The December 2015-February 2016 Jump Club

[[Ho...]]

I don’t believe in all those psychiatry terms anymore. It’s all gobbledegook. I get health anxiety as part of my benzo wd waves. It’ll go away. I’m not the least bit concerned. I’ve learned a lot of techniques to deal with it but thanks Hockey!

 

Your welcome. Hang tough!

[[Sh...]]

Wow. What on earth? Ive never attacked anyone like you just have mate.

 

A while back every time I posted about the ocd waves like Ang has, you would pop up and get frustrated and annoyed at me for not trying your methods. To the point where I had to inbox you to stop doing it.

 

I was simply trying to point out that like Ang, I am also certain that this is benzo wd causing this.

 

My post history? Really? Ive done nothing but offer support to good ppl on here and start threads that then get trolled and brought down by other people.

[[Sh...]]

In fact anges respose to you sounds exactly like the first 5 responses I gave to you when you kept suggesting it to me over and over again. Maybe that was part of your ocd without you realising. It got annoying after that.

 

And no one asked for my input? Did ang ask for your input? I thought this board is about sharing opinions.

[[bj...]]

Hey all.

 

Please cool down.

 

I am still suffering. Depression, despair and a feeling of loneliness. I hope it will end.

 

Nowadays I force myself to go to the gym every day. It helps.

My concerts are getting nearer, and I wonder how to cope with them. But I shall sing and play anyway! We don't give up!!!

[[pe...]]

Hi bjeste...

 

I thought of you the other day and wondered how you are doing when I came across an article about a big Munch exhibit in Oslo.  Everybody knows "The Scream" of course.  I too continue to suffer as I approach 2 years out.  Loneliness--or rather the feeling of it--remains a big problem.  Part of that comes I think from carrying around these awful feelings that words cannot adequately describe...  But, like you again, I continue to do what I need to do to get through my days.  You will sing and play anyway...  Maybe you will go to the Munch exhibit.

 

I am sorry to see Hockey and Shamo at loggerheads.  It's really hard to communicate clearly in this format...

 

Best to all...

 

 

 

 

[[bj...]]

Hey Pensi!

 

Thanks for thinking of me!

My wife is a teacher in arts in secondary high school, and she and her students went to see the Munch exhibition last week.

I hope I will be interested in art and music again. The sooner the better.

Good description from you:

Loneliness--or rather the feeling of it--remains a big problem.  Part of that comes I think from carrying around these awful feelings that words cannot adequately describe...

 

Better times will come!

 

 

 

[[sw...]]

Hi folks,

 

Here's an update: I am definitely in a different place than a year ago. What's notable is how I can tolerate the ongoing baseline of low physical anxiety. I'd prefer it just went away, however.

 

I need to be out of pain in order to be more functional. I am working on that from every angle. And when I use up current angles, I try a new one. At times the perseverance comes to a crashing halt.

 

Sleep is precious. Six hours is the usual. Are you guys sleeping well? Sometimes I wake early feeling electrified. Yet, I think the inner vibrations are lessening. Does anyone else still get these?

 

I'm living my life as best as I can. Many of my activities and relationships are through the computer. I'm doing collaborative genealogy research, which is really satisfying. I am glad my brain is sharp. The other day, before I chickened out I submitted my bio to be a cookbook reviewer for the local paper. Yesterday I got a positive reply, and today I picked up the free book, which the topic is right up my alley. Now I have reading and cooking to do, and a deadline! As for gardening, I'm asking for lots of help with labor, and in turn sharing my horticultural knowledge and experience.

 

So good to stay connected —ang, pensioner, bjeste, hockey... May we all live in health!

 

Bennie

Hi Bennie. I read some of your replies on the MT forum. It seemed like you might have some experience that I could benefit from. From my sig, you can see that I am close to jumping. That is assuming I stay with the taper rate of .0025 mg per day, which is now 2.86% per day. I have been doing a liquid titration since .5 mg K.

 

My symptoms are varied: Chronic Fatigue, Benzo Brain, benzo belly, headaches, depression and anxiety and some muscle stuff. Most of this is stable except for the headaches, anxiety and benzo brain  all of which seem seem to be worsening. I want to get off of this stuff and someday even get off my anti depressants too but feel discouraged a lot lately

 

Any suggestions for the tail end of a taper?

 

Thanks for you kindness,

 

tommy

[[pe...]]

Hey all:

 

Well I have taken no benzo for two years now today.  I still struggle.  I had absolutely no notion, when I made the decision to quit, that I would feel as I have felt for the last two years.  A misery unlike any I had previously experienced (and I had experienced previously some misery).  I want to say the anxiety is a little less, but I can't tell really.  I live in that part of California now affected by fires.  My sky has been blanketed with thick smoke--the sun a red disk--for a week now.  This along with the threat of being burned out has upped my anxiety geiger counter.  I am also exhausted from disturbed and inadequate sleep.  So it's really hard to say why I am feeling what I am feeling--whether withdrawal or situational stress. But whatever the cause, the withdrawal makes it worse. Sorry, I am incoherent today.

 

I just wanted to say hello as a way of marking this sad anniversary.

 

Hi bjeste, ang, hockey...

 

Traffic has been slow on this thread lately.  I hope you are all hanging in there.

 

(Swammi, maybe you should try to contact Bennie directly)

[[an...]]

Oh no Pens! I hope your house and family stays safe!!!

 

I’m almost to 2 years and I’ll report back. Still just doing my best to survive.

 

 

[[Ho...]]

2 years today guys. Just to think over two years ago I didn't know how I was going to make it each day. I've come a long way. Still riding the roller coaster but I'm still breathing. It's been the longest and hardest two and half years of my life. Hope your all hanging in.

[[pe...]]

Hey, looks like we are all getting to that 2 year mark.

 

Way to go, Hockey, you hung in there, and things have just got to lighten up.

 

Thanks, Ang, my wife and I are safe, at the moment, from fire.  We will know in a couple of days how things are going.  Predictions of high winds for this evening.  Mainly, we struggle with the smoke.  Half the people, round here, when outside are wearing masks...  And do post a two year update...

 

You, too, bjeste.

 

Best to all.

[[Er...]]

Congrats on 2 years to you Pens and Hockeylife! I feel mostly healed (90%-95%) most days but have been in a bit of a wave the last week with random pains all dull and sharp pains all over and of course the Heath anxiety that goes along with it. Hopping it will pass soon!

[[pe...]]

Hey Eric...

So good to hear you have mended so much.  From what I can gather, even as far out as you are and as well as you are, set-backs do occur.  Stress, stuff like that can set things off.  Best to you and good to hear from you...

 

How are you other BB's doing as you hit two years out..

 

As for me, who knows how I am--we have been under fire alert (here in CA) now for two weeks and it's really wearing me out (withdrawal continues, of course)....

 

I am very tired, and very anxious, and pretty spaced out.  Oh, I just turned 72....

[[bj...]]

Hey all.

 

Hey Pensi.

Hope the fires will end soon.

You are struggling with the withdrawal. Me too. Very.

Still breathing, and shall do so further. This is more than hell.

 

New day:

My first day in weeks feeling much better. Yesss!!!

 

And Happy birthday!

 

[[an...]]

Happy birthday Pens... this year will be better than the last 2. That’s for sure.

 

Do any of you have chest tightness or breathing issues? I’ve been getting new weird symptoms and just checking in to see if any of you have these.

[[Er...]]

 

 

Do any of you have chest tightness or breathing issues? I’ve been getting new weird symptoms and just checking in to see if any of you have these.

 

Hi Ang.  I haven't had it in a while but chest tightness and trouble getting a deep breath is a symptom that I had from time to time.  Good luck!

 

Over a year ago I thought both of us were on our way to being done with this but it appears you're still struggling.  Sorry to hear that.

[[pe...]]

Hey bjeste and ang,

 

Thanks for the birthday best wishes.  Yes, this next year has just got to be better than these last two.

 

The darn fire continues. High winds are expected tomorrow (Wednesday) night and that, as they say, will tell the tale. But today the air is pretty clear of smoke....

 

Oh, ang, yes I have tightness in the chest quite a bit. But no problem breathing really.  It's how anxiety presents to me: a tension, like a knot, in the chest.

 

Best to all and hang in there....

[[Ho...]]

Merry Christmas everybody!

[[an...]]

Merry Christmas!

[[pe...]]

Thanks Hockey and Ang

 

A belated Merry Christmas to all and a happy New Year coming up...

[[an...]]

Happy Holidays to all of you! I was alone this Christmas with a bad cold or virus or something. It’s still hanging on.

[[pe...]]

Ang!  Sorry to hear.  Alone at Christmas with a cold.  Rats!  But the new year will bring new things...

 

Hey, bjeste, is Christmas a really big deal in Norway?

 

Oh, I tried CBD oil for about a month.  At first it seemed to help with anxiety, but over time I felt it was exhausting me.  So now I am backing off.  So far I don't regret the experiment..

 

Best to all!

[[an...]]

Good to know your experience Pens! Worth a shot!

[[bj...]]

Hey all!

 

I wish you a really happy new year!

Let 2018 be the year when things go back to normal again!

and Pensi,  Christmas in Norway is like Christmas in your country. A  fine tradition.

I wish I could have participated like I did before this fatal happened. Next year must  be normal.

 

Ang: Never more alone ans sick at Christmas! Hope you are well again now.

 

Pensi: All well after the fires?

 

[[pe...]]

Hey bjeste...

 

Good to hear from you, and thanks for the New Year good wishes...  And, yes, the fire is over and the air is clear, though I am still feeling psychological fallout from the event.

 

Ang, good to see, on another thread, that you had a good Christmas event with family...

 

I want to wish all who have visited this thread over the last two arduous years, I very happy New Year.  I have ever hope that by this time next year we will all be breathing much easier!