Hi (Clonazepam buddie)

[[Sa...]]

I did try liquid.  I was so excited and got all my equipment....then about a day or two after I felt like I went into a cold turkey.  I realized I was swallowing the liquid whereas before I directly took the pill sublingually.  So, the med goes directly to my brain and if I switch it up, I go into pretty severe withdrawals.  Welchie I’m still so interested to see if that book has insight into sublingual pills. I can’t change it now as it’s been working well throughout my taper but I still would like to know opinions on it.  Anyway, I had to quickly go back to a dry taper because the liquid was absorbed totally differently.  I’m back home now, competition went great, Pete I drove past Liz Feliz on the way home.  Hoping you are all in a souuuunf sleep as it’s 3 am for you crazy east coasters. 💖💖💖

[[We...]]

Saige...I can't for the life of me find the passage about sublingual.  Maybe you can do the liquid sublingually???  Glad you survived the competition and it went well.

 

We're getting a little dusting of snow out here (which in New England means anything under a foot of snow, right Pete?). 

 

I just cracked a book called Nutrient Power - Heal Your Biochemistry and Heal Your Brain by William Walsh.  It's technical, but interesting about nutrient deficiencies and neurotransmitters.  Mentions the total failure of psych drugs (mentions benzos specifically..and SSRI's and such) and how nutrients can heal.

 

Also says elevated nutrients can cause problems too, which would explain why some react to certain vites.  I'll keep you guys posted if there's any worthwhile info and it's worth buying.

[[Sa...]]

Ohhh that sounds like a really interesting book.  Yes please let us know what you find. 

[[We...]]

I think you would find the book interesting and it may be worth the 15$ or so.  He gets way too technical in the early part of the book, but there's some gems to be gleaned.  It deals with more serious chemical imbalances re the psychiatric population, but, you know, we're a little chemically whacked right now.

 

I found it interesting mainly because there is no one size fits all nutrition for brain chemicals which rings true and explains why some things work and some thing don't for certain people.  And he pretty clearly breaks that down according to sx type.  Also says problems can arise from too much of one supplement.

 

Another interesting part of his approach...he'll list other, seemingly unrelated things to look for so you can get a grasp on which supplements would be a better choice for which category you may fit into.  It's too much to explain here...

 

Don't know if you are familiar with GreenCup...she's one of the moderators on this site...and she started a thread about SAMe and I'll be darned, it was in this book.  Anyway...don't want to bore you with too many details, except to say, I think it's worth checking into.  Thought I'd pass it along.

 

Hope you two are having an ok day...

[[So...]]

Hi Welchie and Saige

 

The book sounds very interesting - I want to read it. I do know Green Cup - she is great. The world of other supplements and other meds overwhelms me. That said, I am thinking of trying a low does of Trazadone to help sleep. Last night I was up at 3:30am and did not go back to sleep and I can't continue like this. Of course I have searched everywhere about Trazadone and Remeron and there is good and bad, like everything. If it doesn't work, I will stop. I just need something to sleep. This struggle gets pretty hard sometimes and leaves me feeling defeated and sad honestly.

 

Luckily today hasn't been awful - no horrible s/x despite the no sleep.

 

In non-benzo news, I have been watching I Am The Night - about the Black Dahlia murder - it's good!

 

How are you both doing today? I hope well!

 

I wish I could see the above posts when I respond as I always forget stuff.

 

How are the dance superstars Saige?

 

Pete 

[[So...]]

Oh yes Saige - the liquid. I am still titrating 1mg with liquid and also wonder if it is working. No spike in s/x so it must be OK. I do know that when I tried all liquid the first day, it did not go that well. I hope I am getting used to it. I often wonder how it is getting into my body with the syringe. I try and put it under my tongue...who knows.

 

I used to take 1mg of V at night and 1mg during the afternoon but tonight doing all 2mg before bed, hoping that helps with sleep...

[[Sa...]]

Ugh so sorry you are not able to sleep. We’re home, dance went great.  I feel so much better since I got back to my oolong tea.  It’s l theanine again but very small amounts.  I am thankfully feeling great today except for the black eye I got from my 8 year old...total accident.  Just trying to get through laundry now. Pete, are you sure watching murder movies is good before sleep 🤣. I can only watch rainbows and unicorns after 5 pm

[[So...]]

A black eye! Ouch!

 

The tea sounds lovely. Yes - I should watch something with rainbows and unicorns tonight...and read!

 

Making dinner - will check back soon

[[We...]]

I feel for you two with the sleep issues.  For awhile there I was trying sleep aids too and they only seemed to make it worse.  It actually improved when I decided to say phuque it and let mother nature take her course.  And then it sort of straightened itself out some.  I sometimes think my worrying about sleep made it worse.

 

Saige - hope your black eye doesn't hurt    So does the kid pack a good punch or what?  Just kidding.  I know it was an accident.

 

Pete - what's for din din?  Now come on and fess up - you're a really good cook, right? 

 

Another day done on the freedom trail....

 

 

[[So...]]

Welchie - love the spelling of phuque - gonna steal that.

 

I made mustard chicken and spinach - boring but w/d friendly. I actually taught myself to cook 2 summers ago. Before that I barely made toast. Now I cook and I am pretty good - I love doing it  -especially grilling in the summer - grills are my favorite. I am 44 now so imagine learning to cook at 42! Took me a while.

 

How's your night?

 

Saige - how is dat shiner? Kids can wallop for sure! Especially a dancing queen!

[[Sa...]]

Haha she does pack a punch. She felt so bad, she was raising her arm with a large remote control and it literally flew out of her hand and nailed me in the face. What’s crazy, and I meant to mention this before, I had this bloodshot eye (looked like a broken blood vessel) that hit when my withdrawals started.  I was surprised to learn this too was a common symptom. It wasn’t painful but cosmetically very annoying.it finally has been going away and then I get hit in the other eye.  Ugghhh! So, sleep has actually been good for me with the nekatonin(tiny pieces throughout the night) I couldn’t sleep without it, and lately also without positive calming voice in my ear.  But when I’m home and have my schedule it’s been good.  I don’t cook you guys! I’m the worst wife.  I’m 46 and don’t cook Pete so I beat you haha.  I lowered again tonight because I’ve been feeling good.  Welchie I do understand about letting nature just work too.  I do think a lot of the supplements do help but may prolong healing because the are a crutch to gaba and gaba needs to feel some stress so it signals to increase balanced production.  I know you are truly healing as you are off most everything and time moves on!  Well it’s about 2 am there so hoping you guys don’t see this for many hours!  Sleep well💖💖💖

[[So...]]

Hi Saige and Welchie -

 

Hope your eye improves. My eyes are always red it seems as I taper so have to use eye drops before I go out or I look stoned.

 

I love cooking now - never thought I'd be any good but found it is pretty simple to do.

 

Slept an hour more last night - a slight improvement. I hope to get more tonight. What kind of Melatonin do you take? I haven't tried that yet.

 

Welchie - give us an update, our off-benzo hero - hope things keep getting better and better!

[[We...]]

Just so you know...important info coming at you here...there's not only phuque bur farque....we need to know these things to get through another day of benzos.

 

Chicken and spinach does sound w/d friendly.  I'll be over at 6:00!

 

Well...at least you didn't have both eyes happening at the same time.  I had eye problems too the whole time on klon and tapering.  First there was the super dark under eye circles that looked like hubby had punched me out.  Then bloodshot.  Then super dry.  Then icky crusty stuff.  It's going away, thank God and I no longer look like night of the living dead.  More like afternoon of the living dead.

 

Saige - trust me, girlfriend, if I had found anything that helped with sleep I would have been all over it like a cheap suit on a lawyer and guzzling it by the bucketload.  The problem was everything I tried seemed to have the opposite effect.  Which of course was particularly annoying.  Sorry you to hear you were up in the middle of the night.  That sux. 

 

This may sound like really lame advice, but what really helped the most with sleep/quality rest was focusing on what was most comforting...like the feel of the mattress and blankets, my breath, or a short snippet of a mantra or prayer (sorry - I'm not like the church lady or anything - which you hopefully have figured out by now).  Sometimes just connecting to my body consciously helped, especially when I was at the worst.  I'd tune into the pain with compassion.

 

Anyway - Welchie has an encouraging update for you guys - After going through a bit of a wave, I actually came out the other end significantly better.  Still symptomatic and tired, but a nice improvement.  Four weeks today!!!  I swear...at this point when things feel like they're in a nose dive, I know for sure a good window is soon to follow.  Something for you to hold onto as you go through all this.  The weight is starting to come back on, little by little.  I got so thin about two months ago it was scary - anorexic scary.  I think it's because the anxiety is going away.

 

Hope today finds you well enough.  I guess the fact we're still here showing up is good and very good.  Isn't one of you about to do another cut?

[[So...]]

Hi Welchie -

 

So glad your wave eased up and you are feeling better. I woke up so anxious and it is only slowly subsiding. I do a micro cut every day so don't notice cuts but I am not s/x free and sometimes worry that all I think about is how I am feeling. Going to go for a long walk this am and get some sun/vit D.

 

My eyes are so red too - no crust yet and I am sure I look tired because I don't sleep enough. Haven't tried anything to help sleep yet - never taken Melatonin. Wonder if it would help. I hear more is less with Melatonin...

 

Trazadone seems so tempting to help with sleep but also so scary to add an AD into this taper. I feel like I will be tapering for so long but maybe that isn't a bad thing.

 

Thank you for giving us insight Welchie into post-jump life - it is very valuable info. I so appreciate it.

 

Sad that Karl Lagerfeld died - what a fashion maverick.

 

Hope you are both great this am!

[[Sa...]]

Anyway - Welchie has an encouraging update for you guys - After going through a bit of a wave, I actually came out the other end significantly better.  Still symptomatic and tired, but a nice improvement.  Four weeks today!!!  I swear...at this point when things feel like they're in a nose dive, I know for sure a good window is soon to follow.  Something for you to hold onto as you go through all this.  The weight is starting to come back on, little by little. 

 

This is so awesome Welchie!!!!  Well done and thank you so much for the hope!  I can’t believe you both had the eyes issue, I don’t remember that from tapering before.  This time it was bad. 

 

Pete I use vitacost melatonin plus theanine.  The key (like with most supplements is tiny tiny pieces. If I took a whole pill I would have a full blown panic attack and feel drugged at the same time. Same with l theanine, I would have a panic attack if I took a whole pill, but if I sprinkle some in drinks throughout the day it helps. Ahh having dog issues, we’re fostering a pup and our other one is barking...be back soon

[[So...]]

Great news from Welchie for sure!

 

I am going to get some melatonin - I heard less is more with melatonin so will start tony and see what happens. I also heard Unisom helps people too.

 

Going for a walk in the sun then lunch - hope you are both doing great today! 

[[Sa...]]

Im hoping the small dose of melatonin works for you.  It’s good at resetting your circadian rythym and since you’ve been waking more than one night about the same time, I think its sending the wrong signal and your brain thinks it’s supposed to wake you up then.  I would wait and see if you wake at 2 or 3, then take the melatonin and your brain will get the hormone signal it’s still sleep time.  Melatonin works within minutes if taken under your tongue and if you take a small piece it wears off quick so you shouldn’t have lingering grogginess.  I’m hoping it helps you!!

 

The sun is out here too finally!  Everyone enjoy your day!!

[[We...]]

Hey!  Thought I'd give you the heads up that 'What's happening in your brain by parker' has been pinned on the board again.  It's a really good read and will help you understand that symptoms are really signs of healing.  Helped me get over the bigger bumps in the road in the early days...

[[So...]]

Thanks Saige for the Melatonin tips - I am going to get some from Whole foods today. Sounds helpful. I did sleep the best last night that I have in ages.

 

Welchie - Parker's article is great - read that and all the responses - very helpful.

 

I am wondering if I should speed up my taper or stay at the 5% every 2 weeks. I am doing a DLMT and my s/x have been the same pretty much throughout. I am lucky and my only s/x are waking up way too early, morning "chemical" physical anxiety with some intrusive thoughts and brain fog off and on with a little ring in my ear sometimes. These are the only s/x I feel and though not a great feeling - I can deal with them. I am kind of agoraphobic now but can leave the house and get stuff done for work etc.

 

I don't want to speed up my taper if it will mess things up but I also don't want to go so slow either - any thoughts?

 

Glad the sun is out in LA! I love California so much. Gloomy in NYC today.

 

Wishing you both the best. How is life post-jump Welchie?

[[We...]]

Pete - my thoughts are it's probably wise to continue with your taper rate, especially since you had to reinstate to a higher dose recently.  You want to get through this with as little shock to your system as possible and not have to deal with kindling and having to cover the same ground twice???

[[So...]]

I agree Welchie. It's frustrating to go soooo slow but I know you are right. Slow and steady is the way to do this. Thank you for the advice.

 

How are you doing today?

[[Sa...]]

I agree with Welchie too, sounds like your pace is good. I might have made a mistake by lowering too much in the past few days.  Last night I was hit with a big wave of anxiety and couldn’t sleep.  The only thing is it felt like hormones so I’m not sure if it was totally withdrawal but it’s awful and while a big less, it’s still there.  I also think it has to do with my foster pup.  Possible adopters are coming on Sat and I don’t have the best feeling about them.  The thought of sending him somewhere bad is getting to me.  I’m sure they are fine and the rescue makes sure but I just love this dog.  So that’s part of my storm I think.  I am hoping to keep on my schedule but I’m definitely in the worst wave in a long time. I will check out hat article. Thanks for the heads up!  Yeah how are you today Welchie?

[[We...]]

Yeah, sorry to dole out the tough love.  But slow and steady wins this race.  I've always been that type of friend that will actually tell someone when their fly is unzipped or they forgot to take the tag off their new shirt    Never trust someone who does not tell you these things, I say......

 

Window closed up a bit today - but the landing place is always a little better than the last one.  Got lots done yesterday and tried to make sure I didn't overdo.  I think that's one of the pitfalls and I went through it with Lyme Disease back when. 

 

Was about to sit down and snack on bone broth, kale, chicken and beets and then take another nap.

 

I was reading on another thread by ThEwAy2 that was encouraging...he said his fastest healing came on the heels of a lot more sleep so I'm not going to beat myself up for all these naps.  The weighted blanket works pretty good btw, though it may be for every one.  Bought some sleep CDs too that I listen to a little before bed while puttering.  For some reason I can't handle them while I'm actually in the bed.  Go figure.

 

Wishing you another manageable day.  Every day closer counts!!!  Good or bad.

[[So...]]

So sorry about the wave Saige - hope you are better today.

 

Great that you foster dogs. I love pets and animals so much. I hope the foster parents turn out to be good. Let us know.

[[We...]]

Saige - our posts crossed - the joint is jumping!  That is so sweet about the dog and I'm the same way.  When you meet the people maybe you'll get a better feeling.