Post Benzo Freedom Withdrawal Support Group

[[Re...]]

Hey Matteo,

 

    Just one more hurdle to jump...this one is just a tad bit higher but you can clear it, and your fellow BBs are on the sidelines cheering you along!

 

    As I encourage you, I encourage myself.  You are in my prayers!  Stay the course!     

[[Am...]]

Just wanted to share what a beautiful window I am having tonight!

 

I feel energetic and happy like I remeber from the "before" time.

 

Just wish I could somehow let that feeling out more...what positive thing could I do?? haha

 

 

I will probably just eat and take a bath and watch a movie. I know it seems little but it sounds so hugely rewarding to me right now!

 

:laugh:

[[le...]]

Hooray Amber!  It is wonderful to hear your report and we rejoice with you for this happy moment...and hope there will be more just around the corner !

 

~Leena

[[Am...]]

thank you so much!

[[Me...]]

Been working out at the gym and walk/runnning too    I think it is making me feel better..at first it was hard with lots of dizzies..but as I stuck with it ..it has became better and better      I remembr when I could not drive !!~ Or go and get my hair or nails done...or got to a school meeting.....I am so much better now !! Still not fully symptom free..but they are WAY better than even 2 months back !!!!  Hang in there every one   I was a walking disaster B4!!      Will be 6 months on the 30th !! 

[[...]]

Hey Mel!!!!

 

So pleased to hear you are doing good missy...it is really encouraging for us to hear when stuck in a wave of symptoms...I have had the dizzies the past few days which is weird cos I haven't really had them before - they suck!!!!

 

I am currently at 3.5 months out and still a bit of a mess but after reading your update I feel more positive about the future ahead again...sometimes I think the progress with this is so damn slow it is hard to notice...

 

Keep truckin.

 

Mxxx

[[ve...]]

Hey Mel. Right behind ya at 4 months tomorrow .  I am driving but find myself asking my wife to drive back after a long day trip (or even a short one ) so fatigue is a factor still.  Seem to have a bit of ocd/anxiety cropping up here and there too MAA, so its probably pretty normal.  Congrats Amber on the window. May we all have windows forthcoming . Hope you're hanging in there Matteo.

 

Best,

 

V (no more)

[[...]]

Amber & Mel...Thanks for the encouragement!  Glad to hear when people are doing well. 

Helps us to keep putting one foot in front of the other one every day. 

And thanks for continuing to post your progress.

 

Vertigo...I hear you on the fatigue.  Really a problem right now. 

Tried to do some yard work last nite and I am paying for it today.

Hoping for a reprieve soon.

 

Have a great day! 

-David

[[pa...]]

Hi everyone!

I've not been a member of the website very long. I just discovered this post and I think it's great. I've been Benzo free for over 3 weeks now (since February 16). I continue to have symptoms that come and go. The funny thing about the way these go is that when I'm feeling free of symptoms my mind tends to forget about the problems I've been through. It's like it's saying "What Benzo problem? I didn't know you had one?". Then there are the other times when nerve tingling, hot flashes, muscle aches, chronic pain, heart palpatations, etc. come back and my mind says "here it comes again, now I remember." This may sound strange, it seems to be part of my condition. Anyone else have feelings like this? Also, I seem to be very vulnerable to stress. I recently resigned from a job back in January. This was not an easy thing for me to do. I am married and I have two children to support. Fortunately, my wife is working right now, or I don't know what I'd do. I'm currently applying for part-time work. I don't feel ready to tackle full-time yet. I sometimes find myself losing my temper and I can be quite vocal at times. I don't recall being this way before and I'm not sure if this is another symptom or a reaction to all the boatloads of stress I've gone through in the last 3 years.

I currently take small amounts of Mirtazapine. I have been on this med for 3 1/2 years now. I may decide to w/d from this later. Anyway, glad I found this post. Would be glad to continue sharing my experiences and hearing from others about theirs.

Pangelingua

[[...]]

Welcome Pangelingua :)  And well done for beating the benzo beast, I too am on 15mg mirtazapine and will look at tapering that at the end of the year, it still knocks me out to sleep for 7 or so hours every night so I am in no hurry to lose that just yet...

 

Just so all my BB's know that I don't only post when I am feeling crappy, I wanted to share that after a week of awful symptoms this afternoon I am having a wonderful window and I want to spread it round to you all... :yippee:  Not symptom free but not enough of them to stop me smiling....my daughter has been practising her piano and I haven't felt like screaming for her to be quiet so that is progress and will do for me for now...

 

Keep posting guys, this thread is awesome.

 

Wishing windows all round.

 

Mxxxxx

[[Li...]]

Hi,

Just wanted to reply real quick and say hi to Mel!  I am so happy to hear you are doing well!!!!  That is so great!  And so happy to hear you are at the gym...our little dizzy lizzy is getting better!! :yippee:

 

MAA, so glad you are having a window!  I hope it stays forever and the benzo beast never returns!!! :smitten:

 

I am 9 months off and I feel really good.  This week we have had sun and it has made me feel even better.  Lighter and happier.  I was even jumping around on the bed last night with my baby and laughing.  So things are good and we all heal from this.  Keep on keeping on! :)

[[...]]

livie,

Thank you, thank you, thank you.!

I don't think I have smiled all day, and I am smiling just thinking about you jumping on the bed with your baby!

It reminds me of the old me, so it kind of makes me sad too, but thanks again.  Keep it coming when you have time.

 

Pan,

I often feel symptoms like yours.  They sound very much like others I read about here at BB as well.

Stress, anxiety and fatigue are my big ticket items right now. 

I am somewhat irritable at times also, and I know this is very typical.

However, as difficult as our problems are currently, I know there are many, many more people suffering far worse.

I guess you have to keep it in perspective.  Have a good day!

 

MAA,

Wonderful to hear you are feel well. 

The piano thing reminded me of when my daughter took piano (pre-benzo) and I never

remember having a problem. 

It would certainly be more of an issue now for me...so I am happy for you.

-David

[[...]]

Pangelingua - irritability, anxiousness and inability to concentrate still linger with me.  My ever tolerant husband has really taken a battering through this whole process.  I thought I was over most of this and just a few weeks ago got slammed with a reminder that I'm not done yet.  I am still going through the stage of disbelief that this is the drug doing this to me still, but this thread is slowly convincing me that it probably is.

 

Still on we go, getting slowly better and better.

 

Livie, I'm so happy for you that life is good again.  I know that I too will get there, but I'm not known for my patience, I want to be well now.

[[le...]]

Hello Buddies,

 

Gee, isn't it great to have some posts of people feeling windows or well?   Those of us in the throes of massive waves sure need to hear your reports!  Thank you!

 

Pan...I am SO glad you mentioned that feeling you have of not remembering from wave to window or window to wave.  This has been very noticeable to me and I find myself very incredulous about it.  I have no idea WHY it is that way, but I am glad to hear someone else express this.  I have wanted to but didn't know if I could express it in a way that made sense to anyone.  I understood YOU perfectly!  Yes, I feel just like that.

 

I have something very strange to report.  I had mentioned that my "knee" (the area above and around it) on my left leg had gotten suddenly swollen at the end of last week.  I decided I would just wait to see if it would go away before I saw a doctor about it.  Well, yesterday was about the "waviest" day I have had so far in my withdrawals.  It wasn't just my knee...but it was legs, hips, area behind my shoulder blades, chest and neck, and my piriformis muscle on the left side.  And of course, the skin and tissue burning, burning, burning feeling.  I felt like I was dying.  I finally called to make a doctor appt. about my knee and he was able to work me in for the next day (which was today).

 

Right before bed last night, the leg pain became different than it has been.  It actually felt like the same pain I got in that leg just before I got shingles just over a year ago.  THAT leg pain, last year, sent me to the emergency room as I was scared I had a blood clot or something.  I  ended up (last night) taking 400mg. of neurontin to calm the burning and to help with the new pain so I could try to get some sleep. ( I sleep VERY little.) I knew I would probably have a price to pay in terms of a set-back as a result of taking neurontin...but I had just reached my limit. 

 

I DID sleep, as I don't remember tossing all night to get my legs and neck comfortable.  And actually, I overslept (which is unheard of for me during these withdrawal days).  But the weird thing was, the swelling in my knee had gone down considerably.  (This is after days of it growing worse).  I expected that I would FEEL better because of having taking the neurontin...but I did NOT expect for the swelling in my knee to go down.  There was a little bit of a "bummer factor" in that I had made the doctor appt to show my swollen knee to him to see if he could tell me what it was...and now it wasn't as swollen as it was before bed last night.

 

My question is this: IF this swelling was somehow related to withdrawal from the klonopin, does it make since that taking a dose of neurontin could make the swelling go down?  I know this is not a typical thing that neurontin would do.  But in this case...if the swelling was a withdrawal symptom...and I added something into my body that affects GABA receptors...could that something (the neurontin) cause the swelling to go down?  I know you guys aren't doctors and I won't take what you say as medical advice.  I am just really curious.

 

My other question is....knowing that ideally it is best for me NOT to take neurontin due to the GABA factor...do you think that any time I do this (even if it is only once or twice a month) it sets me back to zero in terms of recovery?  Is taking neurontin as "bad" as taking a benzo?  (I hesitate to ask this because of our friend Gayle...Gayle, if you read this please understand my case is TOTALLY different from yours!!!!)

 

I went ahead to see the doctor...and what he surmised is that it had to do with the bursa in that area (bursitis). He said it could be that it just resolved itself...he didn't totally discount the neurontin thing, though he said it wouldn't be typical.  (It isn't resolved because it seems to be coming back).

 

I know it is a mystery, but I am very interested to hear what any of you might think. 

 

Thank you!

 

~Leena

 

[[mi...]]

Leena, do you think the extra sleep might have helped? If the swelling is actually caused by an injury of some kind, the extra rest and not walking on it was probably a good thing. I'm no doctor, but that makes sense to me. What do you think?

[[le...]]

Hello Midsummer...It would make sense if it was due to an injury...but there was no injury (my injury last March did not damage my legs).  My legs have been hurting so much in withdrawal, particularly my knees (again, the tissue surrounding my knees...it is not joint related).  This swelling is the first VISIBLE sign of this pain.

 

I suppose getting sleep COULD help.  I know we need sleep in order for our bodies to repair.  Which leads to another question:  How can we all heal when we can't sleep?

 

Leena

[[mi...]]

I just did a quick search on bursitis, and it seems to be the most common result for knee swelling with no injury. Whatever it is, the extra rest seemed to help. And yes, I agree: Those of us in the throes of w/d have it doubly hard. Sleep is good for the body, and helps with healing and w/d symptoms, but we can't sleep properly because of w/d! A paradox, indeed. I hope you get some relief soon.

[[ve...]]

Good point LB.  Our spouses/partners deserve a medal for what we've put them through.  Hopefully we can express our gratitude now that there's no little pill to mask our feelings and make us walking zombies .  Leena, in looking over your signature, it seems quite possible that your muscle and knee pains could be related to withdrawal off not only the klon but neurontin, though I'm not a doc.  Did you c/t off neurontin or taper that too?  Hopefully time will heal and I agree with Midsummer, sleep and rest would be welcome too!  No doubt stress does play a big factor Pangelingua.  An interesting book on dealing with stress and chronic pain is "Full Catastrophe Living" by Jon Kabat-Zinn.   Great to hear that you can enjoy the baby benzo free and on the mend now Liv.  Four months off for me today, feeling pretty good today .

 

Best,

 

Vertigo (no more)

[[af...]]

Im back in a rough spot this week, with the nerve pain and burning waxing and waning. My feet sting and and my body feels like its overheated. Im a buzzin, sparklin, live wire, and Im struggling to find a way to switch off the current. But, hey, Im 4+ months Klon-free now, so this must mean something, right?

Has anybody suffered this kind of pain at this stage, and when did things improve for them. What can i take for pain? Any medication to consider? Just need a bit of support. Love u all...

 

Kev

[[Me...]]

Put fluoride on 15 4 yr olds in  an hour      It was all good...but now since I left I have been having my big huge window come down   Got real tense and burning in back....then now at home I am all off kiltered and cant focus...so strange..hadnt felt like this in a god while....so I am with LB...I am still not fully healed.....TIME is what it must take ....and PATIENCE        Maybe I need to hit the treadmill       I wonder what makes us get slammed on some days   Well..I am off to pick up kids early from school then driving to Houston ....

[[...]]

leena,

They say these drugs pick on our weak spots...maybe so... and as we get older, we tend to get more weak spots. 

(Ha-Ha).....................I know... it's not that funny when you're hurting).

 

I think bursitis type problems do pick up for little reason other than our joints begin to show the effects of time.

My father-in-law was also plagued with it, for no apparent reason.

I hope you are feeling better soon.

-David

[[ve...]]

Way to go Mel   Benzo withdrawal or not, 15 four year olds would be enough to drive anyone batty after an hour .  You done good kid .  Safe travels.

 

Onward!

 

V

[[ca...]]

Kev

 

Had the tingling mild and off and on for first 8 months then 9 months to present got worse and more frequent. Also some numbness in arms with a feeling of weakness.

[[ve...]]

The Ashton Manual I believe lists numbness, vibrations, tingling and burning sensations as possible symptoms of protracted withdrawal.   Many of these symptoms can go away in 6 months to a year, sometimes sooner,  if I recall Ashton's writings. Hang in there Catfish, Kev, Hope, Afteru and anyone with these similar s/x.

 

 

[[af...]]

Hi Catfish, Vertigo

Today is a better day. The nerve pain and burning has subsided enough for me to function. Thanks for the encouraging replies. Indeed, TIME is our ultimate healer, if God wills it.

Kev