It's me again! Help with Plan - 19 years on X tapering from 5 mgs

[[Su...]]

Kristen  and all others on This thread, OMG so I'm not the only one that couldn't crossover to Valium !! Spent one month carefully crossing over and it was too toxic for me.......so back to Xanax tapering. From 2.5 MG down to.75 MG now in a brutal hellish 6 months, so far taper per Ashton. I micro dry cut every day with a scale the equivalent on the high end of Ashton protocol of 10% every 2 weeks. Micro cutting is much less painful! I tried water tapering but as with some, my body didn't recognize the drug once dissolved. I am hopeful we will all survive this and get our lives back. Yes, too many sad stories will make it worse, but to find others on our situation is helpful. I do understand tapering x is much harder than the long acting, I have to stay functional to work, as I have my own business. Some times it's so hard I don't want to go on, but I must because we will all get better, right? Hang on, hang on we can do this.🤗

 

Hi Simon,

Yes Valium is a bummer -- at least for some of us....

I was really caught by the phrase you used of "Water tapering"  It might be just what you were trying to say with a liquid titration -- but Xanax does not dissolve in water (yes the tablets do but the medicine is not distributed throughout the solution) so if that's what you were doing - you may want to try again with a true liquid titration. The Xanax needs to be dissolved in  either a small amount of alcohol, our other solution.  There is lots of info on the forum about this if you need it...

I use part pills part liquid and it works well for me.

Just wanting to make sure i read you right -- and that you were using a method that can be helpful. ...

The Best to you!

SS

[[Bn...]]

No. I didn’t get the chance to cross to Valium. It’s ok. I’ve read enough negative stories about it. So I’m ok. I’m still tapering. I cut under 10%. And haven’t had a ton of symptoms mi was cutting weekly. Changed it to 10 days a couple of times for convenience but I’m not feeling to terrible. I hope it’s ok to keep going. I held for 10 days and was completely fine. So this tie, I cut after one week.

 

I still don’t think I can deal with titration. Lack of brain power. As long as my doctor continues to give me smaller pills. I should be ok.

 

Lori. How are you?

 

Seakingpeace you are awesome. Great job.

 

I did do therapy before deciding to get off my Xanax. I spent 3 hours a week for almost a year. I resolved a ton. Not depressed. Excited to LIVE.

[[Lo...]]

No. I didn’t get the chance to cross to Valium. It’s ok. I’ve read enough negative stories about it. So I’m ok. I’m still tapering. I cut under 10%. And haven’t had a ton of symptoms mi was cutting weekly. Changed it to 10 days a couple of times for convenience but I’m not feeling to terrible. I hope it’s ok to keep going. I held for 10 days and was completely fine. So this tie, I cut after one week.

 

I still don’t think I can deal with titration. Lack of brain power. As long as my doctor continues to give me smaller pills. I should be ok.

 

Lori. How are you?

 

Seakingpeace you are awesome. Great job.

 

I did do therapy before deciding to get off my Xanax. I spent 3 hours a week for almost a year. I resolved a ton. Not depressed. Excited to LIVE.

 

Hi Kristin!

So happy to hear that you're doing so well!  Way to go!  I told you that I had every confidence in you! 

Thanks for asking about my progress!  As of today, I did another cut.  Down to 4 mg.  Well, I'm vacillating some days from 4.25 to 4.0 but I haven't been on this low of a dose in 3 years so it's encouraging.  My only side effects are occasional insomnia (like right now)!   

 

Today I spent 4 hours on the phone with my doctor, pharmacy, and insurance company trying to get off the horrible generic brand that my pharmacy of 15 years switched to.  They are literally impossible to cut even with a pill cutter, razor, knife, etc.  I'll find out tomorrow if my insurance will okay a mail order to go back to the brand I had been on for over 15 years as it treated me well, easier to cut (not a thick coating), etc.  Fingers crossed.

 

Hope all are doing well!  Please let's keep this thread going as there are not many of us in the long-term, high dose situation! 

 

Best to all!

 

Lori 

[[Bn...]]

Lori

 

That’s great 4mgs. Awesome. Keep going. Me too. I haven’t been on this low of a dose for over 12 years. I’m at 3.25 today. Next cut Monday. Doing ok.

 

Would love to hear how things are going.

 

Kristin

[[Bn...]]

How are you doing Lori?  How are the cuts feeling. Would love to hear from you.

 

I’m at 3 mgs. I fell it.

 

Kristin

[[Jo...]]

Hi fellow Xanax users

 

I am here too. Very new but driven to get off this thing. I’m on no other meds and I actually was quite ignorant to the taper ways. I’ve been researching for several weeks now. Began taper last month. Down to 5.25mgs from 6mgs.  I want off but I want to be safe. I’ve read Ashton. If any of you have fscebook let me know. I am on some of those pages and I want to delete most of them. But I need people. Just a few to get me through. I’ve done my head work. Or gotten a jump on it. I realize that it’s possible many of my issues could be from Xanax use long term. So I still see my therapist while I taper.

 

Can’t wait to celebrate being off. Even thought that seems so far away. Anyone want to share their plan who came off a high dose of just Xanax no cross? 

 

Thanks

Kristin

 

Kristen you have done an amazing thing. Keep thinking positive!  We will heal and come out of this tunnel! :smitten:

[[Bn...]]

Thanks!  I promised myself I won't updose, at this point I am sitting at 2.75 mgs and I am so happy with that but cannot wait to be done.  I am doing kinda rapid but handling it pretty well knowing at any time my pace may be interrupted by my body.  We shall see, so far when my cuts hit I feel ok within 3 days of hit day.  When the cut hits I always say, "this time I  am holding" then 2 days later I  feel  so okay but "on hold" so I continue my aggressive  taper,  as  long as  my body says its okay.  I have a trip in  June and I have a couple of  things going on in June that require my brain so I  know I  will hold then and give my body a break.  This stuff is crazy huh!  I am amazed that I have been on this as  long as I have.  Crazy

 

Good Luck

Kristin

[[Jo...]]

I miss the old me too. I have to persevere.  The heart blips are a freak out. I try to stay away from the super scary posts. At this stage, they set off huge adrenaline dumps. I have to hang tough and I wish you all so much luck in purging Xanax from your life. It has cost me plenty.

[[Lo...]]

Sorry I've been MIA.  It's been a rough month with family issues and health issues which put my taper on hold and left me ridiculously depressed!  I'm glad that I logged on tonight because your stories helped.  I'm still trying to adjust to the 4 mgs.  I think my stress level is really affecting my ability to cut further.  However, I'm now dosing .5 mgs at a time throughout the day with a 1 mg at night before bed which seems to be helping me at least get some sleep!  I wish I had more of a support system at home but I remain determined. 

 

Kristin, I'm so incredibly happy for you that you've had a pretty smooth taper thus far!  You sounded so scared in the beginning but look at you now!  You're on 1/2 of your starting dose!  I have to admit that I'm a bit envious!   

 

I'll keep you all posted.  In the meantime, I have to find a way to get rid of this health anxiety!  I'm obsessing and I know it's just making things a million times worse!  Any suggestions? 

 

Best of luck to all!  I know it my heart that we CAN and WILL do this!

 

Fondly,

Lori

 

 

[[Lo...]]

Kristen  and all others on This thread, OMG so I'm not the only one that couldn't crossover to Valium !! Spent one month carefully crossing over and it was too toxic for me.......so back to Xanax tapering. From 2.5 MG down to.75 MG now in a brutal hellish 6 months, so far taper per Ashton. I micro dry cut every day with a scale the equivalent on the high end of Ashton protocol of 10% every 2 weeks. Micro cutting is much less painful! I tried water tapering but as with some, my body didn't recognize the drug once dissolved. I am hopeful we will all survive this and get our lives back. Yes, too many sad stories will make it worse, but to find others on our situation is helpful. I do understand tapering x is much harder than the long acting, I have to stay functional to work, as I have my own business. Some times it's so hard I don't want to go on, but I must because we will all get better, right? Hang on, hang on we can do this.🤗

 

Hi Simon,

Yes Valium is a bummer -- at least for some of us....

I was really caught by the phrase you used of "Water tapering"  It might be just what you were trying to say with a liquid titration -- but Xanax does not dissolve in water (yes the tablets do but the medicine is not distributed throughout the solution) so if that's what you were doing - you may want to try again with a true liquid titration. The Xanax needs to be dissolved in  either a small amount of alcohol, our other solution.  There is lots of info on the forum about this if you need it...

I use part pills part liquid and it works well for me.

Just wanting to make sure i read you right -- and that you were using a method that can be helpful. ...

The Best to you!

SS

 

SS so happy to hear that you're feeling well!  You're almost there!  I also had a horrible time with V!  It's what ultimately postponed by taper.  I was all geared up, doctor on board, to follow Ashton and had a terrible paradoxical reaction to V!  I was so upset because I had invested so much time in Ashton... Sitting down with my family and telling them what I was doing, giving them the taper schedule, information on what to expect, how to support, my doctors phone number, ... the list goes on so that in case I ever became ill or had to be hospitalized, they would know where I was in my taper.  That's how determined I was.  I won't bore you with anymore. 

 

So here I am, back again, doing a dry cut.  Kristin seems to be doing quite well!  I'm so happy for you both.  I will keep logging on in the future to post progress.  Thanks for continuing to post your progress log.  It gives me hope!

 

Best to all!

 

Lori

[[Su...]]

Hi Lori,

Thanks for this post.

Yes I am at Day 64 of a long hold and remember what it feels like to be a human. 

Whew.  I know that I need to start with the liquid taper again soon, but really my thinking about this whole thing has shifted.

 

  I can't have another year like last year (I simply too old for that  ) Not being ageist here, but being realistic about the idea that there may be other health issues that crop up.  This one I have some control over.

 

So I  will continue to taper and hold -- making sure that, for the most part, I am functional. 

It's fun to have some fun!  Even though my ability to socialize is limited and my ability to deal with stress is less.

It means I may be tapering for years -- but it also means that the taper is not foremost in my thinking or life.

Seems doable from this vantage point.

I hope that you are doing well!

Again thanks for answering my post

:smitten:

SS

[[Lo...]]

Welcome back to the board. I have dry cut from 6mg to just under 1mg in the past 10 or 11 months. It has not been horrible. Sure some days are tougher than others but that is normal life even if you are not cutting. It may be another six months before I am free from Xanax. I am not going to put a date on, when it’s time it will happen.

 

Cutting small doses almost weekly has been what worked for me. I hope to continue to do that with this last mg.

 

Wishing you strength in your journey, you can do this 🙂

 

SeakiningPeace,

Just checking in to see how you're doing?  You appeared to be close to the finish line.  Praying that all is still going smoothly!  Please keep us posted.

 

Sending good thoughts!

 

Fondly,

Lori

[[Se...]]

Slowly getting there. Held for almost a month, cut .0625 last week and feel pretty good. Plan on moving forward with .0625 cuts every two weeks or so as long as I still feel good. Difficult for me to dry cut them accurately much smaller than that.

 

Eager but afraid at the same time to be free of Xanax.

[[Bn...]]

That is awesome and encouraging. Keep in touch.

Kristin

[[Lo...]]

Slowly getting there. Held for almost a month, cut .0625 last week and feel pretty good. Plan on moving forward with .0625 cuts every two weeks or so as long as I still feel good. Difficult for me to dry cut them accurately much smaller than that.

 

Eager but afraid at the same time to be free of Xanax.

 

I know this is easier said than done... but... try with every ounce of your being to put FEAR behind you!  You come so far that it's literally remarkable!  Celebrate your incredible successes in this journey.  Concentrate on how far you have come from this horrible drug!  You've been so inspirational and did a slow taper which as we've all read is considered the best way to to go.  I'm keeping good thoughts and wishing you peace and healing!  Please keep us posted!   

 

Lori

[[Bn...]]

Seakingpeace1

 

I am rooting for you. You are so close. Keep going hold as needed. Please post when you decide to jump. I think you are very good at giving your body grace.  Good luck.

 

Kristin

[[Se...]]

Thank you both, no jumping for me yet. Did a cut a few days ago and really feeling it. I had a great window last week felt better than I have in years. These past few days have been rough.  I know this will pass, I am so eager to just be done with this but these tiny doses are harder than the big ones. Guess I will just keep spacing it out and see what happens.

 

Hope everyone is doing good

[[Bn...]]

How is everyone?  I’m planning my next cut Friday.25. Lact time I think. I will see.

 

Thanks.

Kristin

[[Lo...]]

Thank you both, no jumping for me yet. Did a cut a few days ago and really feeling it. I had a great window last week felt better than I have in years. These past few days have been rough.  I know this will pass, I am so eager to just be done with this but these tiny doses are harder than the big ones. Guess I will just keep spacing it out and see what happens.

 

Hope everyone is doing good

Hang in there!  I'm so impressed with your progress!  As I keep saying.... you give me hope!  I'm struggling with my next cut!  I can't do math to save my life even with a gram scale which incidentally is more confusing to me than biting these crazy pills in half!  I know that I have to cut next week and I'm terrified!  I have not been below 4 mgs. in almost 10 years (not that I looked at my signature and have a clue))!  Honestly, I think I'm too afraid to look.  Sometimes just knowing can bring on anxiety!  Here's to praying that I can do this!  So many health issues came up within the past 3 months as well as family issues that it's been overwhelming.  At this point I'm just happy that I haven't updosed at all!  Talk about little successes!  UGH!

 

I'm sure that cutting .25 mgs. will probably be too much.  Any suggestions?  This just plain sucks! 

 

Lori

[[Lo...]]

How is everyone?  I’m planning my next cut Friday.25. Lact time I think. I will see.

 

Thanks.

Kristin

 

Kristin, I have no idea how you're doing this!  I mean that in a positive way!  I applaud you and am inspired.  I think my health issues and personal issues have held me back.  I'm terrified to do the next cut!  However, I really have no choice.  Isolation and zero support have been a problem.  Ironically, for as much as I have an issue with leaving the house, I find that I tend to feel much better when I do!  Hmm.... the therapist in me says, "GET OUT OF THE HOUSE"!  However, mornings are my toughest times.  Hence, by the time the afternoon rolls around and I have to start worrying about making dinner, getting some work done, etc., I end up in my pajamas.  I'm actually missing my nieces bacheolorette party in Las Vegas this weekend due to fears over this taper!  Not making me feel better!  But hey, we promised, Vegas... Here we come once we're over this!  I'm  holding you to it!  XO   

 

Health anxiety is through the roof though!  Let's pray I live to see the REAL me come back again! 

 

Lori

[[Tr...]]

Hi, I have been reading this thread and am so impressed with Kristen. I have been on x for 25 yrs. 3 mgs a day. I self tapered a few yrs. Ago to 2 mgs. A day with no problem. I cut .25 out every two weeks. I stayed there and just as of last month may 24th  my Dr said I had to come off x ! I was surprised since he always told me I would have to stay on forever! Horrible Dr never really knew how to take me off that's why I think he kept me on them for p panic/anxiety. Anyway I cut.25 the very next day after seeing him went through horrible withdraw shaking, insomnia, crying, no appetite but he gave me 8 wks to get off them! So after 20 days I cut .25 again and I feel beyond horrible..it'll be two weeks in a couple days since the last cut and now I'm afraid to cut sin feeling this bad! Any advice from you ladies..I'm desperate. I am currently at 1.5 mgs a day and am fearful I won't have courage to cut again bc of how bad I feel. I'm also 55 with an a heart arrythmia that's acting up since I started taper (

 

Trishy

[[Bn...]]

Lori. Been lucky so far. Couple of cuts have been hard. I get through it. I did hold before my last cut which helped. Went on a road trip. My brain is way more clear than before. But I feel the Xanax. The lack of it.

 

I’m going to cut .25 again this Friday.

 

Trisha - I wonder if you can maybe consider instead of .25 mgs cut. Can you just do half of the quarter?  Perhaps it wouldn’t be so hard on your body. See seakingpeace. She should be in this string somewhere. She is cutting smaller doses now.

 

Good luck everyone. Love the updates.

 

Kristin

[[Tr...]]

Thank you Kristen that's good advice. This is a such a battle..

 

Trish

[[Lo...]]

Hi, I have been reading this thread and am so impressed with Kristen. I have been on x for 25 yrs. 3 mgs a day. I self tapered a few yrs. Ago to 2 mgs. A day with no problem. I cut .25 out every two weeks. I stayed there and just as of last month may 24th  my Dr said I had to come off x ! I was surprised since he always told me I would have to stay on forever! Horrible Dr never really knew how to take me off that's why I think he kept me on them for p panic/anxiety. Anyway I cut.25 the very next day after seeing him went through horrible withdraw shaking, insomnia, crying, no appetite but he gave me 8 wks to get off them! So after 20 days I cut .25 again and I feel beyond horrible..it'll be two weeks in a couple days since the last cut and now I'm afraid to cut sin feeling this bad! Any advice from you ladies..I'm desperate. I am currently at 1.5 mgs a day and am fearful I won't have courage to cut again bc of how bad I feel. I'm also 55 with an a heart arrythmia that's acting up since I started taper (

 

Trishy

 

Hi Trishy!  Welcome to the thread!

 

I'm so sorry to hear that your doctor, who has prescribed X to you for 25 years is forcing you to get off them so quickly.  Quite frankly, this is unethical!  Have you contacted him to let him know how terrible you feel?  Also, it might be a good idea to show him some of these threads.  I would take him seakingpeace's schedule and adamantly say, "This is how it's supposed to be done... slow and steady with holds when necessary"! 

 

In the meantime, I agree with Kristin about halving the .25 mgs.  Can you try to half them and maybe take them at shorter intervals?  I know, easier said than done when you only have a limited supply left.  Again, totally unethical on the part of your doctor. 

 

Please keep us posted on how you're doing!  We're here for you!  Rule of thumb seems to be 10% cuts every two weeks.  Less if you can handle it but what he's forcing you to do seems barbaric!

 

I wish I could be of more help with ideas.  Again, keep us posted.

 

Hugs to you!

 

Lori

[[Tr...]]

Hi Lori,

 

Thanks for the welcome and the support!,

 

I'll catch you up..I have a new Dr who is willing to work at my comfort zone ,however, I feel like he might have a deadline for when I should be off too.

 

I am looking into a psychiatrist to see if she will be more flexible with my taper.

 

So far now I'm holding at 1.5 mg and I'm just staying to feel a bit better from last cut which was about 16 days ago..it was ROUGH ..I thought I was going to literally die.

 

So happy to have BB' s it's been so helpful to talk with people who understand! Thanks for those hugs!!

 

All the best!

 

Trish