Insomniac support group

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I hear you, man. Whenever I’m feeling better or am in a slight window, I’ll eat some sugar and it’ll set me back. Hang in there. We’ll beat it!

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It’s be nice if this thread could get started up again. A lot of people here are dealing with insomnia and I’m one of them, unfortunately. I still had a way to go, but was doing much better and then made the mistake of drinking a bit at the start of July.  Set me way back. Everything has since reset to what it was before I drank except sleep. I’m stuck sleeping 1.5 to 2.5 or 3 hours a night now.

 

Jrm, that's also what I sleep. I feel at the end of my rope. Do you still work? At night I watch gossip programs on TV, it helps a little not to go into impending doom mode. But just a little. I'm too tired but can't sleep due to terror of withdrawal. What do you do when you can't sleep? I also listen to Bayliss as YouTube videos.

[[jr...]]

It’s be nice if this thread could get started up again. A lot of people here are dealing with insomnia and I’m one of them, unfortunately. I still had a way to go, but was doing much better and then made the mistake of drinking a bit at the start of July.  Set me way back. Everything has since reset to what it was before I drank except sleep. I’m stuck sleeping 1.5 to 2.5 or 3 hours a night now.

 

Jrm, that's also what I sleep. I feel at the end of my rope. Do you still work? At night I watch gossip programs on TV, it helps a little not to go into impending doom mode. But just a little. I'm too tired but can't sleep due to terror of withdrawal. What do you do when you can't sleep? I also listen to Bayliss as YouTube videos.

 

I’m a full time college student with a part time job. And I took two summer classes this summer, so I haven’t really had any time off. I’m really surprised by how well I function on so little sleep. It totally sucks and I’m definitely not functioning at my maximum capacity, but I’m still performing well at school. I’m only 22 though, so I guess I have my age on my side. And when I can’t sleep, I just lay in bed and wait for sleep to come. I try not to watch tv or videos around bed time. I think that can interfere with sleep. I don’t have to distract myself to avoid any feelings of impending doom, though. Anxiety and feelings of doom went away pretty early in my withdrawal. They had a bit of a resurgence for a couple of weeks after my setback last month, but have again gone away.

[[va...]]

It’s be nice if this thread could get started up again. A lot of people here are dealing with insomnia and I’m one of them, unfortunately. I still had a way to go, but was doing much better and then made the mistake of drinking a bit at the start of July.  Set me way back. Everything has since reset to what it was before I drank except sleep. I’m stuck sleeping 1.5 to 2.5 or 3 hours a night now.

 

Jrm, that's also what I sleep. I feel at the end of my rope. Do you still work? At night I watch gossip programs on TV, it helps a little not to go into impending doom mode. But just a little. I'm too tired but can't sleep due to terror of withdrawal. What do you do when you can't sleep? I also listen to Bayliss as YouTube videos.

 

I’m a full time college student with a part time job. And I took two summer classes this summer, so I haven’t really had any time off. I’m really surprised by how well I function on so little sleep. It totally sucks and I’m definitely not functioning at my maximum capacity, but I’m still performing well at school. I’m only 22 though, so I guess I have my age on my side. And when I can’t sleep, I just lay in bed and wait for sleep to come. I try not to watch tv or videos around bed time. I think that can interfere with sleep. I don’t have to distract myself to avoid any feelings of impending doom, though. Anxiety and feelings of doom went away pretty early in my withdrawal. They had a bit of a resurgence for a couple of weeks after my setback last month, but have again gone away.

 

Congratulations for doing so well at college Jrm. I'm 51 so no youth here. And the terror is worse than the insomnia. The terror is why I can't sleep.  Does anyone else here have this kind of insomnia and how are you coping? Yes, TV can be bad for sleep but with the terror I need TV because it's a distraction from my thoughts, which are really bad. Hope we all get some relief.

[[MT...]]

Hey guys. The insomnia section on the BB forum is also a great source in case you haven't discovered it. Insomnia really sucks but it eventually does get better.

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Thanks, MT.  I’m familiar with the insomnia section.

Last night was alright. Got 4-5, maybe even a little over 5 hours of sleep. I had a little edible with 10.7 mg thc before bed, though, so I won’t count it as a truly good night. A good night to me is one with completely natural sleep.

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jrm97,

I got your PM but I am currently not allowed to PM. Long story. So I have to reply to you here. Your insomnia is quite normal and your reaction to having a beer was too. Alcohol works on your brain sort of like benzos do.

I would be careful about adding in another drug now. THC IS a drug and I am sure you already know that. All drugs work on your brain but in very different ways.

Whatever. Benzo wd often create insomnia. If you are getting at least 4 hours a night, you are doing very well. You will NOT die from lack of sleep! POWs are deprived of sleep on purpose by the enemies. But seldom does any soldier die from this. Their brains automatically give them micro sleeps which prevent them from dying. They may feel like death warmed over but they are still quite alive. Benzo wd kind of is similar to being a POW. People in custody have to learn how to wait it out without giving up. They have to distract themselves, and work on staying hopeful. It would be EXTREMELY unusual for anyone to die from lack of sleep.

I always tell people what worked for me, but seldom does anyone try it. I listened to sleep hypnosis videos I found on YouTube. Do NOT watch them, just listen. It took several months for the hypnotic suggestion to affect me, but for the first time in over a year I was slowly able to go to sleep naturally. Some people seem to think that "hypnotic suggestions" could be dangerous, in some sort of strange way. I never found that to be true. Sleep hypnosis works by the speaker repeating various small phrases that gradually you start to relax to. My favorite speaker always said "right now" as one of her hypnotic suggestions. How this works is pretty easy. You listen to the video and picture the things she/he says. Do what they suggest, like "take a long slow deep breath".  Eventually your brain begins to relax just a bit and if you listen to this stuff every night, eventually it WILL help you go to sleep.

Kinda cool, huh?

east

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I’m sleeping 1-4 hours a night, unfortunately. And I’m trying to stick it out without taking anything to sleep. I had a nice string of 5 consecutive 3-4 hour nights of completely natural sleep in the past week (it’s crazy that I can even say a 3-4 hour night is nice), but then another 1-2 hour night last night. It has me feeling discouraged. This is just brutal. And you actually responded to my PM about a week ago, which I really appreciated. And I appreciate the second reply, too!  it’s great that you tak the time to even do that.

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My favorite speaker always said "right now" as one of her hypnotic suggestions.

 

east, who was this? I'm still in the market for good go-to-sleep videos/audio.

 

Thanks.

 

Katz

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jrm,

I literally owe my LIFE to BB. Without it I would have reinstated and would most likely be dead now. I was THAT far gone. I sure wish I could PM you but I cannot.

Yes, not sleeping normally is hugely scary. Most people associate not sleeping with depression, or something even worse. For us, its purely a wd symptom.

Benzos work on a special part of your brain. The amygdala, which is the FEAR center of your brain. Anxiety is just mild fear, right? Well, benzos "damp down" your amygdala, allowing you to feel more relaxed and go to sleep. But when you go off benzos by ANY ways or means, your amygdala over reacts and causes intense insomnia, anxiety, downright FEAR. This is quite normal. And once you start healing, all of this will just fade away.

In BWD, its the WAITING that is torturous. We wait and wait and hope and pray that what we read here is the truth. If one is smart, they will try some of the stuff us old warriors suggest to them. Because we do know what helped and what did not. Distracting yourself will always be your best way of coping.

Please just hang on because I do sense that you are already starting to heal. Hang on tight and keep going forward. Your healing will arrive when its ready to.

east (Annie)

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katz,

my favorite sleep hypnosis person was Jodi Whitely, easily found on YouTube. I listened to MANY of those videos and for whatever reason, Jodi's worked best on MY addled old brain. It took about 3 months for the hypnotic stuff to sink in. For me, a female voice was more soothing but that's just me. A male voice that really helps in Paul Ogilivies. He has a LOT of relaxation videos out there, and he is a really nice guy to boot. He even answers emails.

I listen to many of those videos and by a process of trial and elimination I found out what worked best for me. Do not WATCH those videos! The light will keep you awake. Listen ONLY.

east

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I have noticed some minor improvements in the past few weeks. I really really really hope it’s genuine progress and not just a cruel tease. Ugh. I was so much better before my setback. I definitely wasn’t healed, but I was way better off than I am now. I tend now to oscillate between feeling hopeful about recovery and despairing of my insomnia possibly being permanent. I never had this issue before withdrawal, but I still find myself wondering sometimes if it’s even withdrawal. It started immediately after I stopped etizolam, though, so I know that it has to be.

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I honestly do believe that what you are feeling is PURE benzo wd. You fit the classic mold for that, jrm. Even your fear that it  is not withdrawal is classic bwd stuff.

Bwd is an up and down thing for almost everyone. Some have windows and waves, others (like me) just feel miserable all of the time until our brains DO heal.

Insomnia, anxiety and fear are perhaps the most common symptom for someone going through benzo wd. Try to put your fears to rest. Think if me, someone who took nightly benzos in enormous doses for thirty years. And was forced to go cold turkey off it all. Yes, I had a truly bad wd, but I DID heal. I feel so wonderful now, it still amazes me. Going through this might have broken me but it did not. I endured it and WON over benzos. You can too. Never give up.

east

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Thanks for that, east. I have a sort of random question for you. Did your tinnitus go away? That’s one of the symptoms that I still have.

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Is anyone else's sleep also super light filled with dreams? It's like I'm on the border of awake and light dreaming the whole night.

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PTSDmiracle,

 

What you describe is totally normal for where you are. It gets better. Truly.

 

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I wish it would get better quicker lol.  :muscle:

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my favorite sleep hypnosis person was Jodi Whitely, easily found on YouTube. I listened to MANY of those videos and for whatever reason, Jodi's worked best on MY addled old brain. It took about 3 months for the hypnotic stuff to sink in. For me, a female voice was more soothing but that's just me. A male voice that really helps in Paul Ogilivies. He has a LOT of relaxation videos out there, and he is a really nice guy to boot. He even answers emails.

I listen to many of those videos and by a process of trial and elimination I found out what worked best for me. Do not WATCH those videos! The light will keep you awake. Listen ONLY.

 

Thanks, east!!!

 

 

 

Katz

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Just popping in to say hi. I don't come on BB much anymore. It definitely gets better over time. It can take waaaaaaay too much though. I slept about 9 hours last night. Which is crazy considering a few years ago I sometimes would only get 2 hours in one night if I were lucky and then not sleep for another night or two and do it all over again. That pattern continued for a long time, but it did eventually get much better.

 

Ptsdmiracle, I had so many of those nights were I felt like I was pseudo asleep and partially dreaming. It's really common for people recovering from benzo induced insomnia. Just hang on for the wild ride until it comes to a stop. I felt like a zombie for a long time. Much better now. So just keep putting one foot in front of the other until you make it across the finish line. 

[[jr...]]

I sure hope I get better. I hate how up and down the process is. A week ago, I had a string of 4-5 hour nights. I was falling asleep fairly quickly and waking up around 5. I didn’t mind getting up that early, though, as I was sleeping better than usual. But for the past week, I’ve been stuck in the 3-4 hour range, needing 3+ hours just to get to sleep most nights. I just don’t get it. I was better at 12 months off than I am now at almost 15 months off. I can’t believe that such a small amount of alcohol could set me back like this. It’s super frustrating. But anyways, thanks for coming back to post. It’s encouraging to hear from someone that made it to the other side.

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I sure hope I get better. I hate how up and down the process is. A week ago, I had a string of 4-5 hour nights. I was falling asleep fairly quickly and waking up around 5. I didn’t mind getting up that early, though, as I was sleeping better than usual. But for the past week, I’ve been stuck in the 3-4 hour range, needing 3+ hours just to get to sleep most nights. I just don’t get it. I was better at 12 months off than I am now at almost 15 months off. I can’t believe that such a small amount of alcohol could set me back like this. It’s super frustrating. But anyways, thanks for coming back to post. It’s encouraging to hear from someone that made it to the other side.

I might try chamomile tea again tonight.  I both love it and fear it.  I love it because it does seem to improve my sleep but I fear it because some BB say it acts like a benzo.

 

My current situation is I spend about 12 hours (from 10pm to 10am) trying to get enough sleep.  I think I am in some sort of sleep state for about 10 of those hours.  When I get these 10 hours, I feel pretty good and can do things (work, YMCA, movies, normal stuff).  But needing to commit so many hours just to feel good is a bummer.

 

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7 hrs, broken, deeper bizarre dreams

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Lol oops I've been posing on the wrong thread, meant to post it on the sleep tracker thread. Haha benzo brain strikes again

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Thanks siggy!

I will keep moving forward even though it's a huge struggle.

I hope my insomnia doesn't comeback back full force after coming off of mirt. I'm only on 0.75mg now. I'm sure it's still doing something but I hope it's not masking everything at to low dose.

[[Fi...]]

Hi,

 

Joing this group because I struggle with sleep and am still tapering.  Currently I sleep every other night.  On the bad night may 1 1/2 -2 hours of sleep and on the good night 5-6 hours of broken sleep.  I usually sweat heavily at night and early mornings.

 

I do use a small dose of melatonin, magnesium gylcinate and L-tryptophan to help me sleep.  I rotate these because they lose their effectiveness.  I have to use something because the Clonazapam is not effective for sleep and at times works against me dropping off. 

 

I used to be a great sleeper before meds.  Now I have black out curtains, wear an eye mask and ear plugs.  I still have 4 am awakeings with anxiey and trembling. 

 

Looking forward to giving and getting support here.