Under the Rug (Trigger Warning)

[[no...]]

I'm ready for that nerf fight, mon.  Bring it on!

 

game ON!! 

[[mo...]]

The looser eats okra, and likes it(?)

[[co...]]

I LOVE okra!!!

 

Failed to grow in my garden this year; a big disappointment:(

[[no...]]

I LOVE okra!!!

 

Failed to grow in my garden this year; a big disappointment:(

 

ain't that strange? wonder what the deal is this year? they said it was the hottest on record worldwide since they started keeping records (this time around) but okra loves it hot! ah,well. at least the ones that sprouted from my compost pile were a joy to watch everytime i watered or it rained on them  how big is your garden cookie?

[[ea...]]

I am so glad this thread is carrying on. The humor and support is wonderful. All of us need to laugh at this crap sometimes, because their IS humor on bwd.  I lookback and now CAN laugh at the "nurse behind the fan" (one of my most vivid hallucinations way back then). Other things now make me laugh, because you cannot take this stuff so seriously you will worry yourself to death.

Annie

[[no...]]

for Welchie, and Final and Tater:

 

 

and since we need one with an actual sound effect to kick off the whole thing:

 

 

lol i forgot tha it ended with one too, now that's a good jam.  perfect for stadium rock. which team is kicking it off?

[[Ta...]]

for Welchie, and Final and Tater:

 

 

and since we need one with an actual sound effect to kick off the whole thing:

 

 

lol i forgot tha it ended with one too, now that's a good jam.  perfect for stadium rock. which team is kicking it off?

 

Nomoredrugsforme! Those songs & videos are amaze-balls! 

I sooooo love stadium rock!  Those links really made me happy!!!

 

Ladies, I am checking out for a week to head to Seattle. Boyfriend is taking me on a trip to get out of the AZ heat. Unfortunately, the Seattle forecast calls for a lot of rain, but I have a feeling we’re gonna love acting like ducks playing in the puddles.

 

Until I return, keep those heads up and keep on laughing &loving your beautiful selves.

:smitten:

[[We...]]

Enjoy Tater!!!  Sounds like a good time!!!

[[Fi...]]

Good morning everyone!  It's great to see some old Benzo Buds here and some new ones too.

 

Final - my greatest wish is that some day soon you will be here telling us how your sx are dropping off left and right, that YOU will be another voice in this painful wilderness shouting 'healing happens!', beating that drum loud and clear (or banging that gong!!!)  I wish that for all of us.  I posted on your thread when you first arrived here in the winter and I was a newbie myself in miserable acute, and I can see all your progress, though I know you're still in the thick of it.  Congrats on the 5.4mg!  Slow but SURE!  Every step, every day.

 

nomore!!!!  So happy to see you!!!  Thanks for stopping by!!!  Watch any good movies lately    I guess you, me and Tater will help Final bang the gong with the stick thingee.  Hope today finds you well.  Just between us...I set myself a highly achievable goal today...don't eat okra.  So far so good.  It's been a true pleasure getting to know you, despite the okra, which could have been a serious deal breaker.

 

Tater - dearest Tater - SUPER glad to hear you're seeing improvement in the last two weeks    'Aw shucks' about being brilliant.  Far from it.  Actually, I finally figured out what's wrong with my brain...on the left side there is nothing right, and on the right side there is nothing left.  As far as stand-up comedy goes...I'm still too tired but may be able to pull off some sit-down comedy.  It sounds like you may have some leanings toward comedy yourself    About the double chin...wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller?  On a more serious note...I've been checking out binaural beats and that 741 hertz thingee.  (Another thingee.  They're everywhere.)  You think the sound stuff is helping for real???

 

cookienose...thanks for the    and back at you.  All I really need is a hug and someone to say 'I know it's hard, but you'll be ok.  Here's a coffee and a million bucks.'  Yeah, I think that would do it for me.  Especially if the coffee was so strong it could wake up the neighbors.

 

But so ends another week without getting rich unexpectedly.

 

Thank so much Welchie.  Having outside eyes is so needed during this process.  All I see is how slow I am moving and to have you reflect my progress means a lot. I feel my age in all of this and I wish I could just let that go.  I do want to be sharing my success story in the future and am determined to get there. 

[[Fi...]]

for Welchie, and Final and Tater:

 

 

and since we need one with an actual sound effect to kick off the whole thing:

 

 

lol i forgot tha it ended with one too, now that's a good jam.  perfect for stadium rock. which team is kicking it off?

 

Love this NMD!  These are bands and music from my time.  Thanks for the inspiration. 

[[no...]]

nomore!!!!  So happy to see you!!!  Thanks for stopping by!!!  Watch any good movies lately    I guess you, me and Tater will help Final bang the gong with the stick thingee.  Hope today finds you well.  Just between us...I set myself a highly achievable goal today...don't eat okra.  So far so good.  It's been a true pleasure getting to know you, despite the okra, which could have been a serious deal breaker.

 

grrl...

 

that okra ruint (yes it's a real word, i just made it) a whole batch of gumbo this past week. teach me to pay attention to how long it sits on my counter after harvesting haha i learnt (yep, real word) it the hard way i guess. but don't worry, when you come over i'll make something where okra isn't a required ingredient lol ...do you like hot n spicy dishes?

 

as a matter of fact, just last night i was rewatching "Gaslight" but fell peacefully asleep halfway through. guess i already knew the ending and got bored! hahahha thanks Amazon Prime! lol it's actually a great story, but would've been better if Bette Davis had won the role that Ingrid Bergman got. Bette was probaly areal narc going by her biographies. what a trip for a narc to have to play the part of a narc victim...but then, they do that so well! you know Faye Dunaway who played Joan Crawford in "Mommie Dearest" and Faye was a real narc too. coincidence? i dunno, so many movie star divas were/are narcs, so it could'a (REAL WORD) been coincidence.

 

bang a gong, get it on! 

 

[[no...]]

for Welchie, and Final and Tater:

 

 

and since we need one with an actual sound effect to kick off the whole thing:

 

 

lol i forgot tha it ended with one too, now that's a good jam.  perfect for stadium rock. which team is kicking it off?

 

Love this NMD!  These are bands and music from my time.  Thanks for the inspiration.

 

you are most welcome!  seems you got great taste in music 

[[We...]]

Hey you guys!  Those songs remind me of the glory days of my misspent youth!!!  Love

T Rex!!!

 

Now here's a blast from the past....anyone ever hear of Grand Funk?  Do you remember them Final?  We're about the same age.  Saw them in concert when I was fourteen.  But my first concert was at the Cape Cod Coliseum when it was brand new, back when the earth was still molten.  We went to see Queen and a little known group called Aerosmith was the back up for them.  What a concert!!!  Of course, everyone in Aerosmith finally ended up in 'recovery'.

 

Saw Jethro Tull, and Black Sabbath etc etc.  Ah, the good old days.  It struck me the other day, as I was re-seeding part of the lawn, how I'm getting old and now I'm more worried about the weed in the seed rather than the seed in the weed     

 

But the magic moment, when I knew for sure I was getting 'long in the tooth', came decades ago when my thirteen year old niece said to me one day...you mean Paul McCartney was in a group before Wings!!!  Really!!!

 

Yeah.  Really.

 

 

 

 

[[no...]]

  It struck me the other day, as I was re-seeding part of the lawn, how I'm getting old and now I'm more worried about the weed in the seed rather than the seed in the weed     

 

But the magic moment, when I knew for sure I was getting 'long in the tooth', came decades ago when my thirteen year old niece said to me one day...you mean Paul McCartney was in a group before Wings!!!  Really!!!

 

Yeah.  Really.

 

gotta love those millenials lol!

 

i am in awe of the badass shows yall saw...Black Sabbath, i am just..and i bet Jethro Tull and Aerosmith..the smoke in the air musta stoned ya just walking thru the crowd...TRex was hot. i know he was sorta a girly dude but still...him and David Bowie RIP i still love Jeepster today...i'm just a jeepster for your love....

 

used to collect the seeds..was supposedly gonna grow something with em one day but of course never did, was just a habitual seed collecting thing. that was before hempseed protein shakes were a thing 

[[We...]]

Ha!  Never thought of saving the seeds!  And surely, don't you know, hemp seed oil now rocks for healing.  Sort of like I should have hung on to those bell bottoms.

 

Also had tickets, in my hot little hands, for a Led Zeppelin concert in Boston.  However, there was a huge riot over tickets and the  concert was cancelled.  They were thrown out of town, never allowed to play in Boston again.  But I had the damned tickets.  Can you imagine hearing Kashmir in person    Wish I had saved those tickets too.

 

Today I go to Whole Foods to complete the weekly groceries  (after the little health food store yesterday).  Nice to be amongst the living again.  Even a little.

 

Hope today finds everyone further down the healing path...

[[Fi...]]

Ha!  Never thought of saving the seeds!  And surely, don't you know, hemp seed oil now rocks for healing.  Sort of like I should have hung on to those bell bottoms.

 

Also had tickets, in my hot little hands, for a Led Zeppelin concert in Boston.  However, there was a huge riot over tickets and the  concert was cancelled.  They were thrown out of town, never allowed to play in Boston again.  But I had the damned tickets.  Can you imagine hearing Kashmir in person    Wish I had saved those tickets too.

 

Today I go to Whole Foods to complete the weekly groceries  (after the little health food store yesterday).  Nice to be amongst the living again.  Even a little.

 

Hope today finds everyone further down the healing path...

 

My first concert was  Three Dog Nigjt when was 13 or 14 at the Hershey Farn Show Arena.  One if their big hits was Jeremiah Was a Bull Frog. 

 

Welchie, did you have any agoraphobia with your taper or have you been able to get out most of the time? 

[[We...]]

Oh gosh...Three Dog Night and Jeremiah!!!  I was thirteen or so when that song came out too.

 

The agoraphobia...it was complex.  Mixed in with total and utter exhaustion (after three months of acute anxiety), a very cold and brutal New England winter, and was at my lowest scariest weight.  So didn't leave the house for months.  And yeah, I guess there was an agoraphobic type fear of leaving the house that carried over even once the weather broke and I started putting the weight back on and healing.

 

The weird part of it was...once I got out of the house I was fine...even loud obnoxious places.  And felt a lot better.  Would come home sort of 'full of myself'...strutting around feeling like I had won an Olympic Medal.

 

Final...it always felt more like I was just too fragile to handle it or something. 

 

And it was a very BIG deal to go to the mailbox or take the trash cans in.  It's like I didn't want anyone to look at me or see me.  Like I was a leper or something.  Any of this ringing a bell?

 

But for sure, once I got out to do anything I immediately felt better, stronger.  It's only been maybe the last couple of months where I'm generally comfortable being out and about.

[[no...]]

Ha!  Never thought of saving the seeds!  And surely, don't you know, hemp seed oil now rocks for healing.  Sort of like I should have hung on to those bell bottoms.

 

Also had tickets, in my hot little hands, for a Led Zeppelin concert in Boston.  However, there was a huge riot over tickets and the  concert was cancelled.  They were thrown out of town, never allowed to play in Boston again.  But I had the damned tickets.  Can you imagine hearing Kashmir in person    Wish I had saved those tickets too.

 

Today I go to Whole Foods to complete the weekly groceries  (after the little health food store yesterday).  Nice to be amongst the living again.  Even a little.

 

Hope today finds everyone further down the healing path...

 

 

oh my gawd i humbly bow before thee oh goddess of concert valhalla! bearing gifts of bellbottoms, frankincense and blueberry kush...lol! i'm not worthy! i'm not worthy!

 

 

led zeppelin was my jam all through jr and sr year high school and at parties my first husband and me threw, people actually asked if we'd play something different...so we played black sabbath hahahahaha

 

do you remember Blue Cheer? sort of psychedlic led zeppelinish but more hard i guess.. miss them too.

[[no...]]

Ha!  Never thought of saving the seeds!  And surely, don't you know, hemp seed oil now rocks for healing.  Sort of like I should have hung on to those bell bottoms.

 

Also had tickets, in my hot little hands, for a Led Zeppelin concert in Boston.  However, there was a huge riot over tickets and the  concert was cancelled.  They were thrown out of town, never allowed to play in Boston again.  But I had the damned tickets.  Can you imagine hearing Kashmir in person    Wish I had saved those tickets too.

 

Today I go to Whole Foods to complete the weekly groceries  (after the little health food store yesterday).  Nice to be amongst the living again.  Even a little.

 

Hope today finds everyone further down the healing path...

 

My first concert was  Three Dog Nigjt when was 13 or 14 at the Hershey Farn Show Arena.  One if their big hits was Jeremiah Was a Bull Frog. 

 

Welchie, did you have any agoraphobia with your taper or have you been able to get out most of the time?

 

for Final:

Joy to the world..all the boys and girls...

 

you so lucky to have grown up with 3 Dog Night! i had to learn about them afer the fact from my dad..but at least he taught me what real music is  yall hippies are so lucky! yall are the REAL DEAL

[[no...]]

The agoraphobia...it was complex.  ....And yeah, I guess there was an agoraphobic type fear of leaving the house that carried over even once the weather broke and I started putting the weight back on and healing.

 

The weird part of it was...once I got out of the house I was fine...even loud obnoxious places.  And felt a lot better...

 

And it was a very BIG deal to go to the mailbox or take the trash cans in.  It's like I didn't want anyone to look at me or see me. Like I was a leper or something.  Any of this ringing a bell?

But for sure, once I got out to do anything I immediately felt better, stronger.  It's only been maybe the last couple of months where I'm generally comfortable being out and about.

 

yeah, bells alright. i thought it was "just me". so is this a part of WD then? Final and Welchie, is anybody else going through this?

[[Fi...]]

Oh gosh...Three Dog Night and Jeremiah!!!  I was thirteen or so when that song came out too.

 

The agoraphobia...it was complex.  Mixed in with total and utter exhaustion (after three months of acute anxiety), a very cold and brutal New England winter, and was at my lowest scariest weight.  So didn't leave the house for months.  And yeah, I guess there was an agoraphobic type fear of leaving the house that carried over even once the weather broke and I started putting the weight back on and healing.

 

The weird part of it was...once I got out of the house I was fine...even loud obnoxious places.  And felt a lot better.  Would come home sort of 'full of myself'...strutting around feeling like I had won an Olympic Medal.

 

Final...it always felt more like I was just too fragile to handle it or something. 

 

And it was a very BIG deal to go to the mailbox or take the trash cans in.  It's like I didn't want anyone to look at me or see me.  Like I was a leper or something.  Any of this ringing a bell?

 

But for sure, once I got out to do anything I immediately felt better, stronger.  It's only been maybe the last couple of months where I'm generally comfortable being out and about.

 

Yes, I feel fragile and exhausted.  Plus the brain fog makes me feel vulnerable.  My husband and I went to the park today and it was exhausting to walk around.  I'm glad we went but it was good to come home.  I did feel proud I did it.

 

In glad to hear it has gotten better for you in the last few months.

[[Fi...]]

Ha!  Never thought of saving the seeds!  And surely, don't you know, hemp seed oil now rocks for healing.  Sort of like I should have hung on to those bell bottoms.

 

Also had tickets, in my hot little hands, for a Led Zeppelin concert in Boston.  However, there was a huge riot over tickets and the  concert was cancelled.  They were thrown out of town, never allowed to play in Boston again.  But I had the damned tickets.  Can you imagine hearing Kashmir in person    Wish I had saved those tickets too.

 

Today I go to Whole Foods to complete the weekly groceries  (after the little health food store yesterday).  Nice to be amongst the living again.  Even a little.

 

Hope today finds everyone further down the healing path...

 

My first concert was  Three Dog Nigjt when was 13 or 14 at the Hershey Farn Show Arena.  One if their big hits was Jeremiah Was a Bull Frog. 

 

Welchie, did you have any agoraphobia with your taper or have you been able to get out most of the time?

 

for Final:

Joy to the world..all the boys and girls...

 

you so lucky to have grown up with 3 Dog Night! i had to learn about them afer the fact from my dad..but at least he taught me what real music is  yall hippies are so lucky! yall are the REAL DEAL

 

There was some really good music back then.  Glad your Dad turned you on to it.

[[We...]]

That link....WHOA...reminds me of a couple of acid trips      I remember playing records (yes records) over and over and not getting sick of them.  Anyone remember the 8 tracks in their cars?  It was very cool at the time.

 

Thanks Final.  It'll get better for you too.  for dragging your 'mounds' to the park despite it all.  Every little victory is HUGE...  I'm rooting for you!

 

Ok...no more concert war stories out of me.  But I do have a couple other ones.    I will spare you though....

 

Besides, these days my speed is more George Winston.  And gongs.

 

Hey, anyone else here watch 90 Day Fiancee?  I can't believe I got hooked on that show.  This week we are about to find out that Sumi is actually already married!!!

[[no...]]

That link....WHOA...reminds me of a couple of acid trips      I remember playing records (yes records) over and over and not getting sick of them.  Anyone remember the 8 tracks in their cars?  It was very cool at the time.

...

Besides, these days my speed is more George Winston.  And gongs.

 

 

is George Winston  the composer of the Peanuts soundtacks?

 

the last 8 track i had was Sabbath. i wish i still had my grandad's records, stuff like Dance,Gypsy,Dance and big band stuff...Glenn Miller..

[[ea...]]

LOL! You know you are getting old if you remember records and albums! How things have changed. We were so innocent back then, giggling over the Beatles and swooning over some other musician. I once corresponded with the mother of Herman Hermit - do you remember that group? British, of course.

 

Jump ahead to the 6o's, the hey day of rock. Because I was a young hippie chick then, all I did was go to rock concerts. I saw Jimi Hendrix live 3 times, and OMG what a great show. Yes, he set his guitar on fire, yes, he tromped all over it. Violence and beauty combined is potent, especially to vulnerable young people.

 

In my 20's I travelled cross country from DC to Arizona with a male friend. I was into Todd Rundgren then. "Hello Its Me" guy. We brought 8 track tapes and listened to rock the entire time. We got to the Grand Canyon and Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" fit that so well, as we gazed down into this enormous canyon, created by Mother Nature.

 

I am rambling on here. But I am sure some you can relate!

east