The Long Hold Support Group

[[Ca...]]

Hi Girls ,

 

Just a bit of hope tonight...I saw a benzowise psychiatrist tonight . Somebody recommended by a friend of a friend... well I didn’t had to wait for months before an appointment. And I felt understood !

 

He helped several people with benzo withdrawal... told me that for some it is more difficult than for other . Also as I have cut on low doses it hit me hard because low is more difficult of course.

 

He s going to help me to go through this . Trying to keep functional.

 

Thanks Lord for listening my prayers. Hope the rest of my journey won’t be that bad.

 

By the way are we the unlucky ones here ? Or is it because people take years to wean of benzo , like a bit of pill here and a bit of pill there...wondering

 

 

[[Di...]]

Carla so glad you found a benzo wise dr.  Keep us posted.

[Guest [...]]

Holy uteruses Batman Aunty Flo is in a bad mood this month. Oh Lordy 

 

Shayna - you crack me up and put a smile on my face!!

:laugh:

 

Flo will have been difficult as you were tapering, is my guess!

 

Winnie

 

Naw good Winnie x I’m glad it gave a a giggle x

 

Winnie I didn’t recognize u! U look so different (ur avatar) 

 

I changed it after 2 of my posts ended up on that cesspool of madness site.

Didn't want that turkey to recognize me, seems like he was glued to me.

So no more nice picture of our gorgeous dog.

 

Glad Flo was behaving, I'm terrified of mine in a few weeks. 

[[Au...]]

Thanks again for your reply Marie.

Bodies are so individual, I see so many people do well on Valium. It's a shame it didn’t work for me, in theory using longer acting benzos makes sense.

 

I’m so scared off by my experience I’m willing to stick to the devil I know Ativan. I was cutting and holding 1/4 tablet beforehand and would suffer for approx 3 weeks so I figure DMT might work rather than a large cut. But who knows.

 

Would be nice to get just a glimmer of hope that I’m on my way to stabalising.

I didn’t updose on the Ativan because I’m so stubborn and now it’s been nearly 3 weeks since the Valium taper ended. Just hope I’ve done the right thing even though I didn’t go about it the right way.

 

Carla, you’ll have to keep up posted on what your new psychiatrist recommends.

 

[[Ca...]]

Aussiegal Im sorry you are suffering so much... you story seams so unfortunate when I read your signature...seams you were paradoxical on Ativan since day one ?

 

Did you take benzo previously in your life ?

 

The other didn’t helped after your first taper ?

 

Praying for you,

 

trying to stabilize to my updose from last week and doc said we will wait few weeks before switching to a long life benzo.. prazepam is more used here

[[ki...]]

Winnie, that website is horrific. I stumbled upon it while researching something and it made my anxiety skyrocket.

 

I hope you ladies are all doing OK. I made it past ovulation with no insomnia and it was such a huge relief. I also ovulated earlier in this cycle than last, so hoping my long cycle last time was an anomaly.

 

Sending you all love and light. ❤️

[[Au...]]

Carla,

Are you feeling any better since your up dose?

You’ve been holding for while so I hope you’re getting some relief...

 

I used Ativan years ago for 1 month and had no problem with it and came off over 1 month with some w/d but manageable.

 

When I came off it in June 2019 it was horrific! I ended up in a psych unit for 3 months where they were not benzo wise, polydrugged me, kept telling me it was anxiety, held me down, threatened to put in a cold shower. Not talk to me. Make me stay in my room 24/7. Not sure if the meds or the trauma of the way I was treated in there but ended up with a severe movement disorder. What followed was even more horrific... I was misdiagnosed with agitated depression and given forced ECT.

I’m really sick now since the Valium taper but there is no way I’m ever going into a hospital again.

 

It’s so hard to just hold when you feel so desperate and uncomfortable.

 

 

 

Sorry for the over sharing people...

 

[[Be...]]

 

 

I know everyone is different but just curious to know how long people held before seeing improvement in symptoms when they tapered too quickly.

 

 

 

 

It took me over 2 months to stabilize, when I reinstated after a rapid taper suggested on a bad forum I will never use again, after I found Benzo Buddies.  I was tapering Valium that I crossed over to from Klonopin.  Oh, and I crossed over faster than I should, didn't folllow Ashton's Prtocol. While for me, it worked great, I recommend that others NOT do that. I was the exception, I got lucky I guess. I just functioned better on Valium, was happy to ditch the Klonopin.

[[ho...]]

Hi BB’s -

Always glad to see you guys 

 

Carla- I am so glad you have a benzo wise doc and you are moving forward with a plan  :clap:

 

Aussie - I am so surprised you didn’t updose to compensate for the Valium, hey...more power to you   You are this far out now, I think you should start to stabilize soon....I said, “I think”.....And when you do, moving forward with a DMT is going to be so much better.

 

I’m over here just sitting on the couch and chilling......feeling pretty good today, a little tired , but over all pretty good.  That hold was the best thing I did.  And now the DLMT is the BEST!

 

Praying for those that need comfort and stabilizing right now

 

Marie

[[Di...]]

Thank you Marie your posts always help me. ❤

[[ho...]]

Thank you Marie your posts always help me. ❤

 

You’re welcome....I feel the same 

 

Marie

[[Au...]]

Thanks everyone for your input.

Benzolotti - I’ve read you also suffer from Akathesia. Any advice? I read a link on your thread that had all the meds that could cause it or aggravate it further. Have you found anything that helps?

 

[[Ca...]]

Oh Aussie, I’m so sorry for your story it is horrific . You are very brave. Can I ask you how old are you?

 

 

Lottie, when you did stabilize over 2 months were you feeling back to normal...?

[[Be...]]

Thanks everyone for your input.

Benzolotti - I’ve read you also suffer from Akathesia. Any advice? I read a link on your thread that had all the meds that could cause it or aggravate it further. Have you found anything that helps?

 

I'm not sure where you read that, I have not had Akathesia. but have posted on threads with others I know who do. I also don't recall posting a link of meds, I don't know any meds that cause it. Perhaps you have me confused with someone else. If you search Akathesia, you will find a lot of Buddies who have this and discuss it quite a bit. There are other Lottis on this board, perhaps you saw one of their posts?

[[Be...]]

Oh Aussie, I’m so sorry for your story it is horrific . You are very brave. Can I ask you how old are you?

 

 

Lottie, when you did stabilize over 2 months were you feeling back to normal...?

 

Normal and stable, as many will tell you, are two different things. Stable means you are having minor symptoms and are fairly functional. I hadn't felt normal since bfore I first took Klonopin. But I felt closer to normal ditching it and switching to Valium. I had more clarity and my executive functioning skills improved.

[[Au...]]

BenzoLottie,

Sorry I’ve confused you with someone else. I read the meds in an article from a link, not from BB members.

 

Benzo brain! My apologies

[[Ca...]]

Lottie...by normal I mean not suffering.

 

Before my crash I cut two times and was feeling normal the next week....

 

I took benzo for anxiety disorder but I never took enough to be anxiety free. I became anxiety feee with therapy and hard work. I was feeling good in January , my life was becoming « normal » again

And now I have to go through all this... I’m so fed up

[[Be...]]

BenzoLottie,

Sorry I’ve confused you with someone else. I read the meds in an article from a link, not from BB members.

 

Benzo brain! My apologies

 

It's okay. Bemzo Brain certainly effects us.

[[Be...]]

Lottie...by normal I mean not suffering.

 

Before my crash I cut two times and was feeling normal the next week....

 

I took benzo for anxiety disorder but I never took enough to be anxiety free. I became anxiety feee with therapy and hard work. I was feeling good in January , my life was becoming « normal » again

And now I have to go through all this... I’m so fed up

 

I was not normal after two months, just stable. I was still suffering, but it was manageable. I wish I could feel normal, but I know that won't happen until I'm finally free of the benzo shackles. I know my life is going to be a living hell, thanks to benzoW/D.

[[Ca...]]

Lottie... I’m sorry for you.

 

Im trying to not compare myself but this makes me freak out and want to say you know what , I will keep my benzo and live my life , who knows if I will be alive tomorrow anyway.... :'(

[[Be...]]

Lottie... I’m sorry for you.

 

Im trying to not compare myself but this makes me freak out and want to say you know what , I will keep my benzo and live my life , who knows if I will be alive tomorrow anyway.... :'(

 

 

I don't want to keep my benzo, I had no life after I took the first Klonopin, it made my Autism so much worse, and did nothing for my supposed anxiety, because mine was all Hypomagnesium related. I will only get to live my life after I get off the benzo. I've had to accept this is my reality, and try not to freak out because it just makes me feel worse. I feel nothing but contempt for the doctor who did this to me, My Endocrinologist was flabbergasted that this happened to me, and furious at the doctor who insisted I had GAD and needed benzos. My Endo said I didn't have GAD, I had Hypomagnesemia! 

 

I've had days I ask God to take me from this earth because I don't want to go through this anymore. I've had days where I want to give up and stop trying. I've had days where I think I should just learn to live with the benzos. On BB we call these "Benzo Lies". The benzos aren't going to give up without a battle. I'm not letting them win. I've declared war, and I'm not going down without a fight

[[bu...]]

Hello, I've been on Klonopin for 31 years and started water tapering over a month ago. I was in tolerance when I started my taper but actually started feeling better at first. Now, though, I'm doing worse and wondering if there is any benefit to holding while in tolerance?

[[ho...]]

Hello, I've been on Klonopin for 31 years and started water tapering over a month ago. I was in tolerance when I started my taper but actually started feeling better at first. Now, though, I'm doing worse and wondering if there is any benefit to holding while in tolerance?

 

Hi- It would be helpful if you would create a signature so we know a little more about your wean process.  And your water taper is it with alcohol too? What % are you reducing?  Holds seem to work for most people and the tolerance seems to be up for debate too. So am guess I would suggest holding and see how you do.  It usually takes a little while to see improvements, so hang in there with it, if you do decide to hold.

 

Marie.

[[ho...]]

Carla - I know that you feel so bad and that giving into the benzo feels like it will fix this mess, but it won’t in the long run.  Lottie is so right!!! We have to look at this as war.  We are warriors and we CAN do this battle.  It is a battle for our lives.

 

Hang in there 

 

Marie

[[Fi...]]

Morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

Thank you Olive,Suzy and everyone who wished me well.l am so happy to be over the first hurdle and so far l am ok can't complain.l just take it a day at a time and so far so good.l know what has eased my transition has been keeping everything slow and steady and as much as long holds never appeared to help as much as l would have liked l knew this is when l would reap the benefits and l am happy to say l was right.love you.X

  Morning Twiny yes l am off thank God 🙏. Have to say l can't promise to stay too much longer however l know you will get there.l have trained you well and you can do this.I have been on this site for four years and l think it's nearly time l spread my wings.Not yet ofcourse so don't worry l will be here for a while.

How is your son?ls he still drinking?l hope he isn't and things have settled down on that front.Glad you got the vaccine you will soon be running out and about with your mask on and social distancing ofcourse.

I am ok the wrist is coming along nicely and probably in about 2 or 3 weeks l will go back to work.Still in lockdown with no end in sight getting a bit bored with it all l have to say.

You can't get into Ireland because of covid so never you bother yourself twiny 😂🤔😜.As for the drones l still wear my tinfoil hat so you will be wasting your time.Now you enjoy your day and give my boys a hug from me.love you my lST X

 

Hi Stut,

 

From what I read here, you are now off benozs. Congratulations on achieving that goal.  I also understand taking it one day at a time now that you are off. It's a huge achievement.

 

I've now been off for close to two months and I am doing well. I've had a few days if feeling some symptoms but nothing compares to when I first was tapering.  It does get much better.

 

Wishing you continued steady healing Stut. And for everyone else here who is still tapering, you can do this and it will be worth it.

 

Final Healing