Tapering off Ativan Support Thread

[Guest [ba...]]

I think I've seen 0.3 ml syringes.  There are also Hamilton syringes and micropipettes in nearly any volume that you want, but they cost $$.

 

In reality, there's little reason to worry about such accuracy.  Reasonably careful use of a 1 ml syringe with 0.01 ml graduations is probably more accurate than your local pharmacy.

[[Ho...]]

Hey guys!

 

Just an update -

 

I feel like I definitely stabilized on the liquid (for a bit). I had a great weekend then yesterday I started having nausea and did not sleep well. I eventually took a 1mg melatonin to help. I have felt anxious and nauseous since then.

 

Could something I ate triggered this or do you think I’m still adjusting to the liquid? I’m holding at .075mg 3 times a day - .225mg/day.

 

Confusing since I was doing pretty well. It’s making me question my compound liquid - I mix it like crazy but did it stop working? Did I leave it in the car to long (not too hot - normal temp on Sunday). I’m feeling discouraged wondering why this random bout of yuck.

[Guest [ba...]]

I think your current dose is right on the edge of your comfort (ish) zone.  So maybe it wouldn't take much to cause you to have a wave of sorts.  Maybe something you ate.  Maybe something else.    Try not to add anxiety worrying about formulations.  I think you know what to do, and can trust yourself. 

 

Let's hope this is just a little bump in the road and that you'll sleep better soon.

 

If you have some doubt about the liquid from the pharmacy, talk to the pharmacist and explain how warm it might have gotten.  To my knowledge benzos are pretty stable.  It takes a fair bit of heat to break them down.  There are studies on this stuff.  For example - Lorazepam stored for 60 days in an EMS vehicle (average temp 89F) still had around 95% of it's potency (reference below).  I don't think an hour or two in a slightly warm car will do much damage.

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4272820/

 

Obviously, you could switch back to pills, but it seemed like you had found a pretty good equivalence in dosage. 

 

If you suspect food might be the culprit (some people definitely have more sensitivities during withdrawal), consider keeping a food log.  Above all, try not to worry about it.  Be calm.  Yuck happens.  Whatever it is will pass in time.

[[Ho...]]

I think your current dose is right on the edge of your comfort (ish) zone.  So maybe it wouldn't take much to cause you to have a wave of sorts.  Maybe something you ate.  Maybe something else.    Try not to add anxiety worrying about formulations.  I think you know what to do, and can trust yourself. 

 

Let's hope this is just a little bump in the road and that you'll sleep better soon.

 

If you have some doubt about the liquid from the pharmacy, talk to the pharmacist and explain how warm it might have gotten.  To my knowledge benzos are pretty stable.  It takes a fair bit of heat to break them down.  There are studies on this stuff.  For example - Lorazepam stored for 60 days in an EMS vehicle (average temp 89F) still had around 95% of it's potency (reference below).  I don't think an hour or two in a slightly warm car will do much damage.

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4272820/

 

Obviously, you could switch back to pills, but it seemed like you had found a pretty good equivalence in dosage. 

 

If you suspect food might be the culprit (some people definitely have more sensitivities during withdrawal), consider keeping a food log.  Above all, try not to worry about it.  Be calm.  Yuck happens.  Whatever it is will pass in time.

 

THANK YOU! For always helping me and reassuring me. I will call my pharmacist in the morning to see if it would have affected anything. I ate a lot of sugar Tuesday (but haven’t really had an issue with it before?) and was in the sun for an hour or so and that’s when this started. Started with some anxiety/bouts of fear then stomach trouble (nausea then diarrhea today). Insomnia Tuesday night and now dealing with it again tonight.

 

The Ativan being in the car for a bit was Sunday. It’s easy to do the “mind hamster wheel” when things go yuck for no reason. And then when I took my dose tonight the “strawberry flavor” they put in it didn’t taste as strong so you know that made me think something was off. I wouldn’t think twice about it if I wasn’t feeling bad.

 

And the fear! Goodness. Sunday was blissful with no fear but as soon as symptoms arise, I go into this fear-based “I’ll never get through this” or “this will get worse” mindset.

 

It’s awful. I’ve been  reading success stories today to try and get me refocused. A good nights sleep and some stability would do wonders right now!

 

Praying for stability again. Really wanting to get at a good place with the liquid so I can continue my taper. This feels like a gut punch 

[[Ho...]]

Hmm...several hours later and something is off.

 

No sleep (even with melatonin) and bursts of adrenaline/anxiety that are one after another. So sleepy but quickly overcome with adrenaline and fear wave over my body.

 

My compound prescription came in 2 bottles (I guess that’s how they had to distribute). I will try my next dose with the other bottle until I can get in touch with the pharmacist.

 

Not really sure what else it could be at this point?

 

I DO NOT want to go back to pills  :'(

 

Could it also just be a wave/me trying to stabilize still? I want to have full confidence in the compound and I did until these symptoms came. UGH!

[[Ho...]]

I think your current dose is right on the edge of your comfort (ish) zone.  So maybe it wouldn't take much to cause you to have a wave of sorts.  Maybe something you ate.  Maybe something else.    Try not to add anxiety worrying about formulations.  I think you know what to do, and can trust yourself. 

 

Let's hope this is just a little bump in the road and that you'll sleep better soon.

 

If you have some doubt about the liquid from the pharmacy, talk to the pharmacist and explain how warm it might have gotten.  To my knowledge benzos are pretty stable.  It takes a fair bit of heat to break them down.  There are studies on this stuff.  For example - Lorazepam stored for 60 days in an EMS vehicle (average temp 89F) still had around 95% of it's potency (reference below).  I don't think an hour or two in a slightly warm car will do much damage.

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4272820/

 

Obviously, you could switch back to pills, but it seemed like you had found a pretty good equivalence in dosage. 

 

If you suspect food might be the culprit (some people definitely have more sensitivities during withdrawal), consider keeping a food log.  Above all, try not to worry about it.  Be calm.  Yuck happens.  Whatever it is will pass in time.

 

One other thing, I had a diet lemonade at the same time as ice cream on Tuesday. Could diet lemonade trigger something this brutal?

 

I’ve stuck to water pretty much this entire time.

 

I called my pharmacist - she doesn’t think leaving it in the car was a problem because to make it, they heated up the olive oil to 100 degrees before mixing with the Ativan.

 

Just trying to figure out what has triggered these severe symptoms and insomnia with the adrenaline throughout the night. UGH!

[Guest [ba...]]

Diet lemonade seems pretty mundane, BUT I became sensitive to a non-caloric sweetener during my withdrawal (sucralose), and it's commonly found in diet lemonades.  So now I use stevia-sweetened diet drinks.

 

So write that one down in your food log.  Maybe another diet beverage will rev you up in the future and you can compare notes.

[[Ho...]]

Diet lemonade seems pretty mundane, BUT I became sensitive to a non-caloric sweetener during my withdrawal (sucralose), and it's commonly found in diet lemonades.  So now I use stevia-sweetened diet drinks.

 

So write that one down in your food log.  Maybe another diet beverage will rev you up in the future and you can compare notes.

 

Laying up again tonight with insomnia. Im so exhausted but my brain feels like a raw nerve that won’t turn off. Burning in the back of my head/brain  and physical anxiety. As bad as I felt physically/mentally today, from about 5pm-9pm the mental brain burning/anxiety calmed down and I just felt like I was hit by a truck with body aches and exhaustion. I can handle that so I thought tonight would be better. Dosed off at 9:30, up at 10:30 and can’t sleep.

 

Rubbed some magnesium spray on my legs, took at 1mg melatonin. I’m so exhausted but I just can’t sleep. I’m being super mindful with meditation. Trying  not to panic over sleep, I just know how much I need it to help my other symptoms during the day.

 

I was so stable on the liquid. I haven’t had 3 nights straight of insomnia this entire journey.

What is happening?

[Guest [ba...]]

I don't know.  Maybe you could try a day with the pills instead of the liquid and see if that makes a noticeable difference. 

 

I don't know what else to think???  The liquid thing was working. 

[[Ho...]]

I don't know.  Maybe you could try a day with the pills instead of the liquid and see if that makes a noticeable difference. 

 

I don't know what else to think???  The liquid thing was working.

 

 

I HATE the thought of going back to pills after getting this far on liquid. I feel so defeated - mostly because this came out of nowhere after I was stable on liquid.

 

Here’s the only thing I can think causing it? What do you think?

1. Developed some sort of tolerance? Is this likely?

2. Hour each day in the sun on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday.

3. Lots of sugar/sucralose drink Sunday-Tuesday

4. My period is supposed to start in 5 days, could that cause this?

5. Liquid compound somehow failing me? Although unlikely?

 

I’m so confused. I think the hardest thing is that I don’t know the reason for this sudden onset of anxiety with insomnia.

 

Again, absolutely hate the thought of switching back to pills because it’s borderline impossible to cut those small crumbs.

 

Any encouragement/suggestions? 😭

[Guest [ba...]]

That's informative...

 

Remember me saying that you were dosing near the edge of your comfort zone, and that something had seemed to have nudged you?  Could very well be #4.  Progesterone levels drop the final week of your cycle (you know this much better than I).  That would seem to correlate with the timing of your sleep going to cr*p. 

 

That definitely causes some of the women here to feel the effects.  There's a big support group for cycle issues.  Might well also explain why the cross-over worked well at the onset since progesterone levels would have been rising.

 

Has your monthly cycling had much of an impact on your benzo withdrawal to date?  Obviously, this affects some much much more than others.

 

Might also be a good idea to watch your sugar intake.  Some people seem to get a little hypoglycemic during withdrawal.  That could add to a feeling of shakiness, weakness although I don't think it would be keeping you awake at night.  Many people reduce sugar intake (some almost completely).  I wouldn't recommend avoiding it altogether, but perhaps try to eliminate spikes.

[[Ho...]]

That's informative...

 

Remember me saying that you were dosing near the edge of your comfort zone, and that something had seemed to have nudged you?  Could very well be #4.  Progesterone levels drop the final week of your cycle (you know this much better than I).  That would seem to correlate with the timing of your sleep going to cr*p. 

 

That definitely causes some of the women here to feel the effects.  There's a big support group for cycle issues.  Might well also explain why the cross-over worked well at the onset since progesterone levels would have been rising.

 

Has your monthly cycling had much of an impact on your benzo withdrawal to date?  Obviously, this affects some much much more than others.

 

Might also be a good idea to watch your sugar intake.  Some people seem to get a little hypoglycemic during withdrawal.  That could add to a feeling of shakiness, weakness although I don't think it would be keeping you awake at night.  Many people reduce sugar intake (some almost completely).  I wouldn't recommend avoiding it altogether, but perhaps try to eliminate spikes.

 

In the beginning, no. After each failed crossover to liquid, leading up to my period following was bad. Not as bad as this though with my sleep/stomach/anxiety being SO affected. Example, last period was after I switched back to pills. Leading up to it, headaches/fatigue and overall poo feeling but no insomnia. A little wired but nothing like this!

 

I ovulated on the 30th and that’s the day I switched my final dose. I felt great during ovulation, actually had a sex drive, energy, etc although I did have nausea/tummy upset from the liquid. I can handle that though. Sorry TMI I know.

 

My stomach now is messed up too. I’m not eating a lot, nausea/pain almost like gastritis in my upper stomach and also colon is sensitive to the touch (after diarrhea episodes Wednesday). Wonder if this affects anxiety/brain and insomnia too.

 

Okay, starting to feel better that hormones may be the cause.

 

I am not messing around with sugar anymore and nothing other than water. I wasn’t sensitive to it in the beginning but it’s not worth it if that in conjunction with hormones caused this! Good grief.

 

Any suggestions for insomnia other than just riding it out?

 

[Guest [ba...]]

You can try benadryl or unisom for insomnia.  They're considered pretty safe.  Both worked a little for me.  Melatonin is fine (it did nothing for me).  I was also known to use cannabis for insomnia (obviously not appropriate for everybody).

[[Ha...]]

Hopefortomorrow, some light exercise (walking for 20-30 minutes) about 2-3 hours before bedtime has often helped me sleep a little better.

 

Badsocref, I never knew that about the hypoglycemia symptoms but it definitely jibes with something I have been experiencing since I started my taper.  Somewhere about mid-afternoon (between lunch and dinner) I often start to feel crashy, shaky, and extra brain fogged (what I describe as greyed out).  A little snack helps a little.

 

Haimona

[[Di...]]

JuJuBi I have followed a lot of your journey... I too was put on Xanax because of a side effect to a med my Dr put me on.  After figuring out I had become dependent on Xanax she started my taper then ripped me off the Xanax straight on to Ativan.  I had a pretty fast taper in the beginning felt good at first then wham.  I saw in your signature where you either held or went very slow from Aug thru Dec did that help you to stabilize more?  I have been holding at .573 for seven weeks now not sure if I should continue to hold or start back my DLMT.  I have a lot of life stressors right now having a bad day today.  Thanks for any input.

 

[[Ju...]]

Dianedeedee

 

I was hit with an evil hard wave in Aug and Sept.  I lasted 28 days of almost non stop anxiety.  It was my body and brain telling me to slow down so I did.  I held for about 2 weeks then went on.  I tried going only 4% month and things gradually seemed to ease. I popped it back up to 6.5% and my symptoms began to increase.  I have settled on 3-4% a month reduction.  I still get hit with some symptoms but I seem to have many more good days than bad.  Not sure if it is the low % reduction or being on a lower dose.  Or maybe it is both.  The way I am reducing now is more like a cut and hold really.  I reduce .003 about every 10-14 days.  As I get lower staying at the low % gets tricky. 

 

Some things I do every day-Many are like lifting a ton

Positive affirmations. I repeat. I am Healthy, I am well, I am happy, I go this. I have a few bible verses I throw in there. I actually have this written and taped to my mirror. So I say it in the morning and when ever I wash my hands or brush my teeth and sometimes in between. And I say it with a smile no matter how forced.

I try to make a joke a day and laugh no matter how bad I feel.

 

Exercise-I try to get into a routine but this one I struggle with. Once I do it I feel great but it is like lifting 1000 lbs sometimes to motivate.

 

Shower and dress by 9- except on my days off work I cheat on this one.

 

At least two household chores however small.

 

And I picked up a craft.  Crochet the counting helps like a type of mindfulness.

 

I have some heavy life stressors tight now myself.  It is hard to avoid these but we have to give ourselves as much of a break as we can and handle our CNS with care.

 

We will get through this.

 

JuJuBi

 

 

[[Di...]]

Dianedeedee

 

I was hit with an evil hard wave in Aug and Sept.  I lasted 28 days of almost non stop anxiety.  It was my body and brain telling me to slow down so I did.  I held for about 2 weeks then went on.  I tried going only 4% month and things gradually seemed to ease. I popped it back up to 6.5% and my symptoms began to increase.  I have settled on 3-4% a month reduction.  I still get hit with some symptoms but I seem to have many more good days than bad.  Not sure if it is the low % reduction or being on a lower dose.  Or maybe it is both.  The way I am reducing now is more like a cut and hold really.  I reduce .003 about every 10-14 days.  As I get lower staying at the low % gets tricky. 

 

Some things I do every day-Many are like lifting a ton

Positive affirmations. I repeat. I am Healthy, I am well, I am happy, I go this. I have a few bible verses I throw in there. I actually have this written and taped to my mirror. So I say it in the morning and when ever I wash my hands or brush my teeth and sometimes in between. And I say it with a smile no matter how forced.

I try to make a joke a day and laugh no matter how bad I feel.

 

Exercise-I try to get into a routine but this one I struggle with. Once I do it I feel great but it is like lifting 1000 lbs sometimes to motivate.

 

Shower and dress by 9- except on my days off work I cheat on this one.

 

At least two household chores however small.

 

And I picked up a craft.  Crochet the counting helps like a type of mindfulness.

 

I have some heavy life stressors tight now myself.  It is hard to avoid these but we have to give ourselves as much of a break as we can and handle our CNS with care.

 

We will get through this.

 

JuJuBi

 

Thank you Jujubi I needed to hear all that you said.  This is just so hard but I do need to have a better routine.  Thank you so much for replying back to me.     

I am so sorry that you are having life stressors now too.  Hugs!

[[Ju...]]

Dianedeedee

 

This is very hard.  We have to remember to be good to ourselves. Give yourself credit for how far you have come. Pat yourself on the back for even the littlest accomplishment. Rest when we can.

 

[[Di...]]

Thank you JuJuBi for your words of encouragement.  I have tried everything I can think of to not suffer thru this but I have to accept that its not going to happen so I might as well bite the bullet.

[[2c...]]

Dianedeedee and jujubi

 

Thanks for sharing your encouraging thoughts.  I haven’t posted in quite some time on this thread but I check it everyday

 

I also try to maintain some kind of daily routine and find it really helps me even if it seems like the hardest thing ever.  I work part-time from home but try to keep some kind of a schedule. I also have some friends that I Zoom with almost every day which is a lifesaver .

 

I also have had to do some physical therapy for a back issue and I try really hard to do them everyday. They are mostly stretching exercises and I do feel better when I do them at least partially.

 

We all have bad days and sometimes it seems that’s all we have.  I try to appreciate every time I have a window even if it’s a few minutes but it’s also been hard for me to accept. I still have times when I am angry about the whole situation but realistically I know it doesn’t help to go down that road.

 

Hang in there guys!

 

 

[[Di...]]

Dianedeedee and jujubi

 

Thanks for sharing your encouraging thoughts.  I haven’t posted in quite some time on this thread but I check it everyday

 

I also try to maintain some kind of daily routine and find it really helps me even if it seems like the hardest thing ever.  I work part-time from home but try to keep some kind of a schedule. I also have some friends that I Zoom with almost every day which is a lifesaver .

 

I also have had to do some physical therapy for a back issue and I try really hard to do them everyday. They are mostly stretching exercises and I do feel better when I do them at least partially.

 

We all have bad days and sometimes it seems that’s all we have.  I try to appreciate every time I have a window even if it’s a few minutes but it’s also been hard for me to accept. I still have times when I am angry about the whole situation but realistically I know it doesn’t help to go down that road.

 

Hang in there guys!

 

2cats good to hear from you.  We have to keep hanging on...yes some days sure are hard.  Acceptance has been one of the hardest things for me.

Appreciate you!

[[Ho...]]

Hey guys!

 

Just an update. Sleep is back to restful (normal) with no help of meds. When it got really bad. I took a crumb of unisom. It does make me feel groggy the next day but I was desperate.

 

I also completely changed my diet. No chocolate, sugar, artificial sweeteners. None of this bothered me before but I had a good night of sleep, had a healthy, clean granola bar with unsweetened chocolate chips and it kept me up that next night. So I decided it’s not worth it right now.

 

Starting my period did seem to help, as well.

 

Anyways, stabilizing on sleep feels so much better. Any suggestions on how long I should hold here before doing a micro taper? I do have several things I was to me okay for the weekend of May 7th-May 9th. Should I hold until after that?

 

With my history (if you’ve followed along  ), how much should I cut a month doing a DLMT?

 

JuJu - thank you so much for your post! I am the queen of distraction. My whole life is currently distracting myself from how bad I feel sometimes. Also, a lot of prayer. The strength God gives me through this is incredible. When I get overwhelmed or scared, I just remember how far He’s carried me. There’s no way I could do this with my own strength.

 

Dianedeedee, acceptance in the beginning was the hardest for me. I still struggle some days and think “I should just stop - I could be one of those people that heal in 2 weeks” but in all reality, that’s the worst thing we can do. The best thing is to accept that this is our journey and we will grow and be so much better (even then before meds) when we get to the other side. I’m so sorry this happened to you like it did. I was placed on it due to a reaction from another med, as well - just made it so much worse. You are not alone and it WILL get better.

[[Di...]]

Hey guys!

 

Just an update. Sleep is back to restful (normal) with no help of meds. When it got really bad. I took a crumb of unisom. It does make me feel groggy the next day but I was desperate.

 

I also completely changed my diet. No chocolate, sugar, artificial sweeteners. None of this bothered me before but I had a good night of sleep, had a healthy, clean granola bar with unsweetened chocolate chips and it kept me up that next night. So I decided it’s not worth it right now.

 

Starting my period did seem to help, as well.

 

Anyways, stabilizing on sleep feels so much better. Any suggestions on how long I should hold here before doing a micro taper? I do have several things I was to me okay for the weekend of May 7th-May 9th. Should I hold until after that?

 

With my history (if you’ve followed along  ), how much should I cut a month doing a DLMT?

 

JuJu - thank you so much for your post! I am the queen of distraction. My whole life is currently distracting myself from how bad I feel sometimes. Also, a lot of prayer. The strength God gives me through this is incredible. When I get overwhelmed or scared, I just remember how far He’s carried me. There’s no way I could do this with my own strength.

 

Dianedeedee, acceptance in the beginning was the hardest for me. I still struggle some days and think “I should just stop - I could be one of those people that heal in 2 weeks” but in all reality, that’s the worst thing we can do. The best thing is to accept that this is our journey and we will grow and be so much better (even then before meds) when we get to the other side. I’m so sorry this happened to you like it did. I was placed on it due to a reaction from another med, as well - just made it so much worse. You are not alone and it WILL get better.

 

Hope happy your sleep is better.  Thank you for the words of encouragement.  ❤

[[Ho...]]

Hey guys! I’m coming here instead of advice on other threads because reading other stories gets me fearful and too much advice is overwhelming.

 

So, I’ve been stable on liquid compound for 5 days now. I started the crossover to liquid on 3/23 so it has been about a month.

 

I am now finding myself in a state of fear about tapering. I’m not sure when/how much to taper.

 

You see some people do well with 20% cuts a month and others who can only cut 3% a month. How do I know where I fit here?

 

I need some good advice. May 8th is an important weekend for me but also, getting off this medication is important to me, as well. (And stay as functional as possible, of course)

 

Should I hold here until after that weekend or do a small decrease? Maybe .01ml each week? That would be a 1.5% cut in 3 weeks.

 

I just don’t know how to plan my taper at this point and the previous symptom fears are coming into play here. Are the waves/symptoms lighter with a LMT? If so, that may help my fear some.

 

Any planning assistance (without my fear fog) would be so helpful.

 

Thank you all so much!

[[Su...]]

Hi,

 

I am on the Ativan journey with you!!!  Did rapid taper and failed.  Just reinstated to 125 morning and night to start