Positive Feedback Please - Who felt improvements as they tapered?

[[Su...]]

Collective Heart!  Now's that's a concept to remember and celebrate..

Thanks for the welcome harmony, nice to see you here!

SS

[[Ma...]]

Collective Heart!  Now's that's a concept to remember and celebrate..

Thanks for the welcome harmony, nice to see you here!

SS

 

Collective Hearts ♥️  ❤️ , nice 

[[Ca...]]

Hey Guys...

Got more landscaping done..!!

And a good day..!!

 

Hi SS..

 

Be well...

 

[[no...]]

Hey Guys...

Got more landscaping done..!!

And a good day..!!

 

Hi SS..

 

Be well...

Yay!!!   

[[Ca...]]

Hey Guys...

Got more landscaping done..!!

And a good day..!!

 

Hi SS..

 

Be well...

Yay!!!   

Awww.. -I miss everyone...

(Had older teens here too)..

 

[[Un...]]

Wishing everyone a good day, better than the last and hoping the positives keep revealing themselves to you all 

 

❤️ Our Collective Heart Beats Strong

[[Ma...]]

Wishing everyone a good day, better than the last and hoping the positives keep revealing themselves to you all 

 

❤️ Our Collective Heart Beats Strong

 

Collective Hearts

♥️  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

[[Un...]]

Hi Positivity Friends

 

I do keep a gratitude journal, since beginning the book.  It has you do a list of 10 things you’re grateful for per day and why.  And it incorporates a daily gratitude practice to focus on, as well.  A couple of days I was unable to write my gratitudes because of mental and physical fatigue, so I picked up where I left off and instead kept thinking about what I’m grateful for each day.  I’ve found it’s much more effective when actually writing and speaking them.  It took me two hours today, needed to take breaks haha.  There’s a chapter in it about turning negatives into positives, which I’m on today - it’s been helping so much, as I’m having a wave of depression.  I might stay on this chapter until it shifts. I haven’t read Eckhart’s books yet, but did a course he offered online a couple years ago and have watched so many of his videos.  Amazing!! 

❤️ PS - It’s the heart of the collective 

Hey all Positive Buddies!! Just love this post 

 

Uni!! What a great focus!! Funny you should mention turning a negative into a positive! I did just that only yesterday. For me, authentic (positive) intention is vitally important to practice.  I (thought) I lost a very valuable Longines watch which holds much more sentimental value than $$$ value by a country mile!! When I realized it was most likely lost, I decided I was not going to concern myself. I knew somehow whatever would be, would just be. So instead of stressing and worrying (that's such a waste of valuable energy), I sent a wish to the person who found it that they would get the same joy out of the watch it gave me. I truly meant it. And my wish came true! Within a few minutes of this thought, my husband sent me a photo; he had found the watch in a place I would never have found it (in fact I've no idea how it got there!). He and I share the same sense for the watch's true value. He said he felt compelled to look in the most unlikely place, to the point he almost didn't bother, but he did and there it was!! 

 

The mind is so amazingly powerful!! It's so easy to underestimate it's power. I truly feel what we focus on, and hold in our hearts is incredibly important; not just to help heal from benzos, but help us grow as human beings, become more consciously aware of all the beauty in the world. Way too much focus on the negatives.

 

I love the way you decided to keep going regardless, picking up from where you left off and instead kept thinking about what you were grateful for! Also not giving into the wave of the "D" word. Even the D word has it's positive value if turned around      Harmonee ❤️ I just love "the heart of the collective!" ❤️ I've added that one to my list 

 

Harmonee, I absolutely believe in the power of gratitude and LOVE the example you shared!  It’s amazing how much pure, loving energy can do.  It’s magical medicine.  Wow, and how cool you got your watch back - of course you did!  Even when things feel so bad, we can still be grateful for what we do have.  On my more challenging days, I focus my gratitude on the wonderful people on this forum, water, food, my senses, nature, the healing process and anything that feels within grasp.  It may not make everything feel instantly better, but that ripple effect flows out into the universe and WILL have a positive outcome.  It’s law! 

 

“What we hold in our hearts” - couldn’t have said it better myself. 

 

That “D” wave has passed, and I’m so grateful for that!  I’m also grateful for it happening because we actually learn through joy AND pain.  It makes me wonder if I had not kept up with turning the negatives into positives, manifesting practices, gratitude, even at the bare minimum that I could do, would I be feeling this much better today?  I doubt it!

 

A good friend on here says I’m in the learning curve phase, with this withdrawal process.  That made me feel good because I love learning and it’s empowering to know that even in difficult times, the magic is still going on behind the scenes.  I’m learning from keeping a daily benzo journal what the patterns are, the length of time is similar each time, what my triggers are, what else has been affecting me and why it can send me into a wave.  It will get easier to understand and accept each time and I can get better at knowing it WILL pass. 

 

Some parrots were perched out in our tree over the weekend and I was in awe.  I watched them and admired their beauty, listened to them talking, interacting.  It brought back memories of when I was a child and had a pet parrot.  I wrote in my gratitude journal first thing this morning about those parrots I got to see in our tree and how amazing it was.  Well, as I kept writing another ten minutes or so, two parrots landed on the telephone wires outside our balcony, where I was sitting!  How incredible that I expressed gratitude for the parrots I got the pleasure of watching over the weekend and the Universe sent more!  It’s awe-inspiring, the power of our own mind. 

 

❤️❤️❤️

[[Un...]]

Wishing everyone a good day, better than the last and hoping the positives keep revealing themselves to you all 

 

❤️ Our Collective Heart Beats Strong

 

Collective Hearts

♥️  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

 

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[[Ha...]]

 

Harmonee, I absolutely believe in the power of gratitude and LOVE the example you shared!  It’s amazing how much pure, loving energy can do.  It’s magical medicine.  Wow, and how cool you got your watch back - of course you did!  Even when things feel so bad, we can still be grateful for what we do have.  On my more challenging days, I focus my gratitude on the wonderful people on this forum, water, food, my senses, nature, the healing process and anything that feels within grasp.  It may not make everything feel instantly better, but that ripple effect flows out into the universe and WILL have a positive outcome.  It’s law! 

 

“What we hold in our hearts” - couldn’t have said it better myself. 

 

That “D” wave has passed, and I’m so grateful for that!  I’m also grateful for it happening because we actually learn through joy AND pain.  It makes me wonder if I had not kept up with turning the negatives into positives, manifesting practices, gratitude, even at the bare minimum that I could do, would I be feeling this much better today?  I doubt it!

 

A good friend on here says I’m in the learning curve phase, with this withdrawal process.  That made me feel good because I love learning and it’s empowering to know that even in difficult times, the magic is still going on behind the scenes.  I’m learning from keeping a daily benzo journal what the patterns are, the length of time is similar each time, what my triggers are, what else has been affecting me and why it can send me into a wave.  It will get easier to understand and accept each time and I can get better at knowing it WILL pass. 

 

Some parrots were perched out in our tree over the weekend and I was in awe.  I watched them and admired their beauty, listened to them talking, interacting.  It brought back memories of when I was a child and had a pet parrot.  I wrote in my gratitude journal first thing this morning about those parrots I got to see in our tree and how amazing it was.  Well, as I kept writing another ten minutes or so, two parrots landed on the telephone wires outside our balcony, where I was sitting!  How incredible that I expressed gratitude for the parrots I got the pleasure of watching over the weekend and the Universe sent more!  It’s awe-inspiring, the power of our own mind. 

 

❤️❤️❤️

I completely relate to everything you wrote  It is amazing what you just "stumble" upon when everything aligns (for lack of a better phrase). I find in the small hours of the morning I often wake up with awful thoughts. They are such distorted thoughts, which in the past have plummeted into awful "D", sometimes for days. I've been practicing meditation for a number of years now, but up until recently, I could only "deal" with them for a short time. Effectively they would get a hold of me again at some point. Id tell myself "accept, accept, accept!" but I wasn't being authentic. I hadn't considered they were there to teach me something, not be exiled.  I realized I was only accepting to rid myself of the feelings. I learned my intentions were out of alignment, so to speak. I had overlooked  I have this "place" where I observe everything as it comes into my conscious awareness. I can't describe the "place" or perhaps a better word is the "space". It could be best described as being in complete conscious awareness, disconnecting yet accepting what is being experienced.  I can now simply observe (without judgement yet with kindness) the unhelpful thoughts and they "absorb" and dissipate within that "space" of awareness.  Might sound a bit "out there", sorry  It would seem (open minded) scientists are now recognizing this "phenomenon", what was once considered "spiritual" nonsense and able to explain it scientifically. They view that "law" as an emergent, self-organizing process that regulates the flow of energy ...

 

You might like to check out Dan Siegel

? I especially love his  "Wheel of Awareness" meditation? It is one of the most powerful meditations I've ever experienced. Here's a link if you feel like it https://youtu.be/ODlFhOKahmk ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Harmonee

[[no...]]

Hi everyone  I am just letting everyone know that  I have read LOTS of post over the last 2 weeks where the poster said their taper was dreadful but once they got very low or completely off in a short space of time felt radically better than at any point during their taper . Yay!!  They were a mixed bag of long term and short term users, and some of them had written a success story in a shorter than expected time and are still doing well and feeling better by the day or week 

 

So I just thought I'd share the good news with you all, length of time and dose don't matter, these were people that were on high doses, low doses, year's, months  weeks or days on them and are doing really well or completely healed now which being along term high dose Polly drugged,  on and off all kind of Benzos doses up and down and CT's off Benzos and other drugs or too fast a taper I am really glad to see . Oh yeah!!!!  ...

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[Un...]]

 

Harmonee, I absolutely believe in the power of gratitude and LOVE the example you shared!  It’s amazing how much pure, loving energy can do.  It’s magical medicine.  Wow, and how cool you got your watch back - of course you did!  Even when things feel so bad, we can still be grateful for what we do have.  On my more challenging days, I focus my gratitude on the wonderful people on this forum, water, food, my senses, nature, the healing process and anything that feels within grasp.  It may not make everything feel instantly better, but that ripple effect flows out into the universe and WILL have a positive outcome.  It’s law! 

 

“What we hold in our hearts” - couldn’t have said it better myself. 

 

That “D” wave has passed, and I’m so grateful for that!  I’m also grateful for it happening because we actually learn through joy AND pain.  It makes me wonder if I had not kept up with turning the negatives into positives, manifesting practices, gratitude, even at the bare minimum that I could do, would I be feeling this much better today?  I doubt it!

 

A good friend on here says I’m in the learning curve phase, with this withdrawal process.  That made me feel good because I love learning and it’s empowering to know that even in difficult times, the magic is still going on behind the scenes.  I’m learning from keeping a daily benzo journal what the patterns are, the length of time is similar each time, what my triggers are, what else has been affecting me and why it can send me into a wave.  It will get easier to understand and accept each time and I can get better at knowing it WILL pass. 

 

Some parrots were perched out in our tree over the weekend and I was in awe.  I watched them and admired their beauty, listened to them talking, interacting.  It brought back memories of when I was a child and had a pet parrot.  I wrote in my gratitude journal first thing this morning about those parrots I got to see in our tree and how amazing it was.  Well, as I kept writing another ten minutes or so, two parrots landed on the telephone wires outside our balcony, where I was sitting!  How incredible that I expressed gratitude for the parrots I got the pleasure of watching over the weekend and the Universe sent more!  It’s awe-inspiring, the power of our own mind. 

 

❤️❤️❤️

I completely relate to everything you wrote  It is amazing what you just "stumble" upon when everything aligns (for lack of a better phrase). I find in the small hours of the morning I often wake up with awful thoughts. They are such distorted thoughts, which in the past have plummeted into awful "D", sometimes for days. I've been practicing meditation for a number of years now, but up until recently, I could only "deal" with them for a short time. Effectively they would get a hold of me again at some point. Id tell myself "accept, accept, accept!" but I wasn't being authentic. I hadn't considered they were there to teach me something, not be exiled.  I realized I was only accepting to rid myself of the feelings. I learned my intentions were out of alignment, so to speak. I had overlooked  I have this "place" where I observe everything as it comes into my conscious awareness. I can't describe the "place" or perhaps a better word is the "space". It could be best described as being in complete conscious awareness, disconnecting yet accepting what is being experienced.  I can now simply observe (without judgement yet with kindness) the unhelpful thoughts and they "absorb" and dissipate within that "space" of awareness.  Might sound a bit "out there", sorry  It would seem (open minded) scientists are now recognizing this "phenomenon", what was once considered "spiritual" nonsense and able to explain it scientifically. They view that "law" as an emergent, self-organizing process that regulates the flow of energy ...

 

You might like to check out Dan Siegel

? I especially love his  "Wheel of Awareness" meditation? It is one of the most powerful meditations I've ever experienced. Here's a link if you feel like it https://youtu.be/ODlFhOKahmk ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Harmonee

 

Thank you for the links, Harmonee   I’ll definitely check him out.  I’ve been in a stress-induced wave so trying with all my might to keep at the positive, or at the very least - ACCEPTANCE, mind set.  I hope you are doing well.  Love this group and all the positive and uplifting contributions ❤️❤️❤️

[[Un...]]

Hi everyone  I am just letting everyone know that  I have read LOTS of post over the last 2 weeks where the poster said their taper was dreadful but once they got very low or completely off in a short space of time felt radically better than at any point during their taper . Yay!!  They were a mixed bag of long term and short term users, and some of them had written a success story in a shorter than expected time and are still doing well and feeling better by the day or week 

 

So I just thought I'd share the good news with you all, length of time and dose don't matter, these were people that were on high doses, low doses, year's, months  weeks or days on them and are doing really well or completely healed now which being along term high dose Polly drugged,  on and off all kind of Benzos doses up and down and CT's off Benzos and other drugs or too fast a taper I am really glad to see . Oh yeah!!!!  ...

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

Nova, I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you posted this.  It’s exactly what I needed to read today, and right at this moment!  Thank you so much for sharing all of this info with us, it gives me such hope and the strength to hold on.  I know it helps many others to see this is possible, to heal no matter what amount, length of time, method, etc.  what great news!  I search for these kinds of stories and when I find one, I devour it!  Feel free to post links to stories, too.  I hadn’t thought about doing that before now, but I will.  They are the beacon of light for us all!  Thank you again

[[no...]]

Hi everyone  I am just letting everyone know that  I have read LOTS of post over the last 2 weeks where the poster said their taper was dreadful but once they got very low or completely off in a short space of time felt radically better than at any point during their taper . Yay!!  They were a mixed bag of long term and short term users, and some of them had written a success story in a shorter than expected time and are still doing well and feeling better by the day or week 

 

So I just thought I'd share the good news with you all, length of time and dose don't matter, these were people that were on high doses, low doses, year's, months  weeks or days on them and are doing really well or completely healed now which being along term high dose Polly drugged,  on and off all kind of Benzos doses up and down and CT's off Benzos and other drugs or too fast a taper I am really glad to see . Oh yeah!!!!  ...

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

Nova, I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you posted this.  It’s exactly what I needed to read today, and right at this moment!  Thank you so much for sharing all of this info with us, it gives me such hope and the strength to hold on.  I know it helps many others to see this is possible, to heal no matter what amount, length of time, method, etc.  what great news!  I search for these kinds of stories and when I find one, I devour it!  Feel free to post links to stories, too.  I hadn’t thought about doing that before now, but I will.  They are the beacon of light for us all!  Thank you again

Hi Uni  I'm glad you found it helpful, believe me  I know how you feel  At 6am I had to put a note through my neighbors door who I've only spoken to once for seconds  as I've not lived her long as they have screaming LOUD rows that echo through my home plus slamming every door in their flat while screaming at each other .

 

I had to move  here due  to new  neighbour  from hell moving in above me from my long term home where I'd lived for many year's 10 months ago and ended up unable to cope with withdrawal and tapering. I had to up-dose from 3.45mg to 10mg after going through year's of hell to get from 30mg of Diazepam plus CT's off 40mg of Temazepam a night and big doses of lots of other drugs which was upsetting enough after all that suffering in order to move .

 

Then  My new Doctor refused to allow me to taper at my own rate as my old one did and is pulling me off way too fast for the amount of year's and doses I was on and now I got this going on???    !@%^)?! Anyway I told them the truth in the note that I'm very unwell and coming off a long term prescribed drug and its horrific , and their rowing and noise is stressing me out big time   And that I'd rather have spoken to them than sent them a letter but I'm in too much agony to cope plus NO PROPER  SLEEP FOR AGES!  And I'm in agony I could barely write the note for the pain and shaking and told them that as well I just hope they can read the crappy writing . I did it all in big capitals anyway as I can't write properly so they should get the message OK.

 

Last week I had to crawl and knock their door as the dick head boyfriend decided it was a good idea to go drilling an hammering on the walls between us from 10pm until 11pm??  Wtf?  if I hadn't it would have gone on way later, that put me into an even worse wave for 3 days, plus their rowing is escalating everything I hope they take notice of the letter as I don't want the hassle of having to report them to the housing.  I can't cope with all that I had that over my other place it was hell withdrawing and official's back and fore all the time, and the police as well, so I am praying they have compassion  for other people and the effect their having not just on each other and their baby bit others .

 

 

Anyway here's one success story for starters  below, I find I have to have the head to deal with reading them at the right time as everything freaks me out most of the time but I know  that its the same for many others on here too, I wish everyone peace and speedy healing and the strength and tenacity to cope  with whatever we have to handle to be free well and happy again.

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

 

12 years of Xanax for sleep. No More, all better now!

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=166995.0;topicseen

[[Gw...]]

The ongoing positivity in this thread is amazing. Uni, I just want to take a moment to thank you for keeping the momentum! It's so easy to become discouraged and so I love reading about the work others are putting into examining and improving themselves and their lives as they heal. I've been incorporating many gratitude posts in my daily journal as I go about having a mid-life crisis at 33, and it's made such a difference!

 

Yesterday I helped my husband clean the house to prepare for an old friend coming to visit. We didn't go out of our way to go out and do anything special; instead we just invited him to see how we live day to day. It has been so uplifting to feel a sense of pride in the little things. This morning I woke up before everyone else (typical these days) and sat on our front porch to watch the sunrise. It's cool out, which is a nice break during this heat wave and while the view of our city street isn't exactly breathtaking, it's finally starting to feel like home after almost two years of living here.

 

Anyway I am feeling so good about this little window that I wanted to share the moment with people here. Mornings like this one remind me that I am healing, and that happiness is still within my reach. Anyone else have windows, however brief, where they feel like they are waking up or even coming back to life after so many years of being sedated?

 

I hope each and every one of you happiness in the little, ordinary moments that make up our daily lives.

 

Gwinna

[[Ro...]]

Hello friends of this positive thread!

I continue being happy (even if I have horrible symptoms!) as I continue reducing my dose of Alprazolam. Now I am 90% less of my original dose...and for the first time in 40 years I could make it..

That means that in a couple of months I will be free!!! And that's my happiness...I don't care if my symptoms are that bad: not to be prisoner anymore is that keep me shining!

Good Sunday to everyone who reads this...

[[Un...]]

 

Harmonee, I absolutely believe in the power of gratitude and LOVE the example you shared!  It’s amazing how much pure, loving energy can do.  It’s magical medicine.  Wow, and how cool you got your watch back - of course you did!  Even when things feel so bad, we can still be grateful for what we do have.  On my more challenging days, I focus my gratitude on the wonderful people on this forum, water, food, my senses, nature, the healing process and anything that feels within grasp.  It may not make everything feel instantly better, but that ripple effect flows out into the universe and WILL have a positive outcome.  It’s law! 

 

“What we hold in our hearts” - couldn’t have said it better myself. 

 

That “D” wave has passed, and I’m so grateful for that!  I’m also grateful for it happening because we actually learn through joy AND pain.  It makes me wonder if I had not kept up with turning the negatives into positives, manifesting practices, gratitude, even at the bare minimum that I could do, would I be feeling this much better today?  I doubt it!

 

A good friend on here says I’m in the learning curve phase, with this withdrawal process.  That made me feel good because I love learning and it’s empowering to know that even in difficult times, the magic is still going on behind the scenes.  I’m learning from keeping a daily benzo journal what the patterns are, the length of time is similar each time, what my triggers are, what else has been affecting me and why it can send me into a wave.  It will get easier to understand and accept each time and I can get better at knowing it WILL pass. 

 

Some parrots were perched out in our tree over the weekend and I was in awe.  I watched them and admired their beauty, listened to them talking, interacting.  It brought back memories of when I was a child and had a pet parrot.  I wrote in my gratitude journal first thing this morning about those parrots I got to see in our tree and how amazing it was.  Well, as I kept writing another ten minutes or so, two parrots landed on the telephone wires outside our balcony, where I was sitting!  How incredible that I expressed gratitude for the parrots I got the pleasure of watching over the weekend and the Universe sent more!  It’s awe-inspiring, the power of our own mind. 

 

❤️❤️❤️

I completely relate to everything you wrote  It is amazing what you just "stumble" upon when everything aligns (for lack of a better phrase). I find in the small hours of the morning I often wake up with awful thoughts. They are such distorted thoughts, which in the past have plummeted into awful "D", sometimes for days. I've been practicing meditation for a number of years now, but up until recently, I could only "deal" with them for a short time. Effectively they would get a hold of me again at some point. Id tell myself "accept, accept, accept!" but I wasn't being authentic. I hadn't considered they were there to teach me something, not be exiled.  I realized I was only accepting to rid myself of the feelings. I learned my intentions were out of alignment, so to speak. I had overlooked  I have this "place" where I observe everything as it comes into my conscious awareness. I can't describe the "place" or perhaps a better word is the "space". It could be best described as being in complete conscious awareness, disconnecting yet accepting what is being experienced.  I can now simply observe (without judgement yet with kindness) the unhelpful thoughts and they "absorb" and dissipate within that "space" of awareness.  Might sound a bit "out there", sorry  It would seem (open minded) scientists are now recognizing this "phenomenon", what was once considered "spiritual" nonsense and able to explain it scientifically. They view that "law" as an emergent, self-organizing process that regulates the flow of energy ...

 

You might like to check out Dan Siegel

? I especially love his  "Wheel of Awareness" meditation? It is one of the most powerful meditations I've ever experienced. Here's a link if you feel like it https://youtu.be/ODlFhOKahmk ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Harmonee

 

Harmonee ❤️

 

It was such a pleasure RE-reading this post and fully absorbing it this time (I was having major cog fog because of what I now know what heavy duty PMS in lovely WD )!  I love your language and it mirrors my own, so we speak similar “soul” languages.  Love it!!  It’s so refreshing to read what you share and the way you express.  So, what I wanted to say is..  it’s so great you’ve been able to come to a space of observing with conscious awareness, instead of being all-consumed.  Bravo!  This is what I’ve been practicing and hope I can get to where you are, with this.  It is getting better!  Thank you for sharing such an insightful and beautiful post about how you’ve been shifting things in your perspective to accept and allow, rather than to resist.  And what you said about “accepting” for the sole purpose to rid yourself of these experiences - I believe that’s what I’ve been doing when things feel intolerable and scary, which isn’t often.  Mostly mornings, though.  I admire your ability to remain curious about the thoughts and feelings so you can learn from them and allow them to reveal what they are trying to teach you.  I’m going to try doing this, starting now!  What a wonderful way to experience life, when going through challenges and difficulties.  Often times, I start to sink because I feel I’m not doing much of anything with my life right now, but then I realize, “HEY!  This is a big job and I am meant to do it.  There is a purpose for all of it.  And who am I to think I know the answers to they ‘why’ of it all?”  Once the morning bullies calm, I can usually get a good grip on perspective.  Usually.  But I’d like to implement this during the morning bullies so perhaps they won’t be bullies anymore but teachers.  Thank you, wise one!  ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️  Much love and healing to you!

[[Un...]]

Hi everyone  I am just letting everyone know that  I have read LOTS of post over the last 2 weeks where the poster said their taper was dreadful but once they got very low or completely off in a short space of time felt radically better than at any point during their taper . Yay!!  They were a mixed bag of long term and short term users, and some of them had written a success story in a shorter than expected time and are still doing well and feeling better by the day or week 

 

So I just thought I'd share the good news with you all, length of time and dose don't matter, these were people that were on high doses, low doses, year's, months  weeks or days on them and are doing really well or completely healed now which being along term high dose Polly drugged,  on and off all kind of Benzos doses up and down and CT's off Benzos and other drugs or too fast a taper I am really glad to see . Oh yeah!!!!  ...

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

Nova, I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you posted this.  It’s exactly what I needed to read today, and right at this moment!  Thank you so much for sharing all of this info with us, it gives me such hope and the strength to hold on.  I know it helps many others to see this is possible, to heal no matter what amount, length of time, method, etc.  what great news!  I search for these kinds of stories and when I find one, I devour it!  Feel free to post links to stories, too.  I hadn’t thought about doing that before now, but I will.  They are the beacon of light for us all!  Thank you again

Hi Uni  I'm glad you found it helpful, believe me  I know how you feel  At 6am I had to put a note through my neighbors door who I've only spoken to once for seconds  as I've not lived her long as they have screaming LOUD rows that echo through my home plus slamming every door in their flat while screaming at each other .

 

I had to move  here due  to new  neighbour  from hell moving in above me from my long term home where I'd lived for many year's 10 months ago and ended up unable to cope with withdrawal and tapering. I had to up-dose from 3.45mg to 10mg after going through year's of hell to get from 30mg of Diazepam plus CT's off 40mg of Temazepam a night and big doses of lots of other drugs which was upsetting enough after all that suffering in order to move .

 

Then  My new Doctor refused to allow me to taper at my own rate as my old one did and is pulling me off way too fast for the amount of year's and doses I was on and now I got this going on???    !@%^)?! Anyway I told them the truth in the note that I'm very unwell and coming off a long term prescribed drug and its horrific , and their rowing and noise is stressing me out big time   And that I'd rather have spoken to them than sent them a letter but I'm in too much agony to cope plus NO PROPER  SLEEP FOR AGES!  And I'm in agony I could barely write the note for the pain and shaking and told them that as well I just hope they can read the crappy writing . I did it all in big capitals anyway as I can't write properly so they should get the message OK.

 

Last week I had to crawl and knock their door as the dick head boyfriend decided it was a good idea to go drilling an hammering on the walls between us from 10pm until 11pm??  Wtf?  if I hadn't it would have gone on way later, that put me into an even worse wave for 3 days, plus their rowing is escalating everything I hope they take notice of the letter as I don't want the hassle of having to report them to the housing.  I can't cope with all that I had that over my other place it was hell withdrawing and official's back and fore all the time, and the police as well, so I am praying they have compassion  for other people and the effect their having not just on each other and their baby bit others .

 

 

Anyway here's one success story for starters  below, I find I have to have the head to deal with reading them at the right time as everything freaks me out most of the time but I know  that its the same for many others on here too, I wish everyone peace and speedy healing and the strength and tenacity to cope  with whatever we have to handle to be free well and happy again.

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

 

12 years of Xanax for sleep. No More, all better now!

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=166995.0;topicseen

 

Hi Nova ❤️

 

I’m so sorry you’re being triggered by so much stress in your external world.  You are one strong individual, physically and mentally.  I’m going to hold the intention in my heart for you that the neighbors will respect what you’ve written and have some compassion.  We need so much peace in our environment, which is not always possible, to undergo the chaos our bodies and minds are experincing in order to rebuild and rebalance us.  Ironically, I just had a situation with the next door neighbor to my home (which is 4 hours away from where we live because of my husband’s job).  We try to go there every weekend and I’m not always able to, but we did this past weekend.  The neighbor has been taking advantage of the fact we are not living there and plugging her phones and other things into my front porch electrical outlets.  It has been triggering me getting the alerts from my security cameras and seeing what she is doing.  Well, yesterday she waited until we left to head back to LA and within 5 minutes on the road I got an alert.  She walked around my house looking into the windows and then plugged in her phones.  We turned around and grabbed the phones, took them to the police station and showed them the recordings of what she’s been doing.  They took care of it and told us what to do should it happen again, so they can press charges.  It was distressing seeing someone on my property while I am away and I’m so glad it happened yesterday so we could do something about it.  It kicked my adrenaline into overdrive, which isn’t good for our nervous systems in WD, and I’m so glad I chose to go to the police instead of try to manage confronting her on my own.  Who knows what mess that could have created.  They are troublesome and have cops at their house a lot, so best to steer clear. 

 

I hope your circumstances improve so you get the peace you need and deserve, Nova.  I just wanted to share that I can elate on some level. 

 

Thank you for posting this success story!  I’m going to read it now.  Positives keep on coming! 

 

❤️

[[Un...]]

The ongoing positivity in this thread is amazing. Uni, I just want to take a moment to thank you for keeping the momentum! It's so easy to become discouraged and so I love reading about the work others are putting into examining and improving themselves and their lives as they heal. I've been incorporating many gratitude posts in my daily journal as I go about having a mid-life crisis at 33, and it's made such a difference!

 

Yesterday I helped my husband clean the house to prepare for an old friend coming to visit. We didn't go out of our way to go out and do anything special; instead we just invited him to see how we live day to day. It has been so uplifting to feel a sense of pride in the little things. This morning I woke up before everyone else (typical these days) and sat on our front porch to watch the sunrise. It's cool out, which is a nice break during this heat wave and while the view of our city street isn't exactly breathtaking, it's finally starting to feel like home after almost two years of living here.

 

Anyway I am feeling so good about this little window that I wanted to share the moment with people here. Mornings like this one remind me that I am healing, and that happiness is still within my reach. Anyone else have windows, however brief, where they feel like they are waking up or even coming back to life after so many years of being sedated?

 

I hope each and every one of you happiness in the little, ordinary moments that make up our daily lives.

 

Gwinna

 

Hi Gwinna ❤️

 

First off, I want to congratulate you on the window you’re experiencing!!  Waaaahoooo 

Sooo glad you’re here and one of our Positives!  Thank you for contributing!!  Each and every one of you makes such a huge difference on so many levels. 

 

That’s GREAT you’re incorporating gratitudes in your journal entries!  It’s incredible how powerful they are.  When I wake up feeling mentally defeated from the morning “bullies” and get into writing out my 10 gratitudes, followed by why I’m grateful for them, I notice my mood, perspective and energy shifts.  Blows me away.  Sometimes it shifts a lot and sometimes a little, but hey!  It’s better!!  I hope this helps you in the same way 

 

How wonderful that you accomplished so much, helping your husband clean and prepare for your friend to come for a visit AND actually having a friend visit, that’s huge!  Isn’t it incredible how doing things like this can spark you into a better space!?  I’m so happy for you!  I love the way you described your morning and how you’re feeling.  Thank you again for sharing with us!  May the good vibes keep flowing and window stay open for you! 

 

Yes, I’ve had these windows where I feel a sense of who I am underneath.  Saturday and Sunday I felt calm and had these memories start to come back of how it feels to be in my home, for the first time since my CT.  It gives me great hope and faith that I was able to experience even small bits of warm feelings for my home, because I had been not only feeling a barrier between myself and “her” but also a lot of triggering and dark feelings.  Friday was full of doom there and I had to sit outside on the steps letting all the fear and hypervigilance flow through me, but the next two days I was able to spend time alone inside and feel a sense of calm, my heart recalling, “this is my home and I love her!”  This leads me to believe that someday I will be able to feel the full warmth and safety I’d always felt there before.  I’m so grateful for our glimpses! 

 

❤️❤️❤️

 

Uni

 

[[Un...]]

Hello friends of this positive thread!

I continue being happy (even if I have horrible symptoms!) as I continue reducing my dose of Alprazolam. Now I am 90% less of my original dose...and for the first time in 40 years I could make it..

That means that in a couple of months I will be free!!! And that's my happiness...I don't care if my symptoms are that bad: not to be prisoner anymore is that keep me shining!

Good Sunday to everyone who reads this...

 

Hello Rodolfo ❤️

 

What a fabulous attitude you have!  Congratulations on being at 90% of your original dose!!!!  What a huge accomplishment; victory shall be yours!  I’m so very impressed that you are beating this thing after 40 years and will be free in just a couple months.  It makes me so happy knowing you are taking  your life back; you are such an inspiration!  It is my hope that your symptoms lessen quickly so you can experience a smooth stepping off of Alprazolam.  I’m looking forward to celebrating your benzo freedom with you 

[[Ha...]]

Hi ++++ group!!!

 

Such high spirits! So contagious 

 

Gwinna, I loved your post and how beautifully you summed things up by saying "I hope each and every one of you happiness in the little, ordinary moments that make up our daily lives." It really is as you say, that happiness is in the little, ordinary moments!! I think it's when you notice and appreciate the ordinary, everyday things, rather than the short lived "big thrills" where true and more sustainable happiness resides.

 

Rodolfo, your words were so uplifting!!! "that's my happiness...I don't care if my symptoms are that bad: not to be prisoner anymore is that keep me shining!"  And congrats on being 90% down after 40 YEARS!!!! Maravillosa sabiduría!!  :yippee:

 

Uni loved your post too  You get those "morning “bullies” too? I wonder what they are and why they seem to have so much "power" in the small hours of the morning?  I love the way you explained that "...the morning “bullies” and get into writing out my 10 gratitudes, followed by why I’m grateful for them, I notice my mood, perspective and energy shifts.  Blows me away.  Sometimes it shifts a lot and sometimes a little, but hey!  It’s better!!"

 

And this bit "Friday was full of doom there and I had to sit outside on the steps letting all the fear and hypervigilance flow through me, but the next two days I was able to spend time alone inside and feel a sense of calm, my heart recalling, “this is my home and I love her!” 

 

Sometimes I think we can get caught up in a kind of mental feedback loop from hell (something I read about in a book). We need to give ourselves a break if (and when) we get caught up in these loops. You seemed to deal so well with those pesky bullies  by allowing it to flow through you rather than getting caught up in the loop!!

 

Sending my deepest gratitude to you all    Harmonee

[[no...]]

Good morning all 

Hi everyone  I am just letting everyone know that  I have read LOTS of post over the last 2 weeks where the poster said their taper was dreadful but once they got very low or completely off in a short space of time felt radically better than at any point during their taper . Yay!!  They were a mixed bag of long term and short term users, and some of them had written a success story in a shorter than expected time and are still doing well and feeling better by the day or week 

 

So I just thought I'd share the good news with you all, length of time and dose don't matter, these were people that were on high doses, low doses, year's, months  weeks or days on them and are doing really well or completely healed now which being along term high dose Polly drugged,  on and off all kind of Benzos doses up and down and CT's off Benzos and other drugs or too fast a taper I am really glad to see . Oh yeah!!!!  ...

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

Nova, I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you posted this.  It’s exactly what I needed to read today, and right at this moment!  Thank you so much for sharing all of this info with us, it gives me such hope and the strength to hold on.  I know it helps many others to see this is possible, to heal no matter what amount, length of time, method, etc.  what great news!  I search for these kinds of stories and when I find one, I devour it!  Feel free to post links to stories, too.  I hadn’t thought about doing that before now, but I will.  They are the beacon of light for us all!  Thank you again

Hi Uni  I'm glad you found it helpful, believe me  I know how you feel  At 6am I had to put a note through my neighbors door who I've only spoken to once for seconds  as I've not lived her long as they have screaming LOUD rows that echo through my home plus slamming every door in their flat while screaming at each other .

 

I had to move  here due  to new  neighbour  from hell moving in above me from my long term home where I'd lived for many year's 10 months ago and ended up unable to cope with withdrawal and tapering. I had to up-dose from 3.45mg to 10mg after going through year's of hell to get from 30mg of Diazepam plus CT's off 40mg of Temazepam a night and big doses of lots of other drugs which was upsetting enough after all that suffering in order to move .

 

Then  My new Doctor refused to allow me to taper at my own rate as my old one did and is pulling me off way too fast for the amount of year's and doses I was on and now I got this going on???    !@%^)?! Anyway I told them the truth in the note that I'm very unwell and coming off a long term prescribed drug and its horrific , and their rowing and noise is stressing me out big time   And that I'd rather have spoken to them than sent them a letter but I'm in too much agony to cope plus NO PROPER  SLEEP FOR AGES!  And I'm in agony I could barely write the note for the pain and shaking and told them that as well I just hope they can read the crappy writing . I did it all in big capitals anyway as I can't write properly so they should get the message OK.

 

Last week I had to crawl and knock their door as the dick head boyfriend decided it was a good idea to go drilling an hammering on the walls between us from 10pm until 11pm??  Wtf?  if I hadn't it would have gone on way later, that put me into an even worse wave for 3 days, plus their rowing is escalating everything I hope they take notice of the letter as I don't want the hassle of having to report them to the housing.  I can't cope with all that I had that over my other place it was hell withdrawing and official's back and fore all the time, and the police as well, so I am praying they have compassion  for other people and the effect their having not just on each other and their baby bit others .

 

 

Anyway here's one success story for starters  below, I find I have to have the head to deal with reading them at the right time as everything freaks me out most of the time but I know  that its the same for many others on here too, I wish everyone peace and speedy healing and the strength and tenacity to cope  with whatever we have to handle to be free well and happy again.

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

 

 

12 years of Xanax for sleep. No More, all better now!

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=166995.0;topicseen

 

Hi Nova ❤️

 

I’m so sorry you’re being triggered by so much stress in your external world.  You are one strong individual, physically and mentally.  I’m going to hold the intention in my heart for you that the neighbors will respect what you’ve written and have some compassion.  We need so much peace in our environment, which is not always possible, to undergo the chaos our bodies and minds are experincing in order to rebuild and rebalance us.  Ironically, I just had a situation with the next door neighbor to my home (which is 4 hours away from where we live because of my husband’s job).  We try to go there every weekend and I’m not always able to, but we did this past weekend.  The neighbor has been taking advantage of the fact we are not living there and plugging her phones and other things into my front porch electrical outlets.  It has been triggering me getting the alerts from my security cameras and seeing what she is doing.  Well, yesterday she waited until we left to head back to LA and within 5 minutes on the road I got an alert.  She walked around my house looking into the windows and then plugged in her phones.  We turned around and grabbed the phones, took them to the police station and showed them the recordings of what she’s been doing.  They took care of it and told us what to do should it happen again, so they can press charges.  It was distressing seeing someone on my property while I am away and I’m so glad it happened yesterday so we could do something about it.  It kicked my adrenaline into overdrive, which isn’t good for our nervous systems in WD, and I’m so glad I chose to go to the police instead of try to manage confronting her on my own.  Who knows what mess that could have created.  They are troublesome and have cops at their house a lot, so best to steer clear. 

 

I hope your circumstances improve so you get the peace you need and deserve, Nova.  I just wanted to share that I can elate on some level. 

 

Thank you for posting this success story!  I’m going to read it now.  Positives keep on coming! 

 

❤️

Good morning  my fellow warriors  Wow!! that's awful you  having a no good neighbour too stressing you why have most of us got to try cope with this lot and we got neighbor adding to the load lots of good posts om here I also think the term ''The morning bullies'' is a cool catch phrase Anyway letter to neighbors about the noise  didn't work , and  speaking to the other neighbors in the block ( there's 4 flats here) they were also super pissed off as they were being driven nuts by them too before I even moved in.

 

 

Wave or not I had to do SOMETHING as it was the catalyst for making me feel even worse plus I had no sleep for day's and the situation was playing on my brain in an endless loop. So it was door knocking time, I eventually ended up going there twice yesterday knowing I was going to pay for it later symptoms wise as I can't tolerate stress plus no sleep  for days.

 

I spent a brain rattling hour with ear plugs in as I got terrible hypersensitivity to sound as well as other senses    Talking to her first as the day before they spent 16 hours playing darts and the cavity walls turned the whole building into one giant amplifier, and me and the other neighbors have been going nuts trying to workout for ages what the noise was ALL hours for 10months . But I  eventually worked out what it was by the rhythm of the thuds and bangs, and politely explained it was an offense under 'Statutory nuisance'' under the noise pollution act and that they can be served a  notice if it carry's on. The crawled back in wave rising  hoping that was an end to it all. NO IT WAS NOT!!

 

 

Her dick head boy friend decided to start with the darts again so an hour later back I crawled and just as I got to their front door he was coming out and went bright red so I then told him quietly the trouble their going to be in if he don't listen and if he had a brain he would see I was trying to help them as well as myself otherwise its just going to cause them problems.

 

Well it worked he said thanks patted me on the shoulder and it stopped , and they were a lot quieter all day I just hope it lasts I then had to go se my other neighbor as he had a stroke year's ago and is in a wheel chair and never goes out to tell him I'd spoken to them and hopefully its been resolved properly now and any more of it everyone said the are going to report them so we agreed  if they kicked off again we're all complaining together as then the housing will act as its the whole block complaining.

 

I then crawled back home symptoms went into hyper drive and I spent the day laying down in agony, but it was worth it as I actually got some critically needed sleep last night YAY!! So although I feel crappy I am glad I dealt with it but I won't be doing that again in a hurry I can tell you how I did it I don't know but desperation and self preservation is a huge driving force I guess So although I felt rough I was glad I did it but I'm in no hurry to try it again no siree' Hoep everyone is as jiggy with it as can possibly be  Sending love and healing positive thoughts to you all

 

                                                                                         

 

 

                           

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten:

[[Bu...]]

hey. i figured out the clonazepam was making me sick because i would forget to take a dose in the morning and by 7-8 pm in the evening my muscles stopped spasming, my ears stopped ringing and i could urinate properly. it took me a few missed doses, over the course of a couple months, to realize it was the clonazepam that had been doing this the whole time (15 years and major symptoms starting in 2010).

 

so a year and a half ago is when i started going on the taper and i definitely felt better because my muscles stopped spasming as much. they were cold and rock hard with my shoulders and neck stuck forward and locked but they loosened up as my taper got lower. i even got down to 1/4 mg every 16 hours and I FELT SO GOOD! i was able to walk around instead of being bedridden with spasms for the first time in 8 years. so at least i now KNOW what the problem is, and that i can actually feel good again when this is over! I CAN'T WAIT!

 

edit: also wanted to add that i slept for 5 hours last night and that is a lot of sleep compared to what i have been getting so i feel pretty good today!

[[Ca...]]

Buck, what a great post, I may well relate to many here..!

Sorry it has been a long road for you though.. -a new life awaits..!!

 

[[no...]]

Hi all  the last 2 nights I took the lower of my daily dose at bedtime and slept better both nights I been suffering insomnia for weeks!!  Apart having to get up to wee and was able to go back to sleep, and I am going to continue this way  over the next few nights to see if its just I'm so exhausted I passed out and slept slept and its coincidence. Plus the last 2 night's the noisy neighbors have quietened right down since I spoke to them on Monday Or if its I'm actually having a paradoxical reaction to the Diazepam and that's whats keeping me awake. 

 

 

And I want to share with you that  I also remembered yesterday  that when I got down to 3.45mg before I had to up-dose to  10mg to physically enable me to to move  from the neighbor from hell, my sleep WAS better at the lower dose but I did get very occasional bad nights  but they passed in a few days or a week, but I had gone from zero sleep for a LONG time at the higher dose I'd go weeks at a time with no sleep totally exhausted  so it was a big step up.

 

Also my my Toxic sleep which I have now and had for many year's before I got lower down in dose not knowing what it was stopped completely I was able to take a nap in the day and wake up without feeling like hell, and still sleep at night. I could handle stress better, I felt reconnected to my spirit again which gave me back the ability to rise above the worst symptoms with total acceptance and feel more at peace, and my anxiety stop I now have it again.

 

 

And although I was symptomatic I could cope with stress normally I mean symptoms or not my stress coping ability returned to what it was when I was pre-benzo I could deal with what life threw up and not go into a hopeless panicking melt down or a huge increase in symptoms like I do now at practically nothing and everything.  Normally I'm a deal with it then forget about it and carry on with the day type of person, as easy as  water off a ducks back but not now.

 

They may have  been other symptoms that improved I can't remember as I said it only came back to me yesterday but I know partial windows came more often as well. So yes you CAN have improvements as you get lower I just hope I get that lucky this time around too as I got symptoms I didn't have or were not as bad before having to up-dose by force not choice and my new GP is a mean S.OB who won't allow me to taper at my rate like my old Doctors.

 

A nd I have to get my prescription every week not once a month by delivery as I can't go collect it, as I have done for many many year's  did but I'm trying not to let that get to me too much easier said than done as its stressful . But hopefully I will still get relief this time around as I get lower . The fact that taking my smaller dose as my last dose in the evening as actually given me sleep has put some more hope into the picture so I'm going to see if I still sleep better the next few nights at the lower dose to see if its thanks to the lower dose or if its just a fluke.

 

 

Love Nova xxx :smitten: