Discussion: Four Phases of Withdrawal-Where Are You?

[[il...]]

Thanks, Sofa, for your dedication to help others along as you're venturing through your own version of hell. You're an amazing asset to the BB forum.

 

I just want to throw out there for anyone whom it may speak to -- the most confusing part of this is, personally, worrying about reaching the finish line. I've reached new heights over the last week. I've been out and about, socialized, cooked and swam at the pool, all with relative ease. But, my visual distortions cause me to think I have macular degeneration and my mind is still on speed. So although I may be reaching a "new realm" of function, and I am so grateful that I am - it's scary because my current sxs are very disturbing still.

 

Blessings to all on this journey of recovery!

 

Never again

[[so...]]

Never,

 

Sweetheart, I can relate so readily to your fears of having something wrong with me now that will never eventually go away.  Boy, do I struggle with this!

 

It is an intrusive thought.  Nothing more.  Look at all the different ways you have healed, things that have diminished in intensity, things that have gone away completely.  Why did that happen?

 

              BECAUSE YOU ARE HEALING.

 

Logically, why would all these other things change and improve, but not the one thing that is still disturbing to you?

 

The answer:       

 

IT WON'T.  IT WILL ALL GO AWAY.  COMPLETELY.

 

Look at the last symptom(s) you have in the same light as the ones that have resolved.  They peter out and eventually just die off.

 

Hang on honey.  It will all leave.

 

Love, Sofa

 

 

[[il...]]

Never,

 

Sweetheart, I can relate so readily to your fears of having something wrong with me now that will never eventually go away.  Boy, do I struggle with this!

 

It is an intrusive thought.  Nothing more.  Look at all the different ways you have healed, things that have diminished in intensity, things that have gone away completely.  Why did that happen?

 

              BECAUSE YOU ARE HEALING.

 

Logically, why would all these other things change and improve, but not the one thing that is still disturbing to you?

 

The answer:       

 

IT WON'T.  IT WILL ALL GO AWAY.  COMPLETELY.

 

Look at the last symptom(s) you have in the same light as the ones that have resolved.  They peter out and eventually just die off.

 

Hang on honey.  It will all leave.

 

Love, Sofa

 

Thank you, Sofa. I appreciate your supportive words. Hey, at least I can leave the house and be semi-functional. I have to keep perspective. Plus, today a few of my sxs are back, like the hyperacusis, but barely even annoying. So, progress is being made and for that I'm extremely grateful.

 

Blessings to you, my friend

[[bl...]]

Hello Sofa!

 

Thank you so much for posting this awesome information! It is spot on!! BIG

 

I consider myself with 1/2 of a foot in phase two and 1 & 1/2 foot in phase three.

 

I'm very thankful for this awesome community and I have much love and respect for each and every one of you very brave people!! We really are very strong individuals!!!!!

 

We will ALL get thru this, together! BIG

 

Hello BB'S!

It's been a little over a month that I posted the above (quoted) reply, I would now say, that I am 1 & 1/2 foot in phase three and 1/2 a foot in phase four!  Wow, what a journey!!

 

I took a chance and ate pizza for dinner last night and feeling the effects today! Yuck! I will not eat it again for a long time has revved sxs!! It's not worth it to me.

My sxs today:

Weird breathing

Anxiety

Some muscle twitching

Muscle tension/soreness in back

Low energy

 

I wish us all comfort and complete healing very soon!

Much love!! BIG

[[so...]]

Blessed,

 

So happy to see you moving through the phases so quickly.  Pizza revved me too.  For me, it was the pizza sauce which has preservatives in it.  I do this now to get my "pizza fix:"  Two pieces of Dave's organic white bread.  Sliced Jack and fontina cheeses on top.  Sliced tomatoes on top of cheese.  Put oven on broil and bake until the cheese melts with a light crisp brown top.  Delish!

 

Sofa

[[bl...]]

Blessed,

 

So happy to see you moving through the phases so quickly.  Pizza revved me too.  For me, it was the pizza sauce which has preservatives in it.  I do this now to get my "pizza fix:"  Two pieces of Dave's organic white bread.  Sliced Jack and fontina cheeses on top.  Sliced tomatoes on top of cheese.  Put oven on broil and bake until the cheese melts with a light crisp brown top.  Delish!

 

Sofa

 

Thank you Sofa!!

[[Be...]]

I will be at 5 weeks on Thursday and i think i am entering phase 2 since my symptoms are not as constant. I do seem to feel a lot more uneasy around people , but i am also chalking that up to hiding out in my basement for the first few weeks after jumping. I started working again a little last week taking a couple photography jobs and i am also able to drive again but not for to long without getting pretty bad anxiety and fear. At this point i am starting to get scared my symptoms could get worse again after two months or i may start having new symptoms. I am also living in a constant fear that the hellish feelings i was having during my first 3 weeks off are going to come back again.

 

I have been reading a lot of peoples stories on here about getting depressed and other symptoms after two months, i do not want to get.  I am wondering since i wasnt on it for as long as others if i will be in withdrawal after two months? Is it possible i will heal after two?

 

Thanks everyone

Keep fighting

[[so...]]

Bill,

 

Regarding healing timelines, everyone is different and anything is possible.  Try not to get hung up on the duration and just take one day at a time.  Two months would be record time healing, so don't get disappointed if that time comes and goes and you still have symptoms.  I only took benzos for two months.  I was on opiates and Gabapentin, however, over 2.5 years, so my situation, and the fact that I'm still symptomatic at 19 months off, is different than yours.

 

I doubt whether you will feel worse in phase two than in acute, but it is still pretty rough.  You may start getting more windows than waves to help you through it.

 

Sofa

[[Ki...]]

I'm worried how long I can tolerate this withdrawal. I suffer from brain zaps, severe at times. Numbness in my feet and hands. Constant tingling through my body. All 5 of my senses are affected, especially taste and smell. I once drank bad milk, because I couldn't smell that it was bad. It didn't look sour, but I actually visited in my sleep. I've lost an enormous amount of weight, because I can no longer taste. I think sleep could help, but that alludes me. Not sure how long I can keep going. :'(

[[so...]]

Hi Kitty,

 

You might want to add a signature so that other buddies can give you more direct support and reassurance based on their own experiences.

 

This all gets better over time, and eventually you will normalize and be fine.  This is a temporary disruption of the nervous system and you will recover 100%.

 

Sofa

[[di...]]

Phase one.  FML.  I did a gradual taper, so hopefully I won't be suffering for too much longer.

[[so...]]

Kitty,

 

I'm glad you did a signature.  We have something in common with the opiates and Lorazepam.  Are you in pain?  I found that the opiates eventually started CAUSING my back pain.  When I got off the opiates at first I had a lot of pain.  Three months later, no more pain.

 

Although I was on Ativan for only 2 months low dose sporadic use, it was enough to throw me into this challenging journey of discontinuation.  It doesn't seem to matter how long you took the drug, in terms of withdrawal duration.  I'm still in it at 19 months since my CT jump off all meds.

 

We will all recover eventually.  Everybody recovers, which is a blessing.

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

Dirty,

 

You may want to add a signature to get more helpful support.  I hope you are right about coming out of this sooner than later.  I haven't found that to be true in my case, but we are all different.

 

Sofa

[[MN...]]

I just entered phase 1 after a way-too-smooth first three weeks off Klono. I tapered for over a year and really thought that after I jumped things would be so easy. The first three weeks seemed to support my theory. But week three hit like a hail storm and I'm filled with extreme anxiety, depression, and intrusive thoughts. No realyl physical symptoms yet, just some ear ringing and the occasional headache/neck ache/stomach upset.

 

 

I hope by months 2-3 I will be starting to enter phase 2. I had no idea that even a slow, liquid taper could be so miserable in the end. Klonopin is hell.

[[so...]]

MNC,

 

Many buddies get that delayed onset of acute.  Benzos store in our fat cells and leech out slowly over time, which is why the delay in acute symptoms.  After awhile, things should settle down. 

 

Sofa

[[Bu...]]

I LOVE This! Thank you so much for posting Sofa. And I also love reading about the many people in Stage 3. Sometimes it's hard to see the forest for the trees and it can seem like everyone is just suffering horribly, so this is a great post to clarify that there is actually much, much healing happening here!

 

As for me, solidly stage 3 and hopefully edging towards 4, 13 months after a sloooooow 3+ year taper of 10 mgs of Valium. I slowed so much at the end I didn't notice much acute. I remember that about a month after I was off I had a weird one week benzo flu out of the blue. Otherwise, it was the same ole same ole symptoms.

 

Then, just as you said, I noticed the windows and waves pattern. My worst symptom has been fatigue and a sense of weakness in my limbs, but experiencing much fewer waves since April. Keeping thinking I'm close to reliably being able to exercise again.

 

If it wasn't for the weird unending UTIs and muscle spasms, I might call myself Stage 4 soon...The one thing I wonder about is that my nervous system still feels very "raw." I've always been a sensitive sort, but hopefully I won't always be THIS sensitive.

 

[[so...]]

Woot! Woot!  Bubbles!

 

You are getting there!  Good for you!

 

Sofa

[[MN...]]

Sofa, you're amazing. Thank you for the encouragement on this very hard day. I will keep repeating your words.

[[Be...]]

I am wondering what phase i am in now? I have been in a week long window since last Thursday.. Constantly fearing it's going to end.

 

All of my physical symptoms have finally left, hopefully for good. Anxiety has dropped immensely I am not constantly in fear or worry. I am mainly left with some rotten depression. Maybe it was there all along and I didn't notice it because of how bad I was feeling? I do still have a bit of the dr/dp comes and goes in intensity.

 

So where am I at now ?

[[mr...]]

I think my mom is at the end of phase 2.

During the taper, she had a little of all the phases, but once off, the phases are more sequential.

 

[[so...]]

Bill,

 

Did you jump off May 2016?  If so, you are very early in the process.

 

Sofa

[[Be...]]

So I am still in phase one or two?

[[so...]]

Bill,

 

You can determine the phase you are in by how you are feeling.  If you are experiencing windows and waves or symptoms changing, phase 2.  You tapered, which may have accelerated your movement through the phases.  You are only a little more than a month off the drugs.  Hang in there.

 

Sofa

[[Be...]]

Thanks sofa, sorry for pestering you . I have been having ocd about my healing. I try not to focus on it so much but it's been the center of my focus for months. Do you stil focus on yours all the time?

[[so...]]

Bill,

 

You are not pestering me one bit.  One thing we ALL have in common is the fear ruminations.  We fear it's going to get worse.  We fear how much longer we will be in this horrible state.  We fear we aren't healing.  We fear we have permanent damage.  We fear we are somehow causing this.  The list goes on and on.  Believe me, I know.

 

These are normal fears anyone would have going through something like this.  The only thing we can do is separate the fears from the truths.  We ARE healing.  This condition IS temporary.  We ARE moving forward.  We are NOT causing this.  Our brains know what they are doing and they KNOW HOW TO FIX THIS.

 

Nobody can tell you how long the process will take, but a safe bet would be 2 years to be symptom free and 1 more year to be completely healed.  It could take some people less time.  It could take some people more.  Anecdotal evidence concludes that 96% of us are symptom free by 2 years.  99% are symptom free by year 3.  Any timeline that ends before these are a bonus.

 

You'll be fine.  Everyone moves through the phases in different patterns and time frames.  Everyone heals eventually. 

 

Sofa