Alcohol

[[bm...]]

I appreciate this positive feedback guys! Right now I'm dealing witg being light headed, shaky, blurry vision, dizzy. Hopefully it's only w/d and nothing else. I feel incredibly disoriented. Very weak as well, can barely see anything even with my glasses. I really hope this is w/d!?

[[bm...]]

When talking to people it's hard to formulate my thoughts because I'm so light headed and dizzy and can't think properly. This has been going on for a while, really hope this will end for I'm scared that I will always be like this

[[bm...]]

I just used the search function and read that the dizziness and lightheaded feeling can last a really long time. Can anyone tell me about this horrible symptom? I'm so dizzy and stuttering when I talk to people, feel so slow and nauseas!

[[Hi...]]

Yes noolie it's definitely not worth it.  There's a "pay me now or pay me later" with relief in benzo withdrawal i'm noticing.

 

Bmw, I have the same trouble all of the time....Another weird thing I've noticed is that I'm strangely intimidated easily of socially confident people and try to avoid them as much as possible.  It's mostly really direct, eye contacty people who get up in your face.  It's just too much bandwith for my system to handle and I get overloaded easily and start thinking about how I'm being perceived.  It feels like I'm looking back at myself, through their eyes, in a negative way.  I'm naturally pretty introverted as well so benzo wd probably just enhances it that much more....well let me end my diary entry here lol

[[Ho...]]

When I was in tolerance, I started drinking a LOT. Was not drinking to get drunk, either. Now that I look back, I was self medicating tolerance withdrawal. When it was at its worst, I was drinking 1-2 pints of vodka a day. That's no exaggeration. When I'd drink a pint, that was just maintenance. To feel any better I had to drink more. I was walking a straight line and later on after I quit, people that know me said they had no idea I was drinking that much. I drank like that for a year maybe more. I have no doubt I'd be dead right now had I not quit when I did. I'm 100% sure it was because of benzo tolerance.

[[No...]]

Yes noolie it's definitely not worth it.  There's a "pay me now or pay me later" with relief in benzo withdrawal i'm noticing.

 

Bmw, I have the same trouble all of the time....Another weird thing I've noticed is that I'm strangely intimidated easily of socially confident people and try to avoid them as much as possible.  It's mostly really direct, eye contacty people who get up in your face.  It's just too much bandwith for my system to handle and I get overloaded easily and start thinking about how I'm being perceived.  It feels like I'm looking back at myself, through their eyes, in a negative way.  I'm naturally pretty introverted as well so benzo wd probably just enhances it that much more....well let me end my diary entry here lol

 

I am exactly the same, I shy away from social gatherings, as I am suddenly very aware of how I am being perceived. I second guess everything I do, so it is less of a pain being in the world, if I stay away from the cognitive stress of social events. While in tolerance withdrawal, the days after drinking my social awkwardness and mental confusion became very pronounced, but slowly I returned to my normal tolerance problems, without the intense self a steam problems that the withdrawal "hangover" threw at me.

 

Before withdrawal I have never had any social problems, loving to be the center of attention, so I am 100% sure that this sudden change in personality is indeed all withdrawal.

 

We will all be better, and return to our old self

[[Hi...]]

the whole paradox of benzo withdrawal is that I was prescribed these for minor social anxiety about school lol.  hello irony.  What else is weird is that even when I have a good social interaction or make a joke and get people to laugh I will immediately criticize that in some way like "oh they were just fake laughs" or I'll even go so far as to think that people are in a conspiracy together to forge a specific type of interaction in front of me to make me think they're being genuine when they're really not.  I know it's the benzo withdrawal as well, so at least the temporary nature of this is comforting.  Benzo withdrawal makes you think the entire world is centered around you and you're little concerns, just look at how many times I've used "I" in this paragraph, lol.  I I I, me me me, my my my...shut up already you self centered douche

[[No...]]

LOL

 

You are right, I hate that about myself too. When it is hard to connect to the world, and deep emotions, then I believe that we become more shallow and egocentric. This will pass too, if you were not an ego tripper before this all started

 

When you are not plugged in emotionally, then it is harder to empathize. I cannot wait until my emotions return!

[[Fl...]]

When I was in tolerance, I started drinking a LOT. Was not drinking to get drunk, either. Now that I look back, I was self medicating tolerance withdrawal. When it was at its worst, I was drinking 1-2 pints of vodka a day.

 

Same here. I wasn't drinking that much, but it was a lot more than I ever drank in my life.

 

I had no idea at the time that I was self medicating tolerance wd, but that's exactly what I was doing. I could never really tolerate drinking in the daytime but I always looked forward to that time a few hours before bedtime every night where everything would melt away for a few hours. Now that I am healing from whatever this drug did to me I no longer have the desire or the tolerance to drink like that. I turned into a total light weight, which is for the best.

 

Oh, and another thing.....not only did I get started on vodka sometime during all of this (beer was always my drink of choice), but somehow I got hooked on vodka and grapefruit. No surprise there.....grapefruit changes the way your body processes benzos. Again, I had no idea at the time but now that I am benzo educated it all makes sense.