Post Benzo Freedom Withdrawal Support Group

[[An...]]

I´ve just read your post Pianogirl and please don´t worry about other people´s experiences of ramped up symptoms prior or during travel.  I am sure you will be fine - I have been on past trips during w/d and enjoyed them a lot - this one tomorrow is particularly stressful for me and I am hoping that things will run smoothly and that it is just the anticipation.  I don´t know why my metabolism is as it is.

 

We are all different and I wish you a lovely time with your family.

 

Love

Angel

[[ve...]]

Hi all, Thanks Vertigo, for always coming back to remind us that healing will happen, despite the ups and downs.

My worse lingering sxs continue to be muscle spasms and dizziness. I have some am adrenalin but it is not too bad.  I did some research on the relationship between muscle spasms and dizziness and put it on my blog.  I know for sure this is happening to me so I am glad I am going to get regular massages.  I had the first one on Friday and on Saturday I had less shoulder pain than I've had for a while. I know that time will heal this but I think the massages will help ease the discomfort and perhaps allow me to get back to an exercise routine in the near future. I feel yukky without exercise, I spent so very many years working on my fitness level. I so wanted to be on the ski slope this year but oh well.  Anyway, so far its a really bad snow year for our mountains.I get a little hesitant when I read about peoples travels ramping up the sxs. We are leaving in 2 weeks to visit our son, daughter in law and brand new grandbaby.  I am so excited and trying not to be worried. I want to enjoy her and my time there since this is our first and maybe only grandbaby.I am teaching a a lot and think it will be ok as I heal more.  There are some pretty tired eyes looking at me in the mirror after I finish teaching.

Take care everyone and keep walking forward towards healing.

Hugs,

pianogirl 

 

Hi Pianogirl.  I've had muscle tension in my neck off and back off and on the last couple years.  I had one really good experience with massage and one not so good in the last year.  The good one was when I went for a Thai massage at about a year off and it was fabulous.  The masseuse knew just the right spots and did not overdo it.  When I went back about four months later, that masseuse was no longer there and the next one went too far, massage was too strong and I ended up with a month of off and on back pain. So it is important to tell the masseuse not too hard and give her/him feedback if it gets too much.  Sometimes one might (or at least I) might feel hesitant to correct them or interrupt the flow but I think you have to stop them if it is too strong.  It also  helps to tell them in advance not too strong or rough in this or that area and if it is too rough, immediately let them know, I wish I had that second time.  I did go back a third time about six months ago and asked for a different masseuse but it was also not as good as the first one.  Ultimately I think massage can be helpful but in moderation. Glad it's working for you so far PG.  I agree with Angel, go for that trip with your new grandbaby.  Going in knowing that a symptom might spike is helpful in that you will know to take rest when you need it.  Don't try to be super grandma or win any awards for most helpful mother in law and you'll do great.  Remember to breathe and stay balanced, eat healthy and bring healthy snacks for the trip.  Hydrate before flying and during flights and have a great time on your visit.  I'm sure you will be glad you made the trip .

 

Best,

 

Vertigo

[[pi...]]

Hi Vertigo,

 

Thanks so much for the response and the travel tips.  I saw the spine doctor recently and he sent me to the pain management doctor since I have had both cervical fusion and shoulder surgery.  The pain doc thinks I have myofascial pain and wanted to give me injections.  I am determined to avoid them at all costs and looked into myofascial release therapy. I researched massage therapists and found several that do that type of massage. I spoke to the one I went to at length and she has my health history including benzos.  She doesn't really know anything about them though.  I did request light massage and she was really careful. I just hope that it can help to release some of the tension that I carry in the neck, shoulder area.  I had a good day on Saturday but Sunday descended to a new low, so many physical sxs and some new ones. My stomach has been fine for months but since yesterday afernoon is not so good.

 

I won't overdo myself for sure on the trip. Our son and daughter in law have a cleaning service as well as a nanny, so I don't need to be super grandma by any means. I may do some cooking but thats a hobby of mine and I really relax in the kitchen. We are used to pretty long flights so this one won't be too bad, less than 4 hours. I always bring my own food as well.

 

Hugs,

 

pianogirl 

 

 

[[pa...]]

Hi V, Rocko & others!

I saw Believe's post and read the link about Melatonin supplementation during benzo use and w/d. Thank you for posting this. I did not read all the technical details but this article seems to hit home with me and how my w/d was improved. You see, I did use melatonin on a regular basis during my taper and the one symptom that did not plague me (at least not much) was insomnia. I remember also reading a nutritional supplement guide for prescription that my in-laws had at their house. This book talked about melatonin supplement at night being helpful during benzo use for exactly the same reasons that are outlined in the article.

Just as this article says, after I first started the prescription for ativan (and then clonazepam as directed by my doctor), I started to have more and more problems going to sleep. I remember hearing about melatonin supplementation, so I started using it. It is hard to say if at first it worked, since I also started on the A/D (remeron) that I currently use. Being an A/D, it did (and does) increase the amount of serotonin. To this day, I feel that remeron has been a big help for me but not for the same reasons my doctors might. I've always felt that anything that helped restore my serotonin balance (this being brought on by the benzo use which my doctor initially prescribed) was going to benefit me.

I continue to use melatonin to this day due to work/sleep shift changes. I feel that once I can get a regular shift, I probably won't be needing melatonin supplements at least not regularly.

I, of course, can't speak for all members here on the forum whether or not melatonin is a good thing to use during a taper. I did work for me, however, and was a real godsend when I needed to have a good night sleep in order to continue working full time at a high stress job. Right now, I usually get by on 1.5mg (half a pill). The only problem I sometimes have is grogginess in the mornings. I can't tell whether this is because of melatonin, or simply the effects of too many sleep changes.

Whether or not a member chooses to use melatonin for sleep during a taper is fine. I understand that some have reservations about introducing another supplement to their system. Perhaps there may be some who have negative reactions such as intense dreams etc? Overall, if one sleeps best without taking anything, that's what's best!

Best wishes to all and have a great week!

 

[[ve...]]

Good Morning Vertigo, So nice to see you are still around, giving us encouragement and hope.  As you and the other BB can see, I don't post much but I still come to the forum and read the post, especially when I am not feeling well. I still find it hard to get the words out and down on paper so I just lurk and find comfort in reading others post. I am hoping there will come a day when I will be able to over come this and give back to the forum what others have given me...

Still struggling but getting by.....(seems to be improving slowly day by day)

Hope you and all the BB have a wonderful, stress free day!

Ibmom

 

Hi Ibmom.  Sorry to read that you're still not feeling well.  Yes, it can be a struggle that lasts longer than one had hoped for, but it will dissipate with time.  I'm confident that by summer (if not sooner), you will surprise yourself by how much better you will be feeling. Are you and your sister planning anything fun this year?

 

Best wishes,

 

Vertigo

[[ve...]]

Hi V, Rocko & others!   Just as this article says, after I first started the prescription for ativan (and then clonazepam as directed by my doctor), I started to have more and more problems going to sleep. I remember hearing about melatonin supplementation, so I started using it. It is hard to say if at first it worked, since I also started on the A/D (remeron) that I currently use. Being an A/D, it did (and does) increase the amount of serotonin. To this day, I feel that remeron has been a big help for me but not for the same reasons my doctors might. I've always felt that anything that helped restore my serotonin balance (this being brought on by the benzo use which my doctor initially prescribed) was going to benefit me.

I continue to use melatonin to this day due to work/sleep shift changes. I feel that once I can get a regular shift, I probably won't be needing melatonin supplements at least not regularly. I, of course, can't speak for all members here on the forum whether or not melatonin is a good thing to use during a taper. I did work for me, however, and was a real godsend when I needed to have a good night sleep in order to continue working full time at a high stress job. Right now, I usually get by on 1.5mg (half a pill). The only problem I sometimes have is grogginess in the mornings. I can't tell whether this is because of melatonin, or simply the effects of too many sleep changes.Whether or not a member chooses to use melatonin for sleep during a taper is fine. I understand that some have reservations about introducing another supplement to their system. Perhaps there may be some who have negative reactions such as intense dreams etc? Overall, if one sleeps best without taking anything, that's what's best!Best wishes to all and have a great week!

 

Hi Pangelingua.  I agree that after taper, serotonin and other neurotransmitters may be out of balance.  Some folks elect to ride it out while others were already on some a/d to begin with, allbeit a small dose as you have been with the remeron.  Others may contemplate after a few months whether an a/d might be helpful in the initial recovery phase off the benzo.  I think it is an individual decision.  There were times in the first year that I felt out of balance but I have been glad thus far to not add other medications, other than the prilosec which I take for GERD and the occasional antihistamine for allergies.

 

Best,

 

Vertigo

[[...]]

Pange - do you ever find that the melatonin gives you  nightmares?  just curious. 

 

geez i had such a darn slam today - one of the worst episodes ever.  so thankful folks are on here telling me that is somewhat normal for this process because today was one scary day.  so electrified and weird feeling. 

if anyone has a chance to tell me again it will go away i'd be so thankful.  my faith is stronger from this tho- and i made it back to the classroom.  at 3 am i thought it might be a medical leave for me but i think i can keep going one day at a time.

thanks so much for being there.

[[Dp...]]

19 months off and feeling like i have lost all progress.. What the heck happened i wonder i was feeling pretty well for months...

[[an...]]

I am 4 days away from 22 mos off. I like many people I have been having physical severe anxiety. My body is filled with so much pressure I feel like I can't breath. When I stand or try to walk I feel like I weigh a ton and then the burning shaking nerves take over. This of course leads to the dizzy lightheaded feeling. I really can't remember me being this bad even a year ago. My head is still screaming and vision is blurred again. I have no patience for anything or anyone. Even the phone sets  me off. How can this be possible this far off. My head dr. if you know what I mean wants to see me again tom.  But I don't know what he can do. I am to a point where I have given up on healing. Is there normal feelings after benzos when you can really enjoy life without this torture

[[ve...]]

I am 4 days away from 22 mos off. I like many people I have been having physical severe anxiety. My body is filled with so much pressure I feel like I can't breath. When I stand or try to walk I feel like I weigh a ton and then the burning shaking nerves take over. This of course leads to the dizzy lightheaded feeling. I really can't remember me being this bad even a year ago. My head is still screaming and vision is blurred again. I have no patience for anything or anyone. Even the phone sets  me off. How can this be possible this far off. My head dr. if you know what I mean wants to see me again tom.  But I don't know what he can do. I am to a point where I have given up on healing. Is there normal feelings after benzos when you can really enjoy life without this torture

 

Hi Angel111.  One of the reasons I first took a benzo was for anxiety and I still have some degree of anxiety although not panic attacks.  I did have vertigo/dizziness, partly as a result of a c/t off valium and later due to very high stress at a year out.  I also had a couple "mini panic" situations at three and six months off, mostly rebound anxiety.  I personally believe that after about 18 months, much of the remaining panic or anxiety starts to be less about "withdrawal and recovery" and more about the pre condition of anxiety that one may have had before the benzo, at least that was the case for me. Or it could be more of a "protracted" situation I suppose plus could be impacted by other medications taken.

 

    I personally have found "The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Anxiety" by Forseith to be very helpful.  It is based on the "ACT" therapy model.  Physical anxiety can be worsened by our own perceptions, attitudes and mindset in addition to what may be going on physiologically in terms of reactions to being off a benzodiazapene as well as possibly other health conditions, stress going on and/or other medications added... in other words, it may not be all about the benzo at this point.  To answer your question, all feelings are "normal".

 

  Anxiety is in fact normal.  We just need to learn to find better ways to cope with it.  Please do not give up on healing.  It sounds like have come a long way Angel. It might just take some tweaking of those other medications as well as working through some therapy and/or bibliotherapy (reading books to learn new ways to respond to stress and anxiety). Did you have much anxiety before you took the first benzo?

 

Hope you get some answers as I know it can be frustrating at 22 months out.

 

Vertigo

[[an...]]

Yes I was given benzos for what I thought was bad anxiety then. Not knowing that what I have now is real physical anxiety that is worse then what I had then. Do some people never heal and must live on benzos? I am glad I threw them away because I would sure pop one now. Thanks for talking to me.

[[ve...]]

Yes I was given benzos for what I thought was bad anxiety then. Not knowing that what I have now is real physical anxiety that is worse then what I had then. Do some people never heal and must live on benzos? I am glad I threw them away because I would sure pop one now. Thanks for talking to me.

 

I am sorry that the physical anxiety you have now is worse than what you had then.  I had worse anxiety than before benzos, one year ago exactly (which for me was about 14 months off). Everybody reacts differently.  How long have you been taking the lexapro?  I've heard that it can take a month or longer to build up and may increase anxiety for a while.  Others have a paradoxical reaction to SSRI and may be better off with non SSRI medication.  I suppose it's something to work out with your doctor.  Ultimately, hopefully when the time is right, you will be able to slowly taper off those other medications.  As far as the idea of never healing, there are some folks who are still protracted anywhere from 18 months to several years out but even then, I have heard of progress being made.  In some cases, symptoms can morph into other health conditions which are no longer "benzo withdrawal".  Some folks  have reported on various conditions such as chronic fatigue, arthritic conditions, MS type symptoms or tremors, other nerve issues, Shingles or other immune system malfunctions... I, for example, got Shingles about a month after I completed my taper.  I still have nerve tingling from it.  The good news is that the majority will likely not experience these conditions and will find that more complete healing happens somewhere between about 6-24 months.

 

Hang in there,

 

Vertigo

[[ib...]]

Hi Vertigo,

 

How wonderful to hear from you. As a matter of fact we are planning a couple of different trip this year.  The first one is coming up in May. We are going to cruise to the eastern Caribbean on the “Allure" I am really looking forward to this trip but at the same time I am a little apprehensive. As you may recall last year after my cruise I suffered for a period of time with “sea legs”. I had to take dramine for a while after we returned until the feeling finally let up. I contributed my sea legs to the benz taper since I did not experience this problem previously. 

 

How about you and the family any travel plans coming up?  Have you planned a fun trip for son this summer?

 

On another note, I am actually feeling a little better today.  It is so frustrating one day I feel almost like myself and than the next it back to my s/x kicking in again. I have to admit they are much less intense and I am confident as more time passes they will lessen. My husband and I were talking the other day about how fortunate I was to come across BB.  We agreed that I probably would not have got through the taper without all the help from you, Mimi, Rocko and the rest. Just knowing I could come here and voice my concerns and be reassured that my s/x would pass made the difference between my taper being a success or failure. I count my blessings everyday. 

 

Well take care and God Bless

 

Ibmom

 

[[wi...]]

Wow!  So sorry to hear of people suffering so far out.  I'm only at three months and have been hit this last week with a huge wave of sharp, stabbing nerve pain, fatigue and throbbing/painful gums.  Is this so strange!?!  My nerves are on edge and my temper short, but I am thankful that I'm not really anxious.  I had been doing so well.  I'm very glad that I know through many of you that these waves are not really setbacks.

 

Thanks,

Wish

[[ve...]]

Wow!  So sorry to hear of people suffering so far out.  I'm only at three months and have been hit this last week with a huge wave of sharp, stabbing nerve pain, fatigue and throbbing/painful gums.  Is this so strange!?!  My nerves are on edge and my temper short, but I am thankful that I'm not really anxious.  I had been doing so well.  I'm very glad that I know through many of you that these waves are not really setbacks.

Thanks,

Wish

 

Hi Wish.  Sorry to read about your recent "hurdle" or "wave"  :-).  I had a fair amount of fatigue at three months off but it got much better by end of month four. 

 

Hang in there buddy,

 

Vert

[[ve...]]

Hi Vertigo, How wonderful to hear from you. As a matter of fact we are planning a couple of different trip this year.  The first one is coming up in May. We are going to cruise to the eastern Caribbean on the “Allure" I am really looking forward to this trip but at the same time I am a little apprehensive. As you may recall last year after my cruise I suffered for a period of time with “sea legs”. I had to take dramine for a while after we returned until the feeling finally let up. I contributed my sea legs to the benz taper since I did not experience this problem previously.  How about you and the family any travel plans coming up?  Have you planned a fun trip for son this summer?  On another note, I am actually feeling a little better today.  It is so frustrating one day I feel almost like myself and than the next it back to my s/x kicking in again. I have to admit they are much less intense and I am confident as more time passes they will lessen. My husband and I were talking the other day about how fortunate I was to come across BB.  We agreed that I probably would not have got through the taper without all the help from you, Mimi, Rocko and the rest. Just knowing I could come here and voice my concerns and be reassured that my s/x would pass made the difference between my taper being a success or failure. I count my blessings everyday. 

Well take care and God Bless

Ibmom

 

Hi Ibmom.  So nice to read your post that you are feeling a little better and that there is less intensity to your symptoms .  Thanks for the appreciation.  I was helped by some good folks in the last couple years as well, particularly when things got really stressful after my elderly father almost didn't make it as my taper ended in Nov 2009, Shingles in 2010 and some ups and downs in the first year off.   

 

Today is 26 months off valium for me .  I also recently noticed that it's almost two years since I started this thread back in February 2010.  I was floored when I noticed that there have been almost 50,000 views here.  I guess there are a lot of folks who read but don't post much like you IBmom .  About a year after I started this thread, I wrote a success story.  I found myself feeling significantly better by about 16 months off, which was March of last year.  That is not to say it will take you that long or that I was plagued by serious symptoms for that whole time  .

 

I was feeling about 75% at 6 months off and 80% or better at about a year.  But there were a few waves where things dropped to about 60-70% or so, setbacks that were not pleasant, mostly after a stressful trip or family situation, or big change like getting a young unhousebroken puppy exactly a year ago .  I think somebody posted at the time that ultimately that dog would help me with overall healing in the long term.  Still waiting .  No, he's actually a great pet now and there have been many positive benefits to bringing him in from the local shelter.  As for the future moving forward, outside of some occasional nerve tingling from the Shingles, I feel better and stronger than before I took that first valium .  I hope you will find some relief and more complete healing too, though hopefully in less time.

 

God Bless,

 

Vertigo 

[[ve...]]

...geez i had such a darn slam today - one of the worst episodes ever.  so thankful folks are on here telling me that is somewhat normal for this process because today was one scary day.  so electrified and weird feeling.  if anyone has a chance to tell me again it will go away i'd be so thankful.  my faith is stronger from this tho- and i made it back to the classroom.  at 3 am i thought it might be a medical leave for me but i think i can keep going one day at a time.

thanks so much for being there.

 

Hi Pan.  Sorry to read about your rough day.  Yes, the intensity of the waves will likely dissipate or even go away, but more importantly, true healing might be when you can get to a point of not fearing the next wave, knowing you will cope with it and get through it, each time gaining a little more confidence that you are stronger than you thought. The more you want something to go away, you paradoxically give it more power.  You are one of the benzo warriors and heroes, Pan.  Don't forget that.  You have made it through the worst and are off the benzo.  You continue to give back to others, including with the work you do with children.  This is ultimately going to make you stronger.  As you said, one day at a time .

 

Hang in there,

 

Vertigo

[[ve...]]

19 months off and feeling like i have lost all progress.. What the heck happened i wonder i was feeling pretty well for months...

 

Hi Dpete.  It may not be as uncommon as you think to start to feel much better at 15, 16, 17 months out, then maybe start to get in a comfort zone where you reintroduce some old lifestyle habits, such as alcohol,  take a long trip, "party more" or other recreational things, stay up late, eat more unbalanced meals...  Others have sometimes reported that after catching a virus, it is possible to have a reaction to an antibiotic (particularly ones like levaquin or cipro which most would suggest avoiding) or steroid medication for the flu or other bug....

 

Our nervous systems may remain sensitive for a period of years despite reaching a nice point of healing at some point in the first or second year off a benzo.  Also, some on this thread and around forum have written about a general increased vulnerability to stress in the first year or two off the benzo.  I don't believe this is what Professor Ashton or other experts refer to as "protracted withdrawal".  Unusual circumstances might trigger a few symptoms if things get rough as in starting a new job, taking more work on at a job, losing a job or having hours cut back (particularly in this recovering economy), working night shift or other long or increased hours, lack of sleep, financial pressures, family illness, marital problems or strain on friendships or on a primary relationship.... and for the ladies, some monthly cycles, menopause or pre menopausal symptoms reportedly led to increase in some setbacks.  A number of buddies have also had reactions to progesterone creams which apparently can impact GABA receptors... also one ought to be careful about abruptly stopping medications for GERD such as prilosec or nexium which also can impact the GABA site.  They are best tapered off of slowly. 

 

In my case, having a sick parent with cancer the last five years has at times resulted in a variety of unexpected situations or hospitalizations for which I have had to fly out and deal with. This has sometimes led to jet lag and some other intermittent symptoms, particularly when dealing with a difficult sibling.  After a stressful trip, I sometimes return with some blues or let down which can take a period of days or even weeks to adjust to.  This was true before I took a benzo too, since  my father has had cancer for a couple of years which preceded my use of valium.  It's been a great thing for him to be able to get multiple remissions, but there have been some close calls  where he has been hospitalized with pneumonia,  staph infections or other immune system weakness... and this has led to some strain on my own health at times, such as getting Shingles in 2010.  Even as recently as October of last year at about 23 months out, jet lag and anxiety spiked a bit on my last visit. I've had to fly over ten times in the last 26 months to take care of my father or visit my inlaws, maybe it's more than the average amount of stress to take on .

 

Even the "normal" stresses of life can impact a sensitive post benzo system, as it adjusts to being both having been on a benzo for a period of time as well as in the initial months and sometimes a year or two off it.  I really did not expect to be posting here two years after my taper ended.  This thread seems to have resonated with quite a few folks (50,000 views is no small number).  I have both gotten and given support where possible.  Yet I honestly do not believe I am protracted at 26 months out.    Before I took that first valium pill in 2008, I had some sleep trouble (much worse than today) had fairly high anxiety relating to my father's illness (much less today) and a couple of other life stresses.  I am very grateful that I am off the valium and will never ever go back on a benzo to deal with life's challenges. I think it can be frustrating at this point in your recovery Dpete, but understanding that it can be normal to still get some occasional waves this far out, might help you and  others to endure the rest of their post benzo journey as well.

 

Vertigo

[[pa...]]

Hello once again!

Pan, I saw your question to me and I wanted to respond...

What I have noticed with melatonin use was an increase in the intensity of my dreams on some nights. It is difficult for me to rate this because I also take small amounts of remeron plus the fact that I have used melatonin for some time now. The dreams that I do have remind me a lot of dreams that I had when I was much younger. Yes, sometimes there are 'bad dreams' but I'm not sure if this is due to the melatonin or due to the prolonged traumas I had going on for a few years. I did have some 'unusual' nightmares occur after my father died and I got plunged into a seemingly endless nightmare of legal tangles, financial whoas plus a constant barrage from certain family members.

I do recall that towards the end of my taper with valium, I continued to take melatonin before bedtime. I started noticing some 'new' kind of agitation, so I stopped the melatonin and when I did, the agitation symptoms seemed to disappear. However, I haven't noticed any problems like that come up since being off the valium. I did stop melatonin on occasion and didn't notice any w/d other than it took me longer to get to sleep.

About a year ago, I started having some serious sleep problems to the point that I became phobic about not getting to sleep. I think I lost about 40% of my sleep from Jan-March. However, this did pass and when I look back I can see some triggers that added up to me developing that problem. Since then, I am happy to say that sleep has not been an issue quite that badly other than the fact that my work/sleep schedule changes and can through me out of whack temporarily.

Best wishes to you and I hope this answers your question.

Also a heart congradts to V on 26 months off! In another month, I'll be celebrating 24 months since the end of my taper. Thanks so much V for sticking around the forum and for continuing your support. I have been much less active here the last few months. Since the new year began, I have been checking back and catching up on others progress.

Hope you all are having a great week and I'll check back another time.

[[Wi...]]

One sign that one is taking a larger dose of melatonin is vivid dreaming/nightmares (per Dr. Oz).  Also one of the less common side effects of Remeron is vivid dreaming/nightmares.  So if you are on a small dose of both, they may be working together to give you intense dreams.  Or if you are taking a higher dosage of just one, either can cause this.  The dreams are distressing but not harmful and IMO are a result much more of a physical component s/x than a psychological cause.

 

For what it's worth...

[[ro...]]

Hi All:

 

Been reading ALL the posts here -- IBMom - always good to hear from you - I hope you gain some good forward ground in your recovery.  I looked into a cruise in June on Oasis of the Seas - another Carribean humongomous cruise ship.  We will fly into San Juan and spend a week there -- I'm looking forward to a benzo free celebration of some kind.  I hope your cruise is lovely and you enjoy the entire time without symptoms.  Let us know how the trip goes for you. 

 

Verti; your words are always filled with wisdom, encouragement, and food for thought.  I'm glad to hear you are well healed and able to travel and enjoy your life again.  Hope your father is doing well too.  So true how the normal things we used to be able to do pre-benzo now might bring forth some old symptoms and be more difficult to handle.  But yet, we have always had emotions such as anxiety of some ilk in certain situations.  But they are emotions and are meant to serve us for a purpose. 

 

Pange; interesting to hear that you had some agitatioin from melatonin too.  That's what I have been experiencing for months and months.  I would take melatonin at bedtime.  In doing some research on excess serotonin,  the agitation, sweating, chills, tremors, and muscle twitches can be a mild form of too much of a good thing.  I would have all these symptoms (and blamed them on benzo WD) on random nites.  And sometimes nausea in the a.m. with benzorrhea.  And crazy dreams out the wazoo!      I am day 12 of not taking melatonin and while it takes me a few hours to fall asleep, my nites and days have been so much better.  And the fatigue is much better too.  Going without sleep does make us anxious about the next nite and the nite after, etc.  It can be a nasty cycle. 

 

It's enlightening to read about the senior BBS who have healed and share their experiences.  Gives us all hope and we all need that right now. 

 

Best regards,

Rocko

[[ve...]]

Hi All: Been reading ALL the posts here -- IBMom - always good to hear from you - I hope you gain some good forward ground in your recovery.  I looked into a cruise in June on Oasis of the Seas - another Carribean humongomous cruise ship.  We will fly into San Juan and spend a week there -- I'm looking forward to a benzo free celebration of some kind.  I hope your cruise is lovely and you enjoy the entire time without symptoms.  Let us know how the trip goes for you.  Verti; your words are always filled with wisdom, encouragement, and food for thought.  I'm glad to hear you are well healed and able to travel and enjoy your life again.  Hope your father is doing well too.  So true how the normal things we used to be able to do pre-benzo now might bring forth some old symptoms and be more difficult to handle.  But yet, we have always had emotions such as anxiety of some ilk in certain situations.  But they are emotions and are meant to serve us for a purpose...

 

It's enlightening to read about the senior BBS who have healed and share their experiences.  Gives us all hope and we all need that right now. 

Best regards,

Rocko

 

Hey Rockster!  Good to see you're still around and still healing .  A week in the Carribean as a reward for your benzo battles sounds fab!  Whenever I read about a cruise, it gives me pause since it was a cruise for me that eventually led to my vertigo after the c/t off just three weeks of valium back in 2008.  I still am not certain whether it was just going off the valium c/t or also the sea legs and abruptly stopping the dramamine  that caused the vertigo that fateful summer.  Guess I'll never know, but I'm not rushing to plan another cruise as much as I did enjoy that first one .  I tend to get a little car sick in the back seat of a car so I also took the bonine for the week on that cruise, along with 5mg valium per night.  I suppose it was probably the combination of going off both that got me although I continued on valium for three days after the cruise was over before I ran out of it after returning home.  I hope to get to San Juan or another island some day Rocko.  As far as summer plans Ibmom, I think we might do some sort of road trip this summer, maybe up to Montreal, Martha's Vineyard or Maine, not sure yet.  We really enjoyed going cross country a couple years ago and it's great to not have to fly!!!

 

Rock on Rocko

 

Vertigo

[[he...]]

Anyone here feel like they have full blown Fibermyalgia , I have been having steady syeady burning , deep deep burning muscles , alot of aches and pains all over but not intense aches and pains just feel like I am sore and tender, and tensed up, on top of all the other symptoms this has got this bad in the past Mth , I havent a window as I always did, no lessening of intensity, no waxing and waning, but I dont have any fatique , I have the opposite alot of energy, but insommia at nite. 

[[we...]]

Benzo withdrawal mimic fibromyalgia.. They have increased sensitivity to pain and so do we. I'm glad to hear that you are not getting the fatigue, too bad for the insomnia. You think those two would go together.

[[ve...]]

Anyone here feel like they have full blown Fibermyalgia , I have been having steady syeady burning , deep deep burning muscles , alot of aches and pains all over but not intense aches and pains just feel like I am sore and tender, and tensed up, on top of all the other symptoms this has got this bad in the past Mth , I havent a window as I always did, no lessening of intensity, no waxing and waning, but I dont have any fatique , I have the opposite alot of energy, but insommia at nite.

 

Hi helpme123.  Sorry to read about the ongoing steady burning sensations without a window, along with the insomnia.  Are you able to exercise at all?  That could help with the insomnia, even a small amount of light exercise.  Can your muscles take a light massage?  There are so many types of massage, not sure which kind might benefit vs make things worse.  I get the sense that a strong or deep tissue massage might lead to more pain although sometimes one takes a deep massage that hurts for a day or two, but ultimately helps the circulation and gets the kinks out.  Although I'd be careful of Thai massage.  I had one that was too strong and had back pain for weeks later. The only other thing that I've heard might help is a warm bath with epsom (sp?) salts.  As far as fibromyalgia, have you been diagnosed with this or suspect that you might have it or symptoms like it?  I always thought fibro came with a lot of fatigue which you said you do not have.  Meditation/yoga might be another avenue that might be worth exploring.  Muscle tension can sometimes be relieved with calm breathing and various stretches, although some stretches might not be your cup of tea, others could possibly improve some of your symptoms with time.  How many months are you out now?  At some point, I think Prof. Ashton is not opposed to a brief course of something like elavil or other a/d of the kind that might address the pain and sleep to stabilize you and then later taper off. I know some others here might be  opposed to taking any new medications until one has at least tried to gut it out for a year to 18 months.  I personally have not taken additional medications but have felt at times like my neurotransmitters were a little off balance, particularly between months 9 and 15.  It's almost as if I made significant strides in healing in the first six months off valium,  but not enough to withstand the reintroduction of alcohol, jet lag and a month of unhealthy eating on summer vacation in 2010 at months 7 and 8 off valium.  Then I went too far with a diet and exercise in months 10 to 13 along with getting a new puppy which led to some insomnia and sleepless nights that got my system off balance.  I think one has to be careful once one feels relatively well, to still gradually reintroduce old lifestyle habits.

 

Perhaps some mild a/d or other medication might be worth exploring, Helpme123?  Just thought I'd throw the idea out, even though many might frown on it.  My father had very bad spinal pain a few years ago which was so intense, it kept him from sleeping.  He found quite a bit of relief from neurontin/gabapentin.  His original doctor tried to prescribe it three times a day but we eventually found a doctor who switched it to something like 400-600mg before bed only and that seemed to help him a lot.  Now  he is back down to 300mg.  Recently he added melatonin and he has reported better sleep in the last week that he has been on it.  There have been some recent posts about melatonin on this thread in the last couple of days.  I realize that neuronten  is a controversial medication that some others have tried and had mixed results.  It is not a benzo but apparently acts on the site in some way, can help with sleep and pain, but ultimately must be tapered off like the benzo.  If I had to choose one thing  to try to help with pain and sleep trouble for a three month course, I'd probably go with a low dose of  the elavil/amytriptoline, but that's me. I would discuss all options with your doctor, including the ones which would not involve medication.

 

Keep us posted,

 

Vertigo