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@KNACKERED

A blog by [kn...] in Member Blogs

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About this blog

Narratives derived from personal experiences while tapering benzos.  Real life scenarios instilled with satire, humor, and a 'different and interesting way of looking at things.  

Entries in this blog

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Knackered Shows Up with Benzos

Knackered ‘Shows Up’ with Benzos   Hey there.  Knackered here.  Woody Allen is famous for his take on life.  Probably his most appropriate quote for our purposes here is, “The most important thing in life is just showing up”.  Sounds easy until you really attempt it.  Of course, this implies that you’re out of  bed (not the easiest thing to accomplish for a lot of us).  But, it’s also quite likely that you’re already nowhere near the bedroom, having had another sleepless night. Pa
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Knackered Searches the Path with Benzos

Knackered Searches the Path with Benzos      Hey there, Knackered here.  Probably the most frustrating thing about this intrepid path we’ve chosen to follow is that we never really know where we’re at, where  the next pitfalls are, or if and when we’ll arrive safely.  An ancient Chinese proverb suggests that “A good traveler has no set schedule and doesn’t care about his/her arrival time”. That probably suited the era at the time, but would wreak havoc on our mental state nowadays.  Th
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Knackerd's Techno Goes Viral with Benzo

Knackered’s Techno Goes Viral with Benzos    Hey there, @[kn...] here.  It was a dark and stormy night.  The only light emanating into the room was from soft moonlight coming from a galactic orb in the sky.  Inside, Knackered crept carefully to the table and made for the chair.  An air of mystery was like a presence lurking about.  Carefully the laptop cover squeaked open.  He sat back, considering his options and without hesitation moved to quickly boot up.  A gasp can be heard as realizat
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Knackered Sorts His Marbles with Benzos

Knackered Sorts His Marbles with Benzos     I glanced at the calendar as I came down the hallway this morning and what I saw made my legs tremble more than they usually do at this time of the day.  It’s bad enough that the whole week starts with April Fools’ Day.  But, penciled in was a hamster wheel of stuff, none of which I really wanted to deal with.  My therapy appointment on Wednesday would be no big deal.  She seems to be the only one in the mental health department who likes me any m
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Knackered is Home Alone with Benzos

Knackered is Home Alone with Benzos    Hey there, Knackered here.  Excuse me for a moment while I pause a bit and see ‘what condition my condition is in’(Rock song by First Addition circa ’67).  Breathing is a killer right now and the legs feel like jello.  Just rolled in from an airport run. Upon return, I installed the auto in the garage and staggered inside.  I dropped my wife off and got to come home.  Round trip is about 90 miles, which is about 85 more than I’m capable of.  The freewa
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Knackered Looks for Hope Among Benzos

Knackered Looks for Hope Among Benzos    Hey there. Knackered here. We spent most of the morning today running around town and dropping off gifts at my wife’s friends.  I really don’t have many left unless I count you guys.  That means a lot to me.  My wife doesn’t buy stuff for any of these people.  It’s all churned up out of the pottery studio in the basement and our own kitchen.  She’s done this kind of thing for years.  The local newspaper even did a feature article on it once.    
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Knackered Zooms with benzos

Knackered Zooms with Benzos    Hey there, Knackered here. Getting in to see the Dr. used to be an all day commitment.  I can remember times when my mother would take snacks, books and allow us to bring along some small toy we were currently jonesing for and spending all morning gazing at the fish tank.  My brother and I often tried out our wrestling moves on the carpet in the children’s corner.  As long we didn’t mess with the other folks waiting, she left us alone.  I remember the standard
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Knackered in the Dark with Benzos

Knackered in the Dark with Benzos    If we’re really honest with ourselves, most of us can attest to the fact that, at this time, we’re not the sharpest tool in the garden shed.  In fact, total awareness, full cognition, acute sensibility and the like expired about the time we hit the halfway point on our taper.  Yes, if you’ve got the bucks and the wherewithal to find them, you can attend online courses in everything from positive thinking to weight loss through power eating.  Yes, multi t
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Knackered Steps Out with Benzos

Knackered Steps Out with Benzos    Hey there, Knackered here.  If we’re honest about it, most of us really don’t want to go anywhere.  Left alone, we’re perfectly happy to roam the same household route every day: bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen.  Not always in the same order, mind you.  Sometimes it’s nice to change it up, just for variety sake.  And we wear pretty much the same benzo outfit all the time:  pajamas or sweats, leggings and flannel, depending on gender or if you really care at
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Knackered at the Dentist with Benzos

Knackered at the Dentist with Benzos    Hey there, Knackered here.  In the beginning was the fear. And the fear led to anxiety and it was not good.  I’ve generally worried about most everything for my entire lifetime.  And, of course, it’s what got me started on the benzos in the first place.  Things were bad to begin with and then they sent me to school.  It was within walking distance or running distance depending on who was chasing me.  The boxer dog on the corner was the worst.  I was f
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Everyday life while tapering

Horse Power in the Hood with Benzos

Horse Power in the Hood with Benzos    Hey there, Knackered here.  My phone app tells me that our stint of sunny days is coming to an end, soon to be replaced by the Ides of March.  With limited time I decided to make the plunge:  I was leaving the house on foot.  Don’t get scared now, I didn’t plan to talk to strangers or do any jogging.   No, the real reason I’m on the move is not to hear the warbling of songbirds or the sweet breezes through the cherry blossoms, although there’s that too
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[kn...] in Everyday life while tapering

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Everyday life while tapering

Knackered in the Sky with Benzos

Knackered in the Sky with Benzos        Hey there, Knackered here.  Having recently explored the perils and potholes of road tripping while on the withdrawal path, today we look skyward to the airlines as a source of moving ourselves around.  Just as automobile adventures require special adaptations for those of us brave enough to put ourselves out there, taking to the air is a journey in and of itself.  Going anywhere through any airport requires a massive amount of identification these da
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[kn...] in Everyday life while tapering

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Everyday life while tapering

On the Road with Benzos

Hey there, knackered here.  If you live in the Northern Hemisphere, you probably haven’t felt the earth tilting toward the sun, but there are signs of spring in the air.  If you don’t believe me you can look out the window or check the calendar.  Fair skies always leave me with a desire to go somewhere, or at least it has in the past; i.e. the quintessential road trip. Which brings to mind loading our VW bus with the family and camping gear and hoping that the engine doesn’t blow up, again, some
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[kn...] in Everyday life while tapering

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