18-30 MONTHS AND UPWARDS

[[mo...]]

(Hey I just want to easily find this thread, thanks.)

[[br...]]

 

Welcome mon pilote .

 

It's a friendly place to hang out .

[[...]]

 

Julz and my fellow time warp buddies,  this I know to be true :' Every day in every way we are getting better and better' . This little gem of a mantra became popular back in the late twenties . I like it because for us it is the literal truth . At the very happy state of being 80/90% healed I am in the state of almost childhood wonder of being reborn . To put it simply I feel at least ten years younger, and the past three years of tolerance and withdrawal are becoming a distant and mildly unpleasant memory.

 

So as I and others wiser than I have said before ' We all heal ' . Eventually the wonderful outcome of all of our hard work arrives . Until it does we hang in and we fight for what is rightfully ours , and that is a happy , healthy and productive life.

 

 

This is music to my ears, Brave  Thank you so much for sharing!

 

YES! 'Every day, we are getting better and better', believing in the contrary is believing in the lies of withdrawal, whether we are going through 'long status quo' like me, or the ups and downs of waves and windows like most. But how else could it be? Our brains recognize chaos, devise a plan and start taking action. We have been in the 'action' phase for a while now, so much healing has already taken place, even if it doesn't quite feel that way... how else could it be?

 

Warm healing hugs to All! 

Julz xx

[[Kl...]]

I thought the wave I had before was bad a couple weeks back, been back in another one now, day 5. So intense and extremely hard. 29 months in a couple days. Something has to give soon.

[[lo...]]

how is your baseline? mine is pretty low as of now + the waves. weekends are usually much better, when I don't have to work. towards Friday I am diving badly.

I think my ability to deal with stress is extremely low now.

 

I thought the wave I had before was bad a couple weeks back, been back in another one now, day 5. So intense and extremely hard. 29 months in a couple days. Something has to give soon.

[[Ho...]]

Next week I am 23,5 months out. I am cycling through waves which last 4-6 weeks now and are nasty. Definitely not functional, but have some windows of lessened symptoms. I have the feeling that after each wave the symptoms dissapear for good, because they are very strong. But when this cycle ends... no one knows.

 

I have a strong believe that progression will come in couple of months.

[[Kl...]]

how is your baseline? mine is pretty low as of now + the waves. weekends are usually much better, when I don't have to work. towards Friday I am diving badly.

I think my ability to deal with stress is extremely low now.

 

I thought the wave I had before was bad a couple weeks back, been back in another one now, day 5. So intense and extremely hard. 29 months in a couple days. Something has to give soon.

 

I felt my baseline was good before this wave, like maybe 80-85%.. now it feels lower. I can't relax again, just feel like it's 24/7 something isn't great. I am super sensitive to everything again now even more so. My waves before this have lasted 7-9 days for the most part... so I hope this one is going to pass soon. I might take the rest of the week off and hopefully Ill be ok come Tuesday. Month 29 has been a bitch honestly.. it seems like the past 6 months every other month has been bad, so maybe month 30 will be a better one again.. I actually had a worse time on the weekend, when this wave started. As hard as it is working like this it's a distraction, but today I just didnt feel functional .

[[lo...]]

I can relate a bit. some days I can't relax 9am-6pm but outside I'm ok. yesterday no relaxation 24/7 even before sleep. woke up at 4.30am with the same feeling, but was able to get back to sleep. the days were it goes 24/7 are the worst. whats interesting that the worst wave days, usually end up with a calm and nice evening. but it is those mediocre days which don't let up....

 

 

how is your baseline? mine is pretty low as of now + the waves. weekends are usually much better, when I don't have to work. towards Friday I am diving badly.

I think my ability to deal with stress is extremely low now.

 

I thought the wave I had before was bad a couple weeks back, been back in another one now, day 5. So intense and extremely hard. 29 months in a couple days. Something has to give soon.

 

I felt my baseline was good before this wave, like maybe 80-85%.. now it feels lower. I can't relax again, just feel like it's 24/7 something isn't great. I am super sensitive to everything again now even more so. My waves before this have lasted 7-9 days for the most part... so I hope this one is going to pass soon. I might take the rest of the week off and hopefully Ill be ok come Tuesday. Month 29 has been a bitch honestly.. it seems like the past 6 months every other month has been bad, so maybe month 30 will be a better one again.. I actually had a worse time on the weekend, when this wave started. As hard as it is working like this it's a distraction, but today I just didnt feel functional .

[[...]]

I thought the wave I had before was bad a couple weeks back, been back in another one now, day 5. So intense and extremely hard. 29 months in a couple days. Something has to give soon.

 

Hold on bud... you’re almost there.

[[2t...]]

Just a place holder for now but will post soon.

skimming through I see a lot of familiar names/faces. 

2trusting

[[Kl...]]

I thought the wave I had before was bad a couple weeks back, been back in another one now, day 5. So intense and extremely hard. 29 months in a couple days. Something has to give soon.

 

Hold on bud... you’re almost there.

 

Thanks man, hoping...

[[Kl...]]

I can relate a bit. some days I can't relax 9am-6pm but outside I'm ok. yesterday no relaxation 24/7 even before sleep. woke up at 4.30am with the same feeling, but was able to get back to sleep. the days were it goes 24/7 are the worst. whats interesting that the worst wave days, usually end up with a calm and nice evening. but it is those mediocre days which don't let up....

 

 

Yep it's so weird, all the over place. I have had a couple good evening also a couple really bad ones, which rarely happens maybe once or twice every 2-3 months.

 

I haven't been able to get back to sleep at all lately after the 4am wake.. For a while I could, it's frustrating because who wants to get up at 4am, and if I don't it feels worse to lay there.

[[br...]]

 

Hang in there Klungo . Everything that I read tells me that these strong waves are common towards the end of the recovery period.It's almost as if the C.N.S is doing a final tweaking .Our problem of course is that we have been in the battlefield too long , and exhaustion has set in . We are sick and tired of it all and who can blame us . It's also hard  to crash after long periods of feeling so well . The good thing is that we are pros. when it comes to coping, staying strong and waiting . These skills will get us through safely to the end .

[[da...]]

Following -

 

I start month 31 in a few days. My experience is pretty much the same as the rest of you. My current wave/window pattern is about 10 days wave and 10 days window. Honestly I am about worn out but what can you do?

 

 

Hang in there Klungo . Everything that I read tells me that these strong waves are common towards the end of the recovery period.It's almost as if the C.N.S is doing a final tweaking .Our problem of course is that we have been in the battlefield too long , and exhaustion has set in . We are sick and tired of it all and who can blame us . It's also hard  to crash after long periods of feeling so well . The good thing is that we are pros. when it comes to coping, staying strong and waiting . These skills will get us through safely to the end .

Thanks Brave Rabbit! That was good for me to read as well! 

 

Dash

[[da...]]

Does anybody else still have the really bad cognitive stuff - memory problems, spaced out, feel like you don't know anything - but can still answer questions (I've never figured that one out) D/P, D/R - like you're disconnected from yourself (your brain and body) and everything else around you. Basically out of it. Can't function. 

In a window that goes away. My windows are so good now, I can't believe it when I get another wave.

Just wondering.....

 

[[Kl...]]

Following -

 

I start month 31 in a few days. My experience is pretty much the same as the rest of you. My current wave/window pattern is about 10 days wave and 10 days window. Honestly I am about worn out but what can you do?

 

 

Hang in there Klungo . Everything that I read tells me that these strong waves are common towards the end of the recovery period.It's almost as if the C.N.S is doing a final tweaking .Our problem of course is that we have been in the battlefield too long , and exhaustion has set in . We are sick and tired of it all and who can blame us . It's also hard  to crash after long periods of feeling so well . The good thing is that we are pros. when it comes to coping, staying strong and waiting . These skills will get us through safely to the end .

Thanks Brave Rabbit! That was good for me to read as well! 

 

Dash

 

Yeah I have been having 8-10 day waves since 2 years.. not fun at all.. 

 

What date did you jump?

 

 

Also anyone able to nap. If I nap early evening I can get away with it mostly but if I try during the day I wake up after 10 min and feel like crap.. still.. hard to believe this torture last so long. 7 months to 36.. let's hope it's all over by then or before!

[[Kl...]]

In a bad wave it's hard to think or talk or function, doesn't happen that often now. I rarely get DR even in bad waves now either, thankful for that.

[[da...]]

My jump date is 8-17-16.

If I didn't still have the cog fog in a wave - I think I could probably function while in a wave. I'm hoping I get there soon. I was reading some old posts from Parker here on BB and that seems to be the case a lot of the time. Basically things get better to the point that you can just function even though you don't feel great or quite right even in a "wave" and it just gets better from there. Everybody's different though. I think people can just get better one day and that's it. Here's hoping for that!

[[Kl...]]

Ok like 5 week ahead of me. Getting into the recovery area.

 

I have waves I can function in but still get some that are terrible, was having a lot less of them but they came back lately.

 

Yeah it seems like from others 33-36 comes up a lot for feeling decent. Let's hope it happens soon.

[[da...]]

The sooner the better for sure!!

[[...]]

In a bad wave it's hard to think or talk or function, doesn't happen that often now. I rarely get DR even in bad waves now either, thankful for that.

 

Yea man, my brain is like glue when I’m bad (today). My whit is gone. But yea, “can’t barely think, talk, or function” describes it very well.

[[lo...]]

glue is the perfect work to describe it for me too. glue/jelly. there is also the emotional aspect, will this ever end type of thinking. as irrational as it is, it is there.

just waiting for the night, and see what the next day brings. thankfully sleep is somewhat ok, although disrupted unless I take some hydroxyzine etc.

mid winter is also rough, no change just cold here

 

In a bad wave it's hard to think or talk or function, doesn't happen that often now. I rarely get DR even in bad waves now either, thankful for that.

 

Yea man, my brain is like glue when I’m bad (today). My whit is gone. But yea, “can’t barely think, talk, or function” describes it very well.

[[Kl...]]

Yeah I sleep fine til 4am.. I wake occasionally but can sleep if I do except at 4. I stopped taking the antihistamines, maybe that's why I dont sleep as well, but I didnt like the side effects from it. I would sometimes take a bit more at 4am, sometimes it helped. Always something right?

 

It's cold here too, snowy / rainy.. another month and some warmer days will be coming hopefully.

 

Any of you get the horrible restless feeling, like in your body mostly but also your mind? I had a bit uptick of that in this last wave I'm in, along with burning feelings in my nerves.. stuff that I haven't had much of for a while. I was having calmer days..

 

Yep I'm back to getting through the days til the evening since I usually get relief then.. was hoping I was past that, but the waves don't seem to want to comply.

[[lo...]]

I am wondering if anybody turned corner from really bad waves to healing quickly, or is this a rather slow process again. it is hard to believe this shit again after having a 1-2month window.

[[Kl...]]

I am wondering if anybody turned corner from really bad waves to healing quickly, or is this a rather slow process again. it is hard to believe this shit again after having a 1-2month window.

 

I wonder too. I've had improvement over 24-29 but it's been a bit of a plateau really. I was improving constantly from 14-24..