~~The Bedridden Club~~

[[Ro...]]

Hi again Marie,  I was just posting my reply to you and Ladyden and saw there had been another post while I was slowly writing.  I had to send it anyway or I would have lost where I put it. Memory = sieve.

 

Sorry you are getting hit today. Its rotten when the waves hit. You're just right to hold. I did a 10 week hold at 1mg and 3 other holds along the way. I have plenty of regrets about the fast part of my taper. The only regrets about the holds is that I didn’t do them longer and more of them as I let things free fall to bad crashes.

 

Its late here so I am going to get a bit of rest now. Have a relaxing evening and hopefully you feel better tomorrow.

 

Roxy

 

[[ho...]]

Hi again Marie,  I was just posting my reply to you and Ladyden and saw there had been another post while I was slowly writing.  I had to send it anyway or I would have lost where I put it. Memory = sieve.

 

Sorry you are getting hit today. Its rotten when the waves hit. You're just right to hold. I did a 10 week hold at 1mg and 3 other holds along the way. I have plenty of regrets about the fast part of my taper. The only regrets about the holds is that I didn’t do them longer and more of them as I let things free fall to bad crashes.

 

Its late here so I am going to get a bit of rest now. Have a relaxing evening and hopefully you feel better tomorrow.

 

Roxy

 

 

Roxy - No worries.... I enjoyed your post.

 

Congratulations  :clap: :yippee:   You are benzo free!!!  I am so happy for you. 

 

It is so good you were able to get out of LA before the storm....OMG....that was so horrible.  I had a similar experience in Jamaica.  We barely got out...literally the last flight out, and it almost didn’t leave.  The next day our resort was flattened, literally wiped out by the hurricane.  Some of our ‘friends’ that didn’t get out, had to shelter at the Red Cross for over two weeks before they could finally leave the Island.  The day before we left, we were being served in the restaurant by our regular server (man) and they had these big beautiful white plantation shutters, no glass windows, and it was just pouring....we knew the storm was approaching (we were already scheduled to fly out the next day) and I said to the waiter....are you worried about the hurricane approaching?  He said, No mam....we have had many......I always wondered if he thought about our conversation.

 

I’m going to try and make a fried egg.....sleep well

 

Marie

[[La...]]

Hey Roxy and Marie  My new grand daughter was born yesterday April 5th healthy, strong, all fingers & toes, 6 lbs 7 oz, silky dark hair and cute pouty lips.  ohhh yeah and a nice set of lungs to cry really loud! She's supposed to go home today and I'm planning on going to go see her to hold her in my arms. This will be my first time out of my neighborhood in a year or more. Thanks for the congratulations. So sweet of you both.

I've read your posts... Roxy is in the UK and Marie on the west coast in USA. I'm also in the USA originally from Louisiana ( the other LA lol) but 4 years ago moved to SC. As far as what team to cheer for ummm I'm partial to my New Orleans Saints team. Lol

Don't worry, you'll get to where I'm at now. It takes some time. I'm still bedridden for half a day. But yes I am proof that even the worst case can and will heal. I had those doubting thoughts on my worst days but I took out my mental bat and beat them away. I advise you both to do the same. Have you read the benzo lies thread? It's so powerful. I've been sitting up watching movies with my family. I was feeling a bit rough for a few hours yesterday so I distracted by looking through old family pictures. It worked! I ended up laughing at funny moments and crying over missing passed on loved ones. The fun part was looking at who looks like who. Very strange that as my kids grew they look like me for a few years then switch to looking like their dad during teen years.

Wow you both talking about DP/DR. That can be very frustrating when at its worse. Makes you question everything and feels like an alien. My heart goes out to you. I got through that by meditation while rubbing my skin in slow small circles on my arms or face. Maybe it can help y'all. Just make slow circles using two fingers and follow the circle with your eyes closed. This simple thing got me through MANY of my waves.  I hope this symptom passes for you soon.

I'm so glad you both are having better days. Thinking of you both. Hugs

 

Oh congratulations!! A baby girl....oh how special  :smitten......I’m so happy you are going to go get to hold her!

 

SC is beautiful and I love LA.  I am lucky, I have been all over the USA. 

 

I love the meditation advice.  I have always been a self soother....I sucked my thumb until I was 10 ( no braces and perfect teeth ...go figure) and I have always rubbed my leg’s when needing comfort....so I will try the face/meditation too.  Anything that will help 

 

Ok..off to check the game boards  :laugh:

 

Marie

 

I’m on the couch right now....I did get out today but boy did the vibrating start and my motivation is so low.  I am going to hold for a month again. I don’t think I stabilized enough after my crash and burn.  Then I will try again.

Wow! I sucked my thumb until I was about 12. Also it never ruined my teeth. Perfectly straight no braces. We were lucky!!!!!!

Vibrations are not fun. I have them too. They were more intense after jump but now I get them during waves only and the intensity of them is very mild. Hang in there. It will improve. I'm glad to hear you'll try the face meditation. Please let me know how it works for you. It's pretty warm here today. Beautiful sunshine. Forecast of rain on Friday. I'm going for a walk in a little while. Get some sunlight while I can. I've heard some say they became sensitive to the sun for a short while. Has any of you had this happen?

Big hugs!!!! Hope you're having a good day.

[[La...]]

Hi guys, great to hear from you both again 

 

BIG CONGRATULATIONS! to Ladyden, on the birth of your granddaughter. How amazing that you are going to leave your neighbourhood for the first time in a year and at the end of it you get a hold a new baby and let her grip your little finger (I love it when they do that)! A double celebration. I was sorry to hear that you are bedridden for half the day but you are making up for it in the other half. Your progress is definitely an inspiration for me as I always have the niggling doubts of whether things get better when you’ve had it just so rough.

 

South Carolina 😊 That brings back memories of a road trip years ago from NYC down the Eastern seaboard. Savannah was one of the stops on that trip. Lovely place. My memory is still patchy but I’m sure it will come back. The stop before that was Roanoak in Virginia I think. I do enjoy holidaying in the US. A revisit is definitely on the list for when I am healed.

 

I’m going to pinch the New Orleans Saints Team of you! Sport is no fun unless there is a team that you support. Also, I had a blast in New Orleans. Absolutely loved it. I was there just a few days before Katrina and saw (and drove) in mad scary rain so made my way home and was gutted to the core watching the footage unfold of that what happened to that lovely place and the friendly people. I hope it is back to where it was at.

 

Marie, LOL about me thinking there were snakes everywhere. … in the house ‘no thanks’ LOL!! I imagined there were loads with your son getting bitten but it was a rare event. Its cool that he was a local celebrity on the news with his story. Well, cool with hindsight. I bet he has impressed all his mates with that one. Obviously very scary at the time but what a claim to fame for life. I haven’t made it to California yet but its on my list for when I’m well again and I will be sure to go looking for king snakes in the hills!

 

God! you and your family caught the dreaded plague. Its great that you all recovered fully from it. That would freak me out, especially now. I am in the ‘at risk’ category for a rare genetic immunity deficiency so am terrified of it. Even if I could go out I have developed agoraphobia in lockdown but I think a lot of that is down to withdrawal. Its good that you have the antibodies now though😊

 

Ladyden, I haven’t read the benzo lies thread. I would be very interested to read that. Where can I find it? I have seen references to the benzo lies and mentally try to swat the thoughts away. Its like playing Whac a mole. Do you guys have game in the US? We have it here at the seaside here.

 

I will give the meditation finger circles a go. I’ve never really done it but noticed some guided meditations on the Calm app. I listen to some of the music on there and bedtime stories at night to help with getting to sleep.

 

The DR is certainly making me question everything. I’m like the bloody narrator in my own life and my mind keeps forcing me to do these life reviews and assess. Constant running inner dialogue and microanalysis of thoughts. Ugh! Exhausting! I think the family album would be a trigger for me right now but I can see it as being quite a cathartic experience when the time is right despite the sadness for the people gone as you say. When I eventually do that I will concentrate on who looks like who too!

 

Have a lovely evening. Oh, and LadyDen, enjoy every bit of that first visit to your granddaughter. Every single second. You earned it.

 

Roxy 

Thx so much Roxy! Yes I'm going to really enjoy holding her on this Friday. They're being discharged later today. I also love babies holding my fingers. It's so sweet. This visit to go see her is a milestone and will be easy to remember my car ride.

I've traveled a lot before I got sick. Now that I'm on the east coast, when I'm healed I'd love to take a road trip down the east coast. I definitely want to visit Virginia and New York. I've already been to Maryland and Washington DC. I rode a subway for the first time. It was awesome!!! I saw it on tv many times but to ride on one is cool. The graffiti and murals along the way are beautiful works of art. I've also been to Savannah, Charleston, Charlotte and Raleigh. I had a blast! I loved the cobblestone streets, horse drawn carriages and old houses. You would love LA....except for the traffic. It's wise that if you want to get somewhere by 11 you better leave at 9. Even more earlier depending on how far the drive is. The traffic in Atlanta, Ga is pretty bad too.

Yes I agree you better wait on the photo albums. They're very stimulating. But I was healed enough so I did well. Are you or Marie able to watch movies? I do pretty well except the ones that have flashing ( explosions, strobe lights, disco lights on club scenes) and I don't do too well with prolonged loud booms ( lots of gun shots exchanges, fireworks, bass in the background). This is better than a couple of months ago but I'm still not there yet. But it's been nice sitting up watching movies again. I've seen some really good non-stimulating ones on YouTube as well. Yes we have the whack a mole game at the arcades here.

The thread is called benzo lies busted and lies benzos tell.

Yes Hurricane Katrina was life shatteringly devastating! They're still cleaning up from that storm! And people forget we were hit with Rita also. Whatever Katrina didn't damage too much, Rita came right behind and picked up where Katrina left off. I was located north of New Orleans. Rita got us good! Very very very sad times.

Hope you're feeling better and having a good day. Big hugs.

[[ho...]]

Hey Roxy and Marie  My new grand daughter was born yesterday April 5th healthy, strong, all fingers & toes, 6 lbs 7 oz, silky dark hair and cute pouty lips.  ohhh yeah and a nice set of lungs to cry really loud! She's supposed to go home today and I'm planning on going to go see her to hold her in my arms. This will be my first time out of my neighborhood in a year or more. Thanks for the congratulations. So sweet of you both.

I've read your posts... Roxy is in the UK and Marie on the west coast in USA. I'm also in the USA originally from Louisiana ( the other LA lol) but 4 years ago moved to SC. As far as what team to cheer for ummm I'm partial to my New Orleans Saints team. Lol

Don't worry, you'll get to where I'm at now. It takes some time. I'm still bedridden for half a day. But yes I am proof that even the worst case can and will heal. I had those doubting thoughts on my worst days but I took out my mental bat and beat them away. I advise you both to do the same. Have you read the benzo lies thread? It's so powerful. I've been sitting up watching movies with my family. I was feeling a bit rough for a few hours yesterday so I distracted by looking through old family pictures. It worked! I ended up laughing at funny moments and crying over missing passed on loved ones. The fun part was looking at who looks like who. Very strange that as my kids grew they look like me for a few years then switch to looking like their dad during teen years.

Wow you both talking about DP/DR. That can be very frustrating when at its worse. Makes you question everything and feels like an alien. My heart goes out to you. I got through that by meditation while rubbing my skin in slow small circles on my arms or face. Maybe it can help y'all. Just make slow circles using two fingers and follow the circle with your eyes closed. This simple thing got me through MANY of my waves.  I hope this symptom passes for you soon.

I'm so glad you both are having better days. Thinking of you both. Hugs

 

Oh congratulations!! A baby girl....oh how special  :smitten......I’m so happy you are going to go get to hold her!

 

SC is beautiful and I love LA.  I am lucky, I have been all over the USA. 

 

I love the meditation advice.  I have always been a self soother....I sucked my thumb until I was 10 ( no braces and perfect teeth ...go figure) and I have always rubbed my leg’s when needing comfort....so I will try the face/meditation too.  Anything that will help 

 

Ok..off to check the game boards  :laugh:

 

Marie

 

I’m on the couch right now....I did get out today but boy did the vibrating start and my motivation is so low.  I am going to hold for a month again. I don’t think I stabilized enough after my crash and burn.  Then I will try again.

Wow! I sucked my thumb until I was about 12. Also it never ruined my teeth. Perfectly straight no braces. We were lucky!!!!!!

Vibrations are not fun. I have them too. They were more intense after jump but now I get them during waves only and the intensity of them is very mild. Hang in there. It will improve. I'm glad to hear you'll try the face meditation. Please let me know how it works for you. It's pretty warm here today. Beautiful sunshine. Forecast of rain on Friday. I'm going for a walk in a little while. Get some sunlight while I can. I've heard some say they became sensitive to the sun for a short while. Has any of you had this happen?

Big hugs!!!! Hope you're having a good day.

 

Ha ha...a fellow thumb sucker...I most likely would have sucked mine forever if my mother didn’t cut my blanket into quarter’s and then they disappeared ??  It wasn’t the same without my blanket, so I quit!  .....She of coarse never admitted to this theft.   

 

I am going to try the face massage meditation tonight before I go to sleep....I will let you know.  I fell asleep watching TV last night.  I am rewatching “LOST” on HULU.  So yes, I watch TV, Movies....so far, nothing really bothers me too much.  I have a new book I am about to read as soon as I am done with LOST.  “ Ken Follett, The Evening and The Morning, The Prequel to ‘ The Pillars Of The Earth’”.  The Pillars Of The Earth and the series was among my favorites, and I hadn’t realized he had wrote the Prequel.  So I am so excited.  I love to read, but once I pick up a book, it’s hard for me to put it down 

 

I lived in NY ( well Yonkers) when I was 15 for a year, and we use to take the subway often....it’s an experience.  I have been back a couple of times as an adult.  I was back after the Twin Tower’s and that was very hard.  :'(  Much like the devastation from both Katrina and Rita....it’s just never the same.

 

I go out in the sun...it’s sunny here and I spent a good 30 min outside, so far I don’t appear to be “sun sensitive”....I am fair, and will burn easy, so I have to go out early. I don’t want to use sunscreen because I am trying to get Vitamin D.  I did notice when I had bad bad SX, I had burning pain on my face and itching, and that has thankfully gone away.....I wonder if it will return again?

 

Roxy- That darn DR.....it is taking a little foothold in me again....very small footprint but i see it...ugh.  I am with you...I don’t think I can do the family albums right now...I would feel guilty about the albums I am not creating right now.  I haven’t taken one game picture at my son’s games. Well at least he isn’t in uniform and not playing, so that helps.  Looks like my oldest is going to be getting married this fall.....I will have to plan a hold about a month to 6 weeks before, so that I can at least be somewhat normal for that.  Take some pictures and create some lasting memories.....

 

I hope you two are having a good day/eve......I am to some degree...half up and half down .....LOL

 

Marie

[[La...]]

Congrats to your son on the upcoming wedding. May he and his wife have a healthy happy long lasting marriage filled with joy and companionship.....and babies if they want them. I'm doing ok today. Couldn't see the new baby today because they forgot she had a newborn appointment. So I'm going Sunday. I'm feeling increased boaty today so it was best to wait.

Yes I agree that when you know you have an upcoming event to prepare as much as you can so you can enjoy it. I'm not doing much today just resting up for Sunday. I will probably do some artwork later and sit up to watch tv. I'm now trying to sit up everyday for atleast an hour or 2. The duration of 1 movie. But afterwards I'm back in bed the rest of the day. But it's worth it! 

I hope y'all are doing well and distracting with fun things. Love & hugs.

[[ki...]]

Benzo lies that have been busted thread:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=87594.470

 

:smitten:

[[ho...]]

Congrats to your son on the upcoming wedding. May he and his wife have a healthy happy long lasting marriage filled with joy and companionship.....and babies if they want them. I'm doing ok today. Couldn't see the new baby today because they forgot she had a newborn appointment. So I'm going Sunday. I'm feeling increased boaty today so it was best to wait.

Yes I agree that when you know you have an upcoming event to prepare as much as you can so you can enjoy it. I'm not doing much today just resting up for Sunday. I will probably do some artwork later and sit up to watch tv. I'm now trying to sit up everyday for atleast an hour or 2. The duration of 1 movie. But afterwards I'm back in bed the rest of the day. But it's worth it! 

I hope y'all are doing well and distracting with fun things. Love & hugs.

 

Thank you.....I am gaining another daughter.  I only had one girl ( think goodness...lol.  My boys were easier ..lol) and I just lover her to the moon and back.  His future wife seems to be a perfect fit for him, so I too am hoping for a long and happy life for them and she/ they want 4 kids...lol.  We will see.  Twins run STRONG in her family....wouldn’t that be fun.  But they plan on waiting a couple of years and I strongly am encouraging that...even maybe 3 or 4 years.  Lol.

 

It sounds like the timing worked out on your granddaughter. So hopefully tomorrow will be a wonderful day for you.  I will say a Prayer for you.  You must be very excited.

 

Today was a good day and sunny.....the last few hours I have been resting on the couch and will now watch some TV.  I hope you maybe got to spend a little more up time!!  Maybe that can increase soon for you 

 

Happy weekend

 

Marie

[[ho...]]

Benzo lies that have been busted thread:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=87594.470

 

:smitten:

 

Such a great post  :smitten:

 

Marie

[[Ro...]]

Hi Marie,

 

CONGRATULATIONS! WOW! An upcoming wedding to look forward to and the bride is a perfect match and someone you love to bits. Very exciting. I love weddings. What a lovely occasion to look forward to. You will have a lovely album to enjoy after that. Are they close by so you can see your future twin grandchildren. I love twins. Double cuteness.

 

You had a much tighter hurricane scrape than me getting out of Jamaica on the last flight. That would be a lot scarier with being on a small island so no other way off. I bet there was a collective sigh of relief when that flight landed. I’d love to go to Jamaica one day.

 

Its really good that you are watching movies and reading. I really enjoyed LOST but I don’t think I could handle the drama right now or the lights and noise.  I am watching The Crown in very small bits right now (I prefer to binge on boxsets usually) with the volume down low. My hearing is crazy. I had a phone call with my doctor without lifting my phone to my ear not long ago so I assumed it was on loudspeaker… until I realised I wasn’t….  Its like having a weird hearing superpower. Lol (hmm – must think how I could put this to use before I lose this newish found power)

 

I took my first subway in New York too. I’ve been there quite a bit over the years. I love the shopping and eating out. Everything is just so accessible. I don’t think I would ever cook if I lived there. …. Can’t do summers there though – too hot but the rest of the year is fine. The Twin Towers was so hard even for people like me from abroad. It must have really hit hard for you going back to the City you lived in to see what had gone on. I remember watching the horror unfold with a lovely colleague whose brother was working there that day. He was ok but so many weren’t. Just heart breaking. 

 

I’ve been under water for a few days again with the symptoms but have surfaced for the evening and am back on the couch. Thank you for the congrats. You will be benzo free too. Although it seems like it takes forever sometimes, the end of the taper sort of creeps up on you. I was a bit anxious about the ‘jump’ and had a false start as I feared the biggest wave yet but it didn’t happen like that. Its just ongoing waves and windows. The drilling chemical insomnia has actually broken for now which is a HUGE relief. I had no real insomnia windows in months until now. I am so tired underneath.

 

Brilliant that you are having a good day.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend. 

 

Roxy

 

p.s I did a bit of thumb sucking too for a couple of years but then a new habit caught my eye – the nail biting. I had to use that stuff that tastes vile from the chemist as nail polish to stop me doing it as I bit my fingers too. It stung a lot and was bitter. Haven’t bitten them since though.

 

 

[[Ro...]]

Hi LadyDen

 

So, tomorrow is the big day. Meeting a whole new little person. Yay!  ;D Very exciting. It is probably better being on a Sunday as it’s a more relaxing day, less traffic etc.

 

I feared that New Orleans would be going through it still. Absolutely heart breaking.  When Rita was forecast I remember thinking please land anywhere but there. I hope that things keep getting better. I am definitely going back there.

 

I love reading about your beautiful walks in the sunshine and dreaming…. It is bloody freezing here and my heating is on the blink. I just imagine the sunny bright cheer. Lovely. I haven’t been out yet in the sun to test my skin and there is none here at the minute anyway.  When I do make it out I am not expecting much difference. At all times when I am in the sun I have to wear kiddies factor 50 sunblock. Sticky ugly mess that gets all over your clothes and in your eyes. Ugh! Nothing to do with w/ds and everything to do with my Irish freckled pale skin which turns lobster and blisters in minutes – the “Irish suntan” lol. 

 

I am really looking forward to another road trip when I am healed too. The US is the best place for a road trip. You and Marie are very lucky to have seen so much of your vast amazing country already and you are already in place for an Eastern seaboard trip. I look at the road trip planners for the US and my biggest problem is that there are so many I want to do so choosing is hard.

I’d only seen the subway on TVs/movies before I had my first ride in New York. I felt like I was on a movie set – Lol. The London underground has a very different feel to it. London traffic is pretty similar to New York traffic so I am pretty used to the stop and start traffic. More horn blowing in New York though– you guys say ‘honking.’ Boy do you guys know how to honk. All the honking took a bit of getting used to. Traffic jams accompanied by constant high pitched noise – ouch!  :laugh:

 

I’m not able to follow movies again yet. My concentration keeps dropping out like a weird computer outage. I watch some crappy ‘soaps’ that are more of a habit than anything and it doesn’t matter if you miss bits. They are just something you watch as your mum watched them when you were a kid so they feel familiar. One of them, Coronation Street is only 20 minutes divided in two 10 minute segments a few times a week and I lose the plot of that, not that there is much loss in that. Lol. It has cobbled streets though so you would like them. I love the cobbles too and I love old stone walls. I am slowly getting into The Crown at the moment but in small bits. I knew it would be safe from all the modern lights and noise. I’m not reading anything at the minute. It takes me an age to read on here and I used to be a speed reader.

 

Thanks for the advice on the Benzo Lies. Kitsune kindly left the link and I really enjoyed – and needed – River Wolfs post.

 

I hope you are enjoying your weekend so far. Are you working on a painting now? Whatever you are doing I hope it is relaxing for you in advance of your big day.

 

Healing vibes and big hugs. Roxy

 

 

 

[[Ro...]]

Hi Kitsune,

 

Thank you so much for getting that link to me. I have read River’s post. Just brilliant. I am going to reread it and the rest of the thread soon. I needed that. 

 

I see from your taper that you are in the final furlongs. Not long now.  I went right down to 0.1 before 'jumping.' It was just like another cut and not the worst one either. In fact my drilling insomnia finally broke around the week of my 'jump' and I'm getting 10 hours sleep at a time (but during the day). This is my first insomnia window since I hit 3mg ages ago so i don't mind when the sleep comes!

 

I hope you're having a lovely weekend.

 

Roxy

[[La...]]

Benzo lies that have been busted thread:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=87594.470

 

:smitten:

Thank you Kits for this!  :smitten:

You are just a beautiful soul!

[[La...]]

Oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!! Hey ladies I thought I was in a dream yesterday!!!! I cried happy tears and still crying. Somebody pinch me...  Better yet don't wake me if I'm dreaming. Let me tell you about it!

Sunday was the best day to go see the baby. I was feeling my best so it was perfect to take my first ride in over a year!!!!! I did well with the 12-15 minute car ride. When I got inside their house and saw my new grand daughter wrapped in a pink swaddling blanket sleeping with her tiny hands under her face the little boatiness from the car ride left. I picked her up and kissed her forehead. She smelled like a sweet baby rose. I thanked God over and over and over for letting me be well enough to meet her. I was able to stay sitting up in a chair holding her about 40 minutes before I handed her off to other family. I stayed a total of hour and a half. The car ride back went well also. I rested at home the remainder of the day. By bedtime I started a small wave. But I expected this because I just had that big adventure. This morning I'm very sore especially my neck but it was all worth it. If I'm feeling up to it, I'm going to see her again tomorrow. Thanks for all your love, encouragement and support! I hope you have a big milestone too!

Yes it's hard picking places to go. But I think once I'm healed well enough to be in a car for atleast an hour and a half, I'm going somewhere very close to test the waters. They have waterfalls near me that I'd love to see. I think that will be my first getaway.

I hope you both are doing well today. I love reading your posts. What did you all do on this Sunday?

[[ki...]]

Benzo lies that have been busted thread:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=87594.470

 

:smitten:

Thank you Kits for this!  :smitten:

You are just a beautiful soul!

 

❤️❤️❤️

[[ho...]]

Oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!! Hey ladies I thought I was in a dream yesterday!!!! I cried happy tears and still crying. Somebody pinch me...  Better yet don't wake me if I'm dreaming. Let me tell you about it!

Sunday was the best day to go see the baby. I was feeling my best so it was perfect to take my first ride in over a year!!!!! I did well with the 12-15 minute car ride. When I got inside their house and saw my new grand daughter wrapped in a pink swaddling blanket sleeping with her tiny hands under her face the little boatiness from the car ride left. I picked her up and kissed her forehead. She smelled like a sweet baby rose. I thanked God over and over and over for letting me be well enough to meet her. I was able to stay sitting up in a chair holding her about 40 minutes before I handed her off to other family. I stayed a total of hour and a half. The car ride back went well also. I rested at home the remainder of the day. By bedtime I started a small wave. But I expected this because I just had that big adventure. This morning I'm very sore especially my neck but it was all worth it. If I'm feeling up to it, I'm going to see her again tomorrow. Thanks for all your love, encouragement and support! I hope you have a big milestone too!

Yes it's hard picking places to go. But I think once I'm healed well enough to be in a car for atleast an hour and a half, I'm going somewhere very close to test the waters. They have waterfalls near me that I'd love to see. I think that will be my first getaway.

I hope you both are doing well today. I love reading your posts. What did you all do on this Sunday?

 

Hi -  I have been wondering how the visit went.  I am so sorry I am just now getting over here.  It’s been a busy week. 

 

Your post made me cry (happy tears)...How exciting...how sweet.....what joy :smitten:   I imagine you are just over the moon.  What a way to push on too.  A reason to push forward..... I like the idea of going to the waterfall’s. Water is so healing too, and the majesty of a waterfall in all it’s glory, has to be healing for the mind, body and soul.  You can do this!!! 

 

My son got his driver’s lic two days ago....so that is exciting.  I dropped .35 mg (so down to 9mg) two nights ago, and then I am going to hold.  I will be deciding on moving forward with the DMT, or smaller DT after I see how I do on this drop. 

 

Marie

[[ho...]]

Hi Marie,

 

CONGRATULATIONS! WOW! An upcoming wedding to look forward to and the bride is a perfect match and someone you love to bits. Very exciting. I love weddings. What a lovely occasion to look forward to. You will have a lovely album to enjoy after that. Are they close by so you can see your future twin grandchildren. I love twins. Double cuteness.

 

You had a much tighter hurricane scrape than me getting out of Jamaica on the last flight. That would be a lot scarier with being on a small island so no other way off. I bet there was a collective sigh of relief when that flight landed. I’d love to go to Jamaica one day.

 

Its really good that you are watching movies and reading. I really enjoyed LOST but I don’t think I could handle the drama right now or the lights and noise.  I am watching The Crown in very small bits right now (I prefer to binge on boxsets usually) with the volume down low. My hearing is crazy. I had a phone call with my doctor without lifting my phone to my ear not long ago so I assumed it was on loudspeaker… until I realised I wasn’t….  Its like having a weird hearing superpower. Lol (hmm – must think how I could put this to use before I lose this newish found power)

 

I took my first subway in New York too. I’ve been there quite a bit over the years. I love the shopping and eating out. Everything is just so accessible. I don’t think I would ever cook if I lived there. …. Can’t do summers there though – too hot but the rest of the year is fine. The Twin Towers was so hard even for people like me from abroad. It must have really hit hard for you going back to the City you lived in to see what had gone on. I remember watching the horror unfold with a lovely colleague whose brother was working there that day. He was ok but so many weren’t. Just heart breaking. 

 

I’ve been under water for a few days again with the symptoms but have surfaced for the evening and am back on the couch. Thank you for the congrats. You will be benzo free too. Although it seems like it takes forever sometimes, the end of the taper sort of creeps up on you. I was a bit anxious about the ‘jump’ and had a false start as I feared the biggest wave yet but it didn’t happen like that. Its just ongoing waves and windows. The drilling chemical insomnia has actually broken for now which is a HUGE relief. I had no real insomnia windows in months until now. I am so tired underneath.

 

Brilliant that you are having a good day.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend. 

 

Roxy

 

p.s I did a bit of thumb sucking too for a couple of years but then a new habit caught my eye – the nail biting. I had to use that stuff that tastes vile from the chemist as nail polish to stop me doing it as I bit my fingers too. It stung a lot and was bitter. Haven’t bitten them since though.

 

Hi -

 

Thank you....yes.  It will be small, but nice 

 

I am going to watch The Crown next.  I have heard great things about it.  I listen to the TV on low volume too. 

 

New York is just LOUD, and so are the people....LOL.  It’s just a NY thing.  My uncle is from there and we always joke about that.  I want to come to London.  My partner and I plan on visiting when he retires.  I love history...we will then go over to Ireland and then Scotland.  I too have the fair skin that likes to burn...lol.  I have a lot of clothes with built in 50 SPF and swim shirts and trunks with 50SPF too.  But I love the sun and I love to be in the water.

 

I hope you are feeling a bit better than the last time you posted.  Let us know. 

 

And I also switched from the thumb sucking to the nail biting.  When I started to get my nails done at 15 ( acrylics) that’s what stopped my nail biting habit. 

 

Check back later.....

 

Marie

[[Ma...]]

Hi Marie,

 

CONGRATULATIONS! WOW! An upcoming wedding to look forward to and the bride is a perfect match and someone you love to bits. Very exciting. I love weddings. What a lovely occasion to look forward to. You will have a lovely album to enjoy after that. Are they close by so you can see your future twin grandchildren. I love twins. Double cuteness.

 

You had a much tighter hurricane scrape than me getting out of Jamaica on the last flight. That would be a lot scarier with being on a small island so no other way off. I bet there was a collective sigh of relief when that flight landed. I’d love to go to Jamaica one day.

 

Its really good that you are watching movies and reading. I really enjoyed LOST but I don’t think I could handle the drama right now or the lights and noise.  I am watching The Crown in very small bits right now (I prefer to binge on boxsets usually) with the volume down low. My hearing is crazy. I had a phone call with my doctor without lifting my phone to my ear not long ago so I assumed it was on loudspeaker… until I realised I wasn’t….  Its like having a weird hearing superpower. Lol (hmm – must think how I could put this to use before I lose this newish found power)

 

I took my first subway in New York too. I’ve been there quite a bit over the years. I love the shopping and eating out. Everything is just so accessible. I don’t think I would ever cook if I lived there. …. Can’t do summers there though – too hot but the rest of the year is fine. The Twin Towers was so hard even for people like me from abroad. It must have really hit hard for you going back to the City you lived in to see what had gone on. I remember watching the horror unfold with a lovely colleague whose brother was working there that day. He was ok but so many weren’t. Just heart breaking. 

 

I’ve been under water for a few days again with the symptoms but have surfaced for the evening and am back on the couch. Thank you for the congrats. You will be benzo free too. Although it seems like it takes forever sometimes, the end of the taper sort of creeps up on you. I was a bit anxious about the ‘jump’ and had a false start as I feared the biggest wave yet but it didn’t happen like that. Its just ongoing waves and windows. The drilling chemical insomnia has actually broken for now which is a HUGE relief. I had no real insomnia windows in months until now. I am so tired underneath.

 

Brilliant that you are having a good day.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend. 

 

Roxy

 

p.s I did a bit of thumb sucking too for a couple of years but then a new habit caught my eye – the nail biting. I had to use that stuff that tastes vile from the chemist as nail polish to stop me doing it as I bit my fingers too. It stung a lot and was bitter. Haven’t bitten them since though.

 

Hi -

 

Thank you....yes.  It will be small, but nice 

 

I am going to watch The Crown next.  I have heard great things about it.  I listen to the TV on low volume too. 

 

New York is just LOUD, and so are the people....LOL.  It’s just a NY thing.  My uncle is from there and we always joke about that.  I want to come to London.  My partner and I plan on visiting when he retires.  I love history...we will then go over to Ireland and then Scotland.  I too have the fair skin that likes to burn...lol.  I have a lot of clothes with built in 50 SPF and swim shirts and trunks with 50SPF too.  But I love the sun and I love to be in the water.

 

I hope you are feeling a bit better than the last time you posted.  Let us know. 

 

And I also switched from the thumb sucking to the nail biting.  When I started to get my nails done at 15 ( acrylics) that’s what stopped my nail biting habit. 

 

Check back later.....

 

Marie

 

I really enjoy the Crown Marie.  I love English history  ;).  Bet you will enjoy it too 

[[Ro...]]

Ladyden, I’m absolutely delighted for you. What a beautiful uplifting post. Its just brilliant that you were feeling so good on the day and everything went to plan and that you were able to sit up and hold your granddaughter for a long time after a car journey. That was a very eventful day making lovely memories. 

 

You have done so well to only get a small wave after all of that. Have you been back to see her again yet?

 

I was underwater again last Sunday. I'm just getting a foggy window now and am thankfully back on the couch again. I hope it lasts for the weekend…

 

You are so lucky to live near waterfalls. I adore them - the sight, the sound, the spray of cooling water.  Sounds perfect for your day trip.  Do you paint landscapes?

 

I hope that the stiff neck has settled by now? I have that too. I can’t turn it properly and it burns all the time– ouch!

 

Have a lovely weekend and hopefully more time with your all brand new little person! 

 

Roxy

 

[[Ro...]]

Marie, its good news about the new driver in the family. That could come in handy 

 

The Crown is fantastic so far. I would definitely recommend it.  Its really well written and acted. I am going to try and watch some more of it this weekend.  As you enjoy history you will be spoiled for choice in London. You will love the castles in Scotland and Ireland has a bit of everything. Coastal drives along the west coast are so much fun. I like to look over the Atlantic and think about how the next landfall (apart from a few small islands) is New York! The Highlands of Scotland makes for a stunning road trip too. 

 

LOL your loud uncle from New York. Its handy that you have a relative there so you can go shopping on your visits.

 

I love being in the water too. I used to swim in the Atlantic when I was a kid as I grew up about a half hour from the coast. Its really cold though. Get a wetsuit if you go in! You won’t need much of the suntan lotion in Scotland or Ireland. It rains more than anything most of the year with some nice weeks in summer. It doesn’t get too hot. London gets too hot for me in summer now.

 

I finally caught a window. I hope it stays open for the weekend as the week has been pretty stormy seas. Hey ho! Onwards and upwards!

 

I’ve got my fingers crossed for you that you don’t feel the cut too much. I seemed to have a lag of 9-10 days before I hit the peak of the waves after cuts.

 

 

Have a lovely weekend, Roxy 

 

 

[[ho...]]

Hi Marie,

 

CONGRATULATIONS! WOW! An upcoming wedding to look forward to and the bride is a perfect match and someone you love to bits. Very exciting. I love weddings. What a lovely occasion to look forward to. You will have a lovely album to enjoy after that. Are they close by so you can see your future twin grandchildren. I love twins. Double cuteness.

 

You had a much tighter hurricane scrape than me getting out of Jamaica on the last flight. That would be a lot scarier with being on a small island so no other way off. I bet there was a collective sigh of relief when that flight landed. I’d love to go to Jamaica one day.

 

Its really good that you are watching movies and reading. I really enjoyed LOST but I don’t think I could handle the drama right now or the lights and noise.  I am watching The Crown in very small bits right now (I prefer to binge on boxsets usually) with the volume down low. My hearing is crazy. I had a phone call with my doctor without lifting my phone to my ear not long ago so I assumed it was on loudspeaker… until I realised I wasn’t….  Its like having a weird hearing superpower. Lol (hmm – must think how I could put this to use before I lose this newish found power)

 

I took my first subway in New York too. I’ve been there quite a bit over the years. I love the shopping and eating out. Everything is just so accessible. I don’t think I would ever cook if I lived there. …. Can’t do summers there though – too hot but the rest of the year is fine. The Twin Towers was so hard even for people like me from abroad. It must have really hit hard for you going back to the City you lived in to see what had gone on. I remember watching the horror unfold with a lovely colleague whose brother was working there that day. He was ok but so many weren’t. Just heart breaking. 

 

I’ve been under water for a few days again with the symptoms but have surfaced for the evening and am back on the couch. Thank you for the congrats. You will be benzo free too. Although it seems like it takes forever sometimes, the end of the taper sort of creeps up on you. I was a bit anxious about the ‘jump’ and had a false start as I feared the biggest wave yet but it didn’t happen like that. Its just ongoing waves and windows. The drilling chemical insomnia has actually broken for now which is a HUGE relief. I had no real insomnia windows in months until now. I am so tired underneath.

 

Brilliant that you are having a good day.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend. 

 

Roxy

 

p.s I did a bit of thumb sucking too for a couple of years but then a new habit caught my eye – the nail biting. I had to use that stuff that tastes vile from the chemist as nail polish to stop me doing it as I bit my fingers too. It stung a lot and was bitter. Haven’t bitten them since though.

 

Hi -

 

Thank you....yes.  It will be small, but nice 

 

I am going to watch The Crown next.  I have heard great things about it.  I listen to the TV on low volume too. 

 

New York is just LOUD, and so are the people....LOL.  It’s just a NY thing.  My uncle is from there and we always joke about that.  I want to come to London.  My partner and I plan on visiting when he retires.  I love history...we will then go over to Ireland and then Scotland.  I too have the fair skin that likes to burn...lol.  I have a lot of clothes with built in 50 SPF and swim shirts and trunks with 50SPF too.  But I love the sun and I love to be in the water.

 

I hope you are feeling a bit better than the last time you posted.  Let us know. 

 

And I also switched from the thumb sucking to the nail biting.  When I started to get my nails done at 15 ( acrylics) that’s what stopped my nail biting habit. 

 

Check back later.....

 

Marie

 

I really enjoy the Crown Marie.  I love English history  ;).  Bet you will enjoy it too 

 

Mary -  Thank you... I am sure I am going to love it.  I catch myself using English phrases all the time, from all my “reading” and watching “English History” shows...lol. 

 

How are you doing?

 

Marie

[[ho...]]

Marie, its good news about the new driver in the family. That could come in handy 

 

The Crown is fantastic so far. I would definitely recommend it.  Its really well written and acted. I am going to try and watch some more of it this weekend.  As you enjoy history you will be spoiled for choice in London. You will love the castles in Scotland and Ireland has a bit of everything. Coastal drives along the west coast are so much fun. I like to look over the Atlantic and think about how the next landfall (apart from a few small islands) is New York! The Highlands of Scotland makes for a stunning road trip too. 

 

LOL your loud uncle from New York. Its handy that you have a relative there so you can go shopping on your visits.

 

I love being in the water too. I used to swim in the Atlantic when I was a kid as I grew up about a half hour from the coast. Its really cold though. Get a wetsuit if you go in! You won’t need much of the suntan lotion in Scotland or Ireland. It rains more than anything most of the year with some nice weeks in summer. It doesn’t get too hot. London gets too hot for me in summer now.

 

I finally caught a window. I hope it stays open for the weekend as the week has been pretty stormy seas. Hey ho! Onwards and upwards!

 

I’ve got my fingers crossed for you that you don’t feel the cut too much. I seemed to have a lag of 9-10 days before I hit the peak of the waves after cuts.

 

 

Have a lovely weekend, Roxy 

 

Roxy-

 

Yes...it’s so nice he is driving now.  It saves me money on uber’s (yet my Ins. Premiums go up, so it’s about a wash..lol) and it gives him some freedom.  Plus it’s nice to have him be able to run to the store for a few items in a pinch.  He would skateboard down to the store before if I wasn’t feeling well, or my older son would come get him and they would go do the shopping. My partner would also stop and pick up stuff too, but he works so hard, I always hated asking him.  And honestly, even when I feel good, I really don’t like grocery shopping...

 

I hope you do get to watch some of The Crown this weekend.  I just finished Lost and so I will be starting The Crown! I’m excited.  I am defiantly going to do the Highlands in Scotland, that is the main reason I want to go.  I know it’s very cold and rainy most of the time.  That doesn’t bother me, but we do plan on going in the summer.  I lived on the coast of CA, the very top near the OR border, and it was very cold and rainy most of the year.  We had about 3-4 good months (especially where we lived, tucked away and by a river, so not as much coastal fog in the summer months) so I am use to the cold/wet weather.  My partner, not so much...lol. We may need to pack him electric motorcycle riding gear to keep him warm :laugh: . 

 

The Atlantic Ocean is so warm compared to the Pacific Ocean along the US borders....when I lived in NY and in FL, I loved swimming in the Atlantic because it was so warm, compared to the Pacific along most of CA.  The Pacific does warm up a bit down in Southern CA (way south) but still cold....much warmer down in Mexico, and of coarse Hawaii it’s nice and warm.  We usually use wetsuits here when we go bogie boarding most of the year.  Late summer, and if it is really really hot, we might not use them, or use a half suit.  But here in central ca ( we usually go to Santa Cruz or Capitola) the water is pretty darn cold.  Isn’t it strange how the ocean’s can be cold and warm in different places; this has always fascinated me.  I hope you too can get back to swimming....I so look forward to being back out on my boogie board.

 

My uncle actually lives here with my aunt now.....but my cousins still live there, so we do have a place to stay if we want to visit.  We have talked about a family trip back East...we will see.  They are coming out here next month. 

 

I am so glad you got a window....Praying that it stays wide open!!  Sending positive vibes and energy too. 

 

You know, I too had a stiff neck this past week...how strange.  I got the biggest knot.  It started last Saturday morning, and I could hardly turn my neck.  My son worked on it two different times.  This last time, I think he really got to the root of the knot because today for the first time in almost a week, I am now able to move better.  I hope our necks all get better 

 

I usually feel my cuts at about the 36 hour mark and on, by about 7-10 out, I “usually” am getting better, but there have been times in my previous cuts, that didn’t happen.  I have no idea why, I just know because I kept track.....But I definitely feel the cuts quickly.  I am already feeling it, it’s not too bad, but it was just a little over 3%...I’ll know more in a few days.  One time a made a cut ( a 1 mg cut) and I felt it with in like 14 hours, and it hit me like a brick!  I cut a couple days early because I was feeling pretty good, but then when it hit so hard, I went ahead and took the 1mg (since it had only been 14 hours since my cut) and with in an hour, I felt better.  I then waited a few days and stabilized (well as stable at that time, as I thought stable was) and then I cut.  It wasn’t as bad when I did cut a few days later. 

 

Okay...enough rambling...lol

 

I hope you're having a good day and this will be a great weekend!

 

Marie

 

 

[[La...]]

Oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!! Hey ladies I thought I was in a dream yesterday!!!! I cried happy tears and still crying. Somebody pinch me...  Better yet don't wake me if I'm dreaming. Let me tell you about it!

Sunday was the best day to go see the baby. I was feeling my best so it was perfect to take my first ride in over a year!!!!! I did well with the 12-15 minute car ride. When I got inside their house and saw my new grand daughter wrapped in a pink swaddling blanket sleeping with her tiny hands under her face the little boatiness from the car ride left. I picked her up and kissed her forehead. She smelled like a sweet baby rose. I thanked God over and over and over for letting me be well enough to meet her. I was able to stay sitting up in a chair holding her about 40 minutes before I handed her off to other family. I stayed a total of hour and a half. The car ride back went well also. I rested at home the remainder of the day. By bedtime I started a small wave. But I expected this because I just had that big adventure. This morning I'm very sore especially my neck but it was all worth it. If I'm feeling up to it, I'm going to see her again tomorrow. Thanks for all your love, encouragement and support! I hope you have a big milestone too!

Yes it's hard picking places to go. But I think once I'm healed well enough to be in a car for atleast an hour and a half, I'm going somewhere very close to test the waters. They have waterfalls near me that I'd love to see. I think that will be my first getaway.

I hope you both are doing well today. I love reading your posts. What did you all do on this Sunday?

 

Hi -  I have been wondering how the visit went.  I am so sorry I am just now getting over here.  It’s been a busy week. 

 

Your post made me cry (happy tears)...How exciting...how sweet.....what joy :smitten:   I imagine you are just over the moon.  What a way to push on too.  A reason to push forward..... I like the idea of going to the waterfall’s. Water is so healing too, and the majesty of a waterfall in all it’s glory, has to be healing for the mind, body and soul.  You can do this!!! 

 

My son got his driver’s lic two days ago....so that is exciting.  I dropped .35 mg (so down to 9mg) two nights ago, and then I am going to hold.  I will be deciding on moving forward with the DMT, or smaller DT after I see how I do on this drop. 

 

Marie

Congrats on your son becoming a licensed driver. Ok people on the highway you better look out!  congrats on your drop. I know you'll do fine. You're wise to hold that dose for a bit. Slow and steady wins the race, Marie. Avoid the temptation of speeding up especially at the end. I'm sure you'll make the best choice for yourself with DMT or DT. I can't wait to see what you decide. Just know I'm here for you. You got this!  Hugs and love

[[La...]]

Hi Marie,

 

CONGRATULATIONS! WOW! An upcoming wedding to look forward to and the bride is a perfect match and someone you love to bits. Very exciting. I love weddings. What a lovely occasion to look forward to. You will have a lovely album to enjoy after that. Are they close by so you can see your future twin grandchildren. I love twins. Double cuteness.

 

You had a much tighter hurricane scrape than me getting out of Jamaica on the last flight. That would be a lot scarier with being on a small island so no other way off. I bet there was a collective sigh of relief when that flight landed. I’d love to go to Jamaica one day.

 

Its really good that you are watching movies and reading. I really enjoyed LOST but I don’t think I could handle the drama right now or the lights and noise.  I am watching The Crown in very small bits right now (I prefer to binge on boxsets usually) with the volume down low. My hearing is crazy. I had a phone call with my doctor without lifting my phone to my ear not long ago so I assumed it was on loudspeaker… until I realised I wasn’t….  Its like having a weird hearing superpower. Lol (hmm – must think how I could put this to use before I lose this newish found power)

 

I took my first subway in New York too. I’ve been there quite a bit over the years. I love the shopping and eating out. Everything is just so accessible. I don’t think I would ever cook if I lived there. …. Can’t do summers there though – too hot but the rest of the year is fine. The Twin Towers was so hard even for people like me from abroad. It must have really hit hard for you going back to the City you lived in to see what had gone on. I remember watching the horror unfold with a lovely colleague whose brother was working there that day. He was ok but so many weren’t. Just heart breaking. 

 

I’ve been under water for a few days again with the symptoms but have surfaced for the evening and am back on the couch. Thank you for the congrats. You will be benzo free too. Although it seems like it takes forever sometimes, the end of the taper sort of creeps up on you. I was a bit anxious about the ‘jump’ and had a false start as I feared the biggest wave yet but it didn’t happen like that. Its just ongoing waves and windows. The drilling chemical insomnia has actually broken for now which is a HUGE relief. I had no real insomnia windows in months until now. I am so tired underneath.

 

Brilliant that you are having a good day.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend. 

 

Roxy

 

p.s I did a bit of thumb sucking too for a couple of years but then a new habit caught my eye – the nail biting. I had to use that stuff that tastes vile from the chemist as nail polish to stop me doing it as I bit my fingers too. It stung a lot and was bitter. Haven’t bitten them since though.

 

Hi -

 

Thank you....yes.  It will be small, but nice 

 

I am going to watch The Crown next.  I have heard great things about it.  I listen to the TV on low volume too. 

 

New York is just LOUD, and so are the people....LOL.  It’s just a NY thing.  My uncle is from there and we always joke about that.  I want to come to London.  My partner and I plan on visiting when he retires.  I love history...we will then go over to Ireland and then Scotland.  I too have the fair skin that likes to burn...lol.  I have a lot of clothes with built in 50 SPF and swim shirts and trunks with 50SPF too.  But I love the sun and I love to be in the water.

 

I hope you are feeling a bit better than the last time you posted.  Let us know. 

 

And I also switched from the thumb sucking to the nail biting.  When I started to get my nails done at 15 ( acrylics) that’s what stopped my nail biting habit. 

 

Check back later.....

 

Marie

 

I really enjoy the Crown Marie.  I love English history  ;).  Bet you will enjoy it too 

Mary I love English tv too! I watched a series called " call the midwife". Wow it was great and not too stimulating. Have you seen it?

[[La...]]

Ladyden, I’m absolutely delighted for you. What a beautiful uplifting post. Its just brilliant that you were feeling so good on the day and everything went to plan and that you were able to sit up and hold your granddaughter for a long time after a car journey. That was a very eventful day making lovely memories. 

 

You have done so well to only get a small wave after all of that. Have you been back to see her again yet?

 

I was underwater again last Sunday. I'm just getting a foggy window now and am thankfully back on the couch again. I hope it lasts for the weekend…

 

You are so lucky to live near waterfalls. I adore them - the sight, the sound, the spray of cooling water.  Sounds perfect for your day trip.  Do you paint landscapes?

 

I hope that the stiff neck has settled by now? I have that too. I can’t turn it properly and it burns all the time– ouch!

 

Have a lovely weekend and hopefully more time with your all brand new little person! 

 

Roxy

I'm planning on seeing her again tomorrow (Sunday). Yes I was over the moon happy! Since then I've had waves so I've been doing some self care. Today I'm in a medium wave with bad headache for the second day.

I'm glad you're at least on the couch again. Hang in there. Soon you'll be able to always be on the couch. Then always be able to go for walks. Then many things. We know by now this is a back and forth ping pong journey. It sucks but we ROCK! 

Yes I paint landscapes. Many ask me why I don't sell my work. But I prefer to give as gifts. To me art is too precious to put a price on.

Enjoy your day tomorrow. Love and hugs. I'm here for you.