Benzo Lies That Have Been Busted

[[no...]]

*bump*

[[Aj...]]

Thank you!

 

I needed this.

 

Mine are:

 

I will end up where a I was before having to reinstate thinking a I have no choice but to kill myself but too terrified and grief-stricken to do it. It was like holding a gun to my head trying to be brave enough to pull the trigger but not able to all day for 3 months.

 

My muscle problems cannot be resolved because they are the reason for the diazepam & were only lessened a bit by it. I will be in rigid agony for the rest of my life.

 

All my senses will stay derranged forever and the world will never go back to normal but will stay frightening and horrifying.

 

My partner will die or my or his landlord will want one of the flats back. I will end up homeless.

 

My movement disorder problem will get so bad I won’t be able to breathe out again without it pulling me side to side constantly.

 

I will be stuck in hell, terrified of my own body and everything in my flat but unable to kill myself. Or if I try I will fail and end up locked in but feeling all the same things and unable to communicate it.

[[no...]]

*bump*

[[of...]]

Benzo Lies

 

I was talking with a friend about the lies that benzos tell us and thought it would be a good idea to start a thread on the topic.

 

Here are some benzo lies that I previously posted on my blog and thought it would be good to start this thread off with.

 

Please add some of the lies that you used to believe and now know to be untrue.

 

This will be very valuable for those who are still under the spell of the lies that benzos tell us. My experience is that our thinking is fundamentally altered by benzo action during tolerance withdrawal and during tapering, and that we are not actually thinking – we are at the effect of chemical storms in our brains. And we think that these are our thoughts. And worse yet, we BELIEVE these thoughts. But what we are experiencing is chemical and electrical processes that occur during the body’s attempt to adjust these chemicals and processes on the fly.

 

 

Now that I am feeling better, it’s easy to see some of the lies the benzos tell us. They are plain to see in hindsight. But for those of you who are having troubles with taper symptoms, or pre or post-taper symptoms, I wanted to help you to see  some of the lies that the benzos have told me, and may be telling you too.  Hopefully, you will be able to use this to understand more about your experience and maybe you could use this post as a template for reality.

 

Benzo Lie # 1. There is no hope.  This one is nasty. Do not believe this lie. It can take you down fast. It is not true, even though it feels very true. For me, this hopelessness was a result of benzo created chemical imbalances coloring my thinking into a perceived end of time. I could not imagine time extending for more than 3 months into the future. There was no way I could think of any possible outcome at all – not even a negative one, and all of my imagined outcomes of less than 3 months were negative. If you cannot imagine a positive future for yourself, know you are under the trance of lie # 1.

 

Benzo Lie # 2. My Life is ruined.  Do not believe this lie. You are in a temporary state of withdrawal. It is an awful state, but it is temporary and you will move out of it and have a life that you can mold into what you had before or one that is better than before. When you can think clearly, you are able to fashion a life that is better than what happened to you when you were tranquilized and your life fell apart as a result of being drugged. When you are out of withdrawals and free from the effects of their symptoms, you will be in a better position to solve problems instead of having them take you down.

 

Benzo Lie # 3. These benzo effects will last forever.  I see this lie as being conditional.  The lie part is that if you are making decisions that will move yourself toward health and away from benzos, it will not last forever. There WILL be an end to the benzo-related troubles. As you get further away from benzos and their effects, the less the benzos will act on you.  If you make benzo related decisions that move yourself away from natural health and into benzo use, you may end up in a never ending loop of having side effects being confused as diseases, and having benzo symptoms being medicated with more benzos, and in turn, more and more drug and symptom interactions and more and more suffering.

 

Benzo Lie # 4. I will never be happy again  This lie broke my heart. I let this lie rob me of my dreams. I am living proof that you can totally believe this lie and live to prove it wrong. I never thought I could ever be happy ever again. I’m not only happy now, but happier than I was before I started on benzos. I feel like I have just vanquished a dragon, and there is a great deal of satisfaction in that. Now, I am happy. I am happy just because I exist and because life is available to me. There is such joy in coming back from the edge and being able to function again.

 

I felt like there was no way happiness could ever be attained by someone who is going through all of this suffering and torture and ineptitude, and now I’m happy.  I am the guy that was scared to death of my cat for 2 years. I was freaked out because the gardener was going to come on Wednesday and scare me with the noise of his equipment and today it’s Monday and I’m worried about it already. I couldn't drive for over a year. . . and on and on.

 

If you are feeling that your happiness is behind you, do not despair. You cannot absolutely know that your best days are behind you. The effects of benzo action will make you believe you cannot be happy. It is not true. After your body begins making the feel good chemicals and you are out of wd, your life can get wonderful again.

 

 

These are just a few of the benzo lies that have I have busted for myself. And there are many, many more.

 

Try this on - If it makes you sad, it's probably a benzo lie.

 

You CAN be happy again. It will feel great, and you’ll love it more than ever. 

 

 

Please post the benzo lies that you have busted so others can learn from your experience.

 

 

 

River 

 

Needed this right now. Thank you for posting.

[[So...]]

Needed to read this today.  21 months off and during waves, the lies keep telling me I was always like this and that I will never get over this.  LIES!  Nova, keep bumping

[[no...]]

*Bump*

[[Ho...]]

I was on Adivan at age 50 for Menopause sxs.  I got off it it myself by dry cutting for a couple of months.  Didn't take long. My only sxs back then was High Blood Pressure reaction ONE TIME.  Anyway, I got off it and I was FINE, even had a brain Scan and all was HEALTHY!

 

    However, Stupid me, I went on it again......misdiagnosed as Anxiety when it was my Adrenals pumping out too much Cortisol which I discovered later.  But this time, it got hold of me good, and I do not know why.  I just turned 70, that could be why.  I don't know.  I've only been on 1 mg of Adivan for a year but now it's taking me longer to get off then when I was on it.  CNS is really overstimulated at this point.

 

  But I know that I will get off this sooner or later and I will heal like I did before. 

  Stop INVENTING things that you don't have in your minds!!  YOU WILL HEAL!

 

    Just do not ever go back on that garbage again.  I did not know when I got off it the hold it could have on you till now.  No one told me even though I was on it in the past.  I was not aware of its dangers till now. 

 

  So I've warned you.  But your health will HEAL.  Takes time for nervous system and brain to heal and put everything back the way it was but IT WILL HEAL!  It did for me, It will AGAIN!

[[Mo...]]

*Bump*

 

[[ea...]]

You must be a mind reader! I just told someone about the Benzo Lies. And here they are. Some of the most enlightening stuff I have read about benzos. Benzos do lie to us. And e just are not prepared for what we can go through.

Thank you for bumping this up!

[[4G...]]

Benzo thought "I won't be able to stand this any more and will have to die". I'm still in the middle of this so not sure it's a lie....

[[ea...]]

4gilly,

I felt exactly as you did back when I was still on my rollercoaster off benzos. Just as you said it. My mind was telling me I could not stand this stuff another minute, much less another hour or another day. The total fear I felt was so weird and debilitating. I wont forget the day I realized that I was walking with my butt all tucked in tight, due to the extreme and not-based-on-reality fear I felt then. At that point I had not found my way to BB, so I was truly without much support.

Once I did find BB things slowly began to get a tiny bit easier. Just knowing I was not alone was huge for me. I also learned a few things to do for my own particular set of weird symptom.

Later on in that first year I found Riverwolfe's blog/SS and read about "The Benzo Lies." It resonated very well with me. Benzos had lied to me for years, telling me I needed to take them every night or I would NOT sleep a bit. And like you, I wondered if I could bear it all for as long as it might take for me to heal. I felt as if I should be dying, that's how bad I was then.

Benzos tell us many lies, and this is just one of them. You can and WILL get through this, as long as you try to do the more constructive advice you will find on this site. It does take some work, trying different things and seeing what works for you. But it is so worth it.

Whatever you do, do not give up.

east

[[Co...]]

Following

[[Fi...]]

I needed to read this today even though it's still hard to believe I will get through. 

 

I have been polydugged and am now tapering a benzo after being on them 5 years ago.  I may also have Lyme and am treating that homepathically.  My full and active life stopped 8 months ago though I was getting sick before that from my Lamictal taper. 

 

I crawl through my days right now cutting as I can and praying I wont have to turn to another medication for the depression I feel.

 

The lies I am fighting daily are:

 

I'm too old and sick to ever break free of this medication.   

I will never be able to experience happiness or have a life again.

This agoraphobia will keep me housebound forever.

 

 

Thank you for these posts.

 

[[Sa...]]

Benzo lies ... keep telling me this physical pain is permanent!  It’s not!!

 

SaraSue 

[[Ki...]]

Thank you River Wolf,

 

This is a list of lies Fliprain wrote for me during a time of depression

 

Big Fat Benzo Lies,

 

1. I'm different. I'll never heal fully.

2. I will grow old and die alone.

3. I'll never be able to support myself again.

4. Why is everyone else feeling good and doing more and I'm not?

5. I tapered too fast, too slow.

6. I was kindled, poly drugged...it's different for me.

7. These symptoms  can't be just benzos. I must have a horrible disease.

8. I'm ok right now, but down the road, I'm going to have an event that sets me back.

9. My CNS is fried and will never really recover.

10. I have wasted my life.

 

Molly

 

 

 

Thank you for this

[[Kr...]]

I’ve been on BB for hours today trying to find something to resonate with how completely psychotic I feel today. Well... BOOM Thank you to all who have posted, and special thanks to River for starting this brilliant thread. I was in one of my stagnant fear puddles, wired-tired with my heart pounding out of my chest until I snot-cried for a good hour. This will be my go-to thread when I’m letting the lies get the best of me!

[[Fi...]]

I've had a few snot nose cries myself today and need also to kick the benzo lies to the curb.

 

 

[[ea...]]

Oh how NICE!! I have been talking about River's benzo lies for 7 years now. Reading about this on his blog truly opened my eyes, and that was in Year One for me.

River does not know how much his posts and Blog meant to this old warrior. But they sure helped me and I still pass that knowledge on to new people.

He had a bad wd just as I and you. NO benzo wd is fun or easy. We ALL think we are the worst cases ever known. That is just one of those sneaky benzo lies. That voice that lies tells you that you will never heal, that you are doomed, that perhaps you should reinstate and just give up. I have yet to meet a BB who doesnt think this way. Because BWD affects how we think and feel, the entire concept of "benzo lies" may be hard for you to grasp. But eventually you will get this and it could offer you some comfort and relief. It sure did for me.

east

[[Ta...]]

Thank you River Wolf,

 

This is a list of lies Fliprain wrote for me during a time of depression

 

Big Fat Benzo Lies,

 

1. I'm different. I'll never heal fully.

2. I will grow old and die alone.

3. I'll never be able to support myself again.

4. Why is everyone else feeling good and doing more and I'm not?

5. I tapered too fast, too slow.

6. I was kindled, poly drugged...it's different for me.

7. These symptoms  can't be just benzos. I must have a horrible disease.

8. I'm ok right now, but down the road, I'm going to have an event that sets me back.

9. My CNS is fried and will never really recover.

10. I have wasted my life.

 

Molly

 

I have been thinking all of these things. Glad to hear they are lies my brain is telling me!

[[Kr...]]

Bump bc this thread is gold!

[[ea...]]

I will always be grateful for RW's blog and SS as they made so much sense to me. The entire concept of "benzo lies" just made sense to me and I clung to that reasoning. I struggled and struggled through a horrible withdrawal. One I often felt might kill me. RW's posts gave me hope and gave me knowledge. I will never forget that.

east

[[Ta...]]

Well, I am worried that I am on the descent into early dementia.

I will be 2 years benzo-free as of tomorrow.

I hope to God this is a lie my brain is telling me!

 

 

[[Kr...]]

I will always be grateful for RW's blog and SS as they made so much sense to me. The entire concept of "benzo lies" just made sense to me and I clung to that reasoning. I struggled and struggled through a horrible withdrawal. One I often felt might kill me. RW's posts gave me hope and gave me knowledge. I will never forget that.

east

 

I feel the same East!  When I learned acceptance was key, I felt empowered and things really started to turn around. My sx didn’t magically stop, but the way I reacted to them changed. There were 2 key things Ive starting sharing that lead me to this enlightenment. The audible “Hope & Help for Your Nerves” by Dr Claire Weekes AND this brilliant thread by RW!

[[ea...]]

Yes,, oh yes. Acceptance relaxes you just enough so you can start the long process of healing. If you DENY benzo wd, you will not be able to just slowly move forward. That's how I see it, anyway. I worked on an acute psych unit for 4 years, truly a wonderful experience for this old nurse. I learned a lot, and one things was the mentally ill people do have to accept their condition and move on. Please do NOT misunderstand me. Benzo wd is NOT a mental illness! It is a temporary condition that does affect your brain and can make you feel as if you are insane. But you are NOT. We do heal, no matter what negative posts you might read.

I took nightly benzos for thirty long years and went CT off all of it including TWO benzos and TWO ADs. holy hell ensued. It tool me three years to heal enough to function, but to my utter amazement, my overall health is now SO much better. I am no longer depressed or anxious, and I was able to resume working over 4 years ago. That IS a miracle. I am now (gasp!) 69, and have the basic health of someone much younger. Benzos came close to killing me. That is fact. But I did beat  benzos and now am so much better. Never again, friends. Never again.

east

[[va...]]

Hi. I'm reading this thread and I really want to work on acceptance. How do you manage to accept when you spend all night in utter fear with no sleep? Is there anything that could help me accept that? Serious question. The fear is so bad I just think I can't go on. I with acceptance could help me but I don't know how to accept something so painful. Or a few moments I accept but then a wave of fear overwhelms me again and I just can't accept. Any advice?