6-12 month thread....

[[Co...]]

Green....if it is any comfort,  since my dizziness set in again 4 weeks ago my heart has been thumping and bumping too ( not continualy but in bouts. Foes yours settle down after a time?...

.....Green this will end...I am sorry that you are are wavy...me too,  but today is better again...yesterday was miserable with d/r and head s/x...I am trying to stay distracted...it works for some chunks of time . I am so glad that you are not falling into despair. ...Pm me if you start falling over the cliff. This just has to be our last looooong wave. ...coop

[[Mo...]]

Peace ... yuk ... sorry I am not aware that I have had issues with "depression" ... at least not as I notice ...

 

And, that "where is the med for this" song isn't going to help at all ... sorry this one is playing for you again ... this one will stop playing just like all the others ... take care my friend ...

 

Thank you, Nova.

This depression comes with such despair and hopelessness. It's impossible for me to 'realize' my mood was ok a few days ago. It feels like I've been depressed for months and like it will never go away. All the other symptoms are awful, but I don't doubt their transience. The depression feels forever. Life has written about this too. It's also so hard because there are so many drugs marketed for depression. It makes me question waiting it out. A few more days, I tell myself. Just try to get through a few more days.  :'(

 

Peace... depression is the worst of the worst in this.  Here is an article I just read about depression and exercise.  Please try it. http://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-exercise-depression-20140925-story.html  I absolutely get relief with exercise.  This morning I woke into melancholy.  Waking into this stuff is really tough.  It's like waking into a pit of tar and trying to walk around in it.  At the very least, stay in contact with the boards and hubby.  Thru out the day.  Don't worry about complaining.  Just get it out. 

 

I know you are weary.  This day in and day out stuff is grueling.  I have added back 1/2 cup of coffee to my Teechino because it is a mood lifter.  Can you do anything like that? 

 

[[Mo...]]

Words, words, words ... all I have is words ... so damn inadequate ... when what I yearn to do is to reach out and hold ... and be held ...

 

To feel someone's calmness when I am being thrown about by another whirlwind ...

 

To breathe with you until you find your centre one more time ...

 

To stop my mindless search for the meaning of all this and be soothed by your loving silence ...

 

To distract you from your quest for relief with a walk in the sun ...

 

To quell my restlessness and sit peacefully with you while we wait for our healing to come ...

 

 

And tonight, once again, all I have are words ... your words and my words ... from your fingers to my heart ... from my fingers to your heart ...

 

This expression of words across this screen ... a beacon that will help us find our way home ...

So, on this breath I know our words are not inadequate ... and the yearning, well, the yearning is a blessing to share ...

 

My yearning is my healing reaching out to me ... beckoning me home ... we are all coming home ...

 

Nova.. so absolutely beautiful..  Ah.. you got me in my spirit.  These words however... are brilliantly adequate and able to hold me and us together thru this.  Thank you for that..

[[Mo...]]

Anyone feel 100% healed in this group?

 

I suspect that many people who hit 100% healed have gotten to the point that they no longer post, because they no longer need to. That's why I am making a concerted effort to come back from time to time.

 

I'd say I feel about 90% healed, 85% healed on a bad day. It's really hard to say, because I did have some real issues with anxiety and depression that lead to me being put on the xanex. I may in fact be at nearly 100% now, but I am leaving a few percent open so I can express my further improvement in a few months' time.

 

Thanks so much NotGleeful.  We are always looking for those ahead of to reach back and bring us forward with them.  So wonderful and good of you to share how great you are. 

[[Mo...]]

Green....if it is any comfort,  since my dizziness set in again 4 weeks ago my heart has been thumping and bumping too ( not continualy but in bouts. Foes yours settle down after a time?...

.....Green this will end...I am sorry that you are are wavy...me too,  but today is better again...yesterday was miserable with d/r and head s/x...I am trying to stay distracted...it works for some chunks of time . I am so glad that you are not falling into despair. ...Pm me if you start falling over the cliff. This just has to be our last looooong wave. ...coop

 

For us heart pumpers.. I am having a break. 

 

I really love you both.  Even in your s/x I hear strength. 

 

My hot flashes have lessoned into sweats.  I have slept two nights in a row and woke up only to throw the covers off when a sweat came.  No morbid thoughts, just a nuisance and then fell right back to sleep.  This morning I woke up with melancholy and wondered if stopping the vit D had something to do with it because of the serotonin receptors. 

 

I am still seeing flashes in my vision (I think I only mentioned this to Green).  Something is definitely happening hormonally because I've got hives on my wrist.  After the birth of my 2nd child I spent the following year fighting hives from the hormone fluctuations.  I hope this means my cycle and the sweating are on the way to going back to normal.  Will keep you posted. 

 

Other then that going to do some website work and then maybe some exercise... 

 

:crazy:MommyR

[[Gr...]]

Green....if it is any comfort,  since my dizziness set in again 4 weeks ago my heart has been thumping and bumping too ( not continualy but in bouts. Foes yours settle down after a time?...

.....Green this will end...I am sorry that you are are wavy...me too,  but today is better again...yesterday was miserable with d/r and head s/x...I am trying to stay distracted...it works for some chunks of time . I am so glad that you are not falling into despair. ...Pm me if you start falling over the cliff. This just has to be our last looooong wave. ...coop

 

Coop, thank you so much for your support.  You have no idea how much it means.  It always astounds me, how tough you are, that you've  been dealing with this so long and really didn't complain.

 

So I had the thump-bump thing, in bouts, but last night was rough, even if I didn't let it scare me, it had amazing staying power and was distracting.  Impossible to sleep, even without the crazy vibrations. I HATE THE VIBRATIONS!

 

In the past when I've been hit with this, I was devastated, couldn't leave the house, the fear took over.  So I did my little rant on my log.  but I'm going to try to  cautiously step forward, not get too crazy.  The vibrations all night is much worse than the heart bumping, for me.  The vibrations are exquisite torture, I have to shake my whole body to try shake them off.  Has anyone gotten this?  And the crazy, intrusive thoughts came with it, but my mind is clear enough I was able to shoo them off.

 

Thanks for listening.

Hope you have a good day, Coop.

[[Gr...]]

Green....if it is any comfort,  since my dizziness set in again 4 weeks ago my heart has been thumping and bumping too ( not continualy but in bouts. Foes yours settle down after a time?...

.....Green this will end...I am sorry that you are are wavy...me too,  but today is better again...yesterday was miserable with d/r and head s/x...I am trying to stay distracted...it works for some chunks of time . I am so glad that you are not falling into despair. ...Pm me if you start falling over the cliff. This just has to be our last looooong wave. ...coop

 

For us heart pumpers.. I am having a break. 

 

I really love you both.  Even in your s/x I hear strength. 

 

My hot flashes have lessoned into sweats.  I have slept two nights in a row and woke up only to throw the covers off when a sweat came.  No morbid thoughts, just a nuisance and then fell right back to sleep.  This morning I woke up with melancholy and wondered if stopping the vit D had something to do with it because of the serotonin receptors. 

 

I am still seeing flashes in my vision (I think I only mentioned this to Green).  Something is definitely happening hormonally because I've got hives on my wrist.  After the birth of my 2nd child I spent the following year fighting hives from the hormone fluctuations.  I hope this means my cycle and the sweating are on the way to going back to normal.  Will keep you posted. 

 

Other then that going to do some website work and then maybe some exercise... 

 

:crazy:MommyR

 

M, how long did the insomnia last?  And did you get the vibrations?

[[Mo...]]

Green....if it is any comfort,  since my dizziness set in again 4 weeks ago my heart has been thumping and bumping too ( not continualy but in bouts. Foes yours settle down after a time?...

.....Green this will end...I am sorry that you are are wavy...me too,  but today is better again...yesterday was miserable with d/r and head s/x...I am trying to stay distracted...it works for some chunks of time . I am so glad that you are not falling into despair. ...Pm me if you start falling over the cliff. This just has to be our last looooong wave. ...coop

 

For us heart pumpers.. I am having a break. 

 

I really love you both.  Even in your s/x I hear strength. 

 

My hot flashes have lessoned into sweats.  I have slept two nights in a row and woke up only to throw the covers off when a sweat came.  No morbid thoughts, just a nuisance and then fell right back to sleep.  This morning I woke up with melancholy and wondered if stopping the vit D had something to do with it because of the serotonin receptors. 

 

I am still seeing flashes in my vision (I think I only mentioned this to Green).  Something is definitely happening hormonally because I've got hives on my wrist.  After the birth of my 2nd child I spent the following year fighting hives from the hormone fluctuations.  I hope this means my cycle and the sweating are on the way to going back to normal.  Will keep you posted. 

 

Other then that going to do some website work and then maybe some exercise... 

 

:crazy:MommyR

 

M, how long did the insomnia last?  And did you get the vibrations?

 

EEk... don't want to tell you.. I have had it since July..  I had maybe a break here and there, but haven't slept thru since our vacation.  Yes.. the vibrations.. I wake into the vibrations in my body.  The head buzzing happens when a hot flash is ready to hit.  I get a feeling of doom or discomfort under my skin..then my head feels like buzzing or alkaseltzer being poured over it and then flash..  Working on the computer gives me the dizzy, boaty feeling, but oh well..

 

Just a day in the life, right?  Mentally I am really solid.  Not scared, no fear or panic located in me.. well, maybe panic... but it's not in my brain.. just in my throat..

 

 

[[wh...]]

Hi guys;

Sorry about the head pressure...I don't seem to have that particular s/x but I get chest and solar plexus pressure....ugh.

Sky:  I have bad dreams sometimes all night as well; before it was every night now it is once or twice a week...still weird and vivid dreams though.

What are some of the intrusive thoughts you get???  Mine are more of a feeling and then my brain puts a thought to the feeling....trying to match up with my body?  Weird. causes me great distress ...... :'( Makes me feel dread/doom like dying? so hard to describe.

Today is manageable again but I feel it percolating under the surface. I get that electric feeling throughout my body a lot still but I have to say things are better than at the beginning of all this. 

I hope they come up with something to speed this up for us or make it more comfortable so we can function without fear; pain and anxiety.  I'm going to read success stories today.  Can't shake the dread and anxiety at the moment.

We are healing though.....we are.....patience grasshopper....OMG if we don't learn patience from this experience we never will.

[[Gr...]]

Green....if it is any comfort,  since my dizziness set in again 4 weeks ago my heart has been thumping and bumping too ( not continualy but in bouts. Foes yours settle down after a time?...

.....Green this will end...I am sorry that you are are wavy...me too,  but today is better again...yesterday was miserable with d/r and head s/x...I am trying to stay distracted...it works for some chunks of time . I am so glad that you are not falling into despair. ...Pm me if you start falling over the cliff. This just has to be our last looooong wave. ...coop

 

For us heart pumpers.. I am having a break. 

 

I really love you both.  Even in your s/x I hear strength. 

 

My hot flashes have lessoned into sweats.  I have slept two nights in a row and woke up only to throw the covers off when a sweat came.  No morbid thoughts, just a nuisance and then fell right back to sleep.  This morning I woke up with melancholy and wondered if stopping the vit D had something to do with it because of the serotonin receptors. 

 

I am still seeing flashes in my vision (I think I only mentioned this to Green).  Something is definitely happening hormonally because I've got hives on my wrist.  After the birth of my 2nd child I spent the following year fighting hives from the hormone fluctuations.  I hope this means my cycle and the sweating are on the way to going back to normal.  Will keep you posted. 

 

Other then that going to do some website work and then maybe some exercise... 

 

:crazy:MommyR

 

M, how long did the insomnia last?  And did you get the vibrations?

 

EEk... don't want to tell you.. I have had it since July..  I had maybe a break here and there, but haven't slept thru since our vacation.  Yes.. the vibrations.. I wake into the vibrations in my body.  The head buzzing happens when a hot flash is ready to hit.  I get a feeling of doom or discomfort under my skin..then my head feels like buzzing or alkaseltzer being poured over it and then flash..  Working on the computer gives me the dizzy, boaty feeling, but oh well..

 

Just a day in the life, right?  Mentally I am really solid.  Not scared, no fear or panic located in me.. well, maybe panic... but it's not in my brain.. just in my throat..

 

Okay, I get the doom/discomfort feeling (good description) in my chest before the flash.  I've learned that the hot flash and sweating is good, because it relieves the yucky feeling.

 

Eek is right.  I hardly ever sleep well.  But this really bad sleep pattern I had in May -- I have to check, but, yes, it lasted months.  Then it started phasing out, interspersed with nights of sleep, and then it went away.  I wasn't well then so it was very disruptive.  maybe now I have more healing under my belt and I can weather it better.

 

I get the boaty weird disorientation when typing on the computer.  And I can't scroll too fast.  That throws me into the spins.

 

I don't like to focus on symptoms BUT WHEN THEY'RE IN MY FACE I guess I have to, a little, lol

 

okay.  this was all good.  Air it out.  Take the punch out of the bully symptoms

 

Feel better, M, and thank you. 

[[pe...]]

Peace ... yuk ... sorry I am not aware that I have had issues with "depression" ... at least not as I notice ...

 

And, that "where is the med for this" song isn't going to help at all ... sorry this one is playing for you again ... this one will stop playing just like all the others ... take care my friend ...

 

Thank you, Nova.

This depression comes with such despair and hopelessness. It's impossible for me to 'realize' my mood was ok a few days ago. It feels like I've been depressed for months and like it will never go away. All the other symptoms are awful, but I don't doubt their transience. The depression feels forever. Life has written about this too. It's also so hard because there are so many drugs marketed for depression. It makes me question waiting it out. A few more days, I tell myself. Just try to get through a few more days.  :'(

 

Peace... depression is the worst of the worst in this.  Here is an article I just read about depression and exercise.  Please try it. http://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-exercise-depression-20140925-story.html  I absolutely get relief with exercise.  This morning I woke into melancholy.  Waking into this stuff is really tough.  It's like waking into a pit of tar and trying to walk around in it.  At the very least, stay in contact with the boards and hubby.  Thru out the day.  Don't worry about complaining.  Just get it out. 

 

I know you are weary.  This day in and day out stuff is grueling.  I have added back 1/2 cup of coffee to my Teechino because it is a mood lifter.  Can you do anything like that?

 

Thank you for permission to be here. Man, I need it right now. I feel so lost and alone. It's the depression. I don't want it anymore. I emailed my doctor and this is what he said,

 

Assuming that this is all medication withdrawal, I do believe it will resolve with time. Unfortunately, I can’t say just how long that will take, and it sounds like you’re struggling quite a bit now. I don’t think that any medication will present a “cure”, but bring them up because they can still give relief from symptoms, and that can be a good thing while you’re hopefully healing from the withdrawal effects. Since no no one but you knows how strong the symptoms are, you would have to decide if it’s time to look for relief, even temporary, from a different kind of medication (or natural therapy).

 

What do you make of that?

I hate feeling so desperate, the double edged sword of wanting relief but 'knowing' its just an effort in futility. Unless it's not. Does your addiction specialist have an opinion on antidepressants? Natural or otherwise.

 

Peace2

[[Co...]]

Mommy and Green....whew! ...we are all having the same s/x...M, the Alkaseltzer description is do perfect to describe the brain buzzing. And yes, the surge of adrenalin that precedes the hot flash ( my hot flash always has pins/needles all over my body), the dizziness when when reading of on the tablet/phone. I am not sure about vibrations,  I have read others complain of these...is it like a pulsing throughout the body? ( I get pretty good relief from that with a lavender epsome salts hot bath). The epsome salts soaks also seem to help the heart thumping.  They take some time ( about 20 minutes)..and I have to say I don't drag myself out of bed at night to soak unless I am in a ' go to er ' panic ( haven't had one of those for a long time...thank you god!). ...

....Green...you have nothing to apologize for...posting about s/x 14, 15 and 16 months out is only the truth of the matter. What I saw in those posts was improvements ...with a distance yet to go. I think they all said things were better than acute but each had one or 2 persistent and significant s/x That seems to mirror my progress at the moment ...Almost all of my s/x are really improved...reliably since July....EXCEPT ...head pressure/ boatiness. That one is significant ...loooong lasting and engages my anxiety. If I did not have the head pressure my anxiety would be 85% better ( and I think I will have minor problems with anxiety for a long time as the 2 trips to er scared the begeezus out of me ...and created a new phobia...the er cubby ).

.....I still have transient insomnia but without the torture of white knuckle anxiety,  cortisol surges,  dread,  fear and I trusive thoughts). I just wake up and can not go back to sleep so I watch infomercials,  bad movies, worse early morning news or write on BBs. Fortunately I don't have to be at my best to go anywhere...like work if I don't want to. I can usually sleep pretty well for

[[Co...]]

Mommy and Green...cont. post

....my screen 'sent' itself. ...lol....Anyway I was just closing with thoughts that we are all having similar s/x ..so it has to be w/d right?.....and it seems like we are making progress excepting for one or two significant persistent s/x. ...

.....We are getting there girls...all of us...the second year will be easier and bring us our lives back...thank you both so much for your support....wish you lived in my city.....coop

[[Mo...]]

Peace ... yuk ... sorry I am not aware that I have had issues with "depression" ... at least not as I notice ...

 

And, that "where is the med for this" song isn't going to help at all ... sorry this one is playing for you again ... this one will stop playing just like all the others ... take care my friend ...

 

Thank you, Nova.

This depression comes with such despair and hopelessness. It's impossible for me to 'realize' my mood was ok a few days ago. It feels like I've been depressed for months and like it will never go away. All the other symptoms are awful, but I don't doubt their transience. The depression feels forever. Life has written about this too. It's also so hard because there are so many drugs marketed for depression. It makes me question waiting it out. A few more days, I tell myself. Just try to get through a few more days.  :'(

 

Peace... depression is the worst of the worst in this.  Here is an article I just read about depression and exercise.  Please try it. http://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-exercise-depression-20140925-story.html  I absolutely get relief with exercise.  This morning I woke into melancholy.  Waking into this stuff is really tough.  It's like waking into a pit of tar and trying to walk around in it.  At the very least, stay in contact with the boards and hubby.  Thru out the day.  Don't worry about complaining.  Just get it out. 

 

I know you are weary.  This day in and day out stuff is grueling.  I have added back 1/2 cup of coffee to my Teechino because it is a mood lifter.  Can you do anything like that?

 

Thank you for permission to be here. Man, I need it right now. I feel so lost and alone. It's the depression. I don't want it anymore. I emailed my doctor and this is what he said,

 

Assuming that this is all medication withdrawal, I do believe it will resolve with time. Unfortunately, I can’t say just how long that will take, and it sounds like you’re struggling quite a bit now. I don’t think that any medication will present a “cure”, but bring them up because they can still give relief from symptoms, and that can be a good thing while you’re hopefully healing from the withdrawal effects. Since no no one but you knows how strong the symptoms are, you would have to decide if it’s time to look for relief, even temporary, from a different kind of medication (or natural therapy).

 

What do you make of that?

I hate feeling so desperate, the double edged sword of wanting relief but 'knowing' its just an effort in futility. Unless it's not. Does your addiction specialist have an opinion on antidepressants? Natural or otherwise.

 

Peace2

 

Peace, my doctor is pro meds and anything needed to survive this.  Depression is not the one you want to fool around with and I agree with your doctor you have to decide how bad this is.  If it is w/d, which I believe it is, then it will resolve itself.. however, you will have to come off the SSRI too.  Lots of people including Life had to do this, BUT your goal is survival.  You have to find a way to fire off the good chemicals in your brain.  You have to trick it. 

 

I still have the vision of you on the kitchen floor. 

 

Step back and look at what is on your plate.  You needed to make it to October right?  Almost there.  Just a few days shy.  Then reassess.  If you need to get out of the job and lay in bed to recover then do it.  No judgement here.  Sometimes pummeling thru things isn't the best way.  I am able to do it sometimes and others have me in bed all day.  Just like HH took the vacation day. 

 

My understanding is you will again deal with depression to get off an SSRI, however the other s/x will prob have mellowed by then.  I would try everything you else you can not to go the med route.  I know the physical stuff and mental stuff is enough to couch bound us. 

 

Try the exercise.  Try it once. 

 

Just make to October and then reassess. 

[[Mo...]]

Mommy and Green...cont. post

....my screen 'sent' itself. ...lol....Anyway I was just closing with thoughts that we are all having similar s/x ..so it has to be w/d right?.....and it seems like we are making progress excepting for one or two significant persistent s/x. ...

.....We are getting there girls...all of us...the second year will be easier and bring us our lives back...thank you both so much for your support....wish you lived in my city.....coop

 

Coop, no doubt what so ever this is w/d.  The head pressure I only have occasionally but it's huge during panic.  It is why I want to go to ER because it feels like I am going to have a stroke so validating the desire to go to ER, but the terrible fear of going there too because they might try to force something on you.

 

I can't bare to sit in a bath for 20min.  My kids start start yelling for me.. I have to be with them and ignore them.  Leaving my mind alone while soaking in a bath isn't desirable right now, but I do want to try it.  I just got this post from the thread I started about people having adverse reactions to vitamin D:

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=117328.0

 

These are men I believe, so it looks like we are not the only peeps.  I have yet to confirm it's the D with the outer worldly hot flashes.

 

I am totally in for a get together when we are further out to our healing.  It would be nice to have someone near unless were all acute on the same day..haha.. Then I'd be hiding from you.. LOL!

 

Ah.. the benzo bus is such a joy ride. 

[[Sk...]]

Hi guys;

Sorry about the head pressure...I don't seem to have that particular s/x but I get chest and solar plexus pressure....ugh.

Sky:  I have bad dreams sometimes all night as well; before it was every night now it is once or twice a week...still weird and vivid dreams though.

What are some of the intrusive thoughts you get???  Mine are more of a feeling and then my brain puts a thought to the feeling....trying to match up with my body?  Weird. causes me great distress ...... :'( Makes me feel dread/doom like dying? so hard to describe.

Today is manageable again but I feel it percolating under the surface. I get that electric feeling throughout my body a lot still but I have to say things are better than at the beginning of all this. 

I hope they come up with something to speed this up for us or make it more comfortable so we can function without fear; pain and anxiety.  I'm going to read success stories today.  Can't shake the dread and anxiety at the moment.

We are healing though.....we are.....patience grasshopper....OMG if we don't learn patience from this experience we never will.

 

Whoot, you described it very well, but intrusives can be worse than that.

 

Today, I was having one of my daily chats on the phone with my mom and I had this thought that she was going to die and I had to keep her online as long as  possible eitherwise I would be sorry. Now thoughts of death and suffering are very common bu this was so different, I can't explain.

My mother does have health problems so that, does not help. Today, though, she had a cold and I went nuts over that. ANd I kept her on the phone for a very long time, poor girl !

 

NOt gleeful's story is wonderfully inspiring. I copied it out on Evernote and a Word doc.

 

THis is a hellish day for me but, for many others too I see.

 

About, the vitamin D. I had to take it some months ago because of the operation. I had to quit, it made me very sick. I had to quit anything and everything, even though because of the operation, I needed some things. But I made my choice.

I would have to be my own lab rat, like other buddies, who try to find the right amount for them of magnesium. I would rather not, but that is just me.

 

Peace, I have no idea of how much you are suffering, so sorry.

 

Coop, we are still on the wavy list, I see. THis is one club we have to leave, don't you think ?

 

My brain issues are back to square one.  I always measure my suffering by how long I have not been studying my benzo obsession, Spanish. I always drag myself, no matter what, to do at least ten minutes, it's a routine that soothes me. When I don't do that, it means things are really bad. It's been over a week so I know it has been really bad.

 

i know it sounds silly when alll this suffering is going on, but this, and drawing have helped enormously both for retraining whatever is left of my poor little brain, but also to calm me down and stimulate me positively.

 

I plan on using this language on a super holiday in the future ! So when I practise, I feel closer to some tropical beach. does anybody have any dreams to sustain through wd ?

 

I thought about Nova, alone at home. I have that phobia too, with mr SKy. I am scared he will go to bed, fall asleep and leave me alone with wd . Let alone, leave the house for a few days. Poor guy, he really needs a break !

 

At night, we hold hands the whole night. I squeeze stronger when a symptom gets stronger or hurts too much.

 

Now I am going to bed, I first have to take my warm shower and then the rumba with Morpheus ? Or his evil twin ?

 

Healing thoughts to everybody from across the ocean.

[[Co...]]

Peace...I hope your depression lifts soon enough that you don't have to consider ADs...but only you hoe much you can tolerate. I know from your posts over the months that you are stony as steel. I have also listened to the Siren song of " there must be SOMETHING out there to stop this misery "...Like you I am sensitive to everything under the sun. My brother just went through ADs in the matter of 6 weeks trying to get on one that he could tolerate. He ended up with serotonin syndrome and has gone through absolute hell. Other meds are a crape shoot. Often you have to go through several to hit the one that doesn't make things worse. On the other hand nobody can go very long in major ot clinical depression. If your depression lifts at all from time to time it would seem w/d related. If you can wait you you could save yourself another w/d in the future..  Only you can know what is right for you. We are here to support you no matter what. ...Depression stinks...it is awful...but the depression of w/d heals. My heart is with you Peace....wishing you some relief...love to you dear friend....coop

[[Co...]]

Peace....* STRONG..STRONG as steel*.....NOT. stony as steel....jeesh ...so sorry about that...coop

[[mi...]]

Hi dear Benzo Buddies

 

I want to apologize for not writing a word for such a long time. Used to hang out here while I was tapering xanax, and had the honor to help as a  mod for a few weeks. But when I jumped, on April 14, 2010 things were very tough for me.

 

Wantalife contacted me a few days ago and said that I should write a success story here. That’s something I always had in mind but never felt ready to do until now. I really hoped this moment would arrive sooner. Back then, I saw someone writing a success story just two months after quitting xanax and I hoped that would be the case for me too. Lol.

 

Jumping and the days that followed it were the worse of my life. There’s no reason to describe the symptoms now. I didn’t have extremes, like seizures, but experienced a lot. I needed to stay off work and in bed for about a month. After that I slowly and painfully got off bed and out of the house, and back to work, with the help of my mom and boyfriend, now husband. The really bad symptoms were over, but the bad time went on for a long time after that. I now strongly believe that I rushed myself and didn’t listen to my body while I was tapering. I wanted off as soon as possible, and preferred to suffer instead of going slower as my body sometimes was screaming me to do, especially near the end. So that’s my only advice: To go as slow as you need and never rush yourself.

 

My last bad wave was a year ago. Last August. After that there was constant healing and me feeling better and better. There were times that I felt I would go back to bad symptoms again, but it never happened. Even the worst of them (the awful head feelings that went on for months and months) are GONE. I am fine, I feel great, HEALTHY and so grateful… So great I even quit smoking a few months ago

 

coop...here is a post I found, this lady healed at about one year, head pressure was what caught my eye.....m...

[[wh...]]

Thanks Minnie

I'm glad you are better.  You're like a ray of sunshine.

I was just on the floor begging for relief.  So tired of the anguish/anxiety.  I want to be my self again

I know we all do.

Hope everyone has a better night.

Thanks Sky. Me and my guy hold hands all night too.  I wouldn't make it without  him and you guys.

[[mi...]]

Hi Whoot.... I have been where you are it will get better....so glad you have your honey to  help you through this...I am much better thanks.....

 

The story above is not my story...I found it and thought it would help all of the people here who are suffering with the head pressure....

 

Sorry for the confusion....I am new to copy and paste and missed the writers identity... .

 

...m ...

[[Co...]]

Minnie...thanks do much...my head s/x cycled in and out throughout the day,  but the first part of the day was really good...nice big sunbreak most of the day. Dizziness is back this evening but it is pretty mild. It is so reassuring to read that people eventually heal from " month and months " of head pressure...I hope yours is still better today...coop

[[mi...]]

Thanks coop.....my head s/x remain very low...to soon to say they are gone.....but the hope is there....I love finding things that say they do go away completely....we know they do, but can never be enough reassurance for us....

 

I am glad you are doing better....m ...

[[Co...]]

Minnie.. so true...not enough reassurance for this one...thank you with all my heart for sharing the gems of head s/x healing.

  ..You paid your dues. .and a lit more. I hope you never ever have so much as a twinge of head pressure again...coop

[[mi...]]

Minnie.. so true...not enough reassurance for this one...thank you with all my heart for sharing the gems of head s/x healing.

  ..You paid your dues. .and a lit more. I hope you never ever have so much as a twinge of head pressure again...coop

 

Thanks coop... :smitten: