Discussion: Four Phases of Withdrawal-Where Are You?

[[De...]]

Definitely in Phase 3 and desperately looking for the door to Phase 4!

 

Anybody in Phase 3 and sensitive to many things but still do OK with Camomile Tea?  I've stayed away for 16 months and would REALLY like to get back on it.  Going to experiment with it in a few days but just wondering how other ppl are with it in the sensitivity stage?

 

Funny you ask, at almost 3 years out I still cant drink Chamomille tea. I can drink caffeine but not Cham for some reason.

 

What is your reaction it it???

[Guest [is...]]

Just some strange mental stuff a day or 2 after I drink it. I read a'lot about it and it does hit the gaba receptors.

[[De...]]

Yeah that's what I'm afraid of too.  I tried it back in May and 5 days afterwards I got a wave of nerve pain.  I never know if it is actually attributable to the camomile or not.  So frustrating.  I want so much to try it again, but I'm a nervous nellie about it too.

[[Hu...]]

Oh I had no idea about that with chamomile. I've been drinking multiple cups every day since day one almost!

 

I feel like I'm definitely in stage 3. Recently thought I was in 4 but had a wave so I guess not.

[[Gl...]]

Still at Stage 1. I got off valium 10 days ago after a thank God very smooth taper, following Ashton Manual, with no noticeable symptoms -- but at day 8 of post-benzo I had trouble sleeping, and this has continued to day 9 and 10.  No other symptoms, so far, thankfully, and thankfully still getting a few hours sleep. Hoping it will resolve fairly soon.

[[Pa...]]

Still at Stage 1. I got off valium 10 days ago after a thank God very smooth taper, following Ashton Manual, with no noticeable symptoms -- but at day 8 of post-benzo I had trouble sleeping, and this has continued to day 9 and 10.  No other symptoms, so far, thankfully, and thankfully still getting a few hours sleep. Hoping it will resolve fairly soon.

 

I like the sound of this, your insomnia is showing up right on time as you process the last of the Valium out of your body, hopefully this is the only post withdrawal symptom you'll have. 

 

May I ask, you say your taper was very smooth, does this mean you didn't experience intense symptoms?  I'm asking because I've noticed that those who have a rough time during withdrawal typically seem to experience the same once benzo free, at least in the early stages.

[[Gl...]]

Still at Stage 1. I got off valium 10 days ago after a thank God very smooth taper, following Ashton Manual, with no noticeable symptoms -- but at day 8 of post-benzo I had trouble sleeping, and this has continued to day 9 and 10.  No other symptoms, so far, thankfully, and thankfully still getting a few hours sleep. Hoping it will resolve fairly soon.

 

I like the sound of this, your insomnia is showing up right on time as you process the last of the Valium out of your body, hopefully this is the only post withdrawal symptom you'll have. 

 

May I ask, you say your taper was very smooth, does this mean you didn't experience intense symptoms?  I'm asking because I've noticed that those who have a rough time during withdrawal typically seem to experience the same once benzo free, at least in the early stages.

 

Hi Pamster:

 

Thank you for your reply.  I actually experienced no symptoms at all. I felt nothing out of the ordinary, and no insomnia.  I felt quite good throughout the entire taper. I hope you are right that it means I will have the same going forward.  Insomnia is a very difficult symptom to deal with though. I think I would rather have another one if I have to have one,  but we do not get to choose, and I hope it goes away for me soon.

 

I would really like to hear other peoples' experiences with insomnia after they stopped, but then again, we are all different and have different experiences on this journey.  Thanks again for your reply! It has given me some hope.

 

[[sh...]]

I can proudly say that after a long 12 months I am slowly entering phase 4. 😊

[[Oc...]]

Not sure I believe in the 4 phases

 

I felt like i was in 3 and food stree etc triggered waves but now its worse, brutal waves, dont know why i bother atm i really dont

[[Fo...]]

2

[[...]]

I should be early phase 3, these days I can say what Foods or Tea or Drinks makes me worse

[[Ho...]]

I’m in the phase where you realize your not going to heal from this! 3 years off and still having days like today which are very much like the months I spent in acute WD.

 

Best of luck to you all!

[[le...]]

Back into acute after 35 month!! Feel much same as hopper!

[[Ji...]]

Very good resource here.

 

I am wondering if my feeling right now at nearly 1 year off are related to protracted benzo withdrawal.

 

I feel very nervous/fearful at times, usually during the week. It could be stress-related as I am planning to move house and town(after 18 years).

 

I had thought that after one year, everything would be better than at 6 months, when I felt better than I do now!

 

I'm going to read all the replies here for some insight. Thanks for being here.

[[Pa...]]

Very good resource here.

 

I am wondering if my feeling right now at nearly 1 year off are related to protracted benzo withdrawal.

 

I feel very nervous/fearful at times, usually during the week. It could be stress-related as I am planning to move house and town(after 18 years).

 

I had thought that after one year, everything would be better than at 6 months, when I felt better than I do now!

 

I'm going to read all the replies here for some insight. Thanks for being here.

 

A year is a long time to suffer but unfortunately most members report recovery happens between the year and two year mark.

 

I believe stress is the biggest contributor to increased symptom severity, it's the first thing I ask a member when they mention having a rough time.  I know you can't do anything about the stress of moving but I'm hopeful that when you're all settled things will quiet down for you.

[[Fo...]]

I'm going to heal from this.  I refuse to accept otherwise. 

[[Fo...]]

It is a nonlinear ride through nightmares over here.  At first it seemed like I was following the”Phases” path, but clearly this is not so for me.

[[Fo...]]

It is a nonlinear ride through nightmares over here.  At first it seemed like I was following the”Phases” path, but clearly this is not so for me.

I feel you, still. Gonna keep pushing

[[so...]]

Eight years off and 99% recovered.  Just had another long haul symptom drop off this month.  Never give up hope.  While you are in recovery, something is always getting better, even if it’s so subtle you can’t feel it (YET).  What you do feel is BETTER all along the way.  But only if you focus on the BETTER, rather than what you have left.  I started out with 130 excruciating symptoms.  Over these past eight years, symptoms dropped off, symptoms decreased in intensity, symptoms came back on board at a lesser level, new symptoms jumped on board out of the blue.  I’ve been put through the wringer, but my mind was my friend, not my enemy. 

 

I feel bad for those of you who are clinging onto hope by your fingernails. Then you read a dire post of “permanent damage” and you feel like you’re losing your grip on hope a little bit.  To those of you who need to feel my hands around your wrists, I’m right here.  I know the truth about this process of healing and the truth is this.  Your body is designed to stay in a perpetual mode of healing.  It constantly seeks that “sweet spot” where you are feeling quite well today.  But that sweet spot isn’t a lock.  You are a human being and everything is in flux every day.  You are no different than other people who never took a benzo.  Do you really believe that other people walking this planet feel great every day?  Or do you believe that everyone has good days and bad days, and spend most of their time on earth somewhere in between?

 

You are healthy.  You are not sick.  There are people who are terminally ill.  There are people who live with difficult disabilities.  They do the best they can every day with whatever challenges they face.  Their success (or failure) at living life depends on their attitude.  Say outloud every morning, “I’m going to have a great day today.”  Sounds silly and useless, I know, but dammit it works for me every time.

 

“Peel the onion” to deal with the symptoms you have today.  Breathe through them.  The biggest piece of advice I can give you is to strive to stay calm.  I don’t have to tell you that fear and panic kick up your symptoms.  When you breathe slowly, everything calms down.  It took me years to master this skill.  I was really shitty at it in the beginning because I had no need for this skill before all this happened to me.  Well, now I need it and I’m good at it after eight years of practice.

 

I still eat whole foods.  I still read every label.  No preservatives. No gums. I still avoid chemicals and I buy “natural” cleaning and personal products on Amazon, just like many people do who are sensitive.  This is not only the best way to keep your symptoms from raging, it’s the healthiest way to live, period.

 

Please don’t waste any more time “waiting to heal.”  Don’t lay in bed, even if that’s all you feel like doing.  Get dressed and walk just to the end of your street and back to keep your blood flowing and your muscles moving.  I’m not asking you to run a marathon.  Just move a little so you don’t lose the ability to move. 

 

Don’t give in to agoraphobia.  The convenience of Amazon and the pandemic are turning us all into hermits.  Go to the grocery store and pick up a few things for dinner.  It’s good for you to get out of the house and stop focusing on your symptoms constantly.  Give your mind and body a break from the obsessive nature of this process.  It may not seem like you’re doing much, but you are sowing seeds of normality.  And those seeds grow.  Trust me on this one.

 

I haven’t posted anything on the forum in years, but recent posts here on the Four Phases thread from those of you who are fearful, yet clinging to hope, tugged at my heart.  I know the truth you are seeking.  You will feel reborn when your body has completed the majority of the repairs under construction.  But your body will never be “done.”  It will always be healing you until you leave this earth.  It’s what it does.  That’s its job.  Say thank you every now and then. 

 

I am grateful for every blessing I have.  I am grateful I made it through this mess in one piece.  I know where you are headed.  I’m right here waiting for you.  I can see you coming closer to me.  Keep walking. 

 

Sofakingdone

 

 

[[Li...]]

Thank you for an uplifting and elegantly written post, sofakingdone.

[[Ji...]]

Thanks for the kind words.

Another thing, I've cut only other see instance, gabapentin, f RR on 300 to 150mg. Maybe that is giving some withdrawal.

[[Pa...]]

Thank you sofakingdone, its so kind of you to some back to offer hope to others. 

[[so...]]

Jimmy,

 

Every cut you make, regardless of what drug it is, will cause your body to react.  This isn’t a bad thing.  It’s just the way your body works.  When your senses are heightened, which is what is happening to all of us, we feel EVERYTHING.  Every little change we make, every little hint of a chemical we get exposed to, every new food we eat, every bit of exercise we do, we FEEL it.  It’s cortisol.  And we have MORE than we need.  Keep cutting the drug slowly.  Stay functional.  This is not a race.  One day you will wake up and realize all you have left to taper is a crumb.  And you’ll walk right off the last of it.  When you do, please congratulate yourself for the monumental task you accomplished.

 

Whether you still take drugs, or you discontinue them, everyone who lives and breathes and does the best they can every day is a warrior.  Pushing through pain isn’t easy.  Accepting pain as a part of your life right now is sometimes unbearable.  Pain is always in flux.  It’s a pendulum.  Eventually the pain that’s associated with withdrawal will stop.  I have absolutely no pain anymore.  My back pain was the stubborn symptom that left just this month.  Eight years of pain and I have nothing anymore. 

 

Healing happens.  No matter how long it takes.  Healing happens.

 

Sofa

[[so...]]

Hi Pamster,

 

You are the one we should all thank for holding our hands and wrapping your arms around us.  We don’t say how much we appreciate you enough.  We don’t feel well and we complain more than we hug you.  Please know that I’m hugging you now, my face buried in your chest, my arms around you.  Thank you, Pamster, and all the other admins and Colin.  You kept my heart and soul safe for eight years. 

 

Sofa

[[Fo...]]

Hi Pamster,

 

You are the one we should all thank for holding our hands and wrapping your arms around us.  We don’t say how much we appreciate you enough.  We don’t feel well and we complain more than we hug you.  Please know that I’m hugging you now, my face buried in your chest, my arms around you.  Thank you, Pamster, and all the other admins and Colin.  You kept my heart and soul safe for eight years. 

 

Sofa

Agreed