You asked for symptoms that I use to have which are gone. To be honest I'm pretty scared and I'm not mentally there yet to name any... There isn't enough wood to knock on to make me feel safe as in the past I would think about a symptom and it would show up. Maybe if I get a success story I'll post them. Just know that during this horrific experience I've had 146, but again those were mild... These are making me feel like I'm losing my mind.

 

Most of my symptoms really hit home when I'm laying down, it's always been that way.

 

[[La...]]

Happy 27 months to me!

 

Good morning everyone. As usual I’m celebrating my turn another month in a rough wave that started last night. Oh man I was so hoping to skip this turn a month. But nope! Oh well I’m laying down resting. Even though I’m going through this, I’m happy to have another month under my belt. As Live said this has to break soon. It’s crazy how this goes. Yesterday I was walking around feeling decent to medium most of the day. You know those days that it’s bearable enough to push through? I hope everyone had a good night sleep and have a great day. I’m thinking of you all with much love and happy healing wishes.

 

:smitten:

[[La...]]

Hello to all my benzo buddy's,

 

Lisa,

So great you were able to get out for a few days. Sounds like you definitely turned that corner.

 

Thank you so much for all the encouraging words. Something I definitely need to hear and I don't mind hearing it repeated.

 

Helen.

Sounds lovely your husband and you were able to get out. Happy to hear that you are feeling so much better.  I'm looking forward to that day.

 

LadyDen,

Sounds like you're turning a corner as well with the symptoms improving. That's wonderful maybe once you pass this marker things are going to really look up for you.

 

Pashu,

I'm sorry to hear you're having head symptoms but it's a great thing you're able to get out and go to work. I'm sure it's a well needed distraction.

 

Sending warm love and healing hugs to everyone,

 

LiveLife

Thank you sweetheart! I wish the same for you. ❤️💗❤️💗🌹

[[La...]]

Hope you are all doing OK. I’m not too bad, wave seems be easing a bit. Glad queens funeral over with, did dip into bits of it, been on hour upon hour here, and being replaying it endlessly all night, even though everyone been at home as it’s a public holiday, so been a Netflix evening tonight. Still feel bit jittery and on edge, think it’s all crazy behaviour by seemingly “normal” people over here messing with my head.Hopefully normality will return over here tomorrow wooh wooh 😊😀👍

Glad your wave is easing up. Yes you’ll be glad to see everything back to normal today. The Queen’s funeral was nice. She will be greatly missed and loved. Stay positive dear.    🌹

[[He...]]

Happy 27 months to me!

 

Good morning everyone. As usual I’m celebrating my turn another month in a rough wave that started last night. Oh man I was so hoping to skip this turn a month. But nope! Oh well I’m laying down resting. Even though I’m going through this, I’m happy to have another month under my belt. As Live said this has to break soon. It’s crazy how this goes. Yesterday I was walking around feeling decent to medium most of the day. You know those days that it’s bearable enough to push through? I hope everyone had a good night sleep and have a great day. I’m thinking of you all with much love and happy healing wishes.

 

:smitten:

 

Lady Den,

 

I'm so very sorry you are waving on your 27 month day.  I'm glad yesterday was tolerable but wish it had extended into today.  Big hugs to you. 

 

Helen

[[La...]]

Welcome Grey! Very happy to have you join us. The symptoms you mentioned are not unique to you. Many BBs have those symptoms you mentioned. I’ve had some of them and some I still have. It’s normal for you to think that you’re the only one. There have been times when I thought a certain symptoms were gone just to have them circle back. Sometimes it circles back more intense. It does make us think we are worse because it feels worse. It makes us think we won’t heal. It just doesn’t make any sense because you would think once something leaves then it’s gone for good. But the good news is that eventually it will be gone for good when it’s finished it’s cycles. This is a strange wild crazy up and down roller coaster of a process. But it is just the way it heals. Yes it feels like crap! But there will be a time coming when they’ll get milder until you’re healed. It sucks that it takes so long. I have the visual disturbances you described. Mine are like the old time floor model tv that is fuzzy- remember how people had to slap them on the top or the side to get it to focus again?  My vision also will carry on with what I looked at for awhile after I’m not looking at it anymore. Especially if it’s a light I just turned off or if I looked at my blinds that are closed. The lines on the blinds will remain in everything I look at for awhile afterwards then gradually clear up. Also random spots/ specks, blurry vision and floaters - as well as tired eyes, dry eyes and burning eyes every now and then especially in my morning dread.

I had the food sensitive/ food fears. To test my fears, I ate the same meal for a week to see if it was truly causing me revved up. Then ate a different meal for a week. The end result was MOST of the foods I thought was the culprit wasn’t. What happened is that I got a wave coincidentally after eating something and blamed the food. When I looked at my testing I had only 3 foods that did rev me up and they made sense why. Bananas, broccoli and canned tuna. I did become sensitive to fortified cereals because of all the added vitamins. Boy do I miss my Captain Crunch Berries!  Too much magnesium and canned tuna had too much mercury as well as most use a broth to keep the fish moist. That broth apparently has MSG/ preservatives. I eat really clean to avoid MSG, soy, nitrates/ nitrites and preservatives that are not natural. The body needs a balanced diet to heal. I did get tired of eating the same things but it is what it is until I could reintroduce more foods.Also what helped in eating very few bites every hour. It adds up during the day. Salads are always are good way to eat without being revved up. Just be careful of the dressing. Salads can be made with grilled chicken, eggs, turkey, ham, etc to get protein. The leafy greens are excellent for digestion, folate and variety of important nutrients. I’d make a large bowl and eat some with grilled chicken and a few crackers throughout the day. Soup is also a great go to but I’d suggest it be homemade to avoid MSG. Smoothies are good as well as …..baby food! I ate baby food when I couldn’t eat a meal. They’re natural and has a good variety. Half a jar wait 30 minutes then eat the other half. Baby food is just foods blended down for babies to swallow easily. My point is to encourage you to not let your food fears cause you to become deficient in certain vitamins. Getting morning sunlight about 15-20 minutes every other day is ideal to bring your vitamin D up naturally.

With time as your body returns to homeostasis and you start being able to handle things again then you’ll feel much better. Time will be the healer in this. We all just do our best to get through each day as we support each other. I’m sure other buddies will chime in too.

Hugs 🤗

[[La...]]

Happy 27 months to me!

 

Good morning everyone. As usual I’m celebrating my turn another month in a rough wave that started last night. Oh man I was so hoping to skip this turn a month. But nope! Oh well I’m laying down resting. Even though I’m going through this, I’m happy to have another month under my belt. As Live said this has to break soon. It’s crazy how this goes. Yesterday I was walking around feeling decent to medium most of the day. You know those days that it’s bearable enough to push through? I hope everyone had a good night sleep and have a great day. I’m thinking of you all with much love and happy healing wishes.

 

:smitten:

 

Lady Den,

 

I'm so very sorry you are waving on your 27 month day.  I'm glad yesterday was tolerable but wish it had extended into today.  Big hugs to you. 

 

Helen

Thank you my dear lovely twin! Yes ma’am it’s rough today. Have you seen the window fairy?

 

Love and hugs 🤗

[[Li...]]

Congratulations on 27 months LadyDen!

 

I'm glad yesterday was pretty good for you but I'm sorry you're back in a wave today hopefully it won't last.

 

Big hugs,

 

LiveLife

[[...]]

Happy 27 months, LadyDen!🥰👍

[[le...]]

Happy 27 months to me!

 

Good morning everyone. As usual I’m celebrating my turn another month in a rough wave that started last night. Oh man I was so hoping to skip this turn a month. But nope! Oh well I’m laying down resting. Even though I’m going through this, I’m happy to have another month under my belt. As Live said this has to break soon. It’s crazy how this goes. Yesterday I was walking around feeling decent to medium most of the day. You know those days that it’s bearable enough to push through? I hope everyone had a good night sleep and have a great day. I’m thinking of you all with much love and happy healing wishes.

 

:smitten:

 

 

 

 

Sorry you are in a wave. I’m coming up to 27 months off AD’s. So frustrating my son & wife came to stay at weekend, managed go out fir meal as was husbands birthday. Then went to garden centre with them on Sunday, almost felt half normal. But back to jittery normal today, I just seem to be stuck unable move forward. Get brief respite but never lasts very long. Least things more normal here, funeral only got brief mention on news thank goodness, and everyone on TV not wearing black anymore yeah😊😊😊

[[de...]]

LadyDen:    Yea!  Yea!!!  27 months!!!  Let's celebrate!    You are getting there.  I know you don't feel great today, but one day you will feel like your self again!!! 

 

So grateful for you and your positivity.  You make this journey a little more bearable!

 

I hope your evening is better and gives you a little glimmer of what you are going to be like when you are completely healed.

 

Lisa

[[La...]]

Morning hugs Yearlings! Thank you, Live, Sandy, Leann and Lisa for the well wishes/ congrats. ALL day yesterday was awful. I started intense sound sensitivity to bass, booming sounds and equipment such as lawn things. It revved up anxiety immediately when I heard it. Wow it was terrible! I haven’t had this since acute days. Hopefully it won’t last very long. I’m also cycling rapidly symptoms with frequent waves. This wasn’t a nice happy 27 gift at all. I guess it’s part of the process. I’m praying that this is my last blast of this crap show.

I hope all of you are feeling better and embracing your healing. It would be awesome for all of us to heal at the same time and flood the success story thread. Wow what a beautiful thought!

Sending my love and window wishes ❤️🌹

 

Ohhhh….if any of you have any idea of the best noise canceling earplugs please let me know. Thanks!

[[de...]]

LadyDen:  So sorry you got slammed yesterday!  What a bummer!  Just a constant reminder that we are still healing!  None of it makes sense, but we have to trust we are on the right path, and one day this will be over!!!!

 

Sending lots of love your way today!!!!

 

Lisa

[[He...]]

Lady Den,

 

I'm so sorry yesterday was gruesome.  I hope today was much better. 

 

Greyzone,

 

This is just a short response for now (I'm tired so can't say more) but I have had or have every symptom you listed and more. Some of mine were just crazy over the years while in tolerance withdrawal.  I hope you get some relief soon. 

 

Decatur, Leann, LiveLife, GG, J Ben et al, thinking of you and hoping improvements are coming through. 

 

Since recovering from my bad cold and the ensuing brutal wave that was inevitable, I'm feeling like the last 3 days are a nice, steady climb back to where I was before I got sick.  I need to help my husband right now who has a pretty severe problem with his neck and really thankful I can do that! I've had some decent days and it's nice to be on the giving end of care.

 

 

[[Be...]]

LadyDen, I know all about the sound sensitivity.  You can buy over the ear earmuffs at Lowe's or Home Depot or possibly even Walmart or another hardware store.  I got a pair at Home Depot, I believe, a few years ago.  Many of them have high decibel ratings too.  That's what I use when I take my nap on the sofa in the evening.

[[Li...]]

LadyDen,

I'm sorry to hear about your sound sensitivity. I know what that's like. Hopefully like you said, it's going to pass soon just another part of the fine tuning that needs to take place. I love your thought about us all healing at the same time and flooding the success stories. I'm on board for that!

 

Helen,

So happy to hear you're improving. Sure wish I could follow in your footsteps.  It's wonderful you're able to help your husband. My husband has been so very supportive and positive for me. I wish I could return the favor to him.

 

Sending warm love and hailing hugs to all,

 

LiveLife

[[La...]]

LadyDen, I know all about the sound sensitivity.  You can buy over the ear earmuffs at Lowe's or Home Depot or possibly even Walmart or another hardware store.  I got a pair at Home Depot, I believe, a few years ago.  Many of them have high decibel ratings too.  That's what I use when I take my nap on the sofa in the evening.

Thank you Becks. I’ll look into that. The earplugs I have now are 28 decibels. I know I need higher ones. Hope you enjoy your day today and feeling better too. Hugs 🤗

[[La...]]

LadyDen:  So sorry you got slammed yesterday!  What a bummer!  Just a constant reminder that we are still healing!  None of it makes sense, but we have to trust we are on the right path, and one day this will be over!!!!

 

Sending lots of love your way today!!!!

 

Lisa

Sending you lots of love too! How are you doing?

Yesterday was better. And today feels about the same. So I’m grateful. And no….none of this makes sense to get a big slam out of the blue like that. Makes it hard for us recovering to plan anything. And yes I trust that this is the way the process goes and one of these days soon this will be over. The sooner the better IMO. Enjoy your lovely self today deary. ❤️🤗🌹

[[La...]]

Lady Den,

 

I'm so sorry yesterday was gruesome.  I hope today was much better. 

 

Greyzone,

 

This is just a short response for now (I'm tired so can't say more) but I have had or have every symptom you listed and more. Some of mine were just crazy over the years while in tolerance withdrawal.  I hope you get some relief soon. 

 

Decatur, Leann, LiveLife, GG, J Ben et al, thinking of you and hoping improvements are coming through. 

 

Since recovering from my bad cold and the ensuing brutal wave that was inevitable, I'm feeling like the last 3 days are a nice, steady climb back to where I was before I got sick.  I need to help my husband right now who has a pretty severe problem with his neck and really thankful I can do that! I've had some decent days and it's nice to be on the giving end of care.

Yesterday was better Thank God Almighty! Today seems about the same so far. Thank you for your love. I pray that you remain going in the right direction as far as feeling well. How’s your hubby?

Love hugs to you dear friend 🌹🤗❤️

[[La...]]

LadyDen,

I'm sorry to hear about your sound sensitivity. I know what that's like. Hopefully like you said, it's going to pass soon just another part of the fine tuning that needs to take place. I love your thought about us all healing at the same time and flooding the success stories. I'm on board for that!

 

Helen,

So happy to hear you're improving. Sure wish I could follow in your footsteps.  It's wonderful you're able to help your husband. My husband has been so very supportive and positive for me. I wish I could return the favor to him.

 

Sending warm love and hailing hugs to all,

 

LiveLife

Live darling are you any better? I pray you are at least getting some windows? Thank you for being such a sweet friend. And yes I’m praying we flood that success board together! I’m going to hold on to that thought.

Sending you love ❤️🤗🌹

[[La...]]

Happy 27 months to me!

 

Good morning everyone. As usual I’m celebrating my turn another month in a rough wave that started last night. Oh man I was so hoping to skip this turn a month. But nope! Oh well I’m laying down resting. Even though I’m going through this, I’m happy to have another month under my belt. As Live said this has to break soon. It’s crazy how this goes. Yesterday I was walking around feeling decent to medium most of the day. You know those days that it’s bearable enough to push through? I hope everyone had a good night sleep and have a great day. I’m thinking of you all with much love and happy healing wishes.

 

:smitten:

 

 

 

 

Sorry you are in a wave. I’m coming up to 27 months off AD’s. So frustrating my son & wife came to stay at weekend, managed go out fir meal as was husbands birthday. Then went to garden centre with them on Sunday, almost felt half normal. But back to jittery normal today, I just seem to be stuck unable move forward. Get brief respite but never lasts very long. Least things more normal here, funeral only got brief mention on news thank goodness, and everyone on TV not wearing black anymore yeah😊😊😊

Big hugs to you Leann. Thank you for being so sweet. Your meal with your family sounded so awesome. I’m glad you’re able to enjoy their company. I also enjoy when my son and his kids come over to see me….every so often. I enjoy them as much as I can. Then I retreat to bed. They understand why. When the kids get too rowdy then they leave. I’m soooooo grateful they do that because I don’t want to “ kick” them out. I also get revved up a little while after they’re gone. It’s normal for us recovering. I want to wish you a congrats on your upcoming 27 months! Wooohooo! You’re making good gains now Leann. I know your other symptoms mask what’s going on underneath but I see it! Did you stop the unisom?

Enjoy your day today. Love you bunches! 🌹🤗❤️

[[He...]]

Lady Den and LiveLife,

 

Thank you both for your concern.  My husband had less pain this morning and actually slept last night so hopefully things are beginning to get back in place with his neck. He has stenosis in the cervical column of his neck and clearly something got knocked in a wrong position this week. He'll keep his orthopedist appt for early October and will baby it until then but he was able to drive to work this morning for an important meeting. PHEW!!  Live, I really hope you can get to feeling some relief soon. I'm keeping you close in my thoughts.  Lady Den, I'm so glad you got outside yesterday. I'll be getting out for some short walks today and will be taking you with me in my mind and heart.  My neighbors invited me over for a very small gathering this evening to toast a friend's birthday so I'm looking forward to seeing friends.

 

Helen

 

[[La...]]

Helen thanks. I’m glad your hubby was able to drive. I’m sure they’ll get him sorted out soon. He’s blessed to have a caring wife like you.

Please enjoy your outing with your neighbors. Sounds like a blast. And yes take me with you on your walk. I’m going to try today and see how it goes. I’ll be thinking of you too.