How many people HAVE to work while tapering

[[Di...]]

DP,

 

I haven't had a chance to congratulate you! You've made it!

 

I'm sure you have already covered this, but are you getting enough exercise? My sleep quality is definitely most closely tied with the amount of exercise I get that day.

 

Best,

 

Workin

 

Thanks Workin.

 

I wish there was a correlation between sleep and exercise for me, because it would be a lot easier to sort it out. I must admit I don’t exercise as much as I used to when I was younger, but I still try to walk for 30 minutes 4-5 times a week. It doesn’t seem to affect how well I sleep, or don’t sleep, though.

 

I slept better last night, but I did take 25mg of doxy before bed because I wanted to make sure I slept okay because I have to work today. I probably should have gone to bed earlier though because I was really sleepy at about 8pm, but the final ep of Masterchef was on last night and I had to see who won. So I think I missed that “window of opportunity” to fall asleep on my own. On the upside, at least the 25mg worked. The previous nights twice that amount had very little effect at all. So hopefully things are improving. 

 

[Guest [in...]]

Wait...final episode of Masterchef! I watch that. No final here! Did I miss!? Don't tell me who won!

[Guest [in...]]

All must b busier than me today! Well, I loathe to admit this, but u r my confidants. I've just found a dried pile of cat vomit under my bed...from the looks of it, been there awhile. Have I let my housekeeping slide? Yep, u betcha...I've since wandered round the house looking in corners & nooks. Cobwebs & dust. I'm realizing I'm getting the basics done but nothing more. I vow to come back swingin tomorrow! I've got to clean my house! I'm sure U'd love a detailed acct of the cat puke clean up, but I will spare u, my friends! 

 

Two things. Iggie...first, 4 o'clock is always my bewitching hour..like clockwork, no need to look at the clock. Always...second. You don't want to see my house, I'm not looking up or down right now, if it's not right in my line of vision it doesn't count the house will be wait! 

 

But Saga how on Earth could a civilized person miss a pile of cat puke!? 

[[or...]]

Oh yeah, missing cat puke? Easy! Don't feel bad ingrid. I haven't vacuumed under my bed or even LOOKED under it since, I blush to admit, I don't know. My benzo taper makes me completely uninterested in what's going on in that location. There might be mountains of cp under there. But Kiki (my bedroom cat) is maybe a little too portly to squeeze herself under the bed. So I might be safe. Just dust bunnies.

 

TG my partner takes care of the vacuuming in the rest of the house (may a thousand blessings rain down) or we would be knee deep in the aforementioned cp. Becuzz with 3 other cats, and the occasional digestive disturbance, yeah, the deposits appear.

 

So . . . it's a better day today. Good, as I had to go meet a client and then go to a doc's app't -- the doc (not my PCP boo hiss to him) who saw me in the ER when I was dragged in screeching in pain in March. Ah, he remembers me well. He was nice enough to sign my medical MJ application. He wants to see me every 3 months. I think that's fair.

 

Most of the crappiest crap that I experienced over the weekend is gone -- I guess I'm back to 80/20. Some cog fog, some yuck, nothing too bad. I have a brand new fundraising project to work on and I need to NOT FEEL SICK for a few days to get it underway. Hear that, benzos?

 

Hope everyone else is doing well. Hmm . . . I should have read back in the thread. I just got mesmerized by the cat puke.

 

DP glad you slept! I find that abut doxy, also. There's definitely a window of opportunity. Keep vaping!

 

Okatz

 

 

[[dr...]]

Hi all....

 

I am at three months off and just wanted to take a few days away from the boards.  I think I have been healing, but I only see it when I look back a few weeks.  I want to try and focus on my life without being reminded of benzos every few hours.  Except for that 12 hour spike I had on Thursday my symptoms seem pretty consistant and constant. It was terrible while I was hit but it only lasted a short while.  This must mean healing is taking place. While this is far from ideal on how i feel, I can do this and will mark my time.  it seems crazy that I jumped three months ago!  I remember looking at others ahead of me and now I am one.  I find my bit of coffee and forcing myself to jog even when I feel bad is starting to pay dividends.  my legs have been the least sore since my taper started and that is with all the jogging.  I am seeing some positives and am trying not to let the negatives drag me down.  I am rambling a bit as I am just finishing the work day.     

 

My symptoms-daily morning blahs and cog fog most of the day

                    -occasional cycling of cement head and pressure

                      -bouts of heightened anxiety

                      -poor sleep

                      -loose bowels for over a month

                      -periods of DP

                      -sweating

                      -very minor tinnitus or hissing

                      -tiredness

Things that have not been with me recently-burning skin

                                                                    -migraines

                                                                    -panic attacks

                                                                    -skin rashes

                                                                    -muscle cramps and twitches

                                                                    -nonstop racing heart

                                                                    -random pains have left

 

Overall, it's progress. 

 

If anyone needs me I will be checking my PM's.  If I come back early that  means my symptoms flared so I hope to catch up with you in a few days.  

       

[[Di...]]

All must b busier than me today! Well, I loathe to admit this, but u r my confidants. I've just found a dried pile of cat vomit under my bed...from the looks of it, been there awhile. Have I let my housekeeping slide? Yep, u betcha...I've since wandered round the house looking in corners & nooks. Cobwebs & dust. I'm realizing I'm getting the basics done but nothing more. I vow to come back swingin tomorrow! I've got to clean my house! I'm sure U'd love a detailed acct of the cat puke clean up, but I will spare u, my friends! 

 

Don't feel bad. That's happened to me. Last week my cat woke me by having a puke beside the bed. I remember thinking "aw crap - now I'll have to clean that up", and that was it - totally forgot about it because it was on the side of the bed I don't normally go. When I was vacuuming on the weekend, there is was, nice and dry and hard, which was actually a good thing because it was easier to clean up - see there's a silver lining to everything. Fortunately too, I have hard floors, so I don't have to worry about carpet stains.

 

I will readily admit I am not the OCD housecleaner I used to be. There was a time when I would spend nearly the whole day cleaning and polishing, and then I'd be totally worn out in the afternoon. Now I tend to split jobs. I'll do something one day and something else another day. Sometimes I'll get half way through a job and I'll get sidetracked - usually by BB..lol...

 

My attitude now is that if it looks okay on the surface, then that's good enough. The thing with housework is that it's never finished, so don't sweat the small stuff. When something really needs to be done, you'll do it.

[[Di...]]

Wait...final episode of Masterchef! I watch that. No final here! Did I miss!? Don't tell me who won!

 

It was the Aussie Masterchef........ I won't say who won in case other Aussies are reading this and they still have to watch it, but it wasn't who I wanted to win..... boooooo.

[[Di...]]

Hi Katz - Good to hear you're feeling better. Long may that last.... YOU HEAR THAT BENZOS!!!!

 

Hi Drew - Wow that 3 months has gone fast. You're doing great. Enjoy your few days off.

[[Sa...]]

All must b busier than me today! Well, I loathe to admit this, but u r my confidants. I've just found a dried pile of cat vomit under my bed...from the looks of it, been there awhile. Have I let my housekeeping slide? Yep, u betcha...I've since wandered round the house looking in corners & nooks. Cobwebs & dust. I'm realizing I'm getting the basics done but nothing more. I vow to come back swingin tomorrow! I've got to clean my house! I'm sure U'd love a detailed acct of the cat puke clean up, but I will spare u, my friends! 

 

Two things. Iggie...first, 4 o'clock is always my bewitching hour..like clockwork, no need to look at the clock. Always...second. You don't want to see my house, I'm not looking up or down right now, if it's not right in my line of vision it doesn't count the house will be wait! 

 

But Saga how on Earth could a civilized person miss a pile of cat puke!? 

 

Thank god Katz and DP chimed in to help me out here! I'm clearly uncivilized!  Cleaning my house is the last thing on my mind right now...other than the basics it'll happen eventually. DP is right, cat puke is much easier to pick up when it's dried...

 

[[...]]

 

 

DP I love bananas but hate milk - always have - but I swear its worth a try to get the sleep success you did!

 

 

 

Well, my good sleep pattern went totally out the window last night. I had one of those nights where I felt like I didn't sleep at all, but when I'd look at the clock something like an hour or two would have elasped, but it didn't feel it, so I must have been sleeping very lightly, and waking often.

 

It's probably (hopefully) just due to me having Thai for dinner last night. I'm not being daunted though because I know I'm not going to have 9 hours every night, and I'm not sure that I want that much sleep every night anyway. I'll be happy with 5-6 hours. Hopefully tonight I will just have a normal restful sleep night. Fingers crossed.

 

Not that this will make you feel any better but mine was crap too!  The milk (I think) combined with the unbelievably spicy dinner my daughter made had me running for the potty all night.  Milk never did agree with me    by the time morning rolled around I felt like I had been laying in bed for a week.  Sigh...........

 

Misery loves company . My sleep was crappy again last night too. WTF!!! 9 hours sleep one night and hardly anything for the next 2.

 

I have no idea what I want to do regarding the GVC. Maybe I'll keep doing it for another few days, but am I just delaying the inevitable? Maybe I should just stop now and take whatever punishment the Big V has in store for me just to get it over with ..... double sigh..

 

DP I feel your pain.  Is this the valium's last dying gasp, I wonder?  Predictably, I slept like a stone last night.  Good sleep, poor sleep, crappy sleep, rinse and repeat.  So...tonight I probably will not sleep at all. 

[[...]]

I have no idea what I want to do regarding the GVC. Maybe I'll keep doing it for another few days, but am I just delaying the inevitable? Maybe I should just stop now and take whatever punishment the Big V has in store for me just to get it over with

 

DP why not vape for a few more days? At least until your sleep returns? Then you can say you stepped off feeling okay and I bet the psychological boost will be big.

 

Just my thoughts, of course.

 

Okatz

 

And as usual they are good thoughts Okatz.  I am going until at least Thursday...............

[[...]]

Peeps with the sleep problems,

I want you to humor me and try alternate nostril breathing. I do it every night and the nights I don't, bad sleep returns.

 

Link:

 

http://www.yogajournal.com/health/2641?utm_source=MyYogaJournal&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=MyYogaJournal&utm_content=sidebar1link

 

(scroll to the bottom of the page if interested)

 

I'm willing to try anything once.  I will let you know!

[[...]]

All must b busier than me today! Well, I loathe to admit this, but u r my confidants. I've just found a dried pile of cat vomit under my bed...from the looks of it, been there awhile. Have I let my housekeeping slide? Yep, u betcha...I've since wandered round the house looking in corners & nooks. Cobwebs & dust. I'm realizing I'm getting the basics done but nothing more. I vow to come back swingin tomorrow! I've got to clean my house! I'm sure U'd love a detailed acct of the cat puke clean up, but I will spare u, my friends! 

 

Don't feel bad. That's happened to me. Last week my cat woke me by having a puke beside the bed. I remember thinking "aw crap - now I'll have to clean that up", and that was it - totally forgot about it because it was on the side of the bed I don't normally go. When I was vacuuming on the weekend, there is was, nice and dry and hard, which was actually a good thing because it was easier to clean up - see there's a silver lining to everything. Fortunately too, I have hard floors, so I don't have to worry about carpet stains.

 

I will readily admit I am not the OCD housecleaner I used to be. There was a time when I would spend nearly the whole day cleaning and polishing, and then I'd be totally worn out in the afternoon. Now I tend to split jobs. I'll do something one day and something else another day. Sometimes I'll get half way through a job and I'll get sidetracked - usually by BB..lol...

 

My attitude now is that if it looks okay on the surface, then that's good enough. The thing with housework is that it's never finished, so don't sweat the small stuff. When something really needs to be done, you'll do it.

 

A sparkling clean house is the sign of a wasted life 

 

Try as I might to keep it vacuumed up, you cannot leave my house without wearing a dusting of cat hair 

[[...]]

Hi Workers,

Here is my latest update.  I am beginning to think of publishing this boring vapor caper log so I can read it nightly.  If anything can put me to sleep this should!

 

- Three days before my last actual cut I started feeling the tightness in the spot on my back just above my shoulder blades.  It was very minor and mostly just an annoyance like a sore muscle would be.

Day 1 of Vapor Caper - tightness there, no worse no better, sleep not perfect but not worse

Day 2 of Vapor Caper - no change

Day 3 of Vapor Caper - no change

Day 4 of Vapor Caper - no change

Day 5 of Vapor Caper - tightness did not start until late in the day and only lasted a little while.  sleep was poor but probably had more to do with the thunderstorm directly overhead and my daughters cat wailing in the hallway being a Skeerdy Kat, and not benzo withdrawal.

Day 6 of Vapor Caper  - tightness only for a little while in the evening.  Fell asleep between 10:30 pm and 11:00 pm, woke after 1 am, fell back asleep until after 5am

Over all, I feel no better and no worse than before I took my last dose which I am taking as a positive.

Day 7 of Vapor Caper - no tightness or side effects at all.  Sleep very crappy but I was and still am suffering digestive distress from a ridiculously spicy meal my daughter made. Guts grumbling and visiting the potty all night.  Boo!

Day 8 of Vapor Caper - no tightness or side effects at all.  I slept!  (here the clouds part in the darkened sky, the sun emerges bright and warm and the choir begins to sing!) about 6 - 7 hours, not sure. 

 

Tonight I stop swirling the syringe and will continue on just stirring the spoon.

 

I hope everyone has a good evening and a wonderful night of sleep!

[Guest [in...]]

You guys are SWELL!!  Thanks for keeping it real! What's wrong with a little cat puke, esp dried, and some cobwebs & dust!? I've got more important things to do! 

[[...]]

Hey Eliz

Congratulations! Looks like you're doing great.

Bart

[[Lo...]]

How are my working folks doing? Praying your day is light and symptom free :-)

[[...]]

Good Afternoon Workers,

Quiet here today!

 

Next Installment of the Great Vapor Caper

 

- Three days before my last actual cut I started feeling the tightness in the spot on my back just above my shoulder blades.  It was very minor and mostly just an annoyance like a sore muscle would be.

Day 1 of Vapor Caper - tightness there, no worse no better, sleep not perfect but not worse

Day 2 of Vapor Caper - no change

Day 3 of Vapor Caper - no change

Day 4 of Vapor Caper - no change

Day 5 of Vapor Caper - tightness did not start until late in the day and only lasted a little while.  sleep was poor but probably had more to do with the thunderstorm directly overhead and my daughter's cat wailing in the hallway being a Skeerdy Kat, and not benzo withdrawal.

Day 6 of Vapor Caper  - tightness only for a little while in the evening.  Fell asleep between 10:30 pm and 11:00 pm, woke after 1 am, fell back asleep until after 5am

Over all, I feel no better and no worse than before I took my last dose which I am taking as a positive.

Day 7 of Vapor Caper - no tightness or side effects at all.  Sleep very crappy but I was and still am suffering digestive distress from a ridiculously spicy meal my daughter made. Guts grumbling and visiting the potty all night.  Boo!

Day 8 of Vapor Caper - no tightness or side effects at all.  I slept!  (here the clouds part in the darkened sky, the sun emerges bright and warm and the choir begins to sing!) about 6 - 7 hours, not sure.

Day 9 of Vapor Caper - No tightness or side effects at all.  Sleep so/so but not horrible.  Stopped dipping the syringe and am now only stirring the solution with the spoon and licking it off so 50% cut in Vapors as of yesterday.  Hoping this does not cause the tightness to come back but I have to finish some time so I am marching forward.

 

Today so far is side effect free and I am hoping that continues through Thursday so I can stop on Friday.

 

Thanks for the encouragement Bart!

 

I hope everyone else is having a good day

 

Eliz

[[...]]

Sounds great Eliz!! Hoping your jump is uneventful!!

 

:smitten:

[[or...]]

Just checking in, workers. A long hard day.

 

eliz and DP I am holding my breath for you. Hope things go smoothly on the way to Jump Day.

 

Okatz

 

 

[[Di...]]

I think my sleep is improving. I did actually go to sleep on my own last night, but I woke about an hour later. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to go back to sleep, so I took half a doxy and went to sleep straight away, so I may not have needed it. So my dose of doxy is getting less each night. Maybe tonight I won't need it at all. I'm considering not doing any Vapor Caper today, and declaring myself DONE - but I want at least a few good days under my belt before I do that. Stay tuned.....

[[jj...]]

Hello working threaders. Just doing a quick check in myself. Sounds like the vapor caperers are doing well. Hope everyone is having a decent work week. Nothing has changed for me.

[[...]]

I think my sleep is improving. I did actually go to sleep on my own last night, but I woke about an hour later. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to go back to sleep, so I took half a doxy and went to sleep straight away, so I may not have needed it. So my dose of doxy is getting less each night. Maybe tonight I won't need it at all. I'm considering not doing any Vapor Caper today, and declaring myself DONE - but I want at least a few good days under my belt before I do that. Stay tuned.....

 

Hey DP

I did my little fuming (vapor caper) every other day for a while before stopping. I also did a few "rescue" fumes and one of my one time up-doses over the first 6 weeks off. I have no idea if it helped things end more gradually or it was just useless paranoia. I suspect whatever you do at this point will work out just fine. Healing is still happening.

 

You're there girl!

 

Bart

 

 

 

 

 

[[Di...]]

Thanks BMan. I actually considered the alternate day fuming. I did do a dip and lick this afternoon, but I might skip tomorrow and see what happens.

 

I've gotten really lazy though. Instead of dipping and licking my syringe, I'm using my finger now - less washing up...lol....

[[Sm...]]

I think my sleep is improving. I did actually go to sleep on my own last night, but I woke about an hour later. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to go back to sleep, so I took half a doxy and went to sleep straight away, so I may not have needed it. So my dose of doxy is getting less each night. Maybe tonight I won't need it at all. I'm considering not doing any Vapor Caper today, and declaring myself DONE - but I want at least a few good days under my belt before I do that. Stay tuned.....

 

Hooray!!

Oh DP. You give hope to us all. DONE is a damn good wood. I like it. I can't wait to say it myself.

I'm well and truly tuned in